The UnlearnT Podcast

Send us Fan MailWe use Hitch to talk about what it really means to be grounded in who you are when life shifts, relationships get messy, and old wounds start writing new rules. The thread running through everything is simple: freedom grows where authenticity, truth, and real community replace performance and self-protection. • Hitch as a case study in identity, confidence, and romantic connection • The difference between social skill and manipulation • Building a permanent philosophy on a temporary hurt • How walls can protect us from what we want most • Vulnerability as risk, safety, and relational trust • Intellectualizing emotions instead of sharing them • Words shaping worlds and revealing what is truly in us • AI companionship, mirrored reality, and the danger of isolation • Why truth outside ourselves matters for mental and spiritual health • The church as a community builder in everyday life • Mentorship that pulls out what’s already in someone • Albert’s hopefulness as the antidote to Hitch’s strategy hey like share subscribe if you uh found this to be of any value to you pass it on to your community feel free to follow us on Facebook and Instagram and to let us know what you think 

Send us Fan MailWe revisit Best Man Holiday and use it to get honest about betrayal, friendship repair, and what it really takes to build community after years of silence. We dig into self-awareness, boundaries, and communication, then ask what freedom looks like when you stop rewriting the story and start telling the truth. • the Summer Movie Series and why sequels usually fail • Harper’s book betrayal and the lasting cost of “fiction” • forgiveness versus restoration and why scapegoating blocks healing • Mia as the catalyst who forces truth and reconnection • Q as the truth teller and why consistent self-awareness matters • past mistakes resurfacing and how poor communication escalates drama • marriage boundaries including intimacy with friends and public respect for your spouse • leadership visibility and the need to stay grounded with people who truly know you Like, share, subscribe, make a comment, let us know that you’re out there. Let’s keep growing the community. Feel free to follow us on Facebook and Instagram and to let us know what you think. 

Send us Fan MailWe use Mulan as a lens for identity, leadership, and what it costs to grow into who we really are when the people closest to us expect someone else. We pull out the lessons hiding in the matchmaker scene, the training ground, and the palace to challenge old systems and build the courage to show up authentic. • Mulan as a story for people who never “fit” • the matchmaker scene as an identity and expectation trap • choosing environments that match your purpose • naming the tension between rebellion and reformation • learning to navigate systems before trying to change them • preparation seasons that make sense later • the switch from training to real battle • mentors who make mistakes and still matter • risky decisions without guaranteed outcomes • “buried but not killed” problems returning stronger • rejection building confidence to keep showing up Like, share, subscribe, be part of the community. Feel free to follow us on Facebook and Instagram and to let us know what you think. 

Send us Fan MailWe rewatch The Temptations miniseries and pull out the leadership, faith, and real-life lessons hiding inside a classic story about talent, brotherhood, and fame. We wrestle with what it costs to build a legacy and how unhealed wounds, weak boundaries, and bad management can dismantle what gift alone can’t sustain. • summer movie series framing and why rewatches hit harder as adults • Temptations vs Five Heartbeats nostalgia and what each story represents • the hidden cost of legacy, brand and success over decades • talent without wisdom, learning the business and becoming a player • manager red flags, control tactics and “you just sing” traps • Otis as organizer, structure builder and conflict manager • Blue as the steady second, foundation voice and pastoral presence • leadership lessons from our gospel choir years, delegation and role clarity • overmanaging people, recognizing gifts that don’t look like ours • David Ruffin as a cautionary tale, when talent outruns character • Paul’s alcoholism and knowing your manual, spiritual and practical boundaries • Josephine vs Paul’s wife, marriage, danger and independence under pressure • Eddie’s loyalty trap, enabling and fear-based decision making • building something that outlasts people, no one bigger than the group Like, share, subscribe Feel free to follow us on Facebook and Instagram, and to let us know what you think 

Send us Fan MailWe review the newly released "David" movie, and use his long road from shepherd to king to talk about freedom, process, and what it costs to change in middle adulthood. We contrast David’s worship-centered leadership with Saul’s insecurity and isolation so we can spot where our own voices have gotten louder than God’s. • freedom as breaking out of unseen bondage • why “process” matters more as you get older • David being excluded yet still chosen • staying humble when God’s plan interrupts your preferences • Saul’s decline through disobedience and self-protection • the danger of building an echo chamber where only you speak • finding a fresh revelation for each new season and battle • resisting hustle culture and focusing on assignment • accepting that elevation can bring more chaos, not less • keeping trusted community close as influence grows • worship as ongoing connection, not just singing We would love for you to like, share, subscribe. Don’t keep this to yourself. Feel free to follow us on Facebook and Instagram and to let us know what you think. 

Send us Fan MailWe use iRobot to talk about how AI and robots shift from helpful tools into authorities we trust with truth, decisions, and even identity. We challenge ourselves to notice where convenience is quietly replacing discernment, community, and connection to God. • choosing iRobot as a mirror for modern AI ethics and real-world tech culture • outsourcing tasks versus outsourcing the inner work of purpose and identity • why AI tends to agree and how affirmation loops distort truth • Spooner’s crash story as a case study in cold logic versus wisdom • screen-truth culture from encyclopedias to Wikipedia to AI “research” • convenience as a powerful force that can silence the few who see risk • abdication of care when we assume technology will handle it • faith and discernment as a response to technological overreach • Sonny’s “who am I” arc as a picture of human longing for meaning Like, share, subscribe, and comment! We want you to be a part of this community. if this had any value to you at all share it with somebody else don't keep it to yourself! 

Send us Fan MailWe laugh our way through Coming To America while pulling out real lessons about tradition, identity, and what it takes to build a life that actually fits. We talk about self-worth, the environments we choose, and why timing and readiness matter more than pressure and appearances. • why Coming To America still lands as a culture classic and a leadership mirror • tradition versus desire and how “scripts” get passed down • “tradition is peer pressure from dead people” and what to do with that • swinging to extremes when you do not know the middle yet • dating and discernment and why environment matters • getting noticed by staying in your lane and doing your work well • ego checks and humility and paying an entry fee for real access • self-worth and boundaries and what it means to raise the price • keeping the skills from your past instead of rejecting your whole story • mentorship, timing, and refusing to push people to skip steps Hey, like, share, subscribe. Make sure you come part of the community. We love to have you. 

Send us Fan MailWe connect communication to the way people think, feel, and act, then show why relationships break when we assume everyone hears words the same way. We use the Life Languages framework to help you soften impact, build safety, and stop turning differences into disrespect. • communication as understanding people’s perspective, not just saying the right thing • words as output of the mind and why brains shape conversations • intent versus impact and why you manage impact either way • emotional intelligence tiers from self-awareness to social awareness • Life Languages overview from Speaking of Love by Fred and Anna Kendall • emotive languages with responder empathy and influencer energy • cognitive languages with strategist vision, contemplator depth, and giver responsibility • giving people time for their process and creating safe space to talk • kinetic languages with mover urgency and doer steadiness • choosing the right medium for the message and why social media can cheapen communication • appreciating people for what they value so they feel seen please like, share, and subscribe 

Send us Fan MailWe talk about what happens after you finally get the opportunity you prayed for and why the real work starts once you’re inside the door. We break down the mindset shifts that help us lead with humility, learn the culture, and grow into the competencies the next level requires. • the difference between getting in the door and staying in the door • leveling up as an internal process more than an external opportunity • why competencies matter more than resume skill sets • the sponsor vs mentor difference and why you need both • learning and observing a new culture without rushing to critique it • the Johari window, blind spots, and unexpected insecurity at a higher level • building trust across the whole organisation, not just with “leaders” • power analysis, informal influence, and pathways to decision makers • caring for people over tasks as leadership responsibility grows • identifying your Aaron and Hur, plus the support system that keeps you steady If this has helped you and you think it can help somebody else, share it with a friend. Feel free to follow us on Facebook and Instagram and to let us know what you think. 

Send us Fan MailWe use Jill Scott’s decade framework to get honest about what work is supposed to teach us across our 20s, 30s, and the years ahead. We talk burnout, alignment, leadership, and the courage it takes to stop dragging old obligations into a new season. • Jill Scott’s view of decades as a work framework • Working hard in your 20s while avoiding burnout • Misalignment and why passion is not a perfect guide • Learning to give your all even when you dislike tasks • Working smarter through delegation, communication, and discipline • Leading by building people so they can outgrow you • Making career fit inside your life priorities • Entering your 40s with clearer boundaries and focused gifts • Releasing roles and relationships that no longer fit • Courage and intentionality as the real drivers of change • Remembering it is not too late to prepare and pivot If you have heard an interesting quote lately, or if you've heard something that you're like, uh, I really want them to talk about that, send it to us. If this was meaningful for you, share it. Don't keep it to yourself. Like it, you know, subscribe to the channels. Feel free to follow us on Facebook and Instagram and to let us know what you think. 

Send us Fan MailWe get practical about salary negotiation by breaking down how leaders think about budgets, value, and long-term plans, then show how to bring your rare strengths into the interview and the ask. We also zoom out to talk culture, wellness, and faith so you can accept an offer with peace and not just a number. • why most employers already have a number in mind • making a business case by connecting your work to revenue or expenses • showing your rare and valuable thing in the interview • researching the organization’s mission, context, and priorities • listening for what the leader truly values and negotiating to that • staying ahead of change and learning tools as work evolves • negotiating more than salary including time, flexibility, and support • reading culture signals and looking for leadership transparency • using the walk-away option when values do not align Yeah, like, share, subscribe, folks. Like, share, subscribe. Feel free to follow us on Facebook and Instagram and to let us know what you think.

Send us Fan MailWe kick off a Level Up Series for anyone feeling the tension of transition and wanting more freedom through real growth. We talk as leaders and employees about trust, boundaries, blind spots, and the skills that actually prepare you for the next opportunity. • recognising leveling up as daily growth, not just a job change • understanding how employers evaluate trust and potential • choosing the right environment and relationships for development • setting boundaries with supervisors so familiarity does not block promotion • avoiding “proximity without responsibility” and learning from great leaders • staying current with shifting company priorities and strategic goals • refusing offense and rebellion that keeps you stuck • using the Johari Window to name blind spots and accept feedback • building around weaknesses and asking for what you need to be great • turning knowledge into action through consistent follow-through • focusing on rare and valuable skills and letting passion follow competence • rejecting a fixed mindset that says “this is who I am” Listen, if you like what you heard, okay, if it blessed you in any way, would you share with a friend? Would you tell a friend? Would you hit the like button? Would you subscribe and join the family? 

Send us Fan MailWe talk about why comfort is more than a luxury and how it can turn into a survival system that keeps us from growing. We use marriage, leadership, relationships, and real-life seasons of change to push ourselves toward trust, alignment, and the deep end with God. • comfort as insulation built from past pain • the cultural pull toward convenience and how it shapes expectations • why avoiding discomfort can hollow out marriage and maturity • the shallow end versus deep end metaphor for trust • asking whether “lukewarm” is really complacency and misalignment • weariness, burnout, and why deeper can be less work • specializing in the assignment for the current season • delegation and releasing control when capacity shifts • trusting God with people without trying to fix them • alignment checks, people pleasing, and comfort habits that hide loneliness • creating space to hear God, including prayer walks Like, share, and subscribe. Feel free to follow us on Facebook and Instagram, and to let us know what you think. 

Send us Fan MailWe unpack what the “soft life” really means beyond the Instagram snapshot and why culture cannot be the author of our future. We talk alignment, seasons, mentorship, and the kind of foundation that makes abundance sustainable when life stops feeling soft. • the cultural “soft life” image and what it leaves out • defining a personal soft life through values and self-awareness • why authenticity matters more than aesthetics • appreciating steps, seasons, and small upgrades that fit your budget • breaking down barriers like knowledge, access, and systemic hurdles • wisdom sharing versus information sharing and why mentors matter • why you want what you want and how that keeps you steady • time freedom, flexibility, and work alignment as real wealth • why skipping steps backfires and how to build capacity Hey, friend, hey, why don't you take a moment and like, share, and subscribe, okay? We would love to hear your comments and your feedback about the episode. Feel free to follow us on Facebook and Instagram and to let us know what you think. 

Send us Fan MailWe talk about why middle adulthood changes what leadership looks like and why our old sprinting habits leave us tired and stuck. We map a practical pathway from inspiration to real momentum by shifting mindset, taking the first step, then building a repeatable method you can teach to others. • Turning 40 as a signal to prioritize comfort and sustainability • Decentralizing leadership by building systems of support • Defining a leader’s real job as care, accountability, direction, communication, and learning • Redefining momentum beyond productivity and personal hustle • Distinguishing inspiration from motivation and why neither guarantees movement • Naming the mindset beliefs that keep us stuck and tired • Moving before you know the full plan and why the unknown cannot be solved in advance • Using accountability as a hack by telling the person who will be affected • Training for endurance leadership through changing terrain • Finishing, building a method, repeating it, then multiplying it for others Send us a message, reply to the video, and let us know what things have you said that you were inspired to do, motivated to do, but it just never really popped off. Like, share, subscribe, comment. Feel free to follow us on Facebook and Instagram and to let us know what you think.

Send us Fan MailWe talk about why middle adulthood forces change and why unlearning old mindsets creates more freedom and peace. We unpack how relationships and identity get rebuilt when old coping systems can no longer carry the weight of your life. • middle adult transitions and the pressure of unseen struggles • unlearning what used to work when it stops serving us • broken systems built in survival mode and why they crumble later • grief as part of letting go of old versions of ourselves • friendship rhythms changing without anyone being “the bad guy” • why silence kills relationship quality and emotional safety • learning to express needs after being taught not to speak up • measuring relationship quality instead of just longevity • making it through storms and accepting new versions of people • deciding what relationships to fight for and what to release • hang on versus hold on and what mutual support looks like • friendship breakups with Christ-like character and clear boundaries • people pleasing guilt and protecting the refining process Like, share, subscribe. Drop us a comment. 

Send us Fan MailWe talk candidly about leading while single, dating without performance, and building relationships that honor the private self as much as the public role. We share how marriage reshaped leadership boundaries, why fans make poor partners, and how faith and community hold us together.• single in leadership and the public vs private self• moving from performance to purpose in dating• authenticity over packaging when seeking a partner• choosing someone who fits at home first• trusting partners with the messy and unpolished parts• avoiding relationships built on admiration of the persona• alone vs lonely and building true community• faith as an anchor against romantic idolatry• healthy boundaries that protect home and work• putting the whole self into the life blueprintLike, share, and subscribe, folks. We want you to be a part of this community, don’t keep it to yourself

Send us Fan MailWe map real leadership styles onto real relationships, from first dates to family life, and show how to keep strengths from turning into blind spots. We trade hype for honesty, outlining how service, vision, collaboration, and adaptability actually feel day to day.• democratic and servant styles showing up on dates • collaboration that lands decisions not delays them • difference between serving in love and people-pleasing • transformational vision versus red flags and reality • situational agility balanced with the power of routine • self-awareness tools to pace access and name needs • how upbringing shapes comfort with being served • practical examples from marriage and co-parentingLike, share, subscribe. We want you to be a part of this community. We want to unlearn with you, we want to get free with you. Come on.

Send us Fan MailWe unpack how single leaders can stop pausing life for marriage, ditch social media comparison, and embrace vulnerability and contentment now. We share money truths, healing tools, and stories that free us from performing a smaller self.• calling out highlight reels and faux honesty online• defining motives: celebration vs proving• replacing comparison with contentment practices• living now instead of waiting for a partner• money myths about two incomes and lifestyle• doing growth for self, not for eligibility• avoiding spiteful independence energy• attracting reality, not counterfeits• vulnerability reps in friendships and community• naming tools for triggers and ongoing healing• embracing complexity instead of palatability• leader power dynamics vs intimacy at homePlease like, share, and subscribeLet us know it’s realPass it on—don’t let it stay on your phoneFollow us on Facebook and Instagram and let us know what you think

Send us Fan MailWe share how choosing a partner as a leader starts with self-knowledge, honest community, and shrinking the list to core values. Ruth Abigail walks through leaving a Velcro situationship, reframing online dating, and finding a partner who frees her to lead.• priorities in early 30s: debt freedom, home buying, career growth• writing and community work building emotional clarity• rethinking online dating as a tool for conversation• how community ends unhealthy attachments• COVID capacity exposing misfit relationships• protecting leadership identity inside romance• authenticity on apps and whole-self profiles• non-impressed confidence as a green flag• direction vs pace: initiative with discernment• stop measuring partners against internet formulas• core values over changeable traits• private-life fit over public image• mutual growth, humility, and teachability• everyday signals of freedom to leadLike the post, share it with a friend, and subscribe. Join the fam. Get in on the movement. Like, share, subscribe.

Send us Fan MailWe question why middle adulthood feels less free and unlearn the idea that single leaders must prove worth through nonstop achievement. We reframe purpose from output to identity, practice shared leadership, and learn to pray like children who bring God everything without polish.• the tension between family-first culture and constant achievement• overworking as a single leader and “mothering” projects• rebuilding systems that don’t depend on one person• making home a place you love to return to• roles beyond your job and auditing relational health• prayer-shaped priorities and saying no with clarity• God as promise, not marriage as guarantee• slowing to the season’s “speed limit” to avoid burnout• praying like a child and finding peace as a compass• shared leadership for sustainable impactPlease like, share, and subscribe. Share this with somebody else. Do not keep it to yourself.

Send us Fan MailWe dig into the rhythms of rest for single leaders, why “always on” culture masks pride and fear, and how Sabbath realigns identity from performance to presence. We name escapism and avoidance, and we offer practices and people that help you take the cape off.• why rest is a command and a gift• the loneliness and pressure of single leadership• unlearning work-first discipleship in church spaces• practicing humility, trust, and partnership with God• rest vs escapism vs avoidance explained• anxiety, health signals, and nervous system care• how to find friends who can hold your “I’m tired”• simple Sabbath practices you can start todayShare it with a friend. Share it with somebody you know. They probably need it as much as you do. 

Send us Fan MailA faith-filled love story moves from a college class pairing to a covenant tested by recession, a house fire, and an autism diagnosis, and rises into purpose as two attorneys build a family and a firm rooted in prayer. We close our season with gratitude, hard-won clarity, and a living template for a second act.• God as matchmaker guiding a campus connection into covenant• “Jesus dating” and boundaries that built trust• Proposal before dating and why care proved commitment• Law school grind, early marriage, first pregnancy• Recession, bar exam delays, and choosing family first• House fire and autism diagnosis reframing their script• Language, prayer, and practical teaching unlocking breakthroughs• Maya’s prophetic moments and the arrival of twins• Home as sanctuary and kids leading in faith• Career redemption, multi-state licensure, and launching the firm• Marriage as mutual service and daily anticipation• Gratitude as the posture of the second actThank you for like, sharing, and subscribeGo ahead, babe. We are located at 810 Dutch Square Boulevard, suite 206, Columbia, South Carolina, 29210. Our office number is 803-339-1661. Our website is www.smallfirmsc.com

Send us Fan MailWe map the journey from porch rules and legacy expectations to a crash that rewrote the plan, then to a comeback that finished the old vision and opened a bigger calling. Faith reframes pressure as privilege, and mentorship becomes a lifelong vow to build others.• growing up third in a namesake line and guarded by a praying grandmother• crossing the tracks into private school and learning new literacies• leadership formed in the classroom before dominance on the field• national recruiting and the weight of communal expectation• the hydroplane crash, neck fusion, and God’s waiting room• TDC method for transition: time, distance, covering• fatherhood, coaching, and a purpose-built comeback at Boston College• choosing family over fantasy during COVID-era setbacks• recommitting to Christ and stepping into scholarship and teaching• mentorship as a lifelong commitment, not a feel-good projectPlease like, share, subscribe. We want you to be a part of the family. We want you to continue to learn more as we continue to unlearn. We want you to join us on this journey of unlearning.

Send us Fan MailWe trace Mikayla’s journey from crowns and depression to surrender, purpose and a swift second act marked by peace, service and marriage. A locked door opens, a pill bottle vanishes and a new life begins as we unpack belonging, exposure and the power of a full yes to God.• small-town accolades masking depression and emptiness• the search for mattering versus popularity• a suicide attempt interrupted and preserved life• new age detours and pandemic exposure• hard truths from family and the cost of avoidance• return to South Carolina and friction that refined• Word Wednesdays and the mirror of reflection• clearing house: habits, décor, affiliations, identity• servant leadership as preparation for marriage• rest in Jesus over hustle and self-definition• launching What the Mirror Found on SubstackLike, share and subscribe because God is truly doing something really, really amazing. Don’t be afraid to become a part of the community. Don’t be afraid to reach out, talk to us. We want to engage with you in the comments.

Send us Fan MailWe trace Catina Parrish Clark’s journey from insurance to education to chaplaincy and pastoring, exploring how obedience, formation, and care shape a faithful second act. We share honest lessons on leaving the familiar, guarding your soul, and leading from presence with people.• salary cap and tuition as guidance signals• discovering a teaching gift and learning God’s voice• saying yes when comfort says stay• moving churches to grow spiritually• divinity school refining language of faith• chaplaincy as the heart of pastoral care• staying with people to fuel the pulpit• self‑care rhythms that prevent burnout• accepting elevation before feeling ready• practical courage for a second actPlease like, please share, please subscribe. If you’re new to the community, please say hello. We love interacting and engaging with you in the comments

Send us Fan Mail

Send us Fan Mail

Send us Fan MailWe go live to name the weight of leading through hard seasons and offer practical ways to endure with hope, clarity, and integrity. We unpack how to recover from mistakes faster, re-categorize relationships, and reinvest in the vision without burning out.• defining enduring leadership and long faith• guarding inputs, language and circles• year‑end discouragement and resetting hope• crew checks and relationship categories• expectations based on evidence not desire• mistakes, restitution and shorter recovery• weights to lay aside versus sins to repent• hard truths leaders must accept• reinvesting, pivoting and finding the tipping point• leading people versus managing projectsIf you thought this live was worth anything, share it with somebody else. Like, share, subscribe to the podcast, join the community

Send us Fan MailRuth and Jaquetta dive into the cult classic "Love & Basketball" as they kick off their summer series examining movies they had to unlearn from, breaking down the film's problematic messages about relationships, identity, and success.• Analyzing the movie in quarters, just like the film's structure• Unlearning identity limitations - you don't have to choose between femininity and athleticism• Character development matters more than talent when pursuing dreams• Leaders look past gifts to character - "if your mentor don't get on your nerves, you ain't got a good mentor"• Relationships rarely stay the way they started, and transitions require communication• Soul ties keep you stuck - "reaching back to get something will always pull you backwards"• The unrealistic portrayal of Monica getting Quincy back by playing for his heart two weeks before his wedding• How aesthetics in the film reinforce gender expectations and identity shiftsLike, share, and subscribe to join our community! We want to hear your thoughts about Love & Basketball in the comments.

Send us Fan MailWe explore situational leadership with clear lines between crisis control and season-long guidance, naming the hero trap, burnout, and how to build trust, culture, and vision by developing people. Practical tools include better questions, motivation cues, and when to let safe balls drop.• definition of situational leadership and core traits• when authoritarian direction fits emergencies• risks to trust, culture and long-term vision• burnout and the hero trap of constant rescuing• delegating authority vs over-supporting tasks• reading individual motivation and wiring• ask what and how instead of do and have• judging character fairly vs mirroring yourself• safe arenas for failure, feedback and growth• achievers stepping back, mission-minded stepping forwardListen, friends, you're gonna come in and you're gonna join the community, okay? Hit the heart. Please like, share, and for sure subscribe. If you share, tag us in it.

Send us Fan MailWe unpack transformational leadership through real stories, moving from identity and belief to sustainable action. We name the strengths, blind spots, and boundaries that keep charisma ethical and growth-centered.• defining transformational leadership and its core pillars• coaching belief before behavior using the be do have model• individualized consideration and long-term loyalty• where this style fails in crisis and how to pivot• boundaries to avoid favorites and blurred roles• mission focus over ego and preference• ethical voice use, speaking last, and avoiding manipulation• sharing influence with other leaders and building community• releasing people well and holding allegiance loosely• practical tips to balance inspiration with structureLike, share, subscribe, and become part of this community

Send us Fan MailWe unpack transactional leadership—why it feels natural, where it works, and when it fails—and show how to pair it with relational styles so people and performance both thrive. Clear goals help, but autonomy, mastery, and purpose keep teams engaged and growing.• definition of transactional leadership and its roots in school rewards• where transactional systems fit: scale, sustaining growth, clear metrics• strengths: clarity, consistency, fast runway for new hires• weaknesses: micromanagement, pressure, shallow incentives• autonomy, mastery, purpose as durable motivators• pairing transactional with servant, transformational, and democratic styles• co‑creating goals versus top‑down mandates• producer‑to‑leader shift and ambition with boundaries• organization‑first vs team‑first bias and how to balance• whole‑self leadership and avoiding the pizza‑party trapWe want you to like, share, and subscribe, okay? Become a part of the community, you know. Unlearn with us… Share and subscribe. If you like the clip, like the clip. Hit the like button.

Send us Fan MailWe rethink servant leadership, tracing how values shape style, when closeness empowers, and where boundaries keep service from becoming control. We compare servant and transformational modes, test historical examples, and offer practical pivots for sustainable leadership.• values driving leadership styles and choices• definition and core traits of servant leadership• inspire versus motivate as a practical distinction• where servant leadership fits best on a team’s journey• referral, boundaries and network support to prevent dependence• middle management as the bridge for people and mission• MLK and Jesus as lenses for public versus close leadership• shadow side of glorified burnout and subtle power• safeguards: accountability, community, healthy outlets, release plans• practical pivots to democratic or directive styles when neededLike, share, and subscribe to the Unlearnt Podcast. Become part of this Unlearnt community. We want to hear what you’re unlearning from leadership and how this is impacting you

Send us Fan Mail

Send us Fan MailThe autocratic leadership style, often misunderstood but sometimes necessary, provides clear command and control when building something new or navigating through crisis.• Autocratic leadership is marked by a self-appointed, self-governing style where the leader maintains full control• This leadership style produces explosive results when there's no time for democratic process• Steve Jobs exemplifies a successful autocratic leader who maintained high standards while revolutionizing technology• Autocratic leaders are typically highly skilled, influential, and charismatic individuals who inspire others to follow their vision• Understanding the three types of leaders—builders, optimizers, and fixers—helps autocratic leaders know when to pivot• Autocratic leaders must learn to transition from doing everything themselves to documenting processes and empowering others• The apostle Paul demonstrates how autocratic leaders can pivot to coaching roles rather than maintaining constant control• Partnerships between visionaries and optimizers create sustainable organizations• Distinguishing between vision (what's essential) and preference (what's personal) allows autocratic leaders to let go appropriately• Self-awareness and recognizing the current needs of your organization are crucial for effective leadershipLike, share, and subscribe to build our community! Tell a friend to tell a friend about these critical conversations that can help you gain the courage to change your mind and experience more freedom.

Send us Fan MailWe explore the democratic leadership style, examining when this collaborative approach works best and when leaders need to pivot to different styles for effective team management.• Democratic leadership involves consulting with team members and valuing collaboration• This leadership style works best with highly skilled, experienced team members• Leaders must properly prepare teams with information, vision, and context before expecting meaningful input• Nelson Mandela and Martin Luther King Jr. exemplified democratic leadership in building consensus• Democratic leadership isn't about being liked – it's about effectively developing your team• Ambitious leaders often move too quickly, failing to adequately prepare teams for shared decision-making• Not every situation requires consensus – leaders must discern when to make executive decisions• Leaders should know their natural style but be flexible enough to adapt when circumstances require• Democratic leadership requires ongoing coaching and development, not just collecting input• Middle adults must evaluate if their leadership style matches their team's readiness and the situation at handPlease like, share and subscribe to the Unlearned Podcast! Engage with us in the comments and follow us on Facebook and Instagram.

Send us Fan MailJaquetta Ross joins us to debunk common misconceptions about Generation Z in the workplace and shares insights from her 12 years of working with this young adult population.• Gen Z is often mischaracterized as entitled, naive, and lacking work ethic when they actually crave mentorship and genuine connection• They're exceptionally good at recognizing authenticity and will respond to leaders who are real with them• Many Gen Z behaviors stem from watching older generations be "fake and miserable" in professional settings• Building relationship before offering criticism is essential - you must earn the right to be heard• Gen Z needs emotionally mature leaders who are as invested in their success as their own• Their sensitivity often comes from questions about belonging rather than inability to handle feedback• They bring unmatched creativity, sincere commitment, and willingness to challenge outdated systems• Once they find their purpose, they "lock in" and hold everyone accountable to standards• To lead Gen Z effectively: be straightforward, don't pander, build security within yourself, and be genuineJoin us for our upcoming series on leadership types where we'll help you identify your particular leadership style.

Send us Fan MailIn this candid conversation, host Ruth Abigail speaks with Taniya Adams, a college student she has known since third grade, about the unique challenges and perspectives of Generation Z.• Finding identity amidst social media's influence and the pressure to know your purpose early• Learning it's "okay to be not normal" and breaking free from the exhaustion of trying to fit in• The reality of cancel culture and how it affects young people's lives• Challenging stereotypes about Gen Z being lazy or always on their phones• The importance of community in developing authentic self-understanding• How older adults can support teenagers by having hard conversations without sugarcoating reality• The disconnect between what high school teaches and what young people need for the "real world"• Why Gen Z's ability to unite around important issues offers hope for the future• Embracing difference: "We're born to be different. You're not supposed to be the same."Don't forget to follow us on Facebook and Instagram to share your thoughts about this episode. We're looking forward to the next time when we are able to unlearn together to move forward towards freedom.

Send us Fan MailIn this candid conversation, Ruth Abigail welcomes back musician Savannah Brister to discuss the realities of Gen Z, information overload, and navigating creative entrepreneurship in today's digital landscape.• How Gen Z is perceived: either as exciting innovators or as the generation that will "take us down"• The overwhelming nature of constant information and how it affects mental health• Breaking free from phone dependency and the benefits of digital boundaries• The extensive behind-the-scenes work that goes into creative success• Understanding the raised "floor" of knowledge that Gen Z begins with• Balancing ambitious career goals with long-term life planning• The importance of letting young people fail as a crucial learning process• How anxiety manifests differently in younger generations due to information overloadCheck out Savannah's music on savannahbrister.com and on all social media platforms - she just dropped a new album!

Send us Fan MailPastor Deon Byers shares his decade of experience working with Generation Z, revealing what today's youth truly need from adults and how to build meaningful connections that transform lives.• Mentorship matters – Deon’s own life was transformed by an adult who showed him a world beyond his environment• Today's youth aren't fundamentally different from previous generations, though their challenges are unique• Many young people feel "sacrificed on the altar of success" as parents provide material things but not time or guidance• Building trust requires consistency and authenticity – this generation instantly recognizes and rejects insincerity• Despite stereotypes, Gen Z hungers for truth and clarity in a world of filtered, curated realities• Effective mentoring requires patience, relatable communication, and willingness to "thrive in the trenches"• Remembering names and learning youth culture creates meaningful connections• The boldness characteristic of this generation can be positively channeled when properly cultivated• Don't be discouraged by negative media portrayals – many young people are doing remarkable things

Send us Fan MailWorship leader Darnell Moore unpacks the tension between following industry strategies and Spirit-led ministry in gospel music and church leadership.• The challenge of creating sustainable ministry while remaining faithful to God's leading• Using the metaphor of an exercise ball versus a lazy boy recliner to illustrate the tension between stability and Spirit-led flexibility• What happens when God asks us to abandon proven strategies and follow His unexpected leading• The dangers of discussing spiritual matters without context in today's social media environment• Learning from King David's example of pointing people to God rather than building personal platforms• The warning signs of measuring ministry success by followers, finances, and influence• How true worship means sacrificing personal gain and pointing people back to God• When God asks us to willingly give back what He first gave usWe're dropping a new series next week—stay tuned as we continue to unlearn together so we can experience more freedom!

Send us Fan MailLink to Darnell’s episode on Unlearning Marriage: https://open.spotify.com/episode/0cRfDyy6EqqfTWewDvXs7Q?si=oOHrilbERvqC7KONjgSlEgDarnell Harris joins us for a special conversation about the tension between industry success and spiritual authenticity in worship leadership.• The episode was prompted by a controversial podcast featuring Norman from Tribl Records discussing his industry-focused approach with Maverick City Music• Darnell shares concerns about worship leaders feeling their ministry isn't valuable if it doesn't bring headlines, Grammys, or viral moments• The crucial question: are you being led by the Lord or by the marketplace?• Understanding the difference between what is "good" and what is "God"• King David's story illustrates the danger of adopting methods that work but aren't God's prescribed way• True success comes from obedience to God, not metrics, likes, or streams• Worship must be formed in everything you do, not just when you're on stage• The challenge of maintaining spiritual discernment in a social media-saturated culture  If you enjoyed part one of this conversation, tune in next week for the conclusion of this two-part series. Continue to like, share, and subscribe so we can grow this unlearning community together.

Send us Fan MailWe examine leadership through the lens of the 1989 film "Lean On Me," exploring how different organizational phases require different leadership styles and what makes a leader effective in each one.• Different organizational phases (startup, turnaround, realignment, acceleration, sustaining success) require different leadership approaches• Joe Clark's authoritarian style was necessary during crisis but needed evolution as the school improved• Bold decisions are required in turnaround situations without time for consensus-building• Leaders must discern when external forces are working to pull them off mission• Sustaining success requires building culture and systems that outlast any single leader• The importance of professional relationships that challenge and sharpen leadership• Community should push you into your moment, not keep you comfortable• Shared leadership becomes essential as organizations move from crisis to stability• Leadership must evolve as the organization evolvesSubscribe, comment, download, and share this podcast to become part of our community of growth-oriented leaders who are committed to unlearning limiting beliefs to experience more freedom.

Send us Fan MailWe must learn to recognize how environments change us and evaluate whether our transformations align with our true selves. The journey of Andy in The Devil Wears Prada illustrates the tension between ambition and purpose.• Ambition has a shadow side that can reveal unexpected aspects of ourselves• The tradeoffs required when trying to "have it all" necessitate hard choices• Transformational relationships often come from seeing leaders behind the scenes• Watch the people you spend the most time with—you'll become more like them• Middle managers need to stop trying to impress and start developing others• Adding value comes from knowledge and communication, not just doing more• Maintain activities that keep you grounded through periods of transformation• Your values must remain consistent even as you grow and evolveJoin the Unlearned family by liking, subscribing, and sharing. We have more movies in our summer series coming up and would love to hear which films shaped your worldview.

Send us Fan MailDrumline offers powerful leadership lessons through the journey of three key characters navigating conflict and change within a college marching band.• Dr. Lee represents tradition and structure, struggling to adapt to changing times while maintaining excellence• Sean demonstrates how middle-management leadership requires overcoming insecurity to develop talent rather than controlling it• Devin embodies raw talent that must learn discipline and structure to reach its potential• Talent alone gets you noticed, but consistent development and learning are essential for sustainable success• True leadership means creating opportunities for others to shine rather than seeking validation from those you lead• Leadership transitions require both honoring established foundations and making space for innovation• The principle of "one band, one sound" shows how individual excellence must be balanced with team cohesion• Conflict can be transformative when it forces leaders to grow and adapt their methodsShare this episode with a friend or colleague who could use some encouragement and leadership inspiration in their life!

Send us Fan MailWe explore leadership lessons from Pixar's Toy Story in this episode of our Summer Movies series, examining how disruption and change affect team dynamics and leadership development.• Teams typically go through four developmental stages: forming, storming, norming, and performing• Disruption (like Buzz arriving) moves teams from norming back to storming - a necessary part of growth• Leaders must avoid seeing talented newcomers as threats rather than assets• The developmental leader framework shows four stages: enthusiastic beginner, disillusioned learner, capable but cautious performer, and self-reliant achiever• Leadership development is cyclical - we go through these stages repeatedly with different skills and challenges• Middle adults should consider if they've neglected personal growth while focusing on career development• Being willing to become a beginner again in some area of life can foster growth and joy• True leadership influence comes when focused on building others up, not just delivering "truth"• The journey from potential to greatness often leads back to potential in new areasLike, share, and subscribe to be part of our community and invite others who are growth-minded leaders seeking more freedom in their lives and leadership.

Send us Fan MailWe examine the six Infinity Stones from Marvel's Avengers: Infinity War and extract powerful leadership lessons from each one that can help us become more effective, balanced leaders.• The Power Stone demonstrates the difference between personality-driven leadership and team-centered leadership• The Space Stone warns against taking up too much room in your organization out of insecurity rather than necessity• The Reality Stone reveals how we must distinguish between changing realities and unchangeable truths in our leadership• The Soul Stone challenges us to define our purpose beyond our position, considering all the relationships we impact• The Time Stone teaches intentionality with our most valuable resource, showing how leaders must forecast and prioritize• The Mind Stone illustrates the critical balance between knowledge and wisdom, especially in an AI-driven worldShare these episodes with your people and let us know what you think. We want you to be part of this community as we continue to grow a community of unlearners who want to gain the courage to change their minds so they can experience more freedom.

Send us Fan MailWe explore leadership lessons from Disney's The Lion King, examining how this iconic film portrays the journey from youth to mature leadership through Simba's story.• The Circle of Life establishes leadership as a circle, not a ladder – emphasizing contribution over position• Young Simba focuses on benefits of kingship without understanding responsibilities, similar to how young leaders approach new positions• Confidence without competence leads to poor decisions, as shown in Simba's dangerous adventures• Scar's "Be Prepared" leadership appeals to dissatisfaction rather than inspiring improvement• Running from responsibility (Hakuna Matata) might feel like paradise but keeps us from our true purpose• True leadership requires accepting both the glory and the weight of responsibility• Our identity and leadership formation are shaped by who we allow to speak into our lives• Sometimes we operate in our gifts (being a lion) while avoiding our assignment (being king)Share with a friend and follow us on Facebook and Instagram. We're looking forward to the next time when we are able to unlearn together to move forward towards freedom.

Send us Fan MailThe Remember the Titans episode explores leadership themes, racial tensions, and community transformation through the lens of this iconic sports movie featuring Denzel Washington.• Sports movies powerfully utilize the underdog narrative to touch on deeper social issues• Coach Boone and Coach Yost represent different leadership styles—visionary versus pastoral• Leaders can't divorce their identity from their leadership style and effectiveness• Breaking down barriers between players required confronting historical roots of conflict• True friendships develop when people allow themselves to be influenced before influencing others• Winning created momentum that helped transform community attitudes about integration• The true test of change came when the community united during moments of tragedy• Changing systems requires first changing people—but not everyone, just the right people• Your personal story can impact community transformation beyond your individual narrativeShare this episode, like, and subscribe to the UnlearnT Podcast! Come join our unlearning space as we continue to grow this community.