What If Holiday Traditions Served Your Values, Not Your Fears

Send us Fan MailEver wish holiday traditions felt lighter and more like you? We invited our colleague Tamar, an FBT therapist, to help us unpack the meaning of Hanukkah’s light and the realities of eight days filled with latkes, donuts, gatherings, and comments—and then we turn to Christmas, where office cookie swaps, seven fishes, and a packed social calendar can test even the most grounded routines. Together we get honest about food fears, sensory overload, and that pressure to “perform” at the table, then trade it for values, boundaries, and practical support.We explore what makes Hanukkah unique: customs that are beloved but not required, space to light candles and sing without forcing eight nights of fried food, and the power of modeling calm participation for kids. Tamar shares planning strategies for pacing the week, communicating needs, and choosing where to show up fully. We normalize the physical reality of richer food and busier schedules and offer scripts to sidestep diet talk. For students and adults, we outline how to use multiple supports, keep a regular fueling rhythm, and reduce dread with simple, repeatable plans.Shifting to Christmas, we talk about managing back-to-back events, navigating seafood-heavy menus, and supporting ARFID or sensory sensitivities without turning the table into a high-stakes exposure. We explain when exposures help and when they should wait, how to build a plate that fits you, and how to tap into values—connection, joy, tradition—without sacrificing recovery. We close with two actionable takeaways: accept that holiday routines will be different and choose one act of self-care as a gift to yourself.If this conversation helped, follow the show, share it with someone who needs it, and leave a quick review so more listeners can find us. Your support helps us keep bringing thoughtful, stigma-free conversations to the table.Show notes:Trigger warning: this show is not medical, nutrition, or mental health treatment and is not a replacement for meeting with a Registered Dietitian, Licensed Mental Health Provider, or any other medical provider. You can find resources for how to find a provider, as well as crisis resources, in the show notes. Listener discretion is advised.Resource links:ANAD: https://anad.org/NEDA: https://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org/NAMI: https://nami.org/homeAction Alliance: https://theactionalliance.org/NIH: https://www.nimh.nih.gov/How to find a provider: https://map.nationaleatingdisorders.org/https://www.psychologytoday.com/ushttps://www.healthprofs.com/us/nutritionists-dietitians?tr=Hdr_BrandSuicide & crisis awareness hotline: call 988 (available 24/7)Eating Disorder hotline: call or text 800-931-2237 (Phone line is available Monday-Thursday 11 am-9 pm ET and Friday 11 am-5 pm ET; text line is available Monday-Thursday 3-6 pm ET and Friday 1-5 pm ET)If you are experiencing a psychiatric or medical emergency, please call 911 or go to your nearest emergency room.Support the show