The Person You Think You Are Doesn’t Exist (How To Correct Negative Self-Concept) episode artwork

EPISODE · Feb 16, 2026 · 32 MIN

The Person You Think You Are Doesn’t Exist (How To Correct Negative Self-Concept)

from The Psychology of Depression and Anxiety - Dr. Scott Eilers · host Scott Eilers

The person you see in your head when you think “me” probably isn’t you.Most of us don’t perceive ourselves accurately—we see a distorted, unrealistically negative version. Not because it’s true… but because your brain is trying (and failing) to protect you from pain.In this episode I explain “The Magnet”: the force that pulls your self-concept downward after experiences like rejection, failure, and embarrassment—so you’ll “reject yourself first” before the world can do it.It’s a defense mechanism… but it comes with two brutal costs:You trade short, sharp pain for a lifetime of dull painYou start preemptively opting out of opportunities, connection, growth, and visibilityIf you live with chronic self-criticism, low self-esteem, or an internal “lowlight reel” that plays on repeat… this episode will help you interrupt it.If my podcast has helped, my new book, The Light Between the Leaves, goes even deeperNext Steps:📩 Get Practical tools for navigating life with depression and anxiety, delivered weekly.About me:I know what it is to feel hopelessly stuck and worthless to the world in general. I also know what it is to live without those feelings. I’m both a Clinical Psychology specializing in treatment-resistant depression and anxiety, and a human who has spent more than a decade managing sever depression and anxiety.Mental Health Coaching with meTherapy with me (for people in Iowa)Find me on YouTubeResources🪣 Get my free 5-day guide to reclaiming your time and energy despite mental health struggles.😴 Dramatically improve your sleep in 2 steps with my new Sleep Workbook.📖 My 1st book: For When Everything is BurningDisclaimer: This content is not intended to be a replacement for receiving treatment. It is purely educational in nature. My relationship with you is that of presenter and audience, not therapist and client.But I do care.

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