Brain Damage with Scott

My Struggles with Suicidal Thoughts. ReasonstoStay.co.uk. Not a fun topic. But it’s always timely. So much depression, anger, addiction, frustration, sadness, hate, deception, lies, violence going on all over the world. What can we do about it? How can my story help others? How can you help others? Who can help you? Who would you reach out to? Stay with us. We need you. You do matter. You are loved and worthy of help and support.

There is something very wrong in a lot of USA churches. Especially the ones who have large businesses operations with big buildings and a mass of people attending. These factors seem to take precedence over true disciple making. What even is a disciple? Are we doing church as Jesus Christ wants us to? Or are we just operating successfully as monetary businesses? Are lives being changed? Why or why not? Let’s see if there are problems. This is part of an ongoing process of exploring how God desires to live in and through us. Other podcasts discuss the theological implications. This one addresses just a few things related to operating more like big business than life transformation centers. There is hope discussed at the end. Let’s solve this mess together.

We think we know things. We don’t. We think we can trust specific leaders. We can’t. We have high hopes for our politicians. They are all controlled by powers above them and lying to us. WTF is really going on? Where is the unredacted Epstein perpetrator list?!?! Why is nothing being done to stop fraud and waste in the government?!?! What can we do? We’re just peasants.

My story. Undoing the lie that “Before God can use a man greatly He must hurt him deeply.” This is my raw, vulnerable, transparent story of how Father God smashed the shame and self-loathing out of me by His goodness and love. Wow! I shed a lot of tears in this one. Listen, if you dare. I share because I strongly want you to know how much God loves us all.

We need elders, presbyters, episkoposes, teachers, shepherds, pastors. We need life wisdom experience. We need old, wise people to help us grow up and mature. Is it working? Why or why not? How do we improve this so we have older people who have wisdom?

This is the good news. Luke 2:9-14. The message from the angel of God to the shepherds is gooooood good news casting out mega fear from allll all humans. This is the message of Christmas. And it gets even crazier as the angel describes how God feels and believes about us: all humans. Check this out and get your world rocked and your life transformed by God’s love for you. Immanuel, God with us is here. Jesus is the Savior, Healer, Deliverer, Restorer of Allll all. Belee Dat!!!

Arm humorous take on my last workout of the year which happened to be leg day, so I currently have a lot of post traumatic stress from what I did to myself. I am also recovering from the hot bath I took and all the strange items that were in the foofoo woman bath salt mix. Pretty sure there were moths, bugs and leeches. And the machine I couldn’t remember the name of was… a hip thruster. Yep, I do those now. Semi competitive bodybuilder doing hard workouts. Let’s go!!! LFG!!! Happy New Year!!!

Stories about how I sucked at being a parent. Don’t suck at being a parent. Think differently than I was taught. Better beliefs lead to better behavior. Let’s go and grow together. There is room for improvement. Stop beating yourself up for your mistakes. Time to change how we think and take steps towards repairing and improving relationships.

If your church has a bad news first message, it is Not the good news (gospel) of Jesus Christ. God is always and only: Savior, Healer, Deliverer, Restorer. There is no bad news from Jesus Christ. He is God, one with the Father. The Father is exactly like Jesus. God is with us: Immanuel! God is in us. Jesus becoming a human baby is great news for ALL! Not just good news for those who say a magic, tearful, remorse filled prayer. Merry Christmas to All. Great, mega Joy to all!! The news is good for everyone.

This will probably piss off a lot of people. Good! Truth matters. I got sucked into a couple bull $#it MLM companies and can now spot them easily. Nothing is verifiable by science. Only their secret one in the world scientists have developed this new world’s best secret product to detox earth and turn you into a superhero. Yep. I bought the hype before. They are all crap. They all cost five times what they are worth. And…they don’t work. But the placebo effect is 30% anyway, so go ahead and support your friend’s independent business consultant schtick.

Specialist bestest guest, my wife Darla. How did we get here? 22 years married. Lessons learned. Difficult stuff growing up and in first marriage. How we met. What connected us. Where are we now in our relationship with God and each other. What has happened during our detox, deconstruction, reconstruction?

Men are not very well educated on dealing with emotions. I wasn’t taught how to handle them in a healthy manner. Not sure I ever talked with anyone about having emotions. If rage is the only emotion you have learned from a man; that is unhealthy, low EQ, emotional disregulation (or something messy like that). Let’s learn this stuff together without merely stuffing it down.

My son, Stephen, took me to the 2025 Mr. Olympia Expo and Show. This is our story and experience. A look inside the expo and stories of meeting many of the athletes. Then I share a bit of my own competition journey which was two weeks later and my glorious gold medal wins!!!

Sometimes life takes a poop on you. I have been struggling with awful humans are to each other. I have been pissed off at political parties and their evil lying, fear mongering, and control seeking over their minions who wrongly believe they are being served as constituents. It’s been a struggle mess. Life is good. People are jack wad wing nuts. And… Jesus Christ still wants us to love them. How? Why? What do we do?

All things health, fitness, nutrition, muscle building for dudes over 40. Lessons learned. Crap to avoid. People to avoid: anyone selling a product more than the truth and anyone using fear to influence you. Steer clear if they use fear. Run from scare tactic scammers. You can get stronger and build muscle after 40. Your doctor is probably an ignorant idiot about most of what I say here. Let’s find the truth together.

My Father in law passed away 3 weeks ago. It’s been sudden, rough, sad, and all the regular grief stuff. There is more legal junk to deal with. That holds up some closure. But I want to brag about him so you get to know how well he loved Jesus and people. I learned a LOT about how to love from him. Sometimes he didn’t have to say a word. He just loved. I am learning. Let’s flush our crappy beliefs and learn to love ourselves and others like Darrell and Jesus love.

About 1 week ago a new podcast from "Modern Wisdom" hosetd by Chris Williamson popped up. As a semi-theologian, I was very interested in -Ang & Ari, "Girls Gone Bible," podcast and listened to them share. I could easily hear all of the USA evangelical doctrine, beliefs, and lingo in their words. I am excited for their journey into freedom. I am also saddened that they are attempting to grow up in their faith in the American version of Christianity which is highly influenced by Augustine and his angry, violent, punishing Father God; everyone is a terrible sinner teachings. Calvin, Luther, and Roman Catholics ALL follow his teachings very closely. There are several other orthodox views early church fathers had that are very different. Some of these views are finally gaining some traction in the USA. Many details are discussed here. The end result is that the Father never punishes, tortures, kills, abuses anyone; EVER! The after-life torture chamber was invented off of Augustine's views and grown massively by Emperor Justinian I and Dante, not Scripture! Papa is exactly like Jesus Christ. God [the triune ONE] is always loving, healing, doing surgery to remove the disease of sin [not punish us for bad behavior]. God's wrath is against the disease of sin; not us, or our goofy lapses in judgement or moral behavior.   If Ang & Ari, listen to this, I hope you grow in this amazing joy, love, grace, and freedom from Jesus so you don't struggle with wondering if Father really accepts you completely.

What matters? What matters to you? Why? Are you focusing on important stuff or useless, selfish $#it?! Do what matters to your soul / spirit. Have people help you figure out what that is, so you aren't merely doing what you hope will make you feel good about your existence. You are not alone in the struggle. Why am I here? What is my purpose in life? What brings me and others joy or happiness? How can I know if I am on the right track? Get in community to build deep relationships to help you and them focus on important life stuff. You have immense value. You are a human. You were created from, by, and for love. Papa made you to be His beloved; always.

Just before I turned 30, I graduated with a Masters of Divinity [M.Div.] from TEDS, Trinity Evangelical Divinity School; now called Trinity International University. I was and am still not a "master" of divine things or beliefs. This is my story of being set free from the angry Father doctrines espoused by John Calvin, Martin Luther, the Roman Catholic Church all by way of Saint Augustine and his sin controlling theology. I thank Papa that He set me free from the punishment view of sin to the physician view of healing us all from that disease and the delusion that we are separated and disappointments to God. Come along and learn the Papa is just like Jesus and always has and will love you.

Who the heck am I?! Why do I think the way I do? What influenced me to become who I am? Which leads to why I am recording these podcasts.

Grok answer: The early Christian Church, from the time of the apostles to around 400 A.D., developed a rich theology concerning the love of Jesus Christ and God the Father, rooted in Scripture and expounded through apostolic teachings, writings of the Church Fathers, and early Christian practices. Below is a concise summary in bullet points, based on historical Christian texts and traditions from this period: • Apostolic Teaching (1st Century): • The apostles, following Jesus’ teachings, emphasized God’s love as the foundation of salvation, exemplified in John 3:16 (“For God so loved the world that He gave His only Son”). • Jesus’ commandment to “love one another as I have loved you” (John 13:34) was central, with love reflecting Christ’s sacrificial death on the cross. • Paul’s epistles, such as Romans 5:8 (“God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us”), taught that Christ’s love reconciles humanity to the Father. • The Eucharist, instituted by Christ, was seen as an expression of His sacrificial love, uniting believers with God (1 Corinthians 11:23–25). • Post-Apostolic Era (100–200 A.D.): • Early writings, like the Didache and Epistle of Barnabas, stressed living out Christ’s love through charity, forgiveness, and community life, reflecting the Father’s love. • Ignatius of Antioch (c. 110 A.D.) described God’s love as revealed in Christ’s incarnation and passion, urging believers to imitate this self-giving love (Letter to the Romans). • Justin Martyr (c. 150 A.D.) highlighted God’s love as universal, extending to all humanity, with Christ’s death as the ultimate proof, contrasting pagan philosophies (First Apology). • Church Fathers and Theological Development (200–300 A.D.): • Irenaeus of Lyons (c. 180 A.D.) taught that God’s love is shown in the incarnation, where Christ recapitulates humanity to restore it to the Father (Against Heresies). • Clement of Alexandria (c. 200 A.D.) described God’s love as pedagogical, guiding humanity through Christ’s teachings toward divine wisdom (Stromata). • Tertullian (c. 200 A.D.) emphasized the Father’s love as the source of creation and redemption, with Christ’s obedience on the cross as its fullest expression (On the Flesh of Christ). • Love was expressed practically in Christian communities through almsgiving, care for the poor, and martyrdom, seen as imitating Christ’s love. • Pre-Nicene and Early Nicene Period (300–400 A.D.): • Origen (c. 250 A.D.) taught that God’s love is eternal, flowing from the Father through the Son to humanity, and that human response to this love is participation in divine life (On First Principles). • The Church’s response to persecution underscored Christ’s love as empowering martyrs to face death, reflecting the Father’s love for the world (e.g., Martyrdom of Polycarp). • Athanasius (c. 350 A.D.) in On the Incarnation explained that the Father’s love prompted the Son’s incarnation to restore humanity from sin, emphasizing divine love as restorative. • The Council of Nicaea (325 A.D.) indirectly reinforced teachings on love by affirming Christ’s divinity, ensuring that His love is understood as divine, not merely human. • Basil the Great and Gregory of Nyssa (c. 370–400 A.D.) linked God’s love to the Trinity, teaching that the Father’s love is expressed through the Son and Spirit, fostering unity and charity among believers (Letters of Basil; Life of Moses by Gregory). • Practical Expressions of Love: • Early Christians practiced love through communal sharing (Acts 2:44–45), hospitality to strangers, and care for widows and orphans, as seen in texts like Shepherd of Hermas. • The Church’s emphasis on forgiveness and reconciliation, as taught by Christ (Matthew 18:21–22), was a hallmark of imitating divine love. • By 400 A.D., monastic movements (e.g., Anthony of Egypt) emphasized asceticism as a response to Christ’s love, seeking union with the Father through prayer and sacrifice. This summary draws from primary sources like the New Testament, writings of the Church Fathers, and early Christian practices, reflecting the consistent teaching that God’s love, revealed through Jesus Christ, calls believers to a life of love, sacrifice, and communion with the Father. If you’d like me to expand on any point or source, let me know!

Grok answer: Politicians, business leaders, and church leaders can misuse power in similar ways to maintain control over their organizations, finances, and people, often leading to corruption. Below is a breakdown of how this occurs across these three domains, focusing on control, financial exploitation, and the impact of corruption. 1. Politicians Control Over Organization and People: • Manipulation of Systems: Politicians may manipulate electoral processes, gerrymander districts, or suppress votes to maintain power. For example, they might push laws or policies that favor their re-election or entrench their party’s dominance. • Patronage and Nepotism: They appoint loyalists to key positions, ensuring control over institutions. This can include rewarding supporters with jobs or contracts, creating a network of dependency. • Media Influence: Some politicians control narratives by aligning with or intimidating media outlets, spreading propaganda, or discrediting opposition to shape public perception. Control Over Money: • Misuse of Public Funds: Politicians may divert public resources for personal gain, such as through inflated contracts to allies or skimming budgets meant for public services. • Campaign Finance Abuse: They might exploit loopholes in campaign finance laws, accepting illicit donations or using political action committees to funnel money for personal or political gain. • Bribery and Kickbacks: Accepting bribes for policy favors or awarding contracts to donors undermines public trust and prioritizes personal enrichment. Corruption’s Impact: • Corruption erodes democratic institutions, as politicians prioritize self-interest over public welfare. It leads to inefficiency, with funds misallocated or stolen, causing infrastructure decay or inadequate services. Public disillusionment grows, fostering cynicism or unrest, while corrupt politicians may double down on authoritarian tactics to retain power, perpetuating a cycle of abuse. 2. Business Leaders Control Over Organization and People: • Authoritarian Management: Some CEOs or executives centralize decision-making, sidelining dissent or independent voices to maintain dominance. They may fire or demote those who challenge their authority. • Corporate Loyalty Schemes: Leaders cultivate loyalty through selective promotions, bonuses, or perks, ensuring employees prioritize the leader’s agenda over the company’s long-term health. • Manipulation of Boards: They may stack boards with allies or weaken oversight mechanisms, reducing accountability and entrenching their control. Control Over Money: • Financial Manipulation: Leaders may engage in insider trading, falsify financial reports (e.g., Enron’s accounting scandals), or inflate stock prices to boost personal wealth through bonuses or stock options. • Embezzlement and Fraud: Diverting company funds for personal use, such as lavish lifestyles or offshore accounts, is a common abuse. • Exploitation of Resources: Some prioritize short-term profits over sustainable practices, cutting corners on employee wages, safety, or environmental standards to maximize financial gain. Corruption’s Impact: • Corruption undermines trust in businesses, leading to stock price drops, legal penalties, or bankruptcy when exposed. Employees suffer from toxic workplaces or job losses, while consumers face subpar products or services. Corrupt leaders may resort to cover-ups or scapegoating, further damaging the organization’s reputation and stability. 3. Church Leaders Control Over Organization and People: • Spiritual Manipulation: Some leaders exploit religious authority, using doctrine or fear of divine judgment to control followers’ behavior, discouraging dissent or questioning. • Hierarchical Dominance: They may centralize power within the church, sidelining lay members or lower clergy to maintain influence over decisions and messaging. • Cult of Personality: Charismatic leaders often foster devotion to themselves rather than the institution, creating dependency among followers. Control Over Money: • Misuse of Donations: Church funds, often collected as tithes or offerings, may be diverted for personal luxury, such as private jets or lavish homes, rather than community welfare or church maintenance. • Lack of Transparency: Many religious organizations lack financial oversight, allowing leaders to siphon funds without accountability. • Exploitation of Followers: Some leaders pressure congregants to donate beyond their means, framing it as a spiritual obligation, while funneling money for personal gain. Corruption’s Impact: • Corruption in churches erodes faith, as followers feel betrayed when leaders prioritize wealth over spiritual guidance. Scandals (e.g., televangelist fraud or clergy abuse cover-ups) damage institutional credibility, reduce membership, and alienate communities. Leaders may double down on control tactics, such as shaming critics or invoking divine authority, to maintain power. Common Themes and Corruption’s Broader Effects • Power Preservation: Across all three domains, leaders misuse power to preserve their status, often prioritizing personal gain over the organization’s mission. This includes silencing critics, manipulating systems, or leveraging loyalty. • Financial Exploitation: Money is a central tool of corruption, whether through public funds, corporate profits, or religious donations. Lack of transparency and accountability enables this abuse. • Erosion of Trust: Corruption undermines the legitimacy of institutions, whether governments, corporations, or churches. It fosters public cynicism, reduces participation, and can lead to social or economic instability. • Cycle of Abuse: To stay in power, corrupt leaders often escalate their tactics—cracking down on dissent, manipulating narratives, or exploiting legal loopholes—perpetuating a cycle of corruption that’s hard to break. Differences in Context • Politicians face public scrutiny and electoral accountability, but their access to state resources amplifies their potential for large-scale corruption. • Business Leaders operate in a profit-driven environment, where market pressures and shareholder expectations can incentivize unethical shortcuts. • Church Leaders exploit spiritual trust, which can make their abuses particularly insidious, as followers may feel morally or divinely obligated to comply. Conclusion In all three spheres, the misuse of power stems from a desire to maintain control and access resources, often at the expense of the organization’s purpose and its stakeholders. Corruption thrives in environments with weak oversight, unchecked authority, or blind loyalty. Its consequences—distrust, inefficiency, and institutional decay—harm societies, economies, and communities, while corrupt leaders cling to power through increasingly desperate measures. Breaking this cycle requires transparency, accountability, and active engagement from those within and outside these systems.

People fear authenticity, vulnerability, and transparency because they worry about judgment, rejection, or being misunderstood. Opening up risks exposing flaws or emotions that others might criticize or exploit, especially in a world where social media and public scrutiny amplify every misstep. Many feel safer hiding behind a curated image to protect their ego or avoid conflict. Trust issues also play a role—being vulnerable requires confidence that others won’t use it against you. On the flip side, some avoid it because they’ve been conditioned to prioritize stoicism or perfection over genuine expression. Yet, embracing vulnerability often builds deeper connections, as it signals honesty and invites mutual openness. It’s a gamble, but the fear stems from potential loss outweighing perceived gain.

How can we become a healthy person and have healthy relationships? Most psychotherapists are nuts: lots of unresolved mommy and daddy issues. Is there still such a thing as a nuclear family? Is everything redefined about family? Don't we still need two parents to help us learn and grow into maturity? Where are we headed? Why are things so messed up? How do we handle our trauma? Where is the hope? And the love?

A lot of people love four letter "F" words; well, maybe just the main one. But this one; FEAR, is a huge problem and probably behind many of the uses of the other "F" word. Join us as we explore a bunch of the problems Fear cause, create, and combust. There will need to be follow up episodes to deal with more aspects of this problem that often overwhelms many a soul and locks folks up in prison cells of dread, terror, hiding, explosive rage, and more. Put away your shopping cart. Use your turn signal properly. Hug your mom, if you can. Let's get started.

What is normal? Who is normal? What does the word normal mean? Does it have any relevance anymore? Let’s dig in and wrestle with some wild concepts. Maybe we need to change how we think and the way we think and behave. Because we all be brain damaged!

Why am I doing this? What are my motives? What are we talking about? Why does any of this matter? Who cares? Who or what are the problems? How are we all brain damaged? Why is this rated R? Don’t tell my mom. Let’s figure out how to discover truth amidst all the lies we have been programmed to believe are The Truth. We will address health, fitness, nutrition, doctors, medicine, health care, politics, violence, religion, us vs them, Christian doctrines I no longer hold to and why, what I believe about Trinity God and why that affects all of us. And lastly for fun and safety we will discuss how to drive safely and not be an oblivious jerk or idiot. Hahaha. LFG!!!

I spent 30 years in the evangelical church world in the USA. Most of that was under the influence of Reformed Calvinist theology. I struggled with the teaching about Father God being angry, judgmental and punishing. If Jesus Christ is perfect love and 1 John 4 states Father God IS Love; how could the Hebrew scriptures really teach the angry Zeus and Janus-like god in the sky? What is God truly like? How did we get to this angry god? Which view is right, correct?

Part 1 of figuring out what is wrong with us and why. We all struggle with relationships. Why? Is everyone in this mess? Or just me? Is there help? Or do I alone struggle? I hear many people complain about relationship and marital strife, struggles, dissatisfaction. This is a first piece of explaining the problems and offering some steps to growing, maturing, and resolving issues and traumas.

Here is the basic analogy: when two people get married, they are often blindly and madly in love overlooking many negatives to focus on the connection and what draws them together. When conflict happens which ends in divorce, many times these two can no longer agree on anything and become vilifying enemies... much like how current democrats and republicans [lower case on purpose] nastily treat the other. It gets myopically blind and spiteful. Why? Does it need or have to be this way? Why do we treat our fellow citizens so awfully? Stop it! Let's learn how to talk truthfully without turning those who agree with us into fellow fighters against the other side.

Shame is a good thing in cultures where people have the best in mind for their fellow group members. Maybe?! Here in the USA, I am convinced shame is used primarily in a bad and very negative way to attack the person; not merely their behavior. It is a type of condemnation against those who violate the principles of the one in power. How dare you? How could you do that to me? Shame makes people feel like they ARE bad; not that they behaved bad. How do we deal with this traumatizing abuse?

Background for what the heck I am doing this podcast. We all have traumas and crazy life events that led us to believe absolute nonsense and garbage. When we grow into adult bodies, often we have so much childhood gunk that we are NOT mature emotionally or relationally. How did we become psychotic, mean, angry, crazy people? Oh, let's throw in the problem of "Good / Evil" to start wrestling with how we got into this mess and why we think our version of truth is correct and others are demon possessed whack-a-dos! Another topic we will wrestle with is health, fitness, and nutrition. So many lies are told in this area through marketing and medicine. AND, we might as well discuss how power politics and religion merged to take over the world and enslave all of us peasants. Let's have fun re-thinking everything we think we know and believe.

A teaser intro into why we are doing this podcast. What the Heaven / Hell is life about? Be patient. This is going to take a LONGGGGGGG time. Have fun learning and re-thinking most of what you believe. Crappy beliefs lead to crappy thinking and behaviors. Does God love ALL of us? Can you get fit, healthy, and strong after turning 50 years OLD? Let's also do some analysis of USA Christianity and punch Saint Augustine in the mouth for his very brain damaged, awful version of all humans being terrible sinners and Father God wanting to smash us. Did the Protestant Reformation accomplish anything? Also, do you really know how to drive your car safely, skillfully, and not completely oblivious to everybody else on the road? So much fun stuff. LFG!!!