The PGspot

What happens when men are taught from an early age to be strong, independent, and in control, but rarely taught how to be vulnerable?In this episode of The PGspot: Taking the X out of Sex, we take a closer look at the complicated relationship between masculinity, vulnerability, emotional connection, and sexuality. Many men have been socialized to believe that expressing fear, insecurity, sadness, or even sexual concerns makes them weak, leaving them with few tools for communicating what they actually need or feel.And when vulnerability becomes difficult, intimacy can suffer. This can show up as difficulty talking about sex, avoiding conversations about desire or sexual problems, withdrawing after rejection, or struggling to communicate emotions within a relationship.We’ll explore where some of these messages about masculinity come from, how they can affect relationships and sexual connection, and why creating space for vulnerability may actually be one of the strongest things a man can do.Because vulnerability isn't weakness. It is a pathway to connection, intimacy, and being truly known.I would love to hear your feedback about today's episode, as well as any questions or topics that you would like addressed in future episodes. Although "Fanmail" doesn't allow for me to respond back directly, I am happy to address any questions in upcoming episodes. Thank you for listening and taking the time to message The PGspot through Fanmail!If you want to learn more about sexual health, sexual dysfunction, or how to improve your sex life, follow me on Instagram at @thepgspot or check out my website at doctorpattyj.com for blogs and resources related to sex positivity and real talk about sexuality.  As as always, stay curious, stay empowered, and stay you.

Some couples don't stop loving each other, they simply stop reaching for each other. Over time, busy schedules, stress, mismatched desire, rejection, resentment, and unresolved hurt can slowly create distance. Touch becomes less frequent. Sex becomes harder to talk about. Avoiding the conversation feels easier than risking another rejection or another uncomfortable discussion. Eventually, a couple can find themselves functioning well as partners in life while feeling more like roommates than lovers.In this episode of The PGspot: Taking the X out of Sex, we explore how that transition happens, why couples can become trapped in cycles of pressure and avoidance, and what it takes to begin reconnecting. We'll talk about desire discrepancy, the ways couples unintentionally reinforce sexual disconnection, the loss of everyday affection and touch, and why rebuilding intimacy isn't simply about having more sex. Most importantly, we'll look at how couples can begin creating safety, connection, and desire again, and how this often starts with small changes that have nothing to do with intercourse.Because becoming roommates usually happens gradually. And finding your way back to each other can happen gradually, too.I would love to hear your feedback about today's episode, as well as any questions or topics that you would like addressed in future episodes. Although "Fanmail" doesn't allow for me to respond back directly, I am happy to address any questions in upcoming episodes. Thank you for listening and taking the time to message The PGspot through Fanmail!If you want to learn more about sexual health, sexual dysfunction, or how to improve your sex life, follow me on Instagram at @thepgspot or check out my website at doctorpattyj.com for blogs and resources related to sex positivity and real talk about sexuality.  As as always, stay curious, stay empowered, and stay you.

Low sexual desire is often treated like a simple problem: the desire is missing, so let’s figure out how to get it back. But female sexual desire is rarely that straightforward. In this episode, we’re looking at the bigger picture behind decreased sexual desire and the many pieces that can influence whether sex feels appealing, accessible, or even worth considering.We’ll explore five key areas to consider when assessing low desire. From hormones, medications, sleep, and stress to emotional connection, sexual experiences, relationship dynamics, and everything else competing for attention, each piece can affect the desire puzzle in different ways.Because sometimes the answer isn’t simply “how do we increase libido?” The better question may be: What’s getting in the way of desire in the first place? In this episode we’ll take the pieces apart and look at the whole picture.I would love to hear your feedback about today's episode, as well as any questions or topics that you would like addressed in future episodes. Although "Fanmail" doesn't allow for me to respond back directly, I am happy to address any questions in upcoming episodes. Thank you for listening and taking the time to message The PGspot through Fanmail!If you want to learn more about sexual health, sexual dysfunction, or how to improve your sex life, follow me on Instagram at @thepgspot or check out my website at doctorpattyj.com for blogs and resources related to sex positivity and real talk about sexuality.  As as always, stay curious, stay empowered, and stay you.

Menopause is finally having its moment. What was once a topic whispered about behind closed doors is now front and center on podcasts, Instagram, TikTok, and in celebrity interviews. Women are sharing their experiences, asking questions, and demanding better care, and that's a good thing.But has the conversation swung too far in the other direction?In this episode, we explore how social media has transformed menopause awareness while also fueling misinformation, fear, and unrealistic expectations. We'll discuss why hormone therapy isn't the right answer for every woman, how to separate evidence from influencer advice, the recent estradiol patch shortage, and why finding a knowledgeable healthcare provider has never been more important.Whether you're approaching menopause, currently navigating it, or caring for someone who is, this episode will help you cut through the noise so you can make informed decisions based on science, not social media.I would love to hear your feedback about today's episode, as well as any questions or topics that you would like addressed in future episodes. Although "Fanmail" doesn't allow for me to respond back directly, I am happy to address any questions in upcoming episodes. Thank you for listening and taking the time to message The PGspot through Fanmail!If you want to learn more about sexual health, sexual dysfunction, or how to improve your sex life, follow me on Instagram at @thepgspot or check out my website at doctorpattyj.com for blogs and resources related to sex positivity and real talk about sexuality.  As as always, stay curious, stay empowered, and stay you.

We spend so much time talking about the red flags we should avoid in relationships that we often overlook the qualities that truly help love thrive. In this episode, we're shifting the focus to the green flags; the behaviors, attitudes, and patterns that create emotional safety, trust, and lasting connection.We'll explore what healthy communication really looks like, why conflict doesn't have to be something to fear, and how respect, curiosity, accountability, and emotional responsiveness strengthen intimacy over time. Whether you're dating, married, or simply reflecting on your own relationships, this conversation will help you recognize the signs of a partnership that supports growth instead of draining it.Healthy relationships aren't perfect. They're built by two imperfect people who are willing to learn, repair, and choose each other again and again. Join me as we unpack the green flags that matter most and discover how to cultivate a relationship where both partners feel seen, heard, valued, and loved.I would love to hear your feedback about today's episode, as well as any questions or topics that you would like addressed in future episodes. Although "Fanmail" doesn't allow for me to respond back directly, I am happy to address any questions in upcoming episodes. Thank you for listening and taking the time to message The PGspot through Fanmail!If you want to learn more about sexual health, sexual dysfunction, or how to improve your sex life, follow me on Instagram at @thepgspot or check out my website at doctorpattyj.com for blogs and resources related to sex positivity and real talk about sexuality.  As as always, stay curious, stay empowered, and stay you.

World Population Day often sparks conversations about birth rates, population growth, and demographic change. But behind the statistics lies a more fundamental question: who gets to decide whether, when, and under what circumstances to have children?In this episode, we explore the complex history of contraception and family planning, from the expansion of reproductive freedom to the troubling influence of eugenic policies that shaped public health initiatives in the twentieth century. We'll examine how reproductive justice emerged as a framework that goes beyond access to contraception, emphasizing the right to have children, not have children, and the right to parent in safe and supportive communities.We'll also discuss how modern concerns about declining birth rates, aging populations, and economic growth intersect with reproductive decision-making, and why factors like affordable childcare, paid parental leave, accessible healthcare, housing security, and economic stability often influence family planning choices as much as biology itself. Join us for a nuanced conversation about population, policy, history, and the importance of protecting reproductive autonomy in a rapidly changing world.I would love to hear your feedback about today's episode, as well as any questions or topics that you would like addressed in future episodes. Although "Fanmail" doesn't allow for me to respond back directly, I am happy to address any questions in upcoming episodes. Thank you for listening and taking the time to message The PGspot through Fanmail!If you want to learn more about sexual health, sexual dysfunction, or how to improve your sex life, follow me on Instagram at @thepgspot or check out my website at doctorpattyj.com for blogs and resources related to sex positivity and real talk about sexuality.  As as always, stay curious, stay empowered, and stay you.

When it comes to sexual health treatments, why have men historically had more options than women? In this episode of The PG Spot, Dr. Patty Jalomo explores the fascinating and controversial journey of Addyi (flibanserin), the first FDA-approved medication for acquired, generalized hypoactive sexual desire disorder (HSDD) in premenopausal women.We'll dive into the years-long approval process, the advocacy movement that challenged the FDA, and the debates surrounding safety, efficacy, and gender equity in medicine. Along the way, we'll examine a larger question: Why has women's sexual health research lagged behind men's, and how has that affected treatment options for low desire and sexual dysfunction?Whether you're a healthcare professional, a woman struggling with low desire, or simply curious about the intersection of science, policy, and sexual health, this episode sheds light on the ongoing effort to close the gap in sexual medicine and ensure that women's sexual well-being receives the attention it deserves.Join us as we explore the story behind the "little pink pill" and what it reveals about the future of women's sexual health.I would love to hear your feedback about today's episode, as well as any questions or topics that you would like addressed in future episodes. Although "Fanmail" doesn't allow for me to respond back directly, I am happy to address any questions in upcoming episodes. Thank you for listening and taking the time to message The PGspot through Fanmail!If you want to learn more about sexual health, sexual dysfunction, or how to improve your sex life, follow me on Instagram at @thepgspot or check out my website at doctorpattyj.com for blogs and resources related to sex positivity and real talk about sexuality.  As as always, stay curious, stay empowered, and stay you.

Sexual desire and ADHD in women is rarely talked about openly, but it affects far more people than most realize. In this episode, we explore the complex relationship between ADHD, dopamine, sensory processing, emotional regulation, burnout, and intimacy. From fluctuating libido and novelty-seeking to shutdown, overwhelm, and relationship challenges, this conversation breaks down the experiences many women have silently struggled to understand.We also discuss why ADHD sexuality is not one-size-fits-all, how hormones and stress can intensify symptoms, and what practical strategies may help women reconnect with desire without shame or self-blame.Whether you have ADHD yourself, love someone who does, or simply want a deeper understanding of women’s sexual health and neurodiversity, this episode opens the door to a conversation that has been missing for far too long.I would love to hear your feedback about today's episode, as well as any questions or topics that you would like addressed in future episodes. Although "Fanmail" doesn't allow for me to respond back directly, I am happy to address any questions in upcoming episodes. Thank you for listening and taking the time to message The PGspot through Fanmail!If you want to learn more about sexual health, sexual dysfunction, or how to improve your sex life, follow me on Instagram at @thepgspot or check out my website at doctorpattyj.com for blogs and resources related to sex positivity and real talk about sexuality.  As as always, stay curious, stay empowered, and stay you.

In this episode of The PGspot, we explore the complex and often overlooked effects of GLP-1 medications beyond weight loss. While these treatments are transforming the landscape of obesity care, their impact doesn’t stop at the number on the scale. We dive into the nuanced connections between GLP-1 use, changes in libido, and the evolving sense of identity that can accompany rapid physical transformation.How do shifting hormones, body image, and self-perception influence intimacy and relationships? What happens when the external changes outpace the internal adjustment? This conversation unpacks the psychological, emotional, and relational layers of weight loss in a way that goes far deeper than before-and-after photos.If you’ve ever wondered how weight loss medications intersect with sexuality, confidence, and identity, this episode offers insight, validation, and a more holistic perspective on what it really means to change your body, and yourself.I would love to hear your feedback about today's episode, as well as any questions or topics that you would like addressed in future episodes. Although "Fanmail" doesn't allow for me to respond back directly, I am happy to address any questions in upcoming episodes. Thank you for listening and taking the time to message The PGspot through Fanmail!If you want to learn more about sexual health, sexual dysfunction, or how to improve your sex life, follow me on Instagram at @thepgspot or check out my website at doctorpattyj.com for blogs and resources related to sex positivity and real talk about sexuality.  As as always, stay curious, stay empowered, and stay you.

Intimacy doesn’t usually fall apart overnight, it fades in the small, everyday ways we show up (or don’t) in our relationships. In this episode, we’re breaking down five common ways we unintentionally sabotage intimacy and what we can start doing differently.From letting flirting and playfulness disappear, to expecting sex to “just happen,” to avoiding the conversations that actually bring us closer…these patterns are more common than you think. And the truth is, most of us were never taught how to nurture intimacy in a sustainable, connected way.We’ll also talk about why focusing on performance over connection can backfire, how unspoken resentment quietly erodes desire, and why communication is one of the most powerful (and underused) tools in our relationships.If you’ve ever felt disconnected, stuck in routine, or unsure how to reconnect with your partner, this episode is for you.Because awareness is the first step…but action is what creates change.I would love to hear your feedback about today's episode, as well as any questions or topics that you would like addressed in future episodes. Although "Fanmail" doesn't allow for me to respond back directly, I am happy to address any questions in upcoming episodes. Thank you for listening and taking the time to message The PGspot through Fanmail!If you want to learn more about sexual health, sexual dysfunction, or how to improve your sex life, follow me on Instagram at @thepgspot or check out my website at doctorpattyj.com for blogs and resources related to sex positivity and real talk about sexuality.  As as always, stay curious, stay empowered, and stay you.

In this powerful and deeply important episode, Awareness and Action Against Sex Trafficking, we shed light on one of the most pressing human rights issues of our time. We provide a clear understanding of what sex trafficking is, who it affects, and the lasting physical, psychological, and emotional impact on survivors.Most importantly, this episode calls listeners into action. From recognizing red flags to knowing how to report suspected trafficking and support survivors, we provide practical, actionable steps that empower individuals to make a difference.This is more than an educational episode; it’s a call to awareness, compassion, and responsibility. Whether you’re new to this topic or looking to deepen your understanding, this conversation is a vital step toward advocacy and change.Resources for Sex Trafficking Awareness and Support1. National Human Trafficking Hotline (U.S.)Phone: 1-888-373-7888 Text: 233733 (Text “HELP”) Website: https://humantraffickinghotline.org Provides 24/7 confidential reporting and support for victims, survivors, and concerned community members. 2. Polaris ProjectWebsite: https://polarisproject.org Offers survivor resources, guides on identifying trafficking, policy information, and professional training. 3. U.S. Department of Homeland Security – Blue CampaignWebsite: https://www.dhs.gov/blue-campaign Educates the public on recognizing human trafficking and reporting suspected cases safely. 4. U.S. Department of Health & Human Services – Trafficking Resource CenterPhone: 1-888-373-7888 Website: https://www.acf.hhs.gov/otip Provides information and guidance for healthcare providers, social service professionals, and victims seeking help. 5. RAINN (Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network)Phone: 1-800-656-HOPE (4673) Website: https://www.rainn.org Offers resources for survivors of sexual assault, including trafficking victims, with confidential support and referrals. 6. End It MovementWebsite: https://enditmovement.com An advocacy organization focused on raising awareness about human trafficking and promoting safe avenues for survivor support. I would love to hear your feedback about today's episode, as well as any questions or topics that you would like addressed in future episodes. Although "Fanmail" doesn't allow for me to respond back directly, I am happy to address any questions in upcoming episodes. Thank you for listening and taking the time to message The PGspot through Fanmail!If you want to learn more about sexual health, sexual dysfunction, or how to improve your sex life, follow me on Instagram at @thepgspot or check out my website at doctorpattyj.com for blogs and resources related to sex positivity and real talk about sexuality.  As as always, stay curious, stay empowered, and stay you.

In this episode, we explore what research actually says about consensual non-monogamy (CNM). While monogamy is often treated as the default relationship model, studies over the past two decades have examined how some people successfully build ethical, transparent relationships outside of that structure.We’ll look at the communication strategies, boundary-setting practices, and emotional skills that researchers have found are common in successful CNM relationships. We’ll also discuss topics like jealousy, trust, and relationship agreements—and what these findings might reveal about healthy relationship dynamics more broadly.Whether you're simply curious, skeptical, or exploring alternative relationship structures yourself, this episode offers a research-informed look at how and why consensual non-monogamy can work for some people.I would love to hear your feedback about today's episode, as well as any questions or topics that you would like addressed in future episodes. Although "Fanmail" doesn't allow for me to respond back directly, I am happy to address any questions in upcoming episodes. Thank you for listening and taking the time to message The PGspot through Fanmail!If you want to learn more about sexual health, sexual dysfunction, or how to improve your sex life, follow me on Instagram at @thepgspot or check out my website at doctorpattyj.com for blogs and resources related to sex positivity and real talk about sexuality.  As as always, stay curious, stay empowered, and stay you.

Pornography is no longer something kids “might” encounter someday, it’s something many are exposed to earlier than parents expect. And when we don’t talk about it, the internet becomes their primary teacher.In this episode, we explore why avoiding the conversation about pornography doesn’t protect kids, and how silence can unintentionally create shame, secrecy, and confusion. You’ll learn what research says about early exposure, why curiosity is developmentally normal, and how proactive, age-appropriate conversations can strengthen trust rather than threaten innocence.We’ll also discuss how to approach these conversations calmly and confidently, what messages kids actually need to hear, and how open dialogue lays the groundwork for healthier relationships, stronger boundaries, and long-term sexual wellbeing.This isn’t about fear. It’s about preparation, connection, and becoming a safe place for your child in a world where explicit content is only a click away.I would love to hear your feedback about today's episode, as well as any questions or topics that you would like addressed in future episodes. Although "Fanmail" doesn't allow for me to respond back directly, I am happy to address any questions in upcoming episodes. Thank you for listening and taking the time to message The PGspot through Fanmail!If you want to learn more about sexual health, sexual dysfunction, or how to improve your sex life, follow me on Instagram at @thepgspot or check out my website at doctorpattyj.com for blogs and resources related to sex positivity and real talk about sexuality.  As as always, stay curious, stay empowered, and stay you.

Sexual fantasies are far more common (and far more meaningful) than most of us were ever taught. In this episode, we explore why we have sexual fantasies in the first place, what the research says about the most common themes, and what these inner storylines reflect about human desire.You’ll learn how fantasies often speak to universal needs; like wanting to feel desired, powerful, free, adventurous, or deeply connected, rather than signaling something is “wrong” or shameful. We’ll also talk about what fantasies do not mean, and how understanding them can reduce shame, increase self-awareness, and even enhance intimacy, connection, and sexual satisfaction in relationships.If you’ve ever wondered, Is this normal? What does this say about me? Should I tell my partner?, this episode is for you.I would love to hear your feedback about today's episode, as well as any questions or topics that you would like addressed in future episodes. Although "Fanmail" doesn't allow for me to respond back directly, I am happy to address any questions in upcoming episodes. Thank you for listening and taking the time to message The PGspot through Fanmail!If you want to learn more about sexual health, sexual dysfunction, or how to improve your sex life, follow me on Instagram at @thepgspot or check out my website at doctorpattyj.com for blogs and resources related to sex positivity and real talk about sexuality.  As as always, stay curious, stay empowered, and stay you.

Understanding Sexual Disgust and Desire explores how attraction and aversion are shaped by both biology and experience. In this episode, we look at sexual disgust through an evolutionary lens, how it developed as a protective mechanism and why it still influences desire today. We also examine how factors such as stress, relational safety, past experiences, cultural messaging, and gender differences affect the delicate balance between desire and aversion.This conversation offers a compassionate framework for understanding shifts in libido that are often confusing or misunderstood, and invites listeners to move beyond shame toward curiosity and connection.I would love to hear your feedback about today's episode, as well as any questions or topics that you would like addressed in future episodes. Although "Fanmail" doesn't allow for me to respond back directly, I am happy to address any questions in upcoming episodes. Thank you for listening and taking the time to message The PGspot through Fanmail!If you want to learn more about sexual health, sexual dysfunction, or how to improve your sex life, follow me on Instagram at @thepgspot or check out my website at doctorpattyj.com for blogs and resources related to sex positivity and real talk about sexuality.  As as always, stay curious, stay empowered, and stay you.

Reframing Men, Sex, and Desire challenges the way we’ve been taught to think about male sexuality. Popular culture often reduces men to simple, one-dimensional narratives, always wanting sex, driven purely by biology, and emotionally disconnected. In this episode, we slow that story down and take a more nuanced look at how men actually experience desire.Through honest reflection and thoughtful conversation, we explore how emotional safety, stress, self-image, and relational dynamics shape men’s sexual interest just as much as hormones do. We also unpack how shame, performance pressure, and rigid gender expectations can suppress desire rather than fuel it.This episode invites listeners to move beyond stereotypes and toward empathy, whether you’re a man trying to better understand yourself, a partner seeking deeper connection, or simply curious about how desire really works. Reframing men and sex isn’t about lowering expectations, it’s about expanding understanding and creating space for healthier, more authentic intimacy.I would love to hear your feedback about today's episode, as well as any questions or topics that you would like addressed in future episodes. Although "Fanmail" doesn't allow for me to respond back directly, I am happy to address any questions in upcoming episodes. Thank you for listening and taking the time to message The PGspot through Fanmail!If you want to learn more about sexual health, sexual dysfunction, or how to improve your sex life, follow me on Instagram at @thepgspot or check out my website at doctorpattyj.com for blogs and resources related to sex positivity and real talk about sexuality.  As as always, stay curious, stay empowered, and stay you.

In this episode, we explore the emerging role of trauma-informed, plant-based therapies in sexual health and healing. From psychedelic-assisted therapy to plant medicines, we examine how these approaches are being studied and thoughtfully integrated to support individuals navigating sexual trauma, intimacy challenges, and nervous system dysregulation. Whether you’re a clinician, researcher, or someone curious about holistic approaches to sexual wellbeing, this episode offers a grounded and compassionate look at how innovation and plant-based therapies are intersecting in modern sexual health care.I would love to hear your feedback about today's episode, as well as any questions or topics that you would like addressed in future episodes. Although "Fanmail" doesn't allow for me to respond back directly, I am happy to address any questions in upcoming episodes. Thank you for listening and taking the time to message The PGspot through Fanmail!If you want to learn more about sexual health, sexual dysfunction, or how to improve your sex life, follow me on Instagram at @thepgspot or check out my website at doctorpattyj.com for blogs and resources related to sex positivity and real talk about sexuality.  As as always, stay curious, stay empowered, and stay you.

In this episode, we explore the rapidly evolving world of sex technology through a trauma-informed and ethical lens. From apps and wearables designed to support sexual wellness and recovery to AI-driven platforms that promise personalization and connection, sex tech holds both exciting potential and serious responsibilities. We discuss how these innovations can empower users, while also examining critical concerns around consent, data privacy, accessibility, and commercialization of intimacy. Join us for a thoughtful conversation about how sex tech can be developed and used in ways that prioritize safety, autonomy, and healing, without losing sight of the ethical questions that must guide innovation in such a deeply personal space. I would love to hear your feedback about today's episode, as well as any questions or topics that you would like addressed in future episodes. Although "Fanmail" doesn't allow for me to respond back directly, I am happy to address any questions in upcoming episodes. Thank you for listening and taking the time to message The PGspot through Fanmail!If you want to learn more about sexual health, sexual dysfunction, or how to improve your sex life, follow me on Instagram at @thepgspot or check out my website at doctorpattyj.com for blogs and resources related to sex positivity and real talk about sexuality.  As as always, stay curious, stay empowered, and stay you.

In this episode, we explore how sexual feedback (so often a source of tension or defensiveness) can become a pathway to deeper intimacy. You’ll learn when and where these conversations flow most naturally, how to express desires and needs without triggering shame or shutdown, and why timing and tone matter just as much as the words themselves. We'll talk through practical strategies for shaping feedback into an act of care, from aftercare conversations to low-pressure moments like car rides or walks. Whether you’re navigating mismatched desire, hoping to rekindle passion, or simply wanting to communicate with more confidence, this episode offers tools to turn vulnerable moments into opportunities for closeness. Sensate Focus Exercise: Here is the basic exercise. Please note that intercourse is off limits until the later stages of the activity.SENSATE FOCUS I* You will be taking turns sensually caressing, stroking, and feeling your partner’s hands, arms, feet, and legs.* Set aside 20 minutes, three times during the week.* Select a setting where you will have uninterrupted privacy. * Agree to do this activity either clothed or lightly clothed.* Split the 20-minute time into two 10-minute periods. One of you will be the receiver and one the giver of touch during each 10-minute period.* Focus on what feels good to you, not how your partner perceives the touch.  In Step II, you will focus on what feels good for your partner and get immediate feedback. * Try to talk as little as possible during the exercise. You can give feedback later, perhaps the next morning or sometime before you repeat the activity. SENSATE FOCUS II* Follow the guidelines in Sensate Focus I regarding time, frequency, and tuning in to sensations. This time, your partner can give feedback about what feels good to them.SENSATE FOCUS IIIThis is the same idea as Sensate Focus I and II, but now the touching is mutual and if both partners agree, can move to breasts and genitals.* Shift your attention to your enjoyment of your partner’s body.* If you become highly aroused, take a little break and resume touching. The point is to enjoy the journey, not just the destination.SENSATE FOCUS IV AND VContinue as in previous activity sessions.* At some point, move to the female-on-top position without attempting insertion of the penis into the vagina.* In this position, the woman can rub her clitoris, vulva, and vaginal opening against her partner’s penis regardless of whether there is an erection.* Eventually, the woman can insert the tip of the penis into the vagina if there is an erection. Go back to non-genital pleasure if either partner becomes anxious.* After doing this type of play a few times, you will most likely feel ready for intercourse. Keep the focus on your sensations and on nondemand pleasuring. I would love to hear your feedback about today's episode, as well as any questions or topics that you would like addressed in future episodes. Although "Fanmail" doesn't allow for me to respond back directly, I am happy to address any questions in upcoming episodes. Thank you for listening and taking the time to message The PGspot through Fanmail!If you want to learn more about sexual health, sexual dysfunction, or how to improve your sex life, follow me on Instagram at @thepgspot or check out my website at doctorpattyj.com for blogs and resources related to sex positivity and real talk about sexuality.  As as always, stay curious, stay empowered, and stay you.

World AIDS Day is a moment to remember, reflect, and recommit. In Overcoming Silence, we revisit the early days of the AIDS epidemic, an era marked by fear, misinformation, and heartbreaking silence. From uncertainty and stigma to advocacy and progress, this episode honors those we lost, uplifts the communities who fought back, and reminds us that this fight is not over.  Join me as we reflect, learn, and continue breaking the silence together.I would love to hear your feedback about today's episode, as well as any questions or topics that you would like addressed in future episodes. Although "Fanmail" doesn't allow for me to respond back directly, I am happy to address any questions in upcoming episodes. Thank you for listening and taking the time to message The PGspot through Fanmail!If you want to learn more about sexual health, sexual dysfunction, or how to improve your sex life, follow me on Instagram at @thepgspot or check out my website at doctorpattyj.com for blogs and resources related to sex positivity and real talk about sexuality.  As as always, stay curious, stay empowered, and stay you.

 Is your sex life feeling a little routine or predictable? In this episode, we dive into the top 10 ways to reignite passion, deepen intimacy, and bring excitement back into the bedroom. From playful communication and exploring novelty to building emotional connection and prioritizing pleasure, you’ll learn simple, research-backed strategies to help keep desire alive in long-term relationships. Whether you’re looking for a spark or a full-on fire, this episode offers practical, sex-positive insights to help you and your partner reconnect and rediscover each other. Click here for the complete yes/no/maybe list https://doctorpattyj.com/s/YesNoMaybe-Complete-List-1.pdfI would love to hear your feedback about today's episode, as well as any questions or topics that you would like addressed in future episodes. Although "Fanmail" doesn't allow for me to respond back directly, I am happy to address any questions in upcoming episodes. Thank you for listening and taking the time to message The PGspot through Fanmail!If you want to learn more about sexual health, sexual dysfunction, or how to improve your sex life, follow me on Instagram at @thepgspot or check out my website at doctorpattyj.com for blogs and resources related to sex positivity and real talk about sexuality.  As as always, stay curious, stay empowered, and stay you.

Hormones play a vital role in how we feel, think, and function, but misinformation about them is everywhere. In this episode, we’re cutting through the confusion and tackling the top five hormone misconceptions I hear most often from patients. From the truth about hormone therapy and breast cancer risk to why vaginal estrogen isn’t just for people who are sexually active, we’ll unpack what the science actually says and why these myths persist.Whether you’re navigating menopause, curious about hormone replacement therapy, or just want to better understand your body, this episode will leave you feeling informed, empowered, and ready to have evidence-based conversations about your hormonal health.I would love to hear your feedback about today's episode, as well as any questions or topics that you would like addressed in future episodes. Although "Fanmail" doesn't allow for me to respond back directly, I am happy to address any questions in upcoming episodes. Thank you for listening and taking the time to message The PGspot through Fanmail!If you want to learn more about sexual health, sexual dysfunction, or how to improve your sex life, follow me on Instagram at @thepgspot or check out my website at doctorpattyj.com for blogs and resources related to sex positivity and real talk about sexuality.  As as always, stay curious, stay empowered, and stay you.

In this episode, we break down the key takeaways from the recent FDA roundtable where leading physician experts presented compelling data on the safety and efficacy of menopausal hormone therapy (MHT).Tune in as we explore how decades of research are challenging outdated perceptions, what the latest evidence means for patients and providers, and why experts are calling for a more balanced, evidence-based conversation around MHT. Whether you're a clinician, patient, or simply curious about women's health, this episode offers a clear and timely summary of where the science stands today.Topics covered:The evolving safety profile of MHTMisconceptions rooted in past studiesClinical guidance from hormone therapy expertsWhat this means for the future of menopause careI would love to hear your feedback about today's episode, as well as any questions or topics that you would like addressed in future episodes. Although "Fanmail" doesn't allow for me to respond back directly, I am happy to address any questions in upcoming episodes. Thank you for listening and taking the time to message The PGspot through Fanmail!If you want to learn more about sexual health, sexual dysfunction, or how to improve your sex life, follow me on Instagram at @thepgspot or check out my website at doctorpattyj.com for blogs and resources related to sex positivity and real talk about sexuality.  As as always, stay curious, stay empowered, and stay you.

What is ethical porn, and how is it different from the mainstream adult industry? In this episode, we explore the world of ethical porn; a movement that prioritizes consent, fair pay, diversity, and respect for performers both on and off camera.We break down the key differences between ethical and mainstream porn, discuss why it matters for viewers and creators alike, and talk about how to find content that aligns with your values and your desires.Whether you're a curious consumer, a skeptic, or someone rethinking their relationship with adult content, this episode will challenge assumptions, spark conversation, and maybe even change the way you watch.I would love to hear your feedback about today's episode, as well as any questions or topics that you would like addressed in future episodes. Although "Fanmail" doesn't allow for me to respond back directly, I am happy to address any questions in upcoming episodes. Thank you for listening and taking the time to message The PGspot through Fanmail!If you want to learn more about sexual health, sexual dysfunction, or how to improve your sex life, follow me on Instagram at @thepgspot or check out my website at doctorpattyj.com for blogs and resources related to sex positivity and real talk about sexuality.  As as always, stay curious, stay empowered, and stay you.

In this episode, we dive into the physical and psychological factors that can impact male sexual performance, from medical conditions and stress to unrealistic expectations and complex relationship dynamics. Whether you're personally navigating these concerns or supporting someone who is, we’ll share practical strategies to help.We’re also busting some of the most common myths around male sexual performance, because let’s face it, there's a lot of misinformation out there. This is a stigma-free, honest conversation about an issue that affects more people than you might think. Tune in for insight, support, and maybe even a little relief.I would love to hear your feedback about today's episode, as well as any questions or topics that you would like addressed in future episodes. Although "Fanmail" doesn't allow for me to respond back directly, I am happy to address any questions in upcoming episodes. Thank you for listening and taking the time to message The PGspot through Fanmail!If you want to learn more about sexual health, sexual dysfunction, or how to improve your sex life, follow me on Instagram at @thepgspot or check out my website at doctorpattyj.com for blogs and resources related to sex positivity and real talk about sexuality.  As as always, stay curious, stay empowered, and stay you.

Ever wondered what a compounding pharmacist actually does, and why it matters? In this episode, we sit down with pharmacist Justin Clark, the owner of Val Vista compounding pharmacy to explore the world of personalized medicine. From tailoring medications for individual needs to creating solutions when commercial drugs fall short, we dive into how compounding is transforming patient care. Whether it's customizing hormone therapies, libido enhancers, or vaginal lubricants, this behind-the-scenes conversation reveals the creativity, science, and care that goes into every custom prescription.I would love to hear your feedback about today's episode, as well as any questions or topics that you would like addressed in future episodes. Although "Fanmail" doesn't allow for me to respond back directly, I am happy to address any questions in upcoming episodes. Thank you for listening and taking the time to message The PGspot through Fanmail!If you want to learn more about sexual health, sexual dysfunction, or how to improve your sex life, follow me on Instagram at @thepgspot or check out my website at doctorpattyj.com for blogs and resources related to sex positivity and real talk about sexuality.  As as always, stay curious, stay empowered, and stay you.

What happens when one partner wants sex more...or less often than the other? In this episode, we dive into the complex, often unspoken world of sexual desire discrepancy. From common causes and emotional impacts to communication tips and ways to reconnect, we explore how couples can bridge the gap without blame or shame. Whether you're the higher-desire or lower-desire partner, this conversation offers validation, insight, and real strategies for navigating intimacy mismatches. I would love to hear your feedback about today's episode, as well as any questions or topics that you would like addressed in future episodes. Although "Fanmail" doesn't allow for me to respond back directly, I am happy to address any questions in upcoming episodes. Thank you for listening and taking the time to message The PGspot through Fanmail!If you want to learn more about sexual health, sexual dysfunction, or how to improve your sex life, follow me on Instagram at @thepgspot or check out my website at doctorpattyj.com for blogs and resources related to sex positivity and real talk about sexuality.  As as always, stay curious, stay empowered, and stay you.

Talking about sex with your partner doesn’t have to be awkward, it can actually bring you closer. In this episode, we dive into why open, honest conversations about sex are essential for a healthy relationship. From navigating desires and boundaries to building trust and deeper intimacy, we’re breaking down how to communicate with confidence (and maybe even have a little fun doing it). Let’s normalize the talk that leads to better connection, in and out of the bedroom. I would love to hear your feedback about today's episode, as well as any questions or topics that you would like addressed in future episodes. Although "Fanmail" doesn't allow for me to respond back directly, I am happy to address any questions in upcoming episodes. Thank you for listening and taking the time to message The PGspot through Fanmail!If you want to learn more about sexual health, sexual dysfunction, or how to improve your sex life, follow me on Instagram at @thepgspot or check out my website at doctorpattyj.com for blogs and resources related to sex positivity and real talk about sexuality.  As as always, stay curious, stay empowered, and stay you.

In this episode, we'll explore the physical, emotional, and psychological layers of this experience, bust some harmful myths, and talk about how to start advocating for your body and pleasure.  Whether you're personally impacted or supporting someone who is, you'll walk away from this episode with insight, validation, and real tools for healing. Let's get into it!Some resources that are mentioned in today's episode include:International Pelvic Pain Society - IPPS - https://www.pelvicpain.orgInternational Society for the Study of Women's Sexual Health - ISSWSH - https://www/isswsh.orgHerman & Wallace Pelvic Rehabilitation - https://hermanwallace.comAmerican Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists - AASECT - https://www.aasect.orgBooks:  Come As You Are - by Emily NagoskiYou Are Not Broken - by Dr. Kelly CaspersonSex Without Pain - by Heather JeffcoatHealing Painful Sex - by Dr. Deborah Coady and Nancy FishPure - by Linda Kay Klein I would love to hear your feedback about today's episode, as well as any questions or topics that you would like addressed in future episodes. Although "Fanmail" doesn't allow for me to respond back directly, I am happy to address any questions in upcoming episodes. Thank you for listening and taking the time to message The PGspot through Fanmail!If you want to learn more about sexual health, sexual dysfunction, or how to improve your sex life, follow me on Instagram at @thepgspot or check out my website at doctorpattyj.com for blogs and resources related to sex positivity and real talk about sexuality.  As as always, stay curious, stay empowered, and stay you.

In this episode, we explore the groundbreaking work of sexologist Miss Jaiya and her Erotic Blueprint framework—a system that helps individuals and couples better understand their unique pathways to arousal, intimacy, and sexual fulfillment. We break down the five Erotic Blueprints—Energetic, Sensual, Sexual, Kinky, and Shapeshifter—and discuss how each one offers insights into your core desires, turn-ons, and potential blocks to pleasure. Whether you’re looking to deepen your connection with a partner or better understand your own erotic identity, this episode offers a judgment-free space to learn, reflect, and reimagine your relationship to pleasure. Tune in for a conversation that’s as informative as it is empowering.I would love to hear your feedback about today's episode, as well as any questions or topics that you would like addressed in future episodes. Although "Fanmail" doesn't allow for me to respond back directly, I am happy to address any questions in upcoming episodes. Thank you for listening and taking the time to message The PGspot through Fanmail!If you want to learn more about sexual health, sexual dysfunction, or how to improve your sex life, follow me on Instagram at @thepgspot or check out my website at doctorpattyj.com for blogs and resources related to sex positivity and real talk about sexuality.  As as always, stay curious, stay empowered, and stay you.

In this powerful episode, we journey through the rich and resilient history of Pride; from its radical roots in protest and resistance to its evolution into a global celebration of identity, love, and progress. We explore key moments in LGBTQ+ history, the struggles and triumphs that have shaped the movement, and the legacy of those who fought for the rights many enjoy today. But the story doesn’t end there. As we examine how past victories have influenced modern society, we also confront the ongoing challenges the LGBTQ+ community faces and why continued advocacy, allyship, and awareness are more important than ever. Join us as we honor the past, celebrate the present, and look toward a future where Pride is not just a moment, it's a movement. I would love to hear your feedback about today's episode, as well as any questions or topics that you would like addressed in future episodes. Although "Fanmail" doesn't allow for me to respond back directly, I am happy to address any questions in upcoming episodes. Thank you for listening and taking the time to message The PGspot through Fanmail!If you want to learn more about sexual health, sexual dysfunction, or how to improve your sex life, follow me on Instagram at @thepgspot or check out my website at doctorpattyj.com for blogs and resources related to sex positivity and real talk about sexuality.  As as always, stay curious, stay empowered, and stay you.

What happens when partners experience mismatched desire—or when sex starts to feel like just another item on the to-do list? In this insightful episode, I’m joined by Dr. Maureen Ryan, a sexual health counselor, nurse practitioner, and nationally certified health coach, to unpack some common yet often unspoken issues in relationships.  We explore how couples can navigate different levels of sexual interest, the importance of prioritizing intimacy in busy lives, and how mindfulness and being truly present can enhance sexual function and connection. Dr. Ryan offers practical strategies, thoughtful perspective, and a compassionate voice that helps normalize the ebbs and flows of desire.Whether you're in a long-term relationship or on a personal journey toward better sexual wellness, this conversation will leave you with tools to reconnect—with yourself and your partner.I would love to hear your feedback about today's episode, as well as any questions or topics that you would like addressed in future episodes. Although "Fanmail" doesn't allow for me to respond back directly, I am happy to address any questions in upcoming episodes. Thank you for listening and taking the time to message The PGspot through Fanmail!If you want to learn more about sexual health, sexual dysfunction, or how to improve your sex life, follow me on Instagram at @thepgspot or check out my website at doctorpattyj.com for blogs and resources related to sex positivity and real talk about sexuality.  As as always, stay curious, stay empowered, and stay you.

In this special Masturbation May episode, we journey through the rich (and often misunderstood) history of self-pleasure.  From historical attitudes toward erotic autonomy to the invention of the first vibrator, we explore how solo sex has evolved - and how it's been shaped by science, stigma, and shifting societal norms. We'll examine the lasting impact of Puritanical values on modern views of masturbation, and take a comparative look at how different cultures around the world understand and engage with self-pleasure.  It's time to challenge shame, reclaim pleasure, and recognize masturbation as a vital part of human sexuality and wellness. I would love to hear your feedback about today's episode, as well as any questions or topics that you would like addressed in future episodes. Although "Fanmail" doesn't allow for me to respond back directly, I am happy to address any questions in upcoming episodes. Thank you for listening and taking the time to message The PGspot through Fanmail!If you want to learn more about sexual health, sexual dysfunction, or how to improve your sex life, follow me on Instagram at @thepgspot or check out my website at doctorpattyj.com for blogs and resources related to sex positivity and real talk about sexuality.  As as always, stay curious, stay empowered, and stay you.

For most vulva owners, sexual pleasure isn't just about penis in vagina sex.  In this episode, we will discuss the multitude of erogenous zones and how they were discovered.  So, whether you’re looking to level up your solo game, spark new things with a partner, or just get to know your body better, it’s time to unlock the whole pleasure spectrum -one spot at a time. I would love to hear your feedback about today's episode, as well as any questions or topics that you would like addressed in future episodes. Although "Fanmail" doesn't allow for me to respond back directly, I am happy to address any questions in upcoming episodes. Thank you for listening and taking the time to message The PGspot through Fanmail!If you want to learn more about sexual health, sexual dysfunction, or how to improve your sex life, follow me on Instagram at @thepgspot or check out my website at doctorpattyj.com for blogs and resources related to sex positivity and real talk about sexuality.  As as always, stay curious, stay empowered, and stay you.

In this episode, I would like to introduce myself and explain how I got where I am in both my career and my journey in sexual health.  Join me as I discuss my background, experience and what inspired me to specialize in female sexual dysfunction.  I would love to hear your feedback about today's episode, as well as any questions or topics that you would like addressed in future episodes. Although "Fanmail" doesn't allow for me to respond back directly, I am happy to address any questions in upcoming episodes. Thank you for listening and taking the time to message The PGspot through Fanmail!If you want to learn more about sexual health, sexual dysfunction, or how to improve your sex life, follow me on Instagram at @thepgspot or check out my website at doctorpattyj.com for blogs and resources related to sex positivity and real talk about sexuality.  As as always, stay curious, stay empowered, and stay you.

I would love to hear your feedback about today's episode, as well as any questions or topics that you would like addressed in future episodes. Although "Fanmail" doesn't allow for me to respond back directly, I am happy to address any questions in upcoming episodes. Thank you for listening and taking the time to message The PGspot through Fanmail!If you want to learn more about sexual health, sexual dysfunction, or how to improve your sex life, follow me on Instagram at @thepgspot or check out my website at doctorpattyj.com for blogs and resources related to sex positivity and real talk about sexuality.  As as always, stay curious, stay empowered, and stay you.