PODCAST · society
Hope when there was none
by Melinda Kunst
After leaving a toxic relationship over a decade ago I embraced a journey to share my story and help others that are healing from emotional traumas, learn about self-care, and find empowerment to re-invent themselves. Here you will hear about the journey of courageous Survivors and many experts that share a passion for helping and inspiring others to awaken the beauty of life without abuse.Thanks for tuning in! I hope your day is filled with blessings, magic, and miracles!
Episodes
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Hoovering: When They Try to Pull You Back In
Today's episode is not about vacuums I promise! I'm diving into something called, "Hoovering". It's when a person sucks you back into a relationship or into contact. This is used many times if you have left that relationship or set boundaries. It can look like a promise to change, getting...
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Gray Rock: What It Is, When It May Help, and When It Can Be Dangerous
The idea is that your responses are as exciting as a dull rock. Your tears, your reactions, screams, or when you throw things this gives your abuser fuel. Don't give them what they want that is your energy. They crave your reactions. You channel boring, non-nonchalant, or canned responses. When...
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Flying Monkeys: When Other People Become Part of the Abuse
Sorry for the giggle in today's episode. Flying Monkeys... For real! They do exist and not the Wizard of Oz kind but where people in our circle share information with the abuser. There is nothing cute about this. You may wonder who you should trust and everyone looks suspicious. It could be the...
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Emotional Blackmail: When Love Comes With Strings Attached Day 13
What is Emotional blackmail? Just a reminder, with this topic and the others I have covered over the past few days, anyone in your circle is capable of using this tactic. It's not just limited to a intimate partner. Emotional blackmail is a manipulative tactic in which one party uses guilt, fear,...
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Why Does She Stay? Understanding the Barriers to Leaving an Abusive Relationship Day 12
Why does she stay?! One comment I see and hear often is, "Why Does She Stay?!" or "I would have left after the first punch!" There are many personal reasons a victim stays and these include in random order: 1) Fear- Of change or fear of the abuser 2) Guilty- Maybe she didn't try hard enough to…
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Coercive Control: When Abuse Is About Control, Not Just Conflict Day 11
So, what is this? It's a pattern of behaviors that uses control, intimidation, isolation, manipulates a person, or restrict another person's freedom. Like all the topics I have been discussing, it starts subtly. It looks like: Small rules Punishments Threats Restrictions You may wake up one day…
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Men Can Be Survivors of Abuse Day 10
I really wanted to share this episode and bring to light the topic of not only women being survivors too. Throughout the month of October, we will see stories from brave women that survived and those that didn't. I want to shed light on men and boys today. Men can experience: Physical abuse...
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Immigration Abuse: When Status Becomes a Weapon Day 9
For someone who is an immigrant, a noncitizen, or living in a household where immigration status is complicated, an abusive person may try to use that uncertainty as a weapon. Abuse is all about control. The abuser uses the status of the survivor as a way to keep control over this person. They…
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Pet Abuse: The Family Member Who Can't Tell Us What's Happening Day 8
Animal abuse isn't always separate from domestic abuse. Sometimes your pet becomes another way to control you. It can be hard for a person looking in on your situation to understand why you stay for the dog, cat, bird, etc... Our pets can be a source of comfort, companionship, and family for us....
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The Innocent Witnesses: How Domestic Violence Impacts Children Day 7
According to the Child Welfare Information Gateway, child abuse and neglect includes physical abuse, sexual abuse, emotional abuse, and neglect. What might physical signs look like in a child? Unexplained bruises, welts, multiple injuries in various stages of healing. Fractures or lacerations...
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Cyber and Digital Abuse: When Abuse Follows You Through a Screen
What is digital abuse? Digital abuse is when technology is used to harm, threaten, control, stalk, harass, monitor, impersonate, exploit, or intimidate another person. What can it look like? It can be demanding passwords. Checking someone's phone. Reading private messages. Tracking someone's...
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Abuse Doesn't Always Leave Bruises Day 5
We are on day 5 of all things related to domestic abuse and I'm talking about Emotional Abuse. Now, here's something I wish more people understood that, you can be deeply hurt by someone without ever having a bruise. Emotional abuse can involve humiliation, intimidation, threats, manipulation,...
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Sexual Abuse: Consent, Control, and Finding Your Voice
Trigger warning! Before we go any further, I want to say if this subject is difficult for you, you are allowed to step away. You don't have to listen to something that brings up memories you're not ready to sit with. This is a tough one! Sexual abuse can take many forms and it can happen between...
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How Financial Abuse Traps Survivors Day 3
Financial abuse can look like: Control Sabotage Creating dependency Financial abuse is when money, employment, financial resources, or credit information are used to control, exploit, or limit another person. This can happen in any relationship, intimate partners, families, work, or the elderly.…
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Behind the Bruises: Recognizing the Reality of Physical Abuse Day 2
The information found here are based on my own story, opinions and findings. Please seek a licensed attorney or therapist for advice. What does physical abuse look like? I'll take a short dive into examples of physical abuse. Abuse is about the control and power one has over a person or people....
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Breaking the Silence: Starting the Conversation on Day One
October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month. I'll be sharing topics related to abuse for the next 30 days from, "How to leave an abuser", "The first 72 Hours after leaving", "Leaving a paper trail", "What is abuse" and more. If you need help please reach out to shelter near you. You can find...
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What is the difference between domestic abuse and domestic violence?
These are often used interchangeably but what exactly is the difference? In today's episode I'll dive into the differences. If you feel controlled, isolated, demeaned, monitored in your relationship, you may be experiencing domestic abuse. If you’re physically hurt or threatened by a partner…
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Teen Dating Violence
Teen Dating Violence is when teens, usually ages about 12-18, experience dating relationships in which one partner exerts power and control over the other through physical, sexual, emotional, or stalking behavior. If you’re a teen in a relationship where you feel afraid, controlled, watched,...
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Trigger warning- What does Child Abuse look like?
Trigger warning! Child abuse isn’t always the broken bone or bruise you can see, it can be emotional: constant belittling, fear of being touched, withdrawal. It can be mental: nightmares, self-harm, having to grow up too fast. If you were that kid, you are not alone. If you suspect a child is…
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Creating Healthy Boundaries
Boundaries are more than walls they’re the bridges that lead to healthy, respectful love. In this episode, you’ll teach listeners how to recognize their needs, communicate limits clearly, and hold space for. In a relationship, healthy boundaries look like: - Saying no without guilt. - Taking time...
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What are Flags to look out for in a Relationship?
When you start dating someone new, it’s easy to get swept up in the excitement, the butterflies, the late-night conversations, the feeling of being seen. But love isn’t just about sparks. It’s about safety, respect, and how someone treats you when no one’s watching. Today we’re talking about…
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Signs of a Toxic relationship
I am so sorry for the background noise! Not every toxic relationship looks like yelling or chaos. Sometimes, it’s the constant guilt, the gaslighting, or feeling like you’re never enough. Toxic relationships aren’t always loud. If you’re walking on eggshell or waiting for the other shoe to drop....
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When Anger Explodes: Understanding Intermittent Explosive Disorder
I'm talking about Intermittent Explosive Disorder or IED today. .It’s more than just anger. It’s sudden, violent, and can be unpredictable. When it’s used as control, it becomes abuse. I know how confusing that can be — because my ex-husband was diagnosed with IED. He said the medication made him...
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Breaking the Silence
Today we’re talking about safe storytelling, breaking stigma, and how to support voices that deserve to be heard. Because every voice creates change. Silence protects abusers. Speaking out empowers survivors. Every time a survivor shares their truth the cycle of shame starts to break. You don’t...
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Overcoming Guilt and Shame for Leaving
Abuse thrives on shame — but survivors are not to blame. If you’ve ever felt guilty for leaving, or ashamed for what happened, please know those feelings aren’t yours to carry. They come from manipulation and control, not truth. Abusers want survivors to believe it was their fault, but it never...
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The Dangers of Leaving
Leaving doesn’t always mean the danger is over, in fact, the first 72 hours after leaving an abuser can be the most dangerous. This isn't meant to scare you into staying but it is to prepare you for the possibility. When an abuser loses control, their behavior can escalate to, stalking…
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Legal Options for Survivors
Leaving abuse is hard enough. Understanding your legal options shouldn’t have to be. Let's talk about Protective Orders, Custody, and more on today's episode. Links for websites mentioned are below in no particular order. https://www.justice.gov/eoir/list-pro-bono-legal-service-providers...
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What is Reactive Abuse?
Today, I'm diving into an often not understood. Survivors can be pushed to a breaking point to where they think they are the abuser, take the blame, and/or feel crazy! This can look like: The abuser using emotional, mental, and physical abuse until the survivor is pushed to react. I'll share tips...
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Why doesn't she just leave?!
It can be hard to understand why someone would stay in a toxic relationship. I have heard people say: She/he must like it! I don't understand why she/he won't just leave! How stupid is she/he for staying! He/she is so wonderful! Why are they not happy/lying about how "bad" he/she is?! What…
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Finding resources to help a Survivor
Today's episode is about finding resources, shelters, advocacy help no matter what part of the world you are in! Just know that you are not alone and help is available. Reaching out to any of these programs are not a sign of weakness but accessing help is a sign of strength and courage. Support...
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Technology and Safety
Abuse doesn’t stop when screens are involved. *Protect devices, passwords, location sharing, online privacy. *Digital safety equals personal safety. Remember to perform a digital safety check. This could be weekly, monthly or yearly.
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How friends and family can offer support a Survivor
On today's episode I'll dive into how to help a Survivor. If you know someone being abused, how you respond matters. Here are a few tips: Believe them—don’t question or blame. Don’t pressure them to leave; support their choices. Offer resources, not ultimatums. Be a safe, non-judgmental listener....
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Trigger warning- My story of leaving my abuser
Today's episode is a bit about me and how Hope when there was none was created. I do discuss some deep topics in this episode. I am putting a trigger warning on this. If you or someone you know is in an abusive situation and you need help message privately for national contact info for help. Stay...
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Domestic Violence Impact on Children & Families
Domestic violence affects the whole family. You may see emotional and behavioral impact on children. There is the stress of waiting for the other shoe to drop, trust issues, and intergenerational cycles of abuse. This and more in today's episode. If you or someone you know is in an abusive...
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Healing Starts with You: Self-Love After Abuse
After abuse, it’s easy to feel broken, but you are whole and healing. Self-love as a foundation for recovery. Take baby steps and try, journaling, affirmations, or finding a safe community. Beginning the healing journey is one of many steps to reclaiming who you are and establishing boundaries....
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Breaking Free- Tips For Leaving An Abusive Relationship
Leaving an abusive situation takes planning but on the flipside you may not have that time, so what can you do? Grab pen and paper, a comfy chair, and listen in to today's episode! If you or someone you know is in an abusive situation and you need help message privately for national contact info...
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Red Flags and Warnings In A Relationship
What are warning signs should you look for in a relationship? Maybe you think that you are imagining things or just being overdramatic. Knowing and learning to trust yourself is a big part of recognizing healthy relationships. I dive into things to look out for no matter what type of relationship...
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Unseen Wounds: Understanding the Many Faces of Domestic Violence
It's day 2 of Domestic Violence Awareness Month. "Unseen Wounds- A look into the other faces of abuse". Domestic violence isn’t only hitting—it shows up in many forms: 1. Physical abuse 2. Emotional & Psychological Abuse 3. Sexual Abuse 4. Financial/Economic Abuse 5. Digital Abuse 6. Elder Abuse…
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What is Domestic Violence? – Breaking down myths vs facts
October is domestic abuse awareness month and I'll be coming on for the next 31 days to talk about all things related to abuse. In today's episode I'm going to break down common myths and facts of domestic violence. If you or someone you know is in an abusive situation and you need help message...
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Insiders details about upcoming events
I'm diving into news about re-releasing my books, my healing journey, and details about June 20,2026 retreat! Find out about this and more on today's episode. Join me for coffee on June 21st! Details here: https://www.eventbrite.com/e/1378681035089?aff=oddtdtcreator Here is a link to the books I...
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What does healing trauma look like?
What does healing trauma look like? Here are a few things you may experience while going through your healing journey. Have you experienced any of these? Find me here- https://linktr.ee/melindajkunst Find help and info here- National Domestic Violence Hotline- https://www.thehotline.org/ Safe...
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Revelations in healing
I will put on a trigger warning. Not that I was too graphic but just in case. This is a car version podcast and there is no video. I didn't want that distraction while driving. As always, please do something for you on your healing journey today. Whether it is to journal, talk with a friend…
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Safety planning for the holidays for Survivors in an abusive relationship
As a side note, I reference "she" but men can also be survivors in an abusive situation. Apps ideas mentioned here can be found here: https://www.domesticshelters.org/resources/mobile-apps-for-victims-and-survivors If you need to talk feel free to message me privately. After listening into…
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Signs of Financial abuse
What is Financial abuse? It's deeper than you think! It can look like: Giving an allowance to your partner with accountability for all of it. Not allowing your partner to have his/her name on any credit cards, banking, or loans. Not sharing decision making with your partner pertaining to…
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Do you know what Emotional abuse looks like?
I'm digging into Emotional abuse on today's episode! Here's what it can look like: Emotional abuse- The abuser's psychological or mental violence can include anything that impacts the mental health and well being of their partner. Examples- name calling, insults, put downs crazy making, blaming…
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What does Verbal abuse look like in a relationship?
Verbal abuse is the first topic of an 8 part series where I dig deep into what abuse is and the different types. You can find more information here- httls://facebook.com/hopewhentherewasnone Have you ever heard the childhood rhyme, "Sticks and stones, may break my bones, but words can never hurt...
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Let me go... Tips for leaving your abuser
Leaving someone that is toxic in a relationship is hard! The decision is not made lightly or without much thought. This can be between you and a family member or an intimate partner. I mentioned copying documents and here is the list: If you are concerned your partner will notice these are gone...
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Do you know what "Gatekeeping" is in a relationship?
Gatekeeping sounds like some sort of gaming thing, but it can be darker than this. It is where someone is controlling opportunities, power, resources, and who get these. You can see this in any type of relationship, and you are also capable of doing this! Anytime you have monitored someone and...
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Am I imagining the abuse?
Abuse can happen between anyone. Whether this is between you and a family member, friend or intimate partner. Answer me this: Do you make excuses for this persons poor behavior? Do you dread seeing them or feel exhausted with them or after seeing them? Is there always the same excuse for why they...
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Dealing with toxic people in your life
Abusers don't see the world as we do. They see no fault in their behavior. Abusers will tell others that you were the cause of the demise of the break-up. Question your sanity. You may feel: Scared, depressed, confused, and angry The abuser may: Use the legal system against you. Pressure the kids...
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ABOUT THIS SHOW
After leaving a toxic relationship over a decade ago I embraced a journey to share my story and help others that are healing from emotional traumas, learn about self-care, and find empowerment to re-invent themselves. Here you will hear about the journey of courageous Survivors and many experts that share a passion for helping and inspiring others to awaken the beauty of life without abuse.Thanks for tuning in! I hope your day is filled with blessings, magic, and miracles!
HOSTED BY
Melinda Kunst
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Frequently Asked Questions
How many episodes does Hope when there was none have?
Hope when there was none currently has 521 episodes available on PodParley. New episodes are automatically indexed when they're published to the podcast feed.
What is Hope when there was none about?
After leaving a toxic relationship over a decade ago I embraced a journey to share my story and help others that are healing from emotional traumas, learn about self-care, and find empowerment to re-invent themselves. Here you will hear about the journey of courageous Survivors and many experts...
How often does Hope when there was none release new episodes?
Hope when there was none releases new episodes frequently with a large back catalog of 521 episodes. Check the episode list for recent publication dates.
Where can I listen to Hope when there was none?
You can listen to Hope when there was none on PodParley by clicking any episode. We provide an embedded audio player for direct listening, and you can also subscribe via your preferred podcast app using the RSS feed.
Who hosts Hope when there was none?
Hope when there was none is created and hosted by Melinda Kunst.
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