Borrowing time, borrowing sanity

There are no prizes for coping. So why are we trying to do this on our own?I’ve been thinking about this a lot, because I think one of the biggest sources of stress in parenting isn’t just what we’re doing - it’s the feeling that it’s all on us. And it isn’t meant to be.I remember a time when my children were younger and everything felt relentless. No sleep, constant noise, work, emotions, the lot. And a friend said, very casually, “Why don’t we just swap for a couple of hours?” She took my children. I took hers the next day. And those few hours felt like a revelation. Not because I did anything extraordinary, but because I stopped. And eventually we made it regular - and even agreed that part of that time had to be a proper break, not just catching up on everything we hadn’t done.Because that’s the trap, isn’t it? When we finally get a moment, we fill it.But what if we didn’t? What if we let ourselves be supported instead?Somewhere along the line, many of us picked up the idea that we should be able to manage it all - our children, our homes, our work - without needing help. And that if we do need help, we’re not coping. But the opposite is true. Parenting works better when it’s shared. When we borrow time, borrow energy, borrow each other’s sanity.So maybe this isn’t about doing more. Maybe it’s about asking more.One small swap. One shared afternoon. Asking more often, could you…?Because we were never meant to do this alone.Thank you for pausing with me. Take care. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit kimmccabe.substack.com/subscribe