TMF PREVIEW | Make Friends with Chris Voss

What if the fastest way to get a “yes”… is to stop asking for it? In this preview episode of Travis Makes Friends, Travis sits down with legendary FBI hostage negotiator Chris Voss to challenge one of the most ingrained habits in communication: chasing agreement. Instead, Chris introduces a counterintuitive approach—go for “no”—and explains why it actually builds trust faster, lowers resistance, and leads to better outcomes in both business and everyday life. Chris breaks down how “yes” has been overused—and even weaponized—leaving people guarded and skeptical. On the flip side, saying “no” makes people feel safe and in control. That subtle psychological shift can completely change the tone of a conversation. You’ll hear practical examples of how to reframe common questions, like swapping “Do you have a minute?” for “Is now a bad time?”—a small tweak that can instantly make people more open and engaged. The conversation also dives into the power of lowering expectations before making an ask. By “labeling” a request as inconvenient or even ridiculous upfront, you trigger a sense of relief when the actual ask turns out to be reasonable. Chris explains how this taps into natural human wiring—and why, when used ethically, it can strengthen collaboration rather than manipulate it. Travis and Chris explore how these techniques apply far beyond high-stakes negotiations—from customer service interactions to romantic relationships to everyday moments like ordering dinner or asking for help in a grocery store. At its core, this approach isn’t about winning at someone else’s expense—it’s about creating outcomes where both sides feel understood, respected, and satisfied. You’ll also hear why preparation matters more than talent in negotiation, how focusing too narrowly on a specific outcome can cause you to miss better opportunities, and why the best negotiators stay flexible across multiple “levers” of value—not just price. If you’ve ever felt uncomfortable with traditional sales tactics, struggled to ask for what you want, or wondered how to communicate more effectively without coming across as pushy, this preview will give you a completely new lens on influence and connection. Hit play to learn why the word “no” might be the most powerful tool you’re not using—and how a simple shift in language can transform the way you negotiate, connect, and build relationships.**Join the Black Swan Community with Chris Today!** Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices