Taking Life by the Raines Season 1

You think you know me. You don't know this version. In Episode 5 I finally brought on my first guest, my childhood best friend Alexa, the one person on earth who has seen me through literally every season. The bratty middle schooler. The wild high schooler. The girl who should have ended up dead or pregnant but somehow didn't. The woman who couldn't accept a compliment. And the mom and wife I've become today. This one is unscripted, unfiltered, and honestly hilarious. We're telling the stories I have never told. Sneaking to Missouri in the middle of the night and telling our parents we were at Cedar Point. Getting caught by a cop with an expired license at a party and somehow walking away free. The high school sorority that absolutely should not have existed. The things we were numbing and why. The moment Alexa looked at me across a table and thought, "she's not the same girl anymore". And the most important part. The conversation at the end where she tells me what she is most proud of me for. I could not make it through that without crying. If you have a childhood best friend who has seen the full version of you (the one you don't post on social media) this episode is going to hit home. Tag them below. 💜 New episodes every week. Subscribe so you never miss one. 📲 Follow Taking Life by the Raines: Instagram: instagram.com/takinglifebytheraines/ TikTok: tiktok.com/takinglifebythera Facebook: facebook.com/takinglifebytheraines/ 📲 Follow Brandi: Instagram: instagram.com/brandirainesbeauty/ TikTok: tiktok.com/brandirainesbeauty Facebook: facebook.com/followbrandiraines/ About me + my links: msha.ke/brandirainesbeauty_ Shop my Komigo storefront: komigo.me/brandi 🎧 Listen on Spotify and Apple Podcasts: takinglifebytheraines.com 0:00 Cold open — "I should have ended up dead or pregnant" 1:03 Welcome — meet Alexa Rex, Brandi's childhood best friend 2:50 What it means to have a friend who has seen every season of your life 3:58 First question: what was I actually like? 4:47 How they met — competitive dance team in fifth grade 6:04 Dance was their home away from home — chaotic backgrounds 7:16 How they became close — Katelyn, parties, and dating brothers 8:23 Alexa's honest take — "you were a brat, disrespectful to everyone" 9:49 Christians who have done dark things — faith without a perfect past 12:21 The Missouri road trip — lying to their parents about Cedar Point 16:33 Getting caught — parents compare stories, the lie unravels 18:38 High school parties, bonding over chaotic home lives 20:06 The high school sorority that absolutely should not have existed 21:40 "I should have ended up dead or pregnant" — the party bus years 22:59 Being taken advantage of at a freshman year party 24:04 Numbing everything — what we were really running from 25:18 Close calls — guns, cops, expired licenses, and walking away 27:56 After high school — Brandi moves to Disney, the friendship ebbs 29:19 What Brandi was struggling with that she didn't even realize 30:28 Dark times Alexa witnessed — the real picture from the outside 32:08 The proud moment — Brandi leaves Michigan for Florida 32:59 When Alexa knew — meeting Casey changed everything 34:44 Numbing vs. healing — then and now 58:01 You don't have to be embarrassed — let go of the guilt and shame 59:53 Change is possible — even when people don't believe you yet 1:00:12 Last question — what are you most proud of me for? 1:00:41 "The mom that you are" — both of them cry 1:02:46 Friendships that point you to Jesus — the ones that matter 1:04:32 Dark humor, fond memories, and closing laughs 1:05:11 Closing — "go hug your childhood bestie" childhood best friend podcast | growing up wild and surviving | women friendship podcast | personal growth story | faith and friendship | Brandi Raines podcast | Taking Life by the Raines | Christian women podcast | millennial mom friendship | real talk women #takinglifebytheraines #brandiraines #bestfriendpodcast #childhoodfriendship #womenempowerment #christianwomen #millennialmom #realtalk #faithjourney #personalgrowth

Here is something I don't think people expect me to say. It took me 14 years to actually feel confident. Like genuinely, deeply, not-faking-it confident. The girl you see on social media selling makeup, running a beauty empire, coaching thousands of women? She spent most of her life deeply insecure about her looks, her capability, and her money. She faked confidence so hard that it came across as obnoxious. And she spent years comparing herself to everyone around her while quietly falling apart inside. In Episode 4 I am getting into all of it. How comparison steals your confidence before you even realize it is happening. How growing up Filipino in a predominantly white small town in Michigan left me feeling like the sore thumb in every room I walked into. How a comment about my love handles in middle school sent me to get lipo as an adult. How I spent the early years of motherhood sobbing over my baby's milestones because I was too busy comparing myself to every other mom around me. And the three seasons of my life where I finally proved to myself that I was capable of more than where I came from. Confidence is not something you are born with. It is not linked to money or status or a perfect body. It is something you build. And I am going to show you how. New episodes every week. Subscribe 💜 📲 Follow Taking Life by the Raines: Instagram: instagram.com/takinglifebytheraines/ TikTok: tiktok.com/takinglifebythera Facebook: facebook.com/takinglifebytheraines/ 📲 Follow Brandi: Instagram: instagram.com/brandirainesbeauty/ TikTok: tiktok.com/brandirainesbeauty Facebook: facebook.com/followbrandiraines/ About me + my links: msha.ke/brandirainesbeauty_ Shop my Komigo storefront: komigo.me/brandi 🎧 Listen on Spotify and Apple Podcasts: takinglifebytheraines.com 0:00 Welcome — diving into confidence after 14 years of building it 0:27 What confidence actually is — not what social media says it is 1:36 Why she's sharing her insecurities — so you can see yourself 2:42 The one thing that stops women from finding success 3:46 Her biggest insecurity growing up — her looks 4:23 Growing up Filipino in Michigan — looking different from everyone 5:56 Third grade gym class — the "Chinese eyes" moment that stuck 7:28 The weight insecurity — Hollister jeans, love handles, and competitive dance 9:15 How a childhood insecurity led to lipo as an adult 10:31 Insecurity 2 — capability: believing where I came from was the ceiling 12:00 Insecurity 3 — finances and hiding past-due bills as a kid 14:31 What fake confidence looks like from the outside 16:20 Comparison — the thief of joy and creator of false reality 16:49 Her love-hate relationship with social media 18:08 Comparing herself to other moms — the beach condo story 19:30 Hudson's milestones vs. her niece — sobbing over a baby who couldn't sit up 23:23 Goals set from comparison not calling — retiring Casey before he wanted it 27:08 Confidence does not come from other people's perception of you 28:25 Motivation vs. discipline — what actually builds confidence over time 30:27 Fixate on what God has for you — stop the hamster wheel of comparison 31:31 Three seasons that proved she was capable — turning points 32:30 Season 1 — moving to Florida in 2011 with $2,000 and a prayer 35:02 Season 2 — meeting Casey and breaking the generational mold 37:00 Season 3 — 2020, the pandemic, and her business going 10x 40:07 U-Haul to Georgia — laying on a mattress and feeling proud 41:31 When her confidence finally stopped being a performance 43:37 Teaching her kids — don't ask if they like you, ask how you feel 44:35 Confidence is not born, it is built — and it comes in seasons 45:31 Confidence grows with faith — actionable steps to get there 46:54 Closing — it is never too late to blossom into what God is calling you how to build confidence | comparison and insecurity | confidence for women | self esteem podcast | personal growth women | stop comparing yourself | women empowerment podcast | Christian women podcast | millennial mom podcast | social media and confidence #takinglifebytheraines #brandiraines #confidence #selfesteem #stopcomparing #womenempowerment #christianwomen #millennialmom #personalgrowth #faithjourney

Here's the truth. Nobody tells you that healing gets worse before it gets better. Like actually worse. You start digging, you start going to therapy, you start facing the things you've tucked away for years and for a minute it feels like everything is falling apart. That's not you doing it wrong. That is literally just how it works. In Episode 3 I'm getting into the stuff the self-help books skip over. The real, messy, uncomfortable truth about what healing actually looks like. I'm talking about learning to lower your expectations for people who have proven they're not capable of meeting them. I'm talking about staying put during hard conversations when every part of you wants to run. About outgrowing friendships you never thought you'd lose. About forgiving people who never said sorry. And about why your triggers in your marriage today are almost always rooted in something that happened when you were a kid. I share the moment in couples therapy that broke my heart and then put it back together. The story of my dad running after our car at McDonald's when I was four years old. What my therapist showed me about my body language and why it was making my husband feel like he didn't matter to me. And how I had to stop praying for healing and start actually participating in it. This episode is for anyone in the middle of it. The hard, unglamorous middle of doing the work. I promise you it's worth it. The healed version of you is going to look back at the younger version of you and say, we did it. 💜 New episodes every week. Subscribe so you never miss one. 📲 Follow Taking Life by the Raines: Instagram: instagram.com/takinglifebytheraines/ TikTok: tiktok.com/takinglifebythera Facebook: facebook.com/takinglifebytheraines/ 📲 Follow Brandi: Instagram: instagram.com/brandirainesbeauty/ TikTok: tiktok.com/brandirainesbeauty Facebook: facebook.com/followbrandiraines/ About me + my links: msha.ke/brandirainesbeauty_ Shop my Komigo storefront: komigo.me/brandi 🎧 Listen on Spotify and Apple Podcasts: www.takinglifebytheraines.com 0:00 Welcome back — Episode 3 intro 0:26 The truth about healing nobody talks about 1:47 It gets worse before it gets better — and that's okay 3:13 Healing is like peeling an onion — layer by layer 4:42 The first step she took — reading her Bible and starting therapy 5:12 The wrong therapist — and why you need to vet yours 6:21 Starting couples therapy with Casey 7:06 The therapist said: you each need to heal separately first 7:36 The biggest lesson from therapy — expectations 9:27 Lowering your expectations for broken people 11:02 Find a spicy marriage counselor who tells you the truth 11:43 If your marriage isn't hard, you're not going deep enough 14:26 The therapy session that broke her heart — the trash story 19:48 Body language as a trauma response 22:16 Learning to stay put when you want to run 23:11 The McDonald's memory — age 4, her parents divorced 25:40 What healing actually looks like step by step 28:04 Stop praying for healing and start participating in it 29:16 Friendships have expiration dates 30:37 Trauma bonding friendships and what happens when you heal 32:07 Daddy issues — forgiving what you never had 36:32 Therapy gives you the tools — real life is where you use them 37:31 Grieving friendships that no longer serve you 38:07 Forgiveness is a part of every layer of healing 40:10 Forgiving without an apology — how to actually do it 42:05 How to have hard conversations and keep the friendship 44:22 What healthy boundaries actually look like in real life 45:46 You teach people how to treat you 47:21 If your friends talk badly about their spouse, that is the enemy 49:11 The healed version of you is going to look back and say well done 50:07 Where to start if you don't know how to begin healing 53:42 Healing your trauma is the best weapon against the enemy 54:40 Thank you and closing healing gets worse before it gets better | childhood trauma therapy | toxic friendships | marriage counseling | forgiveness healing | personal growth podcast women | Christian healing | generational trauma #takinglifebytheraines #brandiraines #healingjourney #childhoodtrauma #marriagecounseling #toxicfriendships #christianwomen #millennialmom #personalgrowth #faithjourney Powered by ATL Podcast Pros https://atlpodcastpros.com

Here's the reality. When you grow up in chaos, you learn to survive it. And those survival skills, the armor, the walls, the need to control everything, they don't just disappear when you become an adult. They follow you. Into your marriage. Into your parenting. Into your work. Into every single relationship you try to build. I spent years not knowing that the patterns I was running on were directly connected to what I lived through as a kid. No hot water. Moving every year. Hiding past-due bills in the mailbox. A house in 10th grade with two mattresses on the floor and no fridge. I thought that was just life. I didn't realize until way later that I had built a whole personality around surviving it. In this episode I'm getting into the stuff I didn't talk about in Episode 1. Not just what happened, but what it did to me on the inside. Why I couldn't accept a compliment. Why I hit $15 million in sales and still felt like it wasn't enough. Why I was a workaholic and calling it a badge of honor when honestly, it was a trauma response. Why I pushed away the people who loved me the most. God has been so faithful in my healing. Truly. But I also had to do the work, and I want to help you do it too. You are not alone if you came from chaos. And it does not dictate where you're going. I promise you that.   New episodes every week. Subscribe so you never miss one. 💜   📲 Follow Taking Life by the Raines: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/takinglifebytheraines/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/takinglifebythera Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/takinglifebytheraines/ 📲 Follow Brandi: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/brandirainesbeauty/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/brandirainesbeauty Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/followbrandiraines/ About me + my links: msha.ke/brandirainesbeauty_ Shop my Komigo storefront: komigo.me/brandi   🎧 Listen on Spotify & Apple Podcasts: takinglifebytheraines.com   In this episode: How growing up in chaos creates toxic patterns in adulthood Why being a workaholic is actually a trauma response My scarcity mindset with money and how I rewired it The "closet clubhouse" I built as a child just to feel safe Why I could never accept compliments or celebrate my own success How childhood wounds affect marriage, friendships, and parenting Breaking generational patterns, because the buck stops here What therapy taught me and what you can do without it childhood trauma healing | trauma response workaholic | overcoming childhood wounds | generational patterns | personal growth podcast for women | faith and healing | scarcity mindset money | women empowerment podcast #takinglifebytheraines #brandiraines #childhoodtrauma #traumahealing #personalgrowth #womenempowerment #christianwomen #millennialmom #selfimprovement #generationaltrauma   Powered by ATL Podcast Pros https://atlpodcastpros.com

Welcome to Taking Life by the Raines — I'm Brandi Raines, and this is Episode 1.   Before the multi-million dollar business, the team of 6,000 women, and the life you see today — there was a little girl from Port Huron, Michigan who knew what it felt like to not have hot water, watch the furniture get repossessed, and parent herself through high school.   In this episode, I'm pulling back the curtain and sharing the real story of what made me — from an Army brat childhood and two divorces to dancing at Disney World, building a beauty empire from a $2,000 Pell Grant, and the one conversation that changed how I treated people forever.   This is the foundation. The rice in the bowl before all the toppings. In this episode: • Growing up moving every year & learning to go without • The 8th grade summer that changed everything • Going from Michigan to Disney World with $2,000 • The friend who told me the truth about myself • Meeting Casey & the May 2017 decision that changed our lives • Why God uses your hardest seasons to prepare you for your biggest blessings   If you've ever felt like your past should have held you back — this episode is for you. 0:00 Welcome to Taking Life by the Raines 1:25 What this podcast is really about 3:48 Growing up in Port Huron, Michigan 5:35 Army brat childhood & parents' divorce 6:20 The 8th grade summer that changed everything 8:48 Going to school with kids who had money 12:36 Betrayal, a Pell Grant & leaving Michigan 15:21 Auditioning at Disney World 19:03 The friend who told me the hard truth (Brian) 26:12 Standing up and apologizing to everyone 33:47 May 2017 — the decision that changed everything 37:21 Meeting Casey & building a life together 40:40 Why God uses your hardest seasons 43:06 The challenge for you & what's coming next   Subscribe for new episodes every week. 📲 Follow Taking Life by the Raines: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/takinglifebytheraines/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/takinglifebythera Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/takinglifebytheraines/   📲 Follow Brandi: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/brandirainesbeauty/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/brandirainesbeauty Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/followbrandiraines/ About me + my links: msha.ke/brandirainesbeauty_ Shop my Komigo storefront: komigo.me/brandi   female entrepreneur podcast | personal growth podcast | women empowerment | faith and business | motherhood podcast | overcoming trauma | self improvement | life stories #TakingLifeByTheRaines #BrandiRaines #WomenEntrepreneurs #PersonalGrowth #OvercomingTrauma #FaithAndBusiness #MomBoss #FromNothingToSomething #PodcastForWomen #MotivationalStories #SelfImprovement #femalefounder   Powered by ATL Podcast Pros https://atlpodcastpros.com