The Compassionate Leader School Podcast

Your best people are leaving because of the ceiling.And in most cases, the ceiling has a name. It's the leadership capacity of the person above them. At some point, that person is you.In this episode, I go back to a phone call I received early in my career at IBM. A colleague named Ron, one of the most talented salespeople I'd ever known, told me he was leaving. He wasn't angry. He wasn't dramatic. He'd done the math, and the math told him there was no room to grow where he was standing. That conversation stayed with me for decades before I understood what it was really about.This episode names the pattern directly: your leadership capacity sets the ceiling for everything below it. Your team can't outperform your lid. Your results can't rise past it. And the people who carry the most potential are always the first to feel it, because they're the ones pressing hardest against the top.I talk about why this is so difficult to see from the inside. From where you're standing, things look stable. The systems are running and the team seems fine. What you can't see from that vantage point is the gap between where you currently are and what the people around you are capable of becoming.I also talk about Maxwell's companion law at the same foundational level: the Law of Progress. Raising the lid is a daily practice. It requires more than occasional leadership reading. I share the saying I grew up with: “you are who you do be with” and what it means to apply real discernment to your own development as a leader.In this episode:John Maxwell’s Law of the Lid and why the constraint is almost never the product, the market, or the teamThe two directions the lid shows up: the ceiling above you, and the ceiling you are for the people below youWhy talented people leave quietly, without drama, and why it’s rarely about the companyThe Law of Progress: what a daily practice of leadership development requires, and the discernment question most leaders skip“You are who you do be with” — what it means to be intentional about whose thinking you’re building your leadership onThis week’s permission: Your lid can grow but it won’t grow on its own. Ask yourself today: whose thinking am I in proximity to? Whose ideas am I building my leadership on? What rooms am I willing to walk into? You are who you do be with. Start there.

She sat across from me in our coaching session, frustrated with her team.She’d been trying to get everyone aligned on a point-of-sale upgrade for weeks. Different people wanted different things. Nobody was moving with urgency.I asked her: “Do you know which platform you want?”She said yes.“So what’s keeping you from making the purchase?” She paused for a long time.“Because I want it to be collaborative.”That answer is the whole episode.This week, I share the story of Trish, a retail business owner who arrived at her coaching session with a team problem. By the time we were done, she understood she didn’t have a team problem at all. She had a decision she hadn’t claimed. And underneath that: a fear so familiar, so thoroughly hers, that she couldn’t see it anymore.This episode names the pattern clearly: the difference between genuine collaboration — which needs the room, genuinely improves the outcome, and changes course based on what the team brings — and what I call accountability distribution, which looks identical from the outside but serves a completely different purpose. Both involve asking for input. Both produce meetings and conversations and feedback. The difference lives in one place: why you called the room.I talk about why this pattern always sounds like a virtue. “I value collaboration.” “I want my team to feel heard.” “If I just decide, they’ll feel dismissed.” Every one of these is real. Every one of them is also what the broken playbook built its entire case on because it knew that the safest rules to give women who lead are the ones that feel like values from the inside.In this episode:The difference between genuine collaboration and accountability distribution plus why they look identical from the outsideThe three phrases well-intentioned leaders use to justify keeping the decision open and what each one is actually protectingThe test question: “Do I need their information, or do I need their permission?”What the broken playbook taught women who lead about using authority directly and why the fear underneath became invisibleWhat happens when she makes the call and explains it clearly; and why it’s almost never what she expectedThis week’s permission: Make the call because the decision was always yours to make. Explain your reasoning with care. Let your team do what they’re there to do. You don’t have to announce that anything has changed. You just have to decide.

"It's just easier to do it myself than to try to explain it to them right now."It sounds like efficiency. It sounds like a leader with high standards who knows how to keep things moving. It sounds like someone who cares enough to make sure the work gets done right.It's also the reason your plate keeps growing and your team keeps waiting.In this episode, I share two stories. The first is Monica, a client who ran a small manufacturing company from an office on the plant floor, who was so far behind on her own core work she couldn't get to it because she was too busy solving every problem her team brought through her door. The second is from my own experience, managing a provincial election campaign and watching a rookie volunteer coordinator walk out of a thirty-minute conversation owning a solution he built entirely himself.The tool that made the difference is something I call the PAR Principle. It's a process for walking someone through their own thinking: from naming the problem precisely, to surfacing every possible course of action, to landing on a recommendation they can own and execute. Once you use it, you'll use it every time.This episode also names what it costs you when you don't. The late nights. The resentment you feel and then feel guilty about. The team that never develops because the leader keeps doing the developing for them.In this episode:Why solving every problem your team brings you teaches them to bring you every problemThe three reasons it keeps happening, and why every one of them sounds like responsibilityThe PAR Principle: how to walk someone through their own thinking in thirty minutes or lessWhat changes when they own the recommendation instead of executing yoursThe question that has never once failed to crack a conversation openThis week's permission: Stop solving. Start asking. The next time someone walks in with a problem, pause before you answer. Ask them what they think. Then wait. You might be surprised how much thinking was already there, waiting for permission to show up.

"I've mentioned it. I've been consistent about this. Why isn't it landing?"It sounds like patience. It sounds like leadership that respects the other person's capability. It sounds like giving someone the space to correct course on their own.So why are you not getting the result you're expecting?In this episode, I share the story of a senior team member I'll call Lily and what I had to learn, through real trial and error, about what a coaching conversation requires. Not a single mention. Not a series of softened reminders. A loop that stays open until you can both clearly see it no longer needs to.This episode names the pattern clearly: why well-intentioned leaders deliver the same message three times with diminishing clarity and call it consistency. I talk about the playbook that got us here, the one that told women who lead to be flexible, approachable, not too demanding. I also talk about what happens when that playbook runs in the background during a performance conversation. Where the message gets softened. Then softened again until the person on the other side isn’t receiving feedback. They’re standing in fog.And fog is unkind. Vagueness is mean.In this episode:Why repeating yourself with diminishing clarity is a very organized way of hoping and what coaching for performance actually requiresThe four stories women who lead tell themselves to justify not going back inWhat the loop looks like from the inside including the formal check-ins, the informal ones, and why both matterWhy both people in the room usually want to have the real conversation and what happens when one of them finally creates the conditions for itWhat you’re allowed to do when the first conversation doesn’t landThis week’s permission: Go back in. Say what you came to say, clearly, without apologizing for it. The first conversation is the starting line. Staying in it is the work. And being clear enough that the other person actually knows where they stand? That’s the kindest thing you can do.

 "We need to schedule a meeting about this." It sounds like initiative. It sounds like collaboration. It sounds like a leader who keeps her team moving.Sometimes it's a very organized way of not moving at all.In this episode, I share two stories from my own experience — one from my late twenties, when I accidentally ran the best volunteer committee meeting of my life, and one from a project team I've been co-chairing for several years. Both taught me the same thing, thirty years apart. When you know what result you're after before you walk in, everything changes. This episode names a pattern I see in leaders who are otherwise doing everything right: they call meetings without knowing what done looks like. They fill the hour because ending early feels like something went wrong. They invite the whole team to a decision that was always theirs to make, not because the group is needed, but because sharing the room feels safer than owning the outcome.I also talk about the version nobody names out loud. It's the meeting that exists not to get something done, but to avoid getting something done. It's the one that feels like work, looks like work, and keeps everyone just busy enough that nobody notices no one made the call.In this episode:Why a meeting without a clear result is an interruption with a calendar inviteThe three reasons leaders keep filling the time even when the work is doneWhat it costs your team every time they walk out of a room wondering why they were thereThe difference between genuine collaboration and calling a meeting to avoid making the callWhat you're allowed to do the moment the work is doneThis week's permission: End the meeting when the work is done. Not when the clock runs out. You don't owe the room a full hour. You owe your team a clear result. When you get there, let them go.

"She has so much potential. I just have a good feeling about her." It sounds like leadership. It sounds like generosity.It isn't.In this episode, I share a client story about a leader who hired the most energetic person in the room and spent the next three months doing two jobs. And a story from my own early career, sitting on a hiring panel at a post-secondary institution, watching a room of intelligent people convince themselves that enthusiasm was enough to teach and that we could build the instinct this candidate didn't have. We were wrong. The people who paid the cost were the students who had no say in the decision.This episode names the pattern clearly: hiring for potential over demonstrated results is one of the most common mistakes I see. And most leaders don't know they're doing it until they're doing two jobs and wondering how they got there. I name the four things leaders tell themselves when a hire isn't working, why each one feels logical in the moment, and what it costs when none of them turn out to be enough.I also share what hiring for results looks like, not as a concept, but as a set of concrete questions to ask before the job is posted and before anyone sits down across from you.In this episode:The 4 things leaders tell themselves when a hire isn't working and why none of them answer the only question that mattersWhy "quick learner" can be a warning sign, not a credentialThe question that tells you whether a struggling hire is a performance problem or a fit problemWhat hiring for results looks like before the job is posted, in the interview, and at 30, 60, and 90 daysThe difference between settled and comfortable plus why one of them tells you it's time to have the conversationThis week's permission: You are allowed to hire for what the role requires right now, not what you hope someone will grow into. Hiring for results isn't demanding. It's honest. And it's the kindest thing you can do for both of you.

 You’ve heard it. You’ve probably said it.“I’m meeting people where they are.”It sounds like compassion. It sounds like the kind of leader you’re trying to be.In this episode, I share what happened with a client who runs a plumbing and heating business with her husband. He pulled her aside one Tuesday afternoon and told her the team thought she was playing favourites. She thought she was meeting people where they were. The four people in her back office had been guessing for two years. The fix was a ten-minute conversation.This episode names the pattern clearly: when standards live only in your head, your team can’t see them, and they reverse-engineer the rules from what they can see. What they see, when you push your strongest performer harder than the struggling one, is favouritism. Your intent doesn’t change what the patterns look like from where they’re sitting.The leaders who do this are trying to be responsive to who each person is. They’ve confused fairness, which means applying the same standards consistently, with personality-based adjustments of the standards themselves. The cost lands on the strongest performer who feels used, the struggling performer who never finds out he’s underperforming until it’s too late, and everyone else who quietly concludes that accountability follows the person, not the work.In this episode:• The story of how a leader learned her team was calling her management style favouritism• Why “meeting people where they are” can read as the opposite of fairness from where your team is sitting• The trade-off between firm standards and flexible support, and what gets broken when you flip them• The three-rung excuse ladder leaders climb when standards live only in their heads• The ten-minute meeting that resets a team that’s been guessing for yearsThis week’s permission: You’re allowed to have standards that are clear and consistent. Ones that apply to everyone doing the same work. Naming them out loud, to everyone, at the same time, is finally being fair. 

"I just need to give it more time."It sounds like patience. It sounds like fairness. It sounds like the kind of measured leadership you're supposed to model.And yet it isn't.In this episode, I share the story of a community committee I stayed on four months longer than I should have while telling myself a different story every single month. It was a pattern I lived from the inside, until a very patient friend sat across from me and named it out loud.This episode names the pattern clearly: magical thinking in leadership is what happens when the story you're telling yourself feels more real than the evidence in front of you. It's the hope that the team member who promised to do better actually will — without a checkpoint, without a consequence, without any mechanism to ensure anything changes. Well-intentioned leaders do this constantly. They call it patience or fairness. They call it giving people a chance. What they're actually doing is protecting themselves from a discomfort that exists only in the story while guaranteeing themselves an ongoing, compounding one.The hope strategy isn't a strategy. And the women I coach already know that. They just haven't said it out loud yet.In this episode:Why the story always feels more real than it is and what it's actually costing youThe difference between reasonable patience and the hope strategy disguised as leadershipHow to distinguish a story from a fact and the one question that separates themWhat circle conversations are, why they create temporary promises without real change, and how to stop having themThe permission to operate from what you already knowThis week's permission: You don't need more evidence. You don't need more time. You're allowed to operate from facts.

Have you ever said: "I'm really trying to be better about work-life balance."It sounds like a boundary. It sounds like leadership. It sounds like the kind of honest, self-aware thing we're all supposed to say when we're trying to change.Well, it isn't.In this episode, I share the story of Carla, a leader who said the right words, meant every one of them, and watched nothing change. Why? Because what she was expressing wasn't a boundary. It was a wish. And the people around her, rationally and reasonably, believed what her actions told them, not what her words hoped for.I also share what happened in my own first year of teaching, with a student named Derek, and the moment I understood that what I thought was flexibility was actually unfairness — to him, and to every person who had respected a standard I professed but never held.This episode names the distinction clearly: a wish is passive. It hopes the other person adjusts. A boundary is active. It defines what you will and won't do; and it sounds completely different when you say it out loud.I talk about the four beliefs that keep well-intentioned leaders stuck in the wish cycle. None of them are about weakness, all of them are completely understandable, and every single one of them is wrong.And what it really costs: your energy, your trust, and the safety of the people who are quietly honouring a standard you stopped holding.In this episode:The difference between a wish and a boundary, and why the gap lives in what happens when it gets testedThe four beliefs that keep leaders from holding the standards they say they haveWhy "being flexible" is not the same as being fair and who pays the price when you confuse themHow to shift from managing other people's behaviour to owning your ownWhat deciding the standard before the conversation looks like in practiceThis week's permission: You are not responsible for managing everyone's disappointment. You are responsible for being clear. A boundary isn't harshness. Clarity about what is okay and what is not okay is kindness. Mean what you say and say it the first time.P.S. If this issue landed and you're ready to go deeper, I have something coming for you. The First Boundary: The One That Changes Everything is a micro training designed for exactly this moment — when you know you need one real boundary and you want to get it right. Details coming soon. Click here to get on the waitlist.

"We're like a family here."I spent 18 years inside a family-owned business saying those words. Believing them.I thought I was building culture and leading with care. I thought that was exactly the kind of leader I was supposed to be.I was wrong.In this episode, I share what I learned from the inside — 18 years of believing the family premise, then carrying it forward into my own leadership, and then having to unlearn all of it when I finally saw what it was doing to the people I was leading. The time I can't get back. The boundaries I never set. The guilt-based compliance system I inherited, believed, and quietly passed on.Nobody who does this is trying to manipulate anyone. The people I worked for were genuinely good people. That's what makes this pattern so hard to see. And so hard to stop.I name it directly in this episode: what "we're a family here" actually signals, why well-intentioned leaders keep reaching for it, and what it costs including the hard conversations you can't have, the standards you stop holding, and the betrayal that lands as personal instead of professional.And I draw the distinction that changed everything for me: the difference between a culture that feels like family — which is a natural outcome of leading well — and a culture you are trying to build into a family, which is a management strategy that eventually breaks everyone inside it, including you.In this episode:Why "we're a family here" is a red flag, not a culture strategy — and what it's really asking forThe invisible power dynamic family language creates, and why invisible power is more dangerous than named powerWhat this framing costs you as the leader: the conversations you avoid, the standards you abandon, the betrayal that doesn't land as a business problemThe difference between warmth as care and warmth as avoidanceWhat I do differently now and what you're allowed to build insteadThis week's permission: You are not their parent. They are not your children. The relationship you are building with your team is a professional one. That is not a lesser thing. Lead it like it matters — because it does.

"I should be grateful for the help." It's likely you've said this either to yourself or aloud to a confidante. It sounds like perspective, like a reasonable expectation. It sounds like the kind of grounded, non-perfectionistic leadership we're all supposed to model.Well I'm about to offer a different perspective.In this episode, I share Amanda's story rooted in three years of accepting 75%, fixing the other 25% herself, and calling it realistic. Then Shalini arrived. And the gap that had been invisible for three years became impossible to look away from. I also share the math I ran on my own settling, the year I worked every weekend and skipped vacation while telling myself it was just what leadership required.This episode names the pattern clearly: settling doesn't feel like settling in the moment. It feels like efficiency and kindness. It feels like the right response to gratitude or to someone who's clearly trying their best. But every time you fix the work instead of returning it, you're teaching that the standard is lower than it is. You're paying full salary for partial delivery and you're creating a problem you won't know how to name until someone who delivers at 95% walks through the door and makes the gap undeniable.I do the math that most leaders never run. And the number is not small.In this episode:Amanda's story — three years of settling, and what Shalini revealedWhy settling feels like kindness and lands like permissionThe actual math: what fixing it yourself costs over a month, a year, a teamThe moment my mentor made me run the numbers and what I saw when I didWhat "not settling" looks like in practice, starting with the first time the work isn't rightThis week's permission: You are allowed to send it back. The first time. Not the tenth. Clear standards are not perfectionism. They are the kindest thing you can do for your team and the most honest thing you can do for yourself.

You've probably expressed your desire not to micromanage. I get it. It sounds like trust. It sounds like empowerment. It sounds like the kind of confident leadership that gives people room to grow.It isn't.In this episode, I share Paula's story — four words, one upset client, and a Friday afternoon that unraveled a week of assumed alignment. Then I tell you mine. Twice. Because I learned the delegation lesson the hard way with Calvin (who you heard about in last week's episode), and then made the exact same mistake again with a peer director on a high-visibility project. Not a theory. A pattern I lived from the inside, more than once, before it finally changed my behaviour for good.This episode names the pattern clearly: delegation without follow-up isn't empowerment. It's abandonment. And so many women leaders who do it aren't being negligent. They're being conditioned. They've been told their whole lives not to be too demanding, too controlling, too much. So they overcorrect. They hand things off and disappear. They call it trust. The team experiences it as confusion: does this actually matter? Is the deadline real? And eventually, as the standard that's quietly lowering bit by bit.I draw the line that many leaders never learned: the difference between following up on outcomes and controlling how someone does the work. These are not the same thing. One is micromanagement. One is doing your job.In this episode:Paula's story — and what "handle it" actually communicatedWhy I made the same delegation mistake twice, with two different peopleThe real reason leaders skip follow-up — and why it has nothing to do with trustThe sharp, practical difference between micromanagement and accountabilityThe three check-in questions I use every time I delegate something that mattersThis week's permission: You are allowed to follow up. Checking the outcome is not the same as controlling the process. Your team wants to know the work matters. That's not micromanagement. That's leadership.

"I don't want to make things worse."This sounds like wisdom. It sounds like care. It sounds like the kind of emotionally intelligent leadership we're all supposed to practice.It isn't.In this episode, I share the story of the missed deadline that taught me one of the most important lessons of my career, not because the work didn't get done, but because of what Calvin said when I finally asked him why. Not a theory. A pattern I lived from the inside including the cringe-worthy moment when I realized the story I'd been telling myself was entirely my own.This episode names the pattern clearly: what gets called compassion is often conflict avoidance in disguise. Every leader I work with has a version of this story, the conversation she's been not-having for weeks, sometimes months. She's not doing it to be cruel. She's doing it to be kind. The problem is silence isn't kindness. It's permission. Permission for the problem to continue. Permission for the person to keep failing without knowing why. And it compounds, quietly, until it explodes.I share my client Victoria's story alongside mine — six months of avoiding a conversation that eventually cost her a major client and a team member who was blindsided. Then I walk through why avoidance persists, what it actually costs (research has a number for this, and it's not small), and the framework I use to start the conversations that matter.In this episode:The story of Calvin — and what he said that changed how I leadWhy avoidance gets mislabeled as kindness, and what it actually isThe measurable cost of every conversation you don't haveWhat happens to the team, the individual, and your own credibility while you stay silentA simple three-part framework for starting the conversation you've been putting offThis week's permission: You are allowed to have the conversation. Not when the timing is perfect. Not after you've scripted every word. This week. The goal isn't perfection. The goal is to stop confusing your silence with their protection.

How many times have you said:"I just need to find the right way to say this so nobody feels uncomfortable."It sounds like empathy. It sounds like self-awareness. It sounds like the emotional intelligence good leaders are supposed to have.It isn't.In this episode, I share the story of Lisa, a senior leader with ten years in her role, a growing client base, and an exhaustion she couldn't explain. Then I tell you why. Her male colleague made the same decision she did. His was called leadership. Hers was called aggressive. Not a theory. A pattern I lived from the inside and eventually had to name out loud before I could stop following it.This episode names the pattern clearly: the invisible playbook that women who lead inherit without knowing it and that drains them without their permission. These aren't character flaws. They're instructions. Instructions for staying manageable, staying likable, and staying small. You absorbed them from every mentor, every workplace, every correction you received when you took up too much space. And they feel like truth because you've been following them your entire career.I walk through the three behaviours that signal you're still inside the playbook and why they cost you more than you realize. The good news is this: once you can see the rules, you can choose not to follow them.In this episode:The double standard Lisa lived — and why it's not an isolated incidentThe three behaviours that reveal you're following a playbook designed to keep you smallWhy this pattern stays invisible — and why women often enforce it on each otherWhat it actually costs you to manage everyone's comfort while leadingThe shift from being liked to being effective — and why that shift is leadershipThis week's permission: You are allowed to stop playing by rules your male peers don't even know exist. You are allowed to have standards without apologizing for them. You are allowed to be direct, clear, and unapologetic about what you need. That's not rebellion. That's leadership.

I have all the content I need from the PDF already in context. Let me write this description now.Episode 00: The 15 Permissions — Why I Came Back, and the Truths That Started EverythingYou've heard it. You've probably said it."I just need to find a better way to balance all of this."It sounds like a strategy problem. It sounds like a time management problem. It sounds like the kind of leadership challenge that one good system or one good hire might finally solve.It isn't.In this episode, I tell you why I stepped away from this podcast for several years — and why I came back. What changed wasn't my schedule. What changed was my clarity about what women who lead are actually up against, and my willingness to say it out loud without softening it first. This episode is where that work begins.At the centre of everything I teach now is a document called The Permissions — 15 truths for women who lead that most of us were never supposed to claim. Not because they're radical. Because we were conditioned to believe we needed to earn them first. To be liked enough, experienced enough, certain enough. The conditioning runs deep. I know because I followed it for decades and I watched hundreds of capable women do the same.This episode names the pattern clearly: you are not exhausted because you're failing. You're exhausted because you've been operating from a playbook that was designed to keep you manageable. The 15 Permissions are the antidote. Not a framework. Not a system. A set of truths you are allowed to act on right now to run a real business with real standards, to lead the way you need to lead, to set boundaries without guilt, to make the uncomfortable call, to hold the line, and to do all of it while still caring deeply about the people you lead.Some of these will feel obvious. Some will make you want to argue. The ones that make you uncomfortable are the ones you need most. That's not a cliché. That's the diagnostic.In this episode:Why I stepped away from the podcast — and what brought me backThe broken playbook that's behind the exhaustion most women who lead can't quite nameAll 15 Permissions — read aloud and expanded, one by oneWhy resistance to a permission isn't a sign it's wrong — it's a sign you've been conditioned to believe something differentThe kind of leader these permissions are building — and why she doesn't wait for anyone's approval to beginThis week's permission: You don't need to earn these. You don't need to feel ready. You don't need anyone's sign-off. The only permission that matters from here forward is your own.

When it comes to boundaries, many people are frustrated, hurt and fed up because there are people in their lives - at work, at home, amongst friends, in their volunteer work, in their neighbourhood - who do not respect their boundaries. Well, there may be many reasons why this is happening including these top seven! In this episode I draw back the curtain on what they are and how you can course correct so that you can begin to set boundaries and finally have others respect them. 

When you get a notification for an upcoming meeting at work does it ever make you want to sigh and hope you might have a good reason at the last moment not to be there?  Believe it or not, there is an art and a science to planning and leading a productive, positive, and enjoyable workplace meeting whether your team gathers in person, virtually or as a blend of both. In this episode, I'm giving you ten key factors to consider when planning a meeting.  And I'm sharing what I call the 'difference maker' for meetings - my favourite tool to help everyone become engaged in the meeting from the outset and to find out what impact the meeting had before they leave. Let's get started...

Do you long for the best summer ever? Do you want to look back and feel proud of how you chose to spend your time, what you were able to accomplish, the fun you had, and the sense that you really spent your time well? That's exactly where I was  a couple of months ago as I began to up-level my planning for the summer of 2021 so I could enjoy time freedom and use a 10% intentional margin to allow for flexibility so that I didn't put myself into exhaustion and overwhelm - and the early reviews are five stars all the way! Tune in to this episode to learn how I approached it, the role Asana project management played (hint: it's  my new bff), and what this concept of intentional margin (versus unintentional margin where I'd have  committed myself at 120%) really works!

Which camp are you in: lover of all things networking-related or you’d rather have a root canal than attend a networking event? As part of the all-important relationship marketing strategy, being able to build real, authentic, reciprocal, meaningful and strategic connections with others who can help to support and grow your business is key to a business’ success. In this episode of the Compassionate Leader School Podcast, I’m offering ten simple and effective activities you can use to build your relationship marketing strategy today! 

Do you have an IEA? One of the hot topics in business these days is centered around building a marketing strategy based on a company’s ICA, which stands for Ideal Customer Avatar. More detailed and sophisticated than the typical target market analysis, the ICA work is making cash registers ring and companies are benefiting from more engagement from these loyal customers in all areas of their business. In that spirit, I’m asking the question about the other group of people who are key to your business – your employees. And I believe there are gains to be had from diving into identifying your IEA or Ideal Employee Avatar. If you’re concerned about how you’re going to be able to attract, not just people, but the best candidates and then retain them over the long term, this podcast will give you insight into where to start. 

No doubt at some point in your life someone has said to you, "it's not what you said, it's how you said it". I'm not sure you would be human if you haven't had that experience.  It speaks to the impact of our non-verbal communication. In this episode, I aim to help you be aware of the two key components of non-verbal communication and how, together, they influence the energy you bring into every single space you enter. If you've always wanted to understand why someone gave you that feedback about how it's not what you said... this is the episode for you!

Have you heard of the ‘one minute or less rule’ and how to practice it as the fuel for the Law of Action? In this episode of the Compassionate Leader School Podcast, you’ll learn about the Law of Action and have a list of 25 micro-habits to draw from to improve your workplace productivity and keep you on top of the things that can otherwise be stressors. 

If you're working to set realistic expectations with your team and you want to challenge them in a way that will move them beyond their comfort zone and  gradually get them there, check out this episode of the Compassionate Leader School Podcast. The model of 'Stretch, Risk or Die' can  help you strategize and give you both common language so you can navigate your way through. And if you've got what feels like a lofty goal you'd love to achieve, the model of stretch, risk or die will help you carve out the path to get there. So here we go!

Listening with empathy is a skill we all need if we want to be compassionate communicators. In this episode I talk about how we typically listen and respond autobiographically, when that's okay, and when we need to step up our listening skills and lean in with empathy. Learn about the three worst things to say; and at least three responses that will leave the other person feeling heard, respected and validated every single time. Here we go!

Do you believe that even though there will be challenges and obstacles you'll have to overcome, you will ultimately be successful? Or are you of the mindset that you hope things will go well but you tend to be inconsistent and possibly self-sabotage? You mean well and have a lot of energy when you start but somewhere along the way you lose steam or get discouraged and that leaves you feeling stuck. If that's you, this episode may be the opportunity you've needed to refocus. As always, I share stories of clients who have walked your path once they became willing to fully show up and to be consistent. As Larry the Cable Guy always says, get 'er done!

Which camp do you typically hang out in - camp scarcity or camp abundance? I called my business Abundant Living because I inherently believe in the principle of abundance. In this episode I talk about how I  believe there is enough for everyone and share examples of leaders who reached out to colleagues and competitors alike and asked them to join forces for everyone's benefit. If you tend to slide into thinking it's detrimental to collaborate with others for fear it will result in less for you or your business, I'm encouraging you to give this episode a listen. You just might walk away with a whole different perspective!

Have you ever found yourself in the situation where someone comes to you for help and their version of help is putting their problem in your lap with the expectation you'll now take care of it for them? Well, I've been there - more than once - and learned how to apply a simple technique called the PAR Principle to keep the accountability in their court. Have a listen and learn how this can completely change the way you handle these situations in the future; and how you get to play a key role in helping to build the other person's skills and confidence!

As a follow-up to episode #9, this episode comes back to the topic of setting clear and strong boundaries. Starting with how to know the warning signs when someone is crossing or pushing a boundary, I offer a 4-part formula for dealing with boundary crossers as well as a strategy for having a compassionate conversation with boundary pushers. This is another opportunity to build your skills as a candid and compassionate communicator as well as supporting you in your efforts to cultivate a healthy workplace.

I know...you're wondering what in the heck is "opening your donut" and what does that have to do with compassion resilience? With so many people experiencing fatigue from their jobs and businesses, and trying to avoid total burn-out, there has never been a more critical time to build compassion resilience muscles than now. In this podcast, I talk about this notion of compassion fatigue and share one of the strategies I've cultivated to support my own need for building more compassion resilience as a gift to myself as well as to those I care about.

Do you hunger to be a better communicator, especially with the employees who report directly to you? Drawing from my 35+ years of teaching and working one-on-one with individuals to help them develop and strengthen their interpersonal skills, I've heard the stories of how leaders struggle with giving thoughtful feedback, of providing instructions where the outcome is what they expected, of setting boundaries, of knowing how to ask for what they want, of working to strike the balance between doing what was best for the business and being fair to employee requests, of learning to say “no”, and so much more. In this episode, I begin the process of looking at where you need to start as I take you behind the scenes with Zoe and share how she transformed the way her employees and she communicated in their workplace. 

Do you remember those days when you first started your business and you wished you had someone to talk to, to answer a question, to seek guidance from? Or maybe that's you right now! This episode is an homage to the importance of your role in this village of business owners and provides ideas on how you can get the help you need and be a  champion for a fellow person in business. And if you've never heard of the importance of the 6 Handshakes Rule, have a listen!

This episode is dedicated to the women (although it doesn't exclude the men) who feel out of balance. It's one of the top reasons people come to me for life coaching and it seeps into practically every business coaching session I do with clients. Sharing the journey of a number of my clients, I walk you through the steps I recommend to get started on this path to living a balanced life.  I've also included a list of simple and effective strategies you can implement right away so let's get started!

Is this you? You share with someone an idea you’re playing around with and all of a sudden you’re feeling the pressure to act on it because people keep asking you what’s happening? So you stop talking about it? And exploring it? Join me for this episode where I take you through the journey of two clients and show you how their choice to invest in a specific period of time to explore all the possibilities led to the best decision for them in the end. Listen here and learn how to make better choices for those dreams you want to bring into reality! 

Melissa is a CGA-CPA with the federal government and has also been a long-time business owner with her company Melissa Kew Photography. Three months ago I did a video interview with her. At the time, we had just begun to live with the realities of businesses shutting job, people being laid off from work, compassionate leaders having to lay people off, business owners trying to figure out how to work remotely with their teams, and people feeling unsure and afraid about the future. Our video interview turned out to  be one of the most watched videos I’ve done to date. Well, it’s been over three months and we have shifted into what I call the "next normal". With many businesses re-opening and with people trying to make decisions about returning to work and planning for what is ahead, it was time to bring Melissa Kew back for a follow-up. With her down-to-earth, pragmatic and sensible advice, here’s our conversation.

Why are some people able to make incredible things happen in their lives? Why are there those who are born under a lucky star, who get all the breaks, and who seem to have life handed to them on a silver platter? The answer is rooted in the words of Stephen Vizinczey who said, “You must begin to think of yourself as becoming the person you want to be.” How do you do that? In today's episode, you'll learn how starting with understanding the power of intention and using your intentions as the steering wheel, you can upscale your personal and professional life.

How many of you have important dreams that you keep to yourself either because your self-talk means you don't have the confidence to share them with anyone or because history has taught you that they'll just get squashed? If that's you, you need to listen to this episode of The Compassionate Leader School Podcast. Learn why it's important to give your dreams a voice and how to go out building an abundant circle of support so that they can finally be shared with the world!

Given that our economy is on the path of re-opening, so many of us are struggling with making the right decisions for what is now being referred to as our “next normal”, especially in the face of not having full information, being overwhelmed with the sheer amount of information, wading through hearsay, trying to interpret poorly articulated guidelines, and so on. This episode is all about the importance of doing the work to gather  facts coupled with nurturing your self-talk to give you courage and help you make high quality, soul-satisfying choices that make your heart sing!

Do you suffer from having weak boundaries? In this week's episode, I'm talking about the emergence of compassion fatigue in light of the impact of Covid-19 and the importance of building our resilience muscles to be able to respond in a healthy way. In particular, I'm exploring one of the foundational strategies for building resilience, which is establishing, clearly communicating, and honouring our boundaries. With step-by-step guidelines, you'll know exactly what to do when it comes to setting your boundaries so that others can give you what you need.

If you've been wanting to figure out how to plan your work schedule in a way that optimizes your productivity, efficiency and creativity, this episode is for you! Learn how choosing themes and time blocking, batching and mega-batching around them can help you capture free time that I lovingly coin as "white space".

At the best of times, clearly and concisely communicating with others is challenging. Enter self-isolation and working remotely in the midst of the uncertainty surrounding the COVID-19 pandemic and these challenges become heightened. In this episode, I offer insight into what makes for effective communication and six specific strategies to help you be less defensive, especially when the other person is offering something that sounds like criticism.

In light of the COVID-19 global pandemic and the "new normal" of working remotely from home for so many of us, this episode offers guidance and 10 practical strategies you can implement right away to set you - and your family - up for success as you aim to be productive as you transition to working from your makeshift home office.

In the midst of the COVID-19 pandemic, I’ve been talking a lot  about being the bison and focusing on your circle of control. To support you in doing that, in this week’s podcast I’m offering six specific strategies you can focus on to help you show up as an open, fierce and compassionate leader in your work life as well as in your personal life in these really tough times.

In business, while creating a mission statement and a vision statement, identifying core values, and developing guiding principles are all important, the most fundamental piece you need to have in place is a clear understanding of your WHY – that answer to what really drives you to do what you do. And this WHY is a magnet for your loyal customers as well as for the those employees who want to work in your business (and will stay) when what you stand for aligns with what they believe in. Here are some links mentioned throughout the episode:Simon Sinek's workbook "Find Your Why"Episode #002: How Stay Interviews Help You Keep The Best Employees The Complete Guide to Stay Employees: https://debbie-lawrence.mykajabi.com/pl/145837

If you're someone who struggles with delegating tasks and responsibilities to your staff because either it hasn't always gone well in the past or there's too much at risk, this episode is exactly what you need. I'll walk you through the six levels of delegation and explain what to delegate, to whom, when to do so, and how to make your request so that the end result is exactly what you need. Sound impossible? Just click play:)When you're ready, go to https://debbie-lawrence.mykajabi.com/pl/146059 to get your free copy of the Six Levels of Delegation quick reference guide. Print it. Even laminate it! And place it somewhere in your workspace where you can quickly use it to help you delegate with ease!

If you're feeling the pressure of finding and keeping great employees, you'll want to listen to today's episode. I'll teach you about a retention strategy that's known as the "stay interview" and give you step-by-step guidance on exactly what to do to effectively use this tool with your team.Then go to https://debbie-lawrence.mykajabi.com/pl/145837 to download your copy of the freebie resource "The Complete Guide to Stay Interviews"!

In this introductory episode, I talk about why I created The Compassionate Leader School podcast. You'll learn about what it means to be an armoured leader and what it will take to begin to make the shift to showing up more compassionately!If you'd like be in the loop, go to https://debbie-lawrence.mykajabi.com/pl/146118 and sign up for updates. You'll receive an email as soon as an episode of The Compassionate Leader School Podcast has been dropped!