PODCAST · education
Heal The Hurt
by Kenny Weiss
Welcome to the Heal the Hurt Podcast with Kenny Weiss — ICF Certified Life Coach and creator of the Worst Day Cycle™, Authentic Self Cycle, and Emotional Authenticity Method.Everything else treats symptoms. I treat the blueprint.If you've tried therapy, CBT, DBT, IFS, EQ, books, and self-help and still feel stuck — you're not broken. You're programmed. And programs can be rewritten.Each episode decodes the childhood emotional blueprint driving your triggers, shutdowns, and relationship cycles — and gives you root-cause tools to rewire them. No fluff. No toxic positivity. Just truth.
Episodes
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How to Make Friends as an Adult: The Gas Pedal Rule
If making friends as an adult feels impossible, or every friendship turns into you doing all the giving, this is the one rule nobody taught you. How to make friends as an adult starts with pacing how fast you open up, and reading what the other person does with it. In this video I walk through a...
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Emotionally Immature Parents: The Wound You Can't Point To
Adult children of emotionally immature parents often say their childhood was fine, and still feel responsible for everyone's emotions as adults. This video explains why: an emotionally unavailable parent enmeshes a child just as surely as an overbearing one. A client of mine cried for twenty...
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How to Stop Obsessing Over Someone: The Love Addict Trap
If you can't stop obsessing over someone who barely shows up for you, this video explains why, and it isn't what attachment labels tell you. How to stop obsessing over someone starts with seeing what the obsession actually protects you from. In this video I walk through a real client session: two...
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Hyper-Independence Isn't Strength, It's a Trauma Response
If you can't ask anyone for help, and "I've got this, I don't need it" runs your life, this is what it actually is. Hyper independence is not strength. It is a trauma response, and the one survival persona our culture rewards most. In this video: the day I described the person who drives…
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Coddling Isn't Love - It Says “I Don't Think You Can”
Your parents paid for it, fixed it, called ahead and smoothed it over, and you grew up quietly enraged at people who were supposedly so good to you. Coddling is not love. Underneath it is an unspoken message: I don't think you're capable. In this video I show you why being rescued as a child...
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Trauma Dumping - How to Stop Being Everyone's Emotional Dumping Ground
You get off the phone drained again, and somewhere in that hour you realized they never once asked about you. Trauma dumping is what that is, and being everybody's emotional dumping ground is not a personality trait. In this video I give you the exact word for word response I use to decline being...
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Fear of Rejection — Why No One Has Ever Actually Rejected You
You are not actually afraid of rejection. You are afraid of not being wanted, and those are two different wounds. In this video on the fear of rejection, I show you why no one has ever actually rejected you, and what was really happening instead. Most content on the fear of rejection teaches you...
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Why You’re So Hard on Yourself — The Federer 54% Rule
Why am I so hard on myself? Because your self-criticism was installed in childhood, and Roger Federer's own career numbers prove the standard you're beating yourself with is a lie. In this video, trauma recovery and relationship coach Kenny Weiss explains where self-criticism really comes from…
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Passive Aggression — Why “Keeping the Peace” Is Quietly Destroying You
Passive aggressive behavior is not a communication problem. It is self-abandonment, and every fake yes you say to keep the peace builds the quiet resentment that is slowly destroying you and your relationship. In this video, trauma recovery and relationship coach Kenny Weiss breaks down why you...
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Radical Acceptance - How to Stop Waiting for Them to Change
Radical acceptance means you stop expecting them to change, ever. It is not approval and it is not surrender, it is how you stop waiting and finally get your peace back. In this video, trauma recovery and relationship coach Kenny Weiss explains how to practice radical acceptance with a partner,...
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Self Deception - Why You Lie to Yourself Before Anyone Else
Self-deception is the lie you sell yourself before you ever sell it to anyone else. This is why you can be sincere and manipulative at the very same time, and how to finally catch it. In this video, relationship and trauma recovery specialist Kenny Weiss breaks down self-deception, the quiet form...
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Why You Rage at Your Kids - It’s Not About Them
Mom rage and dad rage are almost never about your kids. If you keep asking why am I so angry at my kids, the answer is unhealed pain from your own childhood coming out sideways, and it can be rewired at the root. In this video, trauma recovery and relationship coach Kenny Weiss explains why you...
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Enabling Is Not Love - Why Helping Them Is Hurting Both of You
Enabling is not love. Taking the calls, offering the solutions, and reassuring them is co-abuse disguised as care, and handing the problem back is the most loving thing you can do for both of you. In this video, trauma recovery and relationship coach Kenny Weiss explains how to stop enabling a...
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Daddy Issues — The Father Blueprint Running Your Adult Relationships
Daddy issues describe the specific signature of paternal emotional patterning that becomes the adult's template for safety, worth, authority, and intimacy, distinct from mommy issues in mechanism and adult expression. This video walks through what daddy issues actually are, why both sexes carry...
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Why You're Crying for No Reason — The Body Catching Up on Old Pain
Crying for no reason is the nervous system releasing emotion that the child was not allowed to express. This is not dysfunction, it is the body completing what was once incomplete. The tears are arriving on time, decades late. This video walks through why you are crying in parking lots, in…
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Victim Mentality: Why You Became the Victim Decades Ago
If you have a victim mentality, you are not weak and you are not broken, and you are not doing it on purpose. This video explains why you chose the victim position decades ago in childhood, and the path back out. Victim mentality rarely starts in your current relationship or your divorce. It…
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Avoidant Attachment: Why You Sabotage Every Relationship You Want
Avoidant attachment is not coldness, and it is not emotional unavailability, it is emotional unprotection. If you keep pushing away the people you most want to keep, this video shows you why it happens and the concrete steps to start healing it. Relationship and childhood trauma recovery…
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Why Am I So Angry Over Little Things? The Fear Underneath
Why am I so angry over little things, and why does it seem to come out of nowhere? If anger management has never actually worked for you, this video shows you the fear hiding underneath your anger and how to release it instead of suppressing it. Relationship and childhood trauma recovery…
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Disorganized Attachment — When the Person You Need Is Also Dangerous
Disorganized attachment forms when the same caregiver is both the source of comfort and the source of fear, creating an adult nervous system that approaches and avoids in the same instant. This is the both-at-once wound. This video walks through what disorganized attachment actually is, why…
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Anhedonia — Why You Don't Feel Anything (And How to Get It Back)
Anhedonia is not a chemical deficiency. It is the protective collapse of an emotional system that has been suppressing for too long. Feeling returns when the survival persona is gently dismantled and the Authentic Self is given permission to feel again. This video walks through what anhedonia...
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How to Stop Overthinking — Why Your Brain Won't Shut Up
Overthinking is not a cognitive habit, it is hypervigilance, the adult continuation of the childhood emotional forecasting system used to predict and prevent caregiver harm. You are not thinking, you are scanning. This video walks through what overthinking actually is, why meditation, journaling,...
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You Don't Hate Yourself — You're Hearing Your Childhood Caregiver
Self-hate is not a personal feeling. It is the absorbed internal voice of a critical caregiver, mistaken for the self's own thought. You have been arguing with the wrong narrator for thirty years. This video walks through what self-hate actually is, why it has resisted every affirmation and every...
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Resentment Is a Receipt — Every Time You Said Yes When You Meant No
Resentment is not unresolved anger toward another person. It is the rage of the abandoned self toward the survival persona that did the abandoning. Every line item on the receipt is a moment you said yes when your body said no. This video walks through the real psychology behind resentment and…
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Why You Keep Ending Up in Situationships — The Childhood Blueprint
A situationship is not a modern dating phenomenon. It is the perfect adult re-creation of an inconsistent childhood attachment, where intermittent emotional reward becomes the only way the nervous system recognizes love. This video walks through the real psychology behind situationships and the...
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Mommy Issues Isn't a Joke — It's Your Emotional Blueprint
Mommy issues are not a personality quirk. They are the maternal nervous system's emotional climate installed in the child's body before language, becoming the adult's internal weather system. This video walks through what mommy issues actually are, why both sexes carry them, and why the joke...
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Weaponized Incompetence - The Childhood Strategy Killing Your Marriage
Weaponized incompetence is not manipulation and not laziness. It is the adult expression of a childhood survival strategy where deliberate failure protected the child from engulfment or punishment for being capable. This video walks through the real psychology behind weaponized incompetence and…
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Fight, Flight, Freeze, Fawn - Why You Keep Reacting Like a Scared Child
Fight, flight, freeze, and fawn are not bad habits, not personality flaws, and not things you can think your way out of. They are childhood survival states still running in your adult nervous system, and every productivity hack and coping skill has failed you because the body is not broken, the...
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Fear of Abandonment Is Why You Picked Them - The Trauma Blueprint Nobody Talks About
Fear of abandonment is not a personality, it is a childhood blueprint that is still picking your partners for you. Your nervous system is not scanning the room for who will be good to you, it is scanning for someone who matches the unfinished business of your childhood. If you keep falling for...
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Enmeshment: Why You're Still Emotionally Married to Your Mother
Enmeshment is why your marriage feels lonely even when nothing is wrong, and your spouse has been competing with your mother for years without anyone naming it. If you call your mom four times a day, run every decision past her, and feel guilty when you don't, this video explains what is actually...
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Avoidant Attachment - The Six Hidden Selves Inside the Partner Who Pulls Away
Avoidant attachment is not coldness, it is a six-part survival system the avoidant built before they could read, and until you can name all six parts, no relationship advice will reach them. If you are the partner who keeps reaching, or the partner who keeps disappearing, this video maps the…
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Reactive Abuse Isn't a Defense - It's Your Survival Persona
Reactive abuse is real, and it is also the disempowered survival persona abusing from the victim position. Both partners are using the same control mechanisms from opposite ends of the same codependence spectrum, and that is the truth nobody in narcissistic abuse recovery wants to hear. If you…
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They're Not Emotionally Unavailable - They're Emotionally Unprotected
Emotionally unavailable is the wrong word. The man you call distant is not unavailable, he is unprotected. What you have been calling a personality flaw is a survival strategy with a specific childhood origin and a specific dissolution path nobody else is teaching you. If you have spent years...
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Your 'Narcissistic Mother' Probably Isn't a Narcissist
Your "narcissistic mother" is almost never a narcissist. She is something the rest of YouTube has no language for, and naming it correctly is the only thing that gives you a real shot at getting free. If you have spent years collecting evidence, watching every Dr. Ramani video, and still feel…
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Why You Sabotage Yourself - The Childhood Origin Nobody Names
Self-sabotage is not a willpower problem. It is the most loyal thing you have ever done, and it was installed in childhood. This video names the actual mechanism every other framework misses. If you have read every limiting belief book, tried every inner critic worksheet, and still keep…
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How to Set Boundaries — The Tennis Court Method
How to set boundaries when you've spent your whole life saying yes and feeling resentful. This is the Tennis Court Method, the exact system, scripts, and inner work that finally make boundaries hold without guilt, collapse, or counterattack. If you've read every boundary book and still freeze the...
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People Pleasing Isn't Kindness — It's a Covert God Complex
People pleasing is not kindness. It is a covert God complex installed in childhood that keeps you stuck in resentment, exhaustion, and self-betrayal. In this video, Kenny Weiss exposes the engine underneath chronic people pleasing and walks you through his Five-Step No Process for finally setting...
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Setting Boundaries With Parents - Why It Feels Like Betrayal
Setting boundaries with parents feels like betrayal because you are breaking the childhood attachment contract your nervous system signed before you had words. This video walks you through why no other boundary triggers shame this hard, and the exact scripts that hold even when your parent...
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Parentification - When You Were Your Parents’ Parent
If your mom called you her best friend and your dad called you his confidant, you were not in a close family, you were parentified. This video explains parentification, emotional incest, and the survival persona that keeps you over-functioning in every adult relationship. This video is for the...
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Why You Shut Down During Arguments - It’s Not What You Think
Do you shut down during arguments? Go blank, numb, frozen — unable to find words while your partner thinks you don’t care? This is not a communication problem. It’s a nervous system problem that started in childhood. In this video, Kenny Weiss explains why emotional shutdown during arguments is…
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Enmeshment - The Childhood Abuse Nobody Talks About
Enmeshment is a parenting style society mischaracterizes as love. In this video, Kenny Weiss explains how enmeshed families dissolve the boundaries between parent and child, turning the child into an emotional caretaker, confidant, and surrogate spouse before they can even tie their shoes. If you...
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Suppressed Anger — Why Rage Is Actually a Cry for Connection
Your anger isn’t a character flaw. It’s a childhood survival strategy that’s been running your nervous system for decades. In this video, Kenny Weiss explains why suppressed anger is actually a subconscious request for intimacy, and how to rewire it from the root. If you’ve ever exploded at your...
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Trauma Bonding Isn’t Love — It’s Your Childhood on Repeat
Trauma bonding is not love, and it is not an unhealthy attachment. It is a survival attachment built on your childhood emotional blueprint. In this video, I walk you through the complete 7-Stage Trauma-Bond Emotional Cycle and show you exactly why your nervous system keeps pulling you back to the...
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You Can’t Stop a Spiral Once You’re In One — Here’s What to Do Instead
How to stop emotional spirals with proactive emotional regulation: you cannot stop a spiral once you’re in one — you have to train your nervous system before the crash. Kenny Weiss teaches the Five-Step Change Process, the Snowbank metaphor, and the Three Unstuck Questions. In this video, Kenny...
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Your Thoughts Are Lawyers for Your Emotions - Not Leaders
Somatic emotional regulation is the missing piece for overthinkers. You cannot think your way out of trauma — your thoughts are lawyers arguing for whatever your body has already decided is true based on your childhood emotional blueprint. In this video, Kenny Weiss explains the neuroscience of…
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Your Emotions Aren’t Overreactions - They’re Reactivations From Childhood
How to stop emotional triggers instantly: your emotions are not overreactions — they are reactivations from your childhood emotional blueprint. Kenny Weiss teaches the 3-step Emotional Authenticity framework and somatic titration to heal triggers at the root. In this video, Kenny explains why...
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IFS Keeps You Fragmented - Here’s What Actually Heals Trauma
Why IFS therapy fails for emotional regulation: parts work reinforces the fragmentation that trauma created. Kenny Weiss explains why cognitive negotiation with “parts” collapses during nervous system flooding and how to integrate instead of fragment. In this video, Kenny reveals the fatal flaw…
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You Can’t Think Your Way Out of a Trigger - Here’s What Actually Works
You keep reacting the same way, and you wonder why. Metacognitive emotional regulation is the root-cause process that rewires your brain at the blueprint level — not with tips, but by changing the neural pathways driving your triggers. In this video, Kenny Weiss explains the neuroscience behind…
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Why Success Feels Empty
High achievers use success as a survival persona to outrun childhood shame. Kenny Weiss explains how shame acts as a booster rocket — providing explosive energy for achievement but ultimately causing burnout, panic attacks, and collapse. Learn how to change your fuel source from shame to…
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Triggers Are a Myth
Dr. Lisa Feldman Barrett's neuroscience proves that emotions are predictions, not reactions. When you feel triggered, your brain accesses your childhood emotional blueprint to predict danger — not respond to the present moment. Kenny Weiss explains how to use the Emotional Authenticity Method to...
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Why Symptom Management Fails
Traditional emotional regulation is like fixing a blown engine by polishing the hood. Kenny Weiss explains the Emotional Thermostat concept — how growing up in a chaotic home permanently sets your nervous system baseline to an emotional fever — and introduces the Alarm Reset System and Somatic...
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ABOUT THIS SHOW
Welcome to the Heal the Hurt Podcast with Kenny Weiss — ICF Certified Life Coach and creator of the Worst Day Cycle™, Authentic Self Cycle, and Emotional Authenticity Method.Everything else treats symptoms. I treat the blueprint.If you've tried therapy, CBT, DBT, IFS, EQ, books, and self-help and still feel stuck — you're not broken. You're programmed. And programs can be rewritten.Each episode decodes the childhood emotional blueprint driving your triggers, shutdowns, and relationship cycles — and gives you root-cause tools to rewire them. No fluff. No toxic positivity. Just truth.
HOSTED BY
Kenny Weiss
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Frequently Asked Questions
How many episodes does Heal The Hurt have?
Heal The Hurt currently has 503 episodes available on PodParley. New episodes are automatically indexed when they're published to the podcast feed.
What is Heal The Hurt about?
Welcome to the Heal the Hurt Podcast with Kenny Weiss — ICF Certified Life Coach and creator of the Worst Day Cycle™, Authentic Self Cycle, and Emotional Authenticity Method.Everything else treats symptoms. I treat the blueprint.If you've tried therapy, CBT, DBT, IFS, EQ, books, and self-help and...
How often does Heal The Hurt release new episodes?
Heal The Hurt releases new episodes frequently with a large back catalog of 503 episodes. Check the episode list for recent publication dates.
Where can I listen to Heal The Hurt?
You can listen to Heal The Hurt on PodParley by clicking any episode. We provide an embedded audio player for direct listening, and you can also subscribe via your preferred podcast app using the RSS feed.
Who hosts Heal The Hurt?
Heal The Hurt is created and hosted by Kenny Weiss.
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