Wholehearted with Shawn Zajas

Two friends. One three-hour conversation about the biggest question there is. Shawn Zajas believes Jesus is the way. Adrian Lefler had an experience at 29 that convinced him the divine is bigger than any single religion. Neither is trying to win — both are trying to get to what's real.This isn't a debate built to score points. It's an honest, exploratory, and genuinely warm conversation between two people who respect each other and refuse to flinch away from the hard parts. If you've ever wrestled with whether Christianity is "the only way," why a good God allows so much suffering, or whether you can actually KNOW the truth or only experience it — this is a conversation worth sitting with. Adrian grew up devoutly Mormon, served a mission in New York City, and then had a mystical experience that cracked the foundation of everything he'd been taught. Over the next decade he tore his belief system down to the studs and rebuilt it from his own encounters with the divine — landing somewhere closer to non-dual mysticism, panpsychism, and "we are all one consciousness experiencing itself." Shawn comes at it from the other side: a follower of Jesus who cares less about denominations and doctrine and more about knowing the living God, spiritual warfare, and loving weak and broken people the way he believes God does. WHAT WE GET INTO: • Is Jesus the only way to God — or one map among many? • The problem of evil: if God is all-good, why does He allow suffering? Is God BEYOND good and evil? • Leaving Mormonism — what actually happens when your whole community is your faith • A "born again" experience at 29 that felt more real than reality itself • Consciousness, panpsychism, and the idea that the brain is a "tuning fork" for God • Do miracles require God to "break" physics — or are we already at the center of it? • Angels, the unseen realm, and spiritual warfare • How do you decide what's true — personal experience, or the Bible? • Why Shawn had to be broken of "the Shawn show" before he could actually see God • Grace vs. works, performance vs. being loved, and the danger of Christian culture without God • Following a living God who won't sit still for your theology Whether you're a Christian, deconstructing, spiritual-but-not-religious, agnostic, ex-Mormon, or just fascinated by the biggest questions of meaning, God, and truth — pull up a chair. It goes to some uncomfortable places and stays kind the whole way through. CHAPTERS: 0:00 Cold open 0:41 Two men, two starting points 7:45 Leaving Mormonism — a crack in the foundation 10:36 The experience at 29: "born again," but bigger 22:57 The problem of evil: is God beyond good & evil? 31:05 Can God be love without a choice? Law vs. intelligence 46:21 Miracles, consciousness & panpsychism 51:10 Angels and the unseen realm 57:23 "We are literally gods" 1:05:08 How do you know what's true — experience or the Bible? 1:14:14 When it stopped being the "Shawn show" 1:26:06 The greatest love story ever told 1:34:47 "You are the ocean" 1:39:47 Holding his son: "nothing greater than that" 1:56:05 Loving weak & broken people over performance 2:14:29 Follow the living God, not the snapshot 2:21:33 "Shawn, I'm your rope" — true abundance is light GUEST: Adrian Lefler 👉 https://www.youtube.com/@Byte-Sized-Podcast HOST: Shawn Zajas — Wholehearted. Conversations for anyone who's ever felt too far gone. [Wholehearted links — website / socials: TODO] If this stirred something in you: you're not too far gone. No matter what's died in you — come back to life. #Wholehearted #ShawnZajas #AdrianLefler #ByteSized #Faith #God #Jesus #Christianity #ProblemOfEvil #Mysticism #Panpsychism #Spirituality #Deconstruction #ExMormon #Consciousness #Theology #Podcast

Where was God when everything fell apart? It's the question almost everyone asks eventually — usually in the dark, usually alone. In this conversation, Pastor Pete Ngai (Hand of Mercy) — Shawn Zajas's own pastor — refuses to give the easy, sanitized answer. Instead, he sits with the hard questions: suffering, grief, doubt, spiritual warfare, and what it actually means to be known and loved by God. This isn't a polished sermon. It's an honest, unhurried, deeply human conversation between a pastor and the man he's walked with — about the parts of faith that don't fit on a bumper sticker. We get into why a good God allows real pain, the difference between free will and fatalism, and how to hold onto faith when life doesn't make sense. Pete talks about spiritual warfare in a way that's grounded rather than sensational — including the thoughts running through your head that were never actually yours. We dig into the difference between knowing ABOUT God and actually KNOWING Him, and why so many people are exhausted from performing for a Father who never asked them to. Along the way, Pete shares the stories and images that shaped his faith: holding his newborn son and learning what a father's love really costs, the spirit of rejection that fed him lies for years, the hardest cases that test everyone's faith, and the quiet despair of standing in an empty church wondering whether anyone would come back next week. These aren't theological abstractions — they're scars, and they're where his theology actually comes from. If you've ever wondered whether faith can survive real grief — or whether God is good when life clearly isn't — this conversation is for you. — What we talk about — • Where is God in suffering, grief, and loss? • Why a good God allows pain — free will vs. fatalism • Spiritual warfare and the battle for your mind • The thoughts in your head that aren't actually yours • Knowing God vs. merely knowing about God • Identity, performance, and the exhausting need to earn love • The Father's love and what it means to be fully known • Healing, deliverance, and walking with God day to day • Honest doubt, dark nights, and faith that holds anyway — Questions this conversation answers — • Why does God allow suffering if He's good and all-powerful? • How do you keep your faith after losing someone you love? • What is spiritual warfare, and how do you fight it in everyday life? • How can you tell the difference between your own thoughts and lies you've believed? • What does it actually mean to "know God" personally? • Why do so many Christians feel like they have to perform to be loved? • How do you find healing from rejection, shame, and a performance mindset? • Is it okay to doubt God — and can faith survive the dark seasons? — Moments that stayed with us — Pete on the love a father pours out: "Son, this is how I love you." The hardest cases that make people question everything — and a God who never looks away. The spirit of rejection that whispers lies until you finally name it. And the line that reframes the whole thing: eternal life isn't knowing about Him, it's knowing Him. — Who this is for — Anyone wrestling with hard questions about God and suffering. Anyone tired of performing for their faith. Anyone walking through grief, anxiety, or a season where God feels far away — and anyone who wants a faith that's honest enough to survive real life. — About Pastor Pete Ngai — Pete Ngai leads Hand of Mercy and has spent decades pastoring people through the hardest seasons of their lives — sickness, addiction, grief, and spiritual oppression. He's known for refusing to flinch from hard questions and for a kind of faith that's been tested rather than inherited. He is also Shawn's pastor, which is part of why this conversation goes where most interviews don't. 🙏 Connect with Pastor Pete Ngai 👉 @petengai6830 https://www.youtube.com/@petengai6830 — About The Shawn Zajas Show — Shawn Zajas sits down with people worth listening to for honest, long-form conversations about faith, identity, calling, and the life of God with us. No hype, no formula — just real conversations that go deeper than the highlight reel. 🎙️ Host: Shawn Zajas Subscribe for more: https://www.youtube.com/@wholeheartedwithShawnZajas New conversations posted regularly — hit the bell so you don't miss one. If this conversation meant something to you, the most helpful thing you can do is share it with one person who needs it, leave a comment with what stood out, and subscribe so more of these can happen. — Chapters — Chapters will be added once the final cut is locked. #faith #God #Christianity #PastorPete #PeteNgai #HandOfMercy #spiritualwarfare #healing #deliverance #testimony #grief #suffering #identity #fatherslove #ShawnZajasShow #ChristianPodcast #faithoverfear #knowingGod #jesus #christianliving

Dino Watt grew up in a broken home. His parents divorced when he was eight. He lived in a five-by-ten trailer with no running water as a teenager. He has dyslexia. He never went to college.He is also one of the most respected relationship coaches in the dental industry, a keynote speaker, an author, and a man who has been married to his wife Shannon for 33 years.In this conversation, Dino shares the frameworks, stories, and hard-won truths behind a life that looks nothing like a straight line. You will hear the moment his wife came out of the bathroom after a year-long road trip and told him she could not do another year of financial uncertainty. The stranger at a dental event who looked at him and said "you walk different" and changed everything. The talk where he apologized for not having a college degree and his wife met him backstage with four words that stopped him cold.This is a conversation about marriage, money, meaning, and why in a world of curated perfection, the messy is what makes you relatable.⏱ CHAPTERS00:00 Why Dino Watt stands out 01:00 Growing up in a broken home 02:30 Dyslexia and learning from television 05:00 The day his dad drove away 09:00 The braces story and becoming his mother's protector 11:30 Living in a trailer with no running water 16:00 The early calling to teach marriage 22:00 The Attribution Model: Being, Output, Outcome 27:00 The night Shannon said she couldn't do another year 30:00 Building a culture before a marriage 33:00 The adult children years nobody warns you about 37:00 Security and validation: the two drivers for women 44:00 Money, shame, and praying over the toilet 50:00 Experience over things 55:00 The gift of range and a multi-skilled career 01:00:00 "You walk different" 01:08:00 His son's suicidality 01:11:00 The character we choose to play 01:13:00 Tom Brady as a case study in meaning 01:16:00 Why we diminish our own success 01:20:00 The Dental Town talk and Shannon's rebuke 01:28:00 Dino's real gift: helping people feel seen 01:35:00 The hair transplant that gave doctors permission 01:44:00 Authenticity in the age of AI 01:48:00 The sailboat that never leaves the harbor 01:52:00 The 12-year-old eulogy 01:54:00 The only eyes that matter🔗 CONNECT WITH DINO WATTWebsite: dinowatt.com Instagram: @dinowatt Email: [email protected]🎧 CONNECT WITH SHAWN ZAJASWebsite: shawnzajas.com Subscribe to weekly insights for 5,000+ leaders at shawnzajas.com Book Shawn to speak: shawnzajas.com📺 ABOUT THE SHAWN ZAJAS SHOWThe Shawn Zajas Show illuminates the human journey behind dental innovation and entrepreneurship. Through authentic conversations with pioneers, innovators, and transformation experts, Shawn explores how breaking free from conventional wisdom creates unprecedented results and empowers listeners to trust their unique vision and make their greatest impact.New episodes every week. Subscribe so you don't miss the next conversation.🔔 If this episode moved something in you, hit subscribe and leave a comment with the quote that landed hardest. I read every one.