In Your Presence

Fr. Eric Nicolai preached this meditation on August 17, 2026 at Parkhill Centre in Ottawa.Prayer in our life is an essential part of our existence of sons of God. It gives our resilience, and our purpose going. It is like the engine room of our interior life. In the Gospel, we have the Pharisees complaining about the company that Jesus kept. This prompted Jesus to reaffirm the truth of God’s mercy through the most iconic parables of the Gospel: The conversion of the prodigal son.Music: 'Undertow' by Scott Buckley - released under CC-BY 4.0. www.scottbuckley.comThumbnail: Rembrandt, The Conversion of the Prodigal Son, 1661.

A meditation preached by Fr. Eric Nicolai at Camp Caribou near Barry's Bay, Ontario, on August 25th, 2026.Today, the Gospel speaks about the distaste that Jesus had for those who relied on appearances, on image, on looking good to others. Those who spent time cultivating a public image. It is a rather blistering accusation.Matt 23, 24-26: Alas for you, scribes and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You who clean the outside of cup and dish and leave the inside full of extortion and intemperance. Blind Pharisee! Clean the inside of cup and dish first so that the outside may become clean as well.’Music: Regi Stone, All Heavens Declare.Thumbnail: Rembrandt, Jesus preaching. Etching, Boston Museum of Fine Arts.

A meditation on the feast of St. Bartholomew, preached by Fr. Eric Nicolai at Ernescliff College on August 24, 2026.He preached in India and Armenia. For Bartholomew: “he shed his skin”: both in martyrdom and spiritual transformation, putting off the “old self” so that the new person may emerge.Thumbnail: detail from Michelangelo's Last Judgment in the Sistine Chapel, 1536.Marco d’Agrate’s statue in Milan Cathedral, known as the San Bartolomeo scorticato:https://mainlymuseums.com/post/1174/the-anti-david-st-bartholomew-by-marco-dadrate-1562/Music: Lifting Dreams - Aakash Gandhi Youtube free

In 1975, Pope Paul VI told Blessed Alvaro del Portillo: "Collect everything that the Founder has written, because it is already a treasure belonging to the whole Church.”

Maximilian Kolbe had a vision of our Lady who offered him two crowns: a white one for virginity, a red one for martyrdom. Which do you want? I’ll take both.that Mary is and a sign of hope and comfort for your people on their pilgrim way. 
(Assumption preface)Thumbnail: Esteban Márquez de Velasco (1652–1696) , Dormition of the virgin Mary, Art Gallery of Ontario.

A meditation preached by Fr. Eric Nicolai on August 1, 2026 at Ellentor Centre in Toronto.Matt 14, 22-36: Jesus walks on the water, and calls out to Peter: Come!Water in the ancient world was always seen as a place of instability. It was a scary place when you had these rickety boats. But Jesus informs everything we do. It is our life of faith. Our faith must inform our vision, the way we think, the way we work. It leaves its fingerprints everywhere we go. There you will find the DNA of faith.Music: pulsebox-piano-music-free-music-552725 pixabay freeThumbnail: Walking on Water, by Ivan Aivazovsky (1888), private collection.

A meditation preached by Fr. Eric Nicolai on August 1, 2026 at Ellentor Centre in Toronto. John 6:1-15 tells of the account of the feeding of the 5 thousand. Lots of people. A real problem. A multitude had followed him. Lifting up his eyes, then, and seeing that a multitude was coming to himHe looked up with mercy, with compassion. In front of the problem, the numbers, the money, the few pieces of bread, we hear about that little boy. 10 or 12 years old. Not with his parents. Free to help.One of his disciples, Andrew, Simon Peter’s brother, said to him, John 6, 9-10: “There is a lad here who has five barley loaves and two fish; but what are they among so many?”  Jesus said, “Make the people sit down.” Now there was much grass in the place; so the men sat down, in number about five thousand. 

A meditation preached by Fr. Eric Nicolai at Ellentor Centre in Toronto, July 31, 2026."Don't forget that sometimes it is necessary to have smiling faces." (The Way, 657)

A meditation preached by Fr. Eric Nicolai at Chipnee camp in Port Burwell, Ontario, July 22 2026.Mary Magdalene is the first person to whom the risen Christ appeared and he entrusted her with announcing the Resurrection to the Apostles themselves. She is the apostles of Apostles. Pope Francis elevated her memorial to the level of a feast.Music: pulsebox-piano-music-cinematic-552722Thumbnail: Antonio Canova, Penitent Magdalene 1808, St. Petersburg Museum.

A meditation preached by Fr. Eric Nicolai at Chipnee Camp in Port Burwell, Ontario, on July 21, 2026.We reflect on the famous story of the young rich man who approaches Jesus to ask him something.(Mt 19:16–22; Mk 10:17–22; Lk 18:18–23) It’s a key text, one of the most memorable encounters that Jesus had. It is full of youthful horizons, yet mystery and a bitter dissolution too.What does it mean to live a full life?Music: pulsebox-piano-music-cinematic-552722Audiio_MULVEY_Awakening_Awakening_InstrumentalThumbnail: Crucifixion from France, 12th century, St. Louis Art Museum.

A meditation preached by Fr. Eric Nicolai at Chipnee Girls Camp in Port Burwell, Ontario.The disciples of Emmaus shared an intense run home after having seen and heard the Lord. When we are together, we cease to be fragile.

A meditation preached by Fr. Eric Nicolai at Ernescliff College, Toronto, on July 14, 2026. Sitting in front of the Saint Lawrence River, seeing all that water pass by, sometimes calm, other times more agitated. All that water is going to a hydroelectric dam, where it will go through turbines to generate much energy.  That daily flow looks peaceful, even tranquil, yet carries with it great energy. All our activities in our life, our work, our stress- they are like that river, flowing, but they must all go through turbines to serve as sources of good supernatural energy. It is an image of what we see in the account of Martha and Mary, in Luke.Music: pulsebox-piano-music-cinematic-552722Thumbnail: Hydroelectric Power Dam

A meditation by Fr. Eric Nicolai at Ellerton Center in Toronto, preached on July 4th, 2026.Mt 20:1-16: Parable of the Workers in the Vineyard.For the kingdom of heaven is like a landowner who went out early in the morning to hire workers for his vineyard. 2 He agreed to pay them a denarius for the day and sent them into his vineyard. From that early moment, he went out many times after. 9 a.m., He went out again about noon and about three p.m. Then again about five p.m. He asked them, ‘Why have you been standing here all day long doing nothing?’ “‘Because no one has hired us,’ they answered. “He said to them, ‘You also go and work in my vineyard.’ Even at the end of our life, God calls us.Thumbnail: Jean-François Millet, les Glaneuses, Musée d’Orsay 1857Music: pulsebox-piano-music-cinematic-552722

A meditation preached by Fr. Eric Nicolai on July 8th, 2026, at Kintore College, Toronto.Today’s Gospel gives us a glimpse of that luminous moment in which Jesus entrusts his apostles with the most important responsibility of their lives. Nobody has ever been entrusted with a mission as important as this, with such decisive consequences for world history.The account of Jesus' choice of his 12 apostles from Matt 10, 1-7: "Jesus summoned his twelve disciples, and gave them authority over unclean spirits with power to cast them out and to cure all kinds of diseases and sickness.  These are the names of the twelve apostles: first, Simon who is called Peter, and his brother Andrew; James the son of Zebedee, and his brother John; Philip and Bartholomew; Thomas, and Matthew the tax collector; James the son of Alphaeus, and Thaddaeus; Simon the Zealot and Judas Iscariot, the one who was to betray him."Thumbnail: Massacio (Tommaso di Ser Giovanni di Simone), "Peter Healing the sick with his shadow", Florence, Santa Maria del Carmine, Florence, 1424-1425.Music: pulsebox piano music-cinematic-552722

A meditation preached by Fr. Eric Nicolai at Ernescliff College, Toronto, on July 6, 2026.From today's gospel, Matthew 9, 18-26: "...Then from behind him came a woman, who had suffered from a hemorrhage for twelve years, and she touched the fringe of his cloak, for she said to herself, ‘If I can only touch his cloak I shall be well again.’ Jesus turned round and saw her; and he said to her, ‘Courage, my daughter, your faith has restored you to health.’ And from that moment the woman was well again."The 12 years of hemorrhage was humiliating; it weakened her, and it depleted her resources. But she reached out, discreetly, with a humble faith, just to touch the very fringe of his garment. As though she wanted to go unnoticed. It was a humble faith. It must be present in our initiatives as well. It will be rewarded, but we have to stay humble.Thumbnail: Fresco of the Healing of the woman with the issue of Blood, in the Catacomb of Sts Marcellinus and Peter, Rome, 4th century.Music: pulsebox-piano-music-cinematic-552722

A meditation preached by Fr. Eric Nicolai on June 28, 2026 at Ellerton Centre, Toronto.Matthew 10:37-42: Jesus instructed the Twelve as follows: ‘Anyone who prefers father or mother to me is not worthy of me. Anyone who prefers son or daughter to me is not worthy of me. Anyone who does not take his cross and follow in my footsteps is not worthy of me. Anyone who finds his life will lose it; anyone who loses his life for my sake will find it.

A meditation preached by Fr. Eric Nicolai at Kintore College in Toronto, on July 1, 2026. (new audio file with proper editing uploaded July 2)An account of the two demoniacs of the Gerasenes in Matthew 8:28–34. Jesus intervened and restored them to normality, but it meant that the herd of pigs was lost. Jesus has restored something authentic in this place, but the villagers are too desensitized to see it, to perceive it. This is really about the authority of Jesus on this earth, in our work, in our day-to-day. He must really be there. Yes, he can expel the demons of indifference. Of lukewarm norms, of lack of care in fraternity.Thumbnail: The Gerasene Demoniac by Sebastian Bourdon (1653)Music: pulsebox-piano-music-cinematic-552722 no copyrigh t

A meditation preached on June 24, 2026 at Hawthorn School for Girls on the solemnity of John the Baptist. From the very womb of his elderly mother, John was inundated by the Holy Spirit so as to prepare the manifestation of Jesus to the people.  He grew and lived in the desert.  He was preparing himself for his mission through solitude and prayer. Isaiah 40, 1-5: A voice of one crying in the desert. Prepare the way for the Lord.All the prophets before him anticipated the Messiah; John actually points Him out directly (“Behold the Lamb of God”)That can sometimes be your life, a voice crying out in the desert of secularism, immoral conduct, ideologies that go against nature, and the dignity of man. It ends up with strange fabrications, rejection of God, and distortion of the faith. As Saint Josemaria said: “We certainly need to convert anew, to be more fully loyal and more deeply humble, so that our selfishness decreases and Christ can grow in us. For illum oportet crescere, me autem minui, “he must increase and I must decrease.” (Christ is Passing By, no. 58)

A meditation preached at Ellentor centre in Toronto, on the feast of Saint Josemaria, on June 26, 2026.It’s the legacy that we have the responsibility to maintain, to care for. We know sound elements of doctrine, but it comes out in unique ways in our apostolate, in our family prayer, our interest in others. What is the origin of this legacy?Music: pulsebox-piano-music-cinematic-552722 Free copyright on Pixabay.

A meditation preached at Kintore College, Toronto, on June 25, 2026.Matt 7, 21-29: ‘Everyone then who hears these words of mine and does them will be like a wise man who built his house on the rock. And the rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat on that house, but it did not fall, because it had been founded on the rock. And everyone who hears these words of mine and does not do them will be like a foolish man who built his house on the sand. And the rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell, and great was the fall of it.’A building may appear beautiful and impressive, yet if its foundations are weak, sooner or later cracks will begin to show. The same is true of our spiritual lives. Much of what sustains us remains hidden from view: our prayer, our relationship with God, and especially our sense of divine filiation.Music: Carlos Gardel, Soledad, arranged for guitar by Bert Alink.

A meditation preached by Fr. Eric Nicolai on June 19, 2026 at the Manoir de Beaujeu, at Coteau du Lac, Quebec.As we do our prayer, we consider that it is especially our heart that has been set aflame even more, rejuvenated, cleared of any arterial sclerosis, any build up over time, so that may may always live freely, purely and sincererly, as we consider that we are here in this place because we have given everything to God. Ancient tradition of the church reveals that she has seen numerous Christians that observed celibacy for the kingdom. Propter regnum coelorum. Apostolic celibacy is a testimony, a witness, but only if our heart is truly transparent to the love of God.

Meditation by Fr. Eric Nicolai at Ellentor Centre in Toronto, May 29, 2026. Today is the memorial of Pope Paul VI, Giovanni Battista Montini, a man of courage in a time of upheaval.Gen 12, 1-16: God speaks to Abraham: leave your country, your family, and go to the country I will tell you. So he responded by going to that unknown country. He was open to what God wanted. It took courage and fortitude and magnanimity to undertake such a massive task, to be the father of a nation.We need this human virtue of fortitude, but it must also be supernatural, done out of love.Music: Mulvey Awakening

In preparation for the solemnity of Pentecost, we have been trying to see all the things that can happen if we really become docile to his presence in our souls. For the apostles, it was manifested by a powerful wind that shook the house that they were in. Like a powerful tornado, a divine presence that no one could ignore. The result was that their lives were imbued with the fruits of the Holy Spirit. A meditation preached on the eve of Pentecost at Kintore College, Toronto, May 23, 2026.Music: Audiio MULVEY Awakening Instrumental.Thumbnail: Bernini's Holy Spirit in St. Peter's Basilica, Rome.

Preached by Fr. Eric Nicolai at Kintore College, Toronto on May 21, 2026. As we prepare for Pentecost, let us consider the first gift of the Holy Spirit, wisdom, which enables you to see how good and great the Lord is and, fills our life with flavour, so that, as Jesus said, you may be “salt of the earth”.Music: Audio MULVEY Awakening InstrumentalThumbnail: St. James the Greater Catholic Church, Concord, NC. Wikimedia

A meditation preached by Fr. Eric Nicolai at Hawthorn School for Girls in Toronto on May 20, 2026. During the month of May we prepare for Pentecost and also increase our devotion to our blessed Mother, Mary. There is an intimate connection between Mary and the Holy Spirit.  Mary attracted the Holy Spirit like a magnet at the Annunciation, and when she was at the centre of the apostles at Pentecost.  Two moments in which she served as a powerful attraction to draw down the Holy Spirit onto the world, onto the church, unto us and our priesthood. The two are connected.We need Mary, we need the gifts of the Holy Spirit.Music: Audiio MULVEY Awakening Awakening InstrumentalThumbnail: Juan Bautista Maíno (1581-1649), La Pentecôte 1615, Prado Museum.

A meditation preached by Fr. Eric Nicolai at Ellentor centre in Toronto on the solemnity of the Ascension, May 17 2026.This is a feast, but it is often under-celebrated. Even the iconography is odd. It shows the apostles standing in a circle, looking up, with Jesus out of the picture, as he floats up to heaven. You can only see his feet. It’s like the feast of the feet of Jesus.Music: Audiio_MULVEY_Awakening_Awakening_InstrumentalThumbnail:

A meditation preached by Fr. Eric Nicolai at Kintore College, Toronto, on May 14, 2026. John 19, 25-27:  Near the cross of Jesus stood his mother, his mother’s sister, Mary the wife of Clopas, and Mary Magdalene. 26 When Jesus saw his mother there, and the disciple whom he loved standing nearby, he said to her, “Woman, here is your son,” 27 and to the disciple, “Here is your mother.” From that time on, this disciple took her into his home. It is one of the most oft-represented scenes in art: Jesus on the cross, with Mary and John below, weeping, in pain.It was right after the soldiers had divided his garments into four parts, one for each soldier, as though they were getting precious relics in that moment, but they were seeing these garments as pieces that they themselves might wear, or sell. He is saying to us now, before Pentecost: Behold your mother. Stay with Mary in the month of May so that you might truly be touched by the Holy Spirit. Pentecost is coming. 

A meditation preached by Fr. Eric Nicolai at Ernescliff College, Toronto, on May 10, 2026.This is the month of Pentecost, and we can picture the scene as these flames of fire, these wisps over the head of each apostle. Remember the speech that Cardinal Bergoglio gave in the conclave back in 2013.He spoke about the Church’s temptation to withdraw into self‑protection, regulations, and control rather than trusting the Holy Spirit. Pentecost, by contrast, breaks open that fear: the Spirit falls on them, they receive courage and understanding, and they are thrust out into the streets to preach Christ to all nations.Music: MULVEY Awakening Awakening Instrumental

Fr. Eric Nicolai preached this meditation at Ernescliff College on May 10, 2026.In 1932, Our Father wrote in his Intimate Notes, in a time of youth, a time with little experience, and uncertainty, and unsure of himself: Don’t speak: Listen to him. This was his attitude to the Holy Spirit. This applies to us. Some people speak a lot, and figure things out as they speak. But how actively do we really listen? To others, to the HS, to our own conscience? Have I fallen to the brain fog, this dissipation, not aware that inside that cloud of unknowing, there is God, the Holy Spirit is pointing at something.Music: Audiio MULVEY, Awakening Awakening Instrumental

Fr. Eric Nicolai preached this meditation on the anniversary of Pope Leo XIV's election, on May 8, 2026 at Ernescliff College, Toronto.Today’s antiphon on the anniversary of the election of the Pope, takes on special resonance for us.Matt 16, 16- 19: 6 Simon Peter answered, “You are the Messiah, the Christ, the one were expecting, the one we had hoped for, the Son of the living God.”  Jesus replied, “Blessed are you, Simon son of Jonah, for this was not revealed to you by flesh and blood, but by my Father in heaven.They are words that resonate with us, as we fortify our love for the Pope.Music: Vienna Philharmonic Orchestra, with license.

Meditation by Fr. Eric Nicolai on May 4th, 2026 at Ernescliff College, Toronto.John 14, 23-26: ‘If anyone loves me he will keep my word, and my Father will love him, and we shall come to him and make our home with him.The image that we, our soul, is like a dwelling place for God. The Lord says we shall come to dwell in us, like in a home, a castle, a mansion. He desires to find a beautiful place, a oul made for him, a soul that is fit for him, with an interior cleanliness. He sees you and me now, in our purpose, our inner person—mind, heart, desires, conscience, wounds, and hopes—not just outward behavior. He says we want to come. That action of the holy Trinity that comes to defend us, to be our advocate. He has many things to tell us.Music: Vienna Philharmonic OrchestraThumbnail: Neuschwanstein in winter in Germany

A meditation preached by Fr. Eric Nicolai at the new Ellerton Centre in Toronto, on Avenue Road on May 2, 2026.In this very moving passage in St. Paul's letter to the Romans, God helps us see the divine interlacing of the three theological virtues which form the backing upon which the true life of every Christian man or woman has to be woven.Romans 5, 1-5:   Therefore, since we are justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, 2 through whom we have obtained access to this grace in which we stand; and we boast in our hope of sharing the glory of God. 3 And not only that, but we also boast in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, 4 and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, 5 and hope does not disappoint us, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit that has been given to us.These virtues are alive in us. They are not dead or dormant, or like dead batteries. Lots of power to them, it drives us to energy. This is the battery that makes us grow in the life of grace.

A meditation by Fr. Eric Nicolai in Lyncroft Centre, Toronto, on the occasion of the exaltation of the Holy Cross, September 14, 2024. The cross is the instrument on which the Lord was executed. It was a Roman instrument of torture, state-sponsored terrorism. Jesus gave an explanation in mysterious words. Enigmatic, somewhat cryptic, evoking an image, a movement, a veiled, almost dream-like quality.  John 3, 13-17: Jesus said to Nicodemus: ‘No one has gone up to heaven except the one who has come down from heaven, the Son of Man. And just as Moses lifted up the serpent in the desert, so must the Son of Man be lifted up, so that everyone who believes in him may have eternal life.’ What does this mean for those who look upon the cross? Music: 'Life In Motion' by Scott Buckley - released under CC-BY 4.0. www.scottbuckley.com Thumbnail: Apse mosaic from San Clemente Romano, Rome.