Believe In Big Change

In this episode of Believe in Big Change, host Steve Pomeroy dives into one of the most common but overlooked struggles we all face: the negative mindset. He explores where negativity takes root, how it quietly shapes our daily lives, and—most importantly—practical steps we can take to transform it.Steve begins by breaking down three major sources of negativity:Stress from work, finances, relationships, health, and life responsibilities that can quietly consume us without our awareness.Unhealthy or toxic environments—whether in childhood, relationships, or workplaces—that create patterns of negativity we may unconsciously carry into adulthood.Unresolved trauma, which can leave deep emotional imprints and fuel self-criticism, fear, and unhealthy coping mechanisms.Through real-life examples and personal reflection, Steve highlights how negative thinking can show up in everyday life—perfectionism, self-rejection, over-focusing on criticism, fear of failure, and constantly expecting things to go wrong. Left unchecked, these patterns lead to low self-esteem, procrastination, victim mentality, self-sabotage, and even depression or addiction.But the heart of this episode is not just recognizing the problem—it’s learning how to change it. Steve shares five powerful practices that have helped him and countless others reclaim their mindset and move toward growth:Self-Compassion – Letting go of perfectionism, being gentle with yourself, and treating yourself with the same kindness you’d offer a friend.Self-Awareness – Creating space to notice your thoughts and feelings without judgment through meditation, journaling, nature walks, or quiet reflection.Acceptance – Learning to accept yourself, others, and situations as they are—finding peace in what you can’t control and power in what you can.Positive Self-Talk – Reframing thoughts, focusing on progress instead of setbacks, and practicing a “net positive” mindset to shift your perspective.Gratitude – Choosing to focus on what’s good, however small, to attract more positivity into your life and shift from problem-focused thinking to solution-focused living.Steve reminds us that change starts on the inside. By practicing compassion, awareness, acceptance, positivity, and gratitude daily, we can break free from destructive cycles, rebuild our confidence, and attract healthier relationships and opportunities.Whether you’ve battled perfectionism, struggled with trauma, or simply feel weighed down by stress, this episode offers encouragement, practical tools, and the reminder that you are not your past—you can choose a new mindset today.Steve closes with a heartfelt message of hope, courage, and love, inviting listeners to reach out, share their journey, and join the growing community of those who believe in big change.Connect with Steve on Facebook (Steve Pomeroy – Believe in Big Change), Instagram, and Medium, where he writes about topics such as homelessness and resilience. And be sure to explore past episodes for more conversations on overcoming obstacles and creating lasting transformation.Support the show

In the podcast you will learn more about:1. The causes of perfectionism - where does it come from?2. The negative adverse effects on your physical, mental, and emotional health3. Key traits-characteristics of a perfectionist4. How to overcome perfectionism thru increased self awareness, self acceptance, having a realistic plan and more.Support the show

In this podcast you will learn more about:1. One of the most common and most destructive negative thought patterns2. Where perfectionism comes from3. That we do not have to judge ourselves based on extremes4. How we can re frame our thoughts and find the ‘gray’Support the show

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In this podcast I discuss the importance of grieving a loss and ways to move through the process with support!Support the show

In this episode I discuss why resentments contributed to me becoming alcoholic, relapsing, and nearly destroying my life. Support the show

I'm going to talk about a subject that I can relate to in so many different ways. It's the subject of self sabotage. I'm also gonna share with you four ways that I use to prevent me from self sabotaging and if I am going down that path for me to identify where I'm at and have a plan to move out of that behavior. Support the show

This month I share 3 ways to protect yourself from codependency. These ideas have helped me tremendously on my journey. - Steve

My tips for a beginner meditation during this stressful time in our world. Enjoy!

This topic is recovery, recovering from abusive toxic relationships. Many people that are toxic, that have entered our lives and inflicted a lot of damage, created a lot of wreckage. Support the show

I'm going to discuss with you the affordable housing model.  We think about people that are homeless, at or below the poverty line. That's the term that gets thrown around a lot. Well today I'm going to discuss with you and present to you the facts on why that model doesn't work today for the group that we're talking aboutSupport the show

I'm going to talk to you about for what I believe are simple, not so time consuming ways to increase our self awareness about the homelessness issue. In fact, as some of you know, and I mean if you turn on the news, turn on your, your phone, there's something being posted about the homeless. Support the show

This is my second official podcast around the homelessness crisis. Some people call it a crisis. Some people call it an epidemic. Some people are urging our president to declare a state of emergency in California where it's reached its beyond epidemic proportions. I'm gonna share with you some research that I've been doing over the last few weeks and even the last handful of months. The focus is gonna be on homelessness and loneliness. Support the show

I'm going to talk about something that is very near and dear to my heart, something I'm very passionate about and that is the homeless. For the last five years. I've been a volunteer, a blogger, an advocate along the ways I've shared with you about my own personal recovery.Support the show

This podcast is going to focus specifically on five ways that my family and friends have supported me in my recovery.Support the show

I'm recording this podcast on the evening of July 9, 2019. 5 days removed from our independence day, july 4th. The reason that date is of significance to me is that July 4, 2007 was a turning point in my life. The purpose of this podcast is to share with those out there that are struggling with their addiction and their alcoholism, and for the families that are watching them struggle. I'm gonna share with you from my perspective, three main reasons Why I was afraid and it took me a long time to get sober.Support the show

Have you ever found yourself in a relationship that has gone south? It just isn't working anymore. You're asking yourself that question, like the song, should I stay or should I go, or other questions like, why bother with this? Why doesn't the other person understand where I'm coming from or what have I done wrong or why does this always happen to me? Support the show

What I want to talk about today are some ways, four ways not only to deal with the anger, but to put ourselves in a position in terms of how to deal with it, but to not be there when it happens to protect ourselves, to seek safety because unfortunately in this world, sometimes we really feel and we feel it physically that we're in danger, we could feel physically threatened, emotionally threatened, spiritually threatened. Support the show

We're going to talk about another topic that a lot of people it gets talked about a lot. I'm not sure how it gets interpreted sometimes by outsiders, what's going on in the media, interpersonal relationships and that's anger. We all get angry at some point in our lives. Our day are weak. We may not show it and I'm here to tell you that. Support the show

 I want to talk about something that is near and dear to my heart and a part of my story and that is reasons Why people relapse. I've come up with three reasons that I want to touch on this week.Support the show

What I want to talk about today, we've talked about boundaries, the last few podcasts and this ties into it and these are defensive behaviors. I'm gonna focus on a few today in particular. There are many that I believe alienate us from others. When we get defensive, we turn we're coming from a place of fear versus love.Support the show

I wanna share with you a little bit more about what has come up for me in the past, because this is very challenging for many of us, whether we want to admit it or not. And I think it's a major source of our suffering and our misery when we're not able to set boundaries and just as important and even more important is to have the courage to maintain those boundaries and keep them in place. Support the show

What we're talking about again today, choosing a corrective experience. We talked about that last week. I called it part one, touched on a little bit about some of my fears and we touched on a few things and I'm gonna quickly highlight and then we'll get into the next part of this, which I'm gonna talk a little bit more today about boundaries. Support the show

What I want to talk about today is some of the things that I have done in the past applied used today and things that I am growing into in the future. So this podcast is gonna be the start of this discussion. It's going to be followed up with at least one more podcast because I think it warrants, its such a big topic in a touchy one.Support the show

 This message is crafted for those in early recovery that could be recovery from substance abuse, um mental health challenges, some other disorder, an eating disorder, um, or depression, it could be something, you know, a relationship that could be a number of things that we could consider ourselves in recovery. Support the show

 I'm gonna talk about emotional manipulation. Many of us have been subjected to this physically sexually, some form of trauma in our lives. Most of us. By the time we are adults have experienced one form of trauma, at least one form of it. It's very stressful, very difficult. Some of us have turned to substance abuse like myself, most of my trauma and stress was of the emotional nature and I think they're all linked together. Some have endured physical sexual abuse, very sorry about that. Support the show

This message is crafted for those in early recovery that could be recovery from substance abuse, um mental health challenges, some other disorder, an eating disorder, um, or depression, it could be something, you know, a relationship that could be a number of things that we could consider ourselves in recovery.Support the show

 I'm gonna talk about rejection today and how to handle rejection what I do on a daily basis because I believe a lot of this comes from beer. It comes from shame. Some people think it's just energy whose energy is it, is it my energy? Is it your energy? Is it our energy? Where does it come from? So I'm going to discuss that a little bit today. Again, it can be difficult. It can be challenging. We need real connection, intimacy with others. For me, as I've said before, it's my lifeline in recovery from alcoholism.Support the show

We're gonna talk a little bit about rejection. We make these efforts for connection and we feel rejected. And if we feel that rejection over and over again, I believe, and this is what happened to me. Our minds, my mind became conditioned to feeling I'm not enough, there's something wrong with me. They don't understand me that negative self talk that would build up and it became the norm for me, the status quo, if you will. Support the show

 I'm gonna talk about some more change today and some steps that I had to take a while I felt were necessary for me to recover from the disease of alcoholism that I have, and the shame that has carried with me for decades. Actually, believe it or not, you know, I went from a person running a very successful company for a number of years to a person that started to believe that they weren't enough and that they weren't lovable. And for a while it got the best of me and I became an alcoholic. Support the show

it sounds like a big key in in terms of working through shame, were there lies a lot of pain suffering we've had to endure. And in some cases we've chosen to indoor the suffering, as they say, pain is inevitable, suffering is optional. A big key for me. Working through that when I went through treatment the last time, as I've said before, I've been through it multiple times, was too get really honest and support group meetings. They say rigorous honesty. I've never had a lot of people call me a dishonest person or really get into my integrity, but then again, they only knew what they knew and what I told them. Support the show

What I want to talk about a little more today and a little more with a little more depth is we've talked about compassion and empathy and you know, for a while I lost it, I lost the ability to have access to that. Um I went through my version of a lot of stress. Some would call it trauma. Some people don't like that word. So you can call it a lot of stress. You can call it trauma, whatever works for you.Support the show

What I want to talk a little bit about today and I've written about this and some of the blogs is a little bit about relapse. My road to recovery. Relapse is a part of my story. I've been battling the disease of alcoholism for over a decade. Uh just to give you a little background, I went to multiple treatments. I had the best intention every time to want to abstain from alcohol. I didn't want it in my life. I began to recognize there were a lot of negative consequences if I continued to drink and I could get into all the different reasons we're gonna save that for another day because it's quite extensive into term in terms of why a person can relapse.Support the show

We're gonna talk a little bit about that to be okay with your, your thoughts and feelings and not judge ourselves. And as I said in the newsletter, we want to focus on you and a little self care. We can never have enough of that. I realized that I'm at my best when I'm taking care of myself and when I say that my best taking care of myself and and being of service to others. Being all in on a conversation, I don't know if you notice it, but you know, you pass cross paths with people, you run into people, you start having a conversation and the other person just kind of goes off and you get more than maybe you bargained for and you patiently smile and listen knowing that it's okay to feel that way.Support the show

We're going to talk about something that is quite complex in the treatment and recovery communities. We're gonna talk about co occurring disorders or also referred to as dual diagnosis. It's basically defined as a person that has one or more substance abuse disorder, an addiction and one or more mental health disorder, a mental health challenge or illness. And unfortunately there are those that are out there that are even less fortunate that are also homeless.Support the show

We're gonna talk about your loved ones, friends, family members, and people that you're very concerned about. That could be struggling with potential mental health issues, addiction or both. And whether or not you really believe that day want help, that they think they need help because denial can certainly be a part of this process and it is a process I to them in recovery and would like to share some of my thoughts so that you can support them unconditionally the best way possible and encourage them because a lot of positive reinforcement throughout this process and it can be long and painful at times.Support the show