Twilight Phase

Our very short season of Bree Tanner comes to a close! We mourn Diego, wonder about some of Smeyer's narrative choices (who would we be if we didn't??), catch a glimpse of some faves, and await the second coming of Freaky Fred...We'll be reading MATE by Ali Hazelwood next! Don't miss it.When do YOU think Fred will return? Write to us at [email protected] the Coven! Follow us to catch our updates or subscribe for bonus eps and stickers over at Patreon.com/TwilightPhasePodcast.Please rate, review, and subscribe, and follow us @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

Riley tells some truths and some lies about the Cullens' gross yellow eyes. The newborns have clearly never taken an earth science class and they are big dumb but NOT BREE because she's not like other [girls] newborns. Only one Bree episode left??Write to us at [email protected] the Coven! Follow us to catch our updates or subscribe for bonus eps and stickers over at Patreon.com/TwilightPhasePodcast.Please rate, review, and subscribe, and follow us @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

It's episode two of our read through of THE SHORT SECOND LIFE OF BREE TANNER! It's time for the Volturi to show up and TRUSTTTT....they have practiced their choreo.Write to us at [email protected] the Coven! Follow us to catch our updates or subscribe for bonus eps and stickers over at Patreon.com/TwilightPhasePodcast.Please rate, review, and subscribe, and follow us @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

We’re baaaaaack! And after many requests from y’all, we’re (finally) reading Short Second Life of Bree Tanner! And guys . . . this one has it all: crying prostitutes, zoned-out prostitutes, ANGRY pimps, STREET VIOLENCE, cheeseburgers of pain, and skilzzzzzz. What more could three junkie hoes ask for?Write to us at [email protected] the Coven! Follow us to catch our updates or subscribe for bonus eps and stickers over at Patreon.com/TwilightPhasePodcast.Please rate, review, and subscribe, and follow us @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

Come gossip with us to catch up before our new season starts next month! Dig out your old copy of Bree Tanner and we'll see you soon!Write to us at [email protected] with your fave Olympic sport and/or butts.Join the Coven! Follow us to catch our updates or subscribe for bonus eps and stickers over at Patreon.com/TwilightPhasePodcast.Please rate, review, and subscribe, and follow us @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

FORKS, WASHINGTON. Can you believe it?!Write to us at [email protected] the Coven! Follow us to catch our updates or subscribe for bonus eps and stickers over at Patreon.com/TwilightPhasePodcast.Please rate, review, and subscribe, and follow us @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

Ali Hazelwood put the RIDE into BRIDE with this one folks!! We discuss the final three chapters with our dear friend, special guest, and noted-werewolf f*cker: MOG. We hope this episode will turn you, too, into a knotting evangelist. <3 Write to us at [email protected] the Coven! Follow us to catch our updates or subscribe for bonus eps and stickers over at Patreon.com/TwilightPhasePodcast.Please rate, review, and subscribe, and follow us @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

Y'all, the plot is plotting. Our BAMS were BOOZLED and our FLABBERS were GASTED. Avoid spoilers for the climax (unfortunately no pun intended) by reading ahead (chapters 26-28!). Catch up before the Bride finale with a special guest!Write to us at [email protected] the Coven! Follow us to catch our updates or subscribe for bonus eps and stickers over at Patreon.com/TwilightPhasePodcast.Please rate, review, and subscribe, and follow us @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

Maya: “Maybe trees ruined themselves, you ever think about THAT?”It’s time, folx. The knot is upon us. Where, you may ask? Oh ho, do we have theories, and yes, some of them are arboreal. We read chapters 22-25 of Bride, and things get . . . KNOTTY. Write to us at [email protected] the Coven! Follow us to catch our updates or subscribe for bonus eps and stickers over at Patreon.com/TwilightPhasePodcast.Please rate, review, and subscribe, and follow us @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

We're reading chapters 19-21 of Ali Hazelwood's BRIDE. These chapters contain the trifecta of Melissa's fantasies: near death, bedside attentiveness, and sexy time. Write to us at [email protected] the Coven! Follow us to catch our updates or subscribe for bonus eps and stickers over at Patreon.com/TwilightPhasePodcast.Please rate, review, and subscribe, and follow us @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

In this episode, we recap chapters 15-18 of Ali Hazelwood's BRIDE and uncover something that Twilight NEVERRRR could have done. We also debate the benefits of a little sexy biting now and unrelatedly, we definitely all agree that Maya was RIGHT AFTER ALL. Write to us at [email protected] the Coven! Follow us to catch our updates or subscribe for bonus eps and stickers over at Patreon.com/TwilightPhasePodcast.Please rate, review, and subscribe, and follow us @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

Things are heating up in BRIDE by Ali Hazelwood... or at least, two out of three Twihards agree. Read along with us and let us know who you agree with: chapters 11-14!Write to us at [email protected] the Coven! Follow us to catch our updates or subscribe for bonus eps and stickers over at Patreon.com/TwilightPhasePodcast.Please rate, review, and subscribe, and follow us @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

In this episode, we discuss chapters 7-10 of BRIDE by Ali Hazelwood! Listeners, not to spoil it for you, but Lowe is Edward if he weren't annoying. Also, peanut butter makes a very impactful appearance. Okay, LOVE YOU, ENJOY!! <3 Write to us at [email protected] the Coven! Follow us to catch our updates or subscribe for bonus eps and stickers over at Patreon.com/TwilightPhasePodcast.Please rate, review, and subscribe, and follow us @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

Vampires, werewolves, humans, oh my! Mysteries deepen and fangs come out in our second episode of Ali Hazelwood's BRIDE! (Read along with us: chapter 3-6.) We canknot wait for you to join us as we explore Twilight's spiritual daughter <3Write to us at [email protected] the Coven! Follow us to catch our updates or subscribe for bonus eps and stickers over at Patreon.com/TwilightPhasePodcast.Please rate, review, and subscribe, and follow us @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

WE BACK.But with a Knot-Twilight subject matter?? BLASPHEME!!Don’t worry, we promise it’s still about sexy vampires and werewolves, and we scholarize thru the lens of our sacred text.(Twilight)Read BRIDE by Ali Hazelwood with US, the Twilight Phase ladies. Canknot wait to start this journey with y’all (starting with the prologue through chapter 2)!Write to us at [email protected] the Coven! Follow us to catch our updates or subscribe for bonus eps and stickers over at Patreon.com/TwilightPhasePodcast.Please rate, review, and subscribe, and follow us @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

We pop in to discuss the Twilight outtakes from Auntie Steph's website (prom! extra Alice!) and remind you we'll be back in the new year to read Bride by Ali Hazelwood together, so grab your copy soon! Love ya! Write to us at [email protected]. Join the Coven! Follow us to catch our updates or subscribe for bonus eps and stickers over at Patreon.com/TwilightPhasePodcast. Please rate, review, and subscribe, and follow us @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

Twilight family!! Twihards and Twinards, alike! We interrupt your extremely regular day to bring you long-broken Twilight news! We’re still on our break (sry, back soon), but you KNOW we had Thoughts and Feelings about that animated show announcement. And remember: as long as there be Twilight-related news and updates, there be . . . ~Twilight Phase~~~~ LOVE Y’ALL! Write to us at [email protected]. Please rate, review, and subscribe, and follow us @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

Fam!! We made it!! Here we are at the Epilogue of Twilight (for the second time) and the end of a saga! It's prom night once again, which means Bella's emotional and so are we. Don't worry, this isn't the last you'll hear from from us (obvs! can't get rid of us that easily). Stay tuned for more reviews, more roasts, and more nostalgia. Luv ya forever, The Twilight Phase coven Write to us at [email protected]. Join the Coven! Follow us to catch our updates or subscribe for bonus eps and stickers over at Patreon.com/TwilightPhasePodcast. Please rate, review, and subscribe, and follow us @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

Welcome to chapter 24: An Impasse aka the Official Roast of Melissa. We discuss breaking news from 2016 about Jacksonville, Edward's wet blanket-ness, and how nobody cares about Charlie, we guess! Write to us at [email protected] the Coven! Follow us to catch our updates or subscribe for bonus eps and stickers over at Patreon.com/TwilightPhasePodcast.Please rate, review, and subscribe, and follow us @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

In this episode we review Twilight chapter 23: the Angel! But of course, first we have to do a live pickle unboxing, we play guess the word count, and we also ask ourselves the big question: does Bella have a character arc? Write to us at [email protected]. Join the Coven! Follow us to catch our updates or subscribe for bonus eps and stickers over at Patreon.com/TwilightPhasePodcast. Please rate, review, and subscribe, and follow us @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com Alternative titles we liked but didn't choose--which is your favorite? What Are You Looking At, Ice Spice??? Out Here Looking Like Ice Spice Pickle ASMR Burned Out on Ranch Dressing Taylor Lautner, This One's for You We Have Roast Beef with Jacob Black Mor👏tal 👏 Dan👏ger👏 Only YOU Can Prevent Vampirism Crisis Averted Edward's Climax Please, Stephenie, Can We Have More Crumbs?

The title we almost picked: Bella Would Die For You In this episode, we recount Bella's daring escape, and dare we say it...we owe Stephenie Meyer an apology. Because Alice's visions do kind of make sense in this chapter. Who knew!! We also talk about how sometimes, being ugly is a gift. <3 Not that you listeners would know, because you're all CUTIES! Write to us at [email protected]. Join the Coven! Follow us to catch our updates or subscribe for bonus eps and stickers over at Patreon.com/TwilightPhasePodcast. Please rate, review, and subscribe, and follow us @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

Welcome back, listeners! In this episode, Bella gets a Very Important Phone Call from her mom…or is it? DUN DUN DUN! Write to us at [email protected]. Join the Coven! Follow us to catch our updates or subscribe for bonus eps and stickers over at Patreon.com/TwilightPhasePodcast. Please rate, review, and subscribe, and follow us @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

Welcome back, listeners! It's chapter 20, IMPATIENCE, and we are impatient for this chapter to end. You're in a hotel room, we get it! This episode also comes with a huge SHOCK REVEAL from Olivia (gasp!) Write to us at [email protected]. Join the Coven! Follow us to catch our updates or subscribe for bonus eps and stickers over at Patreon.com/TwilightPhasePodcast. Please rate, review, and subscribe, and follow us @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

We’re in the home stretch, fam!! (Baseball!!) Chapter 16 is a doozy: Charlie gets eviscerated for NO GOOD REASON, Bella earns that Oscar (and Charlie’s tears), and she and Edward kiss right in front of EVERYBODY. It’s getting juicy! Write to us at [email protected]. Join the coven! Follow us to catch our updates or subscribe for bonus eps and stickers over at Patreon.com/TwilightPhasePodcast. Please rate, review, and subscribe, and follow us @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

The plan is apparently "maybe these aggressive vampires just won't smell Bella"???? Good thing our girl has some smart ideas, not to mention narrative agency! Write to us at [email protected]. Join the coven! Follow us to catch our updates or subscribe for bonus eps and stickers over at Patreon.com/TwilightPhasePodcast. Please rate, review, and subscribe, and follow us @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

We missed you, listeners!! What's that we smell? Cinnamon? Edward's weird vampire breath? Nay!! It's plot, at last! In this chapter we discuss Billy's very reasonable attempt to warn Charlie, Edward's sexboozlization of Bella, and an important piece of vampire lore that everyone definitely agrees is true: vampires love baseball. Write to us at [email protected]. Join the coven! Follow us to catch our updates or subscribe for bonus eps and stickers over at Patreon.com/TwilightPhasePodcast. Please rate, review, and subscribe, and follow us @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

We're back again, fam! And this week we're discussing Chapter 16: Carlisle—inarguably the most boring chapter of the whole book. But by golly if we don't do our darndest to make it positively pleasant! Hold on tight, spider monkeys—we're one chapter away from PLOT. Write to us at [email protected]. Join the coven! Follow us to catch our updates or subscribe for bonus eps and stickers over at Patreon.com/TwilightPhasePodcast. Please rate, review, and subscribe, and follow us @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

Hello listeners!! DISCLAIMER: Melissa's audio was ~*~phucked~*~ this entire ep but that's okay because in this ep we dive deep into the omegaverse (google with caution), Edward and Bella's soulmate-level relationship, and the Brady Bunch, OF COURSE. Write to us at [email protected]. Join the coven! Follow us to catch our updates or subscribe for bonus eps and stickers over at Patreon.com/TwilightPhasePodcast. Please rate, review, and subscribe, and follow us @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

Hello, nerds! You guessed it—we're back to talk about Twilight. MORE SPECIFICALLY, Chapter 14. Here's just a ~~smattering of what we discuss in this episode: lasagna and milk (pros/cons of) Edward as an unrepentant stalker (which makes it so chill) lots of touching (BANG BANG!) having a boy in your room (when you're both aware and NOT aware) general canoodling (as it differs from touching) Edward's sexuality (BANG BANG?) Write to us at [email protected]. Join the coven! Follow us to catch our updates or subscribe for bonus eps and stickers over at Patreon.com/TwilightPhasePodcast. Please rate, review, and subscribe, and follow us @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

ALERT ALERT ALERT it's the meadow, folks!!!! Strap in. Write to us at [email protected]. Join the coven! Follow us to catch our updates or subscribe for bonus eps and stickers over at Patreon.com/TwilightPhasePodcast. Please rate, review, and subscribe, and follow us @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

You know it, we know it, Edward knows it--in this chapter, Bella suffers from some MAJOR black and white thinking! We also discuss the importance of allowing your characters to have agency--and even better, FOXES. Write to us at [email protected]. Join the coven! Follow us to catch our updates or subscribe for bonus eps and stickers over at Patreon.com/TwilightPhasePodcast. Please rate, review, and subscribe, and follow us @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

Well, y'all...this week we showed up, made (two-thirds of) an episode...and never hit the little red button. A first! So instead, here is 8 minutes of us apologizing, laughing slightly maniacally, and explaining that we'll be back in mid-February with the episode we tried to make this week. Love ya! In the meantime, write to us at [email protected]. Join the coven! Follow us to catch our updates or subscribe for bonus eps and stickers over at Patreon.com/TwilightPhasePodcast. Please rate, review, and subscribe, and follow us @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

GUYS EDWARD SAYS THE TITLE. TWILIGHT. THE SAFEST TIME OF DAY FOR US. (Plus he like asks a zillion questions or whatever.) Write to us at [email protected]. Join the coven! Follow us to catch our updates or subscribe for bonus eps and stickers over at Patreon.com/TwilightPhasePodcast. Please rate, review, and subscribe, and follow us @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com We love youuuuuuu.

Welcome to chapter 10 of Twilight: INTERROGATIONS. And there's a LOT that we interrogate in this chapter--we continue our deep dive on Bella's deficiencies as a friend, discuss B + E's agreement to SAY that they're secretly dating, and go back and forth on who likes who more. (When obviously, WE love YOU most.) Write to us at [email protected]. Join the coven! Follow us to catch our updates or subscribe for bonus eps and stickers over at Patreon.com/TwilightPhasePodcast. Please rate, review, and subscribe, and follow us @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

What's up listeners!! Happy New Year!! In this episode, we revisit a TRULY ICONIC chapter. Get ready to be transported with us as we discuss that good good 2000s teen media, the transcendent high of riding in your crush's car, and THREE THINGS ABOUT WHICH BELLA IS ABSOLUTELY POSITIVE. Write to us at [email protected]. Join the coven! Follow us to catch our updates or subscribe for bonus eps and stickers over at Patreon.com/TwilightPhasePodcast. Please rate, review, and subscribe, and follow us @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

It's Port Angeles!!! Is it the best chapter ever put to paper?? We're dazzled, y'all. Write to us at [email protected]. Join the coven! Follow us to catch our updates or subscribe for bonus eps and stickers over at Patreon.com/TwilightPhasePodcast. Please rate, review, and subscribe, and follow us @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

Come for Bella DECIDING, NO MATTER WHAT (*judgmental side-eye*) that she's in TOO DEEP (somehow, already). Stay for our impromptu birthday roast of Melissa (luv youuuuu). Write to us at [email protected]. Join the coven! Follow us to catch our updates or subscribe for bonus eps and stickers over at Patreon.com/TwilightPhasePodcast. Please rate, review, and subscribe, and follow us @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

Pigeon > Turkey Gray eyes = love interest Jacob + Bella + 5 minutes = broken treaty Gossip = friendship And that's that on that. Write to us with more Twilight math at [email protected]. Join the coven! Follow us to catch our updates or subscribe for bonus eps and stickers over at Patreon.com/TwilightPhasePodcast. Please rate, review, and subscribe, and follow us @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

It's time for BLOOD TYPING IN BIOLOGY which is probs the best chapter in this book (until we get to the next chapter and that other one, but then there's also Port Angeles...). Did you ever notice how hilariously bad Edward is at keeping this secret?? We're having a great time and you should def come along with us. Write in at [email protected]. Join the coven! Follow us to catch our updates or subscribe for bonus eps and stickers over at Patreon.com/TwilightPhasePodcast. Please rate, review, and subscribe, and follow us @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

Bella and Edward have electrifying, mysterious, buck wild chemistry as they talk about nothing. Incredible. Amazing. All the boys are obsessed with Bella...but we're obsessed with this book. Have questions about the publishing industry? We'll be answering some on a Patreon bonus episode, so head on over to subscribe and ask your questions. You can always write in at [email protected]. Join the coven! Follow us to catch our updates or subscribe for bonus eps and stickers over at Patreon.com/TwilightPhasePodcast. Please rate, review, and subscribe, and follow us @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

Bella almost gets hit by van, and life is beautiful. Remember the mystery and majesty and adrenaline rush of having a CRUSH? Two questions: Have we identified Stephenie’s greatest skill? And if you had a near-death experience in high school, would you have been a Bella or a Melissa? WRITE to us at [email protected] to let us know! Join the coven! Bonus eps and stickers over at Patreon.com/TwilightPhasePodcast Please rate, review, and subscribe, and follow us @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

Hello listeners! In this episode we reread chapter two of Twilight! Bella, Edward, and Charlie both exhibit red flags, we ask ourselves hard questions (are we annoying?), and THE LOVE STORY BEGINS! Don’t look now listeners, Edward Cullen is staring at you… Join the coven! Bonus eps and stickers over at Patreon.com/TwilightPhasePodcast @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

WE MISSED YOU LISTENERS!!!! We’re back with the first episode of our Twilight reread. Let’s head into the forest together <3

We&#39;re kicking back with YOUR listener emails and wrapping up season five (!!!) Why aren&#39;t the Cullens tryna lick dandelions? Whatever happened with Maya&#39;s game of Survivor? What&#39;re our fave YA love triangles? What music are the Cullens listening to? Plus some book recs and theories from your fellow listeners! Join the coven! Bonus eps and stickers over at Patreon.com/TwilightPhasePodcast Subscribe and follow us to hear when we&#39;re back with TWILIGHT this fall &lt;3&lt;3 @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

We can’t believe we made it!! The end of the saga has arrived. We agree the ending of this is actually pretty cute, and we get a lil sappy reflecting on what this journey has meant to us. Thanks for being here <3. We’ll be back next season with more Twilight! Write in at [email protected]. Join the coven at Patreon.com/twilightphasepodcast Check us out at @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

This is the climax of the book (the series??), if you can believe it (we can&#39;t). Bella&#39;s shield works perfectly therefore nothing happens, and Alice arrives triumphantly with a plot point whose monologue will solve the entire conflict. Yay! Somehow there’s only one chapter left in Breaking Dawn—come with us as we finish out this ~~~~~saga ~~~~~~~~together 🥲 Write in at [email protected]. Join the coven at Patreon.com/twilightphasepodcast Check us out at @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

A lot doesn’t happen in this chapter of Breaking Dawn (this book is almost over??) but we do get the worst sentence in the whole series, probably. Tune in to hear what made us collectively gag! Write in at [email protected]. Join the coven at Patreon.com/twilightphasepodcast Check us out at @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

Welcome back listeners!! It&#39;s time to talk about how Aro is highkey a great villain, the vibes of the chapter are immaculate, and also how somehow SMeyer pulled off six and a half pages of walking. Now that&#39;s art!! Write in at [email protected]. Join the coven at Patreon.com/twilightphasepodcast Check us out at @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

Hey listeners!! In this episode we discuss Bella&#39;s flammability, her sexiness despite another head to toe khaki look, and the mysterious disappearance of Jacob. Do we...miss him? Nah!! Write in at [email protected]. Join the coven at Patreon.com/twilightphasepodcast Check us out at @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com

A small child receives a PROMISE RING (!!!) and Alistair&#39;s departure stirs up DRAMA. Meanwhile Bella decides having a mom doesn&#39;t sound that important anyway. Write in at [email protected]. Join the coven at Patreon.com/twilightphasepodcast Check us out at @Twilight_Phase on Twitter and Instagram, Twilightphasepodcast.tumblr.com