The Hidden History of Women's Desire: Why So Many of us Struggle to Know What we Want

Why do so many us struggle to answer one simple question: What do you really want? Join me in this episode as I explore the hidden history of women's desire through the lenses of anthropology, neuroscience, feminist history, embodiment and sexology. Together we'll trace how culture, patriarchy, religion, economics and invisible emotional labour have shaped women's relationship with their bodies, boundaries, pleasure and self-trust. This is not simply a conversation about sexuality. It's about sovereignty, flourishing and the conditions that allow women to truly come home to themselves. So if you've ever wondered why saying no feels difficult, why self-abandonment feels familiar, or why your deepest desires can feel so hard to hear, this episode offers a compassionate and deeply researched new perspective. Topics explored: Women's history and the evolution of patriarchy Desire, embodiment and self-trust The neuroscience of adaptation and nervous system safety Invisible emotional labour and motherhood Rest, pleasure and human flourishing Feminist thinkers including Gerda Lerner, Silvia Federici, bell hooks, Adrienne Rich, Carol Gilligan, Tricia Hersey and Adrienne Maree Brown Why healing is ecological, not merely individual.   If this conversation moved you, please leave an up-to 5 star review and rating on Apple Podcasts, it's a free and meaningful way you can support this work.    === VILATES •Website: https://www.vilates.com/     •Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/vilates_/   •Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/3fs2KlkHNzICKAg2crZSMB      •Apple Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-ecology-of-intimacy-podcast/id1772602980    === . . . . . . Disclaimer This podcast is presented solely for educational and entertainment purposes. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, medical practitioner, professional coach, psychotherapist, or any other qualified professional. We shall in no event be held liable to any party for any reason arising directly or indirectly for the use or interpretation of the information presented in this podcast. Copyright 2026 © Vilates, Pty. Ltd - All rights reserved.