Super Hero Pose episode artwork

EPISODE · Mar 3, 2025 · 15 MIN

Super Hero Pose

from Desperately Seeking · host Mikhila McDaid

I run a small business with a colleague. This Summer will mark 2 years since we launched and I’d like to say we’re going from strength to strength but January hit us harder than expected. Partially supply related and partially a bit of burn out from the Christmas season but this week we bounced back in a way that really made me think.How much of the Q4 slump is a self fulfilling prophecy? We took our foot off the gas because we remember the post Christmas nose dive of last year. So did we think we could allow ourselves a break or were we protecting ourselves from that feeling of failure when orders decline? Further still, might we have kept things ticking over had we maintained pressure?Tomorrow we’re attending a market, which we booked as a bit of a jump start to the Spring season. We needed a warm up after 6 low effort weeks and when I tell you we turned things around in a matter of hours. We got together to prep for the event and it was like switching a light back on. I was back on track, refreshing the website, creating promotions, sending emails. I made 4 new scents, did the photography and prepped the listings on the site for everything we plan to launch in March – all things I would usually put off until the 11th hour.In 3 days we’ve had a sales week comparable with peak candle season .. in February.As someone who’s been semi-self employed for almost 15 years, success often feels completely out of my control. People say to keep at it and you’ll be rewarded but I have been on many paths that have felt like a real grind and haven’t led to that promised gold. Now I’m wondering, is it less about work and more about mindset? I’ve been straddling the world of sceptics and manifestation for a while but I do prescribe to the idea that your attitude affects your outcome. Not quite ‘believe it, achieve it’ but ‘whether you think you can or you think you can’t, you’re right.’So how can we change our attitude?I once participated in laughter therapy at an event. It was as crazy as it sounds and not something I would have chosen to attend but it was a group of bloggers who didn’t know each other and it was billed as a bonding exercise. Who was I to argue? I went in feeling stupid, having to laugh out loud and fake a giggle to the partner beside me but by the end, I truly felt better. We were all genuinely smiling and more relaxed. I felt my shoulders soften and physiologically, I can’t tell you there was any difference in the feeling in my body than had the laughter been authentic. I don’t think your body knows the difference between fake joy and reality. Laughing increases the brain’s production of endorphins so you still feel the effects associated with that – pain relief, reducing stress– and effectively manipulate your brain in to legitimately improving your mood.Have you heard the theory behind the super hero pose? I first read about this (listened, let’s be real) in Shonda Rhimes book, ‘Year of Yes’. She also wrote it in to Greys Anatomy so maybe you saw it demonstrated by Amelia Shepard? The idea is that you stand for 1 minute in the morning and it will have a positive impact our your behaviour all day. You can read about the study here, I’m not going to pretend you came to me for science and statistics but there’s some of both to back this up, if you’re interested. They also tested the inverse, with people sitting and slouching and compared the subsequent behaviours of both groups. It’s a fascinating idea that again supports something that has always felt a bit ‘woo woo’ for most of us. I have certainly experienced my chosen attitude affecting my day - for better and for worse - so maybe we do have more control than it seems. One of my 40 things to do before 40 is to go and see a motivational speaker. This week, my friend Emma and I booked a place on the Mel Robbins UK tour. We’re waaay in the back, standing room only but I figured it’s less about the visual and more about the word. It cannot be a bad thing to stand body to body with other (presumably mostly) women feeling the same kind of ‘lost’ as I am and looking for direction. I think of this kind of thing in the same way I assume others think of Church. We’re seekers of a different flavour but seekers all the same. I want to believe that I have some control over my life, those of faith choose to believe someone else does. Either way, we want to know someone has the wheel and we can actively participate on keeping the vehicle on track. So although I didn’t technically tick off any of my to-do’s this week, this feels aligned with at least one and it’s really shifted my attitude for Spring.WEEKLY UPDATESo what else happened this week?Honestly, beyond the market prep and business stuff, not a lot! I did post a couple of vlogs, which I’ll link at the bottom of this post but I didn’t get a lot else done. I wanted to start reading the book I just bought but I didn’t so much as crack the spine. The small business universe can really envelope you sometimes and this was one of them.Today, I’ve reset for a brand new season and I’m excited for sunnier skies and less frigid temperatures. If you didn’t catch my Spring Mood Board last week, you should go and check it out. It’s a great way to set a tone for a new period and reignite some passion about your daily life rather than always be wishing and hoping for the future. Until next week, I hope the weather holds out and we all feel a little brighter. CATCH UP ON THE VIDEOS I POSTED THIS WEEK: This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit mikhila.substack.com/subscribe

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