PODCAST · society
Love Inside Out with Adele Testa
by Adele The Coach
What if the way we've been thinking about love is keeping us from actually having it?Whether you're happily partnered, struggling to connect, or somewhere in the messy middle—pull up a chair. Let's figure this out together.Love Inside Out is for anyone who's ever felt like they're performing in their relationship instead of living in it. For people who wonder if compromise has turned into playing small. For those asking: Why was this easier in my twenties?I'm Adele—coach, and curious human. Thank you for joining me in this journey!
Episodes
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Heart Note 13: what a solo trip could reveal about your life
Solo trip is a great opportunity for learning more about your relationship, your life and most importantly yourself. What to expect? What's unwarranted? Everything in this episode.
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Heart Note 12: truth behind solo trip
We often imagine a solo trip as an escape: a few days away, a reset, some peace and quiet. But what happens when nobody around you knows you, needs anything from you, or expects you to be a certain version of yourself? In this final Heart Note of the summer, I explore what travelling alone can...
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Heart Note 11: Sudden break up in summer
The summer breakup almost never comes out of nowhere. It has a start date, usually months earlier, in a November nobody talked about. This Heart Note is about the gap between knowing a relationship is over and finding the words for it: - why the person leaving often turns suddenly, painfully...
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Replay #10: Rage behind love
Ever had a reaction that felt completely out of proportion to what actually happened? A cancelled plan, a short message, one tiny comment and suddenly you're saying things you wish you could take back. In this episode, we’re getting underneath anger and rage: why the people closest to us can...
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Heart Note 10: loneliness in August
How to tackle this complex month? The answer in this episode
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Replay #9: 3 communication secrets
A short yet rich summary of communications gems to steal and apply straight away. Extract from episode 17.
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Heart Note 9: the power of walk & talk in Love
Why your hardest conversations keep dying at the kitchen table and where they come back to life You sat down to talk about it properly. Two chairs, phones down, "we need to talk." And it went nowhere. Then, days later, walking the long way home, the exact same conversation just… comes out. This...
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Replay #8: The secrets of strong couples
Nobody posts the argument in the car park. We only ever see the highlight reel and then wonder why our own love doesn't look like that. This week's Summer Replay pulls back the curtain on the so- called power couple. What's actually holding those decades-long relationships together isn't…
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Heart Note #8: Long distance relationship in summer
Winter is supposed to be the hard part of long distance. So why does summer quietly wreck people even more? The longer evenings, the barbecues, the parks full of couples, the photo where your person looks genuinely happy without you: none of it makes distance easier. It competes for the attention...
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Replay #7: how expectations damage your relationship and dating experience
From episode 13, today we speak about the invisible contract: all the things you expect from love that you never actually said out loud. In this episode I cover the difference between assumptions, standards, and expectations, and why the silence around them is what really damages our…
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Heart Note #7: Visiting the in-laws and what to watch for
Holidays with the in-laws are the narrative of many TV comedies for a reason. We treat the family visit as something to survive and as a chance to assess who we've ended up with. But a family holiday is a mirror, and it gets held up to both of you. This week, I explore what a summer trip to the...
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Replay #6: How do compromise and gratitude overlap in love?
Have you ever talked yourself out of asking for something you needed, because it could be worse? At least he doesn't cheat. At least she's loyal. At least they come home every evening. We call it gratitude. Sometimes it is. And sometimes it's just the most socially acceptable way to stay quiet...
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Heart Note #6: Whose summer are you actually trying to have?
You opened your phone to check one thing and there they were. The single friend "finally having her summer." The couple who make it all look effortless. And you, on a perfectly ordinary evening, somehow feeling behind on both. This week's Heart Note sits with that quiet ache: the two summers…
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Replay #5: self-love and romantic love
If you've ever quietly believed you need to become a fixed, better version of yourself before you're ready for real closeness, this episode is for you. We'll untangle self-love from the things it keeps getting mistaken for, like the spa day, or aspiring to be perfect. Then I'll hand you the tool…
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Heart Note#5:the picture I didn't take
It was my birthday week. Golden light, my hometown beach, my partner and my child beside me and when the phone came up, I found a reason to leave. Because that isn't the body I wanted back after the pregnancy, and I didn't want it standing there forever. I protected myself from the picture. And I...
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Replay #4: how to find your person
Are you single and wondering if love will ever find you? Or are you dating and unsure if this is the right person? This episode is for anyone navigating the messy, confusing world of relationships and choice. I explore three powerful ideas that can transform how you approach dating: Know yourself...
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Heart Note #4: Why everyone's on the dating apps in summer
It starts with a quiet Sunday evening. The sun is still up, everyone else seems to be out living their best summer, and suddenly you are downloading the dating app you swore you deleted for good. In this Summer Heart Note, we look at what that ache may really be: the wish to feel wanted, the need...
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Replay #3: why fight lingers?
Most of us think the fight is the damage, but the real damage usually happens after, in the silence nobody teaches us how to handle. This week's Sunday Heart Note was about the careful quiet that shows up on holiday. So I'm bringing back one of my favourite episodes on a different silence…
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Heart Note #3: when the couple holiday isn't working
A holiday is basically a relationship stress test in a sunhat. Take away the work, the routine, the separate friends, the rooms you can escape to; and it's just the two of us, sharing a bathroom, a bed, and every single decision about where to go and what to eat. That's exactly where the friction...
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Replay #2: Are you where you want to be in love?
Sunday's Heart Note left us with an idea: wedding-grief isn't a wound, it's a compass, pointing at something you still want. Today's replay picks up that needle and puts it on the table. This is the Episode 3 extract: are you where you want to be in love? We will try to explore the complex...
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Heart Note #2: The wedding invite that hit differently
You can be genuinely happy for the groom and bride, and still go home feeling sad. Those two things co-exist at the same time when you are in a challenging spot in your love life. In this Summer Heart Note, we explore the quiet feeling that sometimes follows weddings, engagement announcements…
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Replay # 1: Juggling LOVE and LIFE
What if the argument is not really about the dishes, the bins or the unanswered text? Sometimes the relationship is not the problem. Life is. Work pressure, exhaustion, children, ageing parents, money, commuting and the mental load can quietly change how we speak, listen and react to each other.…
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Heart Note #1: the version of You that only appears on holiday
Have you ever noticed that a different version of you seems to appear a few days into a holiday? Your body softens. You laugh more easily. You become more curious, more spontaneous and more open to the person beside you. Then you come home—and that version of you seems to disappear almost...
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25. Sorry is a word. Change is a practice
Six sorries in two minutes — and the argument only got worse. If you've ever said "sorry" just to make the discomfort stop… if you've ever been handed an apology that left you feeling more unseen, not less… if you're quietly waiting for an "I'm sorry" that never seems to arrive — this one is for...
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24. The slow fade: when someone leaves without ever saying goodbye
I once had someone fade on me so gradually that I didn't see it happening. He dressed the distance up as a busy season — a big project, a phase, nothing to worry about. By the time I understood what was going on, I'd already mentally planned our second anniversary. Fifteen years later I can still...
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23. Moving for love without losing yourself
Ten years ago, I packed up the life I'd taken 25 years to build and moved to a different country for one person. That person was — and is — worth it. But moving for love is not the romantic plot point it gets sold as. It's a slow, structural decision that touches everything: your friendships…
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22. The four wounds of dysfunctional love - and the secret of healing
Why do you push away the people who are genuinely good for you — and feel strangely at home with the ones who aren't? If steady, kind love feels boring, suspicious, even suffocating… if a caring partner has ever made you think "this is too good to be true"… if you keep choosing chaos and calling…
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21. How to strengthen your relationship
We've all been sold that fixing our relationship takes a weekend retreat, a couples therapist, or a three-hour conversation at midnight that leaves both parties both wrung out and staring at the ceiling. It doesn't. In this episode, I'm giving you part one of my coaching framework — three small,...
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20. Retroactive jealousy: the ghost in your relationship
Your partner's ex. The one you've never met but can't stop thinking about. That's the ghost in your relationship — and in this episode, we're talking about why someone who is no longer part of the story has more power over your peace of mind than the person sleeping next to you. Today we focus on...
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19. Be careful who you talk to about your Love life
This episode is for anyone who's ever left a coffee, a dinner, or a group chat feeling quietly worse about their relationship — without being able to say exactly why. For anyone who's compared their love life to a friend's highlight reel and come up short. For anyone who vents to the same person...
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18. The imaginary race & FOMO in love: why you're comparing your love life to a timeline that doesn't exist
You're not behind. You're scrolling and play a lose-lose game with endless comparisons. Nobody tells you this, so I will: the most damaging thing you can do in love is measure your real life against someone else's highlight reel. That knot in your stomach when a friend gets engaged. That restless...
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17. Three communication secrets no one told you before
This episode is for anyone who's ever felt stuck in the same argument, said something they didn't mean, or walked out of a conversation wondering how it went sideways so fast. No jargon. No "use I-statements." Just three things happening beneath the surface of your love life that most of us were...
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16.The gated bridge: how to protect your peace at family gatherings
You know that moment at a family gathering when someone asks about your love life, your choices or your body and your chest tightens? This episode is your preparation. Easter is close. You'll want this before you walk through that door. In this episode of Love Inside Out, I'm giving you the gated...
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15. Why you shouldn't make love decision when life has shaken you
Making a big decision about your love life when everything is falling apart is like grocery shopping when you're starving. You grab whatever's closest. You don't read the label. You just want the empty feeling to stop. That's not clarity — that's compensation. This episode might save you from the...
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14. What primary school kids know about Love -that most adults have forgotten
Last Sunday, I spotted a poster on a classroom wall in a primary school. Five rules. Handwritten in coloured marker. For children aged six. And I stood there thinking — if adults of my generation learnt and applied these five rules in their romantic relationships, half the heartbreak out there...
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13. The invisible contract: what we expect from love
You've never sat someone down and handed them a list of your assumptions and expectations for how to love you. But you have that list. And when someone breaks a rule they were never told about — it feels like betrayal. If this hit close home, DM @adele_thecoach Love Inside Out is back with an...
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12. Why we rage at the people we love
Have you ever lost your temper with someone you love and barely recognised yourself afterwards? Not just frustrated — properly gone. The message you fired off with shaking hands. Or the silence you went into on purpose, because you knew it would cut deeper than anything you could say. This week…
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11. How to recover - and actually grow - after an argument
The argument is over. The voices have stopped. So why does the silence feel heavier than the shouting did? If your relationship feels weird after a fight — even when the argument is over — listen to this episode. That uncomfortable space — where you're in the same house, doing normal things, but...
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10. Overthinking in relationships & dating: Why your brain won't let you love in peace
You replayed the conversation. You analysed the text. You stayed up at 2AM building an argument about something that hasn't happened yet. And now your stomach hurts. This episode unpacks why overthinking takes over in relationships and dating — and what's actually going on underneath it. We…
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9. How to recognise your person: a dating framework for singles
If you're single, chances are you've been hurt. You've lost trust — not just in love, but in yourself. You tolerated things you shouldn't have. You stayed too long. You ignored the signs.This episode is your reset. I share a framework she's developed through years of working with clients and my…
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8. The Power Couple Myth- everyone wants to be the Obamas (but no one wants to do the work)
You scroll past a photo of the Obamas and think: that. I want that. The look. The respect. The decades-deep love that still lights up a room. But here's what we skip past — the therapy sessions, the 2am conversations that resolved nothing, the mornings where someone woke up annoyed for no good...
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7. The blurry line between Gratitude and Compromise
Have you ever swallowed something that hurt you and immediately told yourself "it could be worse"? Have you ever talked yourself out of a need because "at least they don't do X"? That's not gratitude. That's self-abandonment with a positive spin. In this episode, we explore the blurry line…
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6. The Performance Trap: Stop trying to earn love!
Why do we perform in our most intimate relationships? This episode unpacks where the belief that love must be earned comes from—and how to finally step off the treadmill. In this episode, we explore The Performance Trap: that exhausting pattern of monitoring yourself, proving your worth, and...
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5. How life, work, and juggling impact your love life—and what to do about it
New year, new pressure to fix everything—including your relationship. But what if the real problem isn't the argument about who forgot to defrost the chicken? It's the pattern underneath. This episode gets practical. We talk about stress signatures, the myth of quality time, and why most...
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4. Self-Love and Romantic Love — where they meet and where they differ
You choose the other person, and a small part of you disappears. You choose yourself, and the guilt creeps in. Some nights, loving yourself and loving someone else feel like they're pulling you in opposite directions. And underneath it all, that quiet sentence you've been carrying for years —…
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3. Are you where you want to be in Love?
When most of us think about love, we're not really thinking about what we need. We're thinking about society's script and timeline. So when I ask, "Are you where you want to be in love?"—I'm not asking whether you've ticked the right boxes. I'm asking something deeper. Do you feel fulfilled? Do…
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2. Family Dynamics and Your Love Life: When the Past Shows Up at Holidays
Dreading those awkward questions at the dinner table? Whether you're bringing a partner home, navigating the holidays single, or stuck in situationship limbo—this episode is your survival guide. We explore:→ Why family gatherings trigger old patterns→ The loyalty bind when partner meets family→…
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1. Love Storytelling: The Lies We Tell Ourselves About Love
What if your beliefs about love are actually keeping you from having it? We all carry stories about what relationships should look like—from romantic movies, our parents' marriage, or that person who broke our heart years ago. These love narratives are not always true. This episode unpacks the…
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ABOUT THIS SHOW
What if the way we've been thinking about love is keeping us from actually having it?Whether you're happily partnered, struggling to connect, or somewhere in the messy middle—pull up a chair. Let's figure this out together.Love Inside Out is for anyone who's ever felt like they're performing in their relationship instead of living in it. For people who wonder if compromise has turned into playing small. For those asking: Why was this easier in my twenties?I'm Adele—coach, and curious human. Thank you for joining me in this journey!
HOSTED BY
Adele The Coach
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Frequently Asked Questions
How many episodes does Love Inside Out with Adele Testa have?
Love Inside Out with Adele Testa currently has 48 episodes available on PodParley. New episodes are automatically indexed when they're published to the podcast feed.
What is Love Inside Out with Adele Testa about?
What if the way we've been thinking about love is keeping us from actually having it?Whether you're happily partnered, struggling to connect, or somewhere in the messy middle—pull up a chair. Let's figure this out together.Love Inside Out is for anyone who's ever felt like they're performing in...
How often does Love Inside Out with Adele Testa release new episodes?
Love Inside Out with Adele Testa has 48 episodes. Check the episode list to see recent publication dates and frequency.
Where can I listen to Love Inside Out with Adele Testa?
You can listen to Love Inside Out with Adele Testa on PodParley by clicking any episode. We provide an embedded audio player for direct listening, and you can also subscribe via your preferred podcast app using the RSS feed.
Who hosts Love Inside Out with Adele Testa?
Love Inside Out with Adele Testa is created and hosted by Adele The Coach.
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