What Would Mark Twain Say?

PODCAST · arts

What Would Mark Twain Say?

Portraying Mark Twain for 35 years,has allowed me a foretaste of heavenprior to my earthly contract running out.The Wild Humorist of the Pacific Slopehas taught me that even in this crazy worldit is possible, no, vital, to smile…

  1. 234

    Dolley Madison

    But what distinguishes Dolley to my mind, and makes her ahero of her time, really, is the way she single-handedly saved an American treasure…

  2. 233

    Take Two Aspirin

    It was to be that little mouse’s, and McAvoy’s lucky Maui day…

  3. 232

    Judge Lloyd George

    “So Sam, what do you think about President Teddy Rooseveltnow that you’re up here?”

  4. 231

    Waterskiing the Caldecott Tunnel

    Once upon a time I had the best job in America...

  5. 230

    Saving Huck

    "All right, then, I'll go to hell.”

  6. 229

    Sunshine on the Forest Floor

    How can we avoid a Third World War?

  7. 228

    The Mississippi

    By the way, Marquette, how in blazes are we going to getback home?"

  8. 227

    The Northwest Passage

    So you might be wondering,is there a moral to this history? 

  9. 226

    Discovering Our Fountain of Youth

    “I must have been drinking from the Fountain of Youth.”

  10. 225

    Hands Off that Autonomous Weapon!

    It’s a powerful piece of music, a piece of music that could rightfully become a 2026 anthem for all nations of the world, in welcoming a peaceful dawn…

  11. 224

    A Short History of News Reporting

    I can only imagine the reaction those Commandments might have had in France…“No adultery?  Hey, I’m French!”

  12. 223

    Flocking Together

    It can happen, as art so often becomes a catalyst for creativity.

  13. 222

    Diamond Peak is Sixty

    Still, on my daily walks, I gaze up there and long to be gliding down, with a song in my heart, carving turns to the beat of Lido Shuffle, and thanking those who came before me formaking Diamond Peak such a wonderful place to capture the essence of life with a perfect run…

  14. 221

    Big Birthdays

    I was invited to John Rolf’s bachelor party the night before he married Pocahontas...

  15. 220

    The Day We Lost Born Again Smitty

    If ever there was an act of God that was identifiable to me,that was it…

  16. 219

    Now Let's Get Your Story Out!

    If you do those two things, read good books and provide yourself with some solitude, your story will jump out just like that Celebrated Jumping Frog of Calaveras County. ..

  17. 218

    Football 2026

    At the end of my string, I turned to that Oracle of Prophecy, my ex-wife, whose favorite team is the Bengals, though she calls them the “Bagels.”

  18. 217

    Rob Robins RIP

    Whether deep into a good game of poker, or enjoying a cigar with friends, he was forever cheerful, and just booming with good fellowship…

  19. 216

    By the Numbers

    In a thousand cruises into Emerald Bay, the one where the bride turned into her mother is the one I remember most...

  20. 215

    Night of the Cotton Bouquet

    Meanwhile, that drive-in movie taught me a lesson that I call upon even today, that beauty is in the eye of the beholder,and in the touch of the beholder, as was the case in that night of the cotton bouquet…           

  21. 214

    My Best Friend

    Stay tuned to these pages for the final chapters of Adventures of Huckleberry Jay…

  22. 213

    I Was Here Once Before

    There is more to the transmigration of souls to be discovered.

  23. 212

    Knowing Your Vivaldi

    I am writing on musical adrenalin alone...

  24. 211

    Flirting with Death

    I got into a gunfight with a gentleman from North Vietnam, and he was as bad a shot as I was, thank goodness. ..

  25. 210

    The AI Era & Us

    When AI learns how to see, well, we had all better start looking for a place to hide...

  26. 209

    The Miracle Worker

    Then he pulled and pried me until I was as flexible as a circus performer, and I’ve never been quite so tall in my long life. ..

  27. 208

    That Seventh Grader

    My surfer friend took a long last look at his Waikapu Whacko, tucked it between his thumb and forefinger, and flicked it unceremoniously onto the road...

  28. 207

    Animals at Play

    Sea otters are stealing surfboards in Santa Cruz...

  29. 206

    Hamstringing Putin

    No longer is the question, “How many fighter jets do you have,” but, “How many drones do you have?”

  30. 205

    Mark Twain Days

    Sam would be proud...

  31. 204

    What if Women Ruled the World?

    So if we can get this done before we blow ourselves up, wouldn’t it be nice?

  32. 203

    It's the Bed

    “When angry, count four; when very angry, go ahead and swear.  It's the people's poetry.”

  33. 202

    The Hornet

    Surviving at sea 43 days on 10 day’s rations for 15 men, they washed ashore at Laupahoihoi on the Big Island of Hawaii.

  34. 201

    The Charter Oak

    A very smart lady took that charter and hid it in a tree, the hollow of an oak tree to be exact...

  35. 200

    IRL

    Meanwhile I shall remain a friend trying to become a better person in a country trying to become a better democracy… 

  36. 199

    Grand Harmony

    I’ve been reading of late that plants can talk to each other and can even talk to certain bugs in a tongue that you and I cannot hear. ..

  37. 198

    Fifty-eight Tears 1967

    ...and a tear ran down her cheek.

  38. 197

    Myrtle Huddleston

    The first person to swim across Lake Tahoe was a woman, naturally, Myrtle Huddleston. ..

  39. 196

    Guinness Book of World Records

    Just looking at some of the records in the Guinness Book has caused me to wonder how I might become officially amazing by getting my name in that book somewheres, and I think I’vehit on it...

  40. 195

    Do No Harm 2026 Third Party

    The true measure of a person is not net worth, but net humanity.

  41. 194

    Finland's Wife Carrying Contest

    So you might be wondering, what is the prize for winning the World’s Wife Carrying Championships? I thought you’d never ask. The grand prize is the winners’ total weight in beer.

  42. 193

    The Return of Chautauqua 2025

    You just might get swept away into another person’s life, another person’s time, that will thrill and entertain you to no end…

  43. 192

    Love at First Sight Part Two

    That evening we went body surfing at midnight under a full moon, and a couple porpoises joined us as playmates and instructors...

  44. 191

    Love at First Sight

    That was this boy’s lucky day...

  45. 190

    Capt. Cook & Me

    Thereupon, not unlike Captain Cook, I shoved off to where no man had gone before.

  46. 189

    Founding Incline Village

    "This little village of ours is going to need a really good name."

  47. 188

    One Page Autobiography

    Future readings will serve to advance human understanding and tolerance.

  48. 187

    Review of Ron Chernow's Mark Twain Biography

    If you’re hoping to check it out of your library you should expect to be put on a waiting list.

  49. 186

    Mark Curtis

    They even let me climb inside Sputnik Two...

  50. 185

    What Starlings Can Teach Us

    They administer that kindness regardless of those other birds’ political beliefs...

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ABOUT THIS SHOW

Portraying Mark Twain for 35 years,has allowed me a foretaste of heavenprior to my earthly contract running out.The Wild Humorist of the Pacific Slopehas taught me that even in this crazy worldit is possible, no, vital, to smile…

HOSTED BY

McAvoy Layne

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