The Essence of You Podcast

Sarah Cortez knew she wanted to be a pilot from the age of three, watching out the window of her dad's plane. It took her almost 40 years to act on it. In this episode, Sarah, a longtime sales professional, keynote speaker, and student pilot, joins Steph Lokelani to talk about what it took to finally start flying: clearing her schedule, ignoring the excuses, and pushing through nearly 200 two-week training cycles to earn her private pilot's license. Sarah shares the story of her dad's skepticism, a helicopter-pilot father with 1,500 skydiving jumps of his own, and how being told she didn't have the focus became the moment she stopped calling flying a "pipe dream." She and Steph swap adventure stories, from flying into the Grand Canyon at dusk to heli-snowboarding in Whistler, and dig into Sarah's work as fundraising chair for Women in Aviation Gem State Chapter, including the upcoming Girls in Aviation Day, on September 19, 2026.  About Sarah Cortez: Meet Sarah Cortez, the "GOALden Girl," a National award-winning sales professional and pilot with a remarkable journey. Moving an incredible 34 times before 5th grade, she developed adaptability and resilience at a young age.   With over 25 years of sales and management experience, Sarah's expertise shines through her training company, established in 2018. As a sought-after speaker and trainer, Sarah captivates audiences across the United States at national conferences, sales kick-offs, and company retreats. Her ability to inspire and motivate stems from her relentless tenacity in accomplishing her own GOALS. Beyond her sales career, Sarah's journey of becoming a pilot after the age of 40 exemplifies the power of self-belief, action, and surrounding oneself with remarkable HUMANs. The "GOALDEN GIRL" has formulated a winning approach to help others achieve greatness in their lives. She loves nothing more than helping others accomplish their BIG GOALS. Key Takeaways: - Action beats readiness. Sarah didn't wait to feel ready, she cleared her schedule and started studying six months after deciding to pursue her pilot's license, despite three kids, a full-time job, and a side business. - A "pipe dream" becomes real the day you stop calling it one. Her dad's doubt, and his honest explanation that she "didn't have the focus," became the turning point that made her commit. - Progress is a cycle, not a straight line. Sarah calls her approach "the art of achievement": take action, reflect, adjust, and take action again. However many cycles it takes. - Representation matters early. Through Girls in Aviation Day, Sarah has watched what happens when young girls see women in flight suits, cockpits, and maintenance bays: "if they can see it, they can be it." - A childhood of constant motion built resilience. Moving 34 times before fifth grade for her father's power line construction work taught Sarah to connect with people quickly and keep those connections going. - Signs can show up anywhere, even a coffee cup. While questioning whether to keep pushing toward her pilot's license, a Starbucks cup reading "stay the course" convinced Sarah she was on the right path. - Sarah's answer to Steph's closing question: at her core, she's a fun-loving, people-loving person who feels most herself in the air, on the snow, and grounded in her faith. Chapters: 0:00 – Cold open: meeting Sarah and her aviation dream 0:39 – Knowing she wanted to fly since age three 1:03 – Encouraging others to take action on their dreams 1:46 – Turning 40 and deciding "if I'm going to do this, I better start" 2:36 – Behind the yoke for the first time on her own 3:16 – Flight school: instrument rating and commercial training underway 6:59 – What Women in Aviation Gem State Chapter does 9:01 – 100,000 female pilots and counting 12:00 – Her dad's "when horses fly" reaction to her pilot dream 14:26 – Keynote speaking and sales training 15:01 – Girls in Aviation Day: growing from 150 to 250 attendees 17:16 – "If they can see it, they can be it" 18:11 – What flying feels like: total presence, total release 19:55 – A yoga parallel: losing yourself in the moment 20:36 – Flying into the Grand Canyon at dusk 24:03 – Flying into the backcountry: Indian Creek and smoke-filled skies 26:45 – What company would you fly for? 30:00 – Her kids' very different dreams: skiing, ranching, baseball 33:37 – Her dad's helicopter career and 1,500 skydiving jumps 34:39 – Heli-snowboarding in Whistler, BC 39:52 – Favorite Idaho flight: a solo cross-country to Coeur d'Alene 41:24 – Landing a Kodiak backcountry plane at Flying B 42:51 – Would she buy back her dad's old plane? 44:19 – A childhood of 34 moves before fifth grade 50:11 – Flying a Black Hawk during the "boss lift" 53:52 – A shoutout to Women in Aviation founder Sarina 1:02:23 – Closing question 1:03:53 – Outro

Steph Lokelani reunites with Angela Ocheltree, the oldest friend she's had on the podcast to date, for a warm, funny catch-up that doubles as a time capsule. The two met as seventh graders at Lakota Junior High in Federal Way, Washington, in the early '90s through drama club, and they trace the throughline from those teenage years to now. They swap stories about the theater kids they used to be (Godspell, Macbeth, and one unforgettable paper-mache head), an eerie coincidence involving Angela's adopted mother's birth family and the small Idaho town her parents happened to retire to, and the different roads that led them both into second acts later in life; Angela went back to college at 32 and lived in the dorms, while Steph built a filmmaking career after finishing her degree online through Full Sail University. Angela, now a sixth grade teacher working toward becoming a school librarian, talks candidly about budget cuts gutting librarian jobs in her district, what she's seeing as phones reshape her classroom, and how drama and choir saved her as a shy, insecure teenager. Both women open up about divorce, starting over, and raising kids the second time around. About Angela Ocheltree: Angela Ocheltree is an educator and aspiring storyteller based in the Pacific Northwest. With a decade of experience as a middle school teacher and theater co-director, she recently completed her library endorsement to transition into her dream role as a school librarian. Beyond the classroom, Angela is a creative who dabbles in many things; lately it is watercolor and writing. She also loves going to the theater, spending time with her family and friends, and traveling. As a mom of three, she balances her professional life with family adventures, sharing her love for everything from the stage to exploring the PNW. Angela is passionate about education, reading, and bringing curiosity to everyday life. Key Takeaways: - Reconnecting with an old friend can feel like time never passed. Steph and Angela met at Lakota Junior High in the early '90s through drama club and can still finish each other's stories decades later. - It's never too late to change paths. Angela went back to college at 32, living in the dorms her first year, after years as a pharmacy technician, and became a certified teacher in her mid-30s. - School libraries are quietly disappearing. Angela's district cut librarian positions from every middle and high school, leaving books checked in and out by non-certified staff while she finishes her own library degree. - Being in drama and choir can be life-saving for a shy kid. Angela calls theater the place she "got to be me," crediting teachers - including the choir director who recruited her - with shaping who she became. - Both women treat divorce as a turning point, not a failure. Each describes a first marriage that ended for the right reasons and a second chapter that fits who they've grown into. - Smartphones are reshaping childhood fast. Angela shares what she sees in her sixth grade classroom, from phone pouches to shrinking attention spans, and why she's in no rush to give her kids a phone. - Titles like "mom" and "teacher" don't erase who you are underneath them. Angela's answer to the closing question: at her core, she's someone who chases joy, creativity, and new experiences. Chapters: 0:00 – Cold open 0:11 – Welcome + meet Angela Ocheltree 0:42 – Sixth grade teacher, future school librarian 0:55 – How they met: Lakota Junior High, Federal Way 2:11 – What got her into drama club 3:02 – The coincidence of her parents landing in Emmett, Idaho 3:35 – Her adopted mom's birth family is from Emmett too 4:37 – "Felony Way": Federal Way's reputation today 5:39 – Wild Waves closing after 50 seasons 11:36 – Starting college at 32, living in the dorms 12:44 – Full Sail, HP, and Steph's own degree 14:46 – Co-directing school plays today 16:59 – Godspell: her favorite show, then and now 23:21 – Wanting to become a school librarian 23:38 – Budget cuts gutting school librarian jobs 30:20 – Teaching the five major world religions in 6th grade 38:49 – Josh: the friend who got her into choir 42:20 – Marriage, infidelity, and starting over 44:16 – Remarried and raising three kids 53:45 – How middle school has changed since the 90s 55:34 – Girls on the Mat: yoga, breathwork, facilitator training 57:34 – Smartphones and shrinking attention spans 59:07 – Phone pouches at school 1:01:49 – Disconnecting on a whitewater rafting trip 1:09:24 – Felony Way revisited and the empty mall 1:12:13 – First jobs: Izzy's Pizza and "pizza surprise" 1:20:09 – Closing question 1:26:20 – Full circle: daughters in theater, back on the stage 1:27:57 – How drama saved her life 1:32:37 – Outro

Sharmaine McWhite joins Steph Lokelani for a raw, funny, and unexpectedly deep conversation that starts with a joke about Social Security numbers and ends up covering nearly everything in between. Sharmaine, a multi-hyphenate creative, real estate agent, and content creator, opens up about growing up in a strict independent Baptist household that took her family from North Carolina to Alaska, where courtship replaced dating, skirts replaced pants, and an evangelist once arranged an introduction to a man she'd never met. She and Steph trade stories about leaving the church they were raised in, the lingering pull to "come back to the family," and what it was like discovering dating, intimacy, and nightlife for the first time in their 30s. The conversation moves through purity culture and the near-total absence of real sex education, the religion's stance on LGBTQ+ people, and the guilty pleasure of watching Xena and Will & Grace in secret. Sharmaine also talks candidly about her adult ADHD diagnosis, the years she spent calling herself lazy and forgetful before she understood why, and how she's built a life around protecting her passions from ever becoming a job. It's a conversation about faith, boundaries, identity, and the lifelong process of figuring out who you are once the labels come off. About Sharmaine McWhite Meet Sharmaine McWhite, a creative at heart who believes life is meant to be lived with both passion and purpose. An artist first, Sharmaine has also explored the worlds of modeling and acting, always looking for new ways to tell stories and express creativity. Professionally, she wears two hats as an Office Manager and Realtor, where she enjoys building relationships, solving problems, and helping others navigate life's biggest milestones. A proud Treasure Valley resident for more than 20 years, she shares life with her partner, their four cats, and their blended family of three incredible kids. She considers herself spiritual rather than religious and values authenticity, personal growth, kindness, and meaningful connections. Whether she's creating art, helping clients, or simply sharing pieces of her journey, Sharmaine hopes to inspire others to embrace every part of who they are. Key Takeaways - Don't turn your passion into your job. Sharmaine keeps her artwork unmonetized on purpose. Once something becomes how you pay the bills, she argues, it stops being a passion. - Purpose doesn't have to be your career. Sharmaine defines her own purpose simply as living a good life and being happy, pushing back on the cultural pressure to find purpose through work. - Leaving a high-control religion doesn't mean losing your family. Both women describe staying close to parents who remain devout, and the ongoing tension of being told to "come back to the family." - Purity culture left both guests without real sex education - Song of Solomon and secretly-watched TV were their main exposure to the subject growing up. - A boundary is your responsibility, not a demand that someone else change. Sharmaine's framework: decide in advance how you'll respond if the behavior continues, and follow through. - An adult ADHD diagnosis reframed years of self-blame. Sharmaine talks about being called lazy and forgetful long before she understood the dopamine and working-memory science behind it. - Change is core to identity. Chapters 0:00 – Cold open: the Social Security number game 3:49 – Welcome to The Essence of You + how they met 5:05 – Defining passion vs. purpose 7:33 – "Don't make your passion your job" — the painting she gave away 10:02 – Content creation as the day job, filmmaking as the passion 12:03 – Leaving religion: from North Carolina to Alaska 14:09 – Strict rules: skirts only, no shoulders, no dating 16:21 – "It was a cult": courtship, control, and the Duggars comparison 17:31 – Homeschooling, undiagnosed ADHD, and being the only sibling to graduate 19:55 – An evangelist arranges an introduction to a stranger 22:18 – Confronting race within the religion 24:20 – The Valentine's gifts that crossed a boundary 26:50 – Making her dad end the relationship for her 27:54 – Moving out and starting over at 26 29:29 – The theological question that cracked her faith 33:12 – Steph's own exit from evangelical Christianity 34:03 – "Come back to the family" - the ongoing pull 36:04 – Losing her virginity at 31 and discovering her 30s 38:56 – "This is none of your business" - confronting her parents 41:27 – What the religion (and her family) believes about LGBTQ+ people 44:57 – Purity culture, no sex ed, and Song of Solomon in secret 48:03 – Xena, Will & Grace, and secretly loving queer media 51:00 – Leaving sales, open relationships, and craving variety 53:01 – Getting an ADHD diagnosis as an adult 58:26 – Called "lazy" her whole life 1:03:42 – Closing question 1:08:23 – Outro

In this episode of The Essence of You, host Steph Lokelani sits down with Karin Henniges, the mother of Episode 3 guest Angela Reish, who is visiting from her home in Oregon, by way of a life that has spanned three countries. Karin shares her story of growing up in Hanover, Germany as the only girl among three brothers, meeting her husband Mike (whose real name, Reinhold, she didn't learn until they sat down together to fill out immigration paperwork), and starting a marriage with almost nothing, a one-bedroom apartment, a shared bed, and a leap of faith to Canada in the dead of winter. Karin walks through decades of building a life from scratch: Mike's brutal six weeks working the Dew Line near the Arctic Circle, years of scraping by on a dollar an hour, the devastating loss of their infant son to pneumonia, and the slow climb toward stability that eventually carried the family to the United States in 1968. She speaks candidly about the push and pull of a traditional marriage, being told when she could and couldn't work, and the compromises that shaped decades as a wife and mother. The conversation then turns to Mike's decline and passing in 2008, and later circles back to tell that story in fuller detail. From a small, telling moment at an Apple Store that revealed the end was near, to the family's decision to honor his wish to stop treatment and die at home. Karin describes donating his body to science, receiving his ashes, and - with her sister-in-law's blessing eventually - scattering them in the lake in Hanover where she and Mike first met, technically against German law. Since becoming a widow, Karin has built an entirely new chapter: months-long trips through Europe with a close friend, a promise to always show up for her grandchildren the way her own parents couldn't do for theirs, deep friendships in her Woodburn, Oregon community, and a hard-won sense of independence. The episode closes with Steph's signature question - who are you when everything external falls away - and Karin's answer about discovering, for the first time in her 80s, who she is outside of being a wife or a mother. About Karin Henniges: German Immigrant Karin Henniges, born at the end of WWII, now in her late 80s, shares her story of immigration and life (Karin said all in one breath). And that's her bio. Key Takeaways: Karin's story is a reminder that identity can take a lifetime to find, and that it's never too late to claim it. A few things that stood out: - Karin spent decades as "his wife" and "their mother" before getting the chance to simply be Karin. She credits the years since becoming a widow with finally showing her who she is at her core - sarcastic sense of humor, love of travel, and all. - Immigrating twice, first to Canada and then to the United States, meant starting over financially again and again. Karin recalls coming home from a visit to Germany with just two dollars left in the bank, and Mike working a week and a half just to cover a month's rent. - The loss of an infant son to pneumonia is woven into the family's larger story of resilience -a loss Karin doesn't dwell on, but doesn't hide either. - Karin made a lifelong promise to be present for her grandchildren after realizing her own parents, who stayed behind in Germany, never really got to know theirs. She now visits all three grandkids regularly, including an annual beach trip tradition with her grandson that's now ten years running. - When Mike's health declined, the family honored his explicit wish to stop treatment and die at home rather than in a hospital, a decision Karin later helped her sister-in-law understand when she faced the same choice for her own husband years afterward. - Karin scattered Mike's ashes in the lake in Hanover where they first met, technically against German law, wrapped in flowers picked for each family member - an act of quiet defiance that felt true to who he was. - Friendship, especially friendship that belongs entirely to her rather than being inherited from marriage, has become one of the most important parts of Karin's life in her 80s. Chapters: 00:00 -Welcome and introducing Karin 00:25 - Growing up in Hanover: the only girl with three brothers 01:38 - Meeting Mike (really Reinhold) and falling for someone different 03:50 - Deciding to immigrate to Canada 04:22 - Filling out paperwork and learning his real name 05:40 - Arriving in Canada unprepared, in the dead of winter 07:02 - Mike's six weeks on the Dew Line near the Arctic Circle 08:20 - Building a life on a dollar an hour 10:59 - The loss of their infant son to pneumonia 11:18 - A move to Calgary and a fresh start 12:03 - First trip home to Germany, and $2 left in the bank 12:44 - Deciding to immigrate again, to the United States 14:01 - Settling in San Jose and navigating a traditional marriage 14:45 - Being told when she could and couldn't work 16:52 - His own business, 20-hour days, and declining health 17:35 - Moving through Paradise, California, and on to Woodburn, Oregon 18:35 - Mike passes away in 2008; Karin becomes a widow 19:44 - Choosing what to do with her freedom, and a friend moves in 20:07 - A three-month journey across Europe begins 22:03 - San Sebastian, Easter mass, and a hard-won cathedral visit 24:20 - Florence, Christmas markets, and a truck attack they narrowly missed 26:37 - Hanover's Christmas market and Angela's upcoming trip 29:31 - The travel partnership fades; Karin moves to independent living 31:15 - Grandchildren, and the promise to always be there for them 34:22 - A ten-year tradition with her grandson at the Oregon coast 35:07 - Sarah, Cole, and relationships with her sons-in-law 36:14 - Money worries, rising rent, and staying close to friends 38:33 - Reflecting on the "middle years" and hard-won independence 39:56 - Steph reflects on her own freedom since her divorce 41:10 - The Apple Store story that signaled the end was near 42:44 - The family's decision to honor his wish to stop treatment 43:39 - Hospice, applesauce, and the moment they knew 44:38 - Passing away at home and donating his body to science 46:05 - The certificate, the spinal cord, and what it meant 47:27 - Angela's suggestion: take him home to Hanover 48:39 - Scattering his ashes in the lake where they met, against the law 50:29 - Sister-in-law Erica's slow understanding 51:37 - "It didn't cost me a dime" 51:58 - Eerie signs: the closet light that wouldn't stay off 53:05 - A promise made from his hospital bed 53:44 - The core question: who are you when everything falls away? 55:49 - Closing thoughts and thanks

In this episode of The Essence of You Podcast, host Steph Lokelani sits down with Boise hip-hop artist and community builder Cornell Johnson, known on stage as ZERO Wan-Kenobi. Cornell opens up about how he found his voice through music with the Earthlings crew, why he believes Boise's creative community needs to support each other instead of competing, and how writing a song for his mother after her passing in 2020 taught him to "cultivate light out of darkness." The conversation moves into Cornell's work with the Rap America Project, a youth rap camp he's helped grow for three years, teaching kids and adults everything from lyric writing to stage performance to the business side of music. He shares candid, unfiltered stories about a frightening health scare in August 2024 that led to a brain injury diagnosis, his ongoing recovery, and the daily disciplines, including the philosophies of Kaizen (getting 1% better each day) and Mushin (learning to sit with an impulse instead of reacting to it), that have carried him through sobriety and healing. Cornell also reflects on fatherhood, his path from San Bernardino, California to Boise, Idaho, the creation of his ZERO persona, and what it means to build something bigger than himself alongside his bandmates. This is a raw, honest conversation about resilience, community, and choosing hope even when it's hard. Connect with Cornell/ZERO Wan-Kenobi: Spotify, Apple Music, and all streaming platforms as ZERO Wan-Kenobi. Instagram and Facebook: @ZEROWanKenobi. Also find his collective, Earthlings Crew, on all streaming platforms and Instagram @EarthlingsCrew. https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61577901365873 https://www.instagram.com/zerowankenobi/ https://open.spotify.com/artist/4YaAeSvsANE45PtM3Lwj6H?si=hbKsYIk5Rv6Ny37kjT5Riw   About Cornell Johnson, AKA ZERO Wan-Kenobi: Born in 1986 in San Bernardino, California, Cornell Johnson aka ZERO Wan-Kenobi, is a hip hop artist based out of Boise, Idaho. Influenced by artists such as Talib Kweli, Mos Def, Common and many other conscious artists, ZERO takes his artistry into a new dimension. Finding ways to heal with real life stories told in his music which resonate with a refreshingly real honesty. Learning to live and living to learn. Key Takeaways: - Community over competition: Cornell believes Boise's music and hip-hop scene thrived most when artists showed up for each other, and that "repping a city" means investing in that city's community, not just chasing views and likes. - Creating light out of darkness: After losing his mother in 2020, Cornell couldn't write or create for a while. Writing a song for a friend, and, in turn, for his mom, became the moment he realized he could turn his own grief into something that helps other people heal. - The Rap America Project: A youth (and now all-ages) rap camp founded by Brenda Francis that Cornell has helped lead for three years. Participants learn lyric writing, stage performance, beat-making, and the business side of music, and perform an original song by the end of camp. Local sponsors like Idaho Pizza Company and Jersey Mike's fed the kids so no one went without lunch, something Cornell connects directly to his own experience of food insecurity growing up. - A frightening health scare: In August 2024, after quitting alcohol and multiple medications cold turkey, Cornell went into shock and experienced what he describes as "feeling life leaving my body." It marked the start of an ongoing journey toward a brain injury diagnosis and recovery, including a severe concussion in January 2025 and a lapse in insurance/medication access in mid-2025. - Kaizen and Mushin: Two philosophies that have anchored Cornell's recovery. Kaizen means getting just 1% better each day through small, sustainable choices. Mushin (a concept he ties to "no mind") is about noticing the pause before an impulsive action and choosing to sit with discomfort rather than react to it. - The origin of "ZERO": Cornell created his stage persona, ZERO Wan-Kenobi, as an outlet distinct from who he was during his heaviest drinking years. Sharing his vulnerability, fears, and mistakes through music became a way to connect with others who felt broken. - Hope as a discipline, not a feeling: Cornell describes himself as "the hopeless hopeful," someone who chooses hope and shows up for good even when the world feels heavy. His closing message: "You have every reason to be okay." Chapters: 00:00 - Cold open & pre-show banter 01:16 - Welcome & meet Cornell Johnson, aka ZERO Wan-Kenobi 02:45 - How ZERO got into music and joined the Earthlings crew 04:28 - The state of Boise's hip-hop and music community 08:53 - Cultivating light out of darkness: losing his mom in 2020 12:16 - The origin of the Rap America Project rap camp 16:20 - Year two: bringing in the Earthlings crew as teachers 18:43 - Year three: the most prepared and successful camp yet 21:59 - Shoutout to sponsors: Idaho Pizza Company & Jersey Mike's 23:42 - Staying present and finding joy in small moments 28:56 - Confession: hip-hop isn't even his favorite music genre 29:52 - A quick history of hip-hop and why he does it for the culture 31:28 - Opening up about his 2024 brain injury and health scare 39:06 - A second setback: a severe concussion in January 2025 41:58 - Losing insurance, losing medication, and the slow decline 44:19 - Getting back on track and preparing for a doctor's appointment 46:53 - Money, gas prices, and the cost of everyday necessities 53:18 - The Kaizen philosophy: getting 1% better every day 54:49 - Mushin: sitting with the pause before an impulsive action 56:30 - Where his personal story intersects with his work 59:52 - Getting sober in 2019 and how music changed 1:00:54 - Creating the ZERO persona 1:03:01 - How the 2024 breakup and health scare connect 1:03:22 - Making music bigger than himself, with his brothers 1:05:22 - Choosing hope and carrying yourself with love 1:06:18 - Who is ZERO at his core? 1:08:12 - Where to find ZERO Wan-Kenobi and Earthlings Crew 1:09:00 - Closing thoughts

"You can't be triggered if you're not cocked." That's the kind of line Nichole Stull drops mid-conversation - half punchline, half life philosophy. In this episode, Steph sits down with improv artist and filmmaker Nichole Stull, who's spent decades shaping the visual world of indie film and TV (including the demon-driven color palette of "259") while also teaching storytelling and applied improv alongside her husband Jared for the last 25 years. The conversation moves fast and goes deep. Nichole breaks down the "Story Spine," the improv-born storytelling framework Pixar built its scripts on, and why an alien can absolutely show up in a Western - as long as you've earned it. She talks about running her kids' school book fair for 13 years and how she went from devouring every Sweet Valley High book in existence to being a member of an early-2000s online Twilight book club. Get this: with Stephenie Meyer posting in it! From there, Steph and Nichole don't shy away from harder territory: library censorship, what kids actually have access to online, and a remarkably candid conversation about pornography, intimacy, and the industry behind it. Nichole shares how she talks to her five kids, ages 7 to 22, about sex, alcohol, and modesty without ever making any of it feel forbidden. The back half turns personal. Nichole tells the story of a devastating junior high year, a friend's sudden death, and the summer she decided who she wanted to be walking into high school. It's a story about identity and reinvention that still shapes how she raises her own kids today. It's a masterclass in reframing trauma, taking responsibility for your own triggers, and understanding that every one of us, just by moving through life, is going to make ripples. The episode closes with one final question: when you strip away every label and title, who are you at your core? Nichole's answer, rooted in her LDS faith and years of internal work, redefines the difference between pride and humility. It might even change how you think about your own worth. About Nichole Stull: Nichole believes that every human on the planet would benefit from improv, because life is improvised and improv teaches us all how to react with love, laughter, forward motion, and purpose. Nichole has been teaching and using improv for performance, leadership, team development, and group connection for 25 years. As a speaker, trainer, and facilitator, Nichole loves helping business owners, community leaders, youth, and families find common ground, fun, and deliberate action to strengthen bonds and purpose. Nichole is also an actor, writer, director, and filmmaker who specializes in storytelling as a way to connect humans. She is fortunate to partner in business and life with her husband, Jared, and their five kids who are almost always amazing. In the last few years Nichole has taken big action to be pro-active in cancer prevention and feels passionately about patients getting all the info they need clearly, concisely, and completely to make choices confidently. Key Takeaways: - The "Story Spine" framework (used by Pixar) can turn any idea into a compelling story: establish the normal, introduce a change, and show how each response builds until a new normal is reached. - A story can absolutely break its own rules, you just have to earn it. Set the stage before you introduce the unexpected. - What a story "means" is shaped as much by the audience's life experience as by the storyteller's intent. - Trigger warnings have a place, but no one else is responsible for your internal reaction; that's inner work only you can do. - You can't move through the world without creating ripples. Being afraid of your own impact isn't humility, it's fear. - Pride and humility aren't opposites. The real opposite of pride is self-hate, while humility is holding your own value and everyone else's at the same time. - Every one of us carries trauma, even the moments that feel "normal" in hindsight. What matters is how we choose to tell the story afterward. Chapters: 00:00 - Behind the Scenes: Costume, Color & the Craft of Indie Filmmaking 07:21 - The Story Spine: Storytelling Tools from Improv to Pixar 19:02 - The Book Fair, Reluctant Readers & "Beware the Anti-Reader" 23:34 - Harry Potter, Twilight & a Surprise Book Club with Stephenie Meyer 32:24 - Library Censorship and Kids' Access to Information 35:56 - A Frank Conversation on Pornography and Intimacy 42:02 - Raising Teens: Honest Talks About Sex, Alcohol & Choices 45:40 - Trigger Warnings and Owning Your Own Reactions 51:58 - The Swimming Pool Analogy: Permission to Make Ripples 58:52 - Everyone Has Trauma. It's How We Tell the Story 1:01:12 - Nichole's Turning Point: Loneliness, Loss & Choosing Who to Become 1:10:04 - What We Choose to Put Out Into the World 1:12:21 - Final Question

Art Burns spent years in New York's high-pressure advertising world before addiction and burnout brought him to his knees, and to mindfulness. Today he's a certified mindfulness meditation teacher and founder of Alicia's Angels, a nonprofit bringing guided meditation, self-compassion coaching, and community support directly into chemotherapy infusion centers. In this conversation, Art shares the story of Alicia, the client whose journey inspired the organization's name, and unpacks how mindfulness helps cancer patients and their families soften anger into acceptance, release the "cancer as identity" trap, and find beauty even in life's hardest moments. Steph and Art talk honestly about supporting loved ones through illness, the neuroscience behind rewiring the brain through practice, and why real presence matters more than having the "right" words. Whether you're navigating a diagnosis, supporting someone who is, or just want practical tools for showing up more fully in your own life, this episode offers both heart and hard science. Learn more about Alicia's Angels: https://aliciasangels.com/ ABOUT ART BURNS: As a certified mindfulness meditation teacher, Art draws upon his traditional Catholic upbringing, combined with his extensive studies in the Eastern philosophies of Taoism, Hinduism, and Buddhism, to spiritually connect with people from every background. Through the language of their religious and cultural experience, Art helps people understand the universal laws of spirituality to help bring them to a place of physical and emotional wellbeing. Art resides in Colorado with three cats.  🔑 KEY TAKEAWAYS - Alicia's Angels brings free mindfulness meditation, self-compassion coaching, and community into chemotherapy centers and virtual sessions for patients, families, and caregivers. - A cancer diagnosis doesn't just affect the patient, it ripples through family members, friends, and coworkers in ways that are easy to miss. - The most helpful thing you can offer someone facing illness isn't advice or errands, it's honest, judgment-free presence and active listening. - Mindfulness isn't about controlling your thoughts; it's about noticing when your attention wanders and gently returning, it's a "muscle" you build with practice. - Neuroplasticity research shows consistent meditation practice measurably changes brain activity, even outside of meditation itself. - Self-compassion follows a simple three-step practice: acknowledge the struggle, remember you're not alone in it, then offer yourself comfort. - A diagnosis (or any role we play) doesn't have to become our whole identity, it is one thread in a larger tapestry. ⏱️ CHAPTERS: 00:00 - Cold Open: Meet Art Burns & Alicia's Angels 00:29 - The Story Behind Alicia's Angels 05:53 - Inside the Program: Meditation, Coaching & Community 08:52-  How a Cancer Diagnosis Ripples Through the Family 16:48 - What to Say (and Not Say) to Someone with Cancer 20:23 - From Advertising Burnout to a Mindfulness Practice 31:07 - When Illness Becomes Your Identity 37:05 - The Power of Presence Without Judgment 44:52 - Alicia's Words: From Anger to Compassion 48:02 - The Self-Compassion Practice 53:29 - The Neuroscience of a Rewired Brain 57:03 - Small Daily Practices That Change Everything 1:03:01 - Judgment, Traffic Jams & Seeing the Beauty in What Is 1:08:28 - Closing Question: Who Are You at Your Core?

This episode kicks off with a cold open - Steph and Chance Fuerstinger re-discovering their unlikely shared connection to Grand Junction, Colorado, before the mics officially turn on. Actor, writer, filmmaker, and acting teacher Chance Fuerstinger joins Steph Lokelani for a conversation that moves from the craft of storytelling to the harder work of understanding yourself. Chance breaks down the Meisner technique, why "the dialog is bullshit" (the truth underneath it is what matters), and the running joke of being crowned Boise's sixth-funniest person. From there the conversation turns to real life: walking away from a soul-crushing job in medical billing, rewriting a fantasy novel first drafted at 16, and directing documentaries about stories that deserve to be told without an agenda attached. The episode closes on the question this podcast always asks: who are you when the titles fall away? Chance talks candidly about the ongoing work of self-discovery, including a recent diagnosis that helped some long-standing pieces click into place, and learning to set boundaries with the people closest to him. About Chance Fuerstinger: Chance Fuerstinger is an international award winning actor, writer, and filmmaker. He lives in Kuna, Idaho with his husband and their three demon cats. He is an instructor at Boise Acting Studio. He spends his free time acting and directing for local community theatres in the Boise area and is currently serving on the board of directors at Boise Little Theater. Passionate about his craft, Chance lives by the mantra, "If you know everything there is to know about acting, you should stop acting." Outside of acting, Chance is hard at work on a fantasy novel. 💡 Key Takeaways - Acting method matters less than presence - Chance's Meisner-based approach centers on truly listening to your scene partner and building real imaginary circumstances, not performing emotion. - "The dialog is bullshit" - the words characters say matter less than the truth underneath them; playing the subtext is the actual job. - Walking away from a stable but miserable career opened space for teaching, writing, and acting full time. - Writing a novel is a different muscle than writing for stage or screen - you're the one painting the whole picture, inner monologue and all. - Feedback is only useful if you actually want it - Chance talks through learning to ask for, and sit with, honest critique. - Self-discovery isn't a finish line, it's an ongoing practice, done creatively and in public, and it includes learning to set boundaries with the people closest to you. ⏱️ Chapters 00:00 – Cold Open: The Grand Junction Connection 03:56 – Welcome & Meeting Chance Fuerstinger 19:39 – Boise's Funniest Person & Returning to Comedy 31:59 – Chance's Acting Method (Meisner Technique) 39:27 – Theater Etiquette & Staying Present On Stage 47:10 – Teaching Acting for Stage vs. Film 53:22 – Documentary Filmmaking & Stories Worth Telling 57:58 – Rewriting a Novel Started at 16 1:04:45 – Leaving a Soul-Sucking Job for Creative Freedom 1:12:46 – Feedback, Killing Your Darlings & the Writing Process 1:19:57 – Dream Roles 1:26:37 – Who Are You At Your Core?

Joey Maxey wears a lot of hats - actor, filmmaker, dancer, cosplayer, and host of the vintage jigsaw puzzle YouTube channel Janky Puzzles. But ask him what he's proudest of, and he'll tell you it's his job as an elementary school janitor. In this episode, Steph Lokelani sits down with her longtime friend and collaborator to trace a career that's gone from indie feature films (including their own "Retreat" film) to retail, a hospital front desk, and a dream job delivering mail for the USPS, cut short by an epilepsy diagnosis. Joey opens up about being homeless and sleeping in his car, losing both parents, and the piece of advice from his grandmother that changed how he thinks about happiness altogether: stop chasing it, and chase contentment instead. Steph and Joey also get into the craft side of filmmaking - lighting, method acting, and why a well-run set matters - before landing on the deeply human question Steph asks every guest... listen to find out what it is. About Joey Maxey Joey Maxey is the goofy but lovable TV Dad in this situation comedy of life, one in which he relishes being the supporting character of a show that’s not his. He loves listening to people’s stories, learning about their hobbies, and sharing in those mutual experiences.  From community theater, independent films, burlesque reviews, stand up comedy, movie podcaster, he has carried many “dashes” in life. Currently he is the host of the YouTube show “Janky Puzzles”, exploring the world of vintage jigsaw puzzles of all things, who knows what buffoonery will come his way next.  He is a family man, a creative, a janitor, but most of all…alive. Which is pretty cool. 📌 Key Takeaways Career reinvention is rarely a straight line — Joey's path wound through retail, a hospital, a school, and the post office before he found his favorite job yet. A life-altering diagnosis can force a pivot you didn't choose, and that's okay. Chase contentment, not happiness — happiness is a moving target, contentment is something you can actually hold onto. The most "unglamorous" jobs can be the most meaningful ones. Hard seasons (grief, homelessness, hardship) don't have to define you, and acknowledging them doesn't mean minimizing them. Small, weird, specific memories — a chili contest, a truck-stop rib dinner — often mean more than the big bucket-list wins. Curiosity and not taking yourself too seriously might be the whole secret. Check out Joey's YouTube Channel, Janky Puzzles! https://www.youtube.com/@JankyPuzzles ⏱️ Chapters 0:00 – Cold open & pre-show banter 1:42 – Welcome to the show & how Joey and Steph met 3:23 – Making "Retreat" - their first film together 7:11 – The craft of low-budget filmmaking & staying present as an actor 12:58 – Lighting, gaffers, and why practical light matters 16:21 – Joey's official bio (and unofficial titles) 17:19 – 24 years in retail, then a hospital and a school 24:15 – The dream job that got cut short and an epilepsy diagnosis 28:33 – Why being a school janitor is the best job Joey's ever had 38:49 – Grandma's wisdom: chase contentment, not happiness 50:53 – Janky Puzzles: Joey's vintage jigsaw puzzle YouTube channel 51:49 – The wild true story behind Thomas Kinkade 1:03:03 – Mental health, hard seasons, and finding gratitude anyway 1:13:56 – Who is Joey Maxey at his core? 1:17:04 – Check out Janky Puzzles + final thoughts

In this episode of The Essence of You Podcast, host Steph Lokelani sits down with her friend Celia Espinoza, a finance officer at Idaho Housing and Finance Association, for a heartfelt conversation about culture, identity, and the winding paths that lead us home to ourselves. Steph and Celia first connected through the Boise Metro Chamber's b|Wise mentorship program, and their friendship has only deepened since. Together they explore what it means to feel disconnected from your heritage while living far from your roots, and how food, music, family rituals, and even a spontaneous trip to Mexico City or Hawaii can reconnect you to where you come from. Celia opens up about a life-changing trip to Standing Rock in 2016, a period of homelessness that followed, and the full-circle career journey that eventually led her into affordable housing finance. She also shares how a mentor believed in her before she believed in herself, and how she now pays that forward through community outreach with organizations like Breaking Chains in Nampa. Steph shares her own journey reclaiming her Hawaiian middle name, Lokelani, and the family recipes and traditions that keep her culture alive here in Boise. This is a conversation about mentorship, motherhood, cultural pride, and finding your way back to what really matters.   About Celia Espinoza: Celia works in affordable housing finance and development across Idaho, but her story is rooted in much more than her career. A grandmother, a first-generation Mexican American, a lifelong learner, and someone deeply connected to culture, spirituality, and community, she draws from her own experiences navigating hardship and finding her voice. Her journey has shaped a passion for creating opportunity, encouraging others to see themselves in spaces they may have never imagined, and honoring the stories that make us who we are.   Key Takeaways:  - Community and mentorship (like the b|Wise program) can turn strangers into lifelong friends and support systems. - Feeling disconnected from your culture is common when you're raised far from your community, but small rituals can help you reclaim it. - A single trip to your ancestral homeland can be profoundly grounding, even if you can't trace your exact family history. - Sometimes the people who believe in you before you believe in yourself change the entire trajectory of your career. - Giving back looks different for everyone: from mentoring interns to giving at-risk youth a tour of your workplace. - Culture is often kept alive through the smallest things: Saturday morning music, a family recipe, or a name you almost stopped using.   Chapters: 00:00 - Cold open 00:20 - Welcome to The Essence of You 00:36 - How Steph and Celia met through b|Wise 03:38 - Networking without the small talk 07:24 - A healing retreat with an herbalist 11:13 - Feeling disconnected from your culture 15:46 - Capturing grandma's stories before they're gone 18:49 - Discovering Giraffe Laugh 26:18 - Lomi lomi salmon & Hawaiian food traditions 28:10 - Keeping culture alive on Saturday mornings 29:38 - Four names & reclaiming a Hawaiian identity 34:16 - The calling to Standing Rock 42:54 - Homelessness to a full-circle career 46:16 - The mentor who believed in her first 51:35 - Giving back through Breaking Chains 57:29 - Hobbies, flow & making time for creativity 1:00:25 - Who are you at your core?

In this timely conversation,  Steph Lokelani sits down with her dear friend Adrienne Evans, Executive Director of United Vision for Idaho (UVI), for a raw, wide-ranging conversation about political division, authoritarianism, and how everyday people can rebuild community across difference. From growing up in rural Idaho to a life-changing visit to Auschwitz, Adrienne shares hard-won wisdom from 17+ years leading UVI and over 107,000 conversations across 13 states. They talk rural Idaho organizing, the difference between mobilizing and organizing, why nonprofits are under real threat, Adrienne's upcoming memoir, and the new documentary "Democracy in Motion." A heartfelt, honest episode about staying human in a divided world. About Adrienne Evans: Adrienne Evans is the executive director for United Vision for Idaho, the state’s only multi-issue, progressive coalition. She’s a sociologist with a background in multi-issue movement development with an emphasis on the intersections of economic, social, and racial justice. A nationally recognized social justice organizer, strategist, renown public speaker and facilitator, she is an organizer at heart and in practice. Her perspective and work on key state and national campaigns has been a critical voice to move both policy and practice. She cultivates and works with organizations and leaders locally, nationally, and internationally to cultivate a new spirit of collaboration to develop strategies and interventions and to fundamentally address the existential crisis of democracy collectively facing all of us. Strategic, bold and unafraid to tackle our greatest challenges coming from one of the most conservative places in the country and situated in a state that is a target of rising anti-democratic, authoritarian, and militarized with deepening investment, she spearheaded a revolutionary program that has amassed the greatest set of quantitative and qualitative data from those aligned with anti-democratic and authoritarian movements to reorient the progressive movement and lay the foundation for strategic interventions to meet the gravity of a declining democracy. The project, United Vision Project is game changing for our ability to hold and advance a democracy for all of us, hailed by senior research partner, Steven Gardner at Political Research Associates as, “The first time anything like this has ever been attempted, the closest thing might be the work of Theodor Adorno studying the rise of authoritarianism after the Spanish Civil War." Key Takeaways: - Division grows when we stop seeing each other's humanity - curiosity and small acts of "neighboring" can rebuild it - Organizing ≠ mobilizing: real change starts with relationships, not just turnout - Only 6% of philanthropic dollars reach rural communities - nonprofits need grassroots support now more than ever - Democracy is like a garden: it must be tended, or the weeds take over - Adrienne's upcoming memoir and the documentary "Democracy in Motion" both explore what it takes to build a movement beyond party lines - United Vision Project trains people to have real conversations across political extremes — learn more at UnitedVisionProject.org 🔗 Learn More: United Vision for Idaho: https://uvidaho.org/ United Vision Project: https://unitedvisionproject.org/ 🎧 Follow The Essence of You https://irlfilms.com/theessenceofyou Chapters: 00:00 - Cold open, welcome & how Steph and Adrienne met 01:13 - Inside United Vision for Idaho (UVI) 05:24 - Political division hits home 09:17 - Finding common ground with neighbors 13:14 - Randy's story: rural Idaho & changed minds 15:48 - Organizing vs. mobilizing 18:49 - No Kings protests & taking real action 22:16 - Nonprofits under attack 24:18 - Democracy is like a garden 26:15 - Writing a memoir in the middle of it all 30:27 - Inside the documentary "Democracy in Motion" 33:17 - Building the world we want 37:35 - "Neighboring" & leading with curiosity 39:42 - Where our opinions on race really come from 42:55 - Community, belonging & veterans 46:26 - Auschwitz, hobbies & Adrienne's personal story 54:54 - Disillusioned with the two-party system 57:27 - Why politics does you, whether you like it or not 59:52 - Who is Adrienne at her core? 1:02:19 - Announcing Motion Storyworks 1:03:52 - United Vision Project & closing thoughts

Jamie Lange has spent her career sitting in two different rooms - the therapy chair and the yoga mat - and on this episode of The Essence of You, she brings the wisdom from both into one of the most layered, tender, and unexpectedly funny conversations of the series yet. Jamie is a licensed therapist, owner of Front Street Yoga, and founder of the nonprofit Girls on the Mat. She joins Steph for a conversation about the ideas we never chose but carry anyway. They start with the Rumi quote on Jamie's studio wall: "Out beyond ideas of right doing and wrong doing, there is a field. I will meet you there," and use it to unpack why the people we find hardest to love are often just mirrors of ourselves, why family wounds cut deeper than any other kind, and what it costs to be the one everyone assumes "has it together." The second half goes deep about Girls on the Mat: how it grew out of Jamie's own girlhood wounds, why research now shows girls losing their self-esteem as young as nine, and how nervous system literacy - not perfection - is the real work of healing. It closes on a Rumi line that says it best: "The wound is the place where the light enters you." This episode includes candid discussions of divorce, childhood trauma, and family estrangement. About Jamie Lange Jamie Lange, Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor (LCPC), E-RYT 500, M.A., M.Counseling, is a psychotherapist, yoga therapist, educator, and speaker dedicated to helping people heal through the integration of neuroscience, spirituality, psychology, movement, and mindfulness. For the past decade, she has served the Boise community through Humble Warrior Counseling, Consulting & Yoga, where she specializes in trauma and nervous system regulation using yoga therapy, somatic approaches, including EMDR and meditation. Jamie is also the founder and Executive Director of Girls on the Mat, a nonprofit organization that empowers girls through nervous system literacy, breathwork, movement, and community. She is also the owner of Front Street Yoga and Healing, a wellness studio that brings together yoga, mental health, and holistic healing under one roof. Rooted in both yoga and Buddhist philosophy, Jamie believes healing is never a solitary act. It is something we create together. “I create you and you create me.” Every interaction leaves an imprint. We can create from pain, or we can create from love. We get to choose. Through healing ourselves, we become capable of co-creating lives, relationships, and communities rooted in compassion, courage, and love. 🔗 Connect with Jamie Lange Front Street Yoga: https://www.frontstreetyoga.com/ Humble Warrior Counseling: https://www.frontstreetyoga.com/humble-warrior-counseling Girls on the Mat: https://www.girlsonthemat.com/ 🎧 Follow The Essence of You https://irlfilms.com/theessenceofyou 💡 KEY TAKEAWAYS - Most beliefs about who we are were given to us, not chosen, which means we can give them back. - People we find "difficult to love" often reflect something in ourselves we don't want to face. - Family wounds cut deeper because family carries an implicit promise of safety. - A Klesha is an idea we're stuck in. Meeting someone there, instead of reacting, stops the ripple. - Healing isn't about being finished, it's noticing when you're activated and regulating in the moment. - Girls on the Mat was born from Jamie's own girlhood wounds: "When we heal girls, we help women. When we heal women, we save girls." - New research shows girls now lose self-esteem as early as age nine. - "The wound is the place where the light enters you" - our hardest experiences often become our purpose. ⏱️ CHAPTERS 00:00 Cold Open 00:28 Welcome + How Steph Met Jamie 02:11 Yoga for Good: A Decade of Giving 05:43 Meet Jamie Lange 06:42 The Rumi Quote on Jamie's Wall 09:08 Steph: Taught to Be Racist as a Kid 11:37 People "Difficult to Love" 14:00 Steph & Her Sister 16:35 Why Family Wounds Hit Differently 20:00 Divorce, Frodo the dog, and Broken Safety 24:00 Cosmo's Essay: "Luckiest Kid Alive" 27:00 Just Ideas: Body Image & Self-Talk 28:00 Why Steph Started Attending the Women's Group 30:00 The Pool Is Closed 33:00 "Remember Who the F*** You Are" 36:43 Five Years of Facilitating Groups 40:33 Jamie the Human, Not Just the Therapist 46:03 Safety in Yoga Teacher Training 47:35 Choosing a Different Kind of Studio 50:37 Kleshas: Our Stuck Ideas 55:32 Mirrors in Marriage 58:20 The Birth of Girls on the Mat 59:45 "Heal Girls, Help Women" 1:01:42 Real Results in Boise Schools 1:03:33 Trauma, Branding & Mental Health 1:04:51 Facilitators & Studio Partners 1:09:00 Camps + Girl Scout Partnership 1:11:08 Self-Esteem Now Drops at Age 9 1:13:48 Should Facilitators Heal First? 1:16:45 Nervous System Literacy 1:19:00 Nothing to Shed 1:21:00 Breathwork in Real Time 1:23:42 Rumi: Where the Light Enters 1:25:00 Jamie's Wounds, Quiet Violence 1:27:08 Walking Toward the Wound 1:29:13 Who Are You at Your Core? 1:31:36 Sign-Off

In this episode of The Essence of You, host Steph Lokelani sits down with Jen Potcher - an actor, singer, and karaoke host based in Boise - for a wide-ranging conversation about the many lives of a working actor and the power of women supporting women. Jen pulls back the curtain on her work as a "standardized patient" and role player: an actor who steps into realistic scenarios for nursing schools, police academies, the Department of Correction, genetic counseling telehealth sessions, and even fair housing discrimination testing. She talks candidly about the emotional toll of playing victims, perpetrators, and everything in between, the validating moments that remind her why the work matters, and the hustle of piecing together a living as a working actor. The conversation then shifts to Jen's proudest accomplishment: founding Female Film Slayers, a Boise-based community of women in film born out of a need for connection, safety, and support in an industry that can be tough on women both in front of and behind the camera. Jen walks through the group's evolution, from karaoke nights and a living-room makeup class to four award-winning short films: "#Ded," the 13 Stories musical "A Pack of Cigarettes and 11 Cents," the festival-winning "Pinky Promise," and their most ambitious project yet, "Bluebird," a mob-and-trafficking thriller shot at the Egyptian Theater (complete with a real fire alarm scare that may have saved the historic building). Steph and Jen close out with a reflection on identity beneath the titles, and a peek into Jen's life as a karaoke host at the Balcony Club, where - as she puts it - everyone is a rock star. About Jen Potcher: Jen Potcher is a local actress, singer, and filmmaker who has spent more than three decades honing her craft in theater and film. Audiences can catch her solving crimes in The Dinner Detective Interactive Murder Mystery Show or performing the National Anthem at sporting and community events throughout the Treasure Valley. By day, Jen brings realism to nursing and law enforcement training programs through simulation-based acting. Her proudest accomplishment, however, is founding The Female Film Slayers of Idaho. What began as a social and support group for women in film has evolved into an award-winning team of fierce female filmmakers dedicated to creating original stories and uplifting one another's voices. Their latest film, Blue Bird, was recognized with multiple awards at the Idaho Film Family Festival, where the team earned honors for directing, cinematography, and acting, including Best Actress, and Best Supporting Actress for Jen. Bluebird is currently on the festival circuit.  A passionate advocate for the arts and a proud ally, Jen can also be found hosting karaoke every Sunday night at The Balcony Club, Idaho's premier LGBTQ+ nightclub. Key Takeaways: "Standardized patient" and role-player acting work is a legitimate, ongoing career path. Jen acts in realistic training scenarios for nursing schools, multiple police academies, the Department of Correction, genetic counseling telehealth sessions, and fair housing discrimination testing. This kind of acting carries real emotional weight. Running the same intense scenario dozens of times in a day - crying, screaming, playing victims or perpetrators - is exhausting in a way people outside the industry rarely recognize. Validating moments (a former police trainee crediting a scenario for a life lesson learned, or being asked to demo a technique no one had seen a role player do before) help combat the imposter syndrome that even experienced actors constantly feel. Acting careers are built through relationships and persistence, not a single break. Jen's path started with a friend's tip about River City Entertainment in 2018, then snowballed through referrals into Boise State, Grand Canyon University, multiple police academies, and beyond. Female Film Slayers was born from a real, felt need: women in the local film industry needed a safe space to support each other, share information, and combat the isolation of working with the same talented women without ever really getting to know them. Big creative projects don't require expertise up front, they require a willingness to learn together. Female Film Slayers' four films show a clear and rapid growth curve in production quality, built one project at a time. Inclusion was a deliberate choice. On "Bluebird," every single person who auditioned was offered a role, with the team finding creative ways to weave in extras, fight performers, and first-time crew members. Community accountability matters. Female Film Slayers exists in part to give women a place to bring concerns about harassment on set and figure out, together, how to respond and support one another. Karaoke hosting, much like Jen's other work, is about giving people their moment. Her hosting philosophy: "everyone at my show is a rock star," regardless of skill level. Chapters: 00:00 – Cold open: dollar movie nights and the joy of going solo 00:52 – Welcome to The Essence of You & meeting Jen Potcher 01:00 – How Steph and Jen met, and the staged reading "Being Jane Eyre" 06:57 – You don't have to go to Hollywood: becoming a "standardized patient" 09:15 – Police academies, the Department of Correction & telehealth genetic counseling 12:58 – Scripts vs. improv in training scenarios 17:08 – Getting into role-player work, quitting her day job, and her first paid gig 20:25 – Fair housing testing and hosting The Dinner Detective murder mystery show 24:21 – The hidden exhaustion of playing different people all day 26:19 – The craziest characters she's been asked to play 28:58 – Why Jen started Female Film Slayers 32:49 – First gatherings: karaoke nights and a community makeup class 34:30 – Future class ideas: gun safety, horses, and harassment protocols 36:27 – How the group got its name 37:08 – First film, "#Ded," and the 13 Stories musical 44:03 – Second film, "Pinky Promise," and its festival wins 50:50 – Fourth film "Bluebird": inspired by The Godfather and Commando 56:02 – Behind the scenes: 31 cast members, fight choreography & cinematographer April Frame 1:01:50 – Why the film is called "Bluebird" 1:02:08 – The Female Film Slayers screening night and the Egyptian Theater fire scare 1:09:44 – Reflecting on the group and what's next 1:12:01 – Closing question: Who are you at your core? 1:13:42 – Life as a karaoke host: "everyone's a rock star" 1:16:52 – Closing thanks and an invitation to join Female Film Slayers

In this heartfelt episode, host Steph Lokelani sits down with her close friend, elementary school computer teacher, and yoga teacher trainee Mallory Wirz for a conversation that is equal parts raw, funny, and deeply moving. Steph and Mallory met through a two-year women's healing retreat. Their shared story of growing up as the oldest siblings, navigating trauma, and choosing the hard work of healing forms the backbone of this episode. From breaking generational cycles and raising emotionally empowered kids, to standing up to bullying, teaching compassion in the classroom, and finding meditative peace underwater, Mallory's journey is one of quiet, powerful transformation. Whether you are in the thick of your healing journey, wondering if it is worth it, or looking for proof that you can come out stronger on the other side, this episode is for you. About Mallory Wirz: I am Mallory Wirz. I am a wife, mother of 3 wonderful kids, a computer teacher and learning how to become a yoga teacher. I have lived such a roller coaster of a life. A sprinkle of just about everything from, beautiful, really hard, sometimes scary, and things most should never need to go through. I strive to take what was put in front of me and learn what not to do and what to use as a lesson to make the world a better place for others that come after me. I live my life with love as the foundation to everything I do. I give love without any expectation and hope that it helps fill what is missing in others. I love to scuba dive, love learning how to navigate emotions and how it applies to yoga philosophy and I love spending time with family and friends.  Key Takeaways: 1. Healing is a choice - and a courageous one. Mallory reflects on how she could have gone a very different direction given what she experienced growing up, and credits her commitment to healing with shaping the person, parent, and teacher she is today. 2. Breaking generational cycles is one of the greatest gifts you can give your children. Mallory shares how intentionally parenting differently - giving her kids a voice, space to be heard, and freedom to express big emotions - is something she considers her greatest success. 3. You are not responsible for the pain that other people project on you. One of the most powerful yogic principles Mallory has been applying in her own life: recognizing misperception, and understanding that when someone hurts you, it is often about what they are carrying, not about you. 4. Showing up for others starts with knowing what it felt like not to be shown up for. Mallory's motivation to always be in someone's corner comes directly from her own experience of feeling unsupported and turning pain into empathy. 5. Teaching kids about cyberbullying and compassion early can change everything. Mallory uses a simple, powerful teaching tool in her classroom: if you would not say it to someone's face on the playground, do not type it. She has witnessed this teaching lead to real change. 6. Finding your meditative state can look different for everyone. For Mallory, it is underwater: diving in the rain off the coast of Cozumel, watching rain hit the ocean surface from below, and being completely still. 7. Your core self may still be in discovery, and that is okay. When asked who she is at her core, Mallory's answer is honest: a loving, caring person who leads with love and compassion, and continuing to become more fully herself. If you or someone you know is having a difficult time, free support is available: Call or text 988 to reach the Idaho Crisis and Suicide Hotline. Support is available 24/7, and you can also use their 988 Lifeline Chat for online support. Chapters: 00:00 — Cold Open: Animals, Dogs & Setting the Scene 00:31 — Welcome & Introducing Mallory Wirz 01:55 — How Steph and Mallory Met: The Women's Healing Retreat 04:45 — What Drew Mallory to the Retreat and What She Found There 07:10 — Mirrors of Each Other: Shared Trauma and Shared Healing 09:35 — Why Mallory Joined Yoga Teacher Training 13:30 — Girls on the Mat: Yoga, Young Girls, and Purpose 17:00 — Breaking Chains: Raising Kids Differently 21:00 — Mallory's Daughter Stands Up to Bullying 24:00 — Shared Bullying Stories from Childhood 28:00 — Adult Bullies and the Unhealed Wounds Behind Them 30:10 — The Healing Journey Is Not Like It Looks on TV 33:00 — Yoga Philosophy: Misperception and Shifting the Narrative 38:30 — How Mallory Handles Bullying as a Teacher 43:00 — Cyberbullying Lessons in the Classroom 47:00 — Youth Mental Health and Rising Suicide Rates in the Treasure Valley 54:00 — What Shaped the Person Mallory Is Today 58:00 — Showing Up for Others Because No One Showed Up for You 01:02:00 — Backpacks, New Shoes & Breaking the Cycle of Shame 01:06:00 — How Mallory Became a Computer Teacher 01:09:00 — Scuba Diving, Cozumel, and Finding Peace Underwater 01:19:00 — The Final Question: Who Are You at Your Core? 01:23:00 — Closing, Future Plans & Signing Off

What if the behaviors holding you back aren't flaws to fix, but patterns to understand? In this episode of The Essence of You Podcast, host Steph Lokelani sits down with Karolee Lovan, behavior life coach and behavioral interventionist, and founder of Social Graces. Karolee brings a rare blend of behavioral psychology, real-world intervention experience, and deeply personal transformation to a conversation that will make you rethink everything you thought you knew about habits, change, and who you are at your core. Karolee shares her winding path from working with special education students to stepping into the classroom, walking away from a broken system, navigating the corporate world, and ultimately relaunching Social Graces with a crystal-clear mission: help people stop running on autopilot and start living from the driver's seat. About Karolee Lovan:  Most professional coaching focuses on surface-level symptoms: "Work harder," "Wake up earlier," "Stay disciplined." But if you are running on outdated patterns, you are simply accelerating in the wrong direction. Karolee Lovan works at the intersection of behavioral psychology and practical coaching. She doesn't lecture; she listens until her clients truly hear themselves. The Problem: The Invisible Loop Throughout her career, Karolee spent years watching individuals work incredibly hard without moving forward. It wasn't a lack of motivation, a talent deficit, or a lack of discipline. They were simply stuck inside behavioral loops they had never been taught to see—running on default settings that had quietly stopped serving their current goals. The Approach: The Pivot Point Method As a Behavior Life Coach with a specialized background in intervention, Karolee moves past the traditional "noise" of self-help to focus entirely on the mechanics of human behavior. Using her proprietary Pivot Point Method, she helps clients move through the why and then into the how of sustainable change: Locate the Pivot Point: Pinpointing the exact moment a behavioral loop triggers, exposing the hidden patterns causing plateaus. Execute the Interruption: Applying targeted interventions at that exact pivot point to break the exhausting cycle of working hard just to stay in place. Sustain the Shift: Grounding new behaviors in daily workflow using behavioral science, ensuring the new path becomes the permanent default. The Result: Movement with Clarity Karolee’s work isn't about adding more to a client's plate or demanding exhausting amounts of willpower. It is about removing the friction of the patterns that no longer serve who they are becoming. She doesn't offer generic advice; she offers a mirror and a toolkit. "I don't lecture. I listen until you hear yourself." 🎁 Mention that you heard Karolee on The Essence of You and receive 50% off her services at Social Graces — offer valid ONLY through June 2026. Visit: https://socialgracesbc.com/ Whether you're stuck in an old thought loop, struggling to change a habit, or simply trying to show up better for the people you love, this episode is for you. Key Takeaways: - Behavior is not good or bad - it's an action. We assign meaning to our behaviors based on upbringing, culture, and experience. Recognizing this frees you to rewrite the story. - Coming off autopilot is the first step. If you don't examine what you're doing day in and day out, you'll stay stuck in patterns that no longer serve you. - Start smaller than you think. Real, lasting change happens through micro-steps. Karolee's example: don't join a gym yet, just put your workout shoes by the door. - Gratitude can rewire your brain. After two years of deep inner work, Karolee discovered that daily gratitude practice was her personal "linchpin" - the behavior that unlocked everything else. - Coaching vs. therapy: know the difference. A coach is an accountability partner focused on moving forward. A therapist helps heal the past. Both have a place and Karolee knows exactly where her scope begins and ends. Chapters: 00:00 - Cold Open: McLovin Ice Breaker 00:38 - Introducing Karolee Lovan 01:53 - What Drew Karolee to Behavior Work 03:22 - From Paraprofessional to Special Ed Teacher 04:07 - Why She Left the Classroom 05:00 - Behavior Kept Calling Her Back 05:58 - Launching Social Graces the First Time 06:57 - Defining Behavior: What It Actually Is 07:57 - Coming Off Autopilot 09:41 - Balancing Behavioral Expertise at Home 11:14  -Being Your Own Client 12:06  -Two Years of Deep Inner Work 13:03  -Gratitude as the Linchpin 14:13 - Rewiring Through Small Wins 15:56 - What Is Social Graces? 18:42 - Six Weeks, One Behavior 19:39 - What Clients Most Want to Change 21:32 - Comfortable Being Uncomfortable 22:09 - Coach vs. Therapist: The Key Difference 24:04 - How Launching Changed Karolee's Life 25:02 - Corporate Communication Breakdowns 26:45 - What's in It for Me? The Simon Sinek Thread 28:13  -When People Check Out (The HP Example) 29:08 - Steph's Scarcity Mindset — Live Unpack 31:25 - The "Unpacking" Framework 33:00 - The GPS Analogy: Rerouting to Your Destination 35:47 - Building the Action Plan with Your Client 37:05 - The Workout Shoes Method 39:05 - Identity Shapes Behavior 40:29 - The Fire Extinguisher Story 42:03 - Special Offer for Essence of You Listeners 43:18 - Passion, Royalty & the Color Purple 45:46 - What Would Your Brother Say? 47:42 - Analyzing Poetry at 11 PM 50:10 - Behaviors Are Neither Good Nor Bad 52:43 - The Experience That Shaped Her Most 54:30 - Marriage as a Practice 57:10 - Where Personal Story Meets Purpose 59:57 - Getting Volunteered Into Corporate 01:01:38 - Gratitude for the Ugly Chapters 01:03:38 - Essence of You — What Does It Mean? 01:05:23 - Why Steph Started the Podcast 01:07:57 - How Many True Friends Do You Have? 01:09:47 - Final Question: Who Are You at Your Core? 01:10:56 -Closing, Discount Reminder & Farewell

What does it mean to truly see someone? In this episode of The Essence of You, host Steph Lokelani sits down with Shannon White-Deane, a Certified Gallup Strengths Coach, leadership and disability consultant, and "certified single mom" based in Boise, Idaho. Shannon brings warmth, honesty, and hard-won wisdom to a wide-ranging conversation that touches on identity, community, change, and what it really means to lead from your strengths. Shannon shares the story behind her crutches and the quiet but powerful decision to embrace them. That shift became a metaphor for the way she lives and leads: stop hiding the parts of yourself that make you who you are, because those differences aren't liabilities, they're advantages. She talks about her national Paul Gleason Award for Innovation and Initiative in wildland fire leadership, her journey to becoming a Gallup Strengths Coach, and the single moment with a former boss that confirmed she had found her calling. She speaks candidly about navigating change and why she believes being curious rather than judgmental can transform how we relate to one another. Whether you're exploring your own strengths, learning to lead more inclusively, or simply trying to make room for the people around you, this episode is full of moments that will stay with you. About Shannon: Shannon believes the little things in life aren’t little at all - they’re the moments that spark transformation. As a Gallup-Certified CliftonStrengths consultant, coach, and facilitator, she helps individuals and teams discover and use their unique talents to thrive. For Shannon, having a coach is like having a trainer, because accountability matters. She encourages clients to leverage their talent on and off the field, and reminds them that taking care of yourself is the foundation for doing anything for others. Drawing on her experience as a professional, a mom, and a coach, Shannon creates space for meaningful conversations that highlight what’s working—not just what isn’t. She brings empathy, insight, and clarity to every interaction, helping people see themselves differently and move forward with purpose. Whether working with executives, managers, or individuals, Shannon is known for turning everyday conversations into breakthroughs. Her strengths-based approach builds resilience, fosters collaboration, and unlocks the best in people - both at work and in life. Key Takeaways: 1. Your differences are your advantages. - Shannon's core belief, shaped by a lifetime of navigating the world with cerebral palsy, is that the things that make you different from everyone else are not weaknesses to manage around. They are strengths to lean into. She learned to stop hiding her crutches in photos and started seeing them as part of who she is. 2. Your strengths give you energy; your weaknesses drain it. - One of the most practical insights in this episode: when you operate from your top Gallup Strengths, you feel energized. When you operate from your lower ones, you feel depleted. This reframe changes how you think about self-improvement - stop trying to get better at what exhausts you, and double down on what fuels you. 3. You don't have to be the manager to lead. - Shannon brought Clifton Strengths to her entire BLM district. Not because she was in charge, but because she believed in it, asked, and led up. Her lesson: the answer to "can I do this?" is almost always just "ask." All they can say is no. 4. Little things are the big things. - From holding a door for someone on crutches to a mom on the greenbelt telling her young son "that is a strong woman," Shannon notices the moments most people miss. Her work as a disability consultant is built on this: help people see what they take for granted, so they can serve everyone better. 5. Change is a constant. - Shannon prepares to launch her oldest son into the Air Force, her deep understanding of how to work with change, helps prepare her for this major family milestone. 6. Be curious, not judgmental. - Shannon's closing philosophy: before you assume you understand why someone is doing something, get curious. The colleague who kept derailing meetings wasn't being difficult, he had "Command" as his #3 strength, and once Shannon named it, everything shifted. Understanding changes everything. Chapters: 00:00 — Welcome & Introduction 01:45 — How Steph and Shannon Met 02:30 — Shannon's New Year Goal: Making Real Time for Friends 03:55 — The Spud Run & Racing with a Disability 08:05 — The Paul Gleason Award: Bringing Strengths to Wildland Fire 09:35 — What Got Shannon Into Gallup Strengths Coaching 11:20 — Steph and Shannon Compare Their Top 5 Strengths 14:45 — The Shadow Side of Strengths (and Why Harmony Is Steph's #34) 16:15 — Clifton Strengths vs. DISC: How They're Different 18:30 — Shannon's Son Is Joining the Air Force: Being a Bird Launcher 20:05 — The Crutches Story: Hiding, Then Choosing to Be Seen 23:55 — What "The Little Things Are the Big Things" Really Means 25:10 — The Door Story: What Disability Consulting Actually Looks Like 28:55 — Back to the Race: Doing It Your Own Way 32:10 — The Power of Community and Why It Makes You Live Longer 35:50 — Starting a Business Solo & Finding Treasure Valley Givers 38:50 — The Leadership Moment That Changed Everything (Shannon's Boss Story) 44:00 — Horseback Riding in Minnesota: The Joy That Shaped Her 46:20 — How Shannon Navigates Change 48:40 — What Brought Shannon to This Moment 54:00 — How to Convince Someone to Take the Strengths Assessment 57:10 — The Team Meeting Story: Command Strength & the Colleague Who Clicked 01:01:40 — You Don't Have to Be the Manager to Lead 01:03:30 — What Experience Most Shaped Shannon 01:06:30 — Shannon's Next Goal: Walter's Wiggles at Zion National Park 01:09:45 — What Shannon Wants the World to Know About People with Disabilities 01:11:10 — The Essence of You: Who Is Shannon at Her Core? 01:14:00 — Steph Answers Shannon's Question: Building Her Business Solo 01:18:30 — Closing & Next Steps

In this special live episode of The Essence of You, host Steph Lokelani hands the mic to executive coach and mental performance strategist Mike Krause for a full podcast takeover recorded in front of over 50 leaders at the Hemingway Building on Boise State University campus as part of the Leadership Boise program through the Boise Metro Chamber. Mike leads a rich, wide-ranging conversation on leadership, legacy, and succession with three guests who have each led organizations through growth, change, and transition: Kevin Bailey of the Idaho Community Foundation, Angela Taylor of the Taylor LEAD Foundation and former President and General Manager of the Atlanta Dream WNBA team, and host Steph Lokelani of In Real Life Films and #OMGFemaleFilmmakers. Together they explore what it means to lead authentically and what gets in the way. From Angela's experience watching sports coaches lose themselves trying to replicate a predecessor, to Kevin's practice of writing his values on his bathroom mirror each morning, to Steph leaving a corporate career at HP to build IRL Films on her own terms, the conversation is candid, grounded, and full of hard-won wisdom. They dig into how to build championship cultures (and what the San Antonio Spurs can teach your nonprofit), why having team members with different values makes you stronger, when to trust your gut even if it means being wrong, and what it truly takes to delegate when you're a founder who's done everything yourself. Angela shares the story of the Taylor LEAD Foundation, a family-founded 501(c)3 focused on getting Idaho girls into sports and scholar athletes into college, including this: 94% of C-suite female leaders in Fortune 500 companies played sports. Kevin pulls back the curtain on how the Idaho Community Foundation manages over $300 million in charitable assets, and what the real funding gap looks like for nonprofits in Idaho. And Steph's closing answer to Mike's final question about what she hopes the people she's filmed, mentored, and worked with will carry forward in ten years lands exactly where this podcast was always headed. About the Guests: Mike Krause is an executive coach and mental performance strategist with Global Bound, LLC, where he partners with executives and emerging leaders to enhance performance, support sustainable growth, and strengthen holistic wellbeing both inside and outside the workplace. He brings over 25 years of executive leadership experience in the nonprofit sector, including 4½ years with the United States Department of State in Southern and Central Africa, where his work focused on public health initiatives and cross-cultural leadership. Mike serves as an executive coach for the Idaho Leads program and is the developer and lead facilitator of the Ascending Leaders initiative through the Idaho Community Foundation. He is currently pursuing a master’s degree in Sport and Performance Psychology, while co-hosting a weekly podcast and traveling throughout the country speaking on leadership, workplace culture, and mental fitness practices. Kevin Bailey is the Vice President of Community Impact at the Idaho Community Foundation. He oversees the Idaho Nonprofit Center nonprofit support programming as well as ICF’s grantmaking functions. Kevin was previously the CEO of the Idaho Nonprofit Center and was part of merging the Idaho Nonprofit Center into ICF in late 2024. Kevin and his wife, Becca, have 3 young boys, ages 10, 8, and 5. In his spare time he loves to hike, bike, and ski in Idaho’s beautiful mountain areas. Angela Taylor is a trailblazing sports executive, entrepreneur, and leadership strategist committed to helping people and organizations reach their full potential. A former Stanford women’s basketball player and two-time NCAA National Champion, Angela went on to hold leadership roles across the WNBA, including positions with the league office, Washington Mystics, Atlanta Dream, and Minnesota Lynx. Today, she brings that same championship mindset to her work as Co-Founder and Partner of The Dignitas Agency, where she advises clients on leadership development, organizational culture, inclusion, and sustainable change. Through The Taylor LEAD Foundation, Angela continues to invest in the next generation by creating pathways for young people, women, and underserved communities to thrive. Steph Lokelani is a proud graduate of the 2023 LB cohort and has called Boise home for over 21 years. She founded #OMGFemaleFilmmakers 8 years ago and In Real Life Films in 2025 with a clear mission: to serve Idaho nonprofits and local businesses, such as HP and Boise Cascade, through purposeful video storytelling. What started as a local vision has grown into a recognized production company serving 25+ Treasure Valley nonprofits, attracting national partners, and creating local jobs. Steph leads with heart, annually offering pro bono video and podcast production and currently serves as board president of Treasure Valley Children's Theater. When she's not behind the camera, she's strength training, running half marathons for fun, and giving her dog and cats a safe and happy place to live. Key Takeaways: 1. Authenticity is alignment, not a personality type. Being authentic as a leader isn't about having a certain style, it's about knowing your values, living them out, and showing up consistently enough that your team knows what to expect. When leaders try to replicate someone else, they erode trust without even knowing it. 2. Values are a toolkit, not a fixed list. Kevin keeps his core values written on his bathroom mirror and chooses one to lead with each day. As life changes, values shift. The goal isn't one immovable set it's knowing your values well enough to amplify the right ones in the right situations. 3. Difference is a feature, not a bug. Whether on a film set, a WNBA team, or a nonprofit, you don't want everyone to think like you. Different values, creative instincts, and strengths are where innovation lives. The key is alignment around organizational mission, not personal match. 4. The role of opposites in succession. Angela observed that when replacing an unsuccessful leader, organizations naturally look for someone different, but when replacing a successful one, they often clone, leaving no room for new vision. Real succession planning makes space for different leadership to carry the mission forward in new ways. 5. Leadership is stewardship, not ownership. All three guests circled back here: the role of a leader is to be a caretaker for the mission, the culture, and the people, not to make it about themselves. That humility is the foundation of lasting legacy. 6. You cannot grow your business if you're doing all the work inside it. Steph is living this right now - delegating for the first time, hiring an editor, sending her team to cover events while she focuses on business development. Angela and Kevin both name the discomfort: when you're a natural doer, stepping back feels like not doing enough. But leadership requires a different kind of output. 7. Trust your intuition and act on it sooner. Angela learned this the hard way: she knew within weeks which team members weren't right for her organization but waited a year to act. The delay cost the culture. Leaders who pause too long on people decisions often pay for it with everyone else's morale. 8. Communicating the why is not optional. Vision only moves teams when it's shared. If people don't understand the North Star, they fill the gap with resistance. And leading from a vision - not just a plan - is what allows you to navigate when the plan breaks down. The power outage the night before this recording was a live test of exactly that. 9. 94% of C-suite women in Fortune 500 companies played sports. Angela built the Taylor LEAD Foundation on this data. A 39-point gap separates girls below the poverty line from those with access to sports. Getting girls in the game isn't just an equity issue, it's a leadership pipeline issue. 10. Standing up for yourself is a leadership skill. Steph admits it comes naturally to stand up for her team - oldest of four kids, lifelong big sister energy - but advocating for herself as a business owner has been the hardest thing. Learning to speak up for her own needs and boundaries has been its own kind of growth. Chapters: 00:00 — Welcome and Episode Intro 00:45 — Mike Introduces the Guests and Setting 03:27 — Kicking Off: How Do You Frame Leadership? 04:22 — Kevin: Lead From Who You Are, Not Who You Admire 05:57 — Angela: Everyone Can Be a Leader — Find Your Own Voice 08:10 — Steph: Authenticity Means Giving Your Team Room to Lead 09:02 — Mike Opens the Floor: What Is Authenticity, Really? 10:28 — Angela: When Leaders Lose Themselves (The Sports Coaching Analogy) 13:03 — Kevin: Writing His Values on His Bathroom Mirror 15:10 — Mike: Values Under Pressure, Trust, and Emotional Contagion 17:20 — Mike Asks Steph: What Made You Go Out on Your Own? 17:51 — Steph: Leaving HP and Choosing Alignment Over Stability 19:27 — From OMG Female Filmmakers to IRL Films: A Rebrand with Purpose 20:43 — Angela: Building Championship Culture — The Spurs Model 24:57 — Kevin: The CAR Model — Competency, Autonomy, and Relatedness in Hiring 27:07 — Legacy: What Are You Hoping to Leave Behind? 27:38 — Kevin: The Coaching Tree — Joy in Watching Others Find Their Footing 28:44 — Angela: From Achievement to Impact — The Moment She Found Her Why 30:42 — Steph: Leaving a Piece of Yourself in Every Story You Tell 31:42 — Mike: Leadership Is Stewardship 32:00 — Idaho Community Foundation: What They Do and How It Works 38:00 — Taylor Lead Foundation: Scholar Athletes, Girls in Sports & the 94% Stat 44:42 — Audience Q: Are Different Values on Your Team Good or Bad? 47:33 — Angela: The Role of Opposites in Succession Planning 52:35 — Steph: I Don't Want My Team to Have the Same Values as Me 53:25 — Working Across Differences: Steph's Political Client Story 54:00 — Angela: Values as a Funnel — Stop Drilling Down Into Division 57:01 — Mike and Kevin: Curiosity as a Leadership Superpower 59:14 — Audience Q: How Do You Step Back and Learn to Delegate? 59:55 — Kevin: The 80/20 Rule — On the Business vs. In the Business 1:01:07 — Angela: Six Types of Working Geniuses and Finding Your Role 1:06:50 — Steph: Delegating in Real Time — and Running a Half Marathon 1:08:45 — Audience Q: Women in Male-Dominated Leadership Spaces 1:09:12 — Steph: Approach Everyone as Equals and Be Direct 1:10:09 — Angela: Intention vs. Impact — Developing Your Leadership Range 1:11:14 — Audience Q: What Did You Have to Learn the Hard Way? 1:11:17 — Steph: Not Everybody Is Going to Like You 1:11:22 — Kevin: Keep Showing Up — How He Became a Leader 1:13:24 — Angela: Trust Your Intuition — Don't Wait a Year to Act 1:16:41 — Steph: Balancing Your Vision with Your Team's Input On Set 1:18:30 — Mike: Communicating the Vision from the Start 1:19:20 — Vision vs. Plan: What Happens When Things Fall Apart 1:21:35 — Angela: Leading from a North Star, Not a Blueprint 1:23:31 — Kevin: The Nonprofit Funding Crisis in Idaho 1:27:03 — Audience Q: What Was the Hardest Leadership Decision You've Made? 1:28:52 — Steph: The Hardest Thing Has Been Standing Up for Myself 1:29:44 — Closing: What Do You Hope Your Legacy Carries Forward? 1:30:04 — Kevin: I Hope They Authentically Be Themselves 1:31:00 — Angela: Mindset First — Lean Into Your Authentic Self Sooner 1:32:13 — Steph: Everyone Has a Story to Tell and Everyone Brings Value 1:32:48 — The Essence of You: Finding Who You Are Beyond Your Labels

Steph Lokelani sits down with her friend and self-described "creative human," Tiffany Eller, for a warm, wide-ranging, and deep conversation that covers theater debuts, dream interpretation, personal mission statements, soul contracts, and a compelling theory about AI-generated misinformation that is quietly dividing Americans on Facebook. Together, Steph and Tiffany talk about what it means to follow your inspiration, how the body tells you when you're in or out of alignment, and why creating safe spaces for people to express themselves might be the most meaningful work any of us will ever do. About Tiffany Eller:  Tiffany Eller is a multi-disciplinary artist and ADHD-riddled creator dabbling in everything life has to offer. From making silly reels for local businesses to taking on her first-time acting gig, she’s determined to express herself in as many ways as possible. Her mission is to create safe spaces for others to express themselves just as fully. Tiffany is a Boise native and mother to a daughter that matches her in her silliness and often outwits her humor.  In this episode, we chat about:  🎭 Tiffany's First Acting Role Tiffany is making her stage debut in Funnie: The Most Lamentable Comedie of Jane the Foole, a play by The Luminary Theater Co. set in King Henry VIII's court. It starts as a comedy and becomes a powerful commentary on sexual assault and the silencing of women. Think the MeToo movement, but in the 1500s. Tiffany plays Bessie, a Cockney handmaiden with a brand-new accent she's never attempted before. Steph's advice? Nerves mean you're going to be incredible. 🎭 Boise Bard Players Tiffany shares about her role as managing director and the company's mission to make Shakespeare and classical theater affordable and accessible to the Treasure Valley, including their current truncated, one-hour production of Much Ado About Nothing with a 9pm "spicy adult night" that plays up all the Shakespeare sex jokes that went over your head in high school. ✏️ Being a Creative Human From window murals and crocheting to video editing and co-writing a full-length play with her partner Dakota Brown, Tiffany talks about how her creativity spills into every medium. The untitled play is set on the night of Orson Welles' War of the Worlds broadcast in 1938, exploring media hysteria, political fear, and the family fractures that happen when ideology gets louder than love. Tiffany and Dakota need a title for this play! Drop your idea in the comments. 🧭 Body Alignment as a Compass Tiffany has learned to read her body like a compass. When she's in alignment: energized, low pain, at ease. When she's not: tight chest, back pain, recurring ailments that disappear the moment she changes a circumstance. This conversation is a great reminder to pay attention to what your body is quietly telling you. 💭 Dream Interpretation One of the most magical parts of the episode where Tiffany and Steph interpret their dreams for each other. Who knew they both used to do dream interpretation!? The two also get into dream journaling, lucid dreaming, and astral projection. ✨ "I Am a Soul Healer" Years ago, Tiffany worked with a criminal profiler-turned-consultant who helped her uncover her personal mission statement: I am a soul healer who creates safe spaces for people to express themselves. Tiffany traces this thread through everything she's ever done, from being a college RA to running the Idaho Pun Slam to the way strangers regularly tell her things they've never told anyone. The insight: a mission statement isn't what you do. It's how you be. 🔗 Soul Contracts & Energy Vampires Do you believe some people come into your life because you made an agreement with them before you were even born? Steph and Tiffany explore the idea of soul contracts, the lesson-shaped people who keep showing up in different forms, and what it means when someone repeatedly takes more energy than they give. 🚪 Learning Not to Fear People Tiffany opens up about a lifelong social anxiety - specifically, her old inability to make eye contact. She realized it was never fear of other people. It was fear of herself. She didn't trust that she could hold a boundary if someone misread her warmth as an invitation. That shift in understanding changed everything. 💛 Holding Space vs. Trying to Fix One of the hardest things to learn in any close relationship: letting someone be upset without immediately jumping in to solve it. Tiffany shares how this lesson keeps coming up in her relationships and how she's slowly learning that peace comes from letting people feel what they need to feel, not from handing them a solution. 🤖 AI Misinformation & Fake Facebook Groups Tiffany puts on her tinfoil hat and makes a genuinely eye-opening case: large Facebook groups with Idaho-centric identities appear to be run entirely by fake AI-generated profiles and may be coordinated by foreign agents designed to sow political division. She breaks down how the groups build trust with harmless or funny content, then sneak in divisive political posts to spark arguments in the comment sections. She's spotted the same pattern in states across the country and she has a practical call to action in response to these groups. 🌟 Closing Question: Who Are You at Your Core? Their answers may or may not surprise you. Chapters: 0:00 – Cold Open: Welcome & Cat Chaos (with Osiris the Cat) 0:35 – Introducing Tiffany Eller: The Creative Human 1:48 – How Steph & Tiffany Met 2:43 – Tiffany's Theater Debut: Funnie, The Most Lamentable Comedie of Jane the Foole 6:11 – What Made You Audition for the First Time? 8:25 – Boise Bard Players & Accessible Shakespeare 10:00 – The Many Forms of Tiffany's Creativity (ADHD & Art) 10:41 – Writing a New Play: War of the Worlds, 1938 & Political Division 17:18 – What Brought You to This Moment in Your Life? 19:38 – Reading Your Body: Physical Signs of Alignment vs. Misalignment 22:53 – Dream Interpretation: How to Start Decoding Your Dreams 24:10 – Steph's Dream: Frodo, the Raft & the River Styx 29:59 – Tiffany's Dream: Directing A Cappella & Trusting Your Gut 31:17 – What Three Groups in a Dream Could Mean 34:51 – Lucid Dreaming, Astral Projection & Dream Journaling 38:15 – Where Your Personal Story Meets Your Work in the World 39:57 – "I Am a Soul Healer": Tiffany's Personal Mission Statement 44:00 – Do You Believe in Soul Contracts? 47:07 – Energy Vampires, Cookie-Cutter People & Learning Relationship Lessons 51:00 – A Stranger at the Door: We're All in This Together 53:29 – Overcoming Fear of People Through Boundary Work 55:57 – Holding Space vs. Jumping to Solutions 1:00:59 – The Experience That Changed How Tiffany Shows Up for Others 1:03:59 – Tiffany's Tinfoil Hat Theory: AI Bots, Fake Facebook Groups & Political Manipulation 1:14:00 – Closing Question: Who Are You at Your Core? 1:19:00 – Outro & Guest Invitation

In this episode of The Essence of You, host Steph Lokelani sits down with her friend Adrienne Esposito, Vice President and Branch Manager at WaFd Bank, 2025 Boise Chamber Connector of the Year, and one of the Treasure Valley's most passionate community advocates. What starts as a warm conversation about shared history quickly becomes a deeply personal exploration of purpose, dignity, faith, and what it truly means to serve your community from the inside out. Adrienne opens up about her journey from the restaurant industry to banking, her decade-long commitment to Idaho's ALICE population (Asset Limited, Income Constrained, Employed), and why she believes local businesses hold the real key to lifting their communities. She shares a story most people don't know - that she was married at 16 and had four children by the age of 21 - and how living through welfare offices, food insecurity, and the quiet degradation of poverty became the fuel behind her tireless advocacy. Her message isn't about handouts. It's about giving people back their dignity. Steph brings her own vulnerability too, sharing what it was like growing up in Hawai'i with a family that was turned away from food stamps despite being stretched thin and the extraordinary discovery that she is a direct descendant of King Kamehameha, only to watch her cousins be priced off the very islands her family has called home for generations. Together, they tackle some of today's most pressing conversations: the Idaho housing and wage crisis, the impact of social media on youth identity and mental health, the power of asking "why" without judgment, what it means to ride the fence in a politically divided world, and how faith can be the most grounding force in a noisy life. This episode is warm, honest, and full of the kind of insight that only comes from people who have lived what they preach. In this episode: - How Adrienne went from waitressing to VP of a community bank - What the ALICE population is and why it likely affects someone you know - Adrienne's personal story of living on public assistance as a young mother - Steph's Hawai'i roots and the real cost of tourism on locals - A royal connection: Steph's direct lineage to King Kamehameha - Idaho's housing and minimum wage crisis in 2026 - Social media, body image, and what we owe the next generation - Why asking "why" is one of the most generous things you can do - What it means to be a "fence rider" in today's political climate - Adrienne's faith-grounded answer to: Who are you at your core? - What gets Steph out of bed every morning (hint: it's adventure) - What gets Adrienne out of bed every morning (hint: JC) About Adrienne:  WaFd Bank Vice President and Branch Manager Adrienne Esposito is a respected Idaho business leader with more than 30 years of executive leadership experience and a strong reputation for relationship-driven banking, community impact, and leadership development. She is known for helping businesses grow while creating meaningful connections throughout Idaho’s Treasure Valley through mentorship, financial education, and strategic community partnerships. Adrienne actively serves and supports organizations including the United Way of Treasure Valley, Habitat for Humanity, and Girl Scouts of Silver Sage. She is a recipient of the 2023 TWIN Award, the 2025 Boise Metro Chamber Connector of the Year award, and a two-time nominee/finalist for the Idaho Business Review Women of the Year recognition. If this episode resonated with you, please like, subscribe, and share it with someone who needs to hear it. Chapters: 00:00 - Cold Open: Ducks, Outdoor Cats & Farm Life 00:54 - Welcome & Introductions 02:43 - Meet Adrienne: VP and Branch Manager at WaFd Bank & Community Ambassador 03:35 - Boise Chamber Connector of the Year 2025 06:04 - Leadership Boise vs. Leadership Meridian 08:07 - 30 Years in the Treasure Valley 08:44 - The ALICE Population: Why Nonprofits Matter 16:35 - Paying It Forward - Local Hiring & Living Wages 22:04 - Adrienne's Career Journey: From Restaurants to Banking 26:45 - The Entrepreneur Mindset: From Kitty Cat to Tiger 29:58 - Adrienne's Personal "Why": Married at 16, Four Kids by 21 34:34 - Steph's Hawai'i Roots & Family Food Insecurity 36:43 - Tourism's Hidden Cost on Local Hawaiian Communities 40:11 - Descendants of King Kamehameha 42:38 - Idaho's Housing & Wage Crisis 47:35 - Social Media, Body Image & the Next Generation 59:39 - The Power of Asking "Why" 1:00:50 - Open Dialogue: Politics, Shared Values & Seeking to Understand 1:05:48 - Is Your Glass Half Full or Empty? 1:10:39 - Final Question: Who Are You at Your Core? 1:15:32 - JC: Jesus & Coffee - What Gets You Out of Bed 1:17:22 - Steph's Why: Adventure & Following People's Journeys 1:21:22 - Closing & Thank You

What if the thing that saved you as a kid is now the thing you're building for the next generation? In this episode of The Essence of You, host Steph Lokelani sits down with two of her closest friends - Allison Terenzio-Moody, Executive Director of Treasure Valley Children's Theater (TVCT), and her husband Noah Moody, playwright, director, and educator - for a warm, funny, and unexpectedly moving conversation about the transformative power of the arts. From running through caves dodging zombies in a 48-hour horror film to running one of the Treasure Valley's most beloved nonprofit theaters, Allison and Noah share the journey that brought them to where they are today. The three dig into why children's theater deserves the same respect as any other art form, the life skills it quietly builds in young people, and the very real ways TVCT has been a lifeline for kids who had nowhere else to turn. Noah opens up about growing up feeling like he didn't belong until the stage gave him a world where he did. Allison reflects on becoming the advocate, grizzly bear mama, and community builder she never knew she'd need to be. And Steph brings her own stories: a production of You're a Good Man, Charlie Brown that made her realize performance was her dream, and a childhood friendship forged under stage lights that survived a decade and a random run-in in Cambodia. They also get into the real talk around sustaining a nonprofit: what it means to never turn away a child because of finances, the emotional weight of parents who apologize for needing help, and why Idaho Gives (May 4–7) is such a critical moment for organizations like TVCT. This one is joyful, honest, and full of heart. Whether you're a theater kid at heart, a parent wondering if the arts are "worth it," or someone still searching for your people, this episode is for you. 🎭 About Treasure Valley Children's Theater: TVCT is a nonprofit theater company dedicated to making the arts accessible to every child in the Treasure Valley, regardless of financial circumstance. They offer classes, productions, camps, and school tour shows. And they never turn a student away. 💛 Support their work: https://www.treasurevalleychildrenstheater.com/ and donate during Idaho Gives (May 4-7) at: https://www.idahogives.org/organizations/treasure-valley-childrens-theater 📲 Follow us on social media and subscribe so you never miss an episode! About our Guests: Allison Terenzio-Moody (she/her) earned her B.A. in English and Creative Writing from Seattle University and her Master’s in Education from New York University. Before being named the Executive Director of Treasure Valley Children’s Theater (TVCT) in 2023, she spent over eight years teaching, developing curriculum, and serving as the TVCT Education Director. Noah Moody is an actor, educator, and writer at Treasure Valley Children's Theater. Born and raised in Boise, ID and about to celebrate 10 years with the company, he has also been a theater artist in the Treasure Valley for the last 20 years. Having performed with the likes of Idaho Shakespeare Festival, Boise Contemporary Theatre, Alley Repertory Theater, Noah is very proud to call TVCT his home for the past decade along with his amazing and remarkably patient wife, TVCT Executive Director Allison Terenzio Moody. Chapters: 0:00 – Cold Open & Welcome 0:35 – Introducing Allison Terenzio-Moody & Noah Moody 3:37 – Allison's TVCT Story: From Actor to Executive Director 4:59 – Noah's 10 Years at TVCT 7:54 – Why Children's Theater Deserves Respect 15:11 – Origin Stories: How They Each Fell in Love with Theater 27:50 – What the Stage Really Teaches Kids 35:00 – Finding Your People: Community, Belonging & Beating Loneliness 40:43 – TVCT as a Nonprofit: Scholarships & Never Turning Kids Away 49:53 – Idaho Gives: How You Can Support TVCT This Week 53:57 – Who Are You at Your Core? 1:05:27 – Closing Thoughts & Gratitude

What does it mean to look like you fit in everywhere but feel like you belong nowhere? Angela Reish knows that feeling well. In our third episode of The Essence of You, host Steph Lokelani sits down with her longtime friend Angela, a woman she first met through the belly dancing community years ago, who describes herself as "espresso in a sea of milk." On the surface, Angela looks like she checks all the "typical American girl" boxes. But scratch a little deeper and you'll find a woman forged by post-WWII German immigrants, four years in the US Air Force, a marriage of two radically different worlds, and a calling to show up for kids that nobody else sees. Angela grew up in a house where the inside was Germany and the outside was America, and her parents never quite understood the threshold between the two. Her father, who lost his own dad to the war, spent part of his childhood in a work camp in postwar Germany. Her mother was bombed out multiple times before the family immigrated first to Canada, then to California. That Old World upbringing - strict, formal, blunt, and deeply regimented - shaped Angela in ways she's still unpacking.  Steph and Angela talk about the invisible weight of being raised between two cultures, how those roots show up in your parenting, your marriage, and even the way you end a phone call (Germans just... hang up). Angela shares her years in the Air Force, which fit her German wiring perfectly, and the rude awakening of re-entering civilian life where military experience was largely dismissed. She reflects on a marriage between two people who came from completely different worlds, and the hard, funny, real work of raising a son. Then there's the work she does now. Angela is a nearly-full-time substitute teacher, and she has thoughts. She paints a vivid and honest picture of what teachers actually deal with, classrooms full of kids who are each a product of entirely different home lives, traumas, privileges, and cultures. She talks about finding her people in the theater and choir kids, creating a safe space for an LGBTQ+ student who told her she'd never met someone her age so open, and the quietly profound experience of working with the RISE program for nonverbal, special-needs students. And yes, there's a bully story. A sophomore, a jacket from Chinatown, a school bus, and fifty kicks in the back. Angela tells it with the kind of humor and grace that only comes from having fully survived something. At the core of this conversation is a woman who gives a damn - loudly, imperfectly, and without apology. Angela is proof that the most interesting people often look the most ordinary on the surface, and that showing up for others, even when nobody's paying you nearly enough to do it, is one of the most quietly radical things a human being can do. Subscribe to The Essence of You wherever you listen to podcasts, and if this episode resonated with you, share it with someone who needs to hear it and let me know if you'd like to be a guest. 🎧 About Angela Reish: Angela Reish’s journey is rooted in service, resilience, and growth. Gen X now 57, like the ketchup, she began her career in the Air Force before spending 25 years in the corporate world. In the past three years, she’s embraced a new chapter as a high school substitute teacher, continuing her commitment to making a difference. Married for 28 years and proud of her German heritage, Angela brings a grounded perspective shaped by life experience, adaptability, and perseverance. Chapters 00:00 – Welcome & Introduction 00:29 – How Steph & Angela Met Through Belly Dancing 04:10 – Angela on Watching Steph's Creative Journey 06:59 – "What Makes You Different?" 07:32 – Growing Up With German Immigrant Parents 09:50 – Father's WWII Story: A Family Shaped by War 12:12 – Immigration to Canada, Then California 14:43 – When the Inside of Your House Is Germany & the Outside Is America 19:53 – Living in Idaho for 21 Years as a Non-Native 21:10 – The International Perspective (ft. Reham) 23:09 – Marriage, Parenting & Clashing Upbringings 29:25 – Husband's First Trips Abroad 32:20 – The Air Force Years: Her Version of College 39:28 – Corporate America: HP, Micron & Silicon Valley Rules 42:17 – Becoming a Substitute Teacher Post-COVID 44:38 – What Teaching Actually Looks Like (What People Don't See) 48:39 – Elementary vs. Junior High vs. High School Energy 51:23 – Building Real Connections With Students 53:18 – Creating Safe Space for LGBTQ+ Youth 57:50 – The Bully Story: A Jacket, a Bus & Standing Your Ground 01:07:01 – The RISE Program & The Gift of Nonverbal Kids 01:11:59 – Being Dismissed as "Just a Sub" 01:15:53 – Final Question: Who Are You at Your Core?

What does it take to stop just surviving and start truly living? In this episode of The Essence of You, host Steph Lokelani sits down with Mindy Love - entrepreneur, community builder, and single mother of seven - for a deeply honest and joyful conversation about life after hardship, the power of thinking differently, and what it really means to know yourself. Mindy shares the near-drowning experience on the Boise River that forced her to ask: What do I actually want to do with my life? From a difficult upbringing, to marrying young and raising seven children, to finding herself on the other side, Mindy's story is one of radical self-awareness, resilience, and choosing joy on purpose. Steph and Mindy cover everything from the life-changing lessons of improv comedy, to morning routines, bachata dancing, solo travel in Europe, the realities of social media vs. real life, raising self-sufficient kids, entrepreneurship, and the mindset shift that makes all the difference. If you've ever felt like you don't fit in one box, this episode is for you. Subscribe so you don't miss future episodes, leave a comment on what resonated with you the most, and let Steph know if you'd like to be a future guest! In this episode, you'll hear about: - How improv comedy helped Mindy come out of her shell and find her people - The near-drowning accident that changed everything and the peace she found underwater - Why Steph believes having a "backup plan" means not believing in yourself - Morning routines, intentional scheduling, and self-care for the chronically busy - Raising seven kids as a single mom and Mindy's unique "zone of ownership" system for the home - Why Mindy thinks differently about money, happiness, and what it means to truly live - The work-life balance lessons Mindy learned traveling through Amsterdam, Paris, and Spain - Navigating social media, comparison culture, and sharing your real story - The deep question: Who are you at your core, when all the labels fall away? About Mindy Love: Mindy Love is a multifaceted woman who is passionate about empowering others to step into their full potential. She sees the world through a unique lens and loves sharing her ideas, thoughts, and encouragement in a way that inspires real change. With a degree in English and Anthropology, her path has been anything but traditional—she’s held many roles over the years, from cosmetologist to ESL teacher to business owner, and is also a licensed real estate professional in Idaho. A lifelong learner and world traveler, she brings curiosity and perspective into everything she does. No matter where life has taken her, she always comes back to storytelling—whether that was writing for a small-town newspaper, sharing positive community stories, or studying and speaking on radio in college. She’s also a single mom of seven, determined to create a life she truly loves, and finds joy in reading, writing, dancing, and anything that connects her to freedom—especially horses. Chapters: 00:00 – Cold Open: "I just want to create a fun, happy life that works for me" 00:55 – Welcome & Introduction: Meet Mindy Love 01:51 – Why Mindy Got Into Improv Comedy 04:57 – Thinking Differently: Mindy's Unique Perspective on Life 06:23 – The Near-Drowning Experience on the Boise River 09:17 – 45 Days of Recovery and the Question That Changed Everything 10:37 – Shifts Mindy Made: Morning Routines and Intentional Time 11:51 – Dancing as Joy: Bachata, Swing, and Finding Your Happy Place 15:00 – After Divorce: Solo Trip to Florida and Starting Over 18:00 – Prioritizing Fun and Scheduling Joy Into Your Week 20:30 – Community, Loneliness, and What We Really Need from Each Other 24:30 – Kids, Screen Time, and Getting Off Electronics 26:50 – Social Media, the Highlight Reel, and Showing Your Real Life 27:20 – What Experience Most Shaped Who You Are Today (Childhood & Faith) 33:00 – Curiosity, Empathy, and Understanding Both Sides 36:00 – Giving Grace to Strangers and Staying in a Good Mood 40:00 – Self-Care When You Only Have 15 Minutes a Day 44:00 – Progress Over Perfection and Tiny Improvements 45:40 – Travel and European Work-Life Balance (Amsterdam, Paris, Spain) 49:50 – Growing Up in Hawaii and the Healing Power of the Ocean 54:00 – Parenting Seven Kids as a Single Mom: Survival Mode to Thriving 57:00 – The "Zone of Ownership" System for Running a Household 59:00 – Mental Health, Motherhood, and Teaching Kids Life Skills 01:01:00 – Entrepreneurship, Ideas, and Passive Streams of Income 01:03:47 – Closing Question: Who Are You at Your Core? 01:05:43 – Final Words of Encouragement from Mindy

Welcome to the very first episode of The Essence of You Podcast, recorded live on Pi Day (March 14th) in front of a real audience in Boise, Idaho! Host Steph Lokelani sits down with three incredible guests: Karma Metzler Fitzgerald (Community Leader), Reham Aarti (Arab American Mosaic Artist), and Mike Krause (Executive Coach & Mental Performance Strategist). Together, they dive deep into what it means to live authentically, lead with purpose, and show up for the people around you, even when burnout, imposter syndrome, and a chaotic world are telling you to stay home. From a 400-pound mosaic, to running for state office on impulse, to finding life on the stage, these are stories of saying "yes" before you feel ready. The conversation ranges from the collapse of civic community and the broken nonprofit funding model, to matriarchal leadership, joy as resistance, and why knowing your own values is the antidote to exhaustion. Raw, real, funny, and deeply human. This is the Essence of You. Subscribe so you don't miss future episodes, leave a comment on what resonated with you the most, and let Steph know if you'd like to be a guest! Guest Bios: Karma Metzler Fitzgerald currently identifies as exhausted. Life just keeps… lifing… so her priority is resting when possible and finding joy in the beautiful and sacred ordinary. Karma grew up a few blocks away in a working class family here in Boise, while splitting time with her farm family a few hours down the road in Buhl. She’s a typical Idaho girl – playing in the mud all day and attending the grand ball at night. Along the twisted road of adulthood, she’s worked everywhere from the governor’s office to the family kitchen. The constant has always been words and a passion for stringing them together in such a way that those words change a moment or a lifetime. In Lincoln County, where she lived for thirty years, she co-created a community supported child care program for every child from birth to graduation. Karma also developed a rural public transportation program to get residents where they need to be at low or no cost.  These days, Karma’s fully embracing her crone era. She leads with  fierce compassion seeking ways to connect people to the resources they need to thrive. Now back in Boise she is content to create a pollinator pathway in her neighborhood, muck about in her worm bins, and putter in her yard and garden. She does this while looking for opportunities to lead, build connection, and,  on occasion, stir up some trouble. Reham Aarti is an Arab American mosaic artist, activist, author, and mother of two whose work celebrates resilience, cultural identity, and community. Over a 29-year career, she has created mosaic installations across the United States and internationally. Reham is deeply committed to using art as a tool for connection and healing, including founding a 17-year program bringing mosaic workshops to children at St. Luke’s Hospital. Through public art, community murals, and educational outreach, she works to create spaces where creativity, compassion, and belonging can thrive. Mike Krause is an executive coach and mental performance strategist with Global Bound, LLC, where he partners with executives and emerging leaders to enhance performance, support sustainable growth, and strengthen holistic wellbeing both inside and outside the workplace. He brings over 25 years of executive leadership experience in the nonprofit sector, including 4½ years with the United States Department of State in Southern and Central Africa, where his work focused on public health initiatives and cross-cultural leadership. Mike serves as an executive coach for the Idaho Leads program and is the developer and lead facilitator of the Ascending Leaders initiative through the Idaho Community Foundation. He is currently pursuing a master’s degree in Sport and Performance Psychology, while co-hosting a weekly podcast and traveling throughout the country speaking on leadership, workplace culture, and mental fitness practices. Chapters: 00:00 – Welcome & Pi Day Origin Story 01:00 – Introducing the Podcast 02:30 – Guest Introductions 04:50 – Reham's Mosaic Art 16:30 – Karma's Journey: Journalism, Farming & Running for State Office 24:00 – Karma on Community & Leading Change 37:30 – Reham on Public Art & Volunteers 41:15 – Mike's Journey: From Meridian to Chicago and back 57:00 – Steph's Story: Filmmaking & Nonprofits 59:00 – Balancing Compassion Fatigue & Joy as Resistance 01:03:45 – Women as Community Glue & Matriarchal Leadership 01:06:00 – Imposter Syndrome: Wearing a Mask vs. Knowing Who You Are 01:17:00 – Audience Q&A: Burnout, Nonprofits & Getting Involved 01:20:00 – The Broken Nonprofit Funding Model 01:22:30 – Creating Sanctuary & Rebuilding Local Community 01:26:00 – "Bowling Alone": How Civic Disconnection Threatens Democracy 01:30:00 – Know Your Values, Get Out of Your Head & Lead with Stewardship 01:34:00 – Closing Thoughts