SWM 085 – Wet dreams, whether sexual dreams are sinful, a widow’s desires, and is oral sex a sin

Wet dreams, whether sexual dreams are sinful, a widow’s desires, and is oral sex a sin. Check out the show notes here for more details and links. Today we’re finishing up the questions we received from 2021 from our anonymous Have A Question page. There were quite a few and our family has been sick, so it’s taken me a bit to get through them all. But, I finally did it and we’re on the mend. I’ve also been busy kicking off the first cohort of the year for our Becoming More Sexually Engaged course. There’s still time to join if you’re interested, but I’m going to be closing it down until the next cohort shortly. With that out of the way, let’s get to the questions. I struggle with wet dreams. My wife and I have sexual activity once a week, either sex or a handjob. If we’re planning to have sex sometimes that can slip to a few days longer than a week if we are busy or tired. When that happens I’ll have a wet dream day 7-10, and then I won’t have as much desire for when we were planning to have sex the next day or so. Is there something I can wear at night to stop the wet dreams? We tried doing a handjob once it’s been a week so I don’t get a wet dream, but then if she wants to have sex the day or two after I have less desire. A few times she’s been irked with me and so she’s purposefully not finished a handjob, letting go right before the finish which is frustrating because semen comes out but it doesn’t feel great like an orgasm. The times she did that I deserved it and it was kinder than giving me nothing since I don’t masturbate. Since an unfinished handjob leaves me full of desire but still drains the pipes could that be a fix to the wet dreams? Or wearing something at night to prevent an erection? I think there are three issues here to address. Let’s talk about the wet dreams first. Wet dreams are normal, many men experience them when they’re younger. I’m not aware of any way to stop them other than having sex more often, and trying to stop an erection is not a good idea, I don’t think.