PLAYING-IT-SAFE

You're not avoiding the conversation. You're avoiding how it will feel to have it.If you've ever reorganized your inbox instead of making the difficult call or started researching instead of starting the thing, this episode is for you.This episode unpacks experiential avoidance: the mechanism underneath every playing-it-safe behavior.What you will learn:What experiential avoidance actually is, in plain language, no jargon, and why it's the engine behind ALL playing-it-safe behaviors including procrastination, overthinking, perfectionism, and people-pleasing.Why your avoidance is intelligent and well-intentioned, and what it's costing you anyway.What psychological research tells us about how experiential avoidance predicts psychological suffering across every population studied.Willingness, and why it is NOT positive thinking, spiritual bypass, or "just feeling your feelings."Resources mentioned:Playing-it-safe questionnaire: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-questionnaire/ACT Beyond Perfectionism (online course): https://courses.thisisdoctorz.com/act-beyond-perfectionismACT for Indecisiveness (online course): https://courses.thisisdoctorz.com/how-to-shift-from-indecisiveness-into-actionValues-Based Life Audit (free resource): https://proud-snow-5694.ck.page/d2a5e77ba3ACT Coaching at East Bay Behavior Therapy Center: https://eastbaybehaviortherapycenter.com/act-coaching/About Dr. Z:Dr. Patricia Zurita Ona (Dr. Z) is a licensed psychologist, author of eight books, and TEDx speaker who has spent over 18 years helping overthinkers and overachievers stop letting anxiety make their decisions. She is the founder of East Bay Behavior Therapy Center in Walnut Creek, California, and the host of the Playing It Safe podcast. Her TEDx talk "Stop Playing It Safe and Start Living" has over 266,000 views.If this episode helped you recognize one playing-it-safe move in your own life, a review on Apple Podcasts means everything to me. I read every single one._______STOP LETTING ANXIETY MAKE YOUR DECISIONSWHO AM I?My name is Patricia E. Zurita Ona, but my clients call me Dr. Z.I’m a psychologist, a passionate behaviorist, and a person that loves to make behavioral science accessible for day-to-day life. I specialize in Acceptance and Commitment skills (ACT), a form of Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT).I have significant experience – over 18 years – working with individuals dealing with anxiety-based struggles such as perfectionism, procrastination, chronic indecision, phobias, OCD, panic, worry, and any other anxiety-related difficulties.I've published books on ACT, given a TEDx talk with 260K+ views, founded East Bay Behavior Therapy Center, and spent two decades proving one thing: Your anxiety doesn't need fixing. It needs listening to. Because most of the time, anxiety is just trying to keep you safe, the problem is when "safe" becomes "stuck." And once you know the difference, everything changes.My website is packed with resources, courses and content that will help you break free from those "playing-it-safe" moves and make the most out of your life!GET ACT SKILLS IN YOUR INBOX:Sign up to my newsletter to get actionable skills into your inbox! https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-newsletter/HERE IS WHERE TO START1. TAKE THE PLAYING-IT-SAFE QUESTIONNAIRE: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-questionnaire/2. ONLINE COURSES: https://courses.thisisdoctorz.com/3. PODCAST: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-podcast/4. BOOKS: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/books/5. BLOG: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-blog/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

You've been calling it acceptance. But, if your world has gotten quieter, smaller, and safer since the painful thing happened, that might be resignation.In this episode, Dr. Z tackles one of the most confusing distinctions in ACT: the difference between acceptance and resignation.If you've been thinking repetitively about a past loss, failure, or regret (going back over it, telling yourself you're learning from it, then finding yourself in the exact same loop tomorrow), this episode is for you.You'll leave with a clear understanding of what acceptance actually is (and is not), and a concrete four-step practice you can use today.What you will learn:The exact difference between acceptance and resignation — and why they feel the same from the insideWhat the war against your anxiety is actually costing you — and what changes when you stop fighting itWhy you don't have to wait for the pain to go away before taking values-based actionResources:Playing-It-Safe Questionnaire (free, 5 minutes): https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-questionnaire/ACT Workbook for the Anxious Procrastinator: https://a.co/d/gAR36j9Acceptance and Commitment Skills for Perfectionism and High-Achieving Behaviors: https://amzn.to/3xT7j0TFree Audio Guide on ACT for High-Achieving Behaviors: https://proud-snow-5694.ck.page/73a2c1b566Dr. Patricia Zurita Ona (Dr. Z) is a licensed psychologist, author of eight books, and TEDx speaker who has spent over 18 years helping overthinkers and overachievers stop letting anxiety make their decisions. She is the founder of East Bay Behavior Therapy Center in Walnut Creek, California, and the host of the Playing-It-Safe podcast. Her TEDx talk "Stop Playing It Safe and Start Living" has over 266,000 views.If this episode helped you recognize one playing-it-safe move in your own life, a review on Apple Podcasts means everything to me. I read every single one._______STOP LETTING ANXIETY MAKE YOUR DECISIONSWHO AM I?My name is Patricia E. Zurita Ona, but my clients call me Dr. Z.I’m a psychologist, a passionate behaviorist, and a person that loves to make behavioral science accessible for day-to-day life. I specialize in Acceptance and Commitment skills (ACT), a form of Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT).I have significant experience – over 18 years – working with individuals dealing with anxiety-based struggles such as perfectionism, procrastination, chronic indecision, phobias, OCD, panic, worry, and any other anxiety-related difficulties.I've published books on ACT, given a TEDx talk with 260K+ views, founded East Bay Behavior Therapy Center, and spent two decades proving one thing: Your anxiety doesn't need fixing. It needs listening to. Because most of the time, anxiety is just trying to keep you safe, the problem is when "safe" becomes "stuck." And once you know the difference, everything changes.My website is packed with resources, courses and content that will help you break free from those "playing-it-safe" moves and make the most out of your life!GET ACT SKILLS IN YOUR INBOX:Sign up to my newsletter to get actionable skills into your inbox! https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-newsletter/HERE IS WHERE TO START1. TAKE THE PLAYING-IT-SAFE QUESTIONNAIRE: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-questionnaire/2. ONLINE COURSES: https://courses.thisisdoctorz.com/3. PODCAST: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-podcast/4. BOOKS: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/books/5. BLOG: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-blog/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

You're not missing information. You're missing a different question.This episode is for anyone sitting inside an impossible decision, one where every option feels wrong, the pros-and-cons list has been rewritten twelve times, you've talked to everyone you trust, and you still can't move.Your mind wasn't built for situations where both choices cost you something you care about. More deliberation isn't the answer, it's the trap. And there is a question that cuts through all of it. Not "what's the right choice?", but "what do I want to stand for here?"Resources mentioned:Values-Based Review (free): https://proud-snow-5694.ck.page/d2a5e77ba3ACT for Indecisiveness course: https://courses.thisisdoctorz.com/how-to-shift-from-indecisiveness-into-actionPlaying-It-Safe Questionnaire (free): https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-questionnaire/Dr. Patricia Zurita Ona (Dr. Z) is a licensed psychologist, author of eight books, and TEDx speaker who has spent over 18 years helping overthinkers and overachievers stop letting anxiety make their decisions. She is the founder of East Bay Behavior Therapy Center in Walnut Creek, California, and the host of the Playing It Safe podcast. Her TEDx talk "Stop Playing It Safe and Start Living" has over 266,000 views.If this episode helped you recognize one playing-it-safe move in your own life, a review on Apple Podcasts means everything to me. I read every single one._______STOP LETTING ANXIETY MAKE YOUR DECISIONSGET ACT SKILLS IN YOUR INBOX:Sign up to my newsletter to get actionable skills into your inbox! https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-newsletter/HERE IS WHERE TO START:1. TAKE THE PLAYING-IT-SAFE QUESTIONNAIRE: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-questionnaire/2. ONLINE COURSES: https://courses.thisisdoctorz.com/3. PODCAST: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-podcast/4. BOOKS: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/books/5. BLOG: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-blog/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

She was at every party. But she was never fully in the room.Safety crutches, the subtle playing-it-safe moves that keep anxiety temporarily quiet, look nothing like avoidance. You're showing up. You're present. But you're also carrying a shield. And the shield is costing you every moment of real connection you're trying to build.This episode is for anyone who has ever walked into a situation with a plan already in place to feel less exposed — and wondered why the situation still felt so far away.In this episode, you will learn:What safety crutches actually are and why they look like coping but function like avoidanceWhy Paul Salkovskis's research on safety behaviors shows that the relief is borrowed — and what you're borrowing againstWhat research on psychological flexibility reveals about why fighting anxiety makes it louderACT skilsl for dropping subtle safety behaviors, one small moment at a timeWhat your specific safety crutch is almost certainly protecting, and why that thing mattersResources mentioned:Playing-It-Safe Questionnaire: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-questionnaire/About Dr. Z: Dr. Patricia Zurita Ona, Dr. Z., is a licensed psychologist, author of eight books, and TEDx speaker who has spent over 18 years helping overthinkers and overachievers stop letting anxiety make their decisions. She is the founder of East Bay Behavior Therapy Center in Walnut Creek, California, and the host of the Playing It Safe podcast. Her TEDx talk "Stop Playing It Safe and Start Living" has over 265,000 views.If this episode helped you recognize one playing-it-safe move in your own life, a review on Apple Podcasts means everything to me. I read every single one._______STOP LETTING ANXIETY MAKE YOUR DECISIONSGET ACT SKILLS IN YOUR INBOX:Sign up to my newsletter to get actionable skills into your inbox! https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-newsletter/HERE IS WHERE TO START:1. TAKE THE PLAYING-IT-SAFE QUESTIONNAIRE: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-questionnaire/2. ONLINE COURSES: https://courses.thisisdoctorz.com/3. PODCAST: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-podcast/4. BOOKS: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/books/5. BLOG: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-blog/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

She got the answer. Felt better for twelve minutes. Then she asked again.Reassurance-seeking is one of the most common and least-recognized playing-it-safe behaviors. It looks like due diligence. It feels like self-care. And it is quietly tightening the anxiety loop every time you do it.This episode is for anyone who has ever Googled the same question in six different ways, or sent the same question to three different people to see if the answer would finally stick.In this episode, you will learn:Why reassurance feels like relief but functions like a tightening spiralWhat Stanley Rachman's research reveals about why safety behaviors maintain, not reduce, anxietyHow Michel Dugas's intolerance of uncertainty model explains why more information is never enoughACT skills for interrupting the checking loop without white-knuckling through itThe values-based reason the checking is worth interruptingResources mentioned:Playing-It-Safe Questionnaire: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-questionnaire/About Dr. Z: Dr. Patricia Zurita Ona, Dr. Z., is a licensed psychologist, author of eight books, and TEDx speaker who has spent over 18 years helping overthinkers and overachievers stop letting anxiety make their decisions. She is the founder of East Bay Behavior Therapy Center in Walnut Creek, California, and the host of the Playing It Safe podcast. Her TEDx talk "Stop Playing It Safe and Start Living" has over 265,000 views.If this episode helped you recognize one playing-it-safe move in your own life, a review on Apple Podcasts means everything to me. I read every single one._______STOP LETTING ANXIETY MAKE YOUR DECISIONSGET ACT SKILLS IN YOUR INBOX:Sign up to my newsletter to get actionable skills into your inbox! https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-newsletter/HERE IS WHERE TO START:1. TAKE THE PLAYING-IT-SAFE QUESTIONNAIRE: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-questionnaire/2. ONLINE COURSES: https://courses.thisisdoctorz.com/3. PODCAST: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-podcast/4. BOOKS: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/books/5. BLOG: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-blog/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The presentation went well. For two days after, he couldn't stop replaying the four seconds when he lost his train of thought.His mind decided those four seconds were the truth about the whole thing, not the standing ovation. The four seconds.That's overvaluing and overidentifying with your thoughts, which is playing-it-safe behavior #7.In Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), we call it cognitive fusion, and research shows that the harder you try to push the thought away, the louder it comes back.The skill isn't changing the thought. It's changing your relationship to it._______STOP LETTING ANXIETY MAKE YOUR DECISIONSWHO AM I?My name is Patricia E. Zurita Ona, but my clients call me Dr. Z.I’m a psychologist, a passionate behaviorist, and a person that loves to make behavioral science accessible for day-to-day life. I specialize in Acceptance and Commitment skills (ACT), a form of Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT).I have significant experience – over 18 years – working with individuals dealing with anxiety-based struggles such as perfectionism, procrastination, chronic indecision, phobias, OCD, panic, worry, and any other anxiety-related difficulties.I've published books on ACT, given a TEDx talk with 260K+ views, founded East Bay Behavior Therapy Center, and spent two decades proving one thing: Your anxiety doesn't need fixing. It needs listening to. Because most of the time, anxiety is just trying to keep you safe, the problem is when "safe" becomes "stuck." And once you know the difference, everything changes.My website is packed with resources, courses and content that will help you break free from those "playing-it-safe" moves and make the most out of your life!GET ACT SKILLS IN YOUR INBOX:Sign up to my newsletter to get actionable skills into your inbox! https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-newsletter/HERE IS WHERE TO START:1. TAKE THE PLAYING-IT-SAFE QUESTIONNAIRE: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-questionnaire/2. ONLINE COURSES: https://courses.thisisdoctorz.com/3. PODCAST: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-podcast/4. BOOKS: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/books/5. BLOG: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-blog/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

After a distraction, it takes an average of 23 minutes to return to the original task.Not because you're weak. Because your environment was built using the same behavioral principles as slot machines to pull your attention away from what matters.Final episode of the Anxious Procrastinator series, the neuroscience of focus and what committed action actually looks like when you bring everything together.What would you do this week if you weren't playing-it-safe?_______STOP LETTING ANXIETY MAKE YOUR DECISIONSWHO AM I?My name is Patricia E. Zurita Ona, but my clients call me Dr. Z.I’m a psychologist, a passionate behaviorist, and a person that loves to make behavioral science accessible for day-to-day life. I specialize in Acceptance and Commitment skills (ACT), a form of Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT).I have significant experience – over 18 years – working with individuals dealing with anxiety-based struggles such as perfectionism, procrastination, chronic indecision, phobias, OCD, panic, worry, and any other anxiety-related difficulties.I've published books on ACT, given a TEDx talk with 260K+ views, founded East Bay Behavior Therapy Center, and spent two decades proving one thing: Your anxiety doesn't need fixing. It needs listening to. Because most of the time, anxiety is just trying to keep you safe, the problem is when "safe" becomes "stuck." And once you know the difference, everything changes.My website is packed with resources, courses and content that will help you break free from those "playing-it-safe" moves and make the most out of your life!GET ACT SKILLS IN YOUR INBOX:Sign up to my newsletter to get actionable skills into your inbox! https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-newsletter/HERE IS WHERE TO START:1. TAKE THE PLAYING-IT-SAFE QUESTIONNAIRE: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-questionnaire/2. ONLINE COURSES: https://courses.thisisdoctorz.com/3. PODCAST: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-podcast/4. BOOKS: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/books/5. BLOG: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-blog/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Accurately estimating how hard something will be requires sitting with the discomfort of its difficulty. And your mind would rather not.In this new episode of Playing-It-Safe we discussed the research on time, flow states, and four principles that actually work for overthinkers and overachievers.What would you do this week if you weren't playing-it-safe?_______STOP LETTING ANXIETY MAKE YOUR DECISIONSWHO AM I?My name is Patricia E. Zurita Ona, but my clients call me Dr. Z.I’m a psychologist, a passionate behaviorist, and a person that loves to make behavioral science accessible for day-to-day life. I specialize in Acceptance and Commitment skills (ACT), a form of Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT).I have significant experience – over 18 years – working with individuals dealing with anxiety-based struggles such as perfectionism, procrastination, chronic indecision, phobias, OCD, panic, worry, and any other anxiety-related difficulties.I've published books on ACT, given a TEDx talk with 260K+ views, founded East Bay Behavior Therapy Center, and spent two decades proving one thing: Your anxiety doesn't need fixing. It needs listening to. Because most of the time, anxiety is just trying to keep you safe, the problem is when "safe" becomes "stuck." And once you know the difference, everything changes.My website is packed with resources, courses and content that will help you break free from those "playing-it-safe" moves and make the most out of your life!GET ACT SKILLS IN YOUR INBOX:Sign up to my newsletter to get actionable skills into your inbox! https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-newsletter/HERE IS WHERE TO START:1. TAKE THE PLAYING-IT-SAFE QUESTIONNAIRE: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-questionnaire/2. ONLINE COURSES: https://courses.thisisdoctorz.com/3. PODCAST: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-podcast/4. BOOKS: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/books/5. BLOG: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-blog/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

"I want to finish this project" sounds like moving toward something. But, underneath it is often "I'm terrified of what it means if I don't." New episode of Playing-It-Safe: the three goal traps and the research on what actually produces commitment, satisfaction, and follow-through.What would you do this week if you weren't playing-it-safe?_______STOP LETTING ANXIETY MAKE YOUR DECISIONSWHO AM I?My name is Patricia E. Zurita Ona, but my clients call me Dr. Z.I’m a psychologist, a passionate behaviorist, and a person that loves to make behavioral science accessible for day-to-day life. I specialize in Acceptance and Commitment skills (ACT), a form of Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT).I have significant experience – over 18 years – working with individuals dealing with anxiety-based struggles such as perfectionism, procrastination, chronic indecision, phobias, OCD, panic, worry, and any other anxiety-related difficulties.I've published books on ACT, given a TEDx talk with 260K+ views, founded East Bay Behavior Therapy Center, and spent two decades proving one thing: Your anxiety doesn't need fixing. It needs listening to. Because most of the time, anxiety is just trying to keep you safe, the problem is when "safe" becomes "stuck." And once you know the difference, everything changes.My website is packed with resources, courses and content that will help you break free from those "playing-it-safe" moves and make the most out of your life!GET ACT SKILLS IN YOUR INBOX:Sign up to my newsletter to get actionable skills into your inbox! https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-newsletter/HERE IS WHERE TO START:1. TAKE THE PLAYING-IT-SAFE QUESTIONNAIRE: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-questionnaire/2. ONLINE COURSES: https://courses.thisisdoctorz.com/3. PODCAST: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-podcast/4. BOOKS: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/books/5. BLOG: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-blog/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Your mind has a highly convincing list of reasons why right now isn’t the right time.In this episode, we unpack why those excuses sound so incredibly rational, how your brain uses them to keep you safe (and stuck), and the one behavioral shift that actually moves you forward._______STOP LETTING ANXIETY MAKE YOUR DECISIONSWHO AM I?My name is Patricia E. Zurita Ona, but my clients call me Dr. Z.I’m a psychologist, a passionate behaviorist, and a person that loves to make behavioral science accessible for day-to-day life. I specialize in Acceptance and Commitment skills (ACT), a form of Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT).I have significant experience – over 18 years – working with individuals dealing with anxiety-based struggles such as perfectionism, procrastination, chronic indecision, phobias, OCD, panic, worry, and any other anxiety-related difficulties.I've published books on ACT, given a TEDx talk with 260K+ views, founded East Bay Behavior Therapy Center, and spent two decades proving one thing: Your anxiety doesn't need fixing. It needs listening to. Because most of the time, anxiety is just trying to keep you safe, the problem is when "safe" becomes "stuck." And once you know the difference, everything changes.My website is packed with resources, courses and content that will help you break free from those "playing-it-safe" moves and make the most out of your life!GET ACT SKILLS IN YOUR INBOX:Sign up to my newsletter to get actionable skills into your inbox! https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-newsletter/HERE IS WHERE TO START:1. TAKE THE PLAYING-IT-SAFE QUESTIONNAIRE: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-questionnaire/2. ONLINE COURSES: https://courses.thisisdoctorz.com/3. PODCAST: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-podcast/4. BOOKS: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/books/5. BLOG: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-blog/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Most high achievers believe being hard on themselves is what keeps them sharp.The research disagrees.People with higher self-compassion show greater motivation after failure, not less. And they procrastinate significantly less.New episode of the Playing-It-Safe Podcast: why the second arrow might be the thing most keeping you stuck.What would you do this week if you weren't playing-it-safe?_______STOP LETTING ANXIETY MAKE YOUR DECISIONSWHO AM I?My name is Patricia E. Zurita Ona, but my clients call me Dr. Z.I’m a psychologist, a passionate behaviorist, and a person that loves to make behavioral science accessible for day-to-day life. I specialize in Acceptance and Commitment skills (ACT), a form of Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT).I have significant experience – over 18 years – working with individuals dealing with anxiety-based struggles such as perfectionism, procrastination, chronic indecision, phobias, OCD, panic, worry, and any other anxiety-related difficulties.I've published books on ACT, given a TEDx talk with 260K+ views, founded East Bay Behavior Therapy Center, and spent two decades proving one thing: Your anxiety doesn't need fixing. It needs listening to. Because most of the time, anxiety is just trying to keep you safe, the problem is when "safe" becomes "stuck." And once you know the difference, everything changes.My website is packed with resources, courses and content that will help you break free from those "playing-it-safe" moves and make the most out of your life!GET ACT SKILLS IN YOUR INBOX:Sign up to my newsletter to get actionable skills into your inbox! https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-newsletter/HERE IS WHERE TO START:1. TAKE THE PLAYING-IT-SAFE QUESTIONNAIRE: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-questionnaire/2. ONLINE COURSES: https://courses.thisisdoctorz.com/3. PODCAST: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-podcast/4. BOOKS: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/books/5. BLOG: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-blog/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

External achievements account for only about 10% of lasting happiness.The 40% within your control? How you spend your time and what meaning you attach to it.New episode of the Playing-It-Safe Podcast: the research on values, meaning, and the birthday party exercise that shows you exactly where the gap is.What would you do this week if you weren't playing-it-safe?_______STOP LETTING ANXIETY MAKE YOUR DECISIONSWHO AM I?My name is Patricia E. Zurita Ona, but my clients call me Dr. Z.I’m a psychologist, a passionate behaviorist, and a person that loves to make behavioral science accessible for day-to-day life. I specialize in Acceptance and Commitment skills (ACT), a form of Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT).I have significant experience – over 18 years – working with individuals dealing with anxiety-based struggles such as perfectionism, procrastination, chronic indecision, phobias, OCD, panic, worry, and any other anxiety-related difficulties.I've published books on ACT, given a TEDx talk with 260K+ views, founded East Bay Behavior Therapy Center, and spent two decades proving one thing: Your anxiety doesn't need fixing. It needs listening to. Because most of the time, anxiety is just trying to keep you safe, the problem is when "safe" becomes "stuck." And once you know the difference, everything changes.My website is packed with resources, courses and content that will help you break free from those "playing-it-safe" moves and make the most out of your life!GET ACT SKILLS IN YOUR INBOX:Sign up to my newsletter to get actionable skills into your inbox! https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-newsletter/HERE IS WHERE TO START:1. TAKE THE PLAYING-IT-SAFE QUESTIONNAIRE: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-questionnaire/2. ONLINE COURSES: https://courses.thisisdoctorz.com/3. PODCAST: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-podcast/4. BOOKS: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/books/5. BLOG: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-blog/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Your mind isn't lazy!Researchers found that people who chronically procrastinate are more threat-sensitive. Not less motivated.What would you do this week if you weren't playing it safe?RESOURCES:Values-based Review: Life Audit_______STOP LETTING ANXIETY MAKE YOUR DECISIONSWHO AM I?My name is Patricia E. Zurita Ona, but my clients call me Dr. Z.I’m a psychologist, a passionate behaviorist, and a person that loves to make behavioral science accessible for day-to-day life. I specialize in Acceptance and Commitment skills (ACT), a form of Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT).I have significant experience – over 18 years – working with individuals dealing with anxiety-based struggles such as perfectionism, procrastination, chronic indecision, phobias, OCD, panic, worry, and any other anxiety-related difficulties.I've published books on ACT, given a TEDx talk with 260K+ views, founded East Bay Behavior Therapy Center, and spent two decades proving one thing: Your anxiety doesn't need fixing. It needs listening to. Because most of the time, anxiety is just trying to keep you safe, the problem is when "safe" becomes "stuck." And once you know the difference, everything changes.My website is packed with resources, courses and content that will help you break free from those "playing-it-safe" moves and make the most out of your life!GET ACT SKILLS IN YOUR INBOX:Sign up to my newsletter to get actionable skills into your inbox! https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-newsletter/HERE IS WHERE TO START:1. TAKE THE PLAYING-IT-SAFE QUESTIONNAIRE: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-questionnaire/2. ONLINE COURSES: https://courses.thisisdoctorz.com/3. PODCAST: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-podcast/4. BOOKS: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/books/5. BLOG: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-blog/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode, Dr. Z. dives deep into the world of procrastination, debunking common myths, exploring the different types of procrastinators, and unpacking the psychological processes that fuel our tendency to delay.Debunking the Myths of ProcrastinationMany of us have internalized misconceptions about procrastination. Dr. Z. tackles these head-on, revealing that procrastination is rarely about laziness or poor time management. Instead, it often stems from deeper psychological factors. For example, the myth that people “work better under pressure” is just that—a myth. Research shows that last-minute work rarely leads to better results and often increases stress. Similarly, blaming procrastination on a lack of willpower oversimplifies the issue; it’s more about understanding and addressing the underlying factors that drive problematic procrastination.Six Reflective Questions to Break the CycleDr. Z. shares six reflective questions to unpack the psychological roots of procrastinating behaviors.(*) Show notes and resources of this episode(*) Receive free weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe(*) Figure out your playing-it-safe profile in 5 minutes and identify the key thinking strategies that keep you living in your head(*) Learn ACT skills for anxious achievers by taking Dr. Z. ACT courses Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Today, I’m sharing with you a conversation with Dr. Mitchell Greene, Ph.D. In our chat, we dive deep into the psychology of goal-setting, attachment to goals, over-identification with one area of our life, peak performance, and mental resilience.When you’re taking a big exam, dealing with a work project, or participating in an important match, how do you manage your worries about your performance and your desire to perform to the best of your abilities?Are you supportive of yourself without adding pressure into your plate?How do you think of yourself without all the stuff you do in your day-to-day life?While having goals is essential for your performance and motivation, they are just one piece of the puzzle. You also need to manage your mental chatter to perform at your best when it matters to you!You will hear Mitchell and I sharing our take on Roger Federer, Rick Barry, Kobe Bryant, Andre Agassi, and other professional athletes’ approach to their performance, expectations, and goal-setting.Whether you’re dealing with high-stakes sports scenarios or everyday life challenges, the principles to set your goals, how you relate to them, and how you approach your mental chatter remain the same.You can find meaning and joy by making small tweaks and savoring the good along the way!Hope you enjoy this episode!Key TakeawaysUnderstanding fear-based reactionsSetting goals for improved performanceManaging mind chatter in sportsThe role of mental skills in athletic successBalancing life and sport: Lessons from Roger Federer and Andre AgassiThe importance of parental support in youth sportsShow notes01:01 The Importance of Goal Setting01:08 The Problem with Tunnel Vision 01:44 Importance of Outcome Goals 02:45 The Role of Action Goals03:43 Goal setting and mental chatter04:34 Managing Chatter for Success 05:30 Developing a New Relationship with Your Mind 06:01 Lessons from Roger Federer06:43 Advice for Struggling Athletes 07:22 Mental Game of Professional Athletes 08:58 Perfectionism in Sports11:42 Small Increments of Improvement13:15 Leadership Challenges in Sports 13:55 Balancing Life and Sport 16:10 The Impact of Injuries on a Person’s Mindset16:52 Parental Influence on Young Athletes 18:02 Coaching the Coaches(*) Show notes and resources of this episode(*) Receive free weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe(*) Figure out your playing-it-safe profile in 5 minutes and identify the key thinking strategies that keep you living in your head(*) Learn ACT skills for anxious achievers by taking Dr. Z. ACT courses Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In part 1 of my conversation with Monica Basco, Ph.D., Exploring the intersection of perfectionism, procrastination, and performance, we discussed the following topics:Perfectionism and high-achieving behaviorsUnderstanding the impact of high goalsThe role of confidence in goal settingThe intersection of perfectionism and procrastinationIn this second part of our conversation, Monica kindly shared her transition from academia to the White House as an introduction to the focus of this episode: the intersection of perfectionism and imposter phenomenon.Perfectionists set exceptionally high standards for themselves, displaying a relentless drive to achieve what they perceive as flawless outcomes. However, when these standards are not met, it can lead to feelings of failure and inadequacy. Even when they succeed, perfectionists may fear that others will see through their façade, further perpetuating the imposter phenomenon.A highlight of our conversation is the importance of discerning when perfectionistic actions are an asset and when they become a liability.Key TakeawaysPerfectionism and imposter phenomenonExploring imposter phenomenonPerfectionism and self-expectationsOvercoming imposter syndromeThe transition from academia to governmentPerfectionism in different contextsBalancing perfectionism and fear of failureDistinguishing when to turn on and off perfectionistic actionsShow notes with time-stamps00:00 The Intersection of Perfectionism and Imposter Phenomenon05:03 Personal Story: Overcoming Imposter Syndrome10:10 Transition from Academia to the White House16:12 The Role of Perfectionism in Government and Science18:23 Fear of Failure and Perfectionism22:52 How Different Fears Influence Behavior(*) Show notes and resources of this episode(*) Receive free weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe(*) Figure out your playing-it-safe profile in 5 minutes and identify the key thinking strategies that keep you living in your head(*) Learn ACT skills for anxious achievers by taking Dr. Z. ACT courses Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Drop your standards! Let go of your perfectionistic tendencies!If I were paid a dollar every time I heard this message, I would have a large bank account by now.When you’re pursuing a top performance – from athletic to intellectual to artistic ones – it’s fundamental that you distinguish those common principles that improve your performance and your well-being altogether.In this episode, Brad Stulberg and I discussed research-based skills to deal with high-achieving and striving behaviors in a skillful manner and without losing yourself. Key TakeawaysHow to distinguish when perfectionistic actions are working for you or against youThe difference between values-based goals and ego-driven goalsHow to avoid burnout in the information eraHow to manage your proneness to perfectionistic actionsDay-to-day experiences of experiential avoidanceTips to handle the fear of failureHow to figure out what is on the other side of your fearsHow to practice self-compassion when handling our fearsShow notes with time stamps00:31 Understanding Fear-Based Reactions01:02 Overcoming Perfectionism01:36 Interview with Brad Stulberg: High Achieving and Striving Behaviors02:19 Reflecting on Your Life and Overcoming Overthinking03:28 Living According to Your Values04:10 Using a Values-Based Review to Live the Life You Want04:46 Conversation with Brad Stulberg: Balancing Productivity and Wellbeing05:43 Understanding the Double-Edged Sword of Optimization08:44 Dealing with Fear of Failure and Regret17:48 Navigating Ego-Driven Goals and Values-Based Goals24:09 Overcoming Experiential Avoidance(*) Show notes and resources of this episode(*) Receive free weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe(*) Figure out your playing-it-safe profile in 5 minutes and identify the key thinking strategies that keep you living in your head(*) Learn ACT skills for anxious achievers by taking Dr. Z. ACT courses Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Perfectionism isn’t a personality quirk. It’s a pattern of reinforced behaviors that can seep into every aspect of your life.You may set certain standards for yourself, certain rules about how things are supposed to be or how you are supposed to behave; while you may meet those standards for a while, they eventually - and inevitably - fall short. Then, you feel crushed. Then, you criticize yourself. And then, to drown out the negativity, you set new goals, standards, and expectations for yourself. The cycle of ineffective perfectionistic actions repeats and maintains itself.There is nothing wrong with striving to do things right and perfectly - that’s natural when you deeply care about things and what matters to you. And, as you have heard me say before, it’s extremely important that you learn to harness the power of perfectionistic actions without losing yourself. In this podcast episode, I chat with Monica Basco, Ph.D. We discuss specific topics related to perfectionism in detail:(a) A large part of the conversation clarifies how having high standards and being perfectionistic can be both, beneficial and detrimental, and finding the balance between the two is crucial.(b) We also discussed the interplay between perfectionistic behaviors and procrastination as two sides of the same coin.(c) Monica and I highlighted the fact that setting high-goals is productive when one can tolerate failure. However, learning to pursue what matters and learning to let things go - as the right thing to do - is also important.(d) Finally, we discuss ideas for you to conduct a functional analysis, or in other words, we discuss key questions for you to understand your drive to engage in perfectionistic actions (e.g., what is my mind trying to protect me from right now?)Key TakeawaysDiscussing perfectionism and high-achieving behaviorsUnderstanding the impact of high goalsThe role of confidence in goal settingThe intersection of perfectionism and procrastinationShow notes with time-stamps01:00 Understanding Fear and Perfectionism01:31 Dealing with Perfectionism and High-Achieving Behaviors02:35 Cognitive Behavior Therapy and Perfectionism04:14 Setting Goals and Dealing with Failure05:12 Understanding Overachievement and Expectations08:37 Dealing with Rejection and Pursuing Goals20:43 Understanding the Intersection of Perfectionism and Procrastination(*) Show notes and resources of this episode(*) Receive free weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe(*) Figure out your playing-it-safe profile in 5 minutes and identify the key thinking strategies that keep you living in your head(*) Learn ACT skills for anxious achievers by taking Dr. Z. ACT courses Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Today’s episode takes off with discussing fears of driving. This is the starting point to discuss a key process within acceptance commitment therapy: values-based exposures.In this episode, you will learn the principles to approach your fears, worries, and anxieties in a flexible way and in the service of your values.Brian Thompson, Ph.D. and I covered different ACT skills such as defusion, values, willingness and what you can do if you’re getting stuck in conquering your fears or you’re afraid of starting the process of facing your anxieties.Key TakeawaysWhat is willingnessHow to deal with uncertaintyWhat to do when you’re powering through a fearful situationWhat is exposureUnderstanding fear-based reactions and safe behaviorsExploring the concept of exposure in overcoming fearDealing with physical sensations during fearful situationsThe role of acceptance and commitment therapy in overcoming fearUnderstanding the concept of willingness in therapyAddressing fear of uncertainty and unpredictabilityIntroduction to the upcoming book on act-informed exposure for anxietyUnderstanding act and exposureDealing with chronic worryEffective problem solving vs. worryShow notes with time stamps00:31 Understanding Fear-Based Reactions and Safe Behaviors01:00 Exploring Exposure Therapy and Anxiety01:09 Dealing with Physical Sensations During Panic Attacks02:44 Strategies to Manage Anxiety and Fear03:39 Addressing Intrusive Thoughts and Fears04:16 Understanding Acceptance and Commitment Therapy07:33 Exploring Willingness in Therapy14:28 Addressing Fear of Uncertainty17:28 Introduction to ACT-Informed Exposure for Anxiety19:19 Discussing the Book and Its Approach19:44 Recommendations for Approaching the Book19:45 Understanding the Process of Exposure20:38 The Role of Repetition in Exposure21:37 Handling Chronic Worries and Ruminations22:12 Using ACT for Chronic Worry23:11 Writing Imaginal Scripts for Worries26:13 Effective Problem Solving vs. Worry26:50 Distinguishing Between Productive and Unproductive Worry(*) Show notes and resources of this episode(*) Receive free weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe(*) Figure out your playing-it-safe profile in 5 minutes and identify the key thinking strategies that keep you living in your head(*) Learn ACT skills for anxious achievers by taking Dr. Z. ACT courses Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Ever catch yourself engaging in incessant mind chatter in a high-stakes situation? The kind that fills your head with self-doubt, comparisons, and anticipations of failure? You're not alone. We all do it. But what if there was a way to overcome these self-limiting beliefs and embrace life's challenges with confidence? I had a chance to talk to Dr. Mitchell Greene, Ph.D. regarding performance anxiety, managing self-doubt, and comparison thoughts among athletes or overthinkers. If you have been following the podcast, you know by now that by making room for your thoughts, rather than struggling against them, you can redirect your focus towards the present moment and towards what matters. In today’s episode, we discussed other micro-skills to manage mental chatter with curiosity and courage. Key TakeawaysThe pitfalls of positive thinkingManaging mind chatterHow to shift your attention from hypothetical worries to the present momentRedirecting your attention from “what if” to “what is”How to manage lapses in confidenceA useful mindset to perform challenging tasksExploring the concept of positive thinkingUnderstanding mind chatter and its impactStrategies for managing mind chatterApplying mind chatter management in real-life scenarios(*) Show notes and resources of this episode(*) Receive free weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe(*) Figure out your playing-it-safe profile in 5 minutes and identify the key thinking strategies that keep you living in your head(*) Learn ACT skills for anxious achievers by taking Dr. Z. ACT courses Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Picture this scenario: you encounter an ambiguous and uncertain situation, and then, of course, you quickly try to solve it. You anticipate all types of scenarios and try to prepare for each one of them, without realizing you are worrying and consumed with anxiety.Worry is primarily a thought-based process, and that’s what makes it tricky. Unpacking worry thoughts and distinguishing the unhelpful from the helpful ones are crucial.We all worry from time to time, that’s unavoidable. But playing-it-safe by worrying all the time takes a hefty toll on your well-being, happiness, and relationships.In this episode, I interview Dr. Chad Lejeune, Ph.D.We discussed the subtleties of worrying, what keeps worry cycles, and the importance of developing a new relationship with your mind. In the second part of the interview, I shared with Chad an unexpected situation I encountered when traveling, and we used that as an opportunity to discuss micro-skills to manage uncertainty, what-if thoughts, and reassurance-seeking and information-seeking behaviors.Key TakeawaysHow to develop a new relationship with thinkingHow to distinguish effective problem-solving from ineffective oneUnderstanding fear and anxietyDefining worry and its impactThe role of thoughts in worryDistinguishing between productive and nonproductive worryThe consequences of worryAddressing beliefs about worryChanging our relationship with our thoughtsDealing with unexpected situationsEmbracing uncertainty and ambiguityThe anxious brain and uncertaintyProductive thoughts and problem-solvingThe power of narratives and storytellingThe distinction between problem-solving and creating narrativesThe danger of excessive information-seekingThe power of accepting uncertaintyThe importance of learning from the pastShow notes with time stamps00:27 Understanding Fear and Anxiety01:26 Defining Worry and Its Impact02:27 Distinguishing Between Worry and Problem-Solving05:50 The Consequences of Worry06:43 Addressing Beliefs About Worry11:27 Changing Our Relationship with Our Thoughts17:41 Practical Example: Dealing with Unexpected Situations22:59 The Power of Productive Thoughts23:56 The Mind's Narratives and Their Impact25:46 The Distinction Between Problem Solving and Worrying28:15 The Power of Acceptance and Living in the Present28:20 The Pitfalls of Excessive Information Seeking29:12 The Role of Google in Reassurance Seeking32:29 The Importance of Embracing Uncertainty(*) Show notes and resources of this episode(*) Receive free weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe(*) Figure out your playing-it-safe profile in 5 minutes and identify the key thinking strategies that keep you living in your head(*) Learn ACT skills for anxious achievers by taking Dr. Z. ACT courses Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We all experience anxiety in some form, in some way, and in some shape. Because anxiety, fears, and worries can be so uncomfortable, we quickly play-it-safe. And when you’re prone to deeply caring for what you do - as high-achievers, strivers, and perfectionists - then the fears of being a failure or not being good enough are amplified.In this conversation, Annick Seys and I discussed the many layers in which these fears show up and how nourishing your observer-self can shift from self-criticism into self-acceptance, from self-judgment into self-compassion, and from emotional avoidance into curious behaviors.Cultivating your observer-self isn't just about self-distancing; it is about your well-being and living a purpose-driven life.Key TakeawaysHow to deal with the gap between expectations and realityHow to practice self-acceptanceHow to unpack the fear of being a failure in the momentHow to understand the fear of being a failureThe problem with toxic positivityRelational Frame Theory of LanguageHow to nourish your observer-selfUnderstanding the observer-selfThe power of curiositySelf-compassion on-the-goShow notes with time stamps00:31 Understanding Fear-Based Reactions01:00 The Struggles of Time Management01:07 Dealing with Disappointments and Failures05:31 Exploring Self-Acceptance06:01 The Ongoing Exercise of Self-Acceptance11:45 Unpacking the Fear of Failure14:12 The Impact of Toxic Positivity17:47 Tapping into the Observer Self18:01 Exercises to Connect with the Observer Self20:50 Understanding the Observer Self24:03 Experiencing Different Moods26:11 Relating to Past Experiences29:59 Overcoming the Fear of Failure(*) Show notes and resources of this episode(*) Receive free weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe(*) Figure out your playing-it-safe profile in 5 minutes and identify the key thinking strategies that keep you living in your head(*) Learn ACT skills for anxious achievers by taking Dr. Z. ACT courses Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Do you find yourself anxiously anticipating rejection in everyday situations?The fear of being rejected or judged leads to a hyper-awareness of others' facial expressions, opinions, or anticipation of rejection. It’s like you’re expecting others will reject you and interpret a situation using those lenses. This interplay between rejection sensitivity and anxiety influences how you navigate your relationships.Understanding the root of rejection sensitivity and its connection to anxiety is pivotal to stop playing-it-safe automatically.In today’s episode, I interview Ozlem Ayduk, Ph.D.We delve deeper into the psychological processes behind rejection sensitivity and anxiety. You will hear practical strategies to break free from the shackles of rejection sensitivity and anxiety.Key TakeawaysSelf-distancingRejection sensitivityWhat maintains rejection sensitivityThe relationship between experiential avoidance and rejection sensitivityHow ambiguous situations are triggers for responses driven by rejection sensitivityThe use of self-talk Is it helpful to be highly sensitive in certain contexts? When and where? The upsides or benefits of high emotional sensitivityCan someone struggle with rejection sensitivity without a history of rejection? The intersection of emotion regulation and rejection sensitivityIs rejection sensitivity dysphoria different or the same as rejection sensitivity?FREE VALUES-BASED REVIEW (21-PAGES)How often do you play-it-safe? How often do you get stuck in your head? How often do you notice a gap between the life you want to live and the life you're living? You aren’t alone.When dealing with doubts, worries, anxieties, or fears, it's quite likely that you spend a lot of time in your head, thinking and thinking and relying on all types of strategies to manage all those anxious thoughts.If you’re ready to get out of your head and break free from those barriers that stand between you and the life you want to live, this practical 21-page guide will help you get back on track!The reality is that most of us live life letting life happen to us, and if we’re lucky, we figure out what’s truly important to us and what we want to stand for. So, another way to check how we're really living is by pausing, checking what truly matters to you, and whether your actions are congruent with those values or not.It includes a description of 9 life areas, a values thesaurus, a values-dashboard, and reflective prompts for each area in your life.Click here(*) Show notes and resources of this episode(*) Receive free weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe(*) Figure out your playing-it-safe profile in 5 minutes and identify the key thinking strategies that keep you living in your head(*) Learn ACT skills for anxious achievers by taking Dr. Z. ACT courses Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Self-compassion is the willingness to respond to your pain and suffering in the same way a good friend of yours might–with warmth, patience, and understanding. That sounds easy, right? But you know it isn’t.For many, self-criticism is a classic playing-it-safe move. It’s like your mind is a champion at criticizing you in response to those moments in which you feel anxious about something that has happened or could happen.Which of the following fear statements resonate with you?If I’m kind to myself, I will become a weak person.I need to be hard on myself or I will never get everything done.I don’t deserve kindness.A harsh approach keeps me from making mistakes or keeps me disciplined.Self-criticism motivates me all the time.Ask yourself: “Am I afraid of compassion?”In this episode, I chat with Paul Gilbert, the developer of Compassion Focused Therapy.Key TakeawaysThe beginnings of Compassion Focused Therapy (CFT)4 steps to compassionately deal with your inner criticThe difference between shame and guiltHow to approach self-forgivenessThe intersection of self-compassion and exposure practicesPaul Gilbert’s self-compassion daily practiceWhat to do if your mind thinks that “self-compassion is weak, it is being permissive with yourself, or that you’re letting yourself off the hook.”How to deal compassionately with anger(*) Show notes and resources of this episode(*) Receive free weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe(*) Figure out your playing-it-safe profile in 5 minutes and identify the key thinking strategies that keep you living in your head(*) Learn ACT skills for anxious achievers by taking Dr. Z. ACT courses Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It was a true pleasure to discover the work and passion of Sonya Looney; her enthusiasm, laughs, and insights are contagious!There are many golden nuggets in this conversation about skillfully managing comparison thoughts, rumination, self-doubt, shame, values-based strategies, and much more. Key TakeawaysThe mindset of an athleteThe upsides and downsides of over-preparing and over-workingHow to skillfully manage unpredictabilityAcceptance of emotionsHow to deal with a strong attachment to goals or winningDefusion: thought - labelingGoodhart’s lawHow to manage physical fatigue using acceptance & defusion skillsHow to go back to your values when your mind gets noisyHow to manage comparison thoughtsABC of resilience(*) Show notes and resources of this episode(*) Receive free weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe(*) Figure out your playing-it-safe profile in 5 minutes and identify the key thinking strategies that keep you living in your head(*) Learn ACT skills for anxious achievers by taking Dr. Z. ACT courses Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This is part 2 of my conversation with Dr. Matthew McKay, Ph.D. In part 1, we discussed the foundations of how Dr. McKay thinks of process-based therapy. Today, we discuss, in particular, different mechanisms of action:What is attentional trainingHow to look at your values when getting stressedHow to practice acceptance How to handle uncertaintyHow reassurance-seeking shows up in our day-to-day life(*) Show notes and resources of this episode(*) Receive free weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe(*) Figure out your playing-it-safe profile in 5 minutes and identify the key thinking strategies that keep you living in your head(*) Learn ACT skills for anxious achievers by taking Dr. Z. ACT courses Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

If anxiety is a part of our day to day life, if we hold on to the framework that to be human is to be anxious, how did anxiety ever become a problem? How do you go from worrying about not being good enough to chronic states of worry? How do you go from feeling uncomfortable taking the elevator to developing an elevator phobia?What maintains a psychological struggle? And what are the skills – the core skills – that you can learn to navigate those anxious moments and get back into your life?Short-term fixes that help us avoid or numb our emotions may temporarily alleviate our internal discomfort, but the same responses can also end up causing anxiety, depression, chronic anger, and even physical health problems.In this episode, I chat with Matthew Mckay, Ph.D.Key Takeaways:The difference between rumination and worryRepetitive negative thinking as a processWhat is a transdiagnostic processHow anxiety becomes a problem in our lifeWhat is a safety-seeking behaviorProcess-based changes(*) Show notes and resources of this episode(*) Receive free weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe(*) Figure out your playing-it-safe profile in 5 minutes and identify the key thinking strategies that keep you living in your head(*) Learn ACT skills for anxious achievers by taking Dr. Z. ACT courses Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Do you remember last week when your mind was criticizing you and asking you to play-it-safe?Using Acceptance and Commitment Skills, you are always invited to bring awareness to your internal experiences, especially when you are feeling stuck in a habit or unhelpful behavioral patterns such as overthinking, procrastinating, or others. You are also invited to figure out your values and take action toward what truly matters to you.In this episode, Julian McNally, Ms. Psych., and I discuss those values-based actions when your mind tries to convince you to engage in old behavioral patterns.Key TakeawaysCreative HopelessnessValues-based behaviorsValues-based exposuresNotice approaching versus avoidant behaviorsHow to practice acceptance of messy momentsFocus on your doing your best, not being the bestFocusing on what is happening right now instead of why is happening.(*) Show notes and resources of this episode(*) Receive free weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe(*) Figure out your playing-it-safe profile in 5 minutes and identify the key thinking strategies that keep you living in your head(*) Learn ACT skills for anxious achievers by taking Dr. Z. ACT courses Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

When was the last time you had a social mishap in a conversation? Do you remember how it feels to say the wrong thing at the wrong time?If you’re a shy person or are struggling with social anxiety or social perfectionism, you are holding onto the beliefs that you must sound smart, interesting, or funny; that there should never be awkward silences in conversations; that you shouldn’t stumble over words; that you should never mispronounce a word.Ways that you may manage those thoughts and the anxiety that come with them are by avoiding social situations, rehearsing over and over what you are going to say and how you are saying it, only talking to people you feel comfortable with, or comparing your social performance with others’ social performance.When you are unable to meet this perfectionistic social standard, you feel that you have failed. But the truth is that none of us can live up to this perfectionistic social standard or have perfect social performances. When we start to accept this and stop automatically playing-it-safe, we feel better about ourselves and have less anxiety in social situations.In this conversation with Julian McNally, we discussed acceptance and commitment skills for anxiety related to social situations.Key TakeawaysHow to live your valuesHow to practice commitmentPlaying-it-safe How to manage negativity biasesHow to deal with comparison thoughtsContext sensitivity(*) Show notes and resources of this episode(*) Receive free weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe(*) Figure out your playing-it-safe profile in 5 minutes and identify the key thinking strategies that keep you living in your head(*) Learn ACT skills for anxious achievers by taking Dr. Z. ACT courses Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Our minds are amazing at many, many things. Our minds are capable of remembering the birthday of the ones we love, calculating a budget for our next trip, thinking about our next writing project, and coming up with questions for a podcast. Our minds are also capable of ruminating, dwelling, coming up with strange thoughts, announcing all types of bad scenarios, and many more …why are our minds both so awesome and so challenging to deal with at times? How can we skillfully and effectively deal with our busy minds?In today’s episode, I interview Josh Malina, host of the podcast “Anxiety Book Club.” We discuss the different ways in which our minds influence our physical and mental health and the different approaches to dealing with them.Josh and I discuss how mindfulness and meditation can help us deal with our busy minds; he points out different times in which anxiety, intrusive thoughts, and worry thoughts took him away from being present and pushed him to play-it-safe.You will hear from Josh how regular mindfulness practice has helped him transform his relationship with his thoughts, become an observer of his thoughts, and be non-judgmental of his worries, fears, and anxieties.We discuss in particular three practices: exposure exercises, acceptance and commitment skills, and internal family systems.I leave you with this quote:“You can spend minutes, hours, days, weeks, or even months over-analyzing a situation; trying to put the pieces together, justifying what could’ve or would’ve happened… Or you can just leave the pieces on the floor and move the fuck on.”– Tupac ShakurKey TakeawaysWhat is OCDWhat is Generalized Anxiety DisorderWhat is Internal Family SystemsWhat is perspective takingValuesExposure therapyTalk therapyTranscendental meditationChoiceless meditationMBSR(*) Show notes and resources of this episode(*) Receive free weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe(*) Figure out your playing-it-safe profile in 5 minutes and identify the key thinking strategies that keep you living in your head(*) Learn ACT skills for anxious achievers by taking Dr. Z. ACT courses Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

When was the last time you had an aha moment in which your next steps were clear? Do you remember how it is to be in the midst of a difficult situation, and then, have clarity of what you need to do?If you pay attention to your experiences, you may notice those aha moments in which your choices are clear - you will be able to clearly see what you are longing for or the changes you need to make in your life.Without that awareness, it’s easier to play-it-safe, live automatically, and continue to respond to all those anxieties, worries, and fears in the same way you have been doing for years.One way to build that awareness is through the practice of mindfulness.In this conversation, Seth Gillihan, Ph.D. and I discuss how to nourish your mindfulness practice. In a world that moves so fast, and there are hundreds of mindfulness apps, books on mindfulness, and mindfulness teachers, it is easy to develop misconceptions surrounding the practice of mindfulness or to hope for a quick fix with it.  But how can you really cultivate your mindfulness practice in your daily life?  Key TakeawaysHow to approach mindfulness with a beginner’s mindThe intersection of Christianity and mindfulnessTips to practice mindfulness in your day-to-day lifeHow to use movement as a way to practice mindfulnessHow to bring yourself back to the present when your mind is wanderingThe intersection of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and mindfulnessHow to coach yourself to recognize thoughts as thoughts versus getting consumed by themHow to practice non-attachment to how things are supposed to beThe relationship between non-attachment and mindfulnessHow looking for evidence for and against a worry may not be helpfulHow to use mindfulness skills to manage worry The benefits of developing an observer-self(*) Show notes and resources of this episode(*) Receive free weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe(*) Figure out your playing-it-safe profile in 5 minutes and identify the key thinking strategies that keep you living in your head(*) Learn ACT skills for anxious achievers by taking Dr. Z. ACT courses Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this second part of my conversation with Andrew Nalband, we discussed in detail how he manages all the noise that shows up in his head, what has worked, and what hasn’t when dealing with a tendency to do things right and perfectly.Key TakeawaysWhy meditation/mindfulness practices matterThe influence of cell phones on our thinkingThe difference between cognitive restructuring and acceptanceA key question to ask yourself when your mind comes up with a lot of thoughtsThe impact of “positive thinking” in our wellbeingHow to practice mindfulness on-the-go(*) Show notes and resources of this episode(*) Receive free weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe(*) Figure out your playing-it-safe profile in 5 minutes and identify the key thinking strategies that keep you living in your head(*) Learn ACT skills for anxious achievers by taking Dr. Z. ACT courses Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

There is nothing wrong with striving to do things right and perfectly. It depends on how often you do it, when you do it, and how it works in your life in the long run.What is unhealthy is demanding perfectionism, which involves demanding that you are perfect and do things perfectly, otherwise, you may think of yourself as unworthy, not good enough, or a screw-up. Those particular patterns of perfectionistic actions can generate much anxiety, depression, loneliness, and insurmountable levels of stress, even when it feels good to do things right and perfectly in the moment.Andrew Nalband is the Chief Executive Officer at Thunk Notes, a tool for thinking and journaling. In this conversation, Andrew genuinely and kindly shares his struggles with perfectionism, and how he skillfully manages them these days.Key TakeawaysThe raw version of how perfectionistic actions show upThe plus, benefits, and cons of perfectionistic actionsHow perfectionistic actions show up in all areas of lifeIf-then thoughtsHow to hold our mind lightly The beginnings of practicing mindfulnessHow to cultivate presence in your day-to-day life(*) Show notes and resources of this episode(*) Receive free weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe(*) Figure out your playing-it-safe profile in 5 minutes and identify the key thinking strategies that keep you living in your head(*) Learn ACT skills for anxious achievers by taking Dr. Z. ACT courses Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Stress is nearly unavoidable in our daily lives. Unexpected things can happen to all of us, and often, we may choose to play-it-safe by working harder and harder, doing more and more.I am sharing today an interview with Espree Devora. Espree has been recently featured in INC Magazine as one of the top 30 women in tech to follow and is known as “The Girl Who Gets it Done.”Key Takeaways:How to find your own rhythms to navigate stressful momentsHow to get things done without losing yourselfHow to keep yourself accountable without being harsh with one’s selfHow to practice distress tolerance skills on-the-go(*) Show notes and resources of this episode(*) Receive free weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe(*) Figure out your playing-it-safe profile in 5 minutes and identify the key thinking strategies that keep you living in your head(*) Learn ACT skills for anxious achievers by taking Dr. Z. ACT courses Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Have you ever been struggling emotionally and a partner, colleague or caregiver overlooked you or made you feel worse? “I would have never let that happen,” is uttered or implied. Or an important other misses your emotional needs altogether and just focuses on themselves. When this invalidation or dismissal happens in a key relationship or two repeatedly over years, it can create a trauma of omission. It's about what you are not getting so you don't know you are missing it. One learns: “No one is going to help me when I feel like a failure, excluded or down. I have to turn my feelings off on my own.” Abandoning your inner emotional life in service of what others are comfortable with or what your professional culture rewards. In this episode, you will learn about chronic misattunement and how, instead of playing-it-safe by avoiding or placating, you can learn skills of self-care and how to ask for your needs to be met with the people that matter. Attunement is to show interest in another's world. How they've been impacted by something they've experienced and what that experience means to them. I interviewed Kelly Werner Ph.D., who kindly shares her understanding and approach to struggles driven by chronic misattunement.  Key TakeawaysWhat is chronic misattunement?Playing-it-safe moves related to chronic misattunementHow chronic misattunement shows up in relationshipsA.T.T.U.N.E (acronym) Process to heal from chronic misattunement (*) Show notes and resources of this episode(*) Receive free weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe(*) Figure out your playing-it-safe profile in 5 minutes and identify the key thinking strategies that keep you living in your head(*) Learn ACT skills for anxious achievers by taking Dr. Z. ACT courses Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Have you ever gone to the emergency room?Have you ever thought of how emergency doctors face stress?Have you ever considered how an emergency doctor manages anxiety as part of their work life?Today, I’m sharing with you the interview with Dr. Mark Hoffman, M.D., a board certified emergency physician, with over 30 years of practice.It was a treat to hear from Dr. Hoffman on how he:Manages stress when taking care of multiple patients at onceMakes decisions when working with patients with acute conditionsDeals with interpersonal stressPerforms a “mental triage”Juggles all tasks-medical and administrative-during his work shiftsAre the best E.R. doctors the best jugglers?What can we learn from them?What can you learn from them?(*) Show notes and resources of this episode(*) Receive free weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe(*) Figure out your playing-it-safe profile in 5 minutes and identify the key thinking strategies that keep you living in your head(*) Learn ACT skills for anxious achievers by taking Dr. Z. ACT courses Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Can’t make up your mind about marrying your girlfriend or not? Can’t make up your mind about the TV you need to buy? Can’t make up your mind about staying or quitting your job?If the prospect of making a decision makes you feel overwhelmed and paralyzed, then you need to listen to this episode!In this episode, Dr. Sally Winston, Psy.D. and I discuss the processes behind making a decision and what keeps you stuck when having to make a choice. Quite often, when facing these dilemmas, we play-it-safe by overthinking, dwelling, or ruminating, and end up putting ourselves into analysis-paralysis: thinking a lot about a choice without taking action. If you’re in the habit of not making a choice, you may be dealing with chronic indecisiveness, which is more than ordinary indecisions. Key TakeawaysThe processes behind chronic indecisionHow to nurture experiential knowledgeWise mindThe limitations of pros and consHow to nurture a wise mind(*) Show notes and resources of this episode(*) Receive free weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe(*) Figure out your playing-it-safe profile in 5 minutes and identify the key thinking strategies that keep you living in your head(*) Learn ACT skills for anxious achievers by taking Dr. Z. ACT courses Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

How often do you assume the worst-case-scenario when facing a difficult situation?When was the last time someone invited you to a party, and you started worrying about it months in advance?Do you stress about situations that have not happened yet?Anybody can learn how our minds work and how to work with them. When we are dealing with worries, anxieties, fears, we all play-it-safe. You might be playing it safe. If you get stuck thinking of doom and gloomy scenarios, you may find yourself asking others what to do in order for you to not make any more mistakes.In this episode, I interview Dr. Sally Winston, Psy.D., an anxiety expert. She and I discuss different skills to manage those thoughts - the future-oriented ones - and those moments in which you get stuck in imagination. As you listen to this episode, you will learn actionable skills to stop worrying about what might happen and live fully in the moment. Key TakeawaysWhat is anticipatory anxietyHow to handle those moments when your imagination hijacks youThree different levels of fearThe difference between rumination and planningHow to shift from “what if” to “what is”Dr. Winston’s metaphor of how to handle uncertaintyThe opposite of uncertainty … is not what you think it is …MetacognitionsProductive thinking versus unproductive thinking(*) Show notes and resources of this episode(*) Receive free weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe(*) Figure out your playing-it-safe profile in 5 minutes and identify the key thinking strategies that keep you living in your head(*) Learn ACT skills for anxious achievers by taking Dr. Z. ACT courses Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This is part 2 of my interview with Todd Kashdan, Ph.D.Key TakeawaysHow to persuade others skillfullyHow intolerance and speed of uncertainty feed into rigid thinkingThe connection between persuasion skills and acceptance and commitment skillsThe difference between task-oriented problem solving and relationship problemsWhat is cognitive diversity and how it plays in our group interactionsHow to use cognitive defusion when dealing with interpersonal difficultiesWhy viewpoint diversity is goodHow to spark curiosity, not fearHow to build stronger alliances during conflict(*) Show notes and resources of this episode(*) Receive free weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe(*) Figure out your playing-it-safe profile in 5 minutes and identify the key thinking strategies that keep you living in your head(*) Learn ACT skills for anxious achievers by taking Dr. Z. ACT courses Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Have you ever played-it-safe by keeping your opinions to yourself?When was the last time you felt afraid of social rejection that you did not say what you really thought about a topic in fear of rocking the boat?How often do you play-it-safe by placating and going along with others' opinions so you are liked by others?Group thinking, agreeing quickly with others, avoiding sharing our opinions, or making sure we don’t rock the boat are the many ways in which we play-it-safe when dealing with fears of rejection, not being liked, or not belonging in a group. But how do those playing-it-safe moves work in our relationships with others and our relationship with ourselves? When is it effective to minimize interpersonal conflict, and when is it not? How and when do we examine our beliefs about how things should be? How do we avoid cognitive rigidity?In this conversation with Dr. Todd Kashdan, Ph.D., he shares his research on persuasion, healthy dissentment, group thinking, and skills to handle conflict that go beyond assertiveness training. Key Takeaways:How group thinking leads us to “underseen” or “overseen” social situations or any other mattersWhat is healthy resentmentSkills to handle cognitive rigidityThe basics of the science of persuasionHow intolerance of uncertainty plays a role in our thinkingWhy people in disadvantage still support leaders that don’t favor themThe case of Evo Morales, the former president of Bolivia, and how group thinking created a different image of his government(*) Show notes and resources of this episode(*) Receive free weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe(*) Figure out your playing-it-safe profile in 5 minutes and identify the key thinking strategies that keep you living in your head(*) Learn ACT skills for anxious achievers by taking Dr. Z. ACT courses Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Have you ever been caught in a spiral of self-criticism? When was the last time your inner critic took over your day? We all have stories we’ve created about ourselves - some of them positive and some of them negative. If you suffer from low self-esteem, your story may include these types of narratives: “I’m a failure,” “I’ll never be able to do that,” or “if only I were smarter or more attractive, I could be happy.” Dealing effectively with your inner critic doesn't happen overnight, but if you learn compassionate, evidence-based and actionable skills to handle all those stories, to relate to them skillfully, you can learn to accept yourself as you are and not as who you wish to be.Key TakeawaysIn this conversation, Dr. Joe Oliver, Ph.D. and I discussed:What is self-esteemHow to handle self-criticismDefusion: thanking your mindHow to notice when you’re entangled with your mindHow to notice and catch your playing-it-safe movesThe story behind his bookDealing with the monsters of the negative stories with dignity and respect(*) Show notes and resources of this episode(*) Receive free weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe(*) Figure out your playing-it-safe profile in 5 minutes and identify the key thinking strategies that keep you living in your head(*) Learn ACT skills for anxious achievers by taking Dr. Z. ACT courses Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Resilience is usually understood as the process and the outcome of successfully adapting to difficult or challenging life experiences (American Psychological Association (APA)).In the information era, being exposed to all types of stressors is the norm and not the exception. We may struggle to learn how to deal with a world that moves fast, pressures us in many different directions, and a world in which hundreds of things are outside of our control.In this podcast episode, I discuss with Dennis Relojo-Howell the ways in which he became resilient and the different ways to nourish resilient practices.Dennis is a social entrepreneur, speaker, and resilience researcher, originally born in the Philippines. In 2014, he founded Psychreg, an award-winning media project dedicated to keeping everyone informed about psychology, mental health, and wellness.In this conversation, Dennis shared:- How he overcame growing up in a stressful environment- How he learned to pursue what matters in the midst of social stressors- How he uses creative writing as a resilient practice(*) Show notes and resources of this episode(*) Receive free weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe(*) Figure out your playing-it-safe profile in 5 minutes and identify the key thinking strategies that keep you living in your head(*) Learn ACT skills for anxious achievers by taking Dr. Z. ACT courses Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

60% of people dealing with depression are likely to be dealing with anxiety. If you're anxious, you are also likely to be depressed.In the case of fear-based struggles, it is much more common to struggle with different types of fears than a single one. So if you’re dealing with attacks, it’s also possible that you're dealing with chronic worry, or if you’re dealing with chronic worry, it’s also possible that you’re struggling with fears of public speaking. Traditional CBT focuses on treating a disorder such as social anxiety or depression. The problem with focusing on a single disorder is that the root cause of those struggles is not addressed.A core characteristic of ACT is to focus on teaching you psychological skills to increase your well-being, mental health, and the quality of your life. Instead of focusing on a diagnosis, ACT tackles the drivers of that particular diagnosis; therefore, ACT by nature is what is called a process-based model. In this conversation Joseph Ciarrochi, Ph.D. and I discuss:The different psychological processes that are part of any struggle we deal with.The relationship between psychological processes and evolution.The importance of variation, selection, retention and context as drivers of changesThe challenges of letting go of “all those stories about who we are.”The importance of paying attention to our physiological responses when getting stuck(*) Show notes and resources of this episode(*) Receive free weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe(*) Figure out your playing-it-safe profile in 5 minutes and identify the key thinking strategies that keep you living in your head(*) Learn ACT skills for anxious achievers by taking Dr. Z. ACT courses Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Self-criticism is a classic playing-it-safe move. We criticize ourselves as a way to think that we're going to be able to control the situation, control ourselves, and control circumstances in order to feel safe. How does it really work for you when you spend hours and hours criticizing yourself? How does it really work when you try to motivate yourself by being harder and harder with yourself? But what if instead of spending hours and hours of criticizing, negatively judging, and putting yourself down, you learn skills to treat yourself with kindness, gentleness, and care as you would treat others?In this episode, I interview Dr. Dennis Tirch, Ph.D. Dr. Dennis Tirch founded the Center for Compassion-Focused Therapy in the USA. He has been described as one of the country's foremost experts on CFT and the psychology of compassion.Dr. Tirch is the author of 6 books and numerous chapters and peer-reviewed articles on mindfulness, acceptance, and compassion in psychotherapy.With Dr. Laura Silberstein-Tirch and others, Dr. Tirch is currently developing a research protocol involving behavioral science and CFT for treating anxiety, worry, and fear-based difficulties through compassionate courage cultivation.(*) Show notes and resources of this episode(*) Receive free weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe(*) Figure out your playing-it-safe profile in 5 minutes and identify the key thinking strategies that keep you living in your head(*) Learn ACT skills for anxious achievers by taking Dr. Z. ACT courses Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Are you an overachiever?Some perfectionistic traits - e.g., being hardworking or paying attention to details - can be extremely handy. But what happens when you don’t do things in moderation and feel compelled to do more and more, do everything right, and avoid mistakes?In this episode, I chat with Clarissa Ong, Ph.D., about her work on perfectionism.We discussed in detail:The coherence trapMeta-awareness: awareness about awarenessExposure exercises as awareness exercisesMotivational flexibility Uncertainty workoutsSelf-compassion practices(*) Show notes and resources of this episode(*) Receive free weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe(*) Figure out your playing-it-safe profile in 5 minutes and identify the key thinking strategies that keep you living in your head(*) Learn ACT skills for anxious achievers by taking Dr. Z. ACT courses Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

To be human is to experience worry, fear, anxiety, and stress. To be human is to play-it-safe.But how do you handle those internal reactions when encountering life-threatening situations?What if being exposed to those unusual situations is part of your day-to-day life?Today, I share a special interview with Lance Morrison, former Captain Police Officer.You will hear different micro-skills Lance uses to handle life-threatening situations such as:Focusing on one thing at a time.Compassion-based responsesFocusing on what mattersExercising(*) Show notes and resources of this episode(*) Receive free weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe(*) Figure out your playing-it-safe profile in 5 minutes and identify the key thinking strategies that keep you living in your head(*) Learn ACT skills for anxious achievers by taking Dr. Z. ACT courses Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This is a super special interview with one of my favorite colleagues and author, Jonathan Kaplan, author of “Urban Mindfulness.”In this conversation we discussed:One of Jonathan’s favorite mindfulness exercises: sending warm wishes to people around youWhy playing-it-safe behaviors are naturalWhat is a playing-it-safe moveTwo skills to distinguish effective playing-it-safe moves from ineffective onesHow to handle uncertaintyHow to handle ruling-thoughts about thinking (metacognitions)In the middle of the conversation, you will hear me practicing “how to say” one of my favorite words in English, and one of Jonathan’s favorite jokes related to anxiety and playing-it-safe.(*) Show notes and resources of this episode(*) Receive free weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe(*) Figure out your playing-it-safe profile in 5 minutes and identify the key thinking strategies that keep you living in your head(*) Learn ACT skills for anxious achievers by taking Dr. Z. ACT courses Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Subscribe to the Playing-it-safe Newsletter: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-newsletter/Have you ever felt anxious when driving?Have you ever had a panic attack?Have you ever felt an unexpected tingling sensation in your arm?Do you know how it feels when running a marathon?Have you ever pushed your body beyond your limits?In all those scenarios, it’s quite likely you're going to experience some form of bodily-based sensation, and naturally, your brain is going to “make sense of it” by either perceiving it as a threat or as an insignificant sensation.If your brain perceives those sensations as a threat, it will naturally push you to play-it-safe.In this conversation with Dr. Diana Hill, you will learn specific skills to handle those uncomfortable bodily sensations, slow down, and fundamentally choose your response.(*) Show notes and resources of this episode(*) Receive free weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe(*) Figure out your playing-it-safe profile in 5 minutes and identify the key thinking strategies that keep you living in your head(*) Learn ACT skills for anxious achievers by taking Dr. Z. ACT courses Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In today’s episode of the Playing-It-Safe podcast, Dr. Z. and Lou Lasprugrato, MFT, discuss the various Acceptance and Commitment Skills (ACT) and how they apply to our day-to-day life.ACT skills are applicable not just for therapy or coaching but as a way of living life. At the end of the day, real change happens by taking action, one action after another. What we discussed with Lou Lasprugato:How playing-it-safe moves are part of our day-to-day lifeWhat is perspective-taking or self-as-context within the ACT model4 ways to think about self-as-contextHow to make values-based choices on-the-goHow the 6 ACT processes are intertwined  What's aversive and what's appetitive when looking at your actions(*) Show notes and resources of this episode(*) Receive free weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe(*) Figure out your playing-it-safe profile in 5 minutes and identify the key thinking strategies that keep you living in your head(*) Learn ACT skills for anxious achievers by taking Dr. Z. ACT courses Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Michael P. Twohig, Ph.D. is the co-director of the ACT Research Group, a licensed psychologist in the state of Utah, and a Professor of Psychology at Utah State University.In this episode, I chat with Michael about his research on Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) on perfectionism, we discuss in particular, one of the papers published in his lab: A randomized controlled trial of acceptance and commitment therapy for clinical perfectionism (2019).We chatted about the neurological screenings participants completed, the challenging moments of participants being attached to rules about how things are supposed to be, and how distinguishing helpful versus unhelpful perfectionistic actions is introduced in the study.You will also hear Michael sharing one of his favorite metaphors to facilitate behavioral flexibility.Social mediaInstagram: Dr. Z.  https://www.instagram.com/dr.z.passionatebehaviorist/Twitter: https://twitter.com/DrZ_behavioristDr. Z’s website: www.thisisdoctorz.comDr. Z’s therapy/coaching website: www.eastbaybehaviortherapycenter.com(*) Show notes and resources of this episode(*) Receive free weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe(*) Figure out your playing-it-safe profile in 5 minutes and identify the key thinking strategies that keep you living in your head(*) Learn ACT skills for anxious achievers by taking Dr. Z. ACT courses Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.