文学微光 12 | 🍑 请以你的名字呼唤我：那个夏日，那份被铭记的痛与爱

🎧 节目导读当我们经历了一段刻骨铭心却无疾而终的感情，或者失去了一个至关重要的人时，我们常常会下意识地选择逃避。我们试图用忙碌麻痹自己，强迫自己不去想、不去痛，甚至假装一切都没发生过。我们以为，只要不再感到疼痛，就是痊愈。但如果我们为了快速“痊愈”，而把内心的感受连根拔起，这究竟是一种解脱，还是一种巨大的浪费？今晚，Mandy 陪你翻开安德烈·艾席蒙的感人小说《请以你的名字呼唤我》。让我们在那个充满阳光、桃子和蝉鸣的意大利夏日里，听听 Elio 的父亲对他说的那段话。那是一段关于如何面对心碎，如何诚实地对待自己身体和内心的，最温柔的告白。✨ Highlight 金句"We rip out so much of ourselves to be cured of things faster than we should that we go bankrupt by the age of thirty and have less to offer each time we start with someone new. But to feel nothing so as not to feel anything—what a waste!"🎙️ Full English ScriptHello, my dear friends. Welcome back to the quiet sanctuary of "Literary Glimmer." I am Mandy.Think back to a time when your heart was truly broken. Not just disappointed, but shattered. In those moments, what did you do? Did you let yourself cry? Or did you try to push the pain away as quickly as possible?We live in a culture that often treats sadness like a disease that needs to be cured immediately. We are told to "move on," to "get over it," to distract ourselves. We are afraid of suffering. So, we build walls. We harden our hearts. We tell ourselves that if we don't care too much, we won't get hurt again. But in doing so, we might accidentally kill the very thing that makes us capable of feeling deep joy.This delicate balance between joy and pain brings us to tonight’s reading: Call Me by Your Name by André Aciman. It is a story of a sudden, powerful, and fleeting summer romance between seventeen-year-old Elio and an older American student, Oliver.The passage I have chosen is perhaps one of the most moving pieces of fatherly advice in modern literature. It happens near the end of the summer, after Oliver has left. Elio is devastated. He is trying to hide his grief. But his father sees him. His father doesn't tell him to man up. He doesn't tell him it’s just a phase. Instead, he validates the profound beauty and the necessary pain of what Elio just experienced.Before we listen, let’s feel the weight of a few words. The first is Nurse. Usually, we nurse a sick person. But here, the father says to "nurse" the pain. Treat your sorrow gently, like a wound that needs care, not like an enemy to be destroyed. The second phrase is Snuff out. To snuff out a candle is to kill the flame completely. He warns Elio not to snuff out the flame of his feelings. And finally, Bankrupt. Not financially, but emotionally. If we tear out parts of ourselves to avoid pain, we will have nothing left to give when real love comes again.Now, imagine a quiet, sun-drenched study in an Italian villa. A father is sitting across from his heartbroken son. He speaks with deep understanding and profound regret for the things he himself missed out on. Let’s listen."You had a beautiful friendship. Maybe more than a friendship. And I envy you. In my place, most parents would hope the whole thing goes away, or pray that their sons land on their feet soon enough. But I am not such a parent.In your place, if there is pain, nurse it, and if there is a flame, don't snuff it out, don't be brutal with it. Withdrawal can be a terrible thing when it keeps us awake at night, and watching others forget us sooner than we'd want to be forgotten is no better. We rip out so much of ourselves to be cured of things faster than we should that we go bankrupt by the age of thirty and have less to offer each time we start with someone new. But to feel nothing so as not to feel anything—what a waste!Then let me say one more thing. It will clear the air. I may have come close, but I never had what you had. Something always held me back or stood in the way. How you live your life is your business. But remember, our hearts and our bodies are given to us only once. Most of us can't help but live as though we've got two lives to live, one is the mockup, the other the finished version, and then there are all those versions in between. But there's only one, and before you know it, your heart is worn out, and, as for your body, there comes a point when no one looks at it, much less wants to come near it.Right now there's sorrow. I don't envy the pain. But I envy you the pain.""But to feel nothing so as not to feel anything—what a waste!"We are so desperate to avoid suffering that we sometimes anesthetize ourselves against life itself. We treat our lives as a "mockup," a practice run, holding back our truest feelings because it feels safer.But Aciman reminds us that our hearts and bodies are given to us only once. The pain you feel after a loss is the exact measure of the love you experienced. You cannot have the profound joy without risking the crushing sorrow. They are two sides of the same coin.If you are hurting right now, don't rush to cure it. Don't rip out a piece of your soul just to feel better faster. Nurse the pain. Let the flame burn. Because the capacity to feel deeply—even when it hurts—is the truest sign that you are fully, beautifully alive.Goodnight, and let the glimmer light your way.在小宇宙查看该单集文稿