Skillful Coach: Silence
from Change Your Thinking, Change Your Life Hosted by Michelle Burkhard
Not all silence means the same thing. At Level 3, the Skillful Coach begins to tell the difference between thinking silence, emotional silence, confused silence, defensive silence, andthe silence of a coachee who has left the conversation entirely. Michelle follows the coachee as a new question brings a different kind of quiet, one that turns out to be protection. Michelle explores how to notice shifts in pace, breath, posture, and energy without mind-reading, and how to name what is observed rather than interpret it. She cautions against turningany technique, including silence, into a coaching identity, because waiting every time can become as rigid as talking every time. The skill is discernment: knowing when to wait, when to rephrase, and when to ask what the coachee isnoticing, while staying humble enough to remember that only the coachee can say what a silence means. Have a question or a coaching moment you’d like Michelle to explore on the podcast? Email [email protected]. Grow your ability to notice what is happening beneath the words. Learn more about the January Coaching Academy at CA.GrowBy1.com. Reflection Questions What kinds of silence have I noticed in my coaching conversations, and how did each one feel different? What cues such as pace, breath, posture, or energy might help me notice that something shifted in a silence? How could I name what I observe in a silent moment without interpreting what it means for the coachee? When might my habit of waiting become as rigid as a habit of talking? How would I know whether to wait, rephrase, or ask what the coachee is noticing?
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