The Shadow Side of this Biz

We are in Scorpio season, which I love! Today’s episode will touch on the shadow side of being a spiritual entrepreneur. It is based on a question I received in the Spirit School Collective, my monthly membership, for a Business Q&A session. Most of what I share about my business is the exciting parts of the journey. There are metrics to show that my business is successful, but I am also nine years into my development. In addition to the magic that happens, there are parts of it that are not so positive. I’ve been thinking a lot about the dichotomy we experience where we are thriving in one part of life, while consistently struggling in another.  In this episode, I am sharing some of the challenging and painful experiences on my entrepreneurship path to give a more balanced perspective on what it has entailed. The question asked was, “I consider you successful as a business sister. You speak and do a lot of things that are very generous, and I know deeply you are a giving soul. How has that generosity of yourself healing sister wounds by supporting other women in their businesses impacted you?  And what is the return of spiritual energy for you?”   Spirit School Links Sacred Spirit Retreat Waitlist: https://view.flodesk.com/pages/63277136821b5d8e1a7d5614 Join us on the new FREE Spirit School platform: https://myspiritschoolcollective.com/plans/ Join the Spirit School Collective: https://www.squamishmedium.com/spiritschoolcollective Visit Spirit School at https://www.squamishmedium.com/ for all courses and upcoming programs View full transcripts of podcast episodes at https://www.squamishmedium.com/blog In this episode: I am not one to brag, but there are metrics to show that my business is successful Things can be going so well in one area while we struggle in another I have had magic unfolding as I acquire a physical space in Squamish Meanwhile, I have also been slighted in the past few weeks I’ve been told I make it look easy, but a lot happens behind the scenes that is not I wouldn’t be able to do everything I do without my team The reward and joy on this path is parallel to the problems we face Like motherhood, the beauty of it is worth the hard work Question (above) about my origin story of healing sister wounds I share the work of students and other lightworkers with my Instagram audience Lynn Tucknies credits me sharing her for being able to go full-time I contract when I talk about myself in this way I’m healing and getting better at seeing myself the way you see me It’s not common, but I also have other mediums co-teach and interview them I personally have never experienced the same generosity that I give other people I’ve been ghosted when being offered opportunities for TV shows, podcasts and magazines My intention for Spirit School was to create what I wish I had in my development The Spirit School Collective is an ecosystem that is supportive and non-competitive I have always had a long-term vision for my legacy My hope is that people who thrive in my spaces recreate that in their own communities One of my core values is reciprocity, which is lacking in this space I have a large and engaged audience who are drawn to my open way of sharing It has taken a lot of healing for me to work on my not enoughness My husband pointed out that my first mentor was taking advantage of me The pattern is that I do a lot for people and then am discarded Now that I am in a place of influence, people take advantage and don’t reciprocate After being on my podcast, bigger names haven’t shared it or talked to me again Recently, a guest I had on requested for their episode to air right away  I worked hard on making the episode interesting because I knew it would be a struggle When it came time to interview me, they provided no context and were scrolling on their phone They cut the interview short and said they would reschedule and then didn’t respond to me At first, I was too busy with the realtor and Spirit School for it to bother me I later realized how rude it was and have been unpacking my experience with mutuals I don’t feel threatened and have accepted that my audience may work with guests instead of me What is mine will not pass me, so I do not have scarcity in this work Spirit School is part of a vision to change the space of lightworking and mediumship People in the membership don’t act like that, and it is not an energetic match for those who do I feel that I am meant to be self-made without someone to help my career take off I desire for people coming after me to have a more collaborative experience I may never get to see the ripple effect that I have but that’s okay The return I receive is having people ask these questions and notice the difference I am not healed, but issues of worthiness and heartbreak have less influence over time I’ve always had a drive to work for what I wanted despite any obstacles Situations like this make me want to promote others and share the light more It has been the most magical month, but there has been an equal amount of negative too Declare that you will thrive, even in the shadow Ignore vanity metrics and focus on the audience you have now