The Women Are Plotting

A terrifying thought flashes across your mind and instead of fading, it sticks. It replays. It mutates. It demands proof that you’re a good person. That’s the lived reality of Harm OCD, and it’s why so many people suffer in silence while the world dismisses OCD as a “neat freak” trait.We sit down with author Kim Conrey to talk about her memoir, You’re Not A Murderer, You Just Have Harm OCD, co-written with her child, Finn. Kim breaks down what intrusive thoughts actually are, why they target the people and values you love most, and how shame keeps people from saying the words out loud. We also dig into the caregiver perspective, the fear of being misunderstood by professionals, and what it’s like to parent through anxiety and still keep the family moving.Along the way, we connect the science to real life: reassurance loops, compulsions you can’t always see, postpartum triggers, and why Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) is considered the gold standard for OCD treatment. We also talk about something that surprises people: humor. Not as denial, but as a way to form a new pathway, take the bite out of the obsession, and reclaim a little joy while you do the work.If you’ve ever worried that a thought means something terrible about you, this conversation is a reminder that thoughts aren’t actions and help exists. Subscribe for more, share this with someone who needs it, and leave a review so more listeners can find it.Send us Fan MailEmail us at [email protected], and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

Someone can go from “texting you nonstop” to acting like you’re engaged after one date, and suddenly you’re trapped in a conversation that won’t end. That’s where ghosting, blocking, and boundaries stop being abstract ideas and become very real decisions.We talk through the psychology of ghosting with research and lived experience, including why people disappear, why excessive texting can push someone to cut contact, and why many ghosters report feeling relief afterward. We also get honest about the darker side: the mental health fallout for the person left behind, how silence can feel passive-aggressive, and why so many of us crave closure even when we know the relationship is over. Along the way we share stories from dating apps, friendship breakups, and one unforgettable “blocked guy” twist that ends at a front door with a pizza.We also separate ordinary dating etiquette from safety. If someone is abusive, threatening, or sexually aggressive, going no-contact is not immaturity, it’s self-preservation. But when the situation is simply uncomfortable or disappointing, we explore how a direct message, a clear boundary, or even a scripted hard conversation can help both people grow and improve communication skills. We dig into generational shifts too, including how Gen Z and millennials navigate dating apps and why “just unmatch” can feel easier than being honest.Listen now, then subscribe, share with a friend who’s dating, and leave a review if this helped you. Where do you draw the line between ghosting and protecting your peace?Send us Fan MailEmail us at [email protected], and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

A stranger’s hand on your body. A customer who won’t leave your register. A coworker who hides behind “just kidding.” We go there, because sexual harassment is not a rare horror story, it’s a pattern that shows up in everyday workplaces and gets excused as flirtation, culture, or “that’s just how he is.” We (Etienne, Heidi, and Jane) trade real experiences from retail and hospitality to the military, nursing homes, and public schools, along with the data that proves how widespread workplace sexual harassment still is. We talk about the confusing gray zones people love to weaponize, like when consensual joking between friends gets misread by someone new, or when friendliness on the job is mistaken for romantic interest. We also dig into the power dynamics that keep people quiet: low wage jobs, customer entitlement, chain of command, tenure pressure, and the exhausting reality of having to “prove” what happened with perfect dates and documentation. The heart of the conversation is consent and respect. If you’re interested in someone, ask once with basic decency, accept no immediately, and don’t make it weird. If you’re being targeted, we share what helped us in the moment, what we wish workplaces did better, and why speaking up can protect the next person, especially young women and students. Subscribe to Women Are Plotting, share this with someone who needed it years ago, and leave a review so more listeners can find the conversation. What boundary do you wish everyone learned sooner?Send us Fan MailEmail us at [email protected], and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

Someone asked Jane if he could saran wrap her boobs, which sets this episode's tone: honest, hilarious, and more thoughtful than you’d expect. We discuss sexual kinks and fetishes without fake shock or shame, using real experiences and real definitions so you can finally understand what people mean when they say “I’m into that.”We break down the kink vs fetish difference in a way you can actually use in dating and relationships, especially when desires don’t match perfectly. Foot fetish comes up a lot and we explore the psychology theories people use to explain it: conditioning, reward loops, disgust and taboo, and even the brain science that links sensory maps of feet and genitals. If you’ve ever thought “I don’t get it,” we give you a different way to think about it.Then we go straight into watersports, also called urolagnia. We talk about why people find it intimate, taboo, or comforting, share surprising sexual fantasy stats, and add practical sexual health and consent considerations (including what not to do, and how to reduce risk if you’re experimenting). We also touch on auralism, exhibitionism, mummification, age play, and BDSM dynamics, with a clear through-line: two consenting adults, good communication, and a safe word when you need one.If you like episodes that mix research, storytelling, and real-life boundaries, hit subscribe, share it with a friend who loves a spicy psychology deep dive, and leave us a review. What kink or fetish do you still not understand, or what do you wish more people talked about openly?Send us Fan MailEmail us at [email protected], and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

You can feel it happening: the internet is getting louder, flatter, and more crowded with machine-written words. So where does that leave writers who actually care about voice, craft, and meaning? Etty, Heidi, and Jane talk through the real, messy middle of generative AI and writing, from the stats behind AI content growth to the gut-level question writers keep asking privately: can I use ChatGPT without giving away my work or my integrity?We dig into the trust problem first. AI tools can “hallucinate” with total confidence, spitting out fake citations, dummy links, and quotes that never existed. Jane shares how this shows up in content marketing and research workflows and why fact-checking is NOT optional. Then we pivot into creativity and the New York Times experiment “Can You Tell Which Short Story ChatGPT Wrote?” and why one oddly human detail can make a story feel alive while the AI version reads like competent drivel.From there, we get practical. We talk about reasonable use cases for authors: bios, query-letter help, marketing copy, social posts, and rewriting a paragraph when you’re stuck, while keeping the manuscript itself human. We also get honest about data privacy, enterprise “sandbox” setups, and why many writers should refuse to upload full drafts. Finally, we look at how publishing is responding, including agents asking writers to attest they did not use AI, and what a future full of AI slop could mean for readers and for the value of human-made art.Subscribe for more conversations like this, share the episode with a writer friend, and leave us a review so more listeners can find the show. Where do you personally draw the line with AI and writing?Send us Fan MailEmail us at [email protected], and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

We swap our most unforgettable celebrity close encounters, from sweet sidewalk chats to moments that feel too strange to be random. Along the way, we dig into fan etiquette and why photos can kill a real connection.• Dwayne Johnson’s no-snooze alarm app and the psychology of motivation • Debbie Harry’s terrifying Ted Bundy car ride story and trusting your instincts • Paul McCartney’s take on photos and why he prefers real conversation • Anne Perry’s hidden past and how a true crime becomes pop culture • Tim Roth lighting a cigarette and the awkward intimacy of meeting actors • Trent Reznor lifting Etienne to safety and the rush of a real close encounter • Adam Duritz’s writer’s block era and the truth about his dreads • Jane’s music-world run-ins and the Perry Farrell “Mitsubishi” synchronicities • Stephen Perkins in a vegan food line and backstage brush-pasts • Tim Gunn kindness in New York and John Carpenter at a Starbucks • Why we still love the art even when celebrity culture gets weird If you have a story you'd like to share or have any comments, we'd love to hear from you. Send us Fan MailEmail us at [email protected], and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

Something shifts in a friendship—you miss a call, dodge a check-in, or quietly stop showing up—and suddenly that easy, comfortable bond has tension running underneath it. We follow that feeling straight into the messy, meaningful world of accountability, where being called out might be the very thing that keeps a relationship alive.We dig into the science first: friendships aren’t just nice to have—they’re tied to longevity, mental health, and overall well-being. Add accountability, and suddenly your odds of actually following through on goals jump from 65% to 95%. But this isn’t just theory. Through personal stories, we see how real change often starts when someone else draws a line—like a partner finally saying “enough” after years of destructive drinking, or a friend calling out self-sabotage during a depressive spiral.Then we get into the uncomfortable part: why people avoid holding each other accountable in the first place. Fear of conflict. Fear of losing the relationship. Fear of being wrong. But again and again, the hosts show that when accountability comes from care—not judgment—it strengthens relationships rather than breaking them. And when it does break them? That might tell you everything you need to know.We also explore how accountability shows up in everyday life: sharing your goals out loud so you actually pursue them, noticing when a friend goes quiet and checking in, or creating systems—lists, habits, routines—that keep you honest with yourself. Even small nudges can be the difference between staying stuck and moving forward.If you’ve ever needed a push, avoided a hard conversation, or wondered why it’s so much easier to show up for others than for yourself, this one hits close. Listen now, share it with a friend who keeps you honest, and ask yourself: who’s holding you accountable—and who are you holding accountable in return?Send us Fan MailEmail us at [email protected], and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

Something is “off” in the woods, your dog freezes, and suddenly every harmless shadow has a pulse. We follow that feeling straight into the world of cryptids, starting with the perfectly named “Not Deer” and ending with the question that haunts every Bigfoot thread: if everyone has a camera now, why is the evidence still so hard to come by?We dig into Sasquatch lore through personal stories and modern reporting, from a childhood “secret racetrack” in tall grass that later starts to sound like a Bigfoot nest, to a family member’s sighting of multiple Bigfoot figures moving fast between Iowa cornfields near the Raccoon River. We also explore how Bigfoot sightings stack up against black bear sightings, why some locations show up again and again in BFRO-style databases, and what makes classic footage like the Patterson-Gimlin film so sticky in the public imagination.Then we get practical and a little skeptical: expedition groups bring serious tools like specialized audio recorders, software analysis, infrared, and night vision, but weather can wreck everything and hard ground can erase footprints before they ever form. We also talk about the reality of “capture the moment” panic, why even good phones struggle with distance and darkness, and how AI-generated video makes the trust problem even messier for cryptozoology, paranormal stories, and UFO-style sightings.If you love Bigfoot, Mothman, local monster legends, and the psychology of why we believe, listen now. Subscribe, share with a friend who hikes, and leave a review so more curious people can find us. What cryptid do you swear lives near you?Send us Fan MailEmail us at [email protected], and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

We roast terrible dating photos, celebrate profiles that actually work, and trade stories about the green flags and red flags hiding in plain sight. From “naked elf on the shelf” to coachable partners and clever bios, we map the line between playful and off-putting.• why bathroom selfies and hotel tub shots repel• how smiling, eye contact, and daylight build trust• why context photos beat brooding car pics• honest bios that charm vs edgy lines that alarm• coachable partners and sexual communication• hygiene, boundaries, and safety as non-negotiables• what to crop out: kids, exes, and random friends• profile formulas that convert swipes to dates• when to walk away from reschedules and dudsSend us Fan MailEmail us at [email protected], and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

We trade outrageous, honest stories about sexual mishaps and pair them with real medical facts, hygiene guidance, and hard boundaries that keep intimacy safe and fun. From penile fractures to water-vacuum myths, we turn cringe into caution and humor into useful advice.• common mishaps vs real injuries• ER data on penile fractures and how maybe to avoid them• hickeys, clots, and surprising medical risks• water sex myths, suction hazards, lost lube• consent, “wrong hole,” and stopping fast• oral boundaries and post-meal gag reflex risk• foreskin hygiene, yeast transmission, doctor talk• toy safety, retrieval loops, and stuck-object fixes• vaginal moisturizers, clumps, and timing tips• practical PSAs and safer-play checklistSend us Fan MailEmail us at [email protected], and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

What if your roommate hung clown masks in the kitchen, nurtured a mold colony, or secretly read your pay stub? We dive into the relatable world of shared living—where tiny habits tell big truths—and trace the line between quirky and dangerous. We start with internet legends—the bean scientist, the salsa collector, the almost-house‑trained dog, and the hidden parrot—then pivot to real life: dorm music wars, blinds killing plants, Air Force bunks where bedtime is not your own, and a basement apartment that becomes a masterclass in boundaries. When perfume levels mysteriously drop, groceries evaporate, and money questions won’t stop, trust breaks. A late‑night confession about sabotaging a car seals it. The escape plan is clinical and necessary: track debts, move utilities, set timelines, and protect your privacy.Not every story is grim. One roommate match brings daily tea, clean counters, and shared playlists, proving alignment matters more than sameness. We unpack the five pillars that make or break a roommate friendship—cleanliness, noise and guests, food and supplies, money and bills, and privacy and locks. Then we turn to partners: draped clothes at the foot of the bed, sloped ceilings that threaten bookshelves, and a “wait for the pink bill” philosophy that needs a system. Compromise, structure, and humor make it work.By the end, you’ll have a fresh lens for spotting red flags early—before the clown art hits the common area. If you’ve got a story that tops a hidden parrot or a mold experiment, we want to hear it. Subscribe, share with a friend who’s hunting for a roommate, and leave a review with your best rule for peaceful living. What’s your non‑negotiable?Send us Fan MailEmail us at [email protected], and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

Menopause shouldn’t feel like a mystery you solve in the dark. We pull back the curtain on overlooked symptoms and the relief many women are still told to fear—from local estrogen for UTIs and urethral irritation to transdermal estradiol that supports heart and brain health. Alongside our guest Daisy, we trace a two-year odyssey through shrugging specialists, “normal” labs, and finally a team that connected the dots: thyroid conversion issues, deep vitamin D deficiency, low iron, and classic perimenopause symptoms hiding in plain sight.We talk plainly about what too many guides skip: itchy ear canals, phantom cigarette smells, sleep shattered by hourly bathroom trips, rage that spikes out of nowhere, and a belly that refuses to budge because fat is making up for lost estrogen. We explain why timing matters for HRT safety, how patches and micronized progesterone change the profile, and why a single hormone test can’t capture a system in flux. The bigger picture emerges when you zoom out—estrogen influences hundreds of functions, so “random” problems often share a common root.This is a call for evidence over alarmism and agency over resignation. If unwarranted black box labels scare you, we walk through what’s changed, where the data is strongest, and encourage you to find a doctor who listens to you! Bring a clear symptom log, ask about transdermal options, test vitamin D, iron, and full thyroid markers, and don’t accept “you’re fine” when your body says otherwise. We’re Gen X loud on purpose regarding HRT: so you can feel better sooner, protect your heart and bones, think clearer, and keep joy in your body. If this helped, subscribe, share it with a friend who needs answers, and leave a review to push this conversation further.Send us Fan MailEmail us at [email protected], and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

Dating can sometimes be thrilling. And other times absolutely unhinged. Our wildest dating horror stories may make you laugh, cringe, and rethink your safety plan for your next first meet. We start with a hilarious “not-a-date” blind date to a Hamptons rave that brings hostage vibes to mind, before moving on to an OKCupid date featuring age lies, drunk negging, and leering tag-a-long friends.  We end with a multi-week dating experience where tiny icks—heavy footsteps, salad slurping, and "almost" empty condiments—foreshadow a hard boundary breach around hygiene and kink consent. Each story is ridiculous, but each also reveals a principle worth keeping: believe what people show you, exit fast when a boundary is crossed, and never apologize for protecting your peace.We don’t just vent; we translate chaos into practice. Keep first meets short and public. Don’t debate the red flag that shows up on minute ten. Listen, laugh with us, then add your voice—we want your worst-date stories and your dating dealbreakers. If you smiled, winced, or took a note, please follow the show, share it with a friend, and leave a review so other listeners can find us. Your stories might save someone’s night (or make it!).Send us Fan MailEmail us at [email protected], and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

We swap myths for methods and share the rituals, tools, and edits that actually move pages from first draft to final. From Hardy’s shawl to Hugo’s naked deadline, we strip the romance down to reliable habits, smart structure, and brave cuts.• Thomas Hardy’s routine and why rituals prime focus• Kerouac’s scroll and the limits of superstition• Victor Hugo’s nude deadline hack and modern equivalents• Personal cues that trigger flow without lyrics• Placeholders to bypass roadblocks and keep momentum• Outlines, character bios, and scene objectives• Working with editors, beta readers, and writing groups• Cutting 20k words, merging characters, and pacing fixes• Dialogue that starts late and ends on change• Meditation as an idea gateway and habit anchorSend us Fan MailEmail us at [email protected], and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

Jane, Heidi, and Etty trade raw, funny, and unsettling babysitting stories—celebrity trivia, 80s nostalgia, grooming red flags, an axe in a basement—while tracing how babysitting moved from teen rite of passage to vetted adult work. We end with clear lines on safety, values, and what kids miss when teens stop sitting.• how 80s babysitting shaped teen autonomy and risk• why teen babysitting declined and the rise of adult sitters• boundary setting, consent, and spotting grooming• hotel gigs, wedding childcare, and strange house rules• parenting values vs sitters’ beliefs and language• safety planning, alarms, exits, and emergency thinking• screens vs play and what teens learn by caring for kids• the sweet perks: snacks, cable, and Solid Gold memoriesSend us Fan MailEmail us at [email protected], and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

Think a festival is just loud music and long lines? Try building a city from nothing, losing your tent to a dust storm, getting adopted by strangers, and watching 70,000 people cheer a sunset after the sky finally breaks. We go deep on Burning Man’s origin and layout, the wild generosity of the gifting economy, and why art cars, late-night DJs, and a “library” with severe late fees can add up to something close to a spiritual reset.Heidi takes us inside her first burn: a three-day drive with a near-stranger, the shock of dust, rain, and mud, and the kindness that appears exactly when you need it. We talk about flaming octopi and sheep-shaped sound systems, disco-themed porta potties, survival in scorching heat, and the moment the city shifts from spectacle to community. Her self-protection habits start to crack, and a different kind of courage comes through.We widen the lens to festival culture at large—from the Pythian Games to today’s explosion of music festivals—and why gatherings like this are popular. There’s a reason the phones go quiet and the conversations go deep. We unpack how to bring the best parts home: more play, more art, more purpose, and a renewed commitment to real human connection. Curious but not ready for the big burn? We point out regional burns like Alchemy near Atlanta as a welcoming on-ramp.If you’re craving less doomscroll and more aliveness, you’ll find ideas, laughs, and hard-won tips here. Hit play, then tell us: would you brave the dust for a week that might change your mind? Subscribe, share with a friend who needs a reset, and leave a review to help more listeners find the show.Send us Fan MailEmail us at [email protected], and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

What if attention and emotion could nudge your biology toward healing? We dive into a potent mix of emerging research, lived experience, and practical tools to explore how meditation, sound baths, and intention might change the way the body behaves. We talk through exosomes—tiny messengers that carry proteins and microRNAs—and the provocative idea that elevated neural activity and emotion could influence gene expression beyond the brain. It’s a big claim, but we ground it with routines anyone can try: loving-kindness, breathwork, yoga, salt baths, and self-Reiki.You’ll hear revealing stories: a sudden drop in sugar cravings after a full-moon sound bath, pain relief after a foot injury thanks to Reiki, and a long history of stress-linked dermatitis easing with consistent meditation. We also reflect on collective healing sessions, the role of epigenetics, and why feeling the outcome as if it’s already here is the key to seeing changes in your life. Along the way, we consider sleep, wearables, and energy hygiene—turning off devices, stepping away from EMF during deep work, and using movement as a gateway into stillness.This isn’t about blind faith; it’s about testing simple, low-cost inputs that quiet stress and let the body self-correct. Whether you’re “woo-curious” or data-driven, you’ll leave with things to try, resources to explore, and a renewed sense of agency over your inner world. If this conversation sparks something, share it with a friend who needs a nudge toward calm, subscribe for more curious deep dives, and leave a review to help others find the show.Send us Fan MailEmail us at [email protected], and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

What happens when you sit at 4 a.m. and breathe yourself into stillness for five and a half hours? We follow that question into Joe Dispenza’s retreat world, where heart-brain coherence, deliberate breathwork, and intention-setting collide with stories of recovery, time dilation, and a surprising lack of stress after the fact. We’re candid about how a structured seven-day schedule can change your baseline more than any single mystical moment.We start with the backstory—Joe’s accident, the visualization that reshaped his path—and then ground the conversation in research on meditation’s effects on gray matter, the amygdala, and emotional regulation. From there, we walk through the retreat mechanics: guided sessions, kaleidoscope focus, and pineal gland work timed to melatonin’s pre-dawn peak. Whether you’re curious about the quantum field framing or you just want practical tools, we translate big ideas into clear steps you can test: morning body scans, loving-kindness for compassion, and a simple daily hour that shifts your nervous system out of high-beta churn.Along the way, we share hard-won stories—ICU resolve, sound-bath visions, and coherence healing circles that feel like focused compassion in action. We also look at growing collaborations with researchers, control groups, and odd signals like random number generators that seem to “notice” heightened coherence. You don’t have to chase fireworks to benefit; becoming the person who can relax into “the nothing” and choose a future feeling is often enough to change your day—and, over time, your life.If this episode helps you breathe easier or think differently about practice, tap follow, share it with a friend who needs calm, and leave us a quick review so more curious minds can find the show.Referenced in this episode:https://sourcethefilm.org/Send us Fan MailEmail us at [email protected], and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

What if the fictional worlds that raised us were more than escapes—what if they were blueprints? We trade closets for cosmos and follow the thread from Narnia’s lamp-lit snow to Starfleet’s hopeful future, from campus rooms that spark courage to city streets where magic hides in plain sight. Along the way we test our cravings: a society without want, a classroom that opens a life, a love story that knows its limits.We start with wonder. Childhood awe lives in The Chronicles of Narnia and in a real-life classroom modeled after Dead Poets Society, where literature isn’t just homework, it’s a rehearsal for bravery. Then we move to science fiction, where Star Trek models a peaceful Earth and Star Wars adds a mythic scale that makes us itch to belong to a bigger story. We interrogate power, consent, and seductive bad-boy archetypes from Twilight to Fifty Shades of Grey.From there the conversation tilts darker and sharper. A Discovery of Witches reframes magic as scholarship and intimacy. And, Anne Rice threads immortality through history and faith, showing how adaptations can miss the point when filmmakers ignore a story’s moral spine. We unpack the film Passengers and why a romantic setup turns ethically thorny under pressure, then hold dystopias to the light: Brave New World’s pleasant control versus The Stand’s reset, where community and books rebuild meaning after the noise of a crowded humanity has settled.Through it all we keep returning to one simple act: reading. Not as escape, but as calibration. Stories teach us what to want—and what to refuse. They sketch better classrooms, saner technologies, and kinder politics. Press play for a lively, candid tour of the universes we’d actually live in, why they matter now, and how to carry their best parts back home. If this sparks your own shortlist of dream worlds, share it with us, subscribe, and leave a review so more curious listeners can find the show.Send us Fan MailEmail us at [email protected], and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

Part 2 of Martha’s long road through endometriosis continues. In this episode, we discuss more complications she experienced post-hysterectomy, including sudden menopause and the hormone therapy that finally restored her life. We focus on advocacy, access, and the value of specialists who treat endo beyond “bad cramps.”Yale article mentioned in part 1 & 2: https://medicine.yale.edu/news/yale-medicine-magazine/article/endometriosis/Martha's doctors & surgeons mentioned in this episode: Dr. Rachel Cowherdhttps://www.getcare.muschealth.org/providers/rachael-cowherd-1043604374Dr. Thomas Curranhttps://www.getcare.muschealth.org/providers/thomas-curran-1205147022Dr. Cristian M. Thomaehttps://www.getcare.muschealth.org/providers/cristian-thomae-1306934658Heidi's surgeon in Bonita Springs, Florida:https://providers.sharecare.com/doctor/dr-jorge-a-valleEmail us at [email protected] and find us on all the socialsSend us Fan MailEmail us at [email protected], and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

Pain that steals whole years shouldn’t be shrugged off as “just a bad period.” We sit down with Martha, a nurse who spent years begging to be believed, and trace the arc from precocious puberty and crippling cramps to an overdue MRI that finally revealed advanced endometriosis. Her story cuts through myths and minimization to show exactly how endo can derail work, intimacy, and mental health—and what it takes to get real answers.This conversation is for anyone navigating pelvic pain, irregular bleeding, or cyclical GI symptoms that don’t add up—and for the clinicians who want to do better. We unpack why endometriosis staging doesn’t predict suffering, how an MRI can be decisive when red flags stack up, and where to find the right specialists for endometriosis surgery. We also talk about the emotional weight of seeking gynecologic care in spaces geared toward pregnancy, and why validation is as healing as any prescription. If you or someone you love is fighting to be heard, you’ll leave with language, next steps, and the confidence to ask for what you need.If this resonates, follow the show, share it with a friend who needs validation, and leave a review to help more people find these stories. Your voice helps others get the care they deserve.Yale article referenced in this episode: https://medicine.yale.edu/news/yale-medicine-magazine/article/endometriosis/Martha's doctors/surgeons: Dr. Thomas Curran (https://www.getcare.muschealth.org/providers/thomas-curran-1205147022)Dr. Cristian M. Thomae (https://www.getcare.muschealth.org/providers/cristian-thomae-1306934658)Send us Fan MailEmail us at [email protected], and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

What if the signs weren’t pointing to “the one,” but to the work? We pull apart the magnetic chaos of twin flames and the steady, grounded ease of soulmates, sharing real stories of closure, synchronicities, and the kind of love that doesn’t ask you to shrink. We discuss why runner-chaser dynamics feel addictive, how telepathy-like moments and “meant to be” coincidences can mask unhealed wounds, and the simple tells that cut through noise: equal effort, emotional availability, and laughter that lands in the same place for both of you.Along the way, we share the metrics that matter. Humor as a shared language and nervous system regulator. Attention as love in practice, from small rituals to memory-rich gifts. Safety as a daily experience, not a promise. You’ll hear how one of us mistook an intense, supernatural-feeling bond for fate—and found freedom in closure. You’ll also hear a love story that still sparkles decades later, proof that romance can be tender and intentional without the volatility. The big insight: healthy partnership makes you more you and inspires growth without drama.We also zoom out to the cultural scripts that train us to chase intensity: princess narratives, quick fixes, and the myth that pain equals depth. Then we zoom back in to practical advice you can use today—treat intrusive thoughts of an ex as an inner alarm, not a cosmic tug; set non-negotiables around humor, reciprocity, and curiosity; and hold out for a relationship that feels like home. If you’ve ever wondered whether your “twin flame” is a teacher and your soulmate is still ahead, this conversation gives language, clarity, and a gentler way forward.If this resonated, follow the show, share it with a friend who needs the reminder not to settle, and leave a review so more people can find us.Send us Fan MailEmail us at [email protected], and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

A good friendship rarely “just happens” after 30. Between work, caretaking, and the aftershocks of a pandemic, the casual paths that used to pull us together have narrowed—and the loneliness stats prove it. We’re diving into what it really takes to build and keep female friendships in midlife, from turning neighborly small talk into real support to setting boundaries when values clash.We compare the myth and mess of famous friendships with our own stories: friend breakups sparked by triangulation, political divides that felt impossible, and the moments that changed everything—like a quiet ride home from a medical procedure or a last-minute moving day rescue. We explore research on how long closeness actually takes, why most people meet their best friend around 21, and the practical steps to create new bonds when time is tight. And yes, we talk about gossip: when it helps you process and repair versus when it corrodes trust.Along the way, you’ll pick up simple tools you can use today. We share our “bananas” SOS code that turns need into action without guilt. We show how dogs, gardens, yoga classes, and Meetup groups act as catalysts to find friends in real life. We discuss having the hard conversations that nurture real friends or end friendships with people we didn't need in our lives. And we make a case for planning time with friends with the same energy you plan work—calendars, rituals, trips, and a pipeline of things to look forward to.If you’ve felt the ache of drifting apart or the risk of reaching out, this conversation will give you language, structure, and courage. Listen, then text a friend to take a walk, have a coffee, or swap books this week—and try a shared code word for those “please call me now” moments. If this episode resonates with you, please follow the show, share it with a friend, and leave a quick review so more people can find their people.Send us Fan MailEmail us at [email protected], and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

What if sex isn’t something we do, but a place we go together? We take that idea seriously and use it to reexamine the stubborn orgasm gap—how men climax more often in partnered sex, and what it actually takes for women to feel safe, aroused, and heard. From the lens of intimate justice to the very real numbers behind the disparity, we lay out how culture, porn scripts, and silence combine to make pleasure lopsided—and how education, trust, and honest language may flip the script.We share candid stories of first orgasms, the role of headspace, and how tools like vibrators and specific media may help people learn their arousal patterns. But the heart of the conversation is relational: safety before strategy, curiosity before choreography. When partners ask specific questions—Where should I touch? Slower or firmer? Stay there?—and prioritize stimulation, pacing, and warm-up, the likelihood of mutual pleasure rises fast. We talk about why some women fake it, how to stay safe while advocating for yourself, and how women should consider debriefing so the next encounter gets better.If you’ve ever wondered how to close the pleasure gap without turning intimacy into a checklist, this is your map. We offer sequencing tips like “ladies first” and a reminder that pleasure is learned, not luck. Join us as we challenge stale norms, trade performance for presence, and strive to design sex that’s generous, communicative, and genuinely shared. If this resonated, follow the show, share it with a friend, and leave a review telling us one rule you’re making non-negotiable.Send us Fan MailEmail us at [email protected], and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

What if consciousness can wander—during sleep, during sex, or in the quiet of a deep meditation—and return with a story that won’t fit inside ordinary life? We open that door with firsthand accounts of floating above a childhood bedroom, being “seen” across continents while asleep elsewhere, and a night vision of a house fire that matched the morning’s grim news. The conversation moves from goosebumps to ground rules: questioning the difference between astral projection and remote viewing, what NDEs share with OBEs, and why so many people report lasting shifts toward empathy and meaning after stepping beyond the body.We lean into practice, not dogma. From pre-dawn meditations tuned for theta states to body scanning that eases awareness into “nothingness,” we share the simple techniques that made the biggest difference. Group coherence becomes its own teacher: rooms feel different after a hundred quiet minds settle there, and that collective energy can be measured in subtle ways. We also explore ecstatic states that medicine might label dissociation, asking whether language obscures the lived reality when bliss, presence, and clarity expand far past the edges of skin.Past lives enter with surprising specificity. One regression delivers a nameable face from Napoleonic-era France—later found in an actual portrait—and another unpacks patterns that echo into this lifetime: the compulsion to write, the fear of thirst, the pull to champion stories erased by history. Children add their own puzzle pieces, recognizing an old song at first note, recalling bridges and “last time,” and describing indoor “fog” that feels like company rather than fear. Whether you call it God, source, spirit, or simply the energy we share, the takeaway is practical: kindness multiplies, community matters, and ten minutes of daily meditation can change everything.Press play to explore astral projection, near-death parallels, regressions, and the everyday practices that bring awe within reach. If a story sparks your own, we want to hear it—subscribe, share with a friend who loves a good mystery, and leave a review with your biggest question or experience.Send us Fan MailEmail us at [email protected], and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

A lot of us carry a bathroom story like a secret scar. We decided to tell ours out loud. We open with clear, useful GI truths, then tumble headlong into the messy middle where science meets life: nurses dodging diarrhea, a patient seemingly “birthing” something awful, and an outrageous septic tank failure that no one was prepared for. It’s raw, ridiculous, and surprisingly reassuring.We step back in time to toilet history and the pungent realities of pre-plumbing cities, where waste fell from windows and tapestries hid more than art. That context reframes modern embarrassment and reminds us how far we’ve come. Along the way we decode poop & pee color changes, and share the practical tricks you’ll be glad to know before your next meal or medicine. Travel adds stakes: food poisoning at 35,000 feet, flight attendants quietly setting aside a lavatory, and the small mercies that make survival possible.Threaded through is a creative arc: years ago Jane & Heidi wrote Shiterature, a humor collection of true bodily malfunctions, but the market wasn’t ready. Now it is. They're dusting it off, aiming for print, and opening the doors to your stories so it reflects more than their own. If you’ve ever laughed until you peed, sprinted for a bathroom, or survived a plumbing apocalypse, you’re among friends here. Hit play for equal parts anatomy, history, catastrophe, and catharsis—and if it makes you feel less alone, that’s the win. Subscribe, share with the brave souls in your group chat, and email us your story at [email protected]. We can’t wait to read it!Send us Fan MailEmail us at [email protected], and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

What if the person you love most thrives on making you small? We go straight into the lived realities of narcissistic parents, partners, and friends—how they isolate, control, and turn you into “supply”—and what it takes to break free. We start with the facts, including DSM-5 prevalence estimates and why real-world numbers may be higher, then move into raw personal stories: body shaming in public, relentless phone calls, stalking, and that gnawing guilt that lingers long after you set a boundary.Therapy becomes a lifeline. You’ll hear how a simple notebook exercise—documenting every small kindness—rewired a brain trained to remember only pain. We talk about gray rock in clear, practical terms: when it helps, why it can trigger blowback, and how to pair it with safety planning. We also unpack covert versus overt narcissism. Not every narcissist is loud; some hide behind fragility, passive-aggressive compliments, and constant blame-shifting. The result is the same: you become smaller, more apologetic, and less yourself.We challenge the “family first” script and offer a different compass: peace over performative loyalty. When someone targets your kids or uses religion, illness, or guilt as a leash, it’s time to set limits. Expect escalation; prepare with allies, documentation, and if needed, legal options. Along the way we name the tactics—gaslighting, projection, supply—so you can spot them early. We also explore where hope might come from, from CBT to new modalities, without pretending there’s a cure for NPD today.If you’re navigating narcissistic dynamics, you’re not alone. Press play for language, tools, and courage to protect your mind, rebuild your worth, and choose a life that feels safe and wide open again. If this conversation resonated, subscribe, share it with someone who needs it, and leave a review to help others find the show.Malignant Self-Love: Narcissism Revisited -- the book referenced by Etty in this episode.Send us Fan MailEmail us at [email protected], and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

The bravest thing about midlife isn’t the leap. It’s admitting the life you’ve outgrown—and choosing the one that actually fits. We dig into the surge in “gray divorce,” the myths around the midlife crisis, and why so many of us are trading the familiar grind for a more honest path. The stories are personal: leaving long marriages with care, discovering the power of therapy, and finding new careers that honor the work we’ve done and the art we still want to make.We go there on menopause—hot flashes, brain fog, and the mental haze that can make everything feel harder—and how hormone replacement therapy, used thoughtfully with a clinician, can turn the lights back on. That clarity changes relationships: boundaries sharpen, equality becomes nonnegotiable, and the mental load gets named. We talk about great sex decades in, dating with self-respect, and the joy of partnerships that celebrate growth rather than fear it. Reinvention doesn’t just happen at home; it shows up in community. From Meetup to TikTok, we share practical ways to build a tribe in a new city, repair old ties, and cultivate friendships that hold through grief and change.If you’ve ever wondered whether it's too late to start over, publish your first novel, move states, or simply ask for better—this conversation is proof that the clock isn’t your enemy. Fear is. And everything you ever wanted might be on the other side of it. Subscribe, share with a friend who needs courage today, and leave a review to help more people find the show. Then tell us: what new beginning are you ready to claim?Send us Fan MailEmail us at [email protected], and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

What if your favorite night out started with a paper flyer, a record shop clerk, and a map to a secret checkpoint? We rewind to the 90s and talk about the joy and grit of an analog life: finding raves by word of mouth, calling home from payphones that smelled like a thousand mornings, and guarding your cash, keys, and dignity in a pocket instead of a cloud. Reality Bites kicks off a bigger question that defined our generation—what does it mean to sell out—and we follow that thread through college radio, grunge, and the warehouse floors where strangers turned into friends.We share the stories that never made it to social feeds: the after-hours marathons, the black dust in your nose that proved you danced hard, the thrill of airports when you could walk loved ones to the gate, and the chaos of getting lost without Google Maps until a stranger’s directions finally clicked. There’s real talk about safety and power too—mosh pits, elbows, and the moments when harassment exposed the worst of L.A.'s music industry—and how music still gave us a place to burn anger into something cleaner. Along the way, we remember thrifted flannels, the Rachel haircut, MTV’s Liquid Television, and the stubborn weight of a single photo you had to wait weeks to see.If you’ve ever wondered why authenticity mattered so much—why some bands refused merch, why mixtapes felt sacred, why a twenty in an old coat could redeem a week—this conversation will feel like a mixtape made just for you. We also look forward, noticing how Gen Z embraces thrifting and pushes back on overconsumption, and we ask what a hybrid life could look like: digital tools with analog soul. Hit play, travel back with us, and then tell us your story. Subscribe, share with a friend who lived their own warehouse nights, and leave a review with the 90s song that still hits you in the chest.Send us Fan MailEmail us at [email protected], and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

We explore muses as myth, metaphor, and practice, from Greek goddesses and Homeric invocations to who or what inspired a few rock-and-roll gods. We connect inspiration to memory, trauma, and discipline.• a film about a muse• The creative catalysts for some Beatles and Clapton classics• Greek Muses as daughters of memory and the role of invocation• Elizabeth Gilbert’s Big Magic and the idea-migration concept• mundane routines that trigger ideation• a subway story as a study in noticing what's around you• trauma-informed character building and credible villains• ethics of borrowing from real life• the unreliability of memory and writing from subjective truth• empathy as a creative muscle that strengthens storytelling• discipline, time management, and finishing the workEmail us at [email protected] of course, you can find us on all the socialsThanks, and until next time, be safe and be excellent to each otherSend us Fan MailEmail us at [email protected], and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

Heidi, Jane, and Etienne unpack what “friends with benefits” really means, where lines blur, and how rules and honesty can protect both the friendship and the fun. We share personal wins, cringes, and recoveries—plus what happens when chemistry, expectations, and silence collide.• defining friends with benefits • study insight on college FWB • rules that work—safer sex, monogamy agreements, overnights, exit plans• when a relationship slides into FWB without consent• why communication prevents one-sided feelings and ghosting• kissing chemistry, technique, and the unglamorous realities• adult cross-gender friendships, boundaries, and hidden crushes• age gaps, power dynamics, and consent clarity• threesomes versus fantasy—performance pressure and logistics• how to end kindly and salvage real friendshipsEmail us at info at the women are plotting.comAnd of course, you can find us on all the socialsThanks, and until next time, be safe and be excellent to each otherSend us Fan MailEmail us at [email protected], and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

Remember when coming home meant fumbling with a key on a chain around your neck, dropping your backpack, and turning on the TV before your parents got home from work? The Women Are Plotting podcast takes us back to those formative years when television wasn't just entertainment—it was our babysitter, teacher, and window to the world.As self-described Gen X "latchkey kids," Etienne, Heidi, and Jane share how their favorite shows shaped their values and worldviews when parents weren't around to do it. Norman Lear's groundbreaking sitcoms tackled racism and social issues before many of us understood these concepts. Charlie's Angels inspired neighborhood play that extended storylines beyond the screen. Fantasy Island taught us to be careful what we wish for. And let's not forget those teenage crushes on Tom Selleck and Ricardo Montalban that led to bedroom wall posters and surreptitious fan mail.Unlike today's on-demand viewing, our television experience was communal—everyone watched the same episode of The Cosby Show or discussed who shot J.R. the next day at school. This shared cultural experience created a unique generational bond that's hard to replicate in today's fragmented media landscape.What's fascinating is discovering which shows hold up decades later and which make us cringe. The hosts explore this dichotomy while watching classics with their own children—from the progressive messaging of All in the Family to the now-shocking casual sexism of Three's Company. The shows that endure (Golden Girls, Cheers, The Twilight Zone) succeed through timeless storytelling, memorable characters, and universal themes that transcend their era.Join this nostalgic yet insightful conversation about the television that raised a generation. What shows shaped your childhood? Share your memories with us at [email protected] or find us on all social platforms.Send us Fan MailEmail us at [email protected], and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

Three women share their most terrifying paranormal encounters and discuss how these experiences shaped their beliefs about the afterlife and energy that persists beyond death.• Did Einstein believe in ghosts?• According to Pew Research, how many Americans have seen a ghost?• Is The U.S. or the U.K. considered the most haunted country in the world?• Heidi had an encounter in a New Orleans bathroom.• Jane witnessed something horrifyingly otherworldly in a field in Kansas• Heidi experienced extreme poltergeist activity for six weeks• Jane found protection from another ghost given to her by her a then-deceased relative• Can you set boundaries with ghosts and paranormal activity?Email us at [email protected], and find us on all social media platforms.Send us Fan MailEmail us at [email protected], and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

What makes sex truly extraordinary? In this episode, we're diving deep into our most unforgettable sexual experiences and uncovering the surprising factors that contribute to mind-blowing intimacy.Recent studies show that many Gen X women are having the best sex of their lives after 45 – and we're here to confirm it! We explore why maturity brings better sexual experiences, from increased body confidence to improved partner selection and willingness to communicate our desires. As Jane reveals, "Sex isn't something that you do but it's a place that you go with somebody that you trust."The conversation takes exciting turns as Etienne shares her strategic affair with a nightclub manager that ended a toxic relationship while delivering multiple orgasms that literally cured her sugar cravings. Heidi recounts her mind-blowing introduction to squirting orgasms with a skilled dominant partner who transformed her understanding of pleasure. And Jane describes a cinematic first-time experience with her high school crush that reads like a John Hughes movie come to life.Throughout our stories, common themes emerge: attentiveness, communication, and responsiveness make all the difference in creating extraordinary sexual experiences. We also discuss practical tips for maintaining excitement in long-term relationships, including Jane's suggestion that lingerie creates a "reframing" effect that keeps things fresh even after decades with the same partner.Whether you're looking to enhance your current relationship or simply enjoy our candid stories, this episode offers insights that might just lead to the best sex of your life. Have you discovered what makes your intimate experiences truly exceptional? We'd love to hear your thoughts!Send us Fan MailEmail us at [email protected], and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

Jane, Heidi, and Etienne share their raw, unfiltered experiences with perimenopause and menopause, discussing the surprising symptoms that signaled their hormonal changes. The conversation tackles everything from unexpected libido surges to emotional volatility, urinary incontinence, and the misconceptions surrounding hormone replacement therapy.Perimenopause can cause an unexpected surge in libido, contrary to common beliefs about declining sex driveWomen can still get pregnant during perimenopause and should continue birth control until fully in menopauseHot flashes, mood swings, and memory issues are common symptoms that can significantly impact quality of lifeHormone levels affect various body systems, with low testosterone contributing to brain fog and mood issuesMany women experience urinary incontinence due to estrogen depletion, which can improve or vanish with hormone therapyMedical misinformation about hormone replacement therapy has left many women suffering unnecessarilyThe book "Estrogen Matters" provides valuable information about hormonal health during menopauseEmail us at [email protected] with your perimenopause and menopause stories, or find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.Send us Fan MailEmail us at [email protected], and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

Our hosts share the books, short stories, and movies they wish they had created themselves, revealing the stories that have influenced them as writers and readers.What Stephen King wished he had written The top three works most writers reportedly wish they'd written Heidi praises a book focused on time travel and a claustrophobic movie Etienne admires a book centered on a hostage situation and an Academy Award winning movie set in Los Angeles Jane highlights 3 authors she loves The hosts discuss books that provoked strong emotional reactions, both hated and loved Real-life survival stories Send us Fan MailEmail us at [email protected], and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

The unexpected phenomenon of "hobosexuals" takes center stage in this eye-opening episode that will have you reconsidering your dating boundaries. We unpack the surprising definition of hobosexuals and you'll be surprised how long this term has been around!Shocking statistics reveal the prevalence of financially motivated dating. The classic warning signs emerge through hilarious personal stories: rapid relationship acceleration, mysterious housing insecurity, and exceptional bedroom skills used as manipulation tools.Our hosts share their close encounters with potential hobosexuals, from the "savant of oral sex" living in a garage with bunk beds to "Pighair," a homeless man who attempted to convert a simple act of kindness (and 13-bean soup) into a permanent living situation. These cautionary tales highlight how these relationship opportunists target empathetic people, particularly caregivers already conditioned to nurture others.What distinguishes hobosexuals from sugar relationships is the element of deception rather than explicit understanding. As we navigate modern dating's complexities, perhaps our most valuable takeaway is this: whether you're living alone or with roommates, be wary of anyone who seems more interested in your address than in you. Have you encountered a hobosexual? Share your stories with us on social media or email ([email protected])Send us Fan MailEmail us at [email protected], and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

Remember stumbling upon that mysterious stack of magazines hidden in your parents' closet? You're not alone. In this candid, often hilarious conversation, Etty, Jane, and Heidi--three Gen X women--share their first encounters with adult content and how these formative experiences potentially shaped their sexual preferences and perspectives.The hosts reflect on how finding erotic materials as curious pre-teens and teenagers created lasting impressions that influenced their adult relationships and desires.Beyond personal anecdotes, the episode explores surprising research findings that challenge common assumptions about pornography, sparking thoughtful discussion about authenticity in adult entertainment and how performative expressions of pleasure might create unrealistic expectations.The conversation takes a deeper turn when considering how today's easily accessible online content might be shaping younger generations' sexual expectations. The hosts express concern about the prevalence of certain themes in mainstream pornography while acknowledging the importance of open, honest conversations about sex and media literacy.What makes this discussion unique is the balance of humor, vulnerability, and thoughtful reflection. These women aren't just sharing embarrassing stories—they're examining how early exposures influenced their understanding of sexuality, pleasure, and relationships in ways both subtle and profound.Ready to reflect on your own formative experiences? Share your stories with us at [email protected] or connect with us on social media. Join the conversation as we continue exploring the complex intersections of sex, relationships, and personal growth through the lens of creative Gen X women.Send us Fan MailEmail us at [email protected], and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

Our hosts share personal stories about their experiences with psychedelics, from accidental first trips to intentional journeys with shamans, including insights on therapeutic potential and safety.• Etienne, Jane, and Heidi share their fun and/or interesting facts for this episode• Jane's first LSD experience happened accidentally at a Grateful Dead concert at age 16• Etienne's three-day acid trip at 21 with the "Ken Kesey acid" led to a surprising romance and creative epiphany• Heidi didn't try psychedelics until age 50 but has had profound experiences with mushrooms and ayahuasca• Ayahuasca ceremonies provided healing, visions of fractal patterns, and spirit guide encounters• Recent research shows psychedelics' therapeutic potential despite their Schedule 1 classification• Mushrooms rank as one of the safest substances, contradicting their legal status• Safety tips: have trusted companions, a sober trip sitter, and approach with intentionSend us Fan MailEmail us at [email protected], and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

What makes someone become a writer? For the three Gen X hosts of Women Are Plotting, their creative origins trace back to childhood—creating elaborate storylines for Barbies, convincing neighborhood kids a shark lurked in a backyard pond, and discovering the thrilling power of bringing imaginary worlds to life with nothing but words.This debut episode reveals the fascinating, often winding paths that led Etienne, Jane, and Heidi to writing. From the four-year-old who realized she could transport others with her stories to the aspiring filmmaker who discovered screenwriting through a scheduling conflict, each journey demonstrates that creativity finds its expression against all odds. With delightful asides about Stephen King sleeping with the lights on and Ray Bradbury being "knighted" by a carnival performer, this episode celebrates the quirky inspirations that fuel creativity. The hosts make a compelling case for why authentic human storytelling—born from lived experience—will always connect with readers in ways artificial intelligence never can.Whether you're a writer yourself or simply curious about the creative process, this warm, honest conversation invites you into the world where ideas exist as living entities, searching for the right vessel to bring them to life. Subscribe to The Women Are Plotting for more insights into creativity, writing, and the stories we tell ourselves.Send us Fan MailEmail us at [email protected], and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.