The Art of Intimacy: Crafting Connection in Memoir and Essay with Lilly Dancyger

Send us Fan MailJoin me and editor extraordinaire Lilly Dancyger as we discuss her latest book, First Love, an intimate, electric collection of essays on friendship, identity, and what it means to grow into yourself in community. During our conversation, Lilly shares her sharp insights on the craft of memoir, why she bristles at the idea of writing as catharsis, and how she pushes back against the dead girl trope by keeping her cousin Sabina fully alive on the page. If you’ve ever wondered how to turn memory into art without falling into the trap of polishing your pain, this one’s for you.Episode Highlights3:36: The Problem of Connecting Memoir with Catharsis10:12: Essays as a Space for Play and Variation13:04: Showing Intimacy on the Page21:12: Zooming In and Zooming Out27:00: Pushing Against the Dead Girl Trope33:44: Strategies for Cleansing Your Creative Palette Resources for this Episode: Canceling My Book Deal Was the Best Career Move I’ve Ever Made” by Lilly Dancyger“Why Your Memoir Won’t Sell” by Jane FriedmanMore Than True Crime with Sarah Perry Lilly’s Bio: Lilly Dancyger is the author of First Love: Essays on Friendship, and Negative Space. Her work has been published by The New York Times, The Atlantic, The Washington Post, Playboy, and Rolling Stone, among others, and she writes the Substack newsletter The Word Cave. Dancyger lives in New York City, and teaches creative nonfiction in the MFA programs at Columbia University and Randolph College.Connect with Lilly: Website: https://www.lillydancyger.com/Substack: https://substack.com/@lillydancygerBlue Sky: @lillydancyger.bsky.socialInstagram: @lillydancyger on InstagramBuilding Better Memoir Scenes: https://janefriedman.com/building-better-memoir-scenes-with-lisa-cooper-ellison/Connect with your host, Lisa:Get Your Free Copy of Ditch Your Inner Critic: https://lisacooperellison.com/subscribe/Website | Instagram | YouTube | Facebook | LinkedInProduced by Espresso Podcast Production