PODCAST · news
And the world stood silent
by Amanda Perri
I haven’t fact checked a fucking thing.
Episodes
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If y’all got sleepy eyes, then say that.
I still got it though. Age is a number unless it’s a minor, then you have a problem.
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Y’all are humans, God said that.
Let’s work towards Authentic. I said what I said.
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If y’all humans, then say that.
Maybe we do need black mirror social scores. Communism doesn’t have to be a bad thing. Life’s a process.
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If y’all live in this reality ,then say that.
This not your reality baby girl, this is the option being handed to you. Know what you want and get it.
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Do y’all explore caves?
Sometimes the message isn’t what you thought.
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If everything is about race, then say that.
Cause y’all messing up the definitions.
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If y’all ever been on a dating app, then say that.
Nobody is really out here meeting on Christian mingle.
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If y’all ever got humbled, then say that.
I ain’t about to stay tripped up.
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If y’all enjoy life, then say that.
Would you even know if you made it?
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If y’all got free will, you can say that.
See what I did there?
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If y’all take notes, then say that.
I won monopoly and the game of life as a kid. Chutes and ladders and mouse trap taught me the streets. I’m not here for the bullshit. Uno bitch.
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If y’all never knew love like this before, then say that.
I’ll never go hungry waiting on you.
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If y’all knew the consequences, then say that.
If y’all did a dna test, say your percent then.
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If y’all live on instagram, then say that.
Stop polluting our beaches.
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If y’all went to Puerto Rico, what part though.
Why do I see the worst parts of everything.
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Remember the election, I got you.
To all the texts I never sent.
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If y’all are toxic, then say that.
Stop telling me the same story.
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If y’all think I’m wrong, then say that.
I’m out, see ya around.
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If y’all don’t feel loved, then say that.
Imagine hating me and I’m trying to teach you how to love yourself.
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If y’all was thinking it, then say that.
Condolences to the victims and their families. However, let’s keep this idea alive.
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If y’all kids can’t handle it, then say that.
You should know what your kid can and can not do, it’s your kid…
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If y’all missed me, then say that.
Old friends catch up.
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If y’all lost money off it, then say that.
I may have a new respect for that other guy. I still don’t like him.
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Is it a contest?
If y’all love reality tv, just say that. Bro, Earth. That shit is not even real.
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If y’all got skills, say that then.
Would you set up outside to make coin? Fuck the government.
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I have a plan
A good friend of mine asked me to mention him, Fuck you Anthony.
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If y’all trying to chill, I’ll be at the house.
I did that already.
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I get paid for that.
If y’all want to be a server, you can’t give a fuck.
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If y’all ready, then say that.
If y’all tired of hearing just me, then say that.
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If y’all going down with the ship, move over.
Revolution isn’t scary.
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How is there not enough water to water the potatoes?
If y’all gave up, just say that.
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If y’all worked here before, say that then.
Every now and then a mf’er breaks my heart thinking they better than me.
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If y’all wouldn’t slap a rapist, say that then.
Little changes, big reward.
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None of y’all love potatoes and it shows.
Men of power used to wear wigs and heels like a boss. Stop saying you know shit.
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If y’all think shit is cheap, say that then.
Is everyone stealing or something?
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If y’all think we could be better, say that then.
Education is biased?
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If y’all hid eggs for Easter, who you sacrifice your children to?
I don’t know man, just reset the planet.
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If y’all got a truth, tell it then.
But give me five.
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If y’all can’t fix me for cheap then say that.
This is your healthcare system. This is your America.
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If they get froggy, are y’all leapin?
It’s about to go down, I got six machetes.
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If y’all got a doctor, do they like you though?
I’m gonna die rich if I gotta die.
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If y’all on repeat then say that.
Seasonal depression exists because y’all wanna be outside in winter.
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If y’all love the way they lie, then say that.
How do I pre order my waterfront property?
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Have y’all ever been on a road trip?
Get you a Lincoln.
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I never said I won’t fight you.
It’s like that.
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If y’all not soldiers then say that.
They said there’s other jobs though. Watch the damn news.
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Sometimes it’s that simple.
If y’all want war, let’s go.
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If y’all disagree then say that.
“They couldn’t get rid of their Egyptian mindset.”
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If y’all need a side hustle, fentanyl is not the answer, or is it?
Why can’t we survive y’all?
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If I was rich I’d be so poor.
If y’all donate then say that.
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