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All episodes

Your New Best Friends, 92 episodes.

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Title
1

She probably has salty knees

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2

I'm sitting in my house with my fingers in my mouth

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3

Marty K & The Equality B!tches

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4

You're getting juice everywhere

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5

I'm not putting him in my mouth unless it gets physical

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6

What's your scent? Despair and avocados?

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7

Eat Out Rock 'VS' The Nomad Humper

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8

Who thinks you could possibly be too fat for gravity?

9

I think we all have a little Jack Sparrow in us

10

Bonus Material: You smell like vinegar, do you Uber for Blimpies?

11

This is the Bluetooth of dildos
12

The Newlywed Game: On the same page, not the same paragraph

13

Lil Game Plan: “Blowin out backs & countin up stacks”

14

The Pyramid Game: Dogs that sound like German foods

15

Life is good, you just need your underwear clean
16

Watching my donk swing in my sweatpants

17

The movers took a bag of socks and the vibrator
18

A black bouquet after a break up

19

Your hair is lice Barbados

20

Someone call Britney Spears cause that’s toxic

21

Groaning down there like a ghoul

22

You have a permit for that wagon you’re draggin?

23

This burner phone is blowing up and I can’t have it

24

I want the alphabet mafia on my side

25

Your rotund body took out the light fixtures

26

You better lawyer up, that cop touched my cooter

27

BONUS EPISODE!: Your New Best Friends meets Convosaries!

28

Care-free, fun-loving, I don't hit you, good vibes. Looking for real deal

29

I would’ve killed for a mouth full of pubic hair in high school

30

Nothing holds sh!t like suede

31

His d!ck was the CEO of his underpants

32

I need you to Uber Eats that ass over here

33

I once got a nosebleed after a big gal sat on my face too hard

34

Cervix, be damned

35

You blew their back out in the worst way

36

The hypnotic jiggles of your body

37

Your grandma’s ring is on my finger, we gotta get it off

38

Medically speaking, I gotta bust these nuts

39

When booty calls, you pick it up

40

You’re a little bitter Betty

41

Those sense don’t make dollars

42

You’ve got spunk on your shirt, it’s meatloaf Tuesday

43

I got pizza on good faith

44

A gross of tampons, a box of Twinkies and a water gun

45

Just wanted to lay your body in some soup
46

Class is: Always having a drink in your hand but never being drunk

47

Cut off jean shorts, Crocs and a Thundercats shirt

48

What you’re doing to that banjo is a hate crime

49

The 10 Petty Commandments

50

He gets trickle down wimp

51

You belong on Satan’s nightstand

52

At what store did you buy the audacity?

53

We would’ve Virgin Mary’d one another

54

Two people duet sh!t into a box

55

She was a gold digger who didn’t like toast

56

Do I think I can wrangle? Call me Steve Irwin
57

Just a lonely girl and her wedge of cheese

58

Your New Best Friends: Best of SEASON 2
59

Your New Best Friends: Best of SEASON 1

60

I was lips deep in her, I burped and we lost a kid
61

Your New Best Friends (Trailer)
62

Next thing you know, you've had an erection for 20 minutes and you're starting to black out

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63

You're on a roll, I'm on a brioche bun

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64

Welcome to McNutBuster's, how may I help you?

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65

His shirt says, “Skin on Skin”; The Apology Tour

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66

It’s a buffet of perfection and I just wanna eat

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67

I'm floating away with the blood of a thousand men on my hands

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68

I need to go to the doctor and get some sort of ointment

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69

She's gone, and I'm stuck with these neck tattoos

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70

So, your ass gets a disease and it travels the river butthole inside of you?

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71

I was trying to keep it in my boundaries. So, you put on a turtleneck?

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72

Discreet gentleman, good looking, 33, recently divorced, enjoys titty milk

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73

It's all a humping blur

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74

That's not scissoring, that's just mound pounds *Audio issue for 1 minute at 5 min mark. Apologies*

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75

I don't think your butthole is the gate keeper

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76

I got stomped out by a 6th grader, in like, glitter sneakers

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77

Just yesterday, I was naked in my kitchen, eating Jell-O

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78

Feathers are the marijuana to choking, they're the gateway

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79

I'm never liquid in currency, ever

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80

Suffocated, drowned and had bird seed thrown in his face

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81

I wanna come in there with all my teeth, I wanna leave there with all my teeth

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82

I courted her, I took her to the finest Applebee's

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83

I had my first frowngasm

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84

Then I'm throwing paws at an orgy

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85

So that dog spite vomited?

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86

You sound like you're anti prostate

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87

Maybe it's a port-a-potty themed wedding

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88

You flush the toilet and it's a jacuzzi

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89

I lint rolled my shirt for that

90

I love crab salad, I just hate when it hits you wrong
91

Anything can be a diaper if you take a sh*t in it
92

Would your neighbor be able to shake you down for $20?