PODCAST · health
Own Your Identity
by Jason Mellard
Own Your Identity empowers men experiencing same-sex attraction to live a life of purpose and possibility. Each episode contains actionable tools to keep listeners moving forward into the life they truly desire, through the power of Christ and for the glory of God.
Episodes
-
It's Time to Dream Again
Have you put your dreams on hold until you finally overcome your struggles? Evan joins Jason to share his journey with unwanted same-sex attraction (SSA), pornography recovery, and discovering his identity in Christ—and how he found hope to start dreaming again. For years, Evan felt less worthy...
-
What a Relief!
Being in the presence of an attractive man could make me exhale. Why?In this episode, I explore the relief I sometimes felt around confident men, the difference between effort fatigue and fear fatigue, and why I now bring my fear to God instead of looking to attraction for relief.Understanding…
more -
SSA, Marriage & Male Friendship: What Does Healthy Connection Look Like?
How much should you tell your wife when you’re struggling with same-sex attraction? What does healthy accountability look like? Can deep friendships with other men—including men who also experience SSA—be part of healing? And what about the longing for healthy physical touch? In this special…
more -
Your Story is a Gift
What changes when you stop wondering how others will respond to your story and decide in advance that your story is a gift? This episode explores how owning the meaning of your story can reduce mental clutter, help you be more present with others, and free you to share your story from a place of...
-
Presence and Curiosity
Have you ever walked into a room and immediately started comparing yourself? Maybe you're scanning for the "right" person to talk to. Maybe you're wondering if you measure up. Or maybe you're hiding behind the fear that if people really knew you, they'd walk away. I've lived all three. In this...
-
Take You with You: Don't Abandon Yourself
Have you ever left part of yourself behind? Many of us are moving through life carrying invisible instructions: "Stay here." "You're too weak." "You're too emotional." "I'll come back for you once I've figured life out." In this episode, I share a deeply personal story about the unexpected grief...
-
The Power of Meaning and Focus
What does the Pride flag mean to you? In this deeply personal episode, I share why the Pride flag has represented grief, permission, deception, and opportunity throughout different seasons of my life. More importantly, I explore two powerful abilities God has given each of us: the ability to…
more -
The Power of a Mentor Mindset
What if the best time to adopt a mentor mindset is when you feel least qualified? Most of us think of mentors as successful, confident people who have already overcome life's challenges. But what if one of the most powerful things you could do in a difficult season is spend two minutes a day...
-
Don't Let SSA Color Your Future
Chuck was 73 years old before he shared about his same-sex attractions. For decades, fear, shame, and silence kept parts of his story hidden. But when he finally chose to use his voice, he discovered something many of us need to hear: It is never too late. Never too late to tell the truth. Never...
-
If Muscles Could Talk
Why did a muscle magazine have such a hold on me? For years, I found myself drawn to images of strong, muscular men. I thought I was looking at bodies. Looking back, I think I was looking for something else. In this episode, I explore a question that has followed me for decades: If muscles could...
-
Shirts vs. Skins: Uncovering Body Shame
What if the shame you carry about your body is actually tied to a deeper story you’ve believed about yourself? In this deeply personal episode, Jason shares vivid memories from his childhood and teenage years — from “shirts vs. skins” in PE to comparing himself to other boys, feeling exposed in…
more -
You've Got What it Takes
“You’ve got what it takes.” That’s what my friend Noah writes to Timothy—a young man experiencing same-sex attraction (SSA) and feeling alone.In this episode, I share Noah’s letter and the impact it had on me. If you’ve wrestled with SSA, shame, identity, or your future, I hope this reminds you:...
-
Don’t Die Wondering: Interview with Bent on Men author
What are you avoiding that you don’t want to die wondering about? In this conversation with Harrison Bly, author of Bent on Men, we explore a simple but confronting rule of life: don’t die wondering. We talk about what it looks like to: Say the honest thing in friendships Share your story instead...
-
We Honor You
What happens when the story you’ve been telling yourself about your attractions begins to change? In this episode, Jason talks with Kevin, a graduate of the Own Your Identity group coaching program, about his journey from shame and isolation to honesty, community, and a renewed understanding of...
-
The Attraction Scorecard
What if you’ve been measuring the wrong thing? For years, I defined success in my SSA journey by whether I felt more drawn to women than men. In this conversation, I share why attraction isn’t a test — and how real growth is about staying grounded, aligned, and steady no matter what you feel.
-
There's Nothing Wrong with You
Living with shame can make life so much harder than it needs to be. My friend Lare and I invite you to choose a greater future than what shame offers. You are not broken and you aren't alone.
-
Trade Dead-Person Goals for Legacy Goals
Are your goals helping you become more alive—or just more controlled? This episode invites you to move beyond avoidance and into legacy, asking a simple but challenging question: what do people experience of life when they’re with you?For more tools to live beyond your same-sex attractions and…
more -
Remember Wonder
What if part of our healing isn’t just honoring what hurt, but remembering what made you feel alive? In this episode, I reflect on wonder as a practical posture—one that calms the nervous system, expands perspective, and helps you engage life with greater openness and courage. For more tools to...
-
There You Are
Do you brace yourself when someone says, "there you are"? In this episode, I discuss how this phrase can feel like pressure. But what if you let it be an invitation to just be yourself? For more tools to live beyond your same-sex attractions and into your purpose, visit ownyouridentitynow.com.
-
Reclaim Power Over Attractions
You don’t need to eliminate your attractions to be free. This episode reframes same-sex attraction as information rather than identity and offers a framework for responding with clarity, strength, and agency. Discover how to reclaim your power — and join the new course, Reclaim Power Over...
-
Men Create
What if the first thing God asked a man to do wasn’t to lead, protect, or achieve—but to create? In this episode, we explore the overlooked masculine calling of creativity: shaping life, bringing order from chaos, creating safety, setting vision, and reflecting the generative heart of God.…
more -
Vision Trumps Fantasy
Fantasy escapes reality. Vision transforms it. Vision gives direction, clarifies choices, changes what you tolerate, and activates courage. In this episode, you will learn to craft a clear and compelling vision capable of lasting transformation. For more tools to live beyond your same-sex...
-
Make Space for What's Next
If I received that promotion, I wouldn't be talking with you today. God used that disappointment to make space for something bigger. Now, I am a Certified High Performance Coach empowering men to live beyond their same-sex attractions and into their purpose. And I love it. What does God have next...
-
Participate in Masculinity
A powerful reminder that masculinity isn’t earned — it’s shared. In this episode, we explore what it means to participate in masculinity, belong among men, and reclaim the identity God has already woven into you. For more tools to live beyond your same-sex attractions and into your purpose, visit...
-
Redirect Your Sexual Energy for Greater Purpose
I decided I didn’t want to experience sexual pleasure alone. I want my gift of sexuality to be used for connection, creation, and service. In this episode, I'll share three shifts that made the biggest impact for me: 1. Believe that it is not necessary. 2. See sexual energy as a force for…
more -
The Key, the Locked Door, and the True Me
For years, I’ve stood in front of the mirror, staring at my reflection. I saw my silhouette—the outline of me. But just beyond it, like a shadow I couldn’t escape, was the outline of the man I thought I had to be. Broader shoulders. Thicker chest. Sharper jawline. I didn’t always know where that...
-
No Compromise: Why 100% is Easier than 99%
Do you find compromise exhausting? In this episode, we’re diving into why living aligned with your values 100% of the time is actually easier than 99%. That 1% of compromise—the “just this once” moments—creates mental clutter, inner conflict, and drains your energy. But when you commit fully to…
more -
Choose Your Feelings
When I turned to gay porn, I wasn’t just escaping life—I was running towards feelings I desired. I wanted to feel strong, inspired, connected, and safe. The good news? You don’t need anything outside yourself to feel those things. You can choose them—right now. And God made you capable of that.…
more -
Honor Your Anger
Learn to honor your anger, meet it with empathy, and process it in a way that helps you move forward. For more tools to live beyond your same-sex attractions and into your purpose, visit ownyouridentitynow.com.
-
Navigating Confusion
Ever felt stuck in the fog of confusion, unsure of your next step? In this episode, we dive deep into how moments of uncertainty can actually be the catalyst for clarity, growth, and connection. I’ll share personal insights and practical tools to help you embrace the fog, navigate through it, and...
-
When Admiration Shifts to Lust
How can we recognize the shift from admiration, to comparison, envy, or lust? In this episode, we will explore how to become more self-aware and navigate these moments a way that aligns with our values. For more tools to live beyond your same-sex attractions and into your purpose, visit...
-
Choose Me
Have you ever found yourself longing to be noticed? To be chosen? To hear someone say, You matter. You’re enough. I see you. In this week’s podcast episode, I share: How the longing to be chosen shows up in our lives. Why these desires are not about shame but about deeper connection. A 7-step...
-
Just Be
Today, we will learn how to just be ourselves, present in the moment, without overcompensating, performing, or needing to be "extra", inspired by the carefree nature of my son on the soccer field. For more tools for living an empowered life and navigating same-sex attraction, visit...
-
What I Wish I’d Learned Growing Up
Today, we’re going to talk about the things we didn’t learn from our dads, or our mentors, or our peers—and how that shaped us. But more importantly, we’re going to talk about how to fill that gap. Because here’s the truth: it’s not a liability. It’s an opportunity to grow, to connect, to stretch...
-
Am I Marriage Material?
If you’ve longed for a life shared with a wife — a woman to build a future with, to be known and loved by, and to love in return—this episode is for you. Together, we’ll explore the deeper questions beneath “Am I Marriage Material?”
-
The Locker Room: A Place of Vulnerability and Preparation
While I longed to be in the athletic, game-time locker room, energized with the team before stepping onto the field, I was doing good to make it through showering after junior high PE. If you’ve ever felt like me—like you didn’t measure up, were stuck on the sidelines, or hiding parts of yourself...
-
If You Only Knew
Those five words can feel like a prison — locking us in shame, self-doubt, and fear. But what if that phrase could be transformed from a whisper of shame to a declaration of hope? For more tools to live beyond your unwanted same-sex attractions, visit ownyouridentitynow.com.
-
Mastering the Moment: Mindfulness During SSA Urges
Do your same-sex attractions feel overwhelming at times? Maybe it’s a physical sensation that catches you off guard. Maybe it’s a romantic feeling that stirs something in your heart. Or maybe it’s a thought pattern that loops in your mind. These things can feel powerful, but I want you to know…
more -
3 Guys at the Airport and the Stories I Spun
When we admire something in others, it’s like God is whispering, “This is already in you. I’ve planted this seed—now let’s grow it together.” It’s not about striving to be someone else, it’s about stepping into the fullness of who He’s called you to be. For more tools to live beyond your unwanted...
-
Redesign Your Emotional Home
If you act out sexually with another guy, use porn, or entertain comparisons, what emotional home are you coming from? Is it loneliness? Shame? A need for validation? For many of us, those moments aren’t just about the act itself—they’re about seeking comfort in an emotional home we’ve lived in…
more -
Sacred Time. Sacred Purpose.
Time is sacred. It’s a gift from God, entrusted to us to use wisely. But too often we waste it obsessing over things that don’t serve us—whether it’s comparing ourselves to others, spinning in shame, or acting out in ways that don’t align with our values. It's a missed opportunity to step into…
more -
Celebrate Courage
When we take small, courageous steps—whether it’s replacing a limiting belief, speaking truth over ourselves, or simply showing up when it’s hard—it’s so important to pause and celebrate. Why? Because celebration reinforces the behavior. It tells your brain, This matters. This is who I am now.…
more -
The Power of Certainty
Imagine waking up each day knowing that no matter what happens, you are loved, you are enough in Christ, and the best is yet to come. Imagine living with a confidence that isn’t shaken by circumstances, a peace that isn’t dependent on outcomes, and a hope that fuels you forward. That’s the power…
more -
Am I Too Much?
Have you ever felt like you’re just too much for people? Like your personality, your struggles, or your past make you a burden, a liability, or someone who just doesn’t fit? If that’s you, I want you to know you're not alone.
-
Be Gentle. Be Sensitive. Be Bold.
For too long, the world has told men that gentleness and sensitivity are weaknesses. That to be a “real man,” you have to be tough, stoic, and unyielding. But the truth is: gentleness and sensitivity are not the opposite of strength—they’re the foundation of it. And when you pair them with...
-
He's an Attractive Guy. Period.
Have you ever noticed how quickly your mind can turn a simple observation into a full-blown story? You see an attractive guy, and before you know it, your brain is off to the races. But what if you could stop the mental loop? You could say, "He's an attractive guy." Period. For more tools to live...
-
We Just Talk and Take in the View
Have you ever felt like you’re on the outside looking in when it comes to friendships? In this episode, we’re breaking down those barriers and talking about how to build the deep, meaningful connections you were made for. For more resources to live beyond unwanted same-sex attraction, visit...
-
Let Christ White-Knuckle It
In this episode, I share the top 3 things I sought from porn, and the 6 steps that made the biggest impact for me toward freedom from porn. For more resources for overcoming porn and living beyond unwanted same-sex attraction, visit ownyouridentitynow.com.
-
Choose Your Frequency
Satan loves to turn up the bass on our negative thoughts, but every time you make a choice aligned with faith, love, and connection, you’re tuning into God’s frequency. You’re dismantling the lies and amplifying the truth. In this episode, I'll show you how. For more tools to live beyond your...
-
What are You Staring at?
What is more powerful— staring at our sin or staring at the face of God? Gaze at the face of God. And let His holiness, His love, and His grace bring you to your knees—not in shame, but in awe. For additional tools to live beyond unwanted same-sex attraction, visit ownyouridentitynow.com
We're indexing this podcast's transcripts for the first time — this can take a minute or two. We'll show results as soon as they're ready.
No matches for "" in this podcast's transcripts.
No topics indexed yet for this podcast.
Loading reviews...
ABOUT THIS SHOW
Own Your Identity empowers men experiencing same-sex attraction to live a life of purpose and possibility. Each episode contains actionable tools to keep listeners moving forward into the life they truly desire, through the power of Christ and for the glory of God.
HOSTED BY
Jason Mellard
Loading similar podcasts...
Frequently Asked Questions
How many episodes does Own Your Identity have?
Own Your Identity currently has 67 episodes available on PodParley. New episodes are automatically indexed when they're published to the podcast feed.
What is Own Your Identity about?
Own Your Identity empowers men experiencing same-sex attraction to live a life of purpose and possibility. Each episode contains actionable tools to keep listeners moving forward into the life they truly desire, through the power of Christ and for the glory of God.
How often does Own Your Identity release new episodes?
Own Your Identity has 67 episodes. Check the episode list to see recent publication dates and frequency.
Where can I listen to Own Your Identity?
You can listen to Own Your Identity on PodParley by clicking any episode. We provide an embedded audio player for direct listening, and you can also subscribe via your preferred podcast app using the RSS feed.
Who hosts Own Your Identity?
Own Your Identity is created and hosted by Jason Mellard.
URL copied to clipboard!