A2D - From Addict to Disciple

How do you handle the changing winds in recovery? Today we look at various winds that can affect our journey of recovery: contrary winds, hindering winds, head winds, driving winds, etc. We are reminded by an African proverb that "The wind does not break a tree that can bend." We are also reminded that "A tree that refuses to dance will be made to do so by the wind."

Today's episode is the first of two parts in which we look at what keeps you anchored in recovery. Outlining the various aspects of the definition and the purpose of an anchor. And looking at how each of those aspects can be a benefit to our recovery as well as a detriment to our progress in recovery. The pros and cons. Next week we'll look at the winds in recovery.

In today's episode we look at Socrates quote "Strong minds discuss ideas, average minds discuss events, and weak minds discuss people." What are you discussing in your daily conversations? What emotions and feelings do you have about people and events that keep your mind weak. And how do these things weaken your recovery. Take an inventory of "What You Talkin' About?"

Deepak Chopra said "Balance is the secret ingredient to a happy and meaningful life." In this episode we look at that and five other quotes to build our own plan to create balance in our life. We talk about the balance between work and pleasure, between giving and receiving and between seriousness and levity. Get out your journal and start taking action ideas as you build balance in your life by finding it inside.

Today's episode looks at the three stages of relapse: emotional relapse, mental relapse and finally physical relapse. We examine ways to recognize problem areas in stages 1 and 2 which result in physical relapse and how to ask for help and intervention to avoid stage 3. The key is continuously improving in our recovery everyday. No interruptions. No hiccups. No weekends off.

Where are you in your recovery? In your life situation? Do you know what your "enough is enough" is? Do you have the courage to rise up and overcome it? Or you like so many guys in recovery who are paralyzed by reluctance, ignorance or fear? I like the quote from The Awakening "Sometimes you reach to a point when enough is enough. Sometimes you have to just be done, just done and nothing else."

In today's episode we look at muscle memory in recovery. Taylor Mali, an American poet and educator, said "The memory is a muscle, the more you use it, the stronger it gets." Join us as we look at four key aspects of this muscle memory: consistency, positivity, steadfastness and endurance. In closing we see that even courage can be a key aspect of our muscle memory for recovery.

Are you convinced that there is no way that you will ever be one to be totally free from addiction? What keeps you resigned to this negative view of your future? In today's episode we look at five areas of loss that can keep us stuck in negativity. Then we flip the script and discuss the "I Can" attitudes that usher in the feelings of Why Not Me? Doubt doesn't have to disappear, but we need to recognize it and replace it with confidence!

Today's walkabout episode takes us to Dire Straits Park. We'll look at difficult, desperate and dangerous times that you may have faced in your addiction. Then we'll see what others wrote in the journals about how they survived extreme conditions, made some extreme choices but found their way through the Dire Straits to sail forward in recovery. The quote by American actor Joshua Graham rings true "I survived because the fire inside me burned brighter than the fire around me."

Today's episode is the last walkabout in Change Park. This one is on the In The Moment Trail. This trail focuses on staying in the moment, embracing the moment and enjoying the moment, rather than reacting to it. The 5-4-3-2-1 exercise is introduced as a powerful tool to stay in the moment and create a "muscle memory" that we can utilize at any moment.

Are you currently going through a transition or change this year? Perhaps your time in rehab is coming to a close and you need to find a place to live. Maybe you have a job opportunity in another town, state or province. This episode looks at living where you have an opportunity for the best quality of life in 3 aspects: health, happiness and hope. And if you are not moving, you're settled this is an excellent episode to focus on improving your quality of life where you are.

In today's episode I share messages from five listeners who have contacted to basically say this same thing: Help! I Keep On Relapsing. You will learn a lot from their transparency about the struggle to stay clean and sober without a slip or relapse every 3 months or without findind a new "acceptable" addiction as their comforterg

BOGSAT is the acronym for a Bunch of Guys Sitting Around a Table. This bunch of guys are typically just killing time, having a cigarette or a cup of coffee, checking messages or playing a game on their phone. So it's not a group meeting. It 's a casual, unproductive time with no real focus. In this episode we look at BOGSAT and how we can change it to BOGGAT a Bunch of Guys Growing Around a Table.

Today we are doing another walkabout in Change Park. This time we'll walk on The Game is On Trail. Are you someone who felt that as your family tried to change you it was time to manipulate them to enable you? So as Peter Chenge said "People don't resist change. They resist being changed!" If that's you then this episode is for you.

In today's episode we look at feedback from guys in various stages in recovery. They share their thoughts on where they are going, how did they get there, etc. A key quote we conclude with is by Iyanla Vanzant "Planning is the only way to keep yourself on track. Plan your moments to be joyous. Plan your days to be filled with peace. Plan your life to be an experience of growth. When you know where you are going, the universe will clear a path for you."

Today's episode is a walkabout in Change Park on the Can You See I've Changed Trail. This trail takes us on the difficult, often messy, part of recovery when we have changed but our friends and family don't see it. They don't believe what we're saying. Maybe we've changed, but their still the same. The first quote we'll find on this trail is by Canadian writer Robin Sharma "Change is hard at first, messy in the middle and gorgeous at the end."

A Japanese proverb that goes back to Samurai warrior time is "After victory, tighten your helmet cord." This emphasizes that we may have won a battle but that doesn't mean the war is over. In this episode we look at seven ways that we can utilize this proverb as a guide for us in recovery. As stated by Kambei Shimada in Akira Kurosawa's "The Seven Samurai," "When you think you're safe is precisely when you're the most vulnerable.

Today's episode is a walkabout though I'm Free Park. Are you truly free from addiction? Can you even visualize being free? Friedrich Nietzsche Said "Freedom is the will to be responsible to ourselves." Enjoy this walkabout as we look and these questions and so much more.

I want to thank my friend Matthew Toth for his insight into the importance of self forgiveness in recovery. Here's a list of 7 points that Matt views as vital as you walk the path of self forgiveness. You can learn more about Matt by searching him on Facebook. He posts often about his walk in recovery and calls ir ODAATwithMatt.

How do you get to the point in your recovery to be able to say "Nothing's Going to Stop Me"? What measuring stick are you using to determine that you are ready to return to community? In this episode we look at the stuff in our thoughts and the voices that we hear which make us unsure if we are ready. It's time now to sort them out so you know that Nothing's Going to Stop your recovery!

How do you handle shocking news that you receive in your recovery? Does it fuel old thoughts of using to nunb the pain? Do you want to simply give up and believe this confirms that you'll never make it? Who do you trust to be able to talk about it? Colin Powell is quoted as saying "Bad news isn't wine. It doesn't improve with age." Join us in this episode as we look at learning how to process news that we've always numbed, escaped or stuffed.

Have you ever left a social gathering without saying goodbye? What were your reasons? In addiction, we are experts in Irish goodbyes! How do you think people feel when we disappear without a goodbye? When we stay away for days and never check in? So whether you are the one who gave the Irish goodbye, or if you have been the receiver of one, or if you've been ghosted by someone on social media, this epieosde is for you!

If we expect recovery to be transactional , we just focus on closing the deal and get on with our life. But it's not a quick sale! Recovery is transitional where we build relationships and make lifelong commitments to the journey. What is involved in this journey? Listen to today's episode to find out.

Is it time for you to deal with your stuff? Those negative feelings, emotions and memories that you suppressed, stuffed in a box and put in the attic! It may have felt like life became easier when you did that because you didn't have to face that stuff everyday. But those boxes of stuff in the attic of your mind may be the very things stand between you and the life you want to be living. It's time to clean out your attic!

Are you actively working on your healing? Or are you just focused on getting clean and sober? What if the thing that kept you in addiction was the pain of your wound? What if your hurt was controlling your behavior more than your drug of choice? These questions and more on tiday's episode.

The Japanese term "Shoshin" means a beginner's mindset. Too often I meet guys struggling in recovery who have closed their mind to new ideas. It's like they are the experts, even though they keep relapsing! If we can set aside our old assumptions and ideas we , like a beginner, can pick up a new nugget or wisdom every day. Shunryu Suzuki said, "In the beginner's mind there are many possibilities, in the expert's mind there are few."

How do you hold that conversation with someone struggling in addiction or recovery? How do you build that relationship when you see the same person every week at outreach or in a support group? The foundation is learning how to offer help and hope. We all have something to offer help in the moment to someone in need. And we all can be carriers of hope to someone who is caught in hopelessness. In this episode we look at the NEED method to holding those conversations.

This is a group episode with our guys in recovery from Australia, South Africa and the US. Their insight, wisdom and experience is awesome as they react to Deepak Chopra's quote "Be happy for no reason, like a child. If you are happy for a reason, you're in trouble, because the reason can be taken from you." So how do we share our journey to find that childlike happiness with people just starting the journey of recovery?

When I'm working in rehabs I often hear questions like "How do I know I'm really making it in recovery?" "How do I know I'm ready to reintegrate into society, a job, family?" My answer is, "Have you found greatness in recovery?" In this episode we look at what greatness in recovery is, what signposts should I see along the journey of greatness and how do I get started? We close today's episode with a quote from Bob Marley "The greatness of a man is not in how much wealth he acquires, but in his integrity and his ability to affect those around him positively."

I close every podcast episode with these words. What do they mean to me? How can living these words be your way to develop your support system in recovery? How do we look for people, places and things that are safe and that keep us resilient in recovery? Get out your journal and take notes as you listen.

This is part two on Fear of the Unknown. In this part we look at how fear of the unknown paralyzes us, makes us freeze up, or become stagnant. And the result is we stay stuck, often blaming others as we miss opportunities for growth because of fear. I want to encourage all of the listeners to pick one of the quotes you identify with or that resonates with you and discuss it witha friend or in group.

Has fear of the unknown in recovery, reintegration into society or reconciliation KEPT YOU in addiction? Or maybe it has paralyzed you form transitioning to the next phase in life. Perhaps it has made you a career rehab guy. Even though you aren't growing, you're in a safe or comfortable place. Today's episode is the first of a two part look at this topic.

Thanks for joining us as we go on a walkabout through Remorse in Recovery Park. Are you a pro at getting clean and sober but remorse always results in relapse? Are you struggling to deal with the havoc your created in your family? Do thoughts of the lives you've shattered keep you awake at night? Then this episode is for you and for the friends and family affected by your addiction.

Are you comfortable in your own skin today? If not, what are you uncomfortable about? How do you begin the journey of being comfortable in your own skin? What signs are there that will show that you're getting there? What does this have to do with recovery? These questions and more in today's episode. Enjoy and share.

I had been thinking of an alternative title, Things I Never Said Keep Me Sick!, so this episode looks at how to tell our story to find healing and be able to rewrite our story. Author Niyan S. Dizaye encourages us to "Embrace your own story, light up the dark, conquer your fears - take the journey to your next level. Win the battle against the end." I hope this podcast motivates you to do just that.

This is a group episode with input from six guys in recovery from South Africa, Australia and the US. They share their answers to the question, "If you're focused on your past, how can you fuel your future?" That's a good question for all of us in recovery from addiction, from abuse or from any trauma in our life. Share this episode with any of your friends that come to mind as you listen.

Today we go on a walkabout in this park and reflect on several quotes about life as a game. Albert Einstein said "Life is just like a game. First you have to learn the rules of the game, and then play it better than anyone else." Placido Domingo said "I feel like a little boy who is constantly offered new toys." Napoleon Bonaparte warned "Men are ruled by toys." I'm sure you'll enjoy this walkabout as we look at these quotes and more.

In this episode we take another look at taking our thoughts captive before we give ourselves permission to relapse. The Buddhist parable of the two arrows says that when misfortune comes, two arrows are flying at us. The first is the event, the second is our reaction. And the second is optional! How do we stop clinging to the pain and learn to chill out?

Today's episode is a walkabout through Never Again Park. In this walkabout I'm joined by several women who have been affected by the addiction of their husband or baby's father. The focus will be all of the emotions that arise as they deal with the situation that just as they decided to never let that guy ever hurt them again, he has the nerve to say he wants to make amends!

Have you said "I'm never going to relapse?" What makes you feel invincible to the triggers and temptations that have caused millions of guys before you to relapse? Let's look at what makes an invincible mindset and how to apply it to our recovery and our life. Remember, Joseph Stalin said "History shows that there are no invincible armies."

Do you feel like you have reached burnout in your recovery? Do you find yourself battling with mental, physical or emotional exhaustion on a regular basis? If that's you it may be time to shift gears and focus on self-care. It's not good to reach the point where you say "I used to be sick and tired of being sick and tired in my addiction, now I feel stuck and tired in my recovery!"

We've all heard the idiom "Don't beat a dead horse!" Today we look at this saying and how it applies to our recovery. Why are you continuing to use ineffective strategies even though they aren't working for you? What can you do to restore enthusiasm and excitement to your recovery? Remember, you and you alone, are responsible for maintaining your energy in recovery.

We all have those unexpected moments in life when our sense of peace, joy, safety, stability vanishes. How do you handle those moments? Do you find yourself riddled with panic and fear? Today we look at how to withstand those moments, how to remain elastic and flexible, how to be calm in the midst of the storm. Martin Luther King Jr. said "The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy."

Many people in recovery struggle to deal with their anger issues. Family members sign them up for anger management and behavior modification classes. Today's episode talks us through how to dig deeper into this topic of out anger. Using an iceberg model we look at the things below the surface that we need to process and learn how to control before our anger controls us.

In today's episode I take a walk through Weekend Warrior Park with four friends who were weekend warrior alcoholics. The walk leads us to look at alcoholics who who started out as: 1) social drinkers, 2) conformist drinkers, 3) thrill seekers or 4) copers. By the end of the park we look at ways to become a Weekend Warrior for recovery

This is part 2 of the two episodes on closure. Today we look at the aspect of moving on. Moving forward, not just turning a page. Not focusing on what you left behind, but realizing you have the power to choose your future and the direction you will take to get there.

Today's episode is part 1 of two parts on the topic of closure. I believe it is crucial to make peace with our past or memories will continue to draw us back into relapse. In this podcast we look at aspects of closure and how to prepare ourself to move forward in life and recovery.

A client working on making amends said to me "I made a promise I couldn't keep no matter how hard I tried! I left them hurt and me with guilt and shame." Are you tired of the broken trust, damaged relationships, shredded hope and shattered dreams? In todays' episode we look at the impact of promises we've broken and how we can become someone who under promises and over delivers.

Today's episode looks at three quotes from the book Take the Stairs: 7 Steps to Achieving True Success by Rory Vaden. This is not a book review but I'll discuss the quotes from the standpoint of achieving success in recovery. We'll look at the critical aspects of the journey of recovery and how to choose the hard right thing over the easy wrong one.

Today's episode is a group session with my friends in recovery from the United States, South Africa and Australia. I'm sure you'll enjoy their openness and insight as they share their reactions to: "There's an anonymous quote that says 'We didn't come this far to just come this far.' How has your achieving recovery become a stepping stone for you to a lifestyle of perseverance and continuous improvement?"