Americans Watching The Footy

We've got our NPR voices ready for one of our absolute favorite bits… but that's just a snippet of a marathon episode about a round that started off as well as any in recent memory, included a lot of personal disappointment for both hosts, and ended… better than lukewarm.

Around the league we go again in a week that saw utter disappointment from our two teams, mind-boggling decisions from officials in more ways than one, and a few sterling performances that deserve 3 or 10 votes depending on what award you're thinking of.

Alternate Title: "Kindly Deeds Done for Free." Both come from Ethan.We continue our discussion of Round 6 with the final two games of Behind Saturday. Sunday was like a sandwich with high-quality meat on bread that was not up to the task. Heck, maybe even the bread was a little off, because it was an xScore pisser. Enjoy!

Round 6 was so full that we decided to split up our recap, instead of having a marathon episode of even greater length than our earlier ones this season. The Blues are the Blues and of course Collingwood got involved in another after-siren finish, but that isn’t even the main story from Thursday. Friday’s rivalries took on very different tones in Geelong and Sydney, while Single-Digit Saturday began to take shape on the Gold Coast. There are plenty of youngsters’ performances to celebrate throughout… and then we suddenly got the funniest Tribunal / Appeals Board news possible right as we thought we’d wrap up.

Gather Round 4.0 is in the books, and we hope it (mostly) sticks in SA. The result of the Saturday night "main event" wasn't surprising, but it leaves us with lots of questions about how dire the Bulldogs' situation really is. Plus, Alex Pearce did it again, the Blues can't get out of their own way, and the Kassel Cup had another predictable outcome.

This is much more than your regular recap: we're truly going international this time! Ethan has launched a brilliant initiative, and Benjamin is completely on board. Plus, our commiserations on both our teams losing in very different embarrassing ways, and all sorts of fun with derpy moments and coaches that look absolutely lost.

I mean, most of footy doesn't have to do with that. Neither does someone wiping blood on an opponent, though, and that happened this week. Tristan Xerri will make us remember this round for a while, but so will West Coast's Jobe Shanahan, and so too will the Blues and their legendary collapse.

Spring has arrived in America, and the first Eagles win has arrived in Perth — both worthy causes for celebration. Fourth quarters turned every which way in Round 2 and occupy much of our focus, particularly in the round bookends and the Showground tilt. …Oh, and Essendon got blasted on the oval athletically, and now off the oval verbally.

So much for noises of affirmation or dissent… what about when you need to express something but don't know what to use?Thankfully, we've got plenty to express after a full round of footy. The Thursday opener reminded all doubters how a season should truly start, while the Cats shook off a rough first 5 quarters of the season to finish strong down the highway. And who'd have thought the Des and Saints would deliver peak entertainment in the year 2026?

We're back at long last, ready for another season! Benjamin has gotten into teaching, and he and Ethan are knee-deep into state basketball playoffs, but the footy consumes all. Find out our initial thoughts on new rules, takeaways from the first five games, and our picks for round awards.

The Lions reigned supreme, much to Ethan's chagrin and somewhat to Benjamin's surprise. We discuss our different Grand Final viewing experiences and tie up some season-long narratives.

Not sorry, says Ethan! The largest prelim crowd in 54 years saw Victoria's best rivalry (no, we're not biased, why?) go the Cats' way, with a healthy helping of Dangerfield. The next night, an all-feline Grand Final was confirmed. Keep listening for our postmortems of the prelim losers, as well as a healthy dose of Americana.

And then there were four. Drama decided to take a pass on the semi-finals, but we've still got plenty to break down. Plus, we look at other codes, marveling at the oddities in multiple forms of football.

Well, that was… fun? If you were a completely neutral party, I'd definitely say Saturday's eliminators were. However, given our respective interests, we hold reservations. Ethan also turned against a (former) favorite of his — learn who it was and more here!

With the home-and-away season done and dusted, it's time to look back at those clubs sitting on the sidelines in September. We begin to give the losers their due in this annual two-part event!

With the home-and-away season done and dusted, it's time to look back at those clubs sitting on the sidelines in September. We begin to give the losers their due in this annual two-part event!

Yeah, a couple clubs did some obvious things to actively avoid victory here in the final round. Benjamin anticipated the Bulldogs' failures, while Ethan certainly didn't. We also go into some Australian connections in college football as that season gets going too!

With just one round to go, 10 teams are mathematically out of it… yet their headlines on and off the oval remain as entertaining as those of the finals contenders. We celebrate expected and unsung heroes alike across the league, and Benjamin crams as many references to one band as possible into one game breakdown.

We're back! …No, not just with a new episode. We're both back home! Ethan's returned from his pilgrimage, and Benjamin's started his new job. It's been a very dramatic week for both of us, and the footy definitely added to those feelings… even if Ethan didn't see much of the excitement in person.

Ethan did the thing. His first visit to Kardinia Park was the centerpiece of his whole footy pilgrimage, because of the interactions he had post-match. Round 21 spaced out its drama pretty well, though our older host only saw one of the big results in person. Listen for more of his takes on the live footy experience and various other Aussie experiences!

Ethan's footy pilgrimage is underway! He's already taken in 3 games in as many states, so listen in to hear all about his inaugural Australian experience. From back in California, Benjamin inquires and reflects on his own unique setting for watching the most insane ending of the year.Sections0:00:00 Intro / Ethan’s There!0:08:15 HAW v CAR0:13:45 ESS v WB0:20:05 GWS v SYD0:27:37 GC v BRI0:35:46 FRE v WCE0:42:21 NM v GEE0:49:21 ADE v PA0:55:46 RIC v COL1:00:13 STK v MEL1:12:01 Awards

As much as Benjamin's Eagles want redemption and escape, it's nowhere in sight. Thankfully, the other WA team can lift our collective mood. We also got some key results involving "Australia's Florida" to discuss in this extremely unique episode!

Ravioli, ravioli… yup, the Suns have a lot of things figured out. Elsewhere, we finally see a statement win we were hoping for, jinxing each other in the process. Our teams didn't provide the points, but at least Benjamin sees a few positives…Sections0:00:00 Intro0:05:47 CAR v BRI0:15:05 GC v COL0:25:46 WB v ADE0:37:23 GWS v GEE0:45:24 RIC v ESS0:55:07 FRE v HAW1:05:29 MEL v NM1:15:27 STK v SYD1:24:04 PA v WCE1:32:01 Awards

The reigning premiers are back as we knew them, and that's a highlight of what was largely a round that conformed to expectations. A key tagging call shaped the one game that was considered up for grabs, while we also saw a stack of award-worthy plays.Sections0:00:00 Intro0:04:11 NM v WB0:14:24 CAR v COL0:26:47 WCE v GWS0:38:12 ESS v GC0:46:57 GEE v RIC0:57:53 BRI v PA1:08:57 STK v HAW1:18:54 SYD v FRE1:28:51 ADE v MEL1:38:11 Awards

“Man down” — or really “men down” — is a common thread among at least two of the clubs who had byes in Round 16, if not more. Still, three are firmly in the finals picture! …and then there’s the fourth club, who are staring down 8,000 days without a finals win.

Graffiti suggests keeping one coach, while Benjamin demands another’s sacking. Round 16 might’ve actually been “Geezer Round,” with how so many older players shone through… though a valiant Eagles challenge and a flying Viking (who was somehow snubbed for Rising Star) probably did enough to cancel that out. …Oh, and fuck Tom Lynch.Sections0:00:00 Intro0:03:11 PA v CAR0:14:37 SYD v WB0:30:08 GC v MEL0:38:23 HAW v NM0:46:37 COL v WCE0:58:39 RIC v ADE1:13:34 FRE v STK1:25:15 Awards

Sometimes players just look like they're possessed against their former teams. Nobody represents that better than someone who had a bye in Round 15. Also: missing letters show up at last, and a eulogy for a should-be Hall of Famer.

The Orange Team’s xScore defiance seems… supernatural, and Ethan has a theory. Benjamin, meanwhile, just enjoyed his Suns hate-watch and the lack of an Eagles game. Both hosts were also proven right about North!Sections0:00:00 Intro / Cricket Talk0:08:01 FRE v ESS0:16:05 GEE v BRI0:26:31 CAR v NM0:38:58 Rugby Talk0:46:39 PA v SYD0:55:59 COL v STK1:05:41 GWS v GC1:22:30 WB v RIC1:31:15 Awards

It’s the third of our five batches of mid-season check-ins for teams on byes. One of the clubs off for Round 14 are already “fallen cold and dead,” and we can make the case for a second… but all four are among of the year’s bigger newsmakers.

Let me tell you something, brother. The Orange Team have shown us the future, and it's scary for everyone who dares to challenge their forward 50. We needed that excitement and high quality, because Round 14 was starving for it otherwise — especially after a Friday night flop.Sections0:00:00 Intro / MLC0:05:01 STK v WB0:14:02 HAW v ADE0:26:00 BRI v GWS0:38:24 ESS v GEE0:48:28 NM v FRE0:58:33 PA v MEL1:10:10 WCE v CAR1:15:05 Awards

Bye time means midseason check-ins, because every team deserves discussion time each week. Both the teams who rested in Round 13 have clear trouble winning when their couple top guys are down. We fold our annual aesthetic rankings into this progress report too.

We largely took in this round together, and on Eastern Time while in Ohio. That meant we got to se each other react to our favorite clubs, for better (Ethan) or worse (Benjamin). Round 13’s action meant we had reason to bring back our Indian food comparisons in full.Sections0:00:00 Intro0:03:14 WB v HAW0:14:32 ADE v BRI0:23:06 RIC v SYD0:27:14 GEE v GC0:38:10 GWS v PA0:46:45 NM v WCE0:56:05 CAR v ESS1:04:47 MEL v COL1:16:55 Awards

Short round, longer rabble… I think that’s how it goes? It was a weird week where the games we didn’t to expect to deliver did, and vice versa. Stick around for a lengthy breakdown of the Kassel Cup between our respective favorite clubs!Sections0:00:00 Intro0:03:39 BRI v ESS0:15:33 COL v HAW0:25:47 GC v FRE0:36:43 GWS v RIC0:48:06 SYD v ADE0:56:59 MEL v STK1:06:53 WCE v GEE1:28:10 Awards

We’re going through the bye rounds, which means we pause to talk about the teams on said byes in these Progress Report episodes. It’s nearly all blue this time, with a smattering of teal.

To call Round 11 front-loaded might be accurate… particularly if you're talking about its opening fixture. Benjamin rode the highs and lows of footy alongside some baseball.

Sir Doug Nicholls Round is one of our favorite parts of every season Ethan and Benjamin are playing catch-up after a busy weekend in San Diego, but both can rejoice in their own teams' victories… though both came at a cost.Sections0:00:00 Intro / Ethan’s Itinerary0:07:40 GC v HAW0:14:20 SYD v CAR0:21:10 COL v ADE0:26:39 PA v GEE0:36:13 GWS v FRE0:44:15 Aside…0:47:52 WB v ESS0:56:58 RIC v NM1:05:44 BRI v MEL1:14:08 WCE v STK1:24:54 Awards

The round of our footy lives! Seriously, did Leo XIV bless this past weekend? Ethan argues not, since both our teams lost… but the compelling nature of the whole slate (sans one game's final quarter) still has Benjamin curious about divine intervention into Australia's game. Yet, amid all of the gripping action, our main character didn't play in the round at all.

In which Ethan bestows a new nickname, Benjamin laments the state of Western footy, and both engage in discussion on the round's biggest star: the construction worker behind the goal in Ballarat. (The Geelong one from 2022 was better).

In which Benjamin has his least favorite day of footy yet. No, really, Sunday was truly awful for him. We take solace in re-emergences of sorts and the strength of the traditional Anzac games, while lamenting authority in multiple manners.Sections0:00:00 Intro0:02:13 MEL v RIC0:09:19 COL v ESS0:18:00 FRE v ADE0:29:19 STK v BRI0:38:57 PA v NM0:49:48 GWS v WB1:02:35 GC v SYD1:11:11 CAR v GEE1:27:19 HAW v WCE1:36:57 Awards

10 PM has taken on a whole new meaning in the footy world… *sigh* But there’s also so much else to talk about from Easter Round! From a Good Friday massacre to the Bont rising (and healing the injured?) on Sunday, to the immense drama of Monday, we rode the rollercoaster like you all did this past week — and Ethan might have felt it more than others.Sections0:00:00 Intro0:05:18 BRI v COL0:14:13 NM v CAR0:25:47 WCE v ESS0:34:17 MEL v FRE0:45:24 ADE v GWS0:54:22 RIC v GC1:08:04 SYD v PA1:15:09 WB v STK1:30:11 GEE v HAW1:45:50 Awards

Gather Round has come and gone for the third time. It opened with chaotic good Mitch Hinge and the Danger Zone, and it closed with a Port victory marked with pure personal catharsis. In between, we saw plenty of defenders pushing downfield for intercepts and more (Moose goal!), and some real baby-making footy in that Saturday sickos doubleheader.Sections0:00:00 Intro0:02:01 ADE v GEE0:13:01 COL v SYD0:19:00 NM v GC0:27:20 CAR v WCE0:32:17 WB v BRI0:42:40 MEL v ESS0:52:37 RIC v FRE0:57:23 STK v GWS1:03:52 PA v HAW1:17:21 Awards

This isn’t our most ballyhooed episode, but we had fun throwing in our favorite sound bite wherever we could. Learn more about Rossball Mk. III, Fox Sports’ new footy montage, and shrimp fried Bice as we go through the last of the early bye rounds. Also, the connection between Sabrina Carpenter and the AFL has only deepened this past week.Sections0:00:00 Intro0:02:31 COL v CAR0:17:29 GEE v MEL0:30:21 GC v ADE0:41:27 RIC v BRI0:51:11 NM v SYD0:59:56 GWS v WCE1:10:10 PA v STK1:20:55 FRE v WB1:31:58 Awards

It's the nickname we never knew needed… or even existed! Benjamin and Ethan saw their fair mix of comedy and tragedy during Round 3. Both their teams disappointed in different ways, while Carlton fell into an open sewer again, and Adelaide and their FTW trio kept on rolling.Sections0:00:00 Intro0:08:46 ESS v PA0:16:59 CAR v WB0:26:23 MEL v GC0:38:44 STK v RIC0:45:23 HAW v GWS0:55:24 BRI v GEE1:08:05 ADE v NM1:15:08 WCE v FRE1:23:08 Awards

The title is Ethan's answer to a player comp Benjamin was seeking for weeks leading into Round 2. As we start retooling the show a bit, hear our thoughts on state-level rehab assignments, Christian Petracca's analogy with Terrelle Pryor, and the great goal song debate.Sections0:00:00 Intro0:04:09 CAR v HAW0:13:58 WB v COL0:21:25 ESS v ADE0:27:46 PA v RIC0:33:23 STK v GEE0:48:04 BRI v WCE0:54:35 NM v MEL1:12:20 FRE v SYD1:20:30 Awards

It really feels like footy's back now, but we still have a hard time believing Thursday's monumental Tiger upset — and one of the events therein. Plenty of firsts of the year (equinoxes) to discuss, so let's not waste any time!…Well, maybe not waste as much?Ehh, no promises.Sections0:00:00 Intro0:02:12 RIC v CAR0:17:10 HAW v ESS0:26:06 GEE v FRE0:38:40 SYD v BRI0:50:13 COL v PA0:56:28 WB v NM1:11:43 ADE v STK1:18:55 MEL v GWS1:25:58 WCE v GC1:33:02 Awards

It's Round 1 in Australia, and it's state basketball championship weekend in California. That's great and all, except for Ethan having to miss Geelong's opener. The Dan Houston Cup is on because Collingwood gets preferential scheduling… and for some reason, there's a "Jack-off" Benjamin wants to see.Sections00:00 Intro03:48 RIC v CAR10:02 HAW v ESS15:58 GEE v FRE22:10 SYD v BRI28:58 COL v PA34:28 WB v NM37:42 ADE v STK43:47 MEL v GWS48:49 WCE v GC54:26 Predictions

Was it a mini-Gather Round? If so, NSW got through their hosting with mixed results. The rainy opener was honestly the cleaner game, while the nightcap provided a surprise bludgeoning and an eerie reminder of one untouchable tenet of Australia's game.Sections00:00 Intro03:54 SYD v HAW18:32 GWS v COL34:38 Awards

Fruit might not be flying in Sydney, but a pair of Sherrins will be as the AFL season finally gets underway! Both brothers want to know: when will it really feel like footy’s back? They’re also on the outlook for multiple forms of Pez.Sections00:00 Intro09:06 SYD v HAW20:28 GWS v COL28:19 News / Predictions

Benjamin grew up with a lisp, but Ethan now has one too? What's going on here? As we wrap up our team-by-team investigations, find out about a novel idea for rushing the field, and see if the definition of "Nepo Baby" is stretched a bit too far.

Our team-by-team previews (in random order) continue! Ethan talks hate-watching, Benjamin provides a Kennedy-esque quote, and prior guest Derek helps answer a vital question.