To Mask or Unmask: Your Nervous System, Your Needs

If you’ve ever heard the advice “just be yourself” and felt frustrated by how generic it was, I want to share a framework that might be more helpful: masking vs. unmasking. We mask when we hide our authentic selves, in order to fit in or stay safe in unwelcoming environments. But masking takes a toll on the nervous system (because it’s exhausting to pretend to be someone you’re not). This is why it’s important to find spaces to UNmask as well. In this episode, I cover topics like:What masking looks like (ex: people-pleasing, downplaying your needs, & suppressing your body’s natural movements/stims)Why masking is a skill & survival strategy, especially for highly sensitive & neurodivergent folks (just like code-switching is a skill & cultural assimilation is a survival strategy)Why unmasking is essential for nervous system health, but why it might not be realistic to unmask all the time (depending on your identities, lived experiences, & personal circumstances)What it means to navigate your life with autonomy & choice, balancing safety & authenticityWhy unmasking is not a checklist, but rather an experiment in a new way of living4 types of unmasking: sensory, social, emotional, & values-based (with specific examples to apply to your own life)00:23 What is masking & why do we do it?02:37 What is UNmasking & why do we do it?08:13 What's the goal: to mask or unmask? (The answer is complicated)11:09 Types of Unmasking11:58 Sensory Unmasking14:32 Social Unmasking17:50 Emotional Unmasking18:57 Unmasking your Values20:49 How does unmasking impact the nervous system & brain?Quote: “When you feel ready to unmask, you can do so. If you don’t feel ready or comfortable or safe, masking is always an option too. For some people, maybe home is your safe space to unmask, but work is a place where you show up more buttoned up. Maybe you feel like you can be unmasked in your relationship with your partner, but not with certain family members. So I want to acknowledge all of those individual nuances.”🌿 About the HostLiz Zhou is a neurodivergent therapist of color, coach, & speaker based in Colorado (MA, LPC, she/her). She helps highly sensitive, neurodivergent adults & couples heal their nervous systems and connect with their authentic selves. Her specialties include: Brainspotting, EMDR, IFS, Psychedelic Integration, and Nervous System Intensives (deep-dive, accelerated therapy). Liz’s services are available online in Colorado & worldwide.🌿 Connect with Liz>> Subscribe to Liz’s Neurodivergent Letters (weekly email series for highly sensitive & neurodivergent folks).>> Follow on Instagram: @liz.holistic.therapist>> Visit my website: www.seasonsofgrowthcounseling.com🌿 Options to Work Together>> To work 1:1 with Liz (adults & couples): book an intro call here.>> To hire Liz for speaking & workshops: submit an inquiry form here.