Date Like A Nerd

💬 You're in a group. You know you want to say something. You just can't find the right time. The conversation moves on, the moment passes, and you spend the rest of the evening wondering why it's so hard to just speak up 😶🎮 In this episode, I talk to Catherine Richardson, a psychologist specializing in geek culture and mental health. She blends Acceptance and Commitment Therapy with gaming and pop culture to support neurodivergent professionals. And she just created something that might change how you think about social skills entirely.🕹️ It's called "Speak Without Freezing," a free visual novel designed to help you practice what to say before you actually have to say it. Not by giving you a script to memorize, but by letting you rehearse in an environment where there's no social cost. Think of it as a dating sim, except instead of trying to win someone over, you're working on yourself 💪⚠️ But here's the challenge: practicing something in a game and actually doing it in real life are two very different things. So how does muscle memory work when the stakes are real? And what do you do when the social rules change depending on who you're with, what culture you're in, or even what room you walk into? 🗺️ 🧊 If you ever freeze up during conversations, go quiet at the worst moment, or wait so long to say something that everyone has already moved on, this episode is for you. 🎧 Press Start and learn how to speak without freezing! 🥶👾 FREE GUIDE: WHERE NERDS REALLY MEET THEIR PLAYER 2 🕹️Based on real-world nerd data. Download it at https://datelikeanerd.com/reality📱 Have questions? Join me on Discord! https://www.datelikeanerd.com/discordCatherine's Links:www.geekmentalwellbeing.comhttps://www.instagram.com/geekmentalwellbeing/Related Episodes:Level Up Your Social Skills Using Online Gaming Communities, with Kaylee LopezGamify Your Dating Anxiety, with Michael BergerIRL Lessons from Video Games, with Dr. Daniel KaufmannHow to Approach Your Gym Crush (Without Being A Creep), with Jordan YaklinShy meets Socially Anxious, and Going Slow: the Nerd Love Story of Steven and ChristinIntroverted Nerds on Dating Apps, the Nerd Love Story of Phillip and DarcyTimestamps for lazy nerds:00:00:00 Intro00:01:00 Speak Without Freezing00:03:19 How it Helps with Social Anxiety00:07:37 Social Anxiety and Perfection00:12:22 Skills to Learn00:14:55 Dating Sims00:19:37 How to Apply the Skills IRL00:22:14 Playing the Game While in Therapy00:23:57 Not Waiting for Perfection00:25:46 Adapting to Different People00:31:48 Social Anxiety and Cold Approaches00:36:55 Catherine's LinksContact:[email protected] or@datelikeanerd on social media

🐉 What happens when a weeb shows up to meet a potential client in sweatpants, messy hair, and zero game? Apparently... marriage and kids!🎌 Brian had been "putting himself out there" for years. He thought he was doing everything right. He was in shape, playing rugby, feeling charismatic and confident. But something kept getting in the way, and it wasn't his hobbies, his looks, or his love of anime.It finally took a coworker's offhand connection, a client he had absolutely no intention of dating, and a friend pulling him aside and pointing out what he had been missing all along.⚠️ The most interesting part of Brian's story isn't how he met his wife. It's what he had been doing before her, why it wasn't working, and what did!👾 If you've ever felt like you should know how to date but can't get past the tutorial, this episode is for you 🕹️🎧 Press Play and learn from Brian's evolution! 💪👾 FREE GUIDE: WHERE NERDS REALLY MEET THEIR PLAYER 2 🕹️Based on real-world nerd data. Download it at https://datelikeanerd.com/reality📱 Have questions? Join me on Discord! https://www.datelikeanerd.com/discordBrian's Links:https://www.instagram.com/anime_help_hotline/https://www.patreon.com/Anime_Help_Hotlinehttps://www.youtube.com/@ahhbriantimehttps://anime-help-hotline.printify.me/https://www.tiktok.com/@brianbiglock5Related Episodes:The Hidden Cost of Finding Love With Red Pill Dating: John’s Nerd Love StoryCold Approaches Failed. One Night With New Friends Worked, Mrinal’s Nerd Dating Transformation"You're Nice But I'm Not Interested" After Every First Date, Aaron's Nerd Dating TransformationHow to Leave the Friend Zone: The Master Plan, the Nerd Love Story of Nicole & DavidWhy You’re Still Single Even If You’re Going to Meetups, with Single Player GeorgeAnimé Los Angeles: Where to Meet Nerds, with MattTolkien meets Star Wars: The Nerd Love Story of Kaia and CelaniaThe TTRPG Group, the Nerd Love Story of Frank and MouseTimestamps for lazy nerds:00:00:00 Intro00:01:09 What Makes Brian a Nerd00:01:47 An English Teacher in Japan00:04:48 First Impressions00:09:05 From Professional to Romantic00:12:43 Asking to Hold Hands00:17:28 The Build-Up00:21:09 How Long to Start Dating00:23:41 The Dirty Otaku Roots00:27:03 Being Yourself00:30:34 Becoming a Healthy Otaku00:36:18 Brian's Contacts#datelikeanerd #datingtips #datingadvice #dating #nerdlife #nerd #gamer #single #socialskills #podcast #otakulife #animelover #nerdlife #datingcoachContact:[email protected] or@datelikeanerd on social media

🎲 Want to find love but hate loud bars and clubs? Tabletop role-playing games like Dungeons and Dragons (DnD) could be your perfect anti-social social quest. But here's the catch: you can't just show up, roll a charisma check, and expect to find your Player 2. You need to actually make friends with the people behind the characters! 🧙‍♂️🎮 In this episode, Sean (aka Mr. Shickadance), a Dungeon Master and content creator, breaks down exactly where to find TTRPG groups and how to use them to unlock your social tree 🗺️🎲 Because if you only ever meet for game nights, you'll never get to meet the players behind the characters. After all, what you do outside of the table is what turns your party members into real friends. And from there, you never know who you could meet. That's where the real magic happens. 📝🔓 No cold approaches. No loud bars or clubs. And no endless swiping only to get ghosted 👻🎧 Ready to roll for initiative on your social life? Press Start now and start building your IRL party! 🗡️👾 FREE GUIDE: WHERE NERDS REALLY MEET THEIR PLAYER 2 🕹️Based on real-world nerd data. Download it at https://datelikeanerd.com/realitySean's Links:https://linktr.ee/mrshickadancehttps://www.instagram.com/mr_shickadance_/https://tiktok.com/@mrshickadancehttps://www.youtube.com/@mr_shickadance_https://x.com/MrShickadance_https://www.threads.com/@mr_shickadance_https://www.twitch.tv/mr_shickadance_Related Episodes:The TTRPG Group, the Nerd Love Story of Frank and MouseHow to Leave the Friend Zone: The Master Plan, the Nerd Love Story of Nicole & DavidThe Tolkien Association: Where to Meet Nerds, with VirFind Your Nerd Community: Where to Meet Nerds, with JoseDating In The Tolkien Association, with JoseHobbit Hike: Where to Meet Nerds, with Sompi HarmetzAnimé Los Angeles: Where to Meet Nerds, with MattFind Love Through Online Games, with Kaylee LopezHow to Make Nerd Friends, with Pete “Belmont”Timestamps for lazy nerds:00:00:00 Intro00:01:01 What are TTRPGs00:03:35 Joining A New Group00:07:45 Choosing Your Friends00:13:01 Taking Your Friends Out Of The Container00:15:57 TTRPGs Are Social Games00:20:19 Dating Between Players00:23:19 Be Open to Trying New Things00:27:08 Your First Character00:28:22 Where to Find A D&D Group00:35:41 Where to Find Sean#datelikeanerd #datingtips #datingadvice #dating #nerdlife #nerd #gamer #single #socialskills #dnd #ttrpg #ttrpgs #datingcoachContact:[email protected] or@datelikeanerd on social media

💔 Is it possible to escape the Friend Zone? Or are you worried that if you stay friends too long, you'll miss your shot? 🎯 Most dating advice screams: "Make a move within 3 dates, or you're done!" But what if you're shy? What if they're not ready? What if rushing things actually ruins your best chance at love? 😰🗺️ Nicole's "master plan" wasn't about pickup lines or manufactured scarcity. It was about creating genuine opportunities to spend time with someone she liked. Through D&D sessions and texts about Nicholas Cage, she built a friendship so solid that when romance finally happened, it led straight to marriage 💍⚠️ But here's the tricky part: How do you know if you're "being patient" or just wasting your time? How do you create romantic possibilities without being manipulative? And if most couples start as friends... why does everyone tell you to avoid it? 🤨⏳ If you've ever been stuck wondering whether to confess your feelings or wait it out, worried about "ruining the friendship," or felt like you're doing everything wrong because you're not moving fast enough... this episode will completely reframe how you think about dating 🧠🎧 Press play to learn this strategy to go from friends to lovers! 🚀👾 FREE GUIDE: WHERE NERDS REALLY MEET THEIR PLAYER 2 🕹️Based on real-world nerd data. Download it at https://datelikeanerd.com/reality📱 Have questions? Join me on Discord! https://www.datelikeanerd.com/discordNicole's Links:https://linktr.ee/tabletopBLThttps://www.instagram.com/tabletopblt/https://www.threads.com/tabletopblthttps://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61564306597098&mibextid=ZbWKwLhttps//discord.com/invite/tabletopblthttps://tabletopblt.substack.com/?r=6j0islRelated Episodes:Rejected, Friendzoned, and Not Reading the Signals: the Nerd Love Story of Vir and DiegoText Confession Gone Wrong, No Proper Dates, and Critical Fail: the Nerd Love Story of Lud and MatiShy meets Socially Anxious, and Going Slow: the Nerd Love Story of Steven and ChristinPhysical Escalation from Friends to Lovers: the Nerd Love Story of Jose and JulianThe TTRPG Group, the Nerd Love Story of Frank and MouseTimestamps for lazy nerds:00:00:00 Intro00:00:51 What Makes Her A Nerd00:03:17 The Wedding Blind Date00:09:01 First Impressions00:10:43 Not Ready For A Relationship00:15:18 The D&D Approach00:19:57 Leaving the D&D Container00:22:38 Embracing The Friend Zone00:32:25 Doubting The Friend Zone00:38:12 The Master Plan to Leave The Friend Zone00:45:22 Starting From Friendship00:47:44 The End of The Friend Zone00:53:16 Final Thoughts00:54:38 TTRPGs for Social Skills#datingtips #datingadvice #dating #nerdlifeContact:[email protected] or@datelikeanerd on social media

🎯 Going to meetups every week, showing up to events over and over again, hitting nerd conventions annually, and still single? You're not alone. George is a 47-year-old Marvel and Star Wars fan who attends events regularly, has female friends, and can dance without drinking. So why hasn't he found his Player 2? 🤔🔒 The problem isn't the meetups. It's staying stuck in the container. George would meet women he liked, exchange Instagrams, but never unlock his social tree. He'd only connect 1-on-1 with women he was attracted to, then disappear if they wanted to be "just friends." Why? He believed women decide whether you're dateable within 30 seconds, so friendship = game over 👾📊 According to my surveys, 70% of nerd couples who didn't meet on dating apps started as friends (usually for 6 months to a year!). Even 20% of the couples who met on dating apps started as friends first! That "women decide in 30 seconds" rule? Debunked. The friend zone fear? Actually blocking him from the exact path most nerds take to find their Player 2 🎲🧩 So what's the missing piece? How do you turn meetup connections into actual dating opportunities? 🍷🎧 Press Start to find out how to unlock 2-player mode! 🎮 🎮👾 FREE GUIDE: WHERE NERDS REALLY MEET THEIR PLAYER 2 🕹️Based on real-world nerd data. Download it at https://datelikeanerd.com/reality📱 Have questions? Join me on Discord! https://www.datelikeanerd.com/discordRelated Episodes:'I'm Cooked' (Where to Find Dates After College), with Single Player Brandon"You're Nice But I'm Not Interested" After Every First Date, Aaron's Nerd Dating TransformationCold Approaches Failed. One Night With New Friends Worked, Mrinal’s Nerd Dating TransformationRejected, Friendzoned, and Not Reading the Signals: the Nerd Love Story of Vir and DiegoPhysical Escalation from Friends to Lovers: the Nerd Love Story of Jose and JulianThe Tolkien Association: Where to Meet Nerds, with VirFind Your Nerd Community: Where to Meet Nerds, with JoseFind Love Through Online Games, with Kaylee LopezThe Twitch Streamer on Discord, the Nerd Love Story of Luna and JasonTimestamps for lazy nerds:00:00:00 Intro00:00:38 What Makes George A Nerd00:01:10 Going to Meetups00:04:16 Starting Out As Friends00:07:42 The Friends Next Door00:10:39 How Many Relationships Start As Friendships00:12:55 The Benefits of Friendships00:17:33 Meeting People At Meetups00:20:33 Scheduling Problems00:23:41 Choosing The Right Friends00:29:14 Being Vulnerable00:37:17 The Awkward Friend00:46:18 Final Thoughts#datingtips #datingadvice #dating #nerdlife #nerd #gamer #single #socialskills #podcastContact:[email protected] or@datelikeanerd on social media

🤔 What if months of cold approaching strangers kept you single and frustrated, but making new friends got you numbers? That's exactly what happened to Mrinal, a past client of mine 🤓 He's a nerd who plays D&D, learned Japanese to watch anime without subtitles, and spent months following mainstream dating advice that made him feel uncomfortable and inauthentic 💀🌐 When we started working together, the first breakthrough was realizing that "real life is NOT a subreddit." While online spaces amplified his fears and made him think everyone would judge him, the real world was completely different. He joined an improv group's WhatsApp chat (terrified his first message would be ignored), went contra dancing, and discovered board game nights just minutes from his home. Places he'd convinced himself didn't exist or weren't for him 🎲But here's the real transformation: Mrinal went from isolated and desperate to getting invited to 4 Halloween parties within only a couple of months of us working together 🎃 He's no longer afraid to left-swipe on dating apps for fear of missing out on a match. He's not desperately trying to get "whatever he can get." And most importantly? He stopped waiting for the "perfect fit" and just started showing up. Because those "imperfect" activities led him to the right people 🎯💤 If you're tired of feeling like dating advice is keeping you single, or if you've been brave enough to try everything but nothing feels right, listen to Mrinal's story. Because sometimes the world is so much bigger than you think! 🌍🎧 Press Start and learn what's possible when you Date Like A Nerd! 🤓                  👾 WONDERING IF COACHING IS RIGHT FOR YOU?🕹️                                         Book a FREE Discovery Call!                            https://www.datelikeanerd.com/player2/📱 Have questions? Join me on Discord! https://www.datelikeanerd.com/discordRelated:How to Find Groups and Socialize as a Shy, Introverted Nerd (Step-By-Step Guide)I Surveyed 273 Nerds in Canada: Here's The Dating Strategy That Worked"You're Nice But I'm Not Interested" After Every First Date, Aaron's Nerd Dating TransformationThe Hidden Cost of Finding Love With Red Pill Dating: John’s Nerd Love Story'I'm Cooked' (Where to Find Dates After College), with Single Player BrandonTimestamps for lazy nerds:00:00:00 Intro00:35:12 What Makes Him a Nerd00:01:34 Life Before Coaching00:06:04 Ashamed of Being a Nerd00:08:34 Why Coaching00:12:17 What Coaching Was Like00:16:34 Starting to Socialize00:20:40 Real Life Isn't a Subreddit00:25:40 Dating Achievements00:30:46 Socializing as an Introvert00:37:28 Having Dating Standards00:43:08 Stop Waiting For Perfection#datelikeanerd #datingtips #datingadvice #dating #nerdlife #nerd #gamer #single #socialskills #podcastContact:[email protected] or@datelikeanerd on social media

🫣 Meeting new people can be scary. That's why online gaming communities are a great way to start if you have Level 1 Social Skills and want to farm some XP! 👾In this episode, I bring back Kaylee Lopez, an anthropologist who writes about gaming and game communities. We discussed why communities are important and how you can use them to level up your social skills IRL 💬🏰 From self-esteem to safety, communities can serve many different purposes. Fortunately, whether they're online or in-person doesn't dramatically change the impact they can have on you. Having a group of people who want to be with you and support you can help you become more secure in yourself and with others 😎🖥️ You can use online social spaces to try new social skills that you're too afraid to test in the real world. By giving your avatar the behaviours you'd like to have yourself, you can safely test what it would feel like to be someone different 🦸 Someone you want to be 🫅You'll even get to see how people react, and how you can react to those reactions (and so on) 🤩 After rinsing and repeating, you'll start incorporating those characteristics into your real life. There are forms of therapy (including TTRPGs) that are based on this model. The fact that it's not "the real you" is irrelevant. You'll still grow and develop into the person you want to become 🙌As time goes by and you start feeling more confident both in your skills and with the people in your community, you can go from text-based interactions to audio, video, and maybe even in-person meetings! 🤗🫡 So what are you waiting for? Are you going to accept this new Quest? 🙂‍↕️🎧 Listen now and start leveling up your social skills online! 🦾👾 FREE GUIDE: WHERE NERDS REALLY MEET THEIR PLAYER 2 🕹️Based on hundreds of surveys of nerd couples and singles. Download it at https://datelikeanerd.com/reality📱 Have questions? Join me on Discord! https://www.datelikeanerd.com/discordRelated Episodes:Find Love Through Online Games, with Kaylee LopezThe Tolkien Association: Where to Meet Nerds, with VirGamify Your Dating Anxiety, with Michael BergerFind Your Nerd Community: Where to Meet Nerds, with JoseThe Twitch Streamer on Discord, the Nerd Love Story of Luna and JasonBeat the Fear of Rejection Through Your Gamer’s Journey, with Dr. Daniel KaufmannIRL Lessons from Video Games, with Dr. Daniel KaufmannDating In The Tolkien Association, with JoseHow to Make Nerd Friends, with Pete “Belmont”Timestamps for lazy nerds:00:00:00 Intro00:01:19 The Value Of Communities00:03:46 Becoming Secure Through Communities00:06:09 IRL vs Online Communities00:08:09 How to Meet People in Online Games00:10:35 Developing Social Skills00:13:19 Who You Want To Be00:15:00 Staying Safe00:21:05 ContactContact:[email protected] or@datelikeanerd on social media

🧐 How can you find a partner at a convention? The Date Like A Nerd surveys showed that conventions are one of the top places to meet nerds, and that real relationships do come out of those connections. In fact, Bimini and Riv's story proves that a convention crush can turn into something real, even when you think they're already taken, even across long distance, and even after starting out as friends 🤝🎭 Bimini and Riv interacted briefly during a Hazbin Hotel cosplay sing-along. Riv had impressed Bimini with his cosplay and theatrical skills, so when she found out he would be attending the next day, Bimini bought a ticket just to see him again. But when she showed up... Riv mistook her male friend for a boyfriend! Both were disappointed after seeing the other's reaction 😱📱 After the event, they stayed in touch as long-distance friends, unclear as to the others' feelings 🤨 This is a story of how misunderstandings can create unnecessary challenges, and how good communication can be the Special Skill to beat that Boss! 💕 If you've ever had a convention crush, worried about misreading signals, or wondered if you can be friends without getting friend-zoned, this episode is for you! Because sometimes a crush at a convention stays just that: a fun memory. But other times, if you're brave enough to take action, it can turn into something real 💘🎧 Press Play and learn how nerd couples can form at conventions! 🦸‍♂️👾 FREE GUIDE: WHERE NERDS REALLY MEET THEIR PLAYER 2 🕹️Based on real-world nerd data. Download it at https://datelikeanerd.com/reality📱 Have questions? Join me on Discord! https://www.datelikeanerd.com/discordTimestamps for lazy nerds:00:00:00 Intro00:00:55 What Makes Them Nerds00:01:36 The First Approach00:05:14 "She Has a Boyfriend"00:08:53 Not Reading The Signs00:12:11 Clarifying Misunderstandings00:13:19 Maintaining the Long-Distance Connection00:14:45 Friendship and Attraction00:18:18 Planning the First Date00:21:09 The First Date00:27:59 The Second Date00:32:00 Keeping Online Connections Alive00:36:47 Couples from Conventions00:38:38 How to Meet CosplayersContact:[email protected] or@datelikeanerd on social media

❌ Are you stuck getting rejected after every first date? Dating apps can feel exhausting when you're anxiously trying to perform for someone who barely knows you. Aaron spent 18 months going through 50+ first dates, constantly hearing "you're great, but [polite rejection]." Sound familiar? 📱💻 As someone who treats problems like debugging code, Aaron spent over a year Googling dating advice like error messages. He tried following the scripts, behaving as he thought people wanted, and analyzing every interaction afterward. But that people-pleasing approach just left him more exhausted and hopeless 😩🤹🏽‍♂️ The anxiety was real. Every date felt like a performance where he had to get everything right. The more dates that didn't work out, the more he'd over-analyze why it was happening and fall deeper into rabbit holes of "doing the right thing." 🐰 The constant failure was wrecking his confidence, and 18 months in, he was ready to give up entirely.🎯 But then something shifted. Through our work together, Aaron learned to stop treating dating like a problem to solve and started showing up as himself (anxious parts included). He stopped following generic advice and started building genuine connections, both on apps and at in-person meetups. The difference? Night and day ☀️😎 This isn't a story about becoming "confident" overnight or following some magic formula. It's about what happens when you stop performing and start being real. In this episode, Aaron and I talk about how the coaching process helped him go from feeling hopeless to becoming more successful and even enjoying the process! 🏆💬 If you've been rejected after every first date and feel like something must be wrong with you, listen to Aaron's story. You're not broken. You just need a different strategy 👾🎧 Press Start and level up your dating without following any scripts! 📜                      👾 WONDERING IF COACHING IS RIGHT FOR YOU?🕹️                                       Book a FREE Discovery Call!                               https://www.datelikeanerd.com/player2/ 📱 Have questions? Join me on Discord! https://www.datelikeanerd.com/discordRelated Episodes:From No Dates to Feeling Truly Seen and Accepted: Kirk's StoryThe Hidden Cost of Finding Love With Red Pill Dating: John’s Nerd Love Story'I'm Cooked' (Where to Find Dates After College), with Single Player BrandonTimestamps for lazy nerds:00:00:00 Intro00:01:14 What Makes Him a Nerd00:02:30 Life Before Coaching00:06:43 The Dating App Experience00:10:52 Quantity vs Quality00:12:12 Troubleshooting Dating00:16:23 Experience with Previous Dating Coach00:18:07 Date Like A Nerd Coaching00:24:27 Just Be Yourself00:36:51 Why There's No "Right Thing"00:42:36 Knowing Yourself00:45:45 Accountability in Coaching00:47:33 Quick Results00:51:17 Where to Meet Someone00:54:58 Online Dating Improvements00:59:19 Social Anxiety Improvements01:00:31 A Piece of Advice#datingtips #datingadvice #dating #nerdlife #nerd #gamer #single #socialskills #podcastContact:[email protected] or@datelikeanerd on social media

🏋️‍♀️ Afraid to approach your gym crush? Most dating advice tells you to "just be confident and approach them," but does that actually work at the gym? The gym should be a safe space, kind of like your respawn point, where you recharge after a tough day. People go there to lift weights and decompress, not to be hit on by random NPCs. So how do you bridge that gap? 🤨👨🏻‍💻 In this episode, Jordan Yaklin, an online health and lifestyle coach who helps gamers level up their fitness and reclaim their health, breaks down why the gym is a completely different dungeon than bars, dating apps, or cold approaching strangers 👀💡 If you've ever wondered when it's okay (and how) to start a conversation, how to tell if someone's open to chatting, or what separates a friendly gym regular from a creep who makes everyone uncomfortable, you will gain the clarity you've been searching for. 🎯 Whether you're a gamer who's new to the fitness meta or an introvert who struggles with small talk, this episode will help you gain enough charisma to navigate gym social dynamics. Just like 68% of nerd couples who started as friends, the gym can be one of the best places to meet people who share your goals. You just need the right build for it 💪🎧 Press Start to learn how to approach your gym crush without being creepy! 🧟👾 FREE GUIDE: WHERE NERDS REALLY MEET THEIR PLAYER 2 🕹️Based on real-world nerd data. Download it at https://datelikeanerd.com/reality📱 Have questions? Join me on Discord! https://www.datelikeanerd.com/discordJordan's Links:https://www.instagram.com/jordanyaklin/discord.gg/pnfW7jZp42Related Episodes:Beat the Fear of Rejection Through Your Gamer’s Journey, with Dr. Daniel KaufmannGamify Your Dating Anxiety, with Michael BergerThe Nice Guy vs the Kind Man, with AprilHow to Make Nerd Friends, with Pete “Belmont”The Hidden Cost of Finding Love With Red Pill Dating: John’s Nerd Love StoryTimestamps for lazy nerds:00:00:00 Intro00:01:08 How to Approach Your Gym Crush00:02:01 Gym Etiquette00:04:53 Fear of Looking Dumb00:07:08 Gradual Escalation00:09:27 Benefits of Making Friends00:11:14 Meeting Outside the Gym00:13:32 How to Show You're A Nerd00:15:29 Your Safe Spaces00:20:28 Gaining Confidence and Energy00:23:28 Gamifying Social Skills00:29:48 Conversation Starters for the Gym00:36:12 Jordan's Contact#datingtips #datingadvice #dating #nerdlife #nerd #gamer #single #socialskills #podcastContact:[email protected] or@datelikeanerd on social media

🏫 How do you find dates after you're done with college? 🕰️ For many people, high school and uni gave us the perfect place to meet people. But once that's over, what do you do? How can you meet someone to date if you're not meeting... well, basically anyone? 🤷📜 After graduating, Brandon went from having built-in social circles to basically meeting nobody new. His dating life? Non-existent. His social life? Hanging out with the same small group of friends 2-3 times a year. His solution attempts? Cold approaches (didn't work) and dating apps (traumatizing) 😰🏢 "I'm stuck in the office for most of the time," Brandon explains. Between his 9-to-5 and studying for nursing boards, he's caught in the classic post-college trap: knowing he wants to meet someone but having zero clue where to start and feeling like he has no time to do it.🥘 If you're feeling "cooked" because college social life seems like a distant memory, this episode breaks down exactly how to transform solo activities into friend-making (and potentially date-finding) opportunities 💘🎧 Press Start and learn how to set your single-player hobbies to multi-player mode!👾 FREE GUIDE: WHERE NERDS REALLY MEET THEIR PLAYER 2 🕹️Based on real-world nerd data. Download it at https://datelikeanerd.com/reality📱 Have questions? Join me on Discord! https://www.datelikeanerd.com/discordRelated:The Tolkien Association: Where to Meet Nerds, with VirFind Your Nerd Community: Where to Meet Nerds, with JoseAnimé Los Angeles: Where to Meet Nerds, with MattFind Love Through Online Games, with Kaylee LopezHobbit Hike: Where to Meet Nerds, with Sompi HarmetzDating In The Tolkien Association, with JoseHow to Make Nerd Friends, with Pete “Belmont”Where can Nerds Find a Partner? (Without Dating Apps!)Challenges of Dating Without Apps (for Shy, Introverted Nerds)How to Find Groups and Socialize as a Shy, Introverted Nerd (Step-By-Step Guide)I Surveyed 273 Nerds in Canada: Here's The Dating Strategy That WorkedTimestamps for lazy nerds:00:00:00 Intro00:01:02 Dating Life After College00:05:03 Dating App Trauma00:09:57 Getting Rejected00:18:26 Riot Games Arena00:20:33 Where to Meet Someone00:24:35 Step 1: Your Hobbies00:29:45 Step 2: Where to Meet People00:33:00 No Free Time to Socialize00:35:18 Socializing with Snowboarding00:40:05 Being shy... or not?00:46:26 Socializing At The Riot Games Arena00:53:14 A Video Shoot Missed Opportunity00:58:48 Having Options to Meet Someone01:03:53 Difficulties for Meeting Partners#datingtips #datingadvice #dating #nerdlife #nerd #gamer #single #socialskills #podcast #postcollege #officejob #skateboarding #surfing #esports #riotgamesContact:[email protected] or@datelikeanerd on social media

≠ Many of us are different in one way or another, so we try to fit into the social mold. Whether it is being asexual, or a preference like not drinking or doing drugs, playing video games, or anything else that makes us different, dealing with a world where we're different has its challenges 🛑In this episode, Elyse shares her experience as an asexual woman 🙅‍♀️ From her early teens pretending to have crushes, to struggling to communicate with people and partners who couldn't understand or accept her the way she is. Because the pressures come not only from partners who (supposedly) care about you. They can also come from strangers who think they know better 🤨💁 Whether you're asexual, you know someone who is, or you feel like parts of you don't fit with society in general, this episode will hopefully help you. Many of us have experienced social pressures trying to force us into other people's molds. But that doesn't mean that we have to disrespect our boundaries just to accommodate 🚧🎧 Press Start and play the games you want to play without worrying about others!👾 FREE GUIDE: WHERE NERDS REALLY MEET THEIR PLAYER 2 🕹️Based on real-world nerd data. Download it at https://datelikeanerd.com/reality📱 Have questions? Join me on Discord! https://www.datelikeanerd.com/discordElyse's Links: https://linktr.ee/princessbilboRelated Episodes: Cosplayers and Conventions, the Nerd Love Story of Elyse and MattAnimé Los Angeles: Where to Meet Nerds, with MattFind Your Nerd Community: Where to Meet Nerds, with JoseThe Tolkien Association: Where to Meet Nerds, with VirDating In The Tolkien Association, with JoseHow to Make Nerd Friends, with Pete “Belmont”Timestamps for lazy nerds:00:00:00 Intro00:01:04 Challenges Dating as Asexual00:04:36 Not Fitting Into The Norm00:07:00 Outside Pressures and Expectations00:11:36 Relationship Struggles00:13:10 Dating Tips for Asexuals00:16:35 Friends to Lovers00:21:56 Friends Getting Married00:24:11 Feeling Out of PlaceContact:[email protected] or@datelikeanerd on social media

💊 What happens when red pill advice "works"? John thought he'd found the cheat code to dating when his nerdy high school friend got a girlfriend using pickup artist tactics. But after years of grinding bars and clubs, he discovered the hidden costs of building relationships on a foundation of masks 🎭👨‍💻 In this episode, a 40-something programmer shares his journey from socially isolated nerd to pickup artist practitioner to married father, and the unexpected ways those dating experiences still affect his relationships today. John also opens up about performance anxiety, avoidant attachment, and the challenge of taking off the masks he's worn for so long 👺🥷 We explore the darker side of the pickup artist and red pill communities: the confidence that's really avoidance, the "success" that leads to deeper insecurity, and why pretending to be someone else can make it impossible to believe anyone could love the real you 😰 John's story reveals how the very techniques designed to help socially awkward nerds connect actually prevented him from forming the deep, trusting relationships he was seeking.🛑 But this isn't just a cautionary tale. John also shares what he's learned through therapy about attachment theory, the importance of authentic friendship-first connections, and why the journey to genuine intimacy is worth the work. Even if you're approaching 50 and still figuring it out! 👴👯‍♀️ If you've ever been tempted by pickup artist or red pill advice, wondered why mainstream dating tips don't work for nerds like you, or struggled with feeling like you have to perform to be loved, John's honest reflection offers both validation and hope.🎧 Press Start to discover why leveling up your game may not be worth the grind! 💪👾 FREE GUIDE: WHERE NERDS REALLY MEET THEIR PLAYER 2 🕹️Based on real-world nerd data. Download it at https://datelikeanerd.com/reality📱 Have questions? Join me on Discord! https://www.datelikeanerd.com/discordRelated Episodes:Rejected, Friendzoned, and Not Reading the SignalsPhysical Escalation from Friends to Lovers: the Nerd Love Story of Jose and JulianGamify Your Dating AnxietyThe Nice Guy vs the Kind Man, with AprilDating In The Tolkien Association, with JoseHow to Make Nerd Friends, with Pete “Belmont”Timestamps for lazy nerds:00:00:00 Intro00:02:22 What Makes "John" A Nerd00:05:42 Dating On The Spectrum00:10:31 Intro To The Pickup Artist Scene00:14:53 Becoming Someone Else00:19:51 Introverts Do Find Love00:23:19 Dating Success But Performance Anxiety00:29:32 The Source Of Insecurity00:35:58 Marriage Problems00:41:18 Fake It Till You Make It00:46:14 Becoming Confident00:52:51 The Real Red Pill01:01:15 Closing#datingtips #datingadvice #dating #nerdlife #nerd #gamer #single #socialskills #podcast #pickupartist #redpillContact:[email protected] or@datelikeanerd on social media

😭 Meeting your Player 2 organically can be a challenging quest. It involves balancing making friends while keeping an eye out for potential connections. Sometimes, people in a certain group don't share your same passions. Or perhaps not as much as you'd hope. So, how do you move forward? 🤔In this episode, Pete and I talk about how we socialize, whether the others share our same interests or not 💬 Because sometimes what can seem like a rejection, may in fact turn into an engaging conversation for everyone. You just need a little imagination! 💭🙈 Pete also shared how he went from being a shy, quiet, serious kid to being comfortable talking to everyone. Just like Attachment Theory teaches, it often involves the support of other people. In his case, with the help of other kids who invited him to hang out 🥳💪 This validation of Pete's hobbies gave him the security that he had nothing to be ashamed of as a nerd. Even more so nowadays, with Marvel, Fantasy, and Anime being so popular! 🧙‍♂️🎧 Are you ready to become a social nerd? Press Start!👾 Most nerd relationships start as friendships. Download the FREE GUIDE: WHERE NERDS REALLY MEET THEIR PLAYER 2 at https://datelikeanerd.com/reality 🕹️📱 Have questions? Join me on Discord! https://www.datelikeanerd.com/discordPete's Links:https://linktr.ee/be1monthttps://www.instagram.com/be1mont_lotr/https://www.youtube.com/@be1mont_lotrhttps://bsky.app/profile/be1mont.bsky.socialhttps://www.tiktok.com/@be1mont_lotrhttps://www.youtube.com/@voicesofardaRelated Episodes:The High School Reunion: the Nerd Love Story of Pete and ArianaHobbit HikeFind Love Through Online Games, with Kaylee LopezDating In The Tolkien AssociationAnimé Los AngelesFind Your Nerd Community: Where to Meet Nerds, with JoseThe Tolkien Association: Where to Meet Nerds, with VirTimestamps for lazy nerds:00:00:00 Intro00:00:41 Where to Meet Your Player 200:02:26 Being a Creep00:04:32 Talking About Your Hobbies00:07:11 Dealing With Rejection00:10:56 Not Being Too Serious00:16:07 Gaining Confidence00:21:14 ClosingContact:[email protected] or@datelikeanerd on social media

💔 How can you find someone to date when dating apps aren't working for you, and all you do is work, stay at home, and meet with the same D&D group or spend full days with one single person at a time playing Warhammer? 🧌In this episode, Kirk shared his challenges to date as a single nerd 😰 Like many people, he was promised that "if you focus on yourself and sort your life out, someone will naturally come." Unfortunately, that was not the case. He found a steady job and a home, but nobody to share his life with 🏡📱 Since dating apps weren't working, he decided to shelf the thought of a partner and focus on hobbies like Warhammer and TTRPG. Ironically, that's what led to his first date ever. Even though Kirk started feeling like he was way too busy and almost without options, he managed to find a date. And in the same way that he found one, he can find another. And so can you 🫵Sometimes, we create our characters in ways that don't help us reach our complete specific quests 🤬 We thought a certain build would do the trick for every single area, but that's often not the case. 🏢 The life you thought would lead to happiness may feel more like a trap than anything else. In those cases, taking a step back and thinking of ways to find your Player 2 may be the best strategy. Like Kirk, with some brainstorming and looking at your past successes, you may find a way to defeat the BBEG and get the loot! 🪙🎧 Are you ready? PRESS START! 👾👾 FREE GUIDE: WHERE NERDS REALLY MEET THEIR PLAYER 2 🕹️Based on real-world nerd data. Download it at https://datelikeanerd.com/reality📱 Have questions? Join me on Discord! https://www.datelikeanerd.com/discordRelated Episodes:Find Love Through Online Games, with Kaylee LopezIRL Lessons from Video Games, with Dr. Daniel KaufmannPhysical Escalation from Friends to Lovers: the Nerd Love Story of Jose and JulianShy meets Socially Anxious, and Going Slow: the Nerd Love Story of Steven and ChristinTimestamps for lazy nerds:#datingtips #datingadvice #dating #nerdlife #nerd #gamer #single #socialskills #podcastContact:[email protected] or@datelikeanerd on social media

👯 What does dating within a nerd community look like? Finding a group you're comfortable with can help you "just be yourself" and find your Player 2. 🙌 It also means you'll be enjoying yourself until that happens, which makes you more attractive!🧙‍♂️ In this episode, Jose and I discuss what it was like to date within the Argentine Tolkien Association, where we met. Just like a Skill Tree, each friend you make can introduce you to others who are similar. From within those people, you may end up finding your Player 2... as long as you focus on expanding your network with like-minded friends.👀 And that's exactly what we saw. Almost everyone there found someone to date (or have "something" with). Almost. Because some people were trying too hard, and that was what kept everyone away. Both as friends and as benefits 😔🎧 If you want someone to give The One Ring to, listen to this episode! 💍💬 And if you're wondering where you can meet your Player 2 organically, here are 200+ ideas and a guide to help you on your Quest! Download them here for FREE: https://www.datelikeanerd.com/where📱Join me on Discord! https://www.datelikeanerd.com/discordRelated Episodes:The Tolkien Association: Where to Meet Nerds, with VirFind Your Nerd Community: Where to Meet Nerds, with JoseTolkien meets Star Wars: The Nerd Love Story of Kaia and CelaniaPhysical Escalation from Friends to Lovers: The Nerd Love Story of Jose and JulianTimestamps for lazy nerds:00:00:00 Intro00:54:09 What to Do and NOT to Do00:06:06 "Just Be Yourself"00:08:44 Choosing Who You Want to Be and Date00:11:53 Go Slow With Your Nerdom00:15:40 Conversation Tips for Info-Dumping Nerds00:19:07 Find Your Community First#datingtips #datingadvice #dating #nerdlife #nerd #gamer #single #socialskills #podcast #tolkien #lotrContact:[email protected] or@datelikeanerd on social media

🦾 What you consider success and achievements in real life could be similar to how you play video games. Dr. Daniel Kaufmann is back to share how learning what we value in video games reflects what we may also value IRL 🌎Understanding your player type can help you make choices that align with your personality 🤓 Knowing how you play video games can say a lot about the types of challenges you thrive on and how you prefer to overcome them. This new information can help you make choices that align with what you enjoy, helping you get over obstacles and get yourself in situations where you can thrive! 🏆But just like with any other model of personality type, these are characteristics that can change over time 📈 You likely don't play only one specific type of video game, so you're also likely to enjoy different things in real life. However, using these as guidelines can be the start to enjoying your life to the full 🤩🖤 Dating, like most things in life, has its own set of challenges. The cheat code is to choose the ones we're more likely to enjoy or, at least, find tolerable enough to overcome ⛰️Are you ready to learn more about yourself? Listen now and start choosing the best challenges for your player type!👾 FREE GUIDE: WHERE NERDS REALLY MEET THEIR PLAYER 2 🕹️Based on real-world nerd data. Download it at https://datelikeanerd.com/realityGuest BioDr. Daniel Kaufmann is a YouTube Partner as Dr. Gameology, where he teaches about the many positive elements of video games that help us overcome professional and personal journeys in real life.He is an Associate Professor who’s helped develop programs for gaming and geek therapy training in clinical settings, and his publications cover video games, personality theory, online education, and counselor development. Dr. Kaufmann recently published the book The Gamer’s Journey, to help you turn the themes found in many video games into life lessons that can unlock your own potential. Socials: @DrGameology https://www.youtube.com/@DrGameology https://www.instagram.com/drgameology/ https://www.facebook.com/DrGameology https://www.twitch.tv/drgameology Other Linkshttps://drgameology.com/ https://discord.com/invite/3bY5u5EBcn Podcasthttps://drgameology.com/podcast/ Book: The Gamer's Journey https://www.amazon.com/Gamers-Journey-Daniel-Kaufmann-PhD-ebook/dp/B0D7NY5Z1RRelated Episodes:Beat the Fear of Rejection Through Your Gamer’s JourneyGamify Your Dating AnxietyFind Love Through Online GamesTimestamps for lazy nerds:00:00:00 Intro00:01:23 Gamer Personality Types00:07:00 Learn From Your Player Type00:12:28 Understanding Personality Types00:17:58 What Playing Baldur's Gate 3's Dark Urge Says About You00:20:48 Takeaways From "The Gamer's Journey"00:22:21 Contact InfoContact:[email protected] or@datelikeanerd on social media

📆 High school crushes don't have to end with the academic year. Sometimes, relationships may benefit from a respawn much later. After gaining more XP, both players gain new ways to play together. What used to be two solo players may turn into a Co-Op game 💍In this episode, Pete "Belmont" shares how he lost contact with his high school crush, only to meet again 10 years later at their high school reunion 🧑‍🏫 Though still platonic, that encounter later developed into a close friendship that naturally grew into a romantic relationship.👻 For many couples, friendship is just the stepping stone towards a fulfilling relationship. Rather than fearing the Friend Zone, Pete shares how it was a natural transition for them. He finds that communicating your wants and needs is key. It's all about showing yourself to the world, including your interests and hobbies 🧩🤓 Both Pete and Ariana were nerds, though with slightly different tastes. But because neither of them hid it, and they accepted each other, many of their interests now overlap. To the point that she now watches more anime than he! 🖥️If you want a Player 2 who joins your nerd Quests (including a Hobbit banquet with a LotR marathon), this is the episode for you! 🍖🎧 Press Start to go on an adventure... for two! ⛰️🖤 WHERE TO MEET YOUR PLAYER 2 ORGANICALLY🎮200+ places and a walkthrough to guide you on your Quest!Download for FREE at https://www.datelikeanerd.com/wherePete's Links:https://linktr.ee/be1monthttps://www.instagram.com/be1mont_lotr/https://www.youtube.com/@be1mont_lotrhttps://bsky.app/profile/be1mont.bsky.socialhttps://www.tiktok.com/@be1mont_lotrhttps://www.youtube.com/@voicesofardaTimestamps for lazy nerds:00:00:00 Intro00:41:20 What Makes Pete a Nerd00:02:38 The High School Crush00:05:00 Escalating from Friends to Lovers00:06:12 Discovering a Fellow Nerd00:09:55 Friends to Lovers Transition00:11:03 The Friend Zone00:16:08 Being Confident in Your Nerd Self00:21:19 Closing#datingtips #datingadvice #dating #nerdlife #nerd #gamer #socialskills #podcast #lotr #tolkien #hobbit #animeContact:[email protected] or@datelikeanerd on social media

🧝‍♀️ Wish you could find your Fellowship without having to roll a Nat 20 on charisma? Many shy, introverted nerds want to touch grass and be more sociable... without having to join extrovert quests! If that's you, Hobbit Hike could be the perfect solution! 🙌In this episode, Sompi invites us to join “Hobbit Hike”, a magical, costume-friendly adventure where nerds, geeks, and gamers gather to touch grass, twirl swords, and unlock their social tree ⚔️ Whether you’re a veteran cosplayer, a D&D dice goblin, or just someone who’d rather sit on a rock in the forest than shout over a hentai lounge, this episode will show you a new way to build your party.🤯 Hobbit Hike exploded from a handful of cosplay friends to a 70+ member stronghold, all while keeping things introvert-friendly and low-pressure. Sompi’s “assigned extroverts” and buddy systems make sure even the quietest newcomers find their people. With a mix of easy hikes and whimsical costumes, you'll find that the best connections happen when you’re not racing to the finish line 🏁🎧 Ready to level up your social life and unlock the Tolkien branch of your social tree? Press start and let’s go on an adventure! 🧙‍♂️🖤 WHERE (AND HOW) TO MEET SOMEONE ORGANICALLY! 🎮 FREE WALKTHROUGH with 200+ ideas and a guide to help you on your Relationship Quest! Download it for free at https://www.datelikeanerd.com/where📱 Have questions? Join me on Discord! https://www.datelikeanerd.com/discordAbout SompiSompi is the founder of Healthbar Fitness, where she helps nerds, geeks, and gamers level up their health without abandoning the hobbies they love. Her journey began with personal struggles with negative body image and extreme dieting, including a stint in competitive bodybuilding that left her trapped in unhealthy cycles.Now, Sompi is on a mission to help other nerds achieve similar transformations. Beyond online coaching, she organizes Hobbit Hike in Las Vegas, where people hike in Renaissance festival outfits, and runs a vibrant Discord community with book clubs, movie nights, and craft sessions.At Healthbar Fitness, Sompi understands that true health includes community and personal growth—it's about building a balanced character sheet for real life while still having fun with the things you love.Sompi's Links:https://discord.gg/8jtQZR2YeFhttps://www.youtube.com/@sompiharmetzhttps://www.instagram.com/sompiharmetz/Related Episodes:The Tolkien AssociationFind Your Nerd CommunityAnimé Los AngelesTolkien meets Star WarsFind Love Through Online GamesTimestamps for lazy nerds:00:00:00 Intro00:01:22 What's Hobbit Hike00:02:47 Who Joins Hobbit Hike00:04:10 Fitness Level Required00:06:34 A Different Hike00:07:46 Helping Introverts Fit In00:14:56 Checkin In On Attendees00:17:08 Reading Signs of Interest00:19:21 Keeping Everyone Safe00:24:08 Connecting Outside Hobbit Hike00:27:06 Start Your Own!00:27:48 Contact InfoContact:[email protected] or@datelikeanerd on social media

💬 Finding love on Discord is possible. Even if your Player 2 is the streamer who created the server. That said, there are some things you should keep in mind and that you want to avoid. After all, you can't meet anyone in person if you get banned! 📵In this episode, GamerMomLuna and Jason share how they went from a Twitch chat NPC to streamer relationship to a co-op campaign building a life under the same roof 🏡 It wasn't an overnight evolution, and it wasn't planned, either.🖥️ Jason had been watching Luna's streams and participating in the chat for a while before deciding to join her Discord. There, he was just another member joining random conversations. One day, a single thread turned into an epic-long dialogue. The rest of the server wasn’t invested, but they’d rolled a natural 20 on connection. It was time to move to a private conversation 🤫☝️ They are the perfect example of how to transition from regular chat to DM. It's not about finding an excuse good enough to slide into someone's DMs. After all, they can block you, report you, or ghost you. It's about knowing that they want to hear from you as much as you want to hear from them 🙂‍↕️Once there, the usual conversation rules apply. Talk about your shared passions, and get to know the person behind the screen. Eventually, the curiosity might kick in, and you can go on a date, hang out, or even invite them to your next TTRPG session! 🎲🎧 Press play if you're hoping to meet someone online! 🛜🖤 FREE GUIDE: Where (And How) To Meet Your Player 2 Organically 🎮 200+ ideas and a guide to help you on your Relationship Quest! Download it for free at https://www.datelikeanerd.com/where📱 Have questions? Join me on Discord! https://www.datelikeanerd.com/discordDonate to Extra Life: https://www.extra-life.org/participant/GamerMom-LunaLuna's Links:https://linktr.ee/GamerMomLunahttps://www.twitch.tv/gamermomlunahttps://www.youtube.com/@GamerMomLunahttps://www.threads.net/@gamermomlunahttps://www.instagram.com/gamermomluna/https://www.tiktok.com/@thegamermomlunaRelated Episodes:Find Love Through Online Games, with Kaylee Lopez https://www.datelikeanerd.com/podcast/find-love-through-online-games/The TTRPG Group https://www.datelikeanerd.com/podcast/the-ttrpg-group/Rejected, Friendzoned, and Not Reading the Signals https://www.datelikeanerd.com/podcast/rejected-friendzoned-nerd-love-story/Find Your Nerd Community https://www.datelikeanerd.com/podcast/nerd-community/Timestamps for lazy nerds:00:00:00 Intro00:00:43 What Makes Them Nerds00:02:01 Twitch Streamer's Discord00:06:16 Transitioning to DMs00:10:11 More Than Friends00:13:41 First Date00:19:23 Making it Official00:21:54 Avoiding The Friend Zone00:26:48 From Discord to DMs00:28:20 Extra LifeContact:[email protected] or@datelikeanerd on social media

👾 How do people find a partner who plays online video games? It often feels like you're damned if you join a community looking for a relationship, and you're damned if you don't (because how else can you meet someone outside dating apps?!) 🤨🎮 In this episode, I talk to Kaylee Lopez, an anthropologist who writes about gaming and game communities. We explore the ways you can integrate yourself into communities, unlock the gamer branch of your Social Tree, and find your Player 2. Literally! 🕹️⌨️ Meeting gamers has its own set of challenges that are different from meeting people IRL 🖥️ On the one hand, most people don't play video games to find their soulmate (just like with most communities). So even if you're brave enough to approach NPCs, most people don't want to be hit on immediately 🙅💬 On top of that, if you do start talking to someone and hitting it off with them... you know absolutely nothing about them. And even if you did and had some interaction, whether you'd get along in person remains uncertain.And to top it off, even if all of that does work out... they may live too far away from you! ✈️ So even if you manage to find your soulmate, they may exist all the way across the world with neither of you wanting to move 🌎So with all of these odds against you, could it ever happen? The answer is YES.🎧 Press Start to learn how to find your Player 2! 🧑‍💻🖤 FREE GUIDE: Where (And How) To Meet Your Player 2 Organically 🎮 200+ ideas and a guide to help you on your Relationship Quest! Download it for free at https://www.datelikeanerd.com/where📱 Have questions? Join me on Discord! https://www.datelikeanerd.com/discordAbout Kaylee LopezKaylee is an anthropologist who writes about gaming and game communities. She's also a certified therapeutic game master, game writer, and game editor.Kaylee's Links:https://kayleelopez.com/https://www.instagram.com/the_gaming_anthropologist/https://www.threads.com/@the_gaming_anthropologisthttp://patreon.com/anthroriotRelated Episodes:Find Your Nerd Community https://www.datelikeanerd.com/podcast/nerd-community/The Tolkien Association https://www.datelikeanerd.com/podcast/the-tolkien-association/Text Confession Gone Wrong, No Proper Dates, and Critical Fails https://www.datelikeanerd.com/podcast/text-confession-no-dates/Timestamps for lazy nerds:00:00:00 Intro00:00:58 Finding Love Within Online Games00:04:56 Joining With Honesty00:07:47 IRL vs Online Chemistry00:09:56 Find Gamers In Your Area00:14:16 Expanding Your Social Tree00:18:05 Breakups Within CommunitiesContact:[email protected] or@datelikeanerd on social media

👀 Can your Tolkien hyperfixation get in the way of your Love at First Sight? Love at first sight is rare. But if it happened, what would you do? Would you talk to them or text them first? What if they don't like you? What if you don't know what to talk about? What if you have nothing in common? Or worse, what if you overwhelm them with your hyperfixation about Tolkien? There's only one way to find out. 👇In this episode, Kaia shares how she managed to date her now-fianceé... with a little help from her boss. 👨🏻‍💼 Because Kaia knew she wanted to marry Celania as soon as they met. But her social anxiety blocked her from a conversation in person or even via text! 😫🧝‍♀️ One of Kaia's fears was related to her passion for Tolkien's work. The same hyperfixation that led her to become a Tolkien-centered content creator didn't help her when relating to others. She knew she would often overshare information about the Lord of the Rings. Way more often (and longer) than most people enjoyed. 🥱And she was right. However, she didn't know Celania was into Star Wars and LEGO 🪐 Not LotR. Fantasy and sci-fi can be considered opposite fandoms. But they're still close enough that they'll understand each other better than most. Over time, however, they became interested in each other's passions, which built more trust and security and strengthened their relationship.🙅‍♀️ Sometimes, people won't share your interests or humor. And that's ok. But if you take small steps and test for their interest slowly, you might find someone who'll want to spend their life with you 💍🎧 Listen to this episode to find a partner who enjoys your hyperfixation! 💪🖤 WHERE TO MEET YOUR PLAYER 2 ORGANICALLY🎮200+ places and a walkthrough to guide you on your Quest!Download for FREE at https://www.datelikeanerd.com/where📱Join me on Discord! https://www.datelikeanerd.com/discordKaia Kay's Links:https://beacons.ai/kaiakayyhttps://www.instagram.com/kaiakayy/https://youtube.com/@kaiakayyhttps://www.tiktok.com/@kaiakayshttps://bsky.app/profile/kaiakayy.bsky.socialhttps://www.threads.net/@kaiakayyRelated Episodes:Text Confession Gone Wrong, No Proper Dates, and Critical FailsShy meets Socially Anxious, and Going SlowThe Tolkien AssociationFind Your Nerd CommunityTimestamps for lazy nerds:00:00:00 Intro00:00:36 What Makes Kaia a Nerd00:02:15 Love at First Sight00:04:01 Fear of Rejection00:05:12 Info-Dumping00:05:59 Afraid to Text Your Crush00:10:07 Testing for Compatibility with Humor00:15:03 Forced First Date00:19:05 Disclosing Your Sexuality00:23:51 Signs of a Good Date00:24:59 Second Date00:26:27 Unprepared for Conversation00:28:47 Avoiding Info-Dumping00:36:15 Dealing with Opposing Fandoms00:40:18 Kaia's Contacts#datingtips #datingadvice #dating #nerdlife #nerd #gamer #single #socialskills #podcast #tolkien #lotr #starwarsContact:[email protected] or@datelikeanerd on social media

😇 The alternative to being a Nice Guy™ is often considered to be a Bad Boy 👨‍🎤 Because many people think that the problem is being a good person. And, sure, some people might be attracted to that... in the short term. But if you're looking to build a healthy and loving relationship, you may want to look into becoming a Kind Person, instead 😌🖤 In this episode, April returns to share what made her fall for her husband Scott. It wasn't his wealth (he lived in an RV), or being a nerd (he watched Star Trek and played video games), or his physique (we'll just believe her with that). It was him being "the kindest man she'd ever known." 😍🤔 What sometimes goes wrong with Nice Guys™ is giving with unspoken (and not agreed upon) expectations (a.k.a. manipulation) and a lack of boundaries. Some examples could be giving gifts or doing favors for someone you don't have a close relationship with, often at the expense of your own problems, expecting them to like you or do something for/with you 🎁❌ If you feel like you've been rejected for being a Nice Guy™ and you have to turn into a Bad Boy, give this episode a listen. You'll find many ways to become more attractive as a kind, good, and generous person 💪🎧 Listen now and trade the Nice Guy™ for the Kind Person!🖤 FREE GUIDE: Where (And How) To Meet Your Player 2 Organically 🎮 200+ ideas and a guide to help you on your Relationship Quest! Download it for free at https://www.datelikeanerd.com/where📱 Have questions? Join me on Discord! https://www.datelikeanerd.com/discordApril's Nerd Love Story: https://www.datelikeanerd.com/podcast/nerd-wedding/Boundaries Blog Post: https://www.datelikeanerd.com/skills/shields-boundaries/Vulnerability Blog Post: https://www.datelikeanerd.com/skills/be-like-a-barbarian-be-vulnerable/Socials: https://www.instagram.com/legiodith13https://www.threads.net/@legiodith13https://bsky.app/profile/legiodith.bsky.socialTimestamps for lazy nerds:00:00:00 Intro00:00:41 Being a Nice Guy00:04:52 Kind Person Behaviors00:09:07 Working on Your Mental Health00:13:31 Weird Acts of Kindness00:17:18 Boundary Problems with Nice GuysContact:[email protected] or@datelikeanerd on social media

🍜 Looking for a waifu, husbando, or just a partner who enjoys anime? Animé Los Angeles could be the perfect place for you to unlock the weeb branch of your Social Tree. Whether you like to cosplay, read manga, or even build miniatures, there are many ways for you to meet people over this 4-day event!🍣 In this episode, Matthew Lewis shares how otakus can socialize at Animé Los Angeles. Every day, you'll have opportunities to make friends who share your passion for all things anime-related. Some of these are built-in, and others you can initiate yourself 🥷🎙️ One option is designed as a speed-dating type of event (to make friends): you'll have a few minutes to talk 1-on-1 or in small groups. However, unlike regular speed dating, you'll get to cross paths with these people for the rest of the event!🤖 Another option is activities where talking is not the focus, such as assembling model kits. In this case, you can take it slow and simply focus on what you're doing until you feel comfortable enough to start a conversation. 🦾 We also share with you some tips to start conversations this way.And speaking of starting conversations, cosplayers are often open to interacting with people who share a passion for their character or show they're cosplaying. 👺 As a cosplayer himself, Matt shared how (and when) he likes to be approached, what kind of interactions he likes to have, and what is generally expected and accepted by the cosplay community 🧛🎧 Want to meet other weebs? Listen to this episode to get some inspiration! 💡🖤 FREE GUIDE: Where (And How) To Meet Your Player 2 Organically 🎮 200+ ideas and a guide to help you on your Relationship Quest! Download it for free at https://www.datelikeanerd.com/where📱 Have questions? Join me on Discord! https://www.datelikeanerd.com/discordAnimé Los Angeles:Get your badge! https://animelosangeles.org/registration/attendee-registration/https://animelosangeles.org/https://www.instagram.com/anime_los_angeleshttps://www.facebook.com/AnimeLosAngelesConhttps://discord.com/invite/Axu3BDncMatthew Lewis:https://maguma.carrd.co/https://www.instagram.com/maguma.usagi/Related Episodes:Find Your Nerd Community: Where to Meet Nerds, with Jose https://www.datelikeanerd.com/podcast/nerd-community/Cosplayers and Conventions: the Nerd Love Story of Elyse and Matt https://www.datelikeanerd.com/podcast/cosplayers-and-conventions/Timestamps for lazy nerds:00:00:00 Intro00:00:40 What is Animé Los Angeles00:01:36 Icebreaker Activities00:04:47 Connecting Through Activities00:05:41 NOT Speed Dating00:07:26 Interactive Socializing00:08:42 How To Make Friends00:11:36 Approaching Strangers00:19:41 Non-Harassment Policy00:25:34 Discord and TicketsContact:[email protected] or@datelikeanerd on social media

🦸 One convention might not be enough to get to know someone. But as you start attending more often and keeping in touch with everyone, feelings can start to develop. In the case of cosplayers, their passion for specific characters is just one more thing for them to bond over 😍Elyse was introduced to Matt by her group of cosplayer friends. They got along well and exchanged contacts on the spot 📱 However, it took a decade for them to end up together! Times just didn't align. It took several encounters and a friend's wedding for them to start chatting more often. Funnily enough, they never confessed their feelings. Matt just assumed they were dating and decided to make it public! 😱📝 This story is a great example of how making friends and meeting someone many different times can help you find your Player 2. It's not necessary to jump at someone attractive the first time you see them. And if you didn't click or didn't get their number the first time, there might be a next. It's not guaranteed. There's always an element of luck. But if that person was a part of your group of friends, you'll roll with advantage 🎲Being part of a group of friends doesn't mean seeing the same people at the same recurring events, though 👀 It means developing relationships with them where you all meet to do different activities and get to know each other in different contexts. In their case, Elyse and Matt not only met at conventions, but the pivotal point was their friend's wedding. Not a convention. 💒💡 So keep these lessons in mind next time you go socializing! Saw someone you wanted to talk to but didn't get to? There could be another time! 🤩🎧 Press Start and see how cosplaying and conventions could lead to your Player 2!🖤 FREE GUIDE: WHERE (AND HOW) TO MEET YOUR PLAYER 2 ORGANICALLY 🎮Download it at https://www.rolltodate.com/where📱Join me on Discord! https://www.datelikeanerd.com/discordElyse's Links:https://linktr.ee/princessbilbohttps://www.instagram.com/princessbilbohttps://www.tiktok.com/@princessbilbohttps://www.facebook.com/PrincessBilbohttps://www.threads.net/@princessbilboRelated Episodes: Finding Your Nerd Community, with Jose: https://www.datelikeanerd.com/podcast/nerd-community/The Tolkien Association: Where to Meet Nerds, with Vir: https://www.datelikeanerd.com/podcast/the-tolkien-association/Timestamps for lazy nerds:00:00:00 Intro00:00:58 What Makes Elyse a Nerd00:02:38 Cosplayers Introducing Each Other00:06:13 Asking for the Number00:07:47 First Impression00:09:57 Schroedinger Date00:14:15 Mismatched Timings00:16:49 Going Public Online00:19:28 Dating as Asexual00:21:23 ClosingContact:[email protected] or@datelikeanerd on social media

🔎 Finding your community can sometimes be challenging. Even within the same hobby, different groups may be polar opposites. Even within the Argentine Tolkien Association, the online forum didn't always fit with the association 🧩In this episode, I bring Jose back to talk about how we found a place where each of us felt we belonged 😌 Not feeling like we fit in with most people around us growing up, in the Argentine Tolkien Association, we found those who made us feel appreciated and welcomed. Even if we didn't "fit the popular norm." 🥰🧪 Sometimes, finding your people may take trial and error. Some communities have a demographic younger or older than what you'd like, or the people might have values that don't match yours, or they may simply not be a good match. Whatever the case may be, it's worth it to keep looking until you find your group. Even if that's just a subgroup within a larger community 👯❓ So here's a question for you: if you happened to go to the Argentine Tolkien Association, who do you think you'd like to hang out with? The official members or the forum? 🧐💬 And if you're wondering where to meet your Player 2 organically, here are 200+ ideas and a guide to help you on your Quest! Download them here for FREE: https://www.datelikeanerd.com/where📱Join me on Discord! https://www.datelikeanerd.com/discordTimestamps for lazy nerds:00:00:00 Intro00:03:14 How Jose Found the Association00:07:26 Fitting In00:12:32 Different Personalities, Same Interest00:15:43 Feeling AppreciatedContact:[email protected] or@datelikeanerd on social media

🔥 Dating Apps like Tinder often get a bad rep about what people there are looking for. But even if you start something with no strings attached, if you matched with the right person... you might end up having a nerd wedding with swords and the LOTR soundtrack! 🧝‍♂️April expected to meet a jock 💪 Someone with whom she wouldn't have much in common. Instead, she fell for a nerd. But that wasn't what they had agreed to. After all, neither of them were looking for a serious relationship. So it wasn't until one of them was vulnerable enough to express their feelings that things changed. 📝 Agreements (even romantic) can be changed and amended. They're not something fixed that once set can't be touched. It does, however, mean risking rejection. Just as confessing that you like someone, trying to change what you already agreed on carries a risk. ⚠️Is it worth it? Up to you to decide. For April and Scott, it led to a nerd marriage. 💍🖤 And if you're wondering where to meet your Player 2 organically, here are 200+ ideas and a guide to help you on your Quest! Download them here for FREE: https://www.datelikeanerd.com/where📱Join me on Discord! https://www.datelikeanerd.com/discordSocials: https://www.instagram.com/legiodith13https://www.threads.net/@legiodith13https://bsky.app/profile/legiodith.bsky.socialSteven's Interview: https://www.datelikeanerd.com/podcast/shy-meets-socially-anxious-and-going-slow/Tim Ferris' Dating Episode: https://youtu.be/3zPa7b1uq4A?si=t0grWS2U1MippFaVTimestamps for lazy nerds:00:00:00 Intro00:00:45 All-around Nerd00:01:47 Dating Intentions on Tinder00:08:48 A Long First Date00:13:45 A Star Trek Nerd!00:21:13 From Friend with Benefits to Relationship00:27:48 A Nerd Wedding#datingtips #datingadvice #dating #nerdlife #nerd #gamer #single #socialskills #podcastContact:[email protected] or@datelikeanerd on social media

👻 Fear of rejection can ruin your dating life in multiple ways: you won't start conversations, ask for a number, invite on a date, or show how you truly feel. Fortunately, you can get over it with gamification! 👾Although many video games can teach you the Growth Mindset, you may not be applying it IRL... yet 💡 And that's where gamification comes in: it can give you dopamine hits similar to video games, help you stay motivated, and give you positive reinforcement even if you don't get the results you were hoping for 😬In this interview, Michael Berger and I discuss how you can gamify your dating life to build new habits that will help you get over your fear of rejection (and many other Quests) 🧙‍♂️ This approach has one major advantage over the idea that you need "30 days of consistency to build a habit": with this gamification, you don't lose your progress if you stop. You. Don't. Lose. XP 🎮I also share my style of gamified coaching to help you get over your fears and anxieties with dating: It starts by recognizing what makes you anxious, giving it a Challenge Rating (CR score), deciding on the actions that you need to take, how much XP each action gives you, and then going out and grinding ⛏️ With a mix of gradual exposure and gamification, you'll level up in no time! ⬆️🧌 Because just like in video games, you shouldn't start by fighting the BBEG at level 1. Tackling each challenge at the appropriate level will give your body and mind time to get used to it and recognize that it's not the TPK you were expecting. Even if you can't beat it on the first try.🎧 So what're you waiting for? Listen to this episode so you can start grinding to level up! 💪Guest's Bio:Michael Berger aka BergerGames has been a fixture inside the niche of gaming on Instagram for the last two years doing the very common work of a social media personality, but recently he has been adding aspects of his professional day-to-day job as a Licensed Social Worker into his content.  Mike also trains other mental health professionals on how to have conversations about suicide, crisis de-escalation, and motivational interviewing.  Recently he’s been creating YouTube videos on the intersection of gaming and mental health, building courses teaching gamers how to take advantage of their psychology and “gamify their life.” And appearing on podcasts like this one.Links:Mike Berger's Substack: https://mikebergergames.substack.com/Socials: https://www.youtube.com/@MikeBergerGamesbsky.app/profile/mikebergergames.bsky.socialtwitch.tv/bergergames_https://www.instagram.com/bergergames/📱Join me on Discord! https://www.datelikeanerd.com/discord💬 Practice Conversation Skills playing FREE online improv games with me! https://www.datelikeanerd.com/improvTimestamps for lazy nerds:00:00:00 Intro00:00:26 Micael Berger's Bio00:01:55 Video Games and Mental Health00:05:49 Growth Mindset in Video Games00:08:24 Dopamine for Habit Formation00:11:53 Gamifying your Fear of Rejection00:16:24 The Problem with 30-Day Challenges00:20:11 Exposure to Anxiety00:24:49 Facing Rejection00:28:34 Street and Gym "Approach" ExamplesContact:[email protected] or@datelikeanerd on social media

🎲 TTRPG groups can help you make friends and even find your life partner. They're also small enough that they shouldn't cause too much anxiety. But the trick is not to limit your interaction with the other players only to game nights. Use the group to make friends outside the paper! 📝Frank's wife is fighting stage 4 cancer. Please help them in any way you can https://gofund.me/f86c12bd 📚 Frank and Mouse became friends through their college's TTRPG group. Unfortunately, she was engaged at the time, so Frank decided to respect that boundary. Many years later she invited him to spend the weekend at her place. They had stayed close friends, so Frank went down to meet her. That was when Mouse took the opportunity to tell him how she felt 🫣🤝 Making friends through a shared hobby is a great way to grow your social network, even if that hobby only involves a handful of people. In fact, TTRPGs (and many board game nights) can make it easier if you're afraid to meet large groups or if you're dealing with social anxiety. The focus is never on having conversations, so you can simply focus on the game if you don't feel like talking. 😶⏳ With time, you'll get to know all the other players. Because that's where the magic happens: You join a few games, meet them with no character sheets or dice, have real interactions, and build friendships 🥰 Eventually, you might fall in love with a fellow player, one of their friends or family, or even one of their friends' friends. 🎧 Listen to this episode before you roll for initiative! 🎲Frank's wife is fighting stage 4 cancer. Please help them in any way you can https://gofund.me/f86c12bd Timestamps for lazy nerds:00:00:00 Intro00:02:18 First Impressions00:04:26 The TTRPG Group00:06:43 Becoming Friends00:08:46 A Written Confession00:13:02 Seeing the Signs00:15:42 A History of Friendship00:17:54 Shared or Separate Hobbies00:20:47 Make Friends to Find a Relationship00:23:57 Have the Right Intentions00:26:13 Leave the Container00:30:07 Avoid Being a Creep00:34:35 Alternatives to Dating Apps00:37:50 Overcoming Social Anxiety00:43:03 Support Frank's Wife's TreatmentContact:[email protected] or@datelikeanerd on social media

🧝‍♂️ If you're into Lord of the Rings and want a partner who shares your passion, start by making friends who are also into fantasy! Vir and I found long-term relationships at our local Tolkien Association, as did most of our friends there... except for very specific people who got rejected by everyone 🙄🧓 In this episode, we reminisce about our experience meeting and dating fellow nerds with similar interests. Because while reading can be a solitary activity, it doesn't have to be a lonely hobby. It's just a matter of finding the right group of people with whom you can connect and build deep and meaningful relationships 📚And that's what you should focus on ☝️ Yes, you want to find a partner, but your main priority should be to expand your network. This way, you'll be able to find a Player 2 without needing to go to bars, clubs, or approach random people on the street that you know nothing about 🍻✋ However, if you focus solely on finding someone to date, you won't fit in with this group. While people may be open to dating, it's not a meat market. So hold your horses, have patience, and avoid the common mistakes we describe in this episode 🙅‍♂️🎧 What're you waiting for to give it a listen? Forth Eorlingas!📱Join me on Discord! https://www.datelikeanerd.com/discord💬 Practice your Conversations Skills with FREE online improv games every month... Live! https://www.datelikeanerd.com/improvArgentine Tolkien Association: https://www.facebook.com/groups/AsociacionTolkienArgentina/Timestamps for lazy nerds:00:00:00 Intro00:00:34 The Argentine Tolkien Association00:04:58 Meeting New People00:07:58 Building Deep Relationships00:11:13 Common Interests and Dating00:13:24 Not Being a Creep00:18:40 Expanding Your Network00:21:58 The Friend Zone00:25:19 How Long Does It Take?Contact:[email protected] or@datelikeanerd on social media

📺 Staying in watching Naruto and eating pizza might not be everyone's preference for a first date. But that doesn't have to stop you from finding a Player 2!🎖️ After serving in the military, Phillip moved to a new city full of extroverts. As an introverted nerd dealing with anxiety and starting to build a life from scratch, with no money or even a bed, Phillip was finding it challenging to date. But after some swiping, he found Darcy, a fellow introvert who even suggested staying in for their first date! 🛋️❌ And, no. They didn't sleep together on that first date (it was Netflix and Pizza; not Netflix and Chill). In fact, he gave her a kiss on the cheek on the 4th date! How was he not friend-zoned? He was clear from the beginning about what she could expect. And she liked him just like that. 🙌If you think you have to change who you are to find a partner, listen to Phillip's story! Phillip's links:https://alnerdstuff.com/https://www.threads.net/@nerd_stuff_of_alhttps://www.instagram.com/nerd_stuff_of_al/📱Join me on Discord! https://www.datelikeanerd.com/discord💬 Practice your Conversations Skills with FREE online improv games every month... Live! https://www.datelikeanerd.com/improvTimestamps for lazy nerds:00:00:25 Intro00:01:43 Trying to Date as an Introverted Nerd00:03:25 A Nerd on Dating Apps00:05:55 Dating App Burnout00:08:45 Being True to Yourself00:11:14 Dating Expectations00:15:41 First Date with Naruto and Pizza00:17:45 How Fast to Move on Dates00:20:24 Good Communication in Dating00:28:01 Don't Be Afraid to Be Yourself00:28:55 Contact Info#datingtips #datingadvice #dating #nerdlife #nerd #gamer #single #socialskills #introvert #datingapps #tinder #narutoContact:[email protected] or@datelikeanerd on social media

If you want to approach people, start conversations, ask for a number, or invite them on a date, one of the most useful Skills you will need is resilience. In this interview, Dr. Daniel Kaufmann shares why many of us give up before even trying, and how video games can get us closer to achieving our goals in any aspect of our lives.Part of the Hero's Journey idea is that we as spectators can identify with the hero of a story and gain Skills and motivation to improve our lives. Video games take this concept to another level: we are the ones winning. Without us, the avatar would sit still and go nowhere.This also implies that both you and your avatar will gain experience and get better as time goes by. Carol Dweck calls this the Growth Mindset. For some of us, this is an in-game lesson that we can take outside the virtual world. But for others, it's not enough to compensate for decades of the Fixed Mindset discourse. Real life just doesn't have the same opportunities and motivations as video games.But this is only one of the many lessons you can learn from video games. So what will you do? Will you stay in your comfort zone or will you start working toward your dating goals?Listen now and embark on your Gamer's Journey today!Guest BioDr. Daniel Kaufmann is a YouTube Partner as Dr. Gameology, where he teaches about the many positive elements of video games that help us overcome professional and personal journeys in real life.He is an Associate Professor who’s helped develop programs for gaming and geek therapy training in clinical settings, and his publications cover video games, personality theory, online education, and counselor development. Dr. Kaufmann recently published the book The Gamer’s Journey, to help you turn the themes found in many video games into life lessons that can unlock your own potential. Socials: @DrGameology https://www.youtube.com/@DrGameology https://www.instagram.com/drgameology/ https://www.facebook.com/DrGameology https://www.twitch.tv/drgameology Other Linkshttps://drgameology.com/ https://discord.com/invite/3bY5u5EBcn Podcast: https://drgameology.com/podcast/ The Gamer's Journey: https://www.amazon.com/Gamers-Journey-Daniel-Kaufmann-PhD-ebook/dp/B0D7NY5Z1RTimestamps for lazy nerds:00:00:00 Intro00:00:50 Bio00:02:01 How The Gamer's Journey Can Improve Your Life00:08:14 The Fixed and Growth Mindsets00:17:00 Fear of Rejection00:24:05 Conversation Skills00:32:20 What Gives You Motivation00:37:41 Contact InfoContact:[email protected] or@datelikeanerd on social media

What does a natural physical escalation look like? ✋ Physical touch varies from person to person, even within a shared culture. Some people see certain things as friendly that for others are way too intimate, or are only comfortable going slower or faster.🥋 Julian met Jose's brother learning Tae Kwon-Do. They started hanging out, and later invited Jose to join them. She didn't think much of it until almost a year later, when they started spending a lot of time together. So much time, in fact, that her friends kept asking if something was going on. She even went on a trip and he was the first person she was texting every day! That's when she realized that... she might like him 🤔😱 After the realization set in, the fears showed up: what if it didn't work and she lost both a partner and the friendship? Fortunately, she was quite sure he liked her back. They were both comfortable with physical touch with each other, which is not always the case.🎧 If you've been wondering how fast is too fast, or if there's a right or wrong way to break the physical barrier with someone, give this episode a listen!📱Join me on Discord! https://www.datelikeanerd.com/discord💬 Practice your Conversation Skills with FREE online improv games every month... Live! https://www.datelikeanerd.com/improvTimestamps for lazy nerds:00:00:00 Intro00:00:56 Her Brother's Friend00:04:02 Hanging Out 1-on-100:07:40 Fears Around Liking Your Friend00:15:23 Leaving the Friend Zone00:19:58 Breaking the Touch Barrier00:25:41 Differences in Styles of Physical Touch00:33:49 Checking if They're Comfortable00:37:07 Testing for InterestContact:[email protected] or@datelikeanerd on social media

Do you need to go fast to "avoid the friend zone"? But what if you're shy? And what if they're socially anxious? Fast or slow depends on how comfortable both of you feel. Steven and Christin were close friends for several years before anything happened.Sometimes the transition from friends to something more is quick and abrupt. Other times, it can take months or years of smooth and gradual change. 🧘‍♂️🏘️ Even though they grew up in a small German village of 600 people, Steven only remembers becoming aware of Christin around his teenage years. But it wasn't until many years later, when he left to study and came back to visit, that their deep friendship turned into a romantic relationship. 🎧 Listen to this story if you feel rushed by the common dating advice that gives you a specific number of dates before you end up in the "friend zone"!To work with Steven and Christin, visit https://www.limitlessleap.com/💬 To practice your Conversation Skills with me by playing FREE online improv games every month... LIVE, go to https://www.datelikeanerd.com/improvTimestamps for lazy nerds:00:00:00 Intro00:00:26 Steven's Hobbies00:01:32 Growing Up In a Small Village00:03:01 Are Your Hobbies A Turn-Off?00:05:20 Becoming Close Friends00:06:22 Changing Cities00:07:45 From Friends to Lovers00:11:52 Taking Your Time00:14:29 Shy, Introverts, and Social Anxiety00:16:38 Do Dating Tactics and Strategies Work?00:19:10 How Long Does It Take?00:22:31 Leveling Up Your True Self00:28:42 Be Confident and Know What You Want00:30:48 Steven's ContactContact:[email protected] or@datelikeanerd on social media

Is it a date or two friends hanging out? Do you need to clarify? Is it wrong to confess by text? What about asking to hold hands? These are some of the questions we explore in the story of Lud and Mati.🧝‍♂️ After meeting as part of a nerd group within their local Tolkien Association, Mati decided to take Lud on a date. But... she didn't know that it was a date! They spent months as friends, with him trying to know if she was interested, and her assuming that they were just friends.🎲 With multiple critical fails in the middle, it took a common friend to bridge the gap between them.🎧 Listen to this story and realize that, sometimes, even with many Natural 1s, you can still beat the game. 👾📱Join me on Discord! https://www.datelikeanerd.com/discord💬 Practice your Conversations Skills with FREE online improv games every month... Live! https://www.datelikeanerd.com/improvTimestamps for lazy nerds:00:00:00 Game Start00:01:43 Finding Nerd Friends00:04:17 First Meet at a Tolkien Bar00:06:42 Friends or date? Unclear!00:08:47 Building Relationships00:10:28 Critical Fail on a Physical Touch Check00:11:53 Not a "Proper Date"00:13:55 Second not-Date00:15:57 Indirect Confession00:18:54 Failed Confession via Text00:22:01 Do you like your friend?00:25:19 Asking to Hold Hands00:26:43 Confessing vs. Escalating00:31:38 Advice for Single Nerds00:33:54 The Power of FriendshipContact:[email protected] or@datelikeanerd on social media

Many have been rejected and friendzoned, but it's not often that we would do it to someone who did it to us. And yet, this is what happened to Vir. In her story, they both rolled a Nat 1 on their perception and charisma checks: Their attraction didn't align, and they couldn't read the signs. So they had to be explicit and confess liking each other... Three times!If you've wondered why someone doesn't realize that you like them, you think you're bad at "taking hints," or you think that the friendzone lasts forever (and that a rejection will bring your HP to 0), you should listen to this story! Join me on Discord! https://www.datelikeanerd.com/discordPractice your Conversations Skills with FREE online improv games every month... Live! https://www.datelikeanerd.com/improvTimestamps for lazy nerds:00:00:00 Intro00:02:17 Meeting at work00:04:47 Asking to hang out00:07:20 Missing the Signals00:11:36 Confessing00:14:18 Getting Rejected and Friendzoned00:20:14 Another Confession, Rejection, and Friend Zone00:24:09 Confessing Verbally vs. Escalating Physically00:27:57 Third Confession00:31:52 Advice: Don't Expect Signals, and be ClearContact:[email protected] or@datelikeanerd on social media

How do nerds find love? Where do they meet people to date? Does it have to be at a bar or club? How do they avoid the friend zone? Do they go for the kiss or confess verbally? How do they deal with the fear of rejection? Do they approach people on the street? Or do they attract their perfect matches?Level Up your Dating Skill with this podcast for introverted, shy, single geeks looking for a Player 2. I'm Alex Goldstein and I help shy nerds gain the Skills to find love.If you want to learn more, go to https://www.datelikeanerd.com/💬 Practice Conversations Skills with FREE, monthly online improv games! https://www.datelikeanerd.com/improv📱You can also join me on Discord! https://www.datelikeanerd.com/discordContact:[email protected] or@datelikeanerd on social media