The Seven Magnificent Gladiators (1983)

Today on the TV/Movie Rewind Podcast, Matt & Todd ride out with The Seven Magnificent Gladiators—Bruno Mattei’s 1983 sword-and-sandals spectacle courtesy of Cannon Films.If you're Matt and Todd, you had us at either "Bruno Mattei" or "Cannon Films." But both?? We’ll chip in for the 4K restoration ourselves.If you're not familiar with that glorious pairing, it’s hard to explain just how much these movies mean to us. They're not trying to win awards—they're trying to inject pure entertainment into your bloodstream, like they've got a vendetta against subtlety and the solution involves kilotons of TNT strapped to a Chevy Caprice.What you're watching is the source code of entertainment. Just go along for the ride, and you will have a good time.The Seven Magnificent Gladiators is wild, it’s fun, it’s dubbed... and it’s working on a budget. An inspired remix of Kurosawa's Seven Samurai (by way of The Magnificent Seven), this version asks: “What if we did that in ancient Rome… on a Cannon budget… using actors who were already wearing swords-and-sandals for another production?” Starring (and our choice as their Magnificent Seven counterpart):Lou Ferrigno as "Han"—yes, Han. That’s what the "H" on his belt stands for. Definitely not Hercules, who Lou was coincidentally played at the same time. (Yul Brynner)Sybil Danning as Julia the most mercenary of the group (Brad Dexter).Brad Harris as Scipio, Han’s right Han-d (Steve McQueen).Emilio Messina as Goliath the gentle giant (Charles Bronson).Giovanni Cianfriglia as Festo (We'll go with Robert Vaughn I guess?).Sal Borgese as Glafiro (I swear he throws a knife or something in this, so he'll be James Coburn).Rubert Mura as Vendrix (Horst Buchholz).Carla Ferrigno as Pandora.Yahudi Efroni, earning our coveted 'Whit Bissell' Award as The Emperor.Dan Vadis as Nicerote—the most fashion-forward warlord this side of Humungous or Raven Shaddock.It’s Cannon. It’s Mattei. It’s awesome.Find and reach out to Matt on: Bluesky: @MovieMattSirois.bsky.socialFacebook:  The Movie Asylum of the Weird, Bad and WonderfulFollow who we follow: Once Upon a Geek and Fade Out Podcast