PODCAST · religion
The Living Marriages Podcast | Effective Communication, Intimacy, Healthy Habits, Christian Counseling, Christian Parenting
by Aaron Au, April Au | Marriage Coaching and Mentoring
The Go-To Podcast for Those Who Want To Rebuild Intimacy and Connection in Their Christ Centered MarriageHas the excitement of your wedding day now faded into the background? Are you so exhausted that the last thing you want to think about is your marriage?Do you and your spouse feel like ships passing in the night?If you’re craving the intimate, connected marriage God has for you, you’ve come to the right place!We’re April and Aaron Au, marriage coaches with over a decade of experience, who are on the journey to finding God’s best for our marriage while raising two young boys.We recently heard this wisdom: “If your marriage isn’t growing, it’s dying.” Yikes! That really got our attention! But if you think about it, it’s true. Marriages need direction, purpose and a common vision to thrive. If they don’t, they will inevitably drift apart. When you add the pressures of raising young children and the grind of daily work to the mix, there are even more forces that threaten to pull o
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It Takes A Village: Why Every Believer Must Pray for the Next Generation
Whether you are parents or not, God has placed children in your life. While parents are the primary disciplers of their children, God has also given those children a community of adults who can model faith and speak God's love and wisdom into their lives. The question God is inviting us to consider in this episode is: are you praying for those children? Whether for your own kids or someone else's, are you interceding for them to know God's love, grace and goodness? In this conversation we share: Our own struggles with our youngest child and how that has led us into more intentional prayer The importance of a weekly marriage meeting whether you have kids or not The important call God has given us to be praying for the next generation of disciples and leaders Resources Here is an academic paper demonstrating the effectiveness of students having mentors. Among the findings: "Students with mentors were significantly less depressed, more satisfied, and more committed to their faith than students without mentors." Our episode on what makes for an effective weekly "marriage meeting." A wonderful guide to weekly marriage meetings from FamilyLife Canada. A Prayer For Your Child's Emotions by Kaylene Yoder Lord, I pray You would bestow on my children a crown of beauty instead of ashes. Anoint them with Your oil of gladness in the midst of mourning. And clothe them in garments of praise so they may be guarded against falling into despair (Isaiah 61:3). Renew my children’s hearts and minds and empower them to overcome any negative emotional behaviors. In Jesus’ name, Amen. Get in Touch We'd love to hear about how you pray for your children or the children in your life! Have any prayers you'd like to share with us? Get in touch: [email protected]
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How "Magical Questions" Will Help You Overcome Differences and Strengthen Connection
We live in such a divided world today that even family gatherings can be incredible sources of tensions. What can we talk about without somebody exploding? How can we ever truly connect, so that we can know others and be known? If you are feeling that tension in some of your relationships or even in your marriage, this conversation is for you! What if curiosity could help us lower the tension? What if there are questions we can ask that will build connection with everyone in the room? Author Priya Parker has developed something she terms "magical questions", questions that "are good for a group when it’s both interesting to each person to answer and each person would be curious to hear everyone else’s response." In this episode, we explore the power God gives us through the art of asking questions to help us both overcome differences and strengthen connection, both in our marriages and other important relationships. Resources Find out more about Priya Parker and her magical questions here and here. Get In Touch! We'd love to hear your response to our magical question to you! We'd also love to hear any other magical questions you've discovered work well in your marriage or other relationships. E-mail us: [email protected]
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Gain Control over Your Finances Together with God
For many of us, finances cause us a lot of grief and confusion or even worse, it can lead to bitterness and strife in our marriages. Often that stress comes from "clutter" in our finances, e.g. not understanding how much is coming in or going out, what is important to us or our spouse. In this episode, we heed God's invitation to begin to declutter our finances by: admitting we need help having a conversation with our spouse about what are important expenses to us beginning to track what's coming in and what's going out seeking good resources and wise people Resources Our friends at Rise Above Finance can help you gain clarity on your financial picture and teach you what stewardship means and looks like practically: https://www.riseabovefinance.com/ For a great read on achieving financial freedom and eternal impact together with God, check out Bob and Linda Lotich's book, Simple Money, Rich Life. The first copy of your book is free (apart from shipping and handling!) Click here.
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Finding Space For What's Important In Your Marriage
We had the best of intentions. A wonderful anniversary trip away. Time spent with each other and the Lord visioning what he was calling our family to. We were so excited to implement our family vision as soon as we got home! And then we came home to the clutter and the chaos. We've been struggling to implement our vision since so we decided we need to start by decluttering first. Note: This episode still includes clean and organized people! Your clutter might just be different than ours but it might still be there. It could be mental, emotional, spiritual and/or physical. If you have clutter, God has something to say about it! Like, what would our lives look like if we removed the things that distract us from those of "most value"? Join us for an eye-opening, challenging and ultimately encouraging conversation! Resources To find Joshua Becker's latest book, "Uncluttered Faith," click here. Next Steps Get in touch if you'd like prayer, encouragement or if you have guest or episode ideas! [email protected]
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Step Out Of Drama! The Drama Triangle and Boundaries
Drama. Even as God's image-bearers, drama is a reality of our fallen human experience. Often within our marriages and our families, we step into drama in one of three ways: as the victim, persecutor or rescuer. We can often cycle through these different roles in our family systems or even in our own perspectives. As we continue to cycle through these roles, we continue to live in drama. Thankfully, God has a better way for us to live other than in drama. In this episode we talk about God's invitation for us to step out of drama by becoming aware of our role in the drama and when necessary, by setting boundaries. It's not an easy journey but with God's grace and the support of others, it is possible! Resources For a diagram of the Drama Triangle, click here. For support and prayer to step out of drama, please connect with us! We'd love to pray with you and if we're able, to recommend supports and resources for you. [email protected] Other Episodes For our conversation with Katie Skurja of Imago Dei Ministries, click here. Find the episodes with JB and Erin Crocker here.
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3 Ways Worship Transforms Your Marriage and Family
In Nehemiah 12, we see God's people gather to celebrate God's goodness and faithfulness to his people through a difficult time in their history. We also see God giving us a blueprint for how worship in song matters and can transform our marriages families. In worship: God reminds us that our story is a part of his bigger story God renews our minds and our relationships God invites us to rejoice beyond our circumstances We've been trying to begin a practice of worship as a family and though we're only getting started, it's been a beautiful thing to experience so far. How is God inviting you and your family to begin worshipping him together? Resources You can check out Aaron's sermon on Nehemiah 12 here. Questions? Episode ideas? Want prayer? Please get in touch with us. We'd love to hear from you! [email protected]
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It's Never Too Late to Have The Marriage You Desire: Following God Into His Vision For Your Family
A recent conversation with a stranger with grown kids got us thinking about the direction our family and our marriage are going. We've only got so much time with our kids at home to disciple them and model for them the values we feel God calling us to. How are we doing? In this conversation we talk about: Why today is the day to start making decisions about your family's directions and why it's never too late to start What are the things that your family and your marriage values? Is God calling you to more? What are some small changes to our direction we can make so we'll arrive at the destination we want? Get in touch and let us know how we can be praying for you and cheering you on! [email protected] Resources We've been really enjoying these books lately and will have more to say on each of them soon! Dopamine Kids by Michaeleen Doucleff Raising Amazing by Monica Swanson The Brain That Changes Itself by Norman Doidge
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Best of: Is God at the Centre of Your Marriage? with Dr. John Littlejohn
We are away this week celebrating our 15th anniversary so we wanted to share one of our favourite episodes from the Living Marriages archive...our first conversation with Dr. John Littlejohn. We'll be back with fresh content next week. Enjoy! Have you wondered what people mean when they say they want Christ "at the centre" of their marriage? What does it look like to hear the voice of God in our marriage, together and as individuals? In today's episode, we are so excited to welcome our first-ever guest, Dr. John "Adidam" Littlejohn! A deeply loved pastor and internationally recognized musician, John explores with us in this fun and in-depth conversation, questions like: If God desires to speak to us, how do we hear God's voice in our marriage? If God is at the centre of our marriage, how do we keep moving towards him, no matter where we're coming from? Does God have a vision for our marriage? We were so incredibly blessed and challenged by our conversation with John and we pray you will be too! Find out more about John here: https://www.adidammusic.com https://www.instagram.com/adidammusic/ https://www.infinitusmusic.com https://www.thekingdomlife.ca Connect with us: [email protected] www.livingmarriages.com
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When God Speaks Through Dollar Store Receipts...
Have you ever gone through times when you've felt distant from God; when it feels like he isn't present? Or maybe you're so consumed by the current struggle that you don't even have the mental or emotional capacity to remember his goodness and faithfulness in times past. It is so easy to forget that the God that we serve is with us in the midst of it all; loving us. Sometimes he even surprises us with the goodness of that love. Recently, our family experienced a gift of God's surprising love as we grieved the passing of my (April's) dad. In his love and grace, God reached through the fog we were in and reminded us of his presence with us as our Good Shepherd, even in the midst of our overwhelm and sorrow. We were so impacted by this outpouring of God's love, and wanted to bring glory to him through sharing it, so here it is. We pray it brings you hope and encouragement as we're reminded of the God who loves and cares for us.
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From Surviving to Thriving: The Raabsmiths' Journey Through Sexual Betrayal to Lasting Intimacy
Early on in their marriage, Matthew and Joanna Raabsmith thought they would help others in their marriage. They were both in seminary receiving excellent training, they both had a heart to help others. Little did they know that even though they would help others in their marriage, God needed to do a deep work in their marriage first. It began by confronting the lie that was at the centre of their marriage - Matthew's hidden pornography addiction. It led to a painful yet ultimately freeing disclosure; it continued with a difficult yet fruitful journey of ongoing recovery and rebuilding. Betrayal trauma was a new term in their day and now God has used the Raabsmith's journey to help others not just recover from betrayal but to thrive in a marriage built on trust and lasting intimacy. Resources You can find out more about Joanna and Matthew's ministry, book, coaching and other resources by clicking here.
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Is Your Marriage Lacking Fun? Here's How to Get it Back!
Routine is good. In fact, our family tends to thrive on routine! However, making space for adventure and spontaneity is also good. In fact, we'd say it's an essential part of being human. If we are made in the image of God and he is creative, we need space for fun and creativity as well. We know...it takes effort to be spontaneous and energy to seek playfulness and adventure. But the payoff for your marriage and family will be tremendous. Will you join us in seeking God's fun and adventure for our marriages and families? Resources Here is a link to the book we mentioned: Creative Love by Jeremy and Audrey Roloff If you have questions or would like some prayer, we'd love to hear from you. And if you have ideas for some fun and spontaneous adventures, please drop us a line! [email protected]
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How Jesus Transformed Our Lives and Our Marriage with Ian and Courtney Hogaboam
After tragedy struck their family, Ian and Courtney Hogaboam heard from God. It started with a recurring dream for Courtney and it ended up with Jesus becoming the centre of their lives and their marriage. Since then, Ian and Courtney have become dear friends, regular listeners of the Living Marriages Podcast and marriage mentees. In our conversation, we discover: How Jesus sought them out in difficult times in their lives The difference Jesus has made in their lives and in their family The benefits of marriage mentoring What their six-year-old thinks marriage is really about Resources Want to get connected with marriage mentors? Find out if your church has a mentoring program or contact us: [email protected] You can also check out FamilyLife Canada's website (if you're in Canada) for some online mentoring. https://familylifecanada.com/mentoring
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Why Won't He (or She) Listen? When Communication Breaks Down
Assertiveness, Assumptions, Aggression: only one of these things is healthy in a marriage (hint: it's the first one!) Assertiveness is critical for any marriage as it allows us to be seen and heard and it rescues us from assumptions. However, it does not come easy for many of us though, owing to past wounding, personality type or even an unsafe space to express ourselves in marriage. For others, assertiveness comes easily but often it can come with aggression and defensiveness creating that unsafe space. What's God's hope for couples who find themselves trapped in either of these extremes of assertiveness? In this conversation we explore: our fundamental need as humans to be seen and known by others the critical importance of assertiveness in a marriage why some people get nervous at the word "assertiveness" and how to overcome that why others pair aggression with assertiveness and how to move past that the importance of using "I want..." statements and responding with open-ended questions Resources and Next Steps If you'd like help finding hope and healing in these areas or a community to walk with in this, please get in touch with us: [email protected] We'd love to pray with you and see if we can connect you with some resources and community to help you along your journey with God and each other.
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How Differences Can Destroy or Strengthen Your Marriage
In the hands of the enemy, differences can be used to drive our marriages and families apart. But in the hands of the Holy Spirit joined with curious and humble hearts, differences can truly strengthen a marriage. In this episode you'll hear about: How assumptions can kill your relationship The 80/20 rule when it comes to understanding gender differences The critical importance of curiosity in your marriage The dangers couples who are more similar face Resources Strengths Based Marriage Book by Jimmy Evans and Allan Kelsey Open-ended questions to ask one another: "What is your greatest need in our marriage?" "Is there any way I hurt you this past week?" "Was there a way in which I blessed you this past week?" "How can I pray for you this coming week?"
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Jesus Said What About Money??? Help and Hope from Luke 16
Sex and finances are the two topics that we seem to find ourselves coming back to often because they are two of the largest stress points in any marriage. On this episode, we talk about: Our journey with money and learning what "mammon" is Exploring Jesus' puzzling parable on money from Luke 16 Learning to see money as a tool for the kingdom that is to be leveraged Learning to trust God as our Good Shepherd in whom we "lack nothing" Resources Read Luke 16 here. Find our conversation with Bob and Linda Lotich of SeedTime here. Next Steps We'd love to hear from you and have the chance to pray with you! Get in touch: [email protected]
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"A Good Marriage Doesn't Just Happen": The Case for Mentoring
Research has shown that it can take couples between 2 and 6 years to finally reach out for help from the time they realize they're having trouble in their marriage. We've got one question: why wait so long? On today's episode we discuss: the benefits of marriage mentoring and why getting ahead of the problem is healthy the shame and pressure couples feel when they are having issues that may prevent them from seeking help why God never meant for us to do our marriages alone Interested in being mentored or becoming a mentor? The best place is to find someone in your community of faith. FamilyLife, who we work with, provides training for churches to start their own marriage mentoring ministries. For more information in Canada, please visit: https://familylifecanada.com/mentoring In the US, please visit: https://www.familylife.com/equip/compassionate-mentoring/ Or please get in touch with us with your questions or prayer requests! [email protected] We'd love to hear from you!
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What "Biblical Marriage" Is and Is Not with Dana Che
We're so excited to be joined by a new friend, author and marriage coach Dana Che. In this wide-ranging conversation we talk about: her story of how God raised her up as a marriage coach after infidelity in her marriage what a "biblical marriage" is and is not the new book that God laid on her heart and how it's been helping couples encounter him and one another what hope there is for couples going through "the long middle" For more information about Dana Che, her coaching offerings and podcast, please visit danache.com To order her new book "Tried and True: Marriage Advice from 12 Imperfect Biblical Couples" US listeners click here Canadian listeners click here Next steps If you'd like to get a hold of us for prayer, encouragement or even with episode ideas, we'd love to hear from you: [email protected]
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Feeling the Squeeze? Grief and Hope for the Sandwich Generation
Trigger warning: In this episode we share about the loss of a parent. With increased life expectancy and older first-time parents, the so-called "Sandwich Generation" - people having to care for both young children and aging or ill parents - is growing. Being a part of this generation of care-givers, we have experienced the tremendous pressure and complexity this creates. On today's episode we share: our own journey through grief and challenge in walking with a parent suffering from Parkinson's disease and dementia and the death of that parent the challenges and opportunities of raising young children through this journey the importance of having your marriage as a safe place during this seasons We also take time to pray for all who are facing similar pressures and challenges, whatever this season of marriage is bringing you. Next Steps If you'd like prayer or to share your story, we'd love to be able to pray with and support you. Please get in touch: [email protected]
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Best of: How "Small Things Often" Can Impact Your Marriage For A Lifetime
I confess! I (Aaron) love big, radical things! I'm always looking for the "next big idea" that will change our lives and our marriages, the "silver bullet" or "magic formula" that will bring dramatic transformation. However, while we should not discount the big things, I've been learning the ways in which God is inviting us to discover and invest in the small things. When these are done often, with intentionality and care, they will make a big difference in our marriage. In this episode: We talk about how "small things" is a kingdom principal that applies to our marriages We explore the concept of "bids" in relationships as put forward by Dr. John Gottman We invite you to find the small things that are already happening often in your marriage and discuss where they aren't happening Resources A study from Penn State on how the small things make us feel loved: https://www.psu.edu/news/research/story/love-actually-americans-agree-what-makes-people-feel-love An article from the Gottman Institute on "bids" in relationship: https://www.gottman.com/blog/marriage-not-big-thing-million-little-things/? A fun blog from the Gottman Institute on some of the small things couples do for each other: https://www.gottman.com/blog/small-things-often-ingredients-happy-relationship/ Want to share with us some of the small things you do often for each other? Send us a note! [email protected]
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Best of: Honeymoon Habits That Will Transform Your Marriage with Braden and Kristen Hafner
Difference and Drift. These 2 things can be subtle but deadly for our marriages. Have you discovered some differences with your spouse that have left you discouraged? Do you find yourself drifting further and further apart from your partner? We're so excited to share our conversation with Braden and Kristin Hafner of Family Life Canada about God's hope for our marriages! On this episode you'll hear: Why marriage matters to God and us How differences and drift can sabotage our marriages How there is hope and healing in Christ for our marriages How the small habits can really bring transformation If you'd like to find out more about Braden and Kristin's work with Family Life Canada (including more information about the weekend getaways) please click here: https://www.familylifecanada.com/ What are some "honeymoon habits" that you and your spouse enjoy? Let us know! [email protected]
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Best of: Why Intimacy Goes Beyond the Bedroom in Marriage
When we use the word "intimacy," our culture (and even our churches) have conditioned us to think of what happens in the bedroom, of sexual intimacy. While sexual intimacy is an integral part of marriage, it is not the full picture of what God has created us for and invited us into. There is so much more to intimacy and today's episode is meant to get the conversation going on what intimacy in marriage can look like beyond the bedroom. According to Eric Erickson, intimacy is the potential someone has for connectedness and it hinges on 3 things: Commitment Vulnerability Communication Two important questions we ask about intimacy in marriage: Is it safe to love? Is it safe to be loved? Resources: This is a bit of a technical paper (but still very approachable) and is a good look at Erickson's ideas on intimacy: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC2733523/#:~:text=As%20such%2C%20Erikson%20emphasized%20three,communicate%20inner%20thoughts%20and%20feelings. A link to Henri Nouwen's essays on Intimacy: https://archive.org/details/intimacyessaysin0000nouw Have questions or need prayer? Get in touch with us: [email protected]
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Best Of: Overcoming Shame with Grace in Your Marriage with Katie Skurja
This is a first for the Living Marriages Podcast - a rebroadcast of one of our and your favourite episodes! Be encouraged as we re-visit this conversation with our good friend and mentor, Katie Skurja. ------ "Shame is the most powerful force on the planet, apart from grace." Katie Skurja, founder of Imago Dei Ministries, is an internationally recognized inner healing practitioner, spiritual director and marriage counsellor. We were thrilled and honoured that she could join us in this conversation exploring the devastating power of shame in our marriages and the joy and freedom available in Christ's healing work. Topics we explore include: What are "shadow vows" and why every couple should do them God's grace that is available for us to turn into and confront our shame rather than hide it How, as image bearers of God, we are like "Peanut M&Ms" When we understand the paradoxes of God, we understand ourselves and our spouses better What the drama triangle is and how it threatens our marriages Resources: For Katie's incredible conversation with children regarding the image of God and "Peanut M&M's", check out this video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hVTBnl5iEEg&t=310s An excellent article on the "Drama Triangle": https://www.idmin.org/_files/ugd/0d9c11_b989426836064bd3a9dfdfe15fe4e382.pdf Where to find Katie, her resources and courses: Imago Dei Ministries - https://www.idmin.org Companying Center - https://www.companioningcenter.org Let us know what you think of this conversation! Contact April and Aaron at [email protected]
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An Important Update to the Living Marriages Podcast
Greetings friends! When we began the Living Marriages podcast over a year ago, we could never have imagined what a wonderful ride God was inviting us to - one filled with inspiring interviews, challenging conversations and the incredible opportunity to get to know some of you, our listeners. We felt called from the beginning to offer 2 episodes a week (outside of once-a-week summer episodes) and we soon settled into a rhythm of Tuesday conversations and Thursday reflections and prayers. Well, God moves us into new seasons and it feels like a new season has arrived for us! As our work with FamilyLife Canada is ramping up and our need for rest becoming more evident, we're making some changes to the podcast. This is our last Thursday Thought episode as we transition to one weekly episode. We will still have times for prayer and reflection in our main episode and offer, from time to time a bonus episode in case it feels like God is calling us to extra reflection and prayer. Thank you for sticking with us as we walk into a new season together with God and each other!
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Thief of Joy: Busyness and Why God's Call to Sabbath Still Matters
Are you feeling hurried, busy beyond what you thought was possible, stripped of joy? Our culture has a solution for you - buy this bathrobe or three of these candles or this SUV to take you to the mountains so you can find the rest you so desperately want and need. They have one thing right - we need this rest! But here's what they have wrong - you don't need to buy it. God offers it to you. It's on the first page of the Bible! Join us for this conversation where we explore: What Sabbath truly is What it means to "work from rest" rather than "rest from work" Why God's heart for Sabbath rest for us today matters more than ever Why legalism will ruin Sabbath for anybody Why we need to give ourselves grace as we seek to practice, not perfect Sabbath Here are a few of the resources we referenced during our conversation: The Body Teaches The Soul by Justin Whitmel Earley The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry by John Mark Comer Liturgy of the Ordinary by Tish Harrison Warren Next Steps Do you have some Sabbath practices that work for you? Get in touch so we can share them with our listeners! [email protected] We'd love to pray with you and hear how things are going in your marriage and family as well!
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Unsatisfied? Praying and Fasting to Find Contentment in God
On this Thursday Thought, we provide some time for reflection as God invites us to consider: Are there areas of our marriage or our lives where we don't feel contented or satisfied? If so, why might that be? In what ways is God calling us to a fast in those areas, whether that be from food or spending? Where do you have a sense that God is inviting you to fast in order to prepare you for his feast? For those interested in trying a "No-Spend Week" here is some advice from what we've learned: 1. Prepare! Make sure you have what you need for the week you won't be spending. 2. Do it in community. Ask another family or your small group to join you in this. 3. Give yourself grace. There will be things that don't go according to plan this week. 4. Pay attention. Are you still being drawn to fill your online shopping cart even if you aren't spending? What are you filling your time with that you'd normally be spending shopping? What is God trying to teach you as you observe these things? Interested in a food fast? You can find a resource to explore here. Next Steps Thanks for tuning in! We'd love to hear from you with how things are going with any fast God is inviting you into. We'd also love to pray for you. Get in touch! [email protected]
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Thief of Contentment: Why Spending Won't Make You Happier (and What We're Trying to Do About It!)
Dopamine is profitable. We live in an age where everything is designed to give us quick dopamine hits, from our devices to our online shopping carts, because retailers and marketers know that dopamine drives sales. But is this what God designed us for? As individuals and in our marriages? On this episode, we share about our experience of doing a "No Spend Week". We talk about: The difficulties there are in overcoming these quick dopamine hits What we learned from our week of not spending Why it's important to flex our "no muscle" (thanks to Bob and Linda Lotich for that reference!) Two tips for starting your "No Spend Week" Next Steps Let us know if you're going to try a No Spend Week so we can be praying for you and encouraging you! [email protected]
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Ditch your Phone (kind of)! A Prayer to Reclaim Intimacy in Your Marriage
In our last episode, we discussed the dangers and harm that can come to our relationships from unhealthy relationships with our devices. Today, we're providing space for us to reflect with God and one another. How have I given in to my phone and social media's design to give me quick dopamine hits? How has this replaced the slower work of intimacy and conversation in my marriage and family? How is God inviting me to more? We'll also pray for God's freedom for us from our devices and new habits to make sure our phones don't have the last word in our relationships. Next Steps Would you like some accountability or encouragement? Prayer? Please feel free to get in touch with us. It's always an honour hearing from you: [email protected]
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Thief of Intimacy: How Your Phone Is Harming Your Marriage and Family
We recently heard a very convicting conversation between Joey Odom of ReclaimWell and the great folks over at the Intentional Parenthood Podcast. In that conversation, Joey warns of how the phone can really kill intimacy between spouses and harm relationships between parents and children. On this episode, we review some of the harmful habits and attitudes we've formed around our devices and seek to discover God's hope, one small change at a time. We also make one suggestion we feel so strongly about that we put it directly in the show notes and that we believe will help you break proximity with your device: please do not charge your phones in your bedrooms! The harm far outweighs the good. Next Steps Join us for this Thursday's episode where we provide space for reflection on the relationship between us and our devices. If you'd like to get in touch for prayer, encouragement or if you have show ideas, email us: [email protected]
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Stop Grumbling, Start Groaning - A Prayer For Those Who Are Complaining
On this Thursday Thought, we re-visit our powerful conversation with Dr. John Littlejohn. (Listen to that on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or wherever you're listening to us from!) We reflect on the ways we intentionally or unintentionally fall into idolatry, how to seek God first, especially in the mundane and unpack the difference between an inward-focused grumbling that negatively affects our life and marriage and a God-focused groaning, where the Spirit of God groans with us. (Romans 8:22-27) We pray for those of us who feel like we're caught in a cycle of grumbling and complaint. Next steps If you'd like to get in touch with a prayer request or episode idea, we'd love to hear from you! [email protected] You can also donate to this non-profit ministry at our website - https://livingmarriages.com God bless!
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Seeking God First in the Mundane with Dr. John Littlejohn
For our 101st episode, we're thrilled to welcome back our great friend and a favourite podcast guest, Dr. John Littlejohn! We hear God's heart and word for his people in 2026, including: What it means for our lives and marriages to put God first What that means for us in the mundane details of life and marriage God's invitation to discover the plank in our eye before trying to take the speck out of our spouse's You'll also hear the first ever reference to Stevie Wonder on the Living Marriages Podcast! To find out more about Dr. John Littlejohn and his ministry and music, please click here. Next Steps Need some encouragement? Have an episode idea? Get in touch with us! We're always so excited to hear from you. [email protected] Make a charitable donation to this non-profit ministry at our website - https://livingmarriages.com
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100 Episodes Later: Is Your Marriage Living or Is It Dry Bones?
100 episodes ago, we asked a single question: Is your marriage healthy, or is it just dry bones? Today, we are celebrating 100 moments of God’s faithfulness, 100 conversations about intimacy, and the incredible goodness of a God who breathes life into the hardest places of our relationships. In this milestone episode of The Living Marriages Podcast, we are going back to where it all began. We re-visit the original vision God gave us from Ezekiel 37—the vision that launched Episode 1—and reflect on how that "Dry Bones" message is more relevant today than ever before. Next Steps Help us celebrate! The best "gift" you could give us for Episode 100 is to leave a review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify and share this episode with one couple who needs to hear that their "dry bones" can live again. Feel free to get in touch with us for prayer, encouragement and if you have episode ideas or guest suggestions! [email protected] Healthy Marriage, Ezekiel 37 Marriage, God’s Faithfulness in Marriage, The Living Marriages Podcast, Christian Relationship Advice, Restoration of Marriage, Marriage Mentoring
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099 | Why Family Devotionals Fail (And Why We're Giving Ourselves Grace in 2026)
If you've ever felt like a failure because you've had a hard time getting a family devotional started, this episode is for you. We’re sharing the one habit we’ve attached to our morning breakfast routine that's been working so far —and why God's grace is more important than perfection, especially when Kim Chi ruins breakfast! Resources A free online family devotional that uses the practice of lectio divina. This is The Biggest Story devotional our family has been using. This resource is written from a Reformed perspective. There are helpful videos that lead off each week's readings. Sometimes the questions are a bit simplistic or leading but overall our family has found it helpful. We'll often ask the kids our own questions based on the readings which have led to some incredibly fruitful conversations! (If you have the curiosity of a kid, you'll come up with some great questions for them!) Next Steps Feel free to get in touch with us for prayer, resources or with your episode ideas and guest suggestions! It's always a blessing hearing from you! [email protected]
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098 | When Sex Does Not Feel Like A Good Gift: A Prayer for Healing and Wholeness
In Episode 97, we interviewed renowned author Sheila Wray Gregoire about God's beautiful vision for sex and intimacy and how, sadly, there has been much harmful teaching and messaging that has made sex feel like anything other than a good gift from a good God. On this Thursday Thought, join us as we provide space and reflection to examine the messages we have learned about sex, how that has shaped our view and practice and intimacy in marriage and receive God's invitation to remain curious in this area. We also pray for God's healing, wholeness and freedom in the area of sexual intimacy in marriage. Next Steps Would you like prayer or to connect? We'd love to hear from you! [email protected] If you'd like to donate to this non-profit ministry, please visit our website to make a charitable donation: https://livingmarriages.com
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097 | If Sex is a Good Gift Why Do I Feel Dirty? with Sheila Wray Gregoire
Author Sheila Wray Gregoire has been writing Christian marriage and sex-advice since 2003. But in 2019, she made a shocking discovery about much of the advice that is out there for Christian couples. In our wide-ranging conversation with Sheila you'll hear: How Sheila discovered the harm that some best-selling Christian marriage books were causing readers and what she's doing about it How the beauty and intimacy of sex as God created it goes so far beyond intercourse How the message of purity culture was hurtful to so many Why we need to be curious about the marriage resources and advice we take in Why Sheila is hopeful for the future of Christian marriage and the church Resources You can find Sheila's books, podcasts and blog along with many other incredibly helpful resources at baremarriage.com Next Steps We feel so honoured and humbled when our listeners reach out for prayer, support and encouragement. We don't have all the answers but we do love praying for others and helping couples find hope and healing for their marriages in Christ's power. If we know of some people or resources that would be a great fit for you, we'll connect you. Get in touch with us! [email protected] If you'd like to support this non-profit ministry, you can make a donation at our website: https://livingmarriages.com
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096 | A Prayer For Those Wanting To Take Their Marriage Seriously
In episode 95, we shared God's invitation to us and you to start taking our marriages more seriously. We asked what neglect looks like in our marriage and how God might be inviting us to turn that around, what new habits or mindsets he might be asking us to commit to. On this Thursday Thought, we take time to reflect on where some of the chaos and fires might be in our marriage and how those might be pointing to signs of neglect in certain areas. We also pray for God's grace, wisdom and strength to understand and pursue what it looks like to start taking our marriages more seriously. Next Steps We'd love to hear from you how God is inviting you to take yourself and your marriage more seriously this year! Get in touch if you'd like prayer or some accountability: [email protected] Want to donate to this non-profit ministry? Visit our website to see how you can make a charitable donation!
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095 | Stop Neglecting Yourself! Why You Need To Take Your Marriage Seriously
It's always a good time to check in with God and one another on the state of your marriage and family. We happened to do our check-in at the end of 2025 and God had a pretty serious invitation for us: start taking yourselves and your marriage more seriously. It's an invitation we're passing on to you! On this episode you'll hear: What it looks like when you're not taking your marriage seriously and how God might be inviting you to change that The grace and humour you'll need for the journey and that God is freely offering How NOT to become overwhelmed when starting this journey Resources Here are a few of the books and resources that have captured our curiosity and imaginations and are giving us good ideas on how we can take ourselves more seriously this year. The Marriage You Want by Sheila Wray Gregoire and Dr. Keith Gregoire Habits of the Household by Justin Whitmel Earley Spiritual Health Reflection from Practicing the Way Next Steps We'd love to hear from you how God is inviting you to take yourself and your marriage more seriously this year! Get in touch if you'd like prayer or some accountability: [email protected] Want to donate to this non-profit ministry? Visit our website to see how you can make a charitable donation!
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094 | A Prayer for Your Marriage in 2026
Happy New Year! As we step into 2026, we wanted to pray God's blessing and provision for your marriage this year. That prayer involves bringing our "not enough", our "loaves and fish" to Jesus and to see what he will do with them. It means not limiting God in how and where he wants to provide for us. Join us for this time of prayer and blessing as we step into a New Year together! Next Steps Get in touch with us - we'd love to hear from you what you're excited about or worried about for this new year of 2026: [email protected] Want to support this non-profit ministry with a charitable donation? We're looking for monthly partners! For more information visit https://livingmarriages.com/donate#httpslivingmarriagescomdonate
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093 | How God Wants to Show Up for You in Your Marriage
If you're listening in real-time with us, this episode is being released at the end of 2025. As you look back on the year that was and look ahead to the year to come, how has God been enough for you? In your life and your marriage? Are there areas you've struggled seeing him as enough? Are there areas where you can celebrate his abundance? In this episode we share: The question that really got us thinking about our trust in God this past year A great question Jesus asks his disciples before feeding the 5000 Encouragement from the book of Acts for what God really wants to give us Next Steps Let us know how we can pray for you! Or if you have any show ideas, we'd love to hear from you: [email protected] Want to make a charitable gift before the end of the year? Visit our website to give: https://livingmarriages.com
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092 | A Christmas Day Greeting from the Au's (including the cutest poem reading of the year!)
If you're listening in real-time with us at the Living Marriages podcast, Merry Christmas! We've got a short Christmas Day greeting for you complete with an amazing rendition of a winter poem read by our incredible boys, Ethan and Elijah. Praying the love, joy, peace and hope of the Christmas season for you! Love, Aaron, April, Ethan and Elijah
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091 | The Most Important Conversation You May Have This Year with Cris and Christy Harper
We are so excited to introduce you to our good friends, Cris and Christy Harper. After God moved them to Edmonton from Alabama in the midst of a global pandemic to start church ministry, they felt a bit untethered in life and in their marriage. As they were approaching the end of the year, God invited them to a new practice, one which they've developed and practiced regularly at the end of each year. It's an incredible way of connecting, of building courage in communication, of repentance, of building friendship and deepening communion with one another and with Christ. Join us for this humour-filled and deeply encouraging conversation as we approach the end of 2025! Resources Here is the Spiritual Health Reflection and the Rule of Life Builder by the folks over at Practicing the Way. Interested in becoming a marriage mentor? FamilyLife Canada can provide the training and resources you need here. Next Steps If you'd like to get in touch, we'd love to hear from you and to pray with you! Send us an e-mail: [email protected] Please pray about supporting this non-profit podcast. For more information on making a charitable donation, please visit: https://livingmarriages.com
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090 | A Prayer for Curiosity and Connectedness in your Marriage
In Episode 89, we spoke with our friend Justin Chan about how in being curious about our differences and learning to honour them, God can draw us closer to one another and himself! On today's Thursday Thought we take time to reflect on some of the differences in our marriage, get curious about them and pray about how the Lord might be inviting us to honour these differences. We also are reminded about three of the most important words you can use in your marriage: "Tell me more!" Next Steps If you'd like us to pray for you or if you have any episode suggestions or ideas, get in touch with us! We'd love to hear from you: [email protected] If you're feeling led to make a charitable donation to help keep this non-profit ministry "on the air," please visit our website: https://livingmarriages.com
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089 | When Honouring Our Differences Can Bring Us Closer Together with Justin Chan
If you've been listening to the podcast for awhile, you'll know that two of the biggest dangers marriages face today are "drift" and "difference". Each is a tool the enemy uses to great effect to drive us further apart in our marriages. Today's guest, Justin Chan, Director of Oneness for Power to Change and founder of the PRAXIS experience, shares his wisdom and experience of how understanding and honouring the differences between us and our spouse can actually bring us closer to each other and to God. We chat about: The importance of self-awareness in our relationships with one another and God Discovering how cultural and social differences might be at play in our marriages Being curious about and honouring our differences Finding spiritual rhythms and practices that suit our personalities and that still bring us closer together in unity What it looks like to be "present FOR" our spouse when they can't be "present WITH." Next Steps If you'd like prayer or have feedback, guest or episode ideas, we'd love to hear from you! You can e-mail us at [email protected] If you're feeling led to support this non-profit ministry, you can make a charitable donation through our website https://livingmarriages.com
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088 | A Prayer for Clarity and Kindness This Holiday Season
As we discussed in Ep. 87, the holiday season can be anything but "the most wonderful time of the year." However, with clear communication and intentional planning, our families can move from just surviving this time to actually enjoying and thriving in it. Join us for this Thursday Thought as we reflect further on what kind of communication and planning we might need to have BEFORE we're in the thick of it. Plus, we pray that God would restore to us the wonder of Advent and Christmas, without all of the cultural baggage and expectation we often experience. Next Steps Get in touch! We'd love to hear from you about prayer requests you have or episode or guest ideas! [email protected] Want to donate to this non-profit ministry to help keep new content being published? Make a charitable donation at https://livingmarriages.com
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087 | Do This One Thing BEFORE Your Holidays Get Out of Hand
"It's the most wonderful time of the year..." At least that's how the carol goes. With American Thanksgiving barely in the rearview mirror and Christmas barreling towards us, are you feeling the joy and wonder of the Advent and Christmas seasons or are you feeling the pressure and expectation of yet another holiday? If you're feeling the pressure, like we are, make sure to stop and do this one thing: communicate! On this episode, we learn alongside you and encourage you to: Communicate clearly - make sure you both know what you are saying "yes" to Take time to understand your family traditions and expectations Make time for dates and connecting in the midst of busyness Prioritize your immediate family, even if you are travelling and visiting family abroad Resources For a great conversation of family of origin (especially in light of family traditions) please visit Episode 75. For some practical ideas for weekly check-ins as a couple, listen to Episode 11. (Links will open podcast episodes in Apple Podcasts) Next Steps We'd love to hear from you about how we can be praying for you during the holiday season. Or send us feedback and show note ideas! [email protected] If you'd like to support this non-profit ministry with a charitable donation, please visit https://livingmarriages.com
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086 | A Prayer for God's Best in Your Sex Life
On this Thursday Thought, we lean into God's grace and love as we seek to discover God's best for our sex life. We reflect on: Our conversation from Episode 85 with Joanna Sawatsky of baremarriage.com We re-affirm our view of the sacredness of sex intended for the covenant of marriage We lean into God's grace and healing for those affected by pornography, purity culture and more We discuss how obligation and entitlement have no place in the bedroom And much more! We also pray for God's healing, wholeness and best for the areas of sex and intimacy in our marriage. Next Steps Have ideas for guests, episode topics, feedback or prayer requests? Get in touch! [email protected] If you'd like to make a donation to this non-profit ministry, you can do so at our website: https://livingmarriages.com Grace and peace! Aaron and April
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085 | Memorable Messages, Sex and Intimacy with Joanna Sawatsky
There has been a lot of conversation in Christian circles recently about some of the well-intentioned yet harmful marriage advice that is being perpetuated, especially in some best-selling Christian materials. Today's guest, Joanna Sawatsky, has been working to shine a light on some of these teachings and their effects on marriages through rigorous research. Along with the team at baremarriage.com, she's also been sharing God's heart for hope, health and healing for our marriages. On this episode, we talk with Joanna about: What a memorable message is and how research shows the impact of these messages on the quality of our marriage and our sex life The importance of curiosity and holding space for others The harm that comes from marriage teachings that point to female obligation and male entitlement when it comes to sex Compassion and the importance of seeing each other as God's image-bearers Resources Joanna Sawatsky is an author, epidemiologist and biostatistician with the team at baremarriage.com. Please click on the link to find out more about the books, podcast and blog that Joanna referenced in our conversation. Next Steps Thoughts, feedback, episode ideas, prayer requests? Please get in touch with us. We'd love to hear from you and pray with you. [email protected] If you'd like to support this non-profit ministry, please visit our website to find out how you can partner with us in prayer and financially: https://livingmarriages.com
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084 | A Prayer for God's Care and Kindness Through Seasons of Transition
On this Thursday Thought, we take time to reflect on the conversation we had with Matt and Mandy Horne in episode 83. We draw encouragement and instruction from how God held them close and how they walked in "deep trust" with him through challenging transitions in life and marriage. We pray for all of our listeners going through these difficult seasons of transition. Next Steps If you'd like us to pray with you, we're here for you! Please drop us a line: [email protected] You can also donate to this non-profit ministry: https://livingmarriages.com
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083 | Experiencing God In Transitions with Mandy and Matt Horne
Mandy and Matt Horne have experienced A LOT of transition in their nearly 25 years of marriage. From several moves to adoption to working in ministry to starting a business, they have experienced the joys and challenges of the different seasons of life God has brought them through. In our conversation you'll hear: How God has held them close and how they have clung to him through difficult transitions How they took on roles and responsibilities they might have never dreamed of depending on the season they were in Mandy's 3 R Coaching Framework (Reconnect, Restore and Rise) Resources If you would like to find out more about Mandy's work as a board-certified Health and Wellness Nurse Coach, please visit her website: https://www.wellspringoflifecoaches.com/ For Mandy's special offer for a free resource for Living Marriages' listeners, please visit: https://gift.wellspringoflifecoaches.com/au If you'd like to get in touch with Aaron and April at the Living Marriages Podcast and ministry, please visit our website: https://livingmarriages.com or send us an e-mail with episode ideas, feedback and prayer requests: [email protected]
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082 | A Prayer For When You Feel Disconnected
On this Thursday Thought, we reflect back on Ep. 81 and the Marriage Hierarchy of Needs by Sheila and Keith Gregoire from "The Marriage You Want." We reflect and pray on the idea that if one of you feels like you're being chased by a bear in your marriage, you both are! Are we on the same level in our marriage and if not, have we communicated about it? Is this a season we are in by choice and if so, are we still communicating openly about it, giving gratitude for the other? And if this is not by choice and one spouse finds themselves in a different level of need, how are we going to support and help one another? Resources To see a diagram of the Marriage Hierarchy of Needs and hear Sheila Wray Gregoire and Dr. Keith Gregoire's conversation about this, please click here. Next Steps We'd love to hear from you. How do you see the Marriage Hierarchy of Needs playing out in your marriage? Any questions? Ideas for shows and guests? Prayer requests? Get in touch! [email protected] If you'd like to support our non-profit ministry in finances and prayer, you can visit our website to find how: https://livingmarriages.com
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081 | Why Nobody Is Worried About Sex While Being Chased By A Bear
You may have heard of Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs before - the idea that basic needs (such as food, clothing and safety) must be met before we can move into higher ideals (friendship, self-esteem, self-actualization.) What if the same were true for marriage? Authors Sheila Wray Gregoire and Dr. Keith Gregoire think this is the case. In their latest book, "The Marriage You Want", Sheila and Keith propose this idea in the context of marriage and assert "Your marriage...exists on the lowest tier that either of you occupies." On today's episode, we talk about this concept, see how it has played out in our marriage and how we can build bridges towards one another in terms of communication and sharing the load so that we can move towards a thriving marriage together. Resources To see a diagram of the Marriage Hierarchy of Needs and hear Sheila Wray Gregoire and Dr. Keith Gregoire's conversation about this, please click here. Next Steps We'd love to hear from you. How do you see the Marriage Hierarchy of Needs playing out in your marriage? Any questions? Ideas for shows and guests? Prayer requests? Get in touch! [email protected] If you'd like to support our non-profit ministry in finances and prayer, you can visit our website to find how: https://livingmarriages.com
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ABOUT THIS SHOW
The Go-To Podcast for Those Who Want To Rebuild Intimacy and Connection in Their Christ Centered MarriageHas the excitement of your wedding day now faded into the background? Are you so exhausted that the last thing you want to think about is your marriage?Do you and your spouse feel like ships passing in the night?If you’re craving the intimate, connected marriage God has for you, you’ve come to the right place!We’re April and Aaron Au, marriage coaches with over a decade of experience, who are on the journey to finding God’s best for our marriage while raising two young boys.We recently heard this wisdom: “If your marriage isn’t growing, it’s dying.” Yikes! That really got our attention! But if you think about it, it’s true. Marriages need direction, purpose and a common vision to thrive. If they don’t, they will inevitably drift apart. When you add the pressures of raising young children and the grind of daily work to the mix, there are even more forces that threaten to pull o
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Aaron Au, April Au | Marriage Coaching and Mentoring
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