Pastor the People

Most husbands aren’t emotionally absent — they’re emotionally hidden. This episode pulls back the curtain on three things men rarely say out loud: the feelings they’ve been taught to suppress, the visual battle they fight every day, and how much a wife’s belief in them actually matters. An honest conversation for wives who want to understand, and husbands who want to be known.​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​

Many husbands want to lead their families spiritually, but have never been shown what that actually looks like. And most wives would love nothing more than for their husband to step into that role — they're just still waiting. Complementarian is a word that covers an enormous range — from something close to patriarchy all the way to marriages that look functionally equal in daily life. In this episode, Becky Brown (Women’s Ministry Director at New Valley Church) joins Scott to get honest about where they actually land, what Paul is really saying in Ephesians 5, and what spiritual leadership looks like — and doesn't — in a gospel-centered marriage.

What do you wish your husband actually knew? This is the conversation your wife has been trying to start for years — we're starting it for her. Joining us is Becky Brown, Director of Women's Ministry at New Valley Church. Mental load. Communication. Intimacy across the seasons of marriage. Spiritual leadership. And the one topic nobody talks about in church that came up anyway.

In the beginning of the Bible, we see the very first wedding ceremony. The woman is brought to the man, and they are gifted with a special, one-flesh kind of union. Genesis 2:24 says that this union is achieved as a man “leaves” his father and mother and “cleaves” to his wife. Scott and Hunter discuss how to leave well for your spouse and how to cleave well to them.

Mediocrity is a dangerous place to camp out in your marriage––but the real enemy is much closer. The sin within our hearts, the brokenness of our world, and the devil himself are all the true enemy of experiencing a flourishing marriage. Scott and Hunter discuss how, if you are in Christ, then you have a tremendous resource for overcoming these enemies: The very Spirit of Jesus himself, living within you.

What makes your marriage “successful”? If your goal is simply to make it––to stay married, and nothing more––then you are setting yourself up for disaster. The goal must not only be to avoid divorce but also to pursue a beautiful, biblical, flourishing marriage. Scott and Hunter discuss how we must resist the natural drift into mediocrity––at all costs.