PODCAST · health
Sex and Psychology Podcast
by Dr. Justin Lehmiller
The Sex and Psychology Podcast is the sex ed you never got in school—and won’t find anywhere else. Kinsey Institute researcher Dr. Justin Lehmiller takes you on a journey through the psychology of sex and relationships, offering practical tips along the way that can help you take your intimate life to the next level. Learn more on Dr. Lehmiller’s blog at sexandpsychology.com
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Episode 536: Was The Bridgerton Era As Sexy As We Think?
Shows like Bridgerton invite us to imagine the past as a time of elaborate courtship, forbidden desire, and passionate romance. But was the past really as sexy as we like to think it was? In today’s show, we’re going to separate fact from fantasy when it comes to sex in the Bridgerton era and discuss what dating, courtship, marriage, and sexual relationships actually looked like at the time.My guest is Dr. Kate Lister, a historian specializing in the history of sex and sexuality. She is host of the award-winning History Hit podcast Betwixt the Sheets: The History of Sex, Scandal & Society. Kate is also author of A Curious History of Sex, Harlots, Whores & Hackabouts: A History of Sex for Sale, and the new book, FLICK: The Story of Female Pleasure.Some of the specific topics we cover include:How different was the sexual reality of the Bridgerton era from the fantasy we've created around it?What was sex actually like back then, and what were the risks?Why do we have a tendency to romanticize the past? Does this say something about what's missing from modern dating?You can check out Kate's website to explore more of her work and follow her on social media @drkatelister.Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology.***Thank you to our sponsors! If you’re 21 or older, get 30% OFF your first order with IndaCloud with code JUSTIN at https://indacloud.co #indacloudpodIf you're looking to gain a broad understanding of human sexuality or refresh your knowledge, check out the upcoming Human Sexuality Intensive courses at the Kinsey Institute: https://kinseyinstitute.org/learning/human-sexuality-intensive.html ***Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram.Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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Episode 534: The Complicated Relationship Between BDSM And Mental Health
BDSM can be a powerful source of pleasure, connection, and self-expression. But when mental health challenges enter the picture, they can also raise important questions about consent, communication, triggers, and emotional safety. So how can people navigate kink in ways that support their mental health rather than undermine it?My guest is Rebecca Blanton (AKA Auntie Vice,) a writer and kink educator. She runs the award-winning blog LoveLettersToAUnicorn.com and has published several books, including The Big Workbook for Submissives, a finalist for the 2018 Golden Flogger Award. She is also author of the forthcoming book, Kinky & Curious: Navigating BDSM with Mental Illness or Neurodivergence.Some of the specific topics we cover include:How can mental health affect consent in BDSM?Do people have an obligation to disclose mental health conditions to sexual partners?What does research say about the link between trauma and BDSM?What psychiatric medication effects should be considered in BDSM safety planning?You can check our Rebecca's website to learn more about her work.Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology.***Thank you to our sponsors! Born from over 10 years of longevity research, OneSkin is helping you unlock your healthiest skin now and as you age. Get 15% off OneSkin with the code JUSTIN at https://www.oneskin.co/justinThe Kinsey Institute is where the world turns to understand sex and relationships. You can help continue its expert-led research by donating to the Kinsey Institute Research Fund. Learn more and make a donation here: https://give.myiu.org/centers-institutes/I380010749.html Load Boost is a supplement designed to improve the taste, volume, and overall health of your semen. If you want to elevate your sexual performance, check out Load Boost from VB Health. Visit vb.health to learn more and save 10% with code JUSTIN.***Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram.Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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Episode 533: A Beginner's Guide To Swinging
For some couples, swinging can be a way to bring novelty, excitement, and sexual exploration into their relationship. But opening the door to new experiences can also bring new challenges, from jealousy and boundary-setting to navigating differences in what each partner wants. So why do couples decide to swing, what does it actually look like in practice, and what separates a positive experience from one that creates conflict? In this episode, we’re taking a deep dive into swinging and what it takes to make it work.I am joined once again by Dr. Stephanie Sigler, a licensed professional counselor, certified sex therapist, clinical sexologist, author, educator, and founder of Evolve Your Intimacy. She specializes in helping individuals and couples navigate relationships, intimacy, attachment, trauma, and sexual wellness. She is the author of The Clinician's Guide to Ethical Non-Monogamous Relationships, and host of the Evolve Your Intimacy Podcast.Some of the specific topics we cover include:What distinguishes a swinging relationship from other forms of consensual non-monogamy?What are some of the different forms swinging can take?What are some or the most common challenges couples face when they begin swinging?How should couples approach initial conversations about swinging if they've never tried it before?When partners aren't equally interested in swinging or their interests change, what should you do?You can check out Stephanie's website and follow her on Instagram @evolve_your_intimacy to learn more.Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology.***Thank you to our sponsors! If you’re 21 or older, get 30% OFF your first order with IndaCloud with code JUSTIN at https://indacloud.co #indacloudpodAttached Therapy offers personalized therapy for individuals and couples navigating infidelity, sexual disconnection, relationship strain, and other complex intimacy concerns. Founder Jason Powell, LMFT and AASECT Certified Sex Therapist, offers in-person sessions in Manhattan and Brooklyn Heights, as well as virtual therapy in multiple states. Learn more at https://www.attachedtherapy.com/Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today.***Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram.Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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Episode 532: Why Jealousy Isn't The Problem
Jealousy is one of the most complicated—and misunderstood—emotions we experience in intimate relationships. We tend to think of jealousy as inherently unhealthy, something we should suppress, overcome, or eliminate altogether. But what if jealousy itself isn’t actually the problem? In this episode, we explore what jealousy is really trying to tell us, why attempts to get rid of it can sometimes backfire, and how we can learn to respond to it in healthier ways.My guest is Dr. Stephanie Sigler, a licensed professional counselor, certified sex therapist, clinical sexologist, author, educator, and founder of Evolve Your Intimacy. She specializes in helping individuals and couples navigate relationships, intimacy, attachment, trauma, and sexual wellness. She is the author of The Clinician's Guide to Ethical Non-Monogamous Relationships, and host of the Evolve Your Intimacy Podcast.Some of the specific topics we cover include:Why is jealousy so misunderstood in relationships?How can separating jealousy from envy or insecurity help us respond more effectively?How do attachment styles shape the way we experience jealousy?What can monogamous couples learn about jealousy from non-monogamous relationships?What does a healthy conversation about jealousy actually look like?You can check Stephanie's website and follow her on Instagram @evolve_your_intimacy to learn more.Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology.***Thank you to our sponsors! If you’re 21 or older, get 30% OFF your first order with IndaCloud with code JUSTIN at https://indacloud.co #indacloudpodIf you're looking to gain a broad understanding of human sexuality or refresh your knowledge, check out the upcoming Human Sexuality Intensive courses at the Kinsey Institute: https://kinseyinstitute.org/learning/human-sexuality-intensive.html ***Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram.Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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Episode 531: Do Dads Get Postpartum Depression, Too?
Becoming a father doesn’t just change a man’s brain. It can also change his sense of identity, his mental health, and his relationships. Fatherhood can bring profound meaning and connection, but it can also introduce new sources of stress, vulnerability, and conflict that we don’t always talk about. So how does becoming a dad change men psychologically? And what do men stand to gain from being more deeply involved in parenting?I am joined once again by Darby Saxbe, a clinical psychologist and tenured full professor of psychology at the University of Southern California. She has published over eighty scientific articles in peer-reviewed journals. Her research focuses on the transition to parenthood, particularly the neural and hormonal underpinnings of fatherhood. Her latest book is titled Dad Brain: The New Science of Fatherhood and How It Shapes Men’s Lives.Some of the specific topics we cover include:How does becoming a dad transform men psychologically?How common are mental health struggles among new fathers?Why is becoming a parent so challenging for couples?How can engaged fatherhood improve men’s health?You can visit Darby's website to learn more about Dad Brain and follow her on Instagram @darbysaxbephdGot a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology.***Thank you to our sponsors! Born from over 10 years of longevity research, OneSkin is helping you unlock your healthiest skin now and as you age. Get 15% off OneSkin with the code JUSTIN at https://www.oneskin.co/justinAttached Therapy offers personalized therapy for individuals and couples navigating infidelity, sexual disconnection, relationship strain, and other complex intimacy concerns. Founder Jason Powell, LMFT and AASECT Certified Sex Therapist, offers in-person sessions in Manhattan and Brooklyn Heights, as well as virtual therapy in multiple states. Learn more at https://www.attachedtherapy.com/Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today.***Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram.Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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Episode 530: The Surprising Science Of The Dad Brain
Becoming a parent changes just about every aspect of life. But it doesn’t just change your routines, priorities, and relationships—it can actually change your brain and body. And while we’ve long recognized the profound biological transformation that accompanies motherhood, we’re only beginning to understand what happens to men when they become fathers. So what exactly is a “dad brain?” How does fatherhood reshape the male brain, hormones, and even the body?My guest is Darby Saxbe, a clinical psychologist and tenured full professor of psychology at the University of Southern California. She has published over eighty scientific articles in peer-reviewed journals. Her research focuses on the transition to parenthood, particularly the neural and hormonal underpinnings of fatherhood. Her latest book is titled Dad Brain: The New Science of Fatherhood and How It Shapes Men’s Lives.Some of the specific topics we cover include:How (and why) does becoming a parent change the brain?How similar are “dad brain” and “mom brain?"What happens to testosterone when men become fathers?Is there a biological reason for the "dad bod?"You can visit Darby's website to learn more about Dad Brain and follow her on Instagram @darbysaxbephdGot a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology.***Thank you to our sponsors! Cozy Earth’s Labor Day Sale is happening now through September 8th. Head to cozyearth.com and use my code JUSTIN for an exclusive 30% off, the biggest savings of the season. And if you see a post-purchase survey, mention that you heard about Cozy Earth right here!Born from over 10 years of longevity research, OneSkin is helping you unlock your healthiest skin now and as you age. Get 15% off OneSkin with the code JUSTIN at https://www.oneskin.co/justinThe Kinsey Institute is where the world turns to understand sex and relationships. You can help continue its expert-led research by donating to the Kinsey Institute Research Fund. Learn more and make a donation here: https://give.myiu.org/centers-institutes/I380010749.html ***Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram.Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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Episode 529: The Menopause Revolution Is Here
Menopause is finally getting the attention it deserves, with growing recognition of its impact on sexual health, relationships, work, and quality of life. At the center of this conversation is hormone therapy, which has been surrounded by fear and confusion since the Women’s Health Initiative study in the early 2000s, which dramatically changed how it was perceived and prescribed. Today, scientists are revisiting that history as a new generation pushes for better information, better care, and greater choice in managing menopause.My guest is Alicia Rose, an award-winning director and the Founder of Menopunks—a documentary, podcast, and activist movement championing hormonal education, access, and reproductive justice. A prolific filmmaker with deep roots as both a musician and indie music industry leader, she has directed more than three dozen music videos for global artists.Some of the specific topics we cover include:What have women missed out on due to fears about hormone therapy?Why is menopause often left out of conversations about bodily autonomy and reproductive justice?What’s driving the recent surge in attention to menopause?Beyond sexual function, how does menopause affect women's lives?You can check out the Menopunks website to learn more about Alicia's work.Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology.***Thank you to our sponsors! Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today.If you're ready to ditch the shady stuff and choose a libido supplement that’s effective and that you can feel confident about, it's time to check out Soaking Wet. Visit vb.health and use code JUSTIN for 10% off. ***Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram.Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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Episode 528: Your Toughest Sex Questions, Answered
What happens when two people in a long-term relationship have dramatically different sex drives? How do couples navigate intimacy when aging or health problems make sex difficult, or even impossible? And why do some people experience a sudden surge in sexual desire after losing a partner, a phenomenon sometimes referred to as “widow’s fire”? In this episode, we're answering more listener sex questions! My guest is Ashley Weller. She is a Human Sexuality and Health Psychology Professor at Chapman University in Southern California. Ashley also works in mental health clinical research and has more than 15 years of experience in sex education. She also has a podcast called What's Your Position which tackles issues surrounding sexuality, relationships, life, and love from a comedic yet educational point of view.Some of the specific topics we cover include:How can couples navigate differences in sexual values?Can non-monogamy help with desire discrepancies?How do couples successfully adapt when one partner develops a sexual difficulty?Why can grief sometimes increase sexual desire?You can check out Ashley's website to learn more about her work.Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology.***Thank you to our sponsors! If you're ready to ditch the shady stuff and choose a libido supplement that’s effective and that you can feel confident about, it's time to check out Soaking Wet. Visit vb.health and use code JUSTIN for 10% off. The Kinsey Institute is where the world turns to understand sex and relationships. You can help continue its expert-led research by donating to the Kinsey Institute Research Fund. Learn more and make a donation here: https://give.myiu.org/centers-institutes/I380010749.html Attached Therapy offers personalized therapy for individuals and couples navigating infidelity, sexual disconnection, relationship strain, and other complex intimacy concerns. Founder Jason Powell, LMFT and AASECT Certified Sex Therapist, offers in-person sessions in Manhattan and Brooklyn Heights, as well as virtual therapy in multiple states. Learn more at https://www.attachedtherapy.com/***Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram.Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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Episode 527: How Do You Want To Feel During Sex?
When we talk about what we want sexually, we usually describe certain behaviors, positions, or roles. But that's only part of the story. Beneath what we want to do is a deeper question: How do we want to feel during sex? Some want to feel adored. Others want to feel powerful, desired, free, or cared for. These emotional experiences reflect our Core Desires, and understanding them can offer a much richer picture of our sexuality than simply cataloging our preferred bedroom activities.I am joined once again by Dr. Danielle Harel and Celeste Hirschman, the co-creators of the Somatica® Method and co-founders of the Somatica Institute, where they have trained coaches around the world in an experiential approach to sex, relationships, and personal transformation. They are the authors of three books and serve as the lead sexologists and co-executive producers of the UK Channel 4 award-winning series Virgin Island. Some of the specific topics we cover include:What are some examples of Core Desires?How are Core Desires different from our attachment style?Are Core Desires the same thing as sexual fantasies?How can someone figure out their Core Desires?What are some tips for couples looking to explore their Core Desires together?You can visit celesteanddanielle.com to learn more about their work and take their Core Desires quiz at https://somatica.com/quizGot a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology.***Thank you to our sponsors! Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today.Level-up your bedroom skills with Beducated. Featuring more than 150 online courses taught by the experts, Beducated brings pleasure-based sex ed directly into your bedroom. Kick off your journey by taking Beducated’s Quiz to get your personalized roadmap to sexual happiness at https://beduc.at/pd2633-lehmiller***Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram.Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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Episode 526: Why More Adults Are Remaining Virgins
More young adults are delaying their sexual debut, with growing numbers reaching their twenties or even thirties without ever having had sex. At the same time, virginity has become increasingly stigmatized, leaving many people feeling ashamed, isolated, or like they’re falling behind. So what’s driving this shift, and what does it tell us about how sex and dating are changing?My guests are Dr. Danielle Harel and Celeste Hirschman, the co-creators of the Somatica® Method and co-founders of the Somatica Institute, where they have trained coaches around the world in an experiential approach to sex, relationships, and personal transformation. They are the authors of three books and serve as the lead sexologists and co-executive producers of the UK Channel 4 award-winning series Virgin Island. Some of the specific topics we cover include:Why are more young adults delaying their sexual debut?What’s driving the rise in adult virginity?Why did virginity become a social liability?What can the TV series Virgin Island teach everyone about building confidence and seeking more meaningful connections?You can visit celesteanddanielle.com to learn more about their work and take their Core Desires quiz at https://somatica.com/quizGot a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology.***Thank you to our sponsors! Oversized, ultra-plush, and completely built for your best summer days, Cozy Earth’s beach towels will be your new poolside essential. Head to cozyearth.com and use my code JUSTIN for an exclusive 20% off. That’s code JUSTIN for an exclusive 20% off. And if you see a post-purchase survey, mention that you heard about Cozy Earth right here!The Kinsey Institute is where the world turns to understand sex and relationships. You can help continue its expert-led research by donating to the Kinsey Institute Research Fund. Learn more and make a donation here: https://give.myiu.org/centers-institutes/I380010749.html ***Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram.Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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Episode 525: The ADHD Guide To Better Sex (Essential Listen)
Despite how much we hear about ADHD, its impact on our intimate lives is often overlooked. Research suggests that around 40% of adults with ADHD experience at least one form of sexual dysfunction. ADHD can also contribute to frustration, misunderstanding, and conflict in relationships. In today's show, we’re revisiting a classic episode from the archives that takes a closer look at the intersection of ADHD and sex.My guest is Cate Osborn, a certified sex educator, a mental health advocate, and full-time content creator, with ADHD. As a professional table top role-playing game performer, she is passionate about opening conversations about neurodiversity and accessibility in the gaming and BDSM/kink communities.Some of the specific topics we cover include:How is ADHD related to sexual desire?Why is ADHD linked to both premature orgasm and delayed orgasm?How can medications to treat ADHD affect sex?Are there gender differences in how ADHD relates to sexual difficulties?If you find yourself constantly distracted during sex, what can you do about this?You can check out Cate's website to learn more about her work.Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology.***Thank you to our sponsors! Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today.If you're ready to ditch the shady stuff and choose a libido supplement that’s effective and that you can feel confident about, it's time to check out Drive Boost. Visit vb.health and use code JUSTIN for 10% off. ***Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram.Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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Episode 524: Essential Sex Advice For Women
Traditional sex education often skips topics like the clitoris, orgasm, sexual pain, and vaginal health, leaving many women to figure these things out all on their own. In this episode, we cover the sex advice every woman should know. We’ll discuss how to make sex more pleasurable, what to do about sexual pain and difficulty reaching orgasm, what you need to know about vaginal health and hygiene products, and more. My guest is Dr. Rena Malik, a board-certified urologist and sexuality educator. With over 300 million views and 2 million subscribers, her YouTube channel @RenaMalikMD has become a go-to destination for frank, evidence-based discussions of taboo topics. With a prolific portfolio boasting over 80 peer-reviewed publications, she has contributed to advancement and innovation in the field of urology. She is also author of the book The Hard Truth: Everything Men Need to Know for Good Health, Great Sex, and Long Life. Some of the specific topics we cover include:The keys to making intercourse more pleasurable.Why sex hurts—and what you can do about it.What really helps when orgasm is difficult.The truth about vaginal taste, smell, and hygiene.Simple ways to prevent vaginal and urinary infections.You can check out Rena's website to learn more about her work.Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology.***Thank you to our sponsors! If you're ready to ditch the shady stuff and choose a libido supplement that’s effective and that you can feel confident about, it's time to check out Drive Boost. Visit vb.health and use code JUSTIN for 10% off. The Kinsey Institute is where the world turns to understand sex and relationships. You can help continue its expert-led research by donating to the Kinsey Institute Research Fund. Learn more and make a donation here: https://give.myiu.org/centers-institutes/I380010749.html ***Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram.Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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Episode 523: Real Stories of Non-Monogamy
Open relationships, polyamory, and consensual non-monogamy are receiving more attention than ever, yet they’re still surrounded by stereotypes and misconceptions. In her new book, Alyssa Shelasky moves beyond the debate by sharing the real-life stories of people navigating these relationships. In this episode, we explore what draws people to non-monogamy, what these relationships actually look like, and what we can all learn from them.Alyssa Shelasky writes the New York Magazine column Sex Diaries, which was developed into an HBO docuseries with Shelasky producing and starring. She is the author of Apron Anxiety, This Might Be Too Personal, and the new book Sex Diaries: Real Life Stories of Non-Monogamy and Polyamory. Some of the specific topics we explore in this episode include:What do people get wrong about who practices non-monogamy?Why do people open their relationships in the first place?What happens when non-monogamy gets complicated, messy, or doesn’t go as planned?Which real-life stories challenge our biggest assumptions about open relationships?What can monogamous couples learn from people who practice non-monogamy?Check out Alyssa's website to learn more about her work.Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology.***Thank you to our sponsors! Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today.Check out Sex Ed with DB here to listen to an episode we love on your favorite podcast platform! ***Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram.Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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Episode 522: What People’s Sex Diaries Reveal About Modern Intimacy
Most of us only get small glimpses into other people’s sex lives, which can make our own experiences feel more unusual than they really are. But what happens when you spend years hearing the unfiltered truth about people’s desires, insecurities, relationships, and intimate experiences? In this episode, we explore what those stories reveal about modern sex and relationships.My guest is Alyssa Shelasky. Her popular New York Magazine column, Sex Diaries, is widely considered a cultural phenomenon and was developed into an HBO docuseries with Shelasky producing and starring. She is the author of Apron Anxiety, This Might Be Too Personal, and the new book Sex Diaries: Real Life Stories of Non-Monogamy and Polyamory. Some of the specific topics we explore in this episode include:Why are people sometimes more comfortable sharing their deepest sexual secrets with a stranger than with a partner?What do people’s sex stories reveal about the roles sex plays beyond physical pleasure?How have people’s desires, relationships, and intimate lives changed over the years?What has collecting countless intimate stories taught Alyssa about modern intimacy?Check out Alyssa's website to learn more about her work.Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology.***Thank you to our sponsors! Level-up your bedroom skills with Beducated. Featuring more than 150 online courses taught by the experts, Beducated brings pleasure-based sex ed directly into your bedroom. Kick off your journey by taking Beducated’s Quiz to get your personalized roadmap to sexual happiness at https://beduc.at/pd2628-lehmillerThe Kinsey Institute is where the world turns to understand sex and relationships. You can help continue its expert-led research by donating to the Kinsey Institute Research Fund. Learn more and make a donation here: https://give.myiu.org/centers-institutes/I380010749.html ***Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram.Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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Episode 521: An Intimacy Coordinator’s Tips For Better Sex
In the previous episode, we went behind the scenes of film and television to explore how intimacy coordinators help create authentic, safe, and compelling intimate scenes. But the lessons from this profession extend far beyond Hollywood. In this episode, we’re bringing those lessons into the bedroom to explore how they can help us build healthier, hotter, and more connected sex lives. I am joined once again by Laura Desiree, the creative director of SNCTM, a private members-only erotic society known for its immersive events that blend live performance, fantasy, intimacy and consent-driven exploration. She is a Level II certified intimacy coordinator with years of experience in erotic media and sex-positive storytelling. Through her work with SNCTM, Laura curates experiences that are culturally relevant, artistically elevated and rooted in clear boundaries, consent, and discretion. Some of the specific topics we explore in this episode include: How can planning sex create more intimacy and chemistry? What can intimacy coordinators teach us about consent and communication? How can couples communicate their boundaries more effectively? How can people stay present during sex instead of overthinking? What should people know before recreating a favorite movie sex scene? You can check out Laura’s website to learn more about her work. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors! Soaking Wet from VB Health is the world’s first probiotic specifically designed for vaginal and vulva health and wellness. It’s a doctor formulated blend of prebiotics, probiotics, and vitamins specifically designed to restore balance and increase lubrication. Visit vb.health and use code JUSTIN for 10% off. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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Episode 520: How Sex Scenes Really Get Made
Sex scenes have been part of film and television for decades, but the way they’re created has changed dramatically. Today, many productions rely on intimacy coordinators to help choreograph intimate scenes while fostering safety, collaboration, and creativity on set. In this episode, we’re pulling back the curtain on this fascinating profession to explore how intimate scenes are actually made. My guest is Laura Desiree, the creative director of SNCTM, a private members-only erotic society known for its immersive events that blend live performance, fantasy, intimacy and consent-driven exploration. She is a Level II certified intimacy coordinator with years of experience in erotic media and sex-positive storytelling. Through her work with SNCTM, Laura curates experiences that are culturally relevant, artistically elevated and rooted in clear boundaries, consent, and discretion. Some of the specific topics we explore in this episode include: How did intimacy coordinators become part of film and television? What does an intimacy coordinator do from pre-production to filming? Why can choreographed intimacy create better chemistry? What kinds of scenes require an intimacy coordinator? What qualifies someone to work as an intimacy coordinator? You can check out Laura’s website to learn more about her work. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors! Soaking Wet from VB Health is the world’s first probiotic specifically designed for vaginal and vulva health and wellness. It’s a doctor formulated blend of prebiotics, probiotics, and vitamins specifically designed to restore balance and increase lubrication. Visit vb.health and use code JUSTIN for 10% off. Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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Episode 519: How To Revive A Dead Bedroom
In the previous episode, we explored why dead bedrooms happen and just how common they are. Today, we’re shifting from understanding the problem to finding solutions, with practical, evidence-based strategies for rebuilding intimacy, navigating desire discrepancies, and improving sexual communication. If you’re hoping to reconnect with your partner, this episode is for you. I am joined once again by Dr. Lauren Fogel Mersy, a licensed psychologist, AASECT-certified sex therapist, and certified emotionally focused couples therapist. She specializes in sexual health and relationships and owns a private practice in Minnesota. She is the co-author of the book, Desire: An Inclusive Guide to Navigating Libido Differences in Relationships. Some of the specific topics we explore in this episode include: How can couples move forward when only one partner is dissatisfied with their sex life? Are there topics couples should avoid when discussing desire discrepancies? How can understanding responsive desire help couples reconnect sexually? Why might taking sex off the table temporarily help revive a dead bedroom? How can couples make scheduled intimacy feel exciting instead of obligatory? You can check our Lauren’s website to learn more about her work. You can also find her on Instagram and Facebook @drlaurenfogelmersy. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors! Breathable, soft, and built for summer, check out Cozy Earth’s bamboo sheet set and beach towels. Head to cozyearth.com and use my code JUSTIN for an exclusive 20% off. If you’re looking to gain a broad understanding of human sexuality or refresh your knowledge, check out the upcoming Human Sexuality Intensive courses at the Kinsey Institute: https://kinseyinstitute.org/learning/human-sexuality-intensive.html *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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475
Episode 518: Why Dead Bedrooms Happen
In long-term relationships, couples sometimes find that their sex life gradually fades away. This might happen after having children, or following a stressful period at work. However, there isn’t always an obvious turning point. In today’s episode, we’re taking a closer look at why dead bedrooms happen, how common they are, and how to know when it’s time to seek help. My guest is Dr. Lauren Fogel Mersy, a licensed psychologist, AASECT-certified sex therapist, and certified emotionally focused couples therapist. She specializes in sexual health and relationships and owns a private practice in Minnesota. She is the co-author of the book, Desire: An Inclusive Guide to Navigating Libido Differences in Relationships. Some of the specific topics we explore in this episode include: What do dead bedrooms actually look like? Why might sex disappear in a long-term relationship? How common are desire discrepancies in relationships? How do we distinguish the normal waning of passion from a true sexual problem? When should couples seek help for desire discrepancies? You can check our Lauren’s website to learn more about her work. You can also find her on Instagram and Facebook @drlaurenfogelmersy. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors! Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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474
Episode 517: The Business Of Artificial Intimacy
People are increasingly turning to AI for companionship. But behind every AI companion is a company that owns the technology, collects the data, and programs how these relationship work. So what happens when corporations become intermediaries in our most intimate relationships? In this episode, we’re diving into the ethics, risks, and future of AI intimacy. I am joined once again by Bridget Todd, an award-winning creator, host, and producer. She hosts the critically acclaimed podcast There Are No Girls on the Internet, and Mozilla’s award-winning podcast IRL: Online Life is Real Life. Bridget is a Technology in the Public Interest Fellow at the MacArthur Foundation and an affiliate at Harvard University’s Berkman Klein Center for Internet & Society. She is also author of the new audiobook Love at First Prompt. Some of the specific topics we explore in this episode include: What makes the business model behind AI companions so concerning? What risks arise when a corporation mediates an intimate relationship? How do consent and autonomy differ in AI relationships versus human ones? What should users know about privacy when interacting with AI? Does AI companionship reduce loneliness, or make it worse? You can find Bridget on her website and on Instagram @bridgetmarieindc, and you can check out Love at First Prompt here. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors! Load Boost is a supplement designed to improve the taste, volume, and overall health of your semen. If you want to elevate your sexual performance, check out Load Boost from VB Health. Visit vb.health to learn more and save 10% with code JUSTIN. If you’re looking to gain a broad understanding of human sexuality or refresh your knowledge, check out the upcoming Human Sexuality Intensive courses at the Kinsey Institute: https://kinseyinstitute.org/learning/human-sexuality-intensive.html *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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473
Episode 516: The Rise Of AI Companionship
When people hear about someone falling in love with an AI companion, their first reaction is often disbelief. But as AI becomes woven into everyday life, more people are turning to it not just for information, but also for companionship, emotional support, friendship, and even intimacy. So what draws people into these relationships, and what can they teach us about human connection? My guest is Bridget Todd, an award-winning creator, host, and producer. She hosts the critically acclaimed podcast There Are No Girls on the Internet, and Mozilla’s award-winning podcast IRL: Online Life is Real Life. Bridget is a Technology in the Public Interest Fellow at the MacArthur Foundation and an affiliate at Harvard University’s Berkman Klein Center for Internet & Society. She is also author of the new audiobook Love at First Prompt. Some of the specific topics we explore in this episode include: What needs are people trying to meet through AI companionship? Why has eroticism become such a central use of artificial intelligence? How does AI’s constant validation shape these relationships? What benefits do people report from AI companions? What does the rise of AI companionship reveal about modern dating? You can learn more about Bridget on her website and on Instagram @bridgetmarieindc, and you can check out Love at First Prompt here. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors! Breathable, soft, and built for summer, check out Cozy Earth’s bamboo sheet set and beach towels. Head to cozyearth.com and use my code JUSTIN for an exclusive 20% off. Load Boost is a supplement designed to improve the taste, volume, and overall health of your semen. If you want to elevate your sexual performance, check out Load Boost from VB Health. Visit vb.health to learn more and save 10% with code JUSTIN. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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472
Episode 515: Why We Disagree About Consent
One person sees coercion. Another sees miscommunication. Two people can watch the exact same scene and walk away with completely different interpretations. So why do stories about consent generate so much disagreement? In this episode, we’re exploring what film and television reveal about our cultural understanding of consent. I am joined once again by Michele Meek, Ph.D. an author, filmmaker, and professor who has published several books including The Ambiguity of Consent: Consent Puzzles in Film, Television, Public Discourse, and the Law and Consent Culture and Teen Films: Adolescent Sexuality in US Movies. She is a tenured Associate Professor of Communication at Bridgewater State University in Massachusetts. Some of the specific topics we explore in this episode include: How does popular culture shape the way we think about consent? What gets lost when we force complicated sexual situations into simple narratives? Why does society apply different standards of consent in different contexts? How can we introduce more nuance into our conversations about consent? You can visit Michele’s website to learn more about her work. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors! If you’re looking to gain a broad understanding of human sexuality or refresh your knowledge, check out the upcoming Human Sexuality Intensive courses at the Kinsey Institute: https://kinseyinstitute.org/learning/human-sexuality-intensive.html Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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471
Episode 514: The Ambiguity of Consent
Is consent alone enough to tell us whether a sexual experience was ethical, healthy, and/or mutually fulfilling? In this episode, we’re exploring the difference between consent and desire, why affirmative consent frameworks sometimes fall short, and what it means to think beyond consent when it comes to sexual ethics. My guest is Michele Meek, Ph.D. an author, filmmaker, and professor who has published several books including The Ambiguity of Consent: Consent Puzzles in Film, Television, Public Discourse, and the Law and Consent Culture and Teen Films: Adolescent Sexuality in US Movies. She is a tenured Associate Professor of Communication at Bridgewater State University in Massachusetts. Some of the specific topics we explore in this episode include: How can we acknowledge the ambiguity of consent without minimizing harm? Where do affirmative consent frameworks succeed, and where do they fall short? Why do people sometimes consent to sex they don’t genuinely want? What do we owe each other beyond consent? You can visit Michele’s website to learn more about her work. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors! Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today. Check out Sex Ed with DB here to listen to an episode we love on your favorite podcast platform! *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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470
Episode 513: Inside The World Of Chastity Play
In this episode, we’re diving into the many ways that people incorporate chastity into their intimate lives. As we’ll discuss, you don’t neccessarily need a partner or even a chastity cage to explore it. We’ll look at the many different roles chastity can play, from solo exploration and relationship dynamics to gender affirmation and self-discipline. I am joined once again by Paul Botto, the COO of KINK3D. He’s been working in the queer and kink community in San Francisco for the past 10 years, joining KINK3D in 2021 as the company’s first hire. Some of the specific topics we explore in this episode include: Why might someone practice chastity on their own? How can chastity serve as a form of gender affirmation? How can chastity communicate sexual interests and boundaries? What does chastity symbolize in intimate relationships? Where should beginners start with chastity? You can check out the KINK3D blog here, as well as find them on Instagram, Twitter, Bluesky, and Reddit. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors! If you’re looking to gain a broad understanding of human sexuality or refresh your knowledge, check out the upcoming Human Sexuality Intensive courses at the Kinsey Institute: https://kinseyinstitute.org/learning/human-sexuality-intensive.html *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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469
Episode 512: Why Chastity Turns People On
Historically, chastity was associated with suppressing sexual desire. Today, however, it often means something very different. For many people, it’s a way of exploring desire, anticipation, control, intimacy, and pleasure. In this episode, we’re diving into the psychology of chastity, including why people are drawn to it, who’s into it, and what it can teach us about human sexuality more broadly. My guest is Paul Botto, the COO of KINK3D. He’s been working in the queer and kink community in San Francisco for the past 10 years, joining KINK3D in 2021 as the company’s first hire. Some of the specific topics we explore in this episode include: What does chastity mean in modern sexual culture? How has the meaning of chastity changed over time? What do people find psychologically appealing about chastity? Why can limiting pleasure intensify desire? Why are some people drawn to chastity outside of kink? You can check out the KINK3D blog here, as well as find them on Instagram, Twitter, Bluesky, and Reddit. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors! Check out Sex Ed with DB here to listen to an episode we love on your favorite podcast platform! Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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468
Episode 511: The Five Dimensions Of Sexual Desire
Why do some people need emotional connection to feel desire, while others are more responsive to novelty, touch, or fantasy? And why can the exact same sexual experience feel exciting one day and flat the next? In this episode, we explore the five dimensions of desire and how understanding your arousal architecture can transform your sex life. I am joined once again by Kayna Cassard, a sex therapist, painful sex specialist, certified trauma therapist, and author of the book Arousal, Answered: An Expert’s Guide to Authentic Pleasure and Liberating Sex. Her mission is to help others liberate themselves from outdated sexual scripts and empower them to rewrite their authentic sexual narratives. Some of the specific topics we explore in this episode include: What is the Arousal Architecture, and what does it reveal about desire? How do the five dimensions of arousal shape sexual desire? How can arousal needs shift across relationships and situations? How can understanding your arousal architecture improve your sex life? How do we separate what genuinely turns us on from what we think should turn us on? You can visit Kayna’s website to learn more about her work. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors! If you’re ready to ditch the shady stuff and choose a libido supplement that’s effective and that you can feel confident about, it’s time to check out Drive Boost. Visit vb.health and use code JUSTIN for 10% off. If you’re looking to gain a broad understanding of human sexuality or refresh your knowledge, check out the upcoming Human Sexuality Intensive courses at the Kinsey Institute: https://kinseyinstitute.org/learning/human-sexuality-intensive.html *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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467
Episode 510: The Science Of Sexual Arousal
A lot of people think that if you’re attracted to someone, arousal should just naturally happen. But it’s not that simple. In this episode, we explore the science of sexual arousal, the many pathways through which desire can emerge, and how stress, trauma, burnout, and major life experiences can reshape our relationship with pleasure. My guest is Kayna Cassard, a sex therapist, painful sex specialist, certified trauma therapist, and author of the book Arousal, Answered: An Expert’s Guide to Authentic Pleasure and Liberating Sex. Her mission is to help others liberate themselves from outdated sexual scripts and empower them to rewrite their authentic sexual narratives. Some of the specific topics we explore in this episode include: How can understanding the brain unlock more pleasure? Why is desire more complex than spontaneous vs. responsive? What role do stress, safety, and connection play in arousal? Why is it so hard to stay present during sex? How can becoming more embodied enhance desire? You can visit Kayna’s website to learn more about her work. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors! If you’re ready to ditch the shady stuff and choose a libido supplement that’s effective and that you can feel confident about, it’s time to check out Drive Boost. Visit vb.health and use code JUSTIN for 10% off. Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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466
Episode 509: Out-Of-Control Sexual Behavior In Women
When people hear about “out-of-control” sexual behavior, they tend to think of men. But women can struggle with it too, and their experiences have often been overlooked or misunderstood because most of the research and treatment models were built around male experiences. Today, we’re exploring the psychology of out-of-control sexual behavior in women, and what people often get wrong about it. I am joined once again by Jess Levith, a licensed marriage and family therapist and AASECT certified sex therapist. She’s fully trained in both attachment-focused EMDR therapy and trauma-focused acceptance and commitment therapy, works with LGBTQQIA+ and kinky folks, consensual non-monogamy, women’s sexual health, and out-of-control sexual behavior. Some of the specific topics we explore in this episode include: What do we misunderstand about women’s experiences with problematic sexual behavior? How do you distinguish between a high sex drive and sexual behavior that truly feels out of control? How do clinicians separate genuine sexual dysregulation from sexual shame? How does out-of-control sexual behavior differ in women and men? If someone feels their sexual behavior is out of control, where should they start in seeking help? You can follow Jess on Instagram to stay updated about her work. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors! Level-up your bedroom skills with Beducated. Featuring more than 150 online courses taught by the experts, Beducated brings pleasure-based sex ed directly into your bedroom. Kick off your journey by taking Beducated’s Quiz to get your personalized roadmap to sexual happiness at https://beduc.at/pd2624-lehmiller *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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465
Episode 508: When Your Sexuality Changes Later In Life
Most people think sexuality is something we figure out early in life. But for many people, major realizations about their sexuality don’t happen until much later, sometimes after decades in heterosexual relationships or marriages. Today, we’re exploring the psychology of coming out later in life and what happens when you discover aspects of your sexuality you never fully understood before. My guest is Jess Levith, a licensed marriage and family therapist and AASECT certified sex therapist. She’s fully trained in both attachment-focused EMDR therapy and trauma-focused acceptance and commitment therapy, works with LGBTQ+ and kinky folks, consensual non-monogamy, women’s sexual health, and out-of-control sexual behavior. Some of the specific topics we explore in this episode include: Why might someone not fully understand their sexuality until later in adulthood? Is coming out later in life always about repression, or can something else be happening? What is sexual emergence, and how does it differ from coming out? How can people approach conversations about changing sexuality with long-term partners in honest, compassionate ways? You can follow Jess on Instagram to stay updated about her work. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors! Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today. If you’re looking to gain a broad understanding of human sexuality or refresh your knowledge, check out the upcoming Human Sexuality Intensive courses at the Kinsey Institute: https://kinseyinstitute.org/learning/human-sexuality-intensive.html *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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464
Episode 507: Is Non-Monogamy Right For You?
A lot of people are curious about non-monogamy. But there’s a big difference between liking the idea of it and knowing whether it genuinely fits your emotional needs, attachment style, and relationship temperament. So how do you know if non-monogamy is right for you? That’s what we’re exploring in this episode. I am joined once again by Kate Loree, LMFT, a sex-positive psychotherapist, author, and speaker specializing in trauma, relationships, sexuality, and non-traditional relationship structures. She is the author of Open Deeply: A Guide to Building Conscious, Compassionate Open Relationships. She also co-hosts the Open Deeply podcast with Sunny Megatron. Some of the specific topics we explore include: How can you tell whether you genuinely want non-monogamy or simply like the idea of it? What are signs you may be overriding yourself to make non-monogamy work? How can you assess whether non-monogamy is a good fit for you? How can you safely and honestly explore the relationship style that fits you best? Learn more about Kate’s work by visiting her website. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors! Soaking Wet from VB Health is the world’s first probiotic specifically designed for vaginal and vulva health and wellness. It’s a doctor formulated blend of prebiotics, probiotics, and vitamins specifically designed to restore balance and increase lubrication. Visit vb.health and use code JUSTIN for 10% off. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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463
Episode 506: Trauma-Informed Non-Monogamy
People often think successful non-monogamy comes down to communication, boundaries, and relationship agreements. But underneath those conversations are deeper psychological dynamics involving attachment, emotional safety, and nervous system regulation. In today’s episode, we’re exploring what it means to approach consensual non-monogamy through a trauma-informed lens. My guest is Kate Loree, LMFT, a sex-positive psychotherapist, author, and speaker specializing in trauma, relationships, sexuality, and non-traditional relationship structures. She is the author of Open Deeply: A Guide to Building Conscious, Compassionate Open Relationships. She also co-hosts the Open Deeply podcast with Sunny Megatron. Some of the specific topics we explore in this episode include: What does “trauma-informed non-monogamy” actually mean? What are signs someone may be consenting without truly feeling grounded internally? How can somatic tracking help us better understand our intuitions? How can jealousy be reframed as a source of curiosity rather than anxiety? How can people assess whether they’re emotionally ready for consensual non-monogamy? Learn more about Kate’s work by visiting her website. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors! Soaking Wet from VB Health is the world’s first probiotic specifically designed for vaginal and vulva health and wellness. It’s a doctor formulated blend of prebiotics, probiotics, and vitamins specifically designed to restore balance and increase lubrication. Visit vb.health and use code JUSTIN for 10% off. If you’re looking to gain a broad understanding of human sexuality or refresh your knowledge, check out the upcoming Human Sexuality Intensive courses at the Kinsey Institute: https://kinseyinstitute.org/learning/human-sexuality-intensive.html *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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462
Episode 505: How To Move Beyond Small Talk
Most people say they want deeper relationships and more meaningful connection, yet many conversations stay stuck at the surface level. We talk about work, schedules, the weather, or whatever else feels safe. So why is it so hard to move beyond small talk? In this episode, we’re exploring the science of meaningful conversation, from curiosity and attention to vulnerability, flirting, and emotional openness. I am joined once again by Nicholas Epley, the John Templeton Keller Distinguished Service Professor of Behavior Science, and Director of the Roman Family Center for Decision Research, at the University of Chicago Booth School of Business. He is the author of Mindwise: How We Understand What Others Think, Believe, Feel, and Want. His latest book is A Little More Social: How Small Choices Create Unexpected Happiness, Health, and Connection. Some of the specific topics we explore in this episode include: Why do so many conversations stay surface-level? What kinds of questions foster closeness? How do we balance vulnerability with oversharing? Can people tell when they don’t fully have our attention? What small conversational shifts create deeper connection? You can visit Nicholas’ website to learn more about his work. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors! Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today.*** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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461
Episode 504: Why We Avoid Connection (Even When We Crave It)
We live in a world where people are more digitally connected than ever, yet loneliness remains incredibly common. Most of us move through daily life surrounded by strangers while following an unspoken rule: don’t engage. In this episode, we’re exploring why humans are so socially cautious, but also why even brief conversations with strangers can meaningfully improve our happiness, health, and sense of connection. My guest is Nicholas Epley, the John Templeton Keller Distinguished Service Professor of Behavior Science, and Director of the Roman Family Center for Decision Research, at the University of Chicago Booth School of Business. He is the author of Mindwise: How We Understand What Others Think, Believe, Feel, and Want. His latest book is A Little More Social: How Small Choices Create Unexpected Happiness, Health, and Connection. Some of the specific topics we explore in this episode include: Why are conversations with strangers usually better than we expect? Do people really want to be left alone in public? Why do small moments of connection matter so much? How has technology changed everyday social interaction? For people who want to be a little more social, what’s a good starting point? You can visit Nicholas’ website to learn more about his work. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors! This spring, give yourself the kind of comfort that lives with you all day — not just the moment you get home. Head to cozyearth.com and use my code JUSTIN for an exclusive 20% off. If you’re looking for a dating experience where you can explore on your own terms, check out Feeld, a dating app for the curious. Go to feeld.co or download Feeld on the App Store or Google Play. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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460
Episode 503: Why Sexual Communication Feels So Hard
A lot of couples struggle to talk about sex because those conversations can feel incredibly vulnerable. And if the topic comes up at all, it’s often only when there’s a problem in the bedroom, which makes every discussion feel loaded with pressure, shame, defensiveness, or fear of rejection. In today’s episode, we’ll discuss how couples can communicate about intimacy in healthier and more productive ways. I am joined once again by Michelle Fischler, an ASTO Certified Sex Therapist with over a decade of clinical experience. She is also the founder of GETSOME, a platform and podcast dedicated to dissolving sexual shame. Her new book is titled Coming Soon: The Unshaming Guide to Early Ejaculation and Lasting Longer. Some of the specific topics we explore include: Why do conversations about sex feel so vulnerable? How can couples make talking about sex feel less high-stakes? How does shame complicate sexual communication? What mistakes do couples make when discussing intimacy problems? What helps partners feel safer talking about sex? You can check out Michelle’s website to learn more about her work and follow her on the socials at @getsome_podcast Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors! Load Boost is a supplement designed to improve the taste, volume, and overall health of your semen. If you want to elevate your sexual performance, check out Load Boost from VB Health. Visit vb.health to learn more and save 10% with code JUSTIN. The Kinsey Institute is where the world turns to understand sex and relationships. You can help continue its expert-led research by donating to the Kinsey Institute Research Fund. Learn more and make a donation here: https://give.myiu.org/centers-institutes/I380010749.html *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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459
Episode 502: Rethinking Premature Ejaculation
When people talk about premature ejaculation, the conversation is usually framed around performance: lasting longer, gaining control, or somehow “fixing” the problem. But what if we’ve been thinking about this issue all wrong? In today’s episode, we explore a different way of understanding early ejaculation that’s less rooted less in performance and more in the nervous system, anxiety, shame, and body awareness. My guest is Michelle Fischler, an ASTO Certified Sex Therapist with over a decade of clinical experience. She is also the founder of GETSOME, a platform and podcast dedicated to dissolving sexual shame. Her new book is titled Coming Soon: The Unshaming Guide to Early Ejaculation and Lasting Longer. Some of the specific topics we explore in this episode include: What counts as early ejaculation? Why isn’t early ejaculation just a performance problem? How can breath help regulate arousal? What can solo practice teach us about arousal and pleasure? How can couples approach early ejaculation as a team? You can check out Michelle’s website to learn more about her work and follow her on the socials at @getsome_podcast Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors! If you’re looking for a dating experience where you can explore on your own terms, check out Feeld, a dating app for the curious. Go to feeld.co or download Feeld on the App Store or Google Play. Load Boost is a supplement designed to improve the taste, volume, and overall health of your semen. If you want to elevate your sexual performance, check out Load Boost from VB Health. Visit vb.health to learn more and save 10% with code JUSTIN. Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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458
Episode 501: Masturbation Myths and the Science of Self-Pleasure
To celebrate Masturbation Month, we’re sharing a compilation of clips about self-pleasure. Masturbation Month traces back to 1995, when U.S. Surgeon General Joycelyn Elders stated that masturbation is a natural part of human sexuality and should perhaps be included in sex education. The political backlash ultimately led to her firing, and May 14 was later declared National Masturbation Day in her honor—a movement that eventually expanded into Masturbation Month. In this episode, we’re exploring the history and science of self-pleasure. Featured guests include Dr. Eric Sprankle, Marie Aoyama from TENGA, professor Carole Hooven, urologist Joshua Gonzalez, sleep researcher Michele Lastella, and sex therapist Emily Jamea. Some of the specific topics we address include: How have attitudes toward masturbation changed over time? What do people fantasize about during masturbation? Does avoiding sex and masturbation boost athletic performance? How can we build a healthier relationship with self-pleasure? Can masturbation help you fall asleep faster? Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors! Level-up your bedroom skills with Beducated. Featuring more than 150 online courses taught by the experts, Beducated brings pleasure-based sex ed directly into your bedroom. Kick off your journey by taking Beducated’s Quiz to get your personalized roadmap to sexual happiness at https://beduc.at/pd2620-lehmiller Why do we love who we love? Why do some relationships thrive while others fall apart? In The Intimate Animal, Dr. Justin Garcia explores the science of attraction, intimacy, and love by blending cutting-edge research with real-world insight. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest. Vibrator photo by IFONNX Toys on Unsplash.
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457
Episode 500: How To Have Amazing Sex (Essential Listen)
Most of us know the basics of sex, but having truly great sex is another story. Today, we’re revisiting one of my favorite conversations from the archives about increasing sexual pleasure, deepening intimacy, and making sex more satisfying for everyone involved. My guest is Dr. Emily Jamea, an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist and author of the book Anatomy of Desire: 5 Secrets to Lasting Intimacy. Some of the topics we explore include: How can changing up your masturbation routine enhance pleasure and partnered sex? What are some tips for better oral sex? How can you make intercourse and anal sex more pleasurable? What increases the odds of mutual orgasm? Why is it important to step outside your sexual comfort zone sometimes? To learn more about Emily, visit her website at emilyjamea.com. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors! If you’re looking for a dating experience where you can explore on your own terms, check out Feeld, a dating app for the curious. Go to feeld.co or download Feeld on the App Store or Google Play. This spring, give yourself the kind of comfort that lives with you all day — not just the moment you get home. Head to cozyearth.com and use my code JUSTIN for an exclusive 20% off. Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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456
Episode 499: Navigating Love and Relationships After Trauma
In the last episode, we explored how trauma shapes our relationships, intimacy, and emotional patterns. But the bigger question is: what do we do with that insight, and how do we start building healthier ways of connecting? Today, we’re talking about healing, supportive partnership, and what moving forward can actually look like after trauma. I am joined once again by Dr. Heather MacIntosh, a psychoanalyst and clinical psychologist, Associate Professor, and Director of the Couple and Family Therapy Clinic at McGill University. She is author of the books Healing Broken Bonds: A Couples Workbook for Complex Trauma and Developmental Couple Therapy for Complex Trauma: a Manual for Therapists. She also hosts the podcast Healing Broken Bonds. Some of the specific topics we explore in this episode include: How can relationships become a space for healing after trauma? What are the first steps to addressing trauma in a healthy way? How do you talk about trauma with a partner? What does it mean to truly support a partner with a trauma history? How can couples rebuild safety, intimacy, and pleasure after trauma? You can visit Heather’s website to learn more about her work. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors! If you’re ready to ditch the shady stuff and choose a libido supplement that’s effective and that you can feel confident about, it’s time to check out Drive Boost. Visit vb.health and use code JUSTIN for 10% off. If you’re looking to gain a broad understanding of human sexuality or refresh your knowledge, check out the upcoming Human Sexuality Intensive courses at the Kinsey Institute: https://kinseyinstitute.org/learning/human-sexuality-intensive.html *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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455
Episode 498: The Hidden Ways Trauma Shows Up In Relationships
“Trauma” is a word you hear everywhere today, from social media to conversations about dating and relationships. But in psychology, it has a more precise meaning, and understanding it can help explain the patterns we see in how we think, feel, and connect. In this episode, we explore how trauma shows up in our relationships and sex lives. My guest is Dr. Heather MacIntosh, a psychoanalyst and clinical psychologist, Associate Professor, and Director of the Couple and Family Therapy Clinic at McGill University. She is author of the books Healing Broken Bonds: A Couples Workbook for Complex Trauma and Developmental Couple Therapy for Complex Trauma: a Manual for Therapists. She also hosts the podcast Healing Broken Bonds. Some of the specific topics we explore in this episode include: What does trauma mean in a clinical sense? What happens in the brain and body when someone experiences trauma? How does trauma show up in our intimate lives and relationships? Why doesn’t trauma affect everyone the same way? How can trauma affect sexual arousal and desire? You can visit Heather’s website to learn more about her work. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors! If you’re looking for a dating experience where you can explore on your own terms, check out Feeld, a dating app for the curious. Go to feeld.co or download Feeld on the App Store or Google Play. If you’re ready to ditch the shady stuff and choose a libido supplement that’s effective and that you can feel confident about, it’s time to check out Drive Boost. Visit vb.health and use code JUSTIN for 10% off. Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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454
Episode 497: Inside The World Of Breast Implants And Chest Surgery
More cosmetic surgeries are performed on the chest than almost anywhere else on the body, with breast implants leading the way. Not long ago, “bigger is better” defined the ideal, but we’re seeing a shift toward smaller, more natural results. So what’s driving that change? Today, we’re diving into the world of chest surgery, and what it reveals about beauty, power, and the making of the “ideal” breast. I am joined once again by Sarah Thornton, a sociologist, non-fiction writer, and author of four critically acclaimed books. Thornton’s most widely read book is Seven Days in the Art World, which is translated into over 20 languages. Her latest is titled, Tits Up: The Top Half of Women’s Liberation, which explores the significance of breasts across radically different social worlds. Some of the specific topics we explore include: How common are breast implants today? How have aesthetic goals shifted over time? What shapes patient preferences in augmentation? Are there cross-cultural differences in breast augmentation? How do augmentation, reconstruction, and reduction differ in purpose and meaning? Check out Sarah’s website to learn more about her work. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors! If you’re looking to gain a broad understanding of human sexuality or refresh your knowledge, check out the upcoming Human Sexuality Intensive courses at the Kinsey Institute: https://kinseyinstitute.org/learning/human-sexuality-intensive.html *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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ABOUT THIS SHOW
The Sex and Psychology Podcast is the sex ed you never got in school—and won’t find anywhere else. Kinsey Institute researcher Dr. Justin Lehmiller takes you on a journey through the psychology of sex and relationships, offering practical tips along the way that can help you take your intimate life to the next level. Learn more on Dr. Lehmiller’s blog at sexandpsychology.com
HOSTED BY
Dr. Justin Lehmiller
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