The Confessions of Spiffy Brumpkin

67 mustangs? Really? You'd bring that up when you KNOW my cousin was trampled by exactly that number of wild horses?? This is a new low. A new low. 

i would love to relax. that would be awesome but what you guys dont see is that my turtle sanctuary has been out of control lately. Dont even get me started on the ferns. plus the HOA keeps hazing me. Im typing this from the car because I need to bring jim (hoa captain) a carton of kools. Is this normal? if they find out about the turtle sanctuary im effed. Im supposed to get branded next week and I really dont want them to find out before that. that could be -- GET OUT OF THE ROAD! YOU ARE OLD AND I AM BEAUTIFUL! SO I DO HAVE THE RIGHT OF WAY. NO I DONT HAVE ANY TURTLES IN THE CAR. GET AWAY FROM ME I AM PERFORMING A CITIZENS ARREST I AM A SOVERIGN CITIZEN AND THERE'S NOTHING IN THE COUNTY BYLINES THAT SAYS ANYTHING ABOUT REPTILES--old people wandering the streets. at this hour. When i'm just trying to help out jim and the other hoa fellas. They care about me. They really do.

I'm sorry this took long to upload. I've been dealing with some stuff where my whole family is accusing me of disassembling all of my grandmother's furniture but I would never do something like that. My uncle was really a jerk about the whole thing. He threw me across the room witch caused more furniture to break and my family got madder. They can't prove it was me so WTF? AITAH ? (for disassembling/ breaking some heirlooms along with the furniture) ? ps. I didn't even leave any clues so wth? M37

god I hope nothing bad happens in this one. Seriously if anything bad happens I'm gonna lose it. If something even a little bad happens in this one I'm dissembling all the furniture in my grandma's house. Ok I'm going to click play now but it better just be a nice episode free of badness. But if not I'm holding my screwdriver. 

Consider this a declaration of war against any other foods content creator. I'm done keeping my opinions to myself, sitting in the corner with my thumb in my mouth. This is my chance. To talk about burgers. 

I wish I could meet a real life space alien and take a ride in his space alien car. Whats that? No I won't get off Santas lap thank you very much. I waited in line just like the rest of you. I pay taxes so I get to do this. It's like the fire department. 

Get it? Like podcast. The only difference is the word plane. It's a little play on words because this one actually takes place on an airplane. Nim wit. Edit 1: I'm sorry for saying nim wit. I'm trying to spread positivity and I should not have been bad.Edit 2: I'm also sorry for direct messaging people and calling them nim wits repeatedly over the course of the last 24 hours. It thought it was Serbian for "good guy"Edit 3: Okay, it's true. I knew it wasn't Serbian for "good guy" but I did it anyway because when I pressed "send" it felt like a bolt of lightning went through my body. I'd do it again in a heartbeat and I think cyberbullying might be a new passion of mine.Edit 4: Woah! Did not expect to get so much backlash. I didn't realize cyberbullying was so frowned upon in so many cultures. Guess it's time for me to learn from my mistakes.Edit 5: resaurants near me with big sloppy plates of food where the waitres r meen to you and spill onme 

Really? A cactus?? In this economy???  

Remember that orphan from the library episode? I really hope he's okay. 

Oh my god did you guys see that?? Oh my god I swear to god a little werewolf just ran across the room. Oh my god I didn't know they made werewolves that small. Oh thank god it's gone that was so scary I thought it was gonna eat me I was so scared Oh my god

WPPT's biannual monologue series broadcast live from dowtown Gunderson. Thoughtful conversations for curious minds. 

George Rockstuckle attempts to unseat reigning librarian Gloria Nicholson. A mandatory listen for any undecided voters out there. 

Buckle up partner. The zookeeper got the reigns and he's never giving em back. Shout out to the good people at Fanter. And a special thank you to all the McGillibusters out there. 

WARNING: Incredibly scary. Please don't listen if you or a loved one is prone to fear or scary type situations/occurrences. 

Don't touch that dial. 

Spiffy gets a new job, new friends, and a new outlook. The only thing that can stop him now is the crocodile in his mind. 

Spiffy takes a deep dive into his early days at school

The origins of Spiffy, the origin of man. Escaping the Denny's basement one podcast at a time.