The Hidden Cost of Being the Good Girl with Sara Hirsh Bordo

What happens when being "good" comes at the cost of being yourself?In this episode, Ailey sits down with Sara Hirsh Bordo, author of Autoimmunity and the Good Girls, to explore the connection between people pleasing, self abandonment, and chronic illness. Together, they examine how perfectionism, self silencing, and the pressure to keep others comfortable can become long term strategies for survival.Drawing from Sara's personal story and the experiences of thousands of women living with autoimmune disease, the conversation explores how early conditioning shapes our relationship with our bodies, our needs, and our sense of worth. They also discuss the importance of moving beyond trauma comparisons and creating space for every person's experience to be honored.Ailey and Sara examine the relationship between chronic stress, inflammation, and autoimmune disease while emphasizing that illness is never a personal failure. Instead, they explore how self advocacy, nervous system awareness, and learning to disappoint others can become powerful steps toward healing.If you have ever struggled to put yourself first or felt disconnected from your own needs, this conversation offers a compassionate invitation to begin coming home to yourself.In this episode:2:26 Pausing Solo Episodes For Health5:08 What Being In Your Body Means10:54 Performing For Approval And Safety18:58 Trauma Comparisons And Patriarchal Scripts30:02 Receiving Care As A Nervous System Skill37:15 What Changes When You Assert Yourself43:38 Storytelling, Expression, And Identity Crisis52:06 Science, No Blame, And Next StepsLearn more about Ailey Jolie:Find: WebsiteFollow: InstagramExplore: SubstackExperience: Insight TimerSign up: InBodyMethodEmail: [email protected] follow along with the In This Body podcast:Follow: InstagramFind: WebsiteEmail: [email protected]