Really, Flaubert?: Wednesday, June 12th, 2024

Good morning, millennials. Welcome back to The Toast, and happy Wednesday, and gorgeous. It's such a gorgeous, gorgeous day here at The Toast. It's a celebratory day. We're humping the ones that we love. We're halfway through the week, honestly. The hardest is definitely behind us. It is. It's true. We're humping, even though Romeo and Bruno are not in studio today. Sorry to your eyes on the YouTube. It's just us. Ugly old hags. Yeah, sorry. Real eyes, real eyes, real lies. Which is that. Bruno and Romeo should be here. They should be here. They should be here. Standing with their paws around me here. Have we sang that before?

Not pause. No, I actually think we have. I'm having a toast to deja vu. Maybe we've been podcasting too long. Maybe we've been podcasting too long. Do you get deja vu as like a clinical symptom? As somebody who doesn't possess the ability to remember anything, like memory is not something I currently possess. No, I've never experienced deja vu, which is so sad because it sounds like a trip. It is. And maybe because my memory is too strong, I have deja vu all the time. And it's a hard feeling to explain, but it's like I've been in this moment feeling these feelings, thinking these thoughts.

It's really a trip, man. Like the way you describe it, I'm jealous, you know? I love feeling things. But you know what's also a weird thing to think about? Like what if what I think is deja vu isn't deja vu? Because like we all can just describe what deja vu is to one another. But what if we're just feeling like different things? What if I'm just like going through something else? Okay, I thought what you were going to say, which I think is like a better take on deja vu, was like what if it's not deja vu that you're feeling? What if you haven't experienced this moment before? Perhaps you've experienced it in another life. Oh, okay. Yeah, that's what some people say. You know, your reincarnated self has been here.

Perhaps if you believe in reincarnation, but no, like I'm so grounded in my deja vu. Like I know it's been in this life when I'm feeling it. I'm like, oh, that feels like I just, you've had to be there to know the feeling. It's really something you cannot describe. Do you have any recurring dreams? Yeah, recurring themes in dreams. No, like the same dream. Not the same dream, but like something in the dream will be happening. That happens a lot in my dreams. Yeah, no, that's not really what I was asking.

Okay. But you have the same dream ever. No, no, I said no. Do you? I have. That sounds like a nightmare. No, no, no, no. I have. And I keep waiting for it to come back. I'm like, now I'm like, I'm onto it. And I need him to come back. Is having the same dream twice a recurring dream? Ooh, like two nights in a row? Or like once in your adolescence and once, you know? I don't think that's a recurring dream. I think like people who go to sleep every night and like that's recurring. Does that happen to people? What does that mean? What does that say about them?

I really think my dreams are, like, seriously some of the most fascinating storytelling of our generation. And the fact that, like, my dreams are, first of all, only seen by me and barely remembered. Or so you think. Or are barely remembered. It's a travesty. Like, Steven Spielberg thinks he knows what good movies are. He's never seen my dreams. They're unbelievable. They're so crazy delusional. And they're extremely telling of, like, how I think of myself. Do you know what I mean? Explain. Like, in every dream, I'm a star, you know?

Okay. What are you doing? Being a star. All these celebrities want to be my friend. All these celebrities want to date me. I have at least three dreams a week where a really handsome leading man is chasing after me. But in my dreams, I'm married. And in my dreams, I stay loyal. I'm like, Zac Efron, I literally can't date you. I'm married. Yeah. So then is it hard to wake up? No, because I wake up to my husband who I didn't cheat on even in my dreams. I'm so loyal. No, but then there's no Zac Efron. Not the waking up, but the going about your day. Is your dream life more fabulous than your regular life? That's a good question. Sometimes, yeah.

Sometimes, yeah, I can't lie. But I feel like it's, you know, the ebb and flow because sometimes your dream life is a nightmare. And so it's like, okay, that's not my real life, but also this isn't my real life. I'll just take my real life, thanks. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's good. It's good. Because if you have your dream life, then you also have your nightmare life. So true. So I'll stay here on this planet. And I definitely had some interesting dreams because I watched a sort of a titillating film before bed. Nobody recommended it to me on my journey of...

historical nonfiction or whatever. But I did watch a trailer for Cinderella Man because you brought it up and it sounded good. And seriously, me and Ben were like, I bet this movie's good. It's one of the worst, most piece of shit trailers on the planet. To make a movie look bad in a trailer is actually hard. And it made us not want to watch it, so we literally didn't. I don't know if I would recommend you watch it. Oh. I was just talking about it. I don't know why I saw it. Everyone in the comments was like, you have to watch Cinderella. Oh. I think you're okay. I don't think so. And then I went to watch Miracle, which you had suggested about the Soviet hockey game. It's a decom. Did you know that? Yeah. It's a decom in the same way that we are, what's that Denzel Washington football movie?

Remember the Titans is, you know? Right, or like Secretariat. Yeah, so it's like a high budget. It was in theaters produced by the Disney Channel, you know? And again, Ben was not convinced at all. What? I feel like he would be for that. Also, remember the Titans, Secretariat, Mighty Ducks. Those are all fire movies. I think Ben was really, and I was in a similar boat, completely disinterested in the Cold War. We were on the same page in the sense that we know very little about it. But then I did convince him to watch a Cold War movie that actually looked good. It was called Bridge of Spies. I think it was a recent Oscar contender. Spielberg film, Tom Hanks, who I just loathe. Seriously, I was watching the movie and I was like...

You will never be Vargas Gump. Like, you'll never, like, just stop. You know? He was bothering me a lot. Although the movie was good, and it was based on a true story, and the credits had some fun facts, which, you know, is the telltale sign of a good movie. It was about, you know, spies during the Cold War, communism, et cetera, et cetera. It was good stuff. I actually really enjoyed it, and I did learn a little bit. Not a lot. I learned a little bit. Okay. Are you interested in exploring this time even more? Well, I was more so interested in the man that Tom Hanks played. He was just, like, this, you know, Brooklyn lawyer, nothing special, and how he ended up being, like, the lead negotiator for, like, hostages and spies in the U.S. was through this, you know.

happenstance moment that happens in the movie. I don't want to spoil it. And so I liked learning about that. But like Rush It's Up, actually everyone was like really pissing me off. Because I guess I learned yesterday that it was called the Cold War because it was kind of cold. You know, there was no like battles. Action.

It should really be called the paranoia, where everybody was so on edge, so paranoid about, oh, there's Russian spies in the sewers. There's Russian spies in the phone. It's like, nobody cares about you, actually. Calm down. It was giving drama queen energy. Well, I think they do. Is that called the red scare? They know that they were scared. Oh, yeah. And then all the kids in school are learning how to survive an atomic bomb. And it's like, again, nobody cares about you. We're not dropping a bomb on you. It was just getting very much everybody making it about themselves. Or maybe because of diplomatic relations, those things didn't come to pass. So then it does look a little dramatic. But if it had happened, it wouldn't have been dramatic. It actually wouldn't have been enough. Yeah.

The red scare is a period of public fear and anxiety over the supposed rise of communist or socialist ideologies in a non-communist state. I feel like we, you know, we have the luxury of looking back and being like, oh, that was dramatic because maybe like things went as they should. But if it had, if people didn't do their parts, it wouldn't have been so scared. Like maybe there should have been more of a Nazi scare, don't you think? Yeah, and then Ben and I got to talking about communism. Because we also watched Oppenheimer and it was like, oh my God, if you had even like the smell of communism on you, you were seriously like expelled from social circles, academia. It was like the worst fucking thing you could have. And my question is this. One, like why were we so afraid of communism back then?

Do you know? I'm asking you. Like, yeah, we could think people who, like, believe that were, like, wacky and dumb. But, like, we were literally afraid. Yeah. Well, I guess because there was, like, it depends on what level. Like, if he was in government and are you a spy for a communist regime that is our enemy and we're in, like, a war with them. And were we in a war with them because they were communists? Or, like, was other stuff going on? There was other stuff. Like, we were never the tightest of friends. But then in World War II, like, we came together for a moment to defeat the Nazis. That was major, major key. But then we, like, went back to doing our own things and our own ways of life. And I think, like, you know, they're always concerned that...

we're concerned that their ideas are going to bleed over here and they're concerned we're going to bring democracy over there so it was just like stay in your lane and then my other question is like how did we go from one extreme to the other you know in such a short period of time it's like you seriously if you even breathe the word communist in the wrong circles like your life was over like seriously they killed people like literally put them to death that's fine and now it's like kind of hip to be communist like I just don't understand like seriously and I guess that's just history repeating itself like that's how these things start but like how did we get here how did we get out how do we get out is a major question um yeah I don't know when maybe after the cold war that's when like People just loosened their... Vibes. Vibes around communism. And I think as time passes, people forget how bad communism actually is, what it means to live under communism. Yeah. And they think it's like this utopian...

society where it's not. Communism has never worked anywhere, not once. And look at the places that have employed it. But I think the further away you get from it, the younger generation, they're like, what if we are equal? Well, so I actually was just seeing this on TikTok, like this generation of, you know, first generation Americans whose parents were immigrants who fled like communist countries and like these horrible conditions for a better life so they could send their kids to college. To become communists. Yeah. It's the circle. The circle of life.

It's true. Have you ever heard the saying? I love sayings, by the way. This is a really good saying, and I want to get the order of it right. So let me just pull up a quote card. Here it is. Hard times create strong men. Strong men create good times. Good times create weak men. And weak men create hard times. I think that's where we are. I think we're in the weak men part.

You not heard that one before? No. I love a good phrase. What would you say is your favorite phrase of the moment that you find yourself using a lot? And I just want to say, like, you could say it creates strong people, like, if you want to get it. Yeah, because that's definitely, like, a little bit archaic. Okay, hard times create strong people. Strong people create good. That works for me, too. Yeah, that makes more sense, like, in modern. And I think as a woman, it applies to me, too. Yeah. Like, hard times make me strong. So true. You're so strong. Good times make me weak. And weak times make hard. Me creates hard times. Okay, whatever. What is a phrase like you, what's your phrase of the moment?

I feel like you could tell me what my phrase at the moment is better than I could tell you listening to me. Tink says a good phrase that I haven't been saying a lot, but I've been thinking a lot. Holding on to anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die. That's a good one. I love it. But it's easier said than done. I think a little bit of anger is always good. I also don't agree with it. I am alive because of my anger. My anger propels me forward. It's like drinking a poison that's like a drug elixir. It's not going to kill you. For me, holding on to anger is like drinking a Red Bull. It's heavenly. But that is technically poison, but you're on another level. I'm on another level.

Yeah. No, someone also said that on a reality show recently, and it stuck with me. Of course, I'm living in your bloom where you're planted moment. Of course. And also one that I love that I feel like I haven't mentioned in a few years, but I think the people need to know again, and I got it from Robin on Peloton. Sometimes self-care looks like hard work. You do love that one. I would absolutely love if everybody could sound off in the comments, either on YouTube or on our Instagram. Like, what is your favorite phrase? What's a phrase like a motto? I'm always looking for new mottos. I feel like I put a motto on my notes app on my computer because I like read it in a newsletter.

Oh, wow. She's whipping out her computer if you guys aren't watching YouTube. What? It's here. I don't know why I saved it. Okay. It's from someone named Flaubert. F-L-A-U-B-R-T. It's from someone named Really Bert. Really Flaubert. You guys, can we tell that story? Yeah. I've been saying it all day. And I'm going to try and figure out why I saved this quote. Okay, what was the phrase? No, Claudia, I don't want to say this. Are you embarrassed? Share it. Share it. Share it. Share it. Share it. I will. I will. But I just want you to know, like.

I don't, I don't know. Is this your bonnui moment? Okay, really Flaubert? Really Bert? This is the quote. Oh my God. And it's recent too. And I think I read it. The only newsletter I get is the free press. So it was in one of their articles and I just, it resonated with me. Are you guys ready? I don't know. Let's go.

This is like you sharing your yearbook quote. Oh, did I ever? You did. Oh, no, you texted it to me. No, I think I said it on Patreon. No, you texted it to me. Yeah, okay. Honestly, why did you have to bring that up? Because I had deja vu because I remember this feeling. I'm ashamed. Because the deja vu reminded me of this feeling of what it's like to share a quote that you don't really like stand by except mine's like three weeks old. Okay. Be settled in your life and as ordinary as the bourgeoisie in order to be violent and original in your work. Wait, what? Say it again. I literally don't get it.

Be settled in your life and as ordinary as the bourgeois in order to be violent and original in your work. No, that's honestly worse than Broadway. Wait, I feel like, though, I understood. I'm going to find the article that I was a part of because maybe that will give context to what this meant to me. Okay, I can't find it. I feel like reading it, I understand why I liked it for a second, but to go out of my way to save it to my notes. That's humiliating. Seriously, that is the craziest thing. I feel like I like the message where it's like, live an ordinary life and then do crazy things in your work, in your creative outlet. No, I like that.

But to save it. She's literally a podcaster. I take my job seriously. I take my creativity seriously. But to save it. Really, Flaubert. Okay, you guys. Like, a couple of weeks ago. As always. Like, all day. We're always sending pictures in our family chat. Like, of what's going on. The dogs. The kids. And Olivia sent this video of her kids. And it was so cute. And I'm watching it. And they're just, like, playing with each other. And McKayla gets really in her brother's face. Like, really up in his face. And what came out of her mouth was seriously, like, the last thing I would have. And she said it with, like, kind of a British accent. She goes, really, Bert?

And I said to Olivia, I was like, what the fuck is Burt? Like, who is Burt? And she was like, it's a line from Mary Poppins. It's like the kid's favorite movie of the moment. She's like, Olivia wasn't shocked by it. I, seriously? It was the most shocking thing. If she had said, like, nothing could have shocked anymore. Really, Burt? Really, Burt? She sounded like Moira Rose. Yeah.

Really, Bert? And I'm like, yeah. No, by the way, she is endlessly inspiring to me. Endlessly quotable. And I wonder, do, like, other people, and this is just who we are. We do it with each other, so, like, it makes sense that we do it with the kids now. But, like, do other people quote their children and, like, as much as we do? Are other people doing it? Right. Like, what is Koja doing? Doing. Like, I don't know if you start to talk like your kids, but it's honestly so fun. Really, Bert? Really?

So I don't know how we got here. Flaubert. Flaubert, the quote of the moment. So I wouldn't say that's my quote of the moment though. No, okay. We have an amazing show today. We've got stories, we've got Fast Five, we've got fun. We do. Anything else you want to chat about before we dive in? No, I just want to Google who Flaubert was while she's a communist. No, literally Marx's friend. Okay, Gustave Flaubert was a French novelist. He has been considered the leading exponent of literary realism in his country and abroad.

We stand. We have no choice but to stand. Oh, he wrote Madame Bovary. I meant to tell you, a movie I almost watched before Bridge of Spies that was seriously too heavy, and I couldn't, was Sarah's Key. Because you know I've never seen it. And I've never read a book or a movie about that incident in France with the soccer stadium. The Vendome? The Vendome, where they put 15,000 Jews in and left them in that stadium to die, and they just literally died of starvation. Yeah.

like just left in there and then the whole like town smelled for like a year of like dead corpses they just seriously like put like 15,000 people in this room to die um and I I've been like wanting to I like want to know more about it but it's so graphic that's what Sarah's Key is about it's referenced I think it's a story of someone from that um thing it's um a modern day journalist finds her life becoming entwined with a young girl whose family was torn apart during the notorious Veldiv roundup and it's like it's a part of the uh holocaust like people don't talk about because it low-key like wasn't the nazis it was like people in france who were just like i'm sick of these jews let's put them in this soccer stadium the french didn't need a lot of convincing no they needed none they were like how can we help no no that's a line from reba that seriously made me laugh so hard it's like barba jean okay barba jean i sent you a video of it do you remember no whatever barba jean and her husband like are like planning to Like have a hard conversation with someone. And the second they sit down, the husband like rolls over and is just like, so the person leaves it forward and she turns around and she's like, thanks a lot, France. Oh my God, it's so unexpected. It's so funny. And yeah, you're right. Like it's, it was 100% accurate. Yeah. This is, by the way, a history podcast. Yeah. We have different eras, of course. I think we all remember fondly our sports era. And I think that is definitely, you know, due for a renaissance with football season, you know, coming soon. But we're definitely, I feel like you've been trying to make this a history podcast and I've been like trying to tell you to shut the fuck up for like three years. Now it's definitely a history podcast. Is it history fascinating, Law? It is. It really is. It's, it's maddening.

It is maddening. But what's so crazy, as they say, history repeats itself. And, you know, it's never word for word, but it rhymes. That's in a more succinct quote, but I... Oh, wait, say it again? Like, hold on. Let me get the proper quote. This is just like, are we a quote card? Are we a quote podcast? Hold on. I like that. History doesn't repeat itself. It rhymes. Yeah, Mark Twain. History doesn't repeat itself, but it often rhymes. Right, like similar vibes is what Mark Twain was trying to say. Right, it's never going to be apples to apples, but...

It rhymes. It's going to be green apples to yellow apples. Because also, the nature of human beings is the same. I feel like you look back at people from hundreds of years ago and you're like, I could never be that. They were horrible people. And you think you live in the best, most moral generation. And then, oh, it turns out, oh, you would have actually been a Nazi. No, and then also you think now, in 100 years, when we are in history that people are learning about, what are we doing now? Commonplace things like slavery. Claudia, I know what they are. You do? Yeah. But they're so commonplace, you can't even speak out against them. Wow, chilling. Chilling stuff.

Oh, my God. I forgot to share something so major that happened to me. What? Sabrina Carpenter reposted one of my TikToks. What do you mean? There's a repost feature on TikTok. I don't know if you know that. It's like retweet on X? Exactly. And she reposted one of my TikToks. I was using her song. Please, please, please. Skin? No, I wish. Please, please, please. How many times did she repost stuff? I'm not sure, but the impact was there. It had about 200,000 views, and now it's at over three. Yeah. Over 300,000? Yeah. Oh. What were you doing in the video? Singing and dancing to Please, Please, Please. Oh, cool.

And I just like happened to look particularly gorgeous. Like it was naturally lit. I love that for you. I'm happy for you. Yeah. Mazel. Thanks. Okay. Now I think I can close out of all my red scare tabs. Yeah. And we can get into the fast five stories that you need to know. And the fast five stories that you need to know are brought to you by GNC. So as you guys know, medications, GLP-1 medications are taking the world by storm, helping many people transform their lives through weight loss. Like myself, I had a fabulous experience. But as you guys know, being on those medications, but also being off those medications afterwards, it require a lot of things to help sustain, keep hunger off. If you have any side effects while on the medication, you know how important supplements can be.

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heartfelt gift that you'll all cherish for years, StoryWorth. Right now, save $10 on your first purchase when you go to storyworth.com slash toast. That's storyworth.com slash toast to save 10% on your purchase. Today's episode is also brought to you by BetterHelp. Thank you, BetterHelp, for sponsoring today's episode. When life goes fast, it's important to take a moment to celebrate your wins and make adjustments for the rest of the year. Therapy can help you take stock of your progress and set achievable goals for the next six months. So if you're thinking of starting therapy, give BetterHelp a try. Perhaps this is a sign you've been looking for. Why BetterHelp is different is it's therapy done entirely online. It's designed to be convenient, flexible, and suited to your schedule. How it works if you want to sign up is you'll go online and fill out a very brief questionnaire, and then you'll get matched with a licensed therapist. What sets BetterHelp apart, I think, from a lot of other therapy options is it's really easy to change therapists because sometimes...

in person online like it's very personal you know you need to have a good personality match and you know there's nothing wrong with this therapist but it's just not a match for you and they make it really easy and like not awkward to change therapists in person it's like so painful um so you can switch therapists at any time and there's no additional charge for that so take a moment visit betterhelp.com slash toast today you'll get 10 off your first month when you use our link that's betterhelp h-e-l-p dot com slash toast betterhelp.com slash t-o-a-s-t there's really never a bad time to give therapy a start and if you've been wanting to start therapy and you just kind of needed a nudge perhaps let turdy be your nudge i nudge you enjoy thank you better help for sponsoring today's episode thank you turdy You're welcome, Jackie. By the way, of course on my phone I have a list of quotes that we like that you make me start a list. And some of them are more like phrases and they're like TikTok-y, but one that we love that I just want to resurface, never interrupt your enemy when he's making a mistake. Obsessed. Obsessed beyond. And then I also have on another tab called quotes from April 2020, just one quote. April 2020. That's how long ago it is. But where were we during April 2020? That was the beginning of COVID, right? Yeah. So this makes us extra sad. Right, right. Context is important.

This is all it says. I'm shining like fireworks over your sad, empty town. Yikes. That's, like, not, like, a quote. It's a lyric. And of all the ones, why did we write that one down? Because of all, like, the Taylor Swift, like, for me, there are Taylor Swift lyrics that, seriously, like, I live by. One of them being, I could be able to cast a lot of all the bricks they threw at me. Dear reader, bend when you can, snap when you have to. That's me. Yeah, you introduced me to that one. And, of course, my favorite one, my favorite one, like, of all time. Pass me. I want to tell you not to get lost in these petty things. Your nemeses will defeat themselves before you get the chance to swing.

Chilling. Chilling. We should actually keep a list of like Taylor lyrics that like really. And I guess that first one can start out the list. It's cute. I like it. I'm trying like fireworks over here. It's a nice visual. People love rocks. People throw rocks at things that shine. Yeah. You can definitely get like an apron with that on Etsy. Yeah. Like if you're a person in this world. If you're a person in this world who has even one hater. There is a Taylor Swift lyric for you. Like a lot of them are about like scrutiny. But I guess even if you're not a person like with haters. Like in your life you have like detractors. Yeah. Yeah.

Okay, well now let's get into the stories. Our first story, Ariana Grande is on Penn Badgley's podcast called Pod Crush and she's talking about Quiet On Set. Oh my God. Yes. So Ariana says that the environment needs to be made safer for kids in the industry and believes therapy should be mandatory. So she went on Penn Badgley's podcast called Pod Crush, which was released today. So there's a lot of quotes coming out. I haven't had a chance to watch it, but.

There's a lot that she's talking about. She talked about the docuseries Quiet on Set, and this is what she said, quote, A lot of people don't have the support that they need to get through performing at that level at such a young age, but also dealing with some of the things that the survivors who have come forward. There's not a word for how devastating that is to hear. I think that the environment needs to be made safer if kids are going to be acting, and I think there should be therapists. I think there should be parents allowed to be wherever they want to be, she continued, adding that parents should be permitted everywhere, not only on kids' sets. She said, I think if anybody wants to do this or music or anything at that level of exposure that it means to be on TV or to do music with a major label or whatever, it should be in the contract.

She said that young performers are vulnerable to reactions to their performances from adults on set, which creates a quote, strange pattern that occurs where it's really taking advantage of how much it means to the young performer to get a laugh from Video Village. You're like, oh shit, I'm doing something great. Like this is funny. This is good. But she recognized that she's speaking from her own experience on the show, noting how she and her castmates push the envelope with their humor. She said, quote, and the innuendos were like, we were told and convinced as well that it was.

the cool differentiation. And I don't know, I think it all just happened so quickly. And now looking back on some of those clips, I'm like, that's damn, really? The things that weren't approved for the network were snuck onto like our website or whatever it was. And that is another, that's another discovery, but I'm going into it. I guess I'm upset. She said, she believes that for those pursuing these career trajectories with large scales, there should be an element that is mandatory of therapy of a professional person to unpack what this experience of your life changing so drastically does to you at a young age or at any age.

Yeah. I honestly never thought we would hear her take on it because the window of speaking out I thought had passed. I think doing it on a podcast is a fabulous medium for it. And I think her and Penn Badgey oddly have a friendship. He's in the music video she just released. So they're obviously working together and she obviously felt comfortable enough to agree to go on his podcast and talk about this. So I, first of all, love this friendship. I kind of ship. How did they meet, do you think?

Do you think his music, from his music, Muthixer? No, no. Maybe she's a really big fan of his TV show. I feel like the new show on Netflix. I feel like she'd be a bigger fan of you than of Gossip Girl. Yeah, for sure. Yeah, that's Ari. So, interesting. I didn't really put together that weird footage from the iCarly and whatever website that they showed in the documentary was footage that was not approved by the network. That's really scary. Yeah, and I feel like when we were talking about Quiet On Set, of course you want to hear from the big people who are still around.

what their thoughts on the documentary or just their overall experience. But then with Ariana, like there was also that piece of like those videos for the website. And overall, it seems like she had a, she looks back on her time finally, like she's still close with Dan Schneider, I think. So I think now she might be like looking at it from a different lens though. I think that happens a lot. Like, and especially when you're a kid, like you don't remember everything that ever happened to you as a kid. That's like just a part of childhood. And so for it to be played out in a documentary and sort of like explained to you, it's like weird, but it's like something happened to you. You were there, but you can see it differently now as an adult. Like it does make sense. Like now she's angry. Whereas before maybe she didn't even think about it. Yeah. Cause that's what you do. That's like human nature to like be a kid. I think it's like a means of like protecting yourself. You just sort of keep going. Yeah. But you also just like trust that the adults know what they're doing. Yeah. And that they're looking out for you.

Yeah. So yeah, interesting that she went on Penn Badgley's podcast, but I think his podcast is new too. No, it's like a couple of years old. Really? He's always randomly like making waves with it because a couple of months ago he had Taylor Momsen on and they talked about like, you know, Dan and Jenny and it was, everyone was, you know, loving it. And he gets very good guests. People really, it's called Podcrushed, right? Yeah, yeah. People really like it. It's big on TikTok. What does the name mean? Do you know? I am so glad you asked. I don't know. Because I feel like that's like a name of a podcast that like a generic podcast network would put out about like, you know.

Something silly. I don't know. He seems not silly. He seems like he takes himself serious. Yeah, and it's in-depth interviews, and they tackle serious stuff a lot, so I don't know. Yeah, it's hard to come up with a name for your podcast, though. I'm always surprised when people do it, because everyone starts a podcast every day, and some people get really good names for themselves. I'm like, oh, nice, that's good. Oh, I'm so glad you brought up this conversation, because I wanted to talk about, you know, Teresa Giudice rebranded her podcast, and I have to say her previous podcast was called Namaste Bitches. I would say probably top three worst podcast names you ever could have come up with, especially this is a person who has so much lore, so many words-associated phrases, merch-y type things. She couldn't have come up with a worse name for her podcast.

If she tried, like seriously, a piece of duty would have been a better name than Namaste Bitches. And that was because one season she did yoga and she's rebranded it now, which is much needed to a fabulous name called Turning the Tables. I saw a clip from Turning the Tables on my feed this morning and I didn't know, I actually like meant to, I watched the clip and we just talked about her, like it was 10 seconds, she was talking about how she never thought Housewives would be what it is. So I thought maybe it was like a book or something. I didn't realize that she rebranded her podcast. It's a much better name.

Do you want to play a fun game? Yeah. Going through podcast names? Okay. Like other shows. I feel like someone. I have a hot take. Okay. I think seriously one of the worst titled podcasts is smart list. It's literally not a word. Like I don't fucking get it. Damn turdy. Hmm. Let's go. Oh, I like vile files. That's always a strong one. You know what I like? And I like it also because of history as a name. I think Giggly squad is like the funniest, cutest name. Yeah. And it's like Kyle's called them that on the show. I never saw that episode. Jackie, never interrupt your enemies when they're what?

Making a mistake. That was Larry Kyle Cook. Like, he handed them this gorgeous platter of, like, giggly, like, everything. Genius. Yeah. Real good. What are other, like, the Joe Rogan Experience? That's not an amazing podcast. Nobody calls it that. It's not about the, when you're a personality and you just have, like, the blank show, that's fine by me. You don't need to, like, reinvent the wheel. But I do think some people, like, really pigeonhole themselves with, like, really niche names. I agree. Now I'm looking at Top. Oh, there we are. The Toast, the cutest name. Wait, I gotta.

What is this? And I also, like, I don't want to, like, shade anyone, so I'll just. Oh, I do. Okay. I'm on my way to the charts. Okay, I'm here. Oh, you know whose name I think is bad? And she's always at the top? Julia Louis-Dreyfus. Wiser than me? Yeah. Wiser than me? I don't mind it, because I think the premise is, like, talking to wise, older people. You know what I think is a good name? Armchair expert. I actually think it's an excellent name. That is an excellent name. Of course, our favorite, Huberman Lab. So good. Two bears, one cave is funny. Throwback. Oh, what about two teas and a pod?

I don't like it at all. Like, really, I don't. But it's not held them back from finding success in this space. It hasn't. How did we get here? Oh, pod crushed. Pod crushed. Yeah, exactly. Crushed. Okay. We could do this another time. Are you sure? I mean, don't let me interrupt you, leisurely scrolling on your phone. I'm enjoying it. Yeah, but the ones that are cringe, like, I don't want to call them out. I don't even know these people. And they're trying to make it in the industry. Like, it's not for me to put them down. Okay, so Ari has spoken. Thank you to Ari.

Are you ready for our next story? A little engagement news. The 1975's Maddie Healy is engaged to model Gabriette Bechdel. As in the Bechdel test? That's what I was thinking. Interesting. Do we pass the Bechdel test? For sure. We broke the Bechdel test. Yeah, we literally set the standard for the Bechdel test. This story does not pass the Bechdel test. Because the only woman involved is centered around a man. But you know what? Fine, that doesn't mean it's not... Not everything has to pass the Bechdel test. No, no. Excuse us for being girly. We pass the Bechdel test. It's just...

a level above right what kind of test is that I don't know and it's like why can we stop monitoring like what women want to talk about it's so no but I think it's meant to be you know things that are created by anyone man or woman you know I get it in like yeah in like movies and film and art but like in my life like if me and my girl just want to sit around and talk about guys like we're fine and also I don't think every movie needs to pass the Bechdel test like I think there are stories about men where the women like no offense or just like their wives right right but I think there are also stories about women where the men no offense are just their husbands and also if we want like real equality what's the Bechdel test for men The Mechdel test. The Mechdel test. I guess we don't need it because everything would pass. It is the point. Yeah. Maddie Healy's engaged to his girlfriend, Gabriette, Bechdel test. The two announced their engagement late Tuesday night after attending mutual friend Charlie XCX's Brat Show in Brooklyn with Bechdel test sharing photos of herself wearing the ring featuring a black gem surrounded by pavé diamonds around both the Stoneman band. She said marrying the 1975 is very brat. Now.

I don't care, you know, like, what this person does in his personal life. I don't know this woman. I'm sorry to this woman. But I, of course, you know, it begs the question, how does Taylor Swift feel about this? And Taylor Swift is so happy in her life. Like, she's at the height of her career. She's in this amazing relationship. But I definitely think this news, like, still penetrates. Because, and we know this from her work, marriage is something, like, that's deeply important to her. Like, she wants to get married. It was a huge, I think, reason why her and Joe didn't end up working out. And in a lyric from TTPD, she says that Maddie Healy, like...

would put an imaginary ring on her finger and it's a closest outcome to my heart exploding. Like, I feel like this hurts. I feel like, not to take away from any of this, and I don't know these people, so this is just like my take as like, you know, giving the content that was given to me. So I got CTPD and then a few, a month and a half later, I'm getting an engagement announcement from the person who was like in the album saying that like he couldn't commit, like no ring, smallest man who ever lived. And like, maybe he would have been getting married to Bechtel Test anyway, but I feel like this sort of is good PR against the narrative of the album. Oh, you think this is his way of combating the narrative? Of just being like,

Yeah, no, I'm not that guy. Look, I got engaged. Perhaps. Perhaps. Not to take away. And maybe they still would have gotten engaged, you know? But it definitely kind of shuts down some of the claims on the album if he's settling down now. And the timing just makes you think. Yeah. Yeah. And this is also the Instagram star that she references also in another lyric. Oh, really? Yeah. If you have babies with an internet star, it's the same girl. So that's cool. Yeah. I just, I feel like it doesn't hurt his camp.

That, like, now he's gotten serious with this person. I don't feel like he has, like, a camp. Like, I don't think he plays into it. That's sort of his thing. That's why he's super controversial and, you know, kind of disliked in some circles. Not his camp. Because he's this sort of renegade. Not his people, but it helps him. His image. Image, yeah. Yeah. That he's, like, settling down and not the person that maybe she made him out to be on the album if he's doing something like this. But maybe he's doing, like, something like this because of what was said. Did you see this?

press conference where Travis was asked, like, it's for football, and he was asked. Yeah, it's our next story. Oh, are you ready? God, okay, not me having my finger on the pulse. Also, all of our stories need to pass the Swiftile test. Like, can we make this story not about Taylor Swift? Yeah, no, there actually is, like, a huge...

line of thinking when it comes to Taylor's stories. Because we can have a Taylor story every single day. Now, we don't want that. Like, there's some people who don't want to talk about Taylor Swift, which is so crazy. So it's a delicate balance. It's an equation. Yeah, of when to select, when to not. But Travis had a press conference. Of course, he was asked about Miss Taylor. And he was asked the question, like, what do you and Taylor cook? There's a video. Taylor did a partnership with YouTube Shorts. And it's like this compilation of moments in her life, I would say, over like the last year, put to her music. And in this, everyone has deconstructed the video like a thousand times. And they pulled this moment where she's cooking on the stove and Travis comes over and kisses her. It's so cute.

Yes. And so the reporter asked what he likes to make with her in the kitchen based on that video. And he said, I respect that question, but I'm going to keep that one to myself. It's something I'd rather just keep personal. Then at the end of the interview, he circled back to the question as he exited the stage and he told the audience, Taylor makes a great pop tart and cinnamon roll. Okay. Now I want to start off by saying the state of journalism across all sectors, you know, it's not just sports, it's all journalism, but this is a perfect example. Like seriously.

a bad question, a dumb question. Seriously, just like disgraceful. I'm sorry, it is disrespectful. Like this person is up there for their skill of football. Like to ask like a roundabout, we would be mad if they did it to a woman. And you know, it's disrespectful. Like he's not there to talk about Taylor. Like, and so any question about Taylor is annoying in this scenario. A question as dumb and mindless and like stupid.

Seriously, it's disgraceful. I think it was a woman who asked a question. You should be asked to leave. You're not a reporter. You're not a serious journalist. Well, I feel like he's been so patient and kind and people ask these really dumb questions. I would be embarrassed to have some of these questions, but he answers them. He answers them because he's a nice person and he's not going to be one of those guys that's like, don't ask me about my... It makes him look very beta to be like, I'm here to talk about myself. We don't care.

right and he's not ever once done that and even the way he answered this question was like so so sweet in a non-answer way but the fact that he's never done that gives like these journalists like license to like ask these stupid questions and they're getting like worse and worse and further away from like you could say like what taylor songs do you like to wrap up for the game like bring it back to the fucking sport here yeah they're they're so out of line and you're right like he's gotten a reputation because he's so magnanimous like you can never catch me being that patient with such idiots like and it's like you give someone an inch they take a mile until the questions are getting worse they're getting more frequent i'm surprised he gets asked anything about football like it's really it's not fair and it's wrong Yeah, so he didn't answer the question, and then I wonder if he, like, felt... Like he was being rude. Right, so then he gave them a little something, which was sweet, but he really doesn't need to do that. No, he doesn't. And seriously, like, I need him to start being rude. And I just want to say, Taylor makes her own Pop-Tarts. Like, that's the sign. It's getting trad.

I don't even know Pop-Tarts. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's giving unfrosted. Do you think much unfrosted? No, I think she 1,000% read the book, The Marvelous Marjorie Post. We know she likes to read. And I think definitely during her Evermore era, she was reading a lot. And I could see her having, she loves a strong, powerful woman, a businesswoman. I think she definitely read Marjorie Post. You think so? That she reads swirly biographies like that? Yes, yes. She's very into like, that's how she knows random things and can write a song called Clara Bow, like some famous statue. She knows weird, random historical things for sure. What books do we know that she likes? We know that she likes...

Oh, that's a good question. Has she ever been spotted with a book? I feel like she likes Colleen Hoover. Oh, for sure. I mean, because who doesn't, really? For sure. By the way, literally goodreads.com. There's a blog post. Books, somebody made a list. Books Taylor Swift has mentioned. No particular order. Okay, Great Gatsby, of course. Jane Eyre. No, that's not what I'm talking about. Rebecca by Daphne DeMora. Is that Rebecca of Holiday House? Oh, for sure. A swirly biography on Rebecca? Gone Girl. I'm skipping some, like The Sun Also Rises. Yeah, of course, she read them in high school.

Were the Crawdads? Why? Just because she wrote a song for it? Or no, she definitely read the book. She 100% read the book if she's a reader and it was the biggest book of the year and subsequent years. And yeah, she wrote a song for the movie like she cares about it. All the Twilight books are in here? I believe that. And the rest are just classics like Charlotte's Web. So if she read Crawdads, then she is like a modern reader. Right. Definitely read Seven Husbands. It wasn't on that list, but there was a book about Elizabeth Taylor and her marriages on there. Yeah. I think she reads the modern classics.

Verity, Seven Husbands, Daisy Jones. She reads a lot of poetry, according to this Reddit thread. Does she read Fla Burt? I don't know, but I think she thinks, really, Burt? I think she reads Madame Bovary, for sure. I would love to know what books Taylor reads. Maybe a journalist could ask Travis that. That's a good question. Yeah, you could tell so much about someone from what they read, don't you find, Turteloo? For sure. Like, she definitely read Demon Copperhead.

You think? Yeah, because it's like, was one of the number one books. I wonder if she follows like a Reese's book club. Is she like a huge reader? Even like you have to be when you're that smart and like good with words. You read books, that's how you learn words. I wonder if she, like she would like the Redheads is all I'm going to say. She travels a lot too. She would like Lady Tan Circle of Women that we just read. If you could recommend one book to Taylor Swift. That's a good question. Girl with no job. Okay, that's so sweet. Our, excluding our books, our published works. Okay, wait, can I do a little research quickly? Me too, me too. Okay, and maybe I'll recommend a Redheads book just so that I could like then have her listen to the pod. That's smart.

We've had so many good books recently. Like, she would love, like, Strange Sally Diamond, even. You know? Strange Sally Diamond was very good, but that's, if you had one book. No, no, no. If I had one book, it's so hard to do this for anyone, La. It is, it is. Oh, Lessons in Chemistry. Like, I know she would like that. I know she would like that. I think I would recommend, you know what I actually know she would love? Love and Other Words by Christina Lauren. Like, seriously, one of the best books I've ever read. It's, like, so sweet and nostalgic and lovey, and she would love it. And what about It Happened One Summer?

Remind me which one that is. That's the one. Oh, that's the one. Yeah, Taylor Swift definitely would like some of it. For sure. I think she does. Yeah. But Marjorie Post, I could see her liking. Yeah.

That's a fun game. Sound off in the comments. What book would you recommend to Taylor Swift? That is a fun game. And back to this reporter. Like, seriously, it's shameful. We need to bring back shame. I heard somebody say that once. And I thought it the other day when I saw a grown woman pull her pants down in the street, lean up against a car and, like, squat and just start peeing. Right outside Bloomingdale's. Like, not even in the side. Like, on a major, major street. And I really thought to myself, like, we need to bring back shame. People need to act embarrassed. People need to know what humiliation feels like. Because we've sort of just foregone that feeling. And people feel the freedom to act however they want, to say whatever they want. And we need to start restricting people again. Like, I don't believe in freedom anymore.

Wow. I believe in shame. Wow. Can't you have both? No, clearly not. Look around, Jackie. Freedom to be ashamed? No, we need to bring back shame. And I apologize. I forget who said that. And I thought it was such a poignant way of saying it because you used to be fearful of what other people thought of you. And so you acted in a way that was, you know, in accordance with social conduct. And we no longer have that. We are boundless in our shamelessness and I'm not here for it. Yeah. Okay. Like the things I see, just like walking Romeo, you know, it's, we need to bring back shame. Also on the internet, you know, just the way people, like even, not even people being like crazy, like just like.

No shame. And not to, like, keep bringing it back to the girl who flashed her titties at the Dublin portal, but, like, if she had felt, if she had the capability to feel shame, she wouldn't have shut down the portal. Shut down the portal. And the guy who, you know, spread his cheeks on the portal. Like, ugh, stop, stop. I know the portal's like your romantic. To me, the portal is emblematic. You know how there's that shopping cart theory? Yes, well, do you know? Like, yeah, bitch, I told you about it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, but I'm just, like, trying to say. For the sake of conversation. For the sake of conversation, but also, like, that's what's called shopping cart theory.

Yes. Okay. Which by the way, I have issues with shopping cart theory. I just want to say. For those who don't know, the shopping cart theory is like, when you're shopping for groceries, you have everything in the cart, you go back to your car, you unload the groceries into the trunk. What do you do with that grocery cart when nobody's looking? That is like the true telltale sign of the type of person you are. Right. And I think people are like, I put it away when no one's looking. I'm a good person. I'm an empath. And they're like the nastiest motherfucker. And I don't think that that is how to tell a good person from a bad one. First of all, I, and just to say like, I always put the cart either back on the rack or on the sidewalk where it's not like.

disturbing someone else. So like I am, I pass the shopping cart test, but there are some times when people can't put their cart back. Like there are people. Well, that's what, there was this conversation being had on TikTok about it because this woman was like, when I'm shopping with my two kids, like, I'm sorry, I'm literally just leaving the cart. No, literally leave your cart. Like someone else can park a little further down who's like able-bodied and not with kids and they're going to be okay. Other people are disabled. There's things going on in people's lives and just putting the cart back or not putting the cart back doesn't make you a good person or a bad one. If you really think that it's that simple, like, then you don't know what it means to actually be a good person.

Jackie, I think that when people say the shopping cart thing, it's one, yeah, because you could be blocking someone else's parking spot if you just leave it. But it's also, I think, we're referencing the person whose job it is to accrue the shopping carts and put them back, the person who works for the store. Yeah. People are acting like it's this cardinal sin that that person now has to take three steps to go get another cart when like their job is getting carts. Like why is that the worst thing you could do to another person is the cart over there versus the cart over here when there's so many like other just behaviors. What did you do in the store? Were you an animal in the store but you put your cart away? You know, I don't think it's a perfect theory. Yeah, I just think people like really pat themselves on the back. Like I put my cart away, I'm good. Like no. No, then they go and get in their cart and they start like hitting their kids.

Like, and then they get in their car and they get on the phone and they leave, like, a nasty comment on someone's Instagram. Thoughtless little pig. You're a bad person. Yeah, no, totally. It's not a one-size-fits-all theory. Right. That's what I was gonna say. Like, that theory also could be applied to the portal. Like, what do you do when you get in front of the portal that says who you are? I completely agree. I completely agree. What would you do in front of the portal? It's just you and the portal and a bunch of people in Ireland. Can they hear me or just see me? Just see.

Damn, okay, because I would have started singing. I probably would have, like, danced a little bit. So cute, you're an entertainer. Like, a little booty, like, ah. You're an entertainer at heart. That's what it says about you. A thousand percent. I would have done, like, a ticket to the Renegade or something. So cute you are. What would she do? Like, peace wave? Yeah, no, she would have been, like, ah, you know? What's up? Yeah. Hey, how y'all doing? Just, like, cutie. Yeah. So that's what that says about me. It is what it says about me. If you spread your cheeks, there you go.

Are you ready for our next story? Oh my God, is it not even number five yet? It's number four. Oh my God, we are being leisurely today. We really are. Can the Kurds handle it? I think they can. Well, the fifth story will be a short one. But anyways, Bravo feud going on. Real Housewives of New York alum, Carol Radswell, is clapping back at nasty Andy Cohen after he outs her as an anonymous source. Oh my God, wait, what? This story is layered.

Carol slammed Andy on X on Tuesday after he claimed that she was the anonymous Rony star who shaded him in his recent New York Magazine profile. So in the profile about him, there were some anonymous quotes and he said on Radio Andy, oh, that was 100% Carol who said that. Oh my God. So then she wrote on X saying, someone can make a truthful observation and there's always one short-ish dude waiting to be offended. She said, at this point, why would any normal person use their name? They're all so vindictive, which I believe is the point of the quote and confirmed by Andy's nasty response. In other follow-up tweets, she called him condescending and absurd and said he should apologize for calling her out. So the quote in the story.

was this. The unnamed former Bravo star dissed Real Housewives of New York saying, quote, the show went from silly humor about middle-aged women getting drunk and being delusional about their status and having funny, petty arguments to housewives investigating and doing opposition research and making up false storylines and leaking stories on each other. Then the person went on to critique Andy's baby shower, specifically the part where Lisa Rinna encouraged people to get up and dance for Andy and his baby, which we all remember that moment. Iconic. And this person said, quote, I just thought it was such a cringe moment because that's the dynamic. Everyone just dances for Andy Cohen.

Now, I'm going to put Carol Radswell into a box. Now, this box is filled with only one other person, and it's Billie Eilish. And it's just every time we're talking about Carol Radswell or, you know, we're reading something that she said, it's so negative, she's so dreadful, and she is officially in my Fabissinopunum box. Like, just kind of this, like, long-faced, Dre cup misery. Like, and how you could look at that baby shower, which was seriously such a culmination of, like, love and joy. And everyone who was there said they had the best time. Like, there has not been one bad thing. If you can find something nasty to say about it, like, you are a Fabissinopunum. So...

I love, love that Andy called her out. Like he obviously figured out who it was. Yeah, he said it wasn't hard to figure out. We've not fired that many Real Housewives of New York. He said it's Carol Radswell, no question. It's the one mean quote in there and it's the only anonymous quote. There are 18 reasons why it's Carol. 18.

I think that was just like, oh, I thought it was like a, she did this too. Or like, oh no, I thought like Cal Radswell like is number 18 or something. I don't know, whatever. Yeah. Yeah. Also, it's kind of weird that, and he also said, he thought it was so weird that Carol would have kept herself anonymous, especially after all the times she shaded him publicly. He said, Carol said a lot of unkind things about me that she's tweeted and been quoted about. So I was like, why are you going off the record here? It was so weird to me. I didn't understand. And also we haven't really fired that many New York housewives. It's very obvious.

Got it, right. Yeah, because even Kristen Tateman came back. Everybody does. Right, and the quote, it's not even like it was so hot that she had to go anonymous for it, especially because she's been out there saying things. Well, I don't know, saying the thing about the baby shower is a particularly mean thing. Yeah, I agree, but the first part about why she thinks Roni failed, I disagree. That's not a criticism of Andy, though. No, and I disagree with why that's why the show was no longer good, doing opposition research and making up false storylines and leaking stories. No, that was good. And I think the thing she said at the beginning, all these older women drinking a lot, that was when the show was bad. Right, and being delusional about their status and having bloody arguments. That was painful.

That was painful where they would have these insane arguments the next morning and not remember anything and it was like all for nothing. Why did we even watch that? Right, right. What she described as like the good years were horrible. No, and this is like classic Carol, like always making the worst takes. It's really interesting her relationship with Andy, like how it deteriorated because she was one of those housewives that didn't need the show, that really had to be convinced to be on the show and she knew Andy before. So I don't know like what went down and Bethany obviously like played a huge part in it, but.

She's just like a hater. Yeah. I think it started when she felt like Andy took Bethany's side in their feud because they were both like tight with Andy. Yeah. But I will say like the Carol and Bethany years on Bravo, like those were great years. Yeah. Like those years of housewives before it all fell apart in Columbia. Like that was a great, great time. It was. She was a very good housewife, Carol. She brought a lot to the show. Like, but the way, like it's like how she left was so like unnecessarily messy and she kind of like doesn't let it go. How did she leave?

Remember, she snapped at Andy at the reunion because she felt like Andy was taking Bethany's side in that argument, and she did get fired. And then she just constantly is tweeting about it. I don't know what other platform she uses. Every time she's making news, it's on Twitter. And she's just always saying stuff. Got it. Yeah, well, that's the latest beef.

Damn, I didn't know that. I love that Andy called her out. Our fifth and final story is a quickie because Kevin Jonas undergoes a surgery to remove his skin cancer. And he said, it's a reminder to get your moles checked. It is. I gotta do that. Yeah, I feel like we have at least one story, two stories a year about this. And it's like a reminder for us, a reminder for us to remind people because he just underwent surgery to remove his skin cancer. He said, so today I'm getting a basal cell carcinoma removed from my head. He moved the camera to show the mole at the top of his forehead and continued, yes, that is an actual little skin cancer guy that has started to grow. And now I have to get surgery to remove it. So here we go.

Damn. Well, we've watched Lima and thanks for the reminder. I got to get that full body check. It's so uncomfortable. Like seriously, it's so awkward, but it's beyond necessary. Every time I do it, I feel like such a sigh of relief. Yeah. Yeah. So just a good reminder.

Thanks, Kevin Jonas. The show is not over because it's Hump Day. And Hump Day is a fabulous day here because we have Dear Toasters, our weekly advice segment. And Dear Toasters today is brought to you by Splash Refresher. I'm actually drinking one right here. I drink one pretty much every day on the toast. And something that you might have noticed about me, Jackie, in the last maybe month, I, seriously, after we finish the podcast, I run to the bathroom. I am so hydrated. I probably have at least four of these a day. So I'm drinking the Splash Refresher. For those who don't know what Splash Refreshers are, it's flavored water. Juliana, I drink a lot of flavored water.

I do. Everyone knows like sort of a fun fact about me is I'm genuinely incapable of drinking water. It's insane to me how quickly I down these splash refreshers. Do you know how long it would take me to drink like a regular bottle of water of this size? Yeah. The whole day. No, when you were at my house, I have so many splash refreshers. And my husband loves them. And you guys were like fighting over your flavor. You were literally like allocating them like mafia style. Like you can have the mandarin orange. I shall keep the wild berry. We can split the grape if you're nice to me. And also Zach and I were like extremely suspicious because they have zero calories. Like there's just no way.

We're like, what's wrong with them? They're so good. They literally are too good to be true. I like the wild berry flavor the best, but shout out to Mandarin. Yes, extremely good. But you were gracious enough to let him drink those in his own home. I was, I was. Well, I feel like he forgot that they were in the garage and then when I found them, I put them in the fridge and he was like, where'd you find these? I was like, oh, what did you like to know? Well, he was shocked that there were drinks in the fridge because that's his department and they never wind up there. I have to talk to my beverage coordinator.

We have so many at the studio. They're literally so good. And I can't stress enough the fact that they're actually keeping me alive. Yeah. No, she's finally drinking water. She's radiating, glowing from the inside out, hydrated. And it's crazy because I think this is like how much water what I'm drinking now like normal people drink. Like I'm peeing so much. I have to pee so bad right now at the beginning of every episode and at the end of every episode. Like I have to pee. That's great. It is great. I feel like I'm flushing out my system and I'm doing it in a delicious and refreshing way. Yeah. Everyone needs hacks to get through life, whatever it is. And if you're someone who struggles to drink water or you want to drink more water, tastier water, water, it can be hard to drink sometimes. It really can be like splash refreshers are what we're drinking.

And then like the internal struggle of being like, oh my God, I need to drink more water. Because obviously being hydrated is so good for like your skin, everything. And like you feel, like does anybody else feel this like sickening, disgusting pressure? And when it's like the end of the day and I realize I haven't drank a lot of water, like I have a pit. I'm like not taking care of my body. I haven't felt that way. Like the.

at which I just sort of like feel these days because I'm so, I can't believe, and by the way, this is a brand I had not heard of prior. That's why I love doing this show. They were like, do you want to try these beverages? I was like, yeah, sure. This big thing came to the toast. They're gone. I discovered, and they sell them everywhere. I can't believe I hadn't seen them before. Every time I do a grocery order, they have them everywhere. They're so good. Also, on our weight loss journeys, like drinking water is so great for helping with weight loss. And if you're like even doing all the right things, but you're not drinking enough water, like you're going to get stalled. And so this is like another major key. Hack. Hack tool in our toolkit because it takes a lot.

Yeah. Let me tell you the flavors. Wildberry, which is my personal favorite, but it's very personal. I told Zach Wildberry was my favorite. He was kind of shocked. Yeah. He's more of a Mandarin man himself. So Wildberry, acai grape, which I am not into grape flavoring. Who is? Ben's offer. Like Ben loves grape. He loves the acai grape. Pineapple, mango, lemon, and mandarin orange. They are delicious, bright, flavorful, and hydrating. And most importantly, zero calories. Like I actually can't believe it. I like a lemon. I love a lemon water.

They are available to shop at tons of grocery stores, Sam's Club, Walmart, Kroger, your other favorite retailers. Look for them. You might not have noticed them, but now you will. And this is one of the things people keep tagging me in because I keep drinking them. There's always an empty one on my nightstand. And I'm just kind of starting a movement. Okay. Thank you, Turdy. Yes. So good. So good. So again, the brand is called Splash Refreshers. This is the Wildberry flavor. You can get them at Kroger, Sam's Club, Walmart, your other favorite retailers. They come in a bunch of different flavors like Wildberry, Acai, Grape, Pineapple, Mango, Lemon, Mandarin Orange. They have zero calories. And if you're just like a girly who's always a little dehydrated.

It is what it is. Pardon me all. It's just like we're always like a little malnourished in that sense. You can turn your life around. I am the face of what it looks like. I am on the other side. I have solved the problem. And I did all the things. You know, everybody was like, if you get a big water bottle and leave it by. So I did. And it helped for like a couple of days. But ask me when the last time I touched on a water bottle. Yeah, of course. It's a job. No, and sometimes I'll make it nice. Like I'll put this in a cup or whatever. But it's also just good straight out of the bottle. Okay. Yeah. I love Splash Refresher. And I'm so excited because they are the sponsor of today's.

Dear Toasters. Let me pull that up. Are you ready? I am ready. For those who don't know, Dear Toasters is our weekly advice segment where you can write in for a chance to get advice from two extremely well-adjusted human beings. You can write to us, deartasters at gmail.com or head to our website, thetoastpodcast.com. You'll be able to get the chance.

Hey, Jackson Turney, I need help from a La Tostada, and this one is spicy. I'm 35 years old, and I'm in a relationship with my PJOM boyfriend going on 13 years. I went on his Apple Music playlist recently to change a song the other day, and I saw that he had been listening to and subscribed to a few podcasts about swinging. It's always the PJOM boyfriend, right? Yeah, of course. My PJOM boyfriend stabbed me in my sleep last night. Should I be mad? I think you should. We've never discussed this before. Should I be worried that he's going to want to do that? Please help.

Like, yeah, you don't listen to podcasts. Like, people listen to Huberman because they're interested in science. People listen to the shows because they're interested in celebrities. Pop culture, yeah. People listen to podcasts about swinging because they're interested in swinging. Now, I'm going to look at podcasts about swinging just to see if there's another angle here. I didn't know that they had, like, this is the thing. That's what's amazing about podcasting. There's something for everyone. Mr. and Mrs. W are swinging adventures. Oh, gotta listen. New Swingers podcast.

We are new swingers merely documenting and discussing our swinger journey and talking about the experiences we're having and the lessons we're learning. I just want to say, like, there is a tiny percent chance, like, this does sound just interesting. Entertaining. Yeah. But, like, no. You know? No. There's midlife craving.

I followed. I didn't follow. This woman came up on my TikTok. She was like, spend the day with me on a swingers cruise. And it was like this cruise of swingers like taking over this enormous cruise ship. And she was like showing the food and stuff. And just because you watch it doesn't mean you want to swing. But that does sound like interesting content. There's also Swing Nation. It actually was interesting. I didn't know that there were podcasts for swingers. But I also didn't know there was a cruise for swingers. So you truly learn something new every day. Diary of a swinging couple. Can we help this girl, by the way, instead of promoting shows that aren't ours? Don't talk to him.

No, I think you can talk to him. By the way, there's space for you to listen to Diary of a Swinging Couple and The Toast. Like, I don't feel competitive with them. Okay, for sure. But there's not space for your partner to be listening to a podcast about swinging. Like, I'm going to draw a hard line here. Yeah, unless it's like, you know, the new serial and everyone's talking about it. But have we heard anything? No. Yeah. And then I guess you don't want to bring it up to him because you don't want to like, you don't want to bring swinging into it. I guess swinging, the good thing about swinging is like, he can't do it without you. You know, because then that's just like, then he would be cheating and he would listen to a cheating podcast. Like, you do it together. So he can't go and swing without you. So he will have to talk to you about it eventually.

Yeah, do you wait for him to come to you? Yeah, because if you broke the subject, then all of a sudden you're like considering swinging before you even had to. Consider it. Yeah, but if you give him more time, like he's really gonna convince himself that this is something that he wants. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. And there's absolutely no shade to anybody who chooses to live their life in the way of swinging. It's, you know. Clearly there's a lot of swingers. But, you know, you shouldn't feel like you have to start swinging because your husband like heard it on a podcast, you know. Right, and it takes two to swing. That's kind of like the whole problem. Yeah, so it's. Therein lies the issue. You have to want to also. And I'm gonna assume that you don't. You just have to like sit and pray. Pray it away.

Yeah. Pray the gay away. Pray the swing away. Pray the sway away. Sorry if that's not helpful. It's not, but don't do anything you're not comfortable with. And seriously, what's a good reaction to something like this? I think you need to be really dramatic at the absurdity of it all so he feels stupid. Yeah, but then are you yucking his yums? Sorry, we entered into this deal with monogamy first, so it's not a yum. It's unacceptable. Yeah.

Like, seriously, if Ben came to me and was like, I want to start swinging, I'd be like, okay, so go outside. Yeah. Like, go on swings. Like, it's so foreign. But I guess, like, in certain, you know, subdivisions of this country, it's actually extremely common. Yeah, they've been together 13 years, which does feel pretty mature for what I think I know about swinging. You know, that party on the OC where they all put their watches in a bowl. Like, they were all older. And then Sandy took his watch out. And that's what I know about swinging. What I know about swinging is from, what was I watching? Oh, that terrible show, Sex Life. They, like, go to a swingers party. With, like, this, in this, like, kind of wealthy neighborhood. It kind of looked fun. But I think people, like, swing.

I think they do too. And there's like a lot of hidden signals. Swing, swing. Like if you're at your local grocery store and you buy a pineapple. Yeah. Do you know this? I think I've seen this. What do you do? And you put your pineapple upside down in the grocery cart that like lets other people know it's like a virtue signal. Like I swing, contact me. Okay, but then if you don't put your cart away, they're watching you and they don't want to be friends with you. Literally. They're watching you. Okay, wait. This next one is like kind of crazy. Hey, Jackson Turd. Love you both so much. I'm an OG toaster. I've got a short and sweet one here. A bit of a first world problem, but it's really bothering me. I travel for work a lot with my CEO. About one trip per month, just the two of us. Sounds like a spinning of a smut novel.

Not at all, right? She keeps upgrading her flights to first class. Oh, she. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. You thought it was a man. Oh, my God, look at Jackie's confirmation bias. Yeah. Okay, so she didn't say CEO. Right, and it's confusing when you didn't say my girl boss and CEO. Yeah, she didn't use the CEO pronouns. So my boss keeps upgrading her flights to first class, not using points, using the company card, but not upgrading mine. I made a joke of it the last trip and asked to be upgraded to, and she just laughed. Like, is this rude or am I being entitled? I'm a VP, and it's a small company.

I think you're not right. Yeah. Like, I guess a VP, like, I think you get perks, but every company has, like, their framework for, like, how much you can spend on flights, who gets upgraded. Like, they literally have in the companies, like, only CEOs and VPs get upgraded or can fly first class and directors fly this level. So it's a small company, so maybe they don't have that, but, like, she's the CEO and she's saying, like, ha-ha, it's ha-ha. Yeah, like, you tried. She shot your shot. You didn't get fired. Love the confidence, because, like, it's kind of, like, a really crazy thing to do and say. You tried. You were brutally rebuffed. And, like, you really can't be mad that she's up. Like, she's obviously,

Well, if she's doing it with the company card, she's well within her legal rights to do so. She's a CEO. She makes the rules. Yeah, yeah. And, you know, it would be nice if her, you know, two girl bosses out on a trip traveling solo. Yeah, it would be nice if her to upgrade you. But she has no sort of obligation to do that. And you being mad is, yes, to use your words, not mine, it's extremely entitled. And I just want to say, like, I feel like she's telling her friends, like, this girl that works at my company just asked why she's not sitting with me in first class. Like, and she's, like, just be glad, like, if nothing changes between the two of you. Yeah, like, and let me just say, like, that sucks, you know, like, to travel with someone and they be in first class and you not.

It sucks, but like you're fine. No, it's not like your friend or your partner. Like it's work. Right. It doesn't suck. There's a hierarchy. You're traveling. No, but like from a human perspective. Like, yeah, that sucks. Okay. But it's not wrong. No. Our third and final. Are you ready? Something I personally have zero experience with. I just, I can't really. Do I have experience? Maybe. Okay. Good morning, Jackson Turdy. I'm a Gen Z Swirly and I need your help. I joined in a Camden and I don't know how to get. No, I'm kidding. But I think I'm Gen Z. I just think I'm in Camden. Okay, Gen Z Swirly here. I need your help. I don't know how to get out.

Okay. Okay. Okay, I'm really fine. I don't know how to get that. But also, like, why are there still encampments? Isn't it summer? Yeah, no, like, tell me you're a loser without telling me you're a loser. Didn't we already have to, like, suffer through their graduation protests? Like, why are you still on campus? Go home. Okay.

I actually really do want to get to this my fiance my fiance thinks that he can sing and I've really never told him that he can't there was never a reason to tell him and he was never straight up like asking me if he thought if I thought he was a good singer but now he wants to sing at our wedding Oh, my God. And I don't know what to tell him. Please help me. Do I tell him that he can't sing? Do I just let him sing? He really wants to and he thinks it would be really special. I just have to say, like, if I didn't sing at my own wedding, there's literally no excuse for anybody else to. Like, I think even if you marry Celine Dion, like, you shouldn't be singing at your own wedding. Like, dead ass. And so the fact that your husband, like, can't even sing is just cherry on top. I don't think people should be, like, singing themselves down the aisle. Like, I don't like that. I also think that, like, how you handle this moment will set the tone for your relationship. Like, if you want to be, like, Simon Cowell, in a good way. Like, you could be, like, I love you. I'm so excited to marry you. You're not singing at our wedding. Like, I think it makes me really

be strong in other areas down the line and other problematic things so I don't even think you need to like cushion this for him like I think it would be set good precedent of you laying down the law yeah no directness is never a bad thing but you do have to you're right cushion is a perfect word like say it nicely because no no I'm saying don't cushion it oh I'm saying just like lay down the law like this is absurd No, it is absurd. We're grown up. We're literally getting married. But how do you tell someone? He obviously thinks he has a good voice because he wants to sing at his own wedding in front of hundreds of people. So you could start with being like, I want you and I to... You could try and do a little lie where it's like, I want it to be about you and I. If you're singing, you're going to be worried about your performance. You're going to be backstage doing soundcheck when we're supposed to be having our moments together. And I don't want that to take away from our special day. So you could give a little lie. And then if he's like, no, I really want to. And he's being a baby about it, then you could be like, and you're not a good singer. You're not a good enough singer to sing at our wedding. Because I'm sure he's fine. I just want to say, I...

like you know think I have a great voice much like this guy I happen to know I'm like very in tune with reality so I know that I do have like I don't have like the best voice ever but I have a good singing voice like I can carry a tune but if somebody I loved like you if you literally sat me down you're like Claudia do you know like this whole time you've never had a good voice like you actually like are a bad singer I actually can't even visualize it because it's so not true but like I would be crush I don't think it's necessary to say that I think if you have to get really honest you could say like your voice isn't good enough to sing at our wedding like you're not Andrea Bocelli also Claudia you sang at my wedding and if you remember because I do like it hindered some of your experience you felt like you couldn't start drinking until after your performance you know and when they told me I sat down for dinner and they were like you're eating after dessert I'm like after dessert you wanted to start having fun like you were nervous you were in there for sound check while other people were having cocktail hour like logistically and so you can say this you can make this the excuse even if he did have an amazing voice like it would take away from his experience on the day there are a million things that you can say this man's not sitting at your wedding and you need to put your foot down No, it's sometimes like really many to be told. Like, and this might be one of those situations. Like, it's really absurd. Even if you have like a somewhat good voice, like singing at your own wedding, I'm sorry, it's like top 10 cringiest things you could do. Yeah, I really like making it about taking away from his experience on the day because it's so true. Even if you had an amazing voice. Yeah, it is true. I lived it. Learned from my experience. Yeah.

So you do have experience with it. All's to say. Oh, it's true. It's true. That is Dear Toasters, our weekly advice segment. Again, you can email us, deartosters at gmail.com or head to our website, thetoastpodcast.com. That is our episode, Jax. It's a pleasure. Thank you guys so much for listening to the Toast on the Monday morning show. We deal with the Fast Five stories you need to know everybody through Friday and YouTube. So if you're watching us on YouTube, please don't forget to subscribe and give us a video. Thumbs up. We are also available as podcasts anywhere podcasts can be found. So that's Spotify, iTunes, Stitcher, Public Radio, IHR Radio, CastBox, all the places where we listen to podcasts, find us at Toast. Leave a five-star review about how beautiful, about how stunning, and about how wickedly talented we are. Have an amazing day, and we'll see you tomorrow. Love ya. Bye.