When A Skillful Coach Meets Emotion
from Change Your Thinking, Change Your Life Hosted by Michelle Burkhard
What if the emotion is real, but the story attached to itisn’t the only story available? Our coachee’s employee is leaving, and she feels like she failed. But “she is leaving” is a fact. “I failed” is the meaning she has attached to that fact. In today’s episode, Michelle explores what happens whenemotion meets the Skillful Coach. By noticing language, separating facts from meaning, exploring responsibility, and gently identifying patterns, we can help someone untangle what they are experiencing without trying to talk them out oftheir feelings. Sometimes the goal isn’t to help someone feel better. It’s to help them feel more accurately. And sometimes that shift can turn “I failed” into something much more truthful: “I’m sad this ended differently than I hoped.” Questions or comments? I’d love to hear from you! [email protected] Want to grow your confidence, skill, and capacity as acoach? The next Coaching Academy begins in January. Learn more and join us at CA.GrowBy1.com. Reflection Questions How could you help a coachee separate what happened fromwhat they believe it means? What might you notice in phrases such as “I failed” or “Ishould have done more”? How could you help the coachee distinguish theirresponsibilities from another person’s choices? How might you invite exploration of a pattern withoutdeciding its meaning for the coachee? How would you know whether exploring an emotion is serving the current coaching goal?
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