The Science of Revenge: Why Getting Even Feels (so!) Good—and How to Overcome it. With James Kimmel Jr.

Today’s guest is James Kimmel Jr., a former litigator of 20 years, currently Assistant Clinical Professor of Psychiatry at Yale school of Medicine and Author of the book we discuss today called The Science of Revenge: Understanding the World’s Deadliest Addiction—and How to Overcome It (2025).Here’s the question: What if revenge actually works like a drug—lighting up the brain’s reward system and keeping us stuck in cravings for payback? In this episode we talk about the neuroscience of revenge and why it can become compulsive, engaging similar reward pathways to those associated with craving and addiction. James tells the personal story that launched his life’s work—years of bullying, a devastating loss, and a split-second decision that changed everything. We explore how grievances fuel rumination, how self-control can get hijacked under stress, and what it takes to break the cycle. If you’ve ever replayed an old hurt or struggled to let go, this conversation offers a fresh, brain-based roadmap toward healing—including how forgiveness may just be one of the most underused tools for healing and freedom.Resource: https://www.jameskimmeljr.com We hope you’ll check out the muse brain sensing headband at choosemuse.com and use code untangle 15 for your discount.Grateful to our sponsors Quince, Welleco, Fabletica and Strawberry.me.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.