The AuDHD Psych Podcast

Send us Fan Mail🎙️ Episode 29 — Work, Burnout & Ableism: Why So Many of Us Aren't EmployedEpisode SummaryIf we are different and not defective, why are so many of us unemployed, underemployed, or exhausted at work? In this episode, Aaron Howearth (Clinical Psychologist) works through the employment gap for neurodivergent people — and makes the case that it is structural, not a matter of effort or willingness.We start with the numbers. Around three in ten autistic adults are employed in UK research, roughly half in Australia, and in the Netherlands the most common employment trajectory across thousands of autistic people was long-term unemployment. ADHD sits differently in the data, with productivity loss, injury, and time off carrying much of the cost. What ties it together is a person-environment mismatch — and the uncomfortable finding that most interventions still try to change the person rather than the workplace, even though environmental change is what actually shifts employment outcomes.From there we get into burnout as a mechanism. We work through what autistic burnout actually is — chronic exhaustion, skills loss, reduced tolerance for sensory and cognitive demands, nonlinear and often long-term — how it must be differentiated from depression, anxiety, trauma responses and personality differences without excluding them, and why the withdrawal looks different (recovery, not amotivation). We are careful with masking: it is associated with burnout and likely a leading mechanism, but the causal evidence isn't there yet. We also name the thin ground honestly — ADHD burnout is a clinical and community idea without a defining study, and AuDHD burnout has almost no academic literature at all.Then we turn upstream to ableism: the assumption that able-bodied and typical means right, normal, and appropriate, and that anything else is deficient. That shows up bluntly (employers who say they would not hire an autistic person under any circumstances) and subtly (be quiet, slow down, be more cheerful) — and both feed masking, stress, and burnout. We extend the double empathy problem to triple empathy in professional settings, where the mismatch is with colleagues and managers too, not just clients. Finally, we get practical: what accommodations actually cost, why everyone already uses accommodations, what to ask for, and how to plan recovery before you run out of spoons.In This Episode (Chapters)(00:00) Different, not defective — so why aren't so many of us employed?(01:00) The employment gap is real and structural: UK, Australia, US, Netherlands(03:30) ADHD and work: productivity loss, injury, and time off(04:30) Barriers are structural, not effort-related(05:30) Why interventions change the person instead of the environment(07:00) Autistic burnout: Raymaker, Higgins, and what it actually looks like(09:00) Differentiating burnout from depression, anxiety and trauma responses(10:30) Why late diagnosis changes the presentation(11:30) Masking and burnout: associated, not proven causal(13:30) Recovery withdrawal vs depressive withdrawal(15:00) ADHD burnout: a clinical idea without a defining study(16:00) AuDHD burnout: almost no evidence base at all(17:00) Who is most at risk: gender, and co-occurring conditions(18:00) What ableism is, and why it drives everything upstream(20:00) Over half of employers say they wouldn't hire an autistic person(21:30) The subtle version: "be quiet", "slow down", "be more cheerful"(24:00) Minority stress, cumulative feedback, and why our masking is safety-related(26:00) Double empathy at work — and the triple empathy problem for professionals(28:30) "Why should you get accommodations?" — the stairs and the lift(30:00) What accommodations actually cost: mostly free, average around USD $300(31:30) Practical accommodations: headphones, quiet spaces, breaks, stimming, routine(33:30) Supported work models and work-person fit(35:30) Disclosure: entirely your call, and how to open the conversation(37:30) What employers can do to make disclosure less frightening(38:30) Planning recovery before you run out of spoons — closing reflectionKey TakeawaysThe employment gap is structural, not motivational. Roughly three in ten autistic adults are employed in UK research, about half in Australia, and long-term unemployment was the most common trajectory in a large Netherlands study. Nobody is sitting at home deciding they can't be bothered.ADHD shows up differently in the data — around 21 to 22 extra days of lost productive work a year, plus higher rates of injury and time off — rather than as outright exclusion.Most employment interventions try to change the person. The research points the other way: changing the work environment substantially increases neurodivergent employment.Autistic burnout is chronic exhaustion, skills loss, and reduced tolerance for sensory, social and cognitive demands, arising from unsupported person-environment mismatch. It is debilitating, nonlinear, and often long-term with spikes.It must be differentiated from depression, anxiety, trauma responses and personality differences — but the presence of those does not exclude autism, ADHD or AuDHD. Burnout withdrawal is recovery-seeking; depressive withdrawal is amotivation and hopelessness.Masking is associated with burnout and is likely a leading mechanism, but the causal evidence is not there yet. It's said plainly in the episode: the relationship is real, the causal claim isn't earned.ADHD burnout is an idea in clinical, community and advocacy circles without a defining study, and AuDHD burnout has almost no academic literature. That gap is named rather than papered over.Ableism is the upstream driver: the assumption that typical ability is right and normal, and difference is deficient. Over half of employers in one study said they would not employ an autistic person under any circumstances.The subtle version does the quiet damage — "be quiet", "slow down", be more expressive, be more cheerful — accumulating as minority stress, which drives masking, which drives burnout.Double empathy extends into the workplace as triple empathy: research on young GPs found communication difficulty with colleagues and managers, not only with clients.Everyone already uses accommodations. Stairs, lifts and escalators are accommodations for capacities humans don't have. We are just further from the middle of the human road, so we need a few more.Accommodations are cheap — most are free, averaging around USD $300 — and quiet spaces, headphones, redistributed breaks, permitted stimming, clear routines and flexible or online work all support engagement.Neurodiversity-affirming does not mean nobody has support needs. Some of us need considerably more support than others, and that has to stay visible.Disclosure is entirely personal and case by case. Where it feels safe, framing it as a shared problem to solve makes it a win for both sides — and employers can make those conversations normal so disclosure stops being frightening.Plan recovery before you need it. Build restoration into the day, week or month rather than waiting until the spoons are gone.A Note on the EvidenceToday's discussion draws on a mix of peer-reviewed research (strongest for autistic employment outcomes, autistic burnout, and accommodations), thinner and largely non-definitive material on ADHD burnout, and clinical and lived-experience observation where the literature does not yet reach — particularly for AuDHD burnout, where academic evidence is close to absent. Where a claim is associational rather than causal, or clinical rather than trial-based, that's named clearly in the episode.DisclaimerThis episode is general educational and advocacy information only. It is not individualised or tailored therapy, assessment, advice, or employment or legal guidance. If you need support, please speak with your GP or a registered practitioner in your area.Thanks for listening, and remember — we are different, not defective.Support the showKeywords: AuDHD podcast, autism and ADHD, neurodivergent psychologist, neurodiversity affirming, Howearth Psychology, queer psychologist, autism diagnosis, ADHD awareness, lived experience, neurodivergent mental health, clinical psychology podcast

Send us Fan Mail 🎙️ Ep 28 — Relationships: Friendship, Loneliness & Intimacy Across Neurotypes"It's not meeting my needs. It's not meeting your needs. It's meeting our needs in the best balance for us"⚠️ Content note: this episode includes brief discussion of trauma, including sexual trauma.If we're different and not defective, why do so many of us find relationships hard? In this episode, Aaron Howearth (Clinical Psychologist) sits with that question and works through friendship, loneliness, and intimacy across neurotypes — not as evidence of a deficit inside us, but as something that lives in the space between us and the people we're trying to connect with.We start with what the research bears out: on average, autistic people report being lonelier and having fewer, lower-quality friendships — though this varies enormously from person to person, and many of us genuinely prefer smaller, higher-quality networks. From there we get into the double empathy problem: the idea that communication difficulties aren't a one-sided skills deficit, but a two-way mismatch, like speaking the same language in a slightly different dialect. When neurotype-matched pairs communicate, that difficulty largely disappears — which tells us it's a language barrier, not a broken person. We look at why community is protective, why masking costs us, and why the evidence is stronger for autism than ADHD, with only grey-literature hints that double empathy extends to ADHD too.We then turn to intimacy across neurotypes — comparable desire for connection, but real barriers around sensory sensitivity, communication style, and a statistically higher likelihood of trauma. Finally, we bring in Gottman's work on partner responsiveness (turning towards vs turning away) and a warm-hug framing of attachment styles, landing on the most practical lever of all: understanding how you and your partner work, and meeting needs in the balance that's right for your context.In This Episode (Chapters)(00:00) Different, not defective — so why are relationships hard?(00:45) Friendship and loneliness: what the research bears out(02:00) Fewer but higher-quality friends — and why that's often a preference(02:45) A spectrum of understanding, not a skills deficit(03:30) Same language, different dialect: where nuance gets lost(04:15) The thin evidence base for ADHD and friendship(05:00) Masking costs us; community is protective(06:00) The double empathy problem, and how it was tested(08:00) Why it's a language barrier, not a broken person(09:00) Does double empathy extend to ADHD? A pragmatic argument(10:30) Intimacy across neurotypes: comparable desire, real barriers(11:30) Sensory sensitivity, communication, and trauma (content note)(13:00) It's not always "because I'm autistic" — stress and history matter(14:00) Gottman, turning towards vs turning away, and bids for connection(17:00) Partner responsiveness: the strongest lever we can pull(18:30) Attachment as a big warm hug: secure, avoidant, anxious, disorganised(21:00) ADHD, conflict, and satisfaction — statistical, not deterministic(23:00) The push-pull cycle of anxious and avoidant partners(25:00) Higher risk of interpersonal stress and how it shapes attachment(26:30) What we can do: naming our style, our needs, and our part(28:00) Boundaries as meeting our needs in balance — closing reflectionKey TakeawaysThe difficulty usually isn't in us — it lives in the interaction. Relational difficulty is a mismatch between communication styles, not an inherent deficit.On average, autistic people report more loneliness and fewer, lower-quality friendships — but this varies widely, and many of us genuinely prefer small, high-quality networks. Loneliness drops with better friends, not necessarily more of them.The double empathy problem reframes "social deficits" as social differences: neurotype-matched pairs communicate without significant impairment; the difficulty arises when different neurotypes meet. It's a contested idea, but a simple, elegant one.Masking costs us — it raises stress. Being around community is protective because our communication styles align more closely, so we feel heard, understood, and connected.The evidence base is strongest for autism; ADHD friendship research is thin, mostly in children and college students. Double empathy probably extends to ADHD (a pragmatic, clinical argument), via verbal impulsivity rather than filtering.Intimacy: desire for connection is comparable to the general community, but barriers around sensory sensitivity, communication, and a higher likelihood of trauma can get in the way — often it's stress or history amplifying the dynamic, not the neurotype itself.Partner responsiveness is the single strongest determinant of healthy neurodivergent relationships. Turning towards small bids for connection — even a "mm-hmm, yes dear" — builds trust; consistently turning away erodes it.Attachment is about trusting that our needs will be met. Secure, avoidant, anxious, and disorganised (anxious-avoidant) styles play out in a push-pull cycle — and our higher risk of interpersonal stress and trauma can push us toward insecure attachment.The practical work: ask what my attachment and relational style are, what I expect, what I might be doing that makes my partner pull away — and the reverse. Then have the conversation. Boundaries aren't about my needs or your needs; they're about meeting our needs in the best balance for our context.A Note on the EvidenceToday's discussion draws on a mix of peer-reviewed research (strongest for autism, and for the double empathy work), grey literature (particularly for any extension to ADHD), and lived-experience and clinical observation. Where the ADHD-and-friendship evidence is thin, or where the argument is pragmatic rather than trial-based, that's named clearly in the episode.DisclaimerThis episode is general educational and advocacy information only. It is not individualised or tailored therapy, assessment, or advice. Aaron does not provide relationship counselling. If you need support, please speak with your GP or a registered practitioner in your area.Thanks for listening, and remember — we are different, not defective. Support the showKeywords: AuDHD podcast, autism and ADHD, neurodivergent psychologist, neurodiversity affirming, Howearth Psychology, queer psychologist, autism diagnosis, ADHD awareness, lived experience, neurodivergent mental health, clinical psychology podcast

Send us Fan Mail🎙️ Ep 27: AuDHD Experience - Therapy Adaptations for Neurodivergent Folk (AuDHD, ADHD & Autism)  — What's the Point?"Barriers aren't a 'you' problem — they're an 'us' problem to manage together."Hi friends. If neurodivergent people are already showing up to therapy, why do affirming adaptations even matter? In this solo episode I work through that question from my own clinical experience and lived experience as an AuDHD psychologist. We map the barriers that keep neurodivergent people out of the therapy room — physical, psychological, emotional, sensory, and cognitive — and then walk back through the same five to look at small, practical, often low-cost changes that make care genuinely accessible. From externalising working memory and body doubling, to trauma-informed safety, non-fluorescent lighting, situational mutism, and a cushion instead of new chairs, this one is for neurodivergent listeners deciding what to ask for, and for clinicians wanting to do better.A note on the evidence: I'm speaking mostly from clinical and lived experience here, not a deep RCT base. Where I mention that neurodivergent people "endorse" adapted approaches as helpful, that's about acceptability and client-rated helpfulness — how much people value these adaptations — not proven treatment efficacy or effect sizes. The main study behind that point is Paynter, Sommer & Cook (2025), who asked autistic adults to rate the helpfulness of specific therapy adaptations. The passage on perimenopause and sensory gating is an emerging, still-contested area, not settled science — hold it lightly.Takeaways:• There's no single "neurodivergent barrier" — physical, psychological, emotional, sensory, and cognitive access all matter, and they stack.• Affirming therapy is trauma-informed by default; many of us carry complex stress and iatrogenic harm from past care.• Speech is never a choice — situational mutism is overwhelm, not defiance.• Meltdowns are overwhelm, and what looks like social anxiety or agoraphobia is often sensory-cognitive overload.• Most adaptations are cheap: in-session alarms, chunking information, body doubling, dimmable lights, a cushion, starting on time.• Clients: you're allowed to ask for a reasonable accommodation. Clinicians: mostly, just ask.If this was useful, please share it with a clinician who needs to hear it — that's the single best way to get affirming care to more people.📚 Reference: Paynter, J., Sommer, K., & Cook, A. (2025). How can we make therapy better for autistic adults? Autistic adults' ratings of helpfulness of adaptations to therapy. Autism. https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/13623613251313569Educational content only — this is not therapy or personalised clinical advice.We are different, not defective.Keywords: neurodivergent therapy, AuDHD, autism, ADHD, affirming practice, therapy adaptations, accessibility, situational mutism, sensory overwhelm, trauma-informed care, clinical psychologySupport the showKeywords: AuDHD podcast, autism and ADHD, neurodivergent psychologist, neurodiversity affirming, Howearth Psychology, queer psychologist, autism diagnosis, ADHD awareness, lived experience, neurodivergent mental health, clinical psychology podcast

Send us Fan Mail 🎙️ Episode 26: Understanding Neurodivergence - More Than Diagnosis"I can be autistic without autism spectrum disorder, in the same way that I can have legs without being broken."Summary:In this episode of The AuDHD Psych Podcast, clinical psychologist and AuDHDer Aaron Howearth takes on a question sparked by a challenge on social media: can you identify as autistic without holding a formal diagnosis of Autism Spectrum Disorder? The answer is yes — and in this episode, Aaron unpacks exactly why, drawing on clinical definitions, diagnostic criteria, the neurodiversity-affirming paradigm, and his own lived experience as an autistic ADHDer and former Navy serviceperson.Aaron begins by untangling three terms that are often conflated: neurodiversity, neurodivergent, and diagnosis. He explains that neurodiversity — like biodiversity — simply refers to the natural range of cognitive styles that exist across humans, while neurodivergent describes a brain that functions differently from the neurotypical majority. Autism, he argues, is a cluster of cognitive characteristics — not a disorder by default. Autism Spectrum Disorder, on the other hand, is the diagnostic label that applies only when those characteristics cause functional difficulties in the person's life.Drawing on Damian Milton's Double Empathy Problem, Aaron explores how social and communicative differences in autism are not inherent deficits, but mismatches between communication styles — a dialect problem, not a language problem. He walks through how the same characteristic (say, cognitive rigidity or impulsivity) can function as both a strength and a barrier depending on the environment, using vivid examples from his own clinical work and time in the Navy.Aaron also addresses the claim that autism diagnosis is "not a social construct," offering a clinical and philosophical unpacking of what a social construct actually is — and why diagnosis, by its very nature, fits that definition. He closes by emphasising that a neurodiversity-affirming perspective does not deny difficulty; it contextualises it. A person's expression of their characteristics as strengths or challenges will always interact with physical health, social inclusion, life stress, and environment.Key Themes & TakeawaysNeurodiversity vs Neurodivergent vs Diagnosis — Why these three terms are distinct, and why conflating them creates confusion about identity, language, and clinical need.Autism vs Autism Spectrum Disorder — Autism refers to a profile of cognitive characteristics; ASD is diagnosed only when those characteristics cause functional difficulties.Diagnosis as Social Construct — A clinical and philosophical explanation of why all diagnostic frameworks, including ASD, are socially constructed — and why that doesn't undermine their validity or usefulness.The Double Empathy Problem — Milton's framework explaining that autistic communication difficulties emerge from mismatch, not from inherent deficit; neurotypical people experience the same difficulty in autistic-majority environments.Valence-Neutral Characteristics — Every autistic or ADHD characteristic is contextually neutral: the same trait can be adaptive in one environment and a barrier in another.Cognitive Bandwidth & Masking — How the implicit effort of operating in a neurotypical world consumes cognitive resources, raising baseline stress and reducing capacity for flexibility.Formulation Thinking — Why a neurodiversity-affirming lens requires us to account for the interaction between characteristics and everything else in a person's life: sleep, health, social safety, and stress.Referenced ConceptsDSM-5 diagnostic criteria for Autism Spectrum DisorderDamian Milton's Double Empathy ProblemThe neurodiversity-affirming paradigmSocial and relational models of disabilityWe are different, not defective.🌐 Follow @AuDHDPsychPodcast on Instagram for content reels from each episode.📩 Send us your questions via fan mail — links in the episode player. Support the showKeywords: AuDHD podcast, autism and ADHD, neurodivergent psychologist, neurodiversity affirming, Howearth Psychology, queer psychologist, autism diagnosis, ADHD awareness, lived experience, neurodivergent mental health, clinical psychology podcast

Send us Fan Mail 🎙️ Episode 25: AuDHD Experience - Neurodiversity-Affirming Practice "Neurodiversity-affirming practice" is now on almost every clinician's website here in Australia and around the world — but what does it actually mean, and what should it look like in the room? In this episode, Aaron Howearth (Clinical Psychologist) unpacks affirming practice not as a marketing label, but as a genuine reorientation of how we understand, formulate, and work alongside neurodivergent people.We start with the conceptual foundations: relocating difficulty away from the individual and into the mismatch between a person and an environment that demands they be someone they're not. From there we walk through the domains where affirming practice actually shows up — formulation, language, collaborative goal-setting, therapeutic-style fit, and environmental adaptation — using the five Ps formulation and plenty of lived-experience examples along the way. We then name clearly what affirming practice is not: relabelling old deficit-focused work, abandoning clinical reasoning, avoiding difficulty, or imposing an affirming frame on someone who hasn't asked for it.Finally, we offer six practical markers you can use to tell whether the care you're giving or receiving is genuinely affirming — and an honest note on where the evidence base currently sits. As always, this is general educational information, not individualised therapy or advice.In This Episode (Chapters)(00:00) Welcome and why affirming practice matters(01:30) What the research tells us — and where the evidence base is thin(03:00) Affirming practice as a reorientation, not a new treatment model(04:30) Relocating disability: the environmental mismatch(06:00) What we're actually trying to do in therapy (and what we're not)(08:00) The domains of affirming practice: formulation, language, goals, adaptation(09:30) Identity-first vs person-first language(10:30) The five Ps formulation, worked through as a personal example(15:00) Building treatment plans that align with the client's goals(18:00) Why suppressing natural ways of being costs us — masking, burnout, safety(20:30) Adapting the therapy itself: the person–therapy fit and homework(24:00) What is NOT neurodiversity-affirming practice(28:00) Six markers of affirming care(34:00) Outcomes: quality of life, not typicality(36:00) A closing reflection and an honest note on the evidenceKey TakeawaysAffirming practice changes the work, not just the words. It's a reorientation of perspective, not a rebrand of deficit-focused therapy.Difficulty is relocated into the mismatch between a person and an environment that expects them to be different — not into the person themselves.The goal of therapy is a life that has value to the client and meets their goals, not normalising someone for what society expects.It is collaborative and consent-based: language, goals, and adaptations are co-designed, never imposed.It does not abandon clinical reasoning, the evidence base, or honesty — it holds those alongside genuine respect for the person.Homework that isn't getting done is a design problem to be barrier-managed, not a motivation failure.Six markers of affirming care: formulation names the environment; goals are client-led; goals don't ask for unhelpful masking; adaptations are individualised; language preference is asked, not assumed; outcomes are measured by quality of life.A Note on the EvidenceMuch of what's discussed today draws on lived-experience research and correlational data rather than randomised controlled trials. We don't yet have affirming interventions rated as evidence-based across systematic reviews — but the parallels with affirming practice in trans and queer communities, alongside strong lived-experience data, point clearly in this direction.DisclaimerThis episode is general educational information only. It is not individualised or tailored therapy, assessment, or support. If you need support, please seek out an affirming clinician in your area.Thanks for listening, and remember — we are different, not defective. Support the showKeywords: AuDHD podcast, autism and ADHD, neurodivergent psychologist, neurodiversity affirming, Howearth Psychology, queer psychologist, autism diagnosis, ADHD awareness, lived experience, neurodivergent mental health, clinical psychology podcast

Send us Fan Mail🎙️ Episode 24: AuDHD Experience - Late Diagnosis and Identity Reconstruction"After a lifetime of feeling wrong, broken, like a weirdo, along comes late diagnosis — but that's the doorway, not the destination."In this episode of AuDHD Psych, Aaron explores late diagnosis and identity reconstruction for autistic, ADHD and AuDHD people — why so many of us are found so late, and how we rebuild a sense of self afterwards. Drawing on the research and his own experience, he unpacks why late diagnosis is the norm rather than a personal failing, how internalising presentations and masking keep us under the radar, and why our diagnostic criteria, built around externalising behaviour, miss so many of us for decades. He looks at the double feeling of diagnosis — relief and grief arriving together — and at diagnosis as something that confirms who we already were rather than changing us. He also handles the borderline personality disorder pathway carefully, as a frequent misdiagnosis and conceptual overlap rather than a relabelling, while naming the stigma that does real harm.Takeaways:Late diagnosis is the norm, not the exception — being missed for years is what the research predicts, not evidence that you were ever fine. You weren't missed because you're not neurodivergent; you were missed because you didn't present the way the criteria expected.Our diagnostic criteria were built around externalising presentations in academic and clinical settings, creating an observation bias — so people who internalise, the author included, fly under the radar until the science catches up with the lived experience.Masking hides our characteristics, and higher masking predicts later diagnosis — the more we mask, the less we show up against the criteria. That same effort drains the cognitive and emotional energy we need for daily life, pushing us toward burnout, overwhelm, anxiety and, for some, depression and self-harm risk.Masking carries a heavier cost where we're raised to be "socially acceptable," which is part of why we talk about masculine and feminine presentations when we really mean externalising and internalising ones.Many neurodivergent people — particularly those raised as girls — receive a borderline personality disorder diagnosis before autism, ADHD or AuDHD. The two can genuinely coexist, but it is often a missed or mistaken identification, and the unfair stigma attached to BPD others people even further and makes things worse.Late diagnosis is frequently cathartic and a relief, and at the same time brings grief for what could have been and anger at having been called lazy, chaotic, "too much" or "not enough." Holding relief and grief together is not contradictory — it's the normal shape of finding out late.Diagnosis or self-identification doesn't change us; it gives us a framework to understand ourselves through that isn't only deficit-based. Compared against a neurodivergent frame, the "typical" person would look deficient too — it's difference, not defect.Identity reconstruction is gradual, not instant — we reconfigure our sense of self over time, find ourselves reflected in community, and integrate our emotional history, coming to see our characteristics as a source of strengths as well as struggles.Reflect on a characteristic you associate with deficit — say impulsivity — and look for where it has actually served you: a leap that brought adventure, curiosity that fed creativity or research, pattern recognition that made you brilliant with systems. A balanced, true view of yourself is the foundation for rebuilding who you are.Support the showKeywords: AuDHD podcast, autism and ADHD, neurodivergent psychologist, neurodiversity affirming, Howearth Psychology, queer psychologist, autism diagnosis, ADHD awareness, lived experience, neurodivergent mental health, clinical psychology podcast

Send us Fan Mail🎙 Episode 23: AuDHD Experience - Joy, Strengths and Quality of Life"Strengths-based framings sit alongside, not instead of, our support needs — so keep both ideas in mind."In this episode of AuDHD Psych, Aaron explores joy, strengths, and quality of life for AuDHDers — moving past both the deficit-and-disorder framing and the neurodivergent-superpower narrative to find the partial truth in each. Drawing on recent research, he unpacks the strengths autistic and ADHD people endorse (pattern recognition, hyperfocus, humour, creativity), how flow, hyperfocus, and monotropism overlap, and why our strengths are linked to well-being when we name and use them. He also looks at what genuinely lifts quality of life — affirming relationships, good environmental fit, support, and community — while warning against environments that extract our strengths without supporting our needs.Takeaways:Neither the deficit-and-disorder framing nor the superpower narrative is the full truth — strengths-based framings sit alongside, not instead of, our support needs.Research backs the strengths neurodivergent people describe: autistic strengths like pattern recognition, detail orientation, systematising, deep expertise, and a justice orientation; ADHD strengths like hyperfocus, humour, and creativity, endorsed well above the typical community.Strengths are linked to well-being — first by knowing and naming them, then by using them in your life. ADHD creativity and divergent thinking are also linked to real-world achievement and even deliberate mind-wandering.Flow, hyperfocus, and monotropism share much of the same terrain — feeling good in the doing and getting to unmask — but it's a dose-response curve: restorative up to a point, then a driver of burnout.Monotropism appears to be transdiagnostic, scoring above the general population in both autistic people and ADHDers, and underpins special interests as a well-being variable.Autistic adults score lower across all four WHO well-being domains, with autistic women carrying a disproportionate burden — but employment, support, and relationships are concrete, observable improvers.Quality over quantity: a few reciprocal, accepting, affirming relationships support well-being far more than many social contacts. A positive autistic identity, mediated by external acceptance and community, also lifts quality of life.Much of the "disorder" we diagnose reflects a mismatch between person and environment, not an inherent flaw — Milton's double empathy problem reframes communication "deficits" as differences that dissolve in affirming spaces.Beware extraction: environments that benefit from your strengths without supporting your difficulties are a structural problem requiring a structural fix — environmental, cognitive, sensory, and social accommodations.Reflect on three of your own neurodivergent strengths and where you apply them, and seek out environments and community where you can unmask and feel safe — joy and well-being are real, and joy is a variable of well-being.Keywords:AuDHD, neurodivergent strengths, joy, quality of life, monotropism, hyperfocus, flow, well-being, special interests, double empathy problem, environmental fit, burnout, affirming community, different not defectiveSupport the showKeywords: AuDHD podcast, autism and ADHD, neurodivergent psychologist, neurodiversity affirming, Howearth Psychology, queer psychologist, autism diagnosis, ADHD awareness, lived experience, neurodivergent mental health, clinical psychology podcast

Send us Fan Mail⚠️ Content note: This episode discusses suicide and suicidal thoughts directly and at length. It is general education, not personal advice. If this feels like a lot, please pause and reach out to a support service (Australian helplines listed at the end).Episode 22: AuDHD Experience – Suicidality & Protective FactorsIn this episode of the AuDHD Psych Podcast, clinical psychologist Aaron Howearth explores why suicidality risk is higher in neurodivergent communities — and why that risk is not inherent to being autistic, ADHD, or AuDHD. Drawing on clinical work, lived experience, and recent research, Aaron is clear that elevated risk is an outcome of the interaction between neurodivergent people and environments that don't accommodate them. The through-line of the whole conversation: we are different, not defective, and it's not your fault.Aaron unpacks the mechanisms behind heightened risk — constant masking leading to defeat and entrapment, thwarted belonging and a sense of burdensomeness, isolation and minority stress, and unmet support needs. He then turns to crisis care and affirming support, with a direct message to clinicians about flat affect, sensory-hostile environments, and the difference between autism, ADHD, AuDHD and trauma. The episode closes on hope: the protective factors and practical safety-planning scripts that can genuinely reduce risk.Key Themes & TakeawaysRisk Is Real, Not Inherent – Suicidality is elevated in neurodivergent communities, but it reflects environmental mismatch and accumulated stress, not a flaw in the person.Masking → Defeat → Entrapment – Constant camouflaging is exhausting and, when reinforced over time, can drive feelings of defeat and entrapment.Belonging & Burdensomeness – Thwarted belonging and a sense of being "a burden" can heighten risk, especially alongside complex trauma histories.Isolation & Minority Stress – Social exclusion, sensory load, and the extra stresses of being a disempowered group compound over time.Crisis Care Can Fail Us – Flat affect being misread and sensory-hostile crisis settings can drive disengagement from support.Affirming Care Matters – Sensory and communication accommodations, and directly asking about risk, help people feel safe enough to engage.Protective Factors – Positive childhood experiences, community and belonging, unmasking, and sensory fit all reduce risk.Safety Planning Works – Make a safety plan while you're well, with someone you trust — it's yours, and it can change over time. Includes scripts for clients and clinicians.If you need support:  · Suicide Call Back Service 1300 659 467 · 13YARN (for Aboriginal & Torres Strait Islander people) 13 92 76. · QLife (LGBTIQ+ peer support) 1800 184 527. · Lifeline 13 11 14 · Beyond Blue 1300 22 4636Support the showKeywords: AuDHD podcast, autism and ADHD, neurodivergent psychologist, neurodiversity affirming, Howearth Psychology, queer psychologist, autism diagnosis, ADHD awareness, lived experience, neurodivergent mental health, clinical psychology podcast

Send us Fan MailEpisode 21 – Trauma, PTSD & Systems HarmWhat if you're not "too much," "too complex," or "treatment resistant"? What if the very systems designed to help neurodivergent people are inadvertently causing harm instead?In this episode, Aaron explores the deep intersection between neurodivergence and trauma — and why so many AuDHDers, autistic folks, and ADHDers find themselves stuck in cycles of misdiagnosis, invalidation, and burnout.What we coverThe difference between big T trauma (PTSD) and complex trauma (cPTSD), and why complex trauma is so prevalent in neurodivergent communitiesWhy neurodivergent people are statistically more exposed to trauma, bullying, social exclusion, and adverse childhood experiences (ACEs)How diagnostic overshadowing leads clinicians to mislabel trauma responses as personality disorders — or dismiss them entirelyThe structural harms baked into school systems, healthcare, and historical practices like ABAHow masking, allostatic load, and burnout compound trauma and erode identityWhy service avoidance is often a reasonable response to repeated invalidationThe link between systems harm, hopelessness, and elevated suicidality in our communitiesPractical scripts for advocating with GPs, psychologists, and other clinicians when you feel unheardKey takeawayThe "complexity" so often attributed to neurodivergent clients usually isn't about us — it's about a mismatch between our characteristics, our histories, and systems built for someone else. Understanding trauma and neurodivergence together makes the "complex" much less complex.Content warningThis episode discusses trauma, complex trauma, interpersonal violence, school bullying, healthcare harm, and suicidality at a conceptual level. Please pause and reach out to a support service if needed:Lifeline: 13 11 14Beyond Blue: 1300 22 463613YARN: 13 92 76QLife: 1800 184 527Emergency: 000Referenced researchStickley (2022) – ACEs and neurodivergenceBerg (2024) – Adverse childhood experiences in autistic adolescentsAdams (2025) – Parents on CAMHS: "accumulating harm and waiting for crisis"You are not too much. You are not defective. You are different — and you are worthwhile.🎧 Subscribe, share with someone who needs to hear it, and join the conversation on Instagram @audhdpsychpodcastSupport the showKeywords: AuDHD podcast, autism and ADHD, neurodivergent psychologist, neurodiversity affirming, Howearth Psychology, queer psychologist, autism diagnosis, ADHD awareness, lived experience, neurodivergent mental health, clinical psychology podcast

Send us Fan MailEpisode 20: AuDHD Explained — Misdiagnosis, BPD & Mental Health in Late-Diagnosed AdultsIn this episode of the AuDHD Psych Podcast, clinical psychologist Aaron Howearth and co-host Dan unpack why mental health diagnosis is so complex for AuDHDers, and why so many of us collect a stack of labels — depression, generalised anxiety, borderline personality disorder, bipolar, treatment-resistant depression — before Autism and ADHD are ever properly considered. Drawing on clinical work, lived experience, and the qualitative research literature, Aaron explains how diagnostic overshadowing happens, why internalising presentations are most at risk of misdiagnosis, and what genuinely neurodiversity-affirming assessment looks like in practice.Aaron and Dan work through the mechanics of overshadowing — how a clinician's existing diagnostic lens quietly re-explains every new symptom and closes the door on alternative formulations — and the elevated mental health risks that ride alongside AuDHD, including anxiety, depression, self-harm and suicidality. They examine why biological females and internalising males are disproportionately mislabelled with borderline personality disorder when emotional impulsivity, rejection sensitivity and rigid thought patterns are actually expressions of an undiagnosed AuDHD profile. They then move into the practical: how to script questions for your clinician without it landing as an attack, why differential diagnosis and formulation are the antidote to overshadowing, and how late diagnosis reframes self-concept from "bad person, not trying hard enough" to environment-fit. Throughout, the conversation returns to the affirming reframe — difficulties arise from the mismatch between who you are and what the environment expects, not from a defective self.Key Themes & TakeawaysCo-occurrence Is the Rule, Not the Exception – Around 40% of autistic people have a co-occurring mental health condition, ADHDers are similarly elevated, and AuDHDers sit at higher risk again for anxiety, depression, self-harm and suicidality.Diagnostic Overshadowing Defined – Once a clinician holds one diagnostic lens, new symptoms get re-explained through it, and alternative formulations stop being considered.The Observation Fallacy – Clinicians can only diagnose what they know to look for; if AuDHD isn't on the radar, the symptoms get mapped to whatever lens is familiar.BPD as the Classic Misdiagnosis – Emotional impulsivity, rejection sensitivity, identity disturbance and rigid thought can all be AuDHD expressions, particularly in biological females and internalisers whose presentations don't match the externalising male stereotype that built the diagnostic criteria.1 in 5 Autistic Adults Report Overshadowing – Lived experience and self-report research show roughly 20% of autistic adults have experienced misdiagnosis or missed diagnosis tied to overshadowing.Treatment-Resistant Doesn't Mean Broken – When treatment plans target the wrong formulation, "not responding" is a systems failure, not a character flaw or proof of imposter syndrome.Differential Diagnosis & Formulation – Good assessment ticks the diagnostic boxes and excludes confounds, situating symptoms inside developmental history, sensory profile, trauma, family history and cognitive profile.Neurodiversity-Affirming Assessment – Goes beyond awareness to actively consider AuDHD interactions, masking effects, and the cognitive and sensory differences that shape presentation and treatment.Scripting for Appointments – Lines like "I'm wondering how you came to that conclusion — do you have a formulation that led to the treatment plan?" make hard conversations doable without landing as an attack on the clinician.Self-Knowledge Is a Clinical Safety Issue – Understanding your own formulation isn't an optional extra; it protects against decades of misfitting diagnoses and treatments built on the wrong foundation.Late Diagnosis Reframes Self-Concept – Understanding your characteristics through an AuDHD lens replaces years of "bad person, not trying hard enough" narratives with environment-fit explanations and self-forgiveness.Hard Mode Is Context-Specific – AuDHDers may live life on hard mode for admin and rigid-rule contexts while playing easy mode for problem-solving and pattern recognition; diagnosis is a context map, not a verdict.Different, Not Defective – Change the environment and the expectations, and the same characteristics that look like disorder in one setting become strengths in another.Scripts to use with your clinicians:Re-Assessment Request: "I have been carrying these diagnoses for a long time and the treatments have not led to the changes I had hoped for. I would like to ask whether autism, ADHD or AuDHD has ever been formally considered as part of the formulation, and what a neurodiversity-informed assessment might look like." Formulation Question: "Can we look at this together as a formulation rather than only as a diagnosis? I would like to understand how my sensory experience, my history of masking and burnout, my executive functioning, and my life context are being weighed in the picture you are forming." Diagnostic Overshadowing Prompt: "I am concerned that some of what I am experiencing is being explained primarily by my existing diagnosis. Can we slow down and consider whether there is something else, including potentially a neurodevelopmental factor, that needs to be assessed in its own right?" Support the showKeywords: AuDHD podcast, autism and ADHD, neurodivergent psychologist, neurodiversity affirming, Howearth Psychology, queer psychologist, autism diagnosis, ADHD awareness, lived experience, neurodivergent mental health, clinical psychology podcast

Send us Fan MailEpisode 19: AuDHD Is More Than the Sum of Its Parts – Cognitive Differences, Energy Economy & Late DiagnosisIn this episode of the AuDHD Psych Podcast, clinical psychologist Aaron Howearth and co-host Dan explore why AuDHD isn't simply Autism plus ADHD, but a distinct presentation with its own cognitive, emotional, and behavioural fingerprint. Drawing on clinical work, lived experience, and recent research, Aaron traces the diagnostic history back to the DSM-5 (2013) — the first time Autism and ADHD could be formally co-diagnosed — and explains why anyone diagnosed before 2015 may have had half their neurotype missed.Aaron and Dan dig into the cognitive differences that set AuDHD apart, including a study showing AuDHD young people experience greater difficulties than their autistic or ADHD peers across planning, attention, simultaneous processing, and successive processing. They unpack the energy economy of AuDHD — how the tug-of-war between routine-seeking autistic characteristics and novelty-seeking, impulsive ADHD characteristics drives masking, burnout, anxiety, and depression — and reframe these patterns through a "different, not defective" lens that centres environment, context, and self-knowledge. Throughout, they offer practical, shame-free reflections on self-identification, late diagnosis grief, adaptive functioning, finding affirming clinicians, and the strengths of an AuDHD problem-solving brain.Key Themes & TakeawaysAuDHD Is Not Just Additive – AuDHD includes autistic characteristics, ADHD characteristics, and unique features that exist outside either diagnosis on its own.Diagnostic History Matters – Pre-2013 DSM rules blocked co-diagnosis, meaning many adults diagnosed before 2015 likely had half their profile missed.Cognitive Profile Differences – Research suggests AuDHD young people show greater differences across planning, attention, simultaneous and successive processing than autistic-only or ADHD-only peers.Energy Economy & Burnout – Holding routine-seeking and novelty-seeking together costs cognitive and emotional energy, increasing masking, stress, and burnout risk.Anxiety, Depression & Internalising – AuDHDers are more likely to internalise and mask, layering additional anxiety on top of the additive load of both neurotypes.Early vs Late Diagnosis – Late identification can bring grief for "what could have been," but also self-forgiveness and the relief of finally understanding your own brain.Adaptive Functioning in Daily Life – From booking holidays to grocery shopping and showering, AuDHD cognitive differences ripple into self-concept, health, and PDA-style avoidance.Strengths of the AuDHD Brain – Systems and detail orientation (Autism) plus associative, tangential thinking (ADHD) creates a powerful problem-solving brain.Self-Advocacy with Clinicians – Ask for assessment of both Autism and ADHD, and check the clinician understands current AuDHD-specific science, masking interactions, and lived experience research.Reframing "In Between" – AuDHDers aren't half-autistic and half-ADHD; they're both and more — a whole buffet of characteristics, not a single dish.Different, Not Defective – Change the environment and expectations, and the same characteristics that hinder in one context can serve you in another.Support the showKeywords: AuDHD podcast, autism and ADHD, neurodivergent psychologist, neurodiversity affirming, Howearth Psychology, queer psychologist, autism diagnosis, ADHD awareness, lived experience, neurodivergent mental health, clinical psychology podcast

Send us Fan Mail🎙️ Episode 18: Understanding AuDHD in the Real World - Time Blindness, Planning & Task InitiationIn this episode of the AuDHD Psych Podcast, clinical psychologist Aaron Howearth and co‑host Dan explore why getting started on “simple” tasks can feel impossibly hard for AuDHD brains, even when the motivation and desire are absolutely there. Drawing on clinical work and lived experience, Aaron explains prospective memory (remembering to do things in the future), time blindness, and executive function differences that turn “make a phone call” or “apply for uni” into an overwhelming tangle of steps, fears, and past experiences of running out of time.Aaron and Dan unpack the urgency cycle and last‑minute sprint – why panic can act as a powerful attention anchor, but also reinforces anxiety, exhaustion, and the belief that you “only work under pressure.” They tease apart procrastination from task initiation difficulty, and look at how ADHD impulsivity and autistic set‑shifting differences interact in AuDHD, making it harder to switch away from interests toward boring, complex, or ambiguous tasks. Throughout, they offer practical, shame‑free strategies like timers, reminders, body doubling, and micro‑steps, while emphasising self‑compassion: this isn’t laziness, it’s a different brain that needs different tools.Key Themes & TakeawaysProspective Memory & Time Blindness – How remembering future intentions and accurately sensing time are both executive functions that often work differently in AuDHD.Planning Load & Overwhelm – Why not knowing all the steps (e.g., applying for uni, legal admin) makes tasks feel impossibly big and easy to avoid.Urgency Cycle & “Last‑Minute Only” Mode – How relying on panic to get started reinforces anxiety, burnout, and the belief that you can’t begin until it’s almost too late.AuDHD Interaction, Not Just Addition – How ADHD impulsivity/inattention plus autistic set‑shifting and intense interests create unique patterns of inertia and stuckness.Task Initiation vs Procrastination – Differentiating moralised “putting things off” from genuine difficulty initiating action, even on important, wanted tasks.Timers, Reminders & External Time Anchors – Using visual/auditory timers, layered reminders, and alarms to compensate for internal time blindness.Body Doubling & Social Accountability – How doing tasks alongside another person (in‑person or virtual) can anchor attention and make planning or admin more doable.Micro‑Steps & First‑Step Reframes – Breaking tasks into tiny, concrete actions (“just set the alarm,” “just make the call”) to reduce overwhelm and build new patterns.Self‑Compassion Over Shame – Reframing “lazy” or “inconvenient” narratives into an understanding that AuDHD brains need tailored strategies, not harsher self‑talk.Support the showKeywords: AuDHD podcast, autism and ADHD, neurodivergent psychologist, neurodiversity affirming, Howearth Psychology, queer psychologist, autism diagnosis, ADHD awareness, lived experience, neurodivergent mental health, clinical psychology podcast

Send us Fan Mail🎙️ Episode 17: Understanding AuDHD in the Real World - Sensory Processing and Overwhelm in ADHD, Autism & AuDHDEpisode SummaryIn this episode of The AuDHD Psych Podcast, Aaron Howearth explores how sensory profiles shape daily life for autistic, ADHD, and AuDHD individuals. Why does a flickering light, a chatty colleague, or a tag in your shirt seem to "set you off" — when really, you've been quietly carrying that load all day?Drawing from clinical psychology and lived experience, Aaron explains how neurodivergent nervous systems often process sight, sound, touch, smell, taste, balance, and body position differently from the average person. He unpacks why these differences are not defects, but a mismatch between our sensory profile and environments built for typical sensory experience.Aaron introduces the build-up model of overwhelm — how small sensory costs accumulate across the day until what looks like an overreaction is actually a proportionate response to hours of unseen strain. He links sensory load to attention, masking, emotional regulation, and burnout, and explains how sensory gating, hidden coping, and reduced tolerance can spiral into a vicious cycle.This episode offers validation, language, and practical strategies for identifying high-cost sensory channels, designing neuroaffirming environments, and treating sensory fit as a legitimate accessibility issue rather than special treatment.Key Themes & TakeawaysSensory Profiles Explained – How autism, ADHD, and AuDHD involve over- and under-sensitivity across multiple sensory dimensions.The Build-Up Model of Overwhelm – Why the "last straw" reaction reflects cumulative load, not fragility.Sensory Gating & Attention – How difficulty filtering input amplifies inattention, frustration, and cognitive fatigue.Masking the Sensory Cost – How suppressing sensory reactions drains energy and feeds burnout.Mental Health Impact – Why visual, auditory, and tactile sensitivities strongly link to anxiety, mood, and overwhelm.Environmental Design – Practical adjustments: lighting, headphones, quiet zones, predictability, exits, and breaks.Tracking What Works – Why outcomes matter more than assumed-helpful strategies.Reframing Overreaction – Moving from "too sensitive" to recognising a nervous system doing extra work in a world not built for it.Support the showKeywords: AuDHD podcast, autism and ADHD, neurodivergent psychologist, neurodiversity affirming, Howearth Psychology, queer psychologist, autism diagnosis, ADHD awareness, lived experience, neurodivergent mental health, clinical psychology podcast

Send us Fan Mail🎙️ Episode 16: AuDHD in the Real World - Masking, Burnout & UnmaskingEpisode SummaryIn this episode of the AuDHD Psych Podcast, Aaron Howearth unpacks masking and camouflaging as neurodivergent survival strategies. He explains how autistic and ADHD people learn conscious and unconscious ways of “passing” as typical, such as practised eye contact, softened honesty, and scripted conversations, often long before they have words for their neurodivergence. Aaron explores how this constant self‑monitoring and suppression of stims, emotions, and sensory needs drains cognitive and emotional energy, contributing to exhaustion, low social battery, and executive functioning crashes. He also touches on late diagnosis, identity confusion, and grief around not knowing “where the mask ends and I begin.” Throughout, he reframes “disorder” as a mismatch between neurodivergent needs and environmental demands, normalises collapse after masking‑heavy days, and invites listeners to compare one high‑cost masking context with one low‑mask or safe environment.Key Themes & TakeawaysWhat Masking Is – Compensatory behaviours neurodivergent people use to meet typical social, sensory, and behavioural expectations and to “pass” as non‑neurodivergent.Conscious vs Unconscious Masking – Habits like practised eye contact versus deliberate strategies such as softening blunt corrections or scripting conversations.Cognitive Load & Exhaustion – Self‑monitoring, impulse suppression, and managing tone, face, and stims consume working memory and lead to exhaustion and executive crashes.Sensory & Stim Suppression – Hiding stims and enduring uncomfortable environments increase stress and reduce emotional and cognitive capacity.Identity & Imposter Feelings – Long‑term masking can blur the line between self and performance, fuelling imposter syndrome and grief about “who I could have been.”Masking as Safety Behaviour – Framed as a survival strategy to avoid stigma and rejection, even while it can worsen mental health over time.Mismatch, Not Defectiveness – “Disorder” is located in the mismatch between neurodivergent traits and environmental expectations, not in personal failure.High‑ vs Low‑Cost Contexts – Listeners are invited to notice where masking is most draining versus where they can be more authentic and safe.Reframing Collapse – Post‑social collapse and burnout are described as the result of prolonged effort in non‑accommodating spaces, not weakness.Community & Normalisation – Competence collapse, grief, and confusion are positioned as common, shared neurodivergent experiences rather than individual defects.Support the showKeywords: AuDHD podcast, autism and ADHD, neurodivergent psychologist, neurodiversity affirming, Howearth Psychology, queer psychologist, autism diagnosis, ADHD awareness, lived experience, neurodivergent mental health, clinical psychology podcast

Send us Fan Mail🎙️ Episode 15: Rejection Sensitivity & Dysphoria in ADHD, Autism & AuDHDEpisode SummaryIn this episode of The AuDHD Psych Podcast, Aaron Howearth explores rejection sensitivity, emotional intensity, and rejection sensitive dysphoria through a neurodiversity-affirming lens. He explains why some autistic, ADHD, and AuDHD people experience emotions as suddenly overwhelming, especially when past experiences of rejection, exclusion, or social misunderstanding shape how current situations are interpreted.Drawing from clinical psychology, Aaron describes emotions as a bodily response to our cognitive appraisal of context, then links that to fight, flight, freeze, fawn, and flop responses, as well as differences in interoception and alexithymia. He shows how rejection sensitivity can amplify ambiguous social cues, how anticipation of rejection can feel as painful as rejection itself, and why people may move quickly from calm to intense dysphoria without noticing emotion building in the background.Aaron also discusses how these patterns can contribute to people pleasing, self-sacrifice, masking, burnout, and interpersonal stress, and how they can resemble some features often associated with borderline personality disorder without reducing people to a label. He then offers practical strategies, including using the NICE framework, redirecting attention toward novelty, interest, challenge, or emergency, and replacing “you’re too much” with a more compassionate understanding that people are responding to context, not failing as people.Key Themes & TakeawaysEmotions as Body + Context – How emotional intensity emerges from the body’s response to our appraisal of current and past context, not from feelings alone.Fight, Flight, Freeze, Fawn, Flop – How different threat appraisals map onto distinct survival responses, from fighting and escaping to shutting down or dissociating.Rejection Sensitivity – How repeated real or perceived rejection can prime people to interpret ambiguity as exclusion and to miss positive social cues.Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria – How the lived experience of intense distress around rejection is recognised in community, even though it is not a formal diagnosis.Alexithymia and Interoception – How difficulty identifying emotions, and differences in sensing internal states, can make emotions feel sudden or hard to regulate.People Pleasing V Self-Sacrifice – How prioritising others’ needs over one’s own can become a safety strategy shaped by exclusion, masking, and fear of rejection.Burnout and Interpersonal Stress – How chronic self-suppression and social threat detection can compound stress and contribute to autistic burnout.NICE Framework in Practice – How novelty, interest, challenge, and emergency can be used to anchor attention and support regulation when emotions become intense.Self-Compassion and Belonging – How replacing “you’re too much” with “you’re just the right amount” supports a more humane, community-based understanding of neurodivergent experience.Support the showKeywords: AuDHD podcast, autism and ADHD, neurodivergent psychologist, neurodiversity affirming, Howearth Psychology, queer psychologist, autism diagnosis, ADHD awareness, lived experience, neurodivergent mental health, clinical psychology podcast

Send us Fan Mail🎙️ Episode 14: AuDHD in the Real World – School, Work, Relationships and BurnoutEpisode SummaryIn this episode of The AuDHD Psych Podcast, clinical psychologist Aaron Howearth moves from talking about AuDHD traits in theory to how they actually show up across school, work, relationships, and daily life. He explores what school can look like for autistic, ADHD, and AuDHD kids behind the report cards: bright, capable students who miss key details because their attention is pulled to everything happening around them, collecting “failure” experiences and perfectionistic self‑criticism even when they’re genuinely trying. Aaron shares a primary‑school story about getting absorbed in playground handball, missing a chance to use the bathroom, then rigidly following a teacher’s “you should have gone at recess” rule and wetting himself in class, illustrating how interest‑based attention and autistic rule‑keeping can collide in inflexible systems.He then looks at why neurodivergent students so often struggle more consistently than their neurotypical peers: the extra cognitive load of sitting still, suppressing stims, noticing every distraction, and trying to hold and process information in working memory at the same time. Aaron explains how people whose overall abilities are above average can still have relative weaknesses in working memory or processing speed that make standard classrooms and “just keep up with the teacher” delivery especially hard. Rather than framing these differences as laziness or defect, he reframes them as a mismatch between our cognitive profiles and systems designed by and for the statistical middle, and outlines practical accommodations like extra test time, movement breaks, and offering information in multiple formats.Shifting into adulthood, Aaron discusses how the same patterns re‑emerge at work: fluorescent lights that trigger migraines, noisy open‑plan offices that overload attention, and instructions given in ways that don’t match a person’s processing style. He emphasises that adjustments like quieter rooms, flexible lighting, clear written instructions, and task structures that fit how someone’s brain works are not special treatment but good workplace design.Key Themes & TakeawaysExecutive Functioning & School – How distractibility, missed details, and perfectionism shape self‑esteem and “I’m not good enough” narratives from early on.Rules, Rigidity & Social Fallout – How autistic rule‑following and ADHD‑style attention can combine to create painful but misunderstood social moments.Systems and Mismatch – Why education and workplace systems built around the “average” brain leave neurodivergent people overworking just to keep pace.Working Memory & Processing Speed – How uneven cognitive profiles make standard teaching and instruction styles harder, and why multi‑format information helps.Workplaces, Sensory Load & EF – The impact of lights, noise, busyness, and unclear instructions on task completion, performance, and wellbeing.Masking, Burnout & Capacity – What it looks like when masking tips into neurodivergent burnout, and why change needs to happen before full collapse.Relationships & Assumptions – How an “all the details” brain plus anxiety can generate inaccurate, negatively skewed stories about other people.Redefining “Disorder” – Viewing diagnosis as a description of mismatch between person and environment, not proof of personal defect.Support the showKeywords: AuDHD podcast, autism and ADHD, neurodivergent psychologist, neurodiversity affirming, Howearth Psychology, queer psychologist, autism diagnosis, ADHD awareness, lived experience, neurodivergent mental health, clinical psychology podcast

Send us Fan Mail🎙️ Episode 13: Understanding AuDHD – Executive Functioning and Daily Life (Part 2)Episode SummaryIn this episode of The AuDHD Psych Podcast, clinical psychologist Aaron Howearth moves from explaining executive functioning to exploring practical ways autistic, ADHD, and AuDHD people can work with their brains in daily life. He looks at how differences in working memory, processing speed, time perception, self-monitoring, and motivation interact with anxiety and self-esteem, and why our capacity to start, continue, and finish tasks can swing so dramatically from day to day.Aaron describes how an ADHD-style “problem-solving brain” can flip into a “problem-finding brain” when worry and rumination take over, especially in generalized anxiety. He introduces worry postponement (also called worry time or the worry chair) as a structured way to park worries during the day, revisit them briefly in a time-limited “worry window,” and reclaim attention for the people, tasks, and moments that matter. Read more about worry postponement here: https://www.cci.health.wa.gov.au/~/media/CCI/Mental-Health-Professionals/Generalised-Anxiety/Generalised-Anxiety---Information-Sheets/Generalised-Anxiety-Information-Sheet---05---Postpone-your-Worry.pdfHe also shares neurodivergent-friendly tools for time blindness, task initiation, and follow-through: externalising time with alarms, visual timers, and apps; body doubling and social accountability; reducing visual clutter and sensory load; and building routines gradually through habit stacking rather than overwhelming, all-or-nothing life overhauls. Throughout the episode, Aaron reframes “disorder” not as something inherent to autistic or ADHD traits, but as a mismatch between our brains and inflexible environments and expectations, inviting a more compassionate, neurodiversity-affirming way to understand executive functioning differences.Key Themes & TakeawaysExecutive Functioning & Self-Concept – How repeated struggles with organisation, planning, and follow-through shape self-esteem and internal narratives like “I’m a failure.”ADHD Problem-Solving vs Problem-Finding – When a fast, creative brain shifts into scanning for everything that might go wrong and filling the gaps with negative assumptions.Worry Postponement – Using scheduled worry time to note worries during the day, revisit them briefly later, and reduce rumination while still letting the brain feel heard.Environmental Accommodations – Supports like written instructions, reduced visual clutter, sensory adjustments, and breaking tasks into smaller, more manageable steps.Time Blindness & Externalising Time – Making time concrete with timers, alarms, visual countdowns, and short, structured work blocks (e.g. Pomodoro-style sprints).Body Doubling & Accountability – Using co-working, study buddies, supervisors, therapists, or friends as external anchors while respecting strong drives for autonomy.Habit Stacking & Routine – Attaching new behaviours to existing habits so helpful routines become more automatic and less dependent on motivation in the moment.Redefining “Disorder” – Viewing diagnosis as a description of mismatch between person and environment rather than a verdict on the worth or capability of neurodivergent people.Support the showKeywords: AuDHD podcast, autism and ADHD, neurodivergent psychologist, neurodiversity affirming, Howearth Psychology, queer psychologist, autism diagnosis, ADHD awareness, lived experience, neurodivergent mental health, clinical psychology podcast

Send us Fan Mail🎙️ Episode 13: Executive Functioning in Daily Life: ADHD, Autism & AuDHDEpisode SummaryIn this episode of The AuDHD Psych Podcast, Aaron Howearth explores how executive functioning shapes everyday life for autistic, ADHD, and AuDHD individuals. Why do tasks that “should” be simple – studying, working, organising the day, or following through on plans – so often feel overwhelming or impossible, even when we know exactly what we’re meant to be doing?Drawing from both clinical psychology and lived experience, Aaron explains executive functions as the brain’s “mental mechanics”: planning, organisation, working memory, impulse control, sustained attention, and cognitive flexibility. He unpacks how differences in these areas are common across neurodevelopmental conditions and how they influence our ability to start, persist with, and complete tasks in real-world contexts.Aaron also explores the apparent contradiction between autistic and ADHD profiles – rules, structure, and rigidity on one side; impulsivity, distractibility, and jumping between tasks on the other – and how these traits can coexist within AuDHD individuals. Rather than seeing executive functioning as a fixed trait, he highlights how attention, motivation, and follow-through shift with factors like environment, stress, novelty, interest, and internal state.This episode offers clarity, validation, and a practical language for understanding why executive functioning challenges show up the way they do, and invites a more compassionate, neurodiversity-affirming perspective on how we navigate daily life with different “mental mechanics.”Key Themes & TakeawaysExecutive Functions Explained – What planning, working memory, cognitive flexibility, impulse control, and self-monitoring are, and how they operate as the brain’s day-to-day management system.ADHD Executive Profiles – How inattention, distractibility, impulsivity, delay intolerance, and working memory challenges affect studying, work tasks, multi-step activities, and follow-through.Autistic Executive Profiles – How differences in flexibility and planning show up as routines, rules-based thinking, “rigidity,” and difficulty shifting track in conversations or when plans change.AuDHD Internal Tension – Why having both rule-following drives and impulsive, distractible tendencies can create chronic stress, self-criticism, and a build-up of unfinished tasks.Working Memory & Everyday Life – How reduced working memory capacity contributes to lost intentions, forgotten items, and difficulties holding and manipulating information in the moment.Impulse, Consequences & Social Impact – How acting on impulses without fully projecting consequences can subtly but significantly affect learning, relationships, and self-image over time. Rigidity, Routine & Habit Stacking – How turning cognitive rigidity into structured routines and habit stacks can reduce executive load and make important tasks more automatic.Contextual Functioning – How environment, expectations, stress, and internal states influence executive capacity, and why functioning can fluctuate rather than reflect a fixed level of ability.Reframing “Difficulty” – Moving away from moralising language like “lazy” or “disorganised” toward a neurodiversity-affirming understanding of executive functioning differences and how to work with them.Support the showKeywords: AuDHD podcast, autism and ADHD, neurodivergent psychologist, neurodiversity affirming, Howearth Psychology, queer psychologist, autism diagnosis, ADHD awareness, lived experience, neurodivergent mental health, clinical psychology podcast

Send us Fan Mail🎙️ Episode 11: Q&A Part 2Episode SummaryIn this episode of The AuDHD Psych Podcast, Aaron Howearth continues the community Q&A, responding to several commonly asked questions about neurodivergent experiences and expanding on themes raised in previous episodes. The conversation covers topics including perimenopause and menopause in neurodivergent people, the relationship between neurodiversity and gender diversity, how diagnostic impairment levels can change across life circumstances, and the internal tensions often experienced by people with both autistic and ADHD traits. Aaron explains how hormonal fluctuations during perimenopause and menopause can influence neurotransmitter systems linked to attention, sensory processing, and executive functioning. For some neurodivergent people, these biological changes can amplify existing cognitive and sensory differences, particularly for individuals who may have previously relied on masking or compensatory strategies. The episode also revisits the intersection between gender diversity and neurodivergence, exploring how autistic cognitive styles that question inconsistent social rules may contribute to different experiences of gender identity. Aaron further discusses how sensory processing differences, attention, and interoception can intensify experiences of gender dysphoria or body-related awareness. Finally, Aaron answers several frequently asked questions about AuDHD experiences, including the tension between ADHD novelty-seeking and autistic needs for routine, the dynamics of hyperfocus versus task initiation difficulties, fluctuations in social energy, and how masking can sometimes be adaptive depending on context. Throughout the discussion, he emphasises that many challenges attributed to neurodivergence arise from mismatches between individuals and their environments rather than inherent personal deficits. Key Themes & Takeaways• Hormonal Changes & Neurodivergence - Fluctuations during perimenopause and menopause can amplify attention, sensory, and executive functioning differences.• Masking & Late Recognition - Biological or life changes can reduce compensatory capacity, revealing previously masked neurodivergent traits.• Gender & Neurodivergent Thinking - Autistic cognition often questions rigid social rules, including traditional gender binaries.• Sensory Processing & Dysphoria - Attention, sensory sensitivity, and interoception can intensify experiences of gender dysphoria.• Contextual Impairment - Autism support levels and ADHD severity reflect environmental demands as much as individual traits.• AuDHD Internal Conflict - ADHD novelty-seeking can coexist with autistic preferences for routine and predictability.• Hyperfocus & Task Initiation - Interest-based attention allows deep focus on engaging tasks but makes boring tasks difficult to start.• Planning vs Panic - Detailed planning tendencies can interact with ADHD overwhelm, leading to procrastination and last-minute urgency.• Social Energy Fluctuation - Socialising can feel energising or draining depending on stress, sensory load, and available energy.• Different, Not Defective - Many neurodivergent difficulties arise from environmental mismatch rather than inherent personal deficits.Support the showKeywords: AuDHD podcast, autism and ADHD, neurodivergent psychologist, neurodiversity affirming, Howearth Psychology, queer psychologist, autism diagnosis, ADHD awareness, lived experience, neurodivergent mental health, clinical psychology podcast

Send us Fan Mail“When I'm surrounded by people like me, I don't feel disordered. I feel understood.”🎙️ Ep 10: Your Questions Answered – Diagnosis, Self-ID & “Different, Not Defective”Episode SummaryIn this Q&A episode of the AuDHD Psych Podcast, Aaron responds to questions and comments from the community about autism, ADHD, diagnosis, and what it really means to be “different, not defective.” Drawing on both clinical experience and lived AuDHD perspective, he unpacks why being autistic and having an autism spectrum disorder diagnosis are related but not identical concepts, and how context, support, and privilege shape whether traits become impairing or remain simply part of who we are.​Aaron explores why many clearly neurodivergent people never receive a formal diagnosis, highlighting the role of masking, family strategies, and multi-generational awareness in buffering against distress and “disorder” labels. He uses accessible metaphors (like having legs versus having broken legs) to explain the difference between having autistic characteristics and meeting criteria for a disorder, and reframes autism and ADHD as neurotypes that can generate both difficulty and strength depending on the environment.​The conversation moves into self-identification versus formal diagnosis, including the privilege, cost, and gatekeeping surrounding assessment and why Aaron prefers the language of being “self-identified” rather than “self-diagnosed.” He also addresses concerns that self-identification “mocks” those with formal diagnoses, noting that most self-identified autistic and ADHD people he meets have done deep research, grappled with imposter syndrome, and know their traits intimately long before tentatively claiming the label.​Aaron then discusses diagnostic complexity, including how conditions like borderline personality disorder, complex trauma, OCD, and AuDHD can overlap or be misread as one another, especially when clinicians are unfamiliar with neurodivergent presentations. He illustrates how autistic and ADHD traits can be mistaken for personality pathology or compulsions when we don’t yet have a neurodiversity lens, and notes that co-occurrence is also possible — it’s not always either/or.​Finally, Aaron touches on life stage factors such as perimenopause and shifting environmental demands (like starting university) that can dramatically change how ADHD and autistic traits show up, even when the underlying neurotype has been there since childhood. He closes by reflecting on the power of community, the emotional labour of advocacy, and his gratitude for listeners whose engagement and reviews help spread the core message of the podcast: we are different, not disordered.​Key Themes & TakeawaysAutism and ADHD are neurotypes (ways brains work), while “disorder” labels are applied when traits create significant difficulty in current environments.​Being autistic and having an autism spectrum disorder diagnosis are not the same thing; diagnosis is a professional label, not the origin of traits.​Many autistic and ADHD people remain undiagnosed due to masking, high intellect, strong supports, or family strategies that buffer visible impairment.​You can have autistic characteristics without meeting criteria for autism spectrum disorder, much like having legs without having broken legs.​Self-identification is often the result of extensive learning, reflection, and imposter syndrome, not a casual trend or a “mockery” of formal diagnoses.​Diagnostic overlap and misdiagnosis are common, particularly between AuDHD, borderline traits, complex trauma, and OCD-like presentations.​Environment, life stage (e.g., perimenopause), and accumulated coping strategies can change how neurodivergent traits appear over time.​Community, validation, and shared language around neurodivergence can reduce shSupport the showKeywords: AuDHD podcast, autism and ADHD, neurodivergent psychologist, neurodiversity affirming, Howearth Psychology, queer psychologist, autism diagnosis, ADHD awareness, lived experience, neurodivergent mental health, clinical psychology podcast

Send us Fan Mail🎙️ Episode 9: Understanding AuDHD: Late Diagnosis and Diagnostic Levels Episode SummaryIn this episode of The AuDHD Psych Podcast, Aaron Howearth explores one of the most common and emotionally loaded experiences in the neurodivergent community: late diagnosis. Why are so many autistic and ADHD individuals missed in childhood? Why do diagnoses often come after years, or even decades, of anxiety, depression, or misdiagnosis?Drawing from both clinical psychology and lived experience, Aaron explains how traditional diagnostic frameworks were historically built around externalising presentations, often observed in young boys. This has left many neurodivergent individuals, particularly internalisers, high-masking people, and those with higher-than-average intellect, unseen by clinicians.Aaron also discusses diagnostic severity and support levels, challenging the idea that these labels describe fixed traits. Instead, impairment and severity are reframed as dynamic, context-dependent experiences shaped by environment, stress, confidence, and internal states.This episode offers clarity, validation, and a compassionate perspective on how neurodivergent traits are understood and misunderstood within clinical systems.Key Themes & TakeawaysLate Diagnosis Explained - How historical diagnostic criteria centred on visible, external behaviours contributed to generations of missed neurodivergent individuals.Externalising vs Internalising Presentations - Why many autistic and ADHD traits remain unnoticed when distress is internalised, behaviours are masked, or difficulties are cognitively compensated for.Misdiagnosis Pathways - Exploring overlaps with anxiety disorders, OCD, and borderline personality disorder, and how neurodivergent traits can be misinterpreted.The Role of Intellect & Compensation - How higher cognitive ability can obscure challenges, delaying recognition and diagnosis.Mood & Cognitive Functioning - Understanding how anxiety, depression, stress, and overwhelm can amplify or conceal ADHD and autistic characteristics.Rejection Sensitivity & Minority Stress - How social exclusion and misunderstanding influence emotional experiences across neurodivergent lives.Diagnostic Severity & Support Levels - Why ADHD severity and autism support levels are not static identities but reflections of contextual demand.Contextual Impairment - How environment, expectations, stress, and confidence influence functioning and perceived difficulty.Reframing “Impairment” - Moving away from fixed deficit thinking toward a dynamic, neurodiversity-affirming understanding of challenges.Support the showKeywords: AuDHD podcast, autism and ADHD, neurodivergent psychologist, neurodiversity affirming, Howearth Psychology, queer psychologist, autism diagnosis, ADHD awareness, lived experience, neurodivergent mental health, clinical psychology podcastSupport the showKeywords: AuDHD podcast, autism and ADHD, neurodivergent psychologist, neurodiversity affirming, Howearth Psychology, queer psychologist, autism diagnosis, ADHD awareness, lived experience, neurodivergent mental health, clinical psychology podcast

Send us Fan MailThe 7th Circle Audio Version of Ep 9 - If Audio quality is frustrating for you, please ignore this, and listen to the re-corded version Ep 9: Understanding AuDHD: Late Diagnosis and Diagnostic Levels Due to an equipment fault, this recording has extremely poor sound. We apologise to those who have sensory sensitivity to sound. We have identified the lapel mic in question and kindly retired it from service with full honours.We are leaving this version published in case there is a information or a framing of some of the ideas that is helpful to anyone that might not have been included in the re-recording.Edit 21-Feb-2026: as an addition, we've used the intelligences that are artificial to try to improve the sound quality on this copy. We hope it's helpful and more listenable for you all.Thanks for your support!The AuDHD Psych Podcast.Support the showKeywords: AuDHD podcast, autism and ADHD, neurodivergent psychologist, neurodiversity affirming, Howearth Psychology, queer psychologist, autism diagnosis, ADHD awareness, lived experience, neurodivergent mental health, clinical psychology podcast

Send us Fan Mail“If the rule doesn’t make sense, it has no value to me.”🎙️ Ep 8: Labels, their Utility & Lack Thereof Episode SummaryIn this episode of the AuDHD Psych Podcast, Aaron and Uma explore the intersection between gender diversity and neurodiversity, unpacking how autistic and neurodivergent ways of thinking can shape experiences of gender, identity, and self-understanding.Aaron reflects on his own gender experience and how autistic logic, detail orientation, and a rejection of arbitrary social rules influenced his relationship with gender — including why he does not experience gender dysphoria in the same way many gender-diverse people do. The conversation expands into the lived realities of gender dysphoria for neurodivergent people, particularly how sensory differences can amplify discomfort and distress.The episode also dives into what genuinely affirming gender care looks like, highlighting the importance of listening, accessibility, and avoiding harmful assumptions — such as the idea that gender diversity in autistic people is “just a special interest.” Finally, Aaron and Uma reflect on the power of community, advocacy, and shared support, especially for people navigating multiple marginalized identities.Key Themes & TakeawaysGender and biological sex are not the same, and both exist on spectrumsAutistic cognition often questions and rejects illogical social rules, including rigid gender binariesGender dysphoria can be intensified by sensory sensitivities in neurodivergent peopleGender-affirming care goes beyond pronouns to include sensory, environmental, and communication needsViewing autistic gender diversity as a “special interest” is invalidating and harmfulAdvocacy requires energy — and it’s okay to need others to advocate with or for youCommunity is a powerful protective factor, especially at the intersection of neurodivergence and gender diversityOnline spaces can be lifelines for connection, visibility, and belongingSupport the ShowIf you enjoyed this episode, please like, follow, subscribe, or share the podcast. You can also support the show by engaging with us on social media or leaving a review — it really helps more people find these conversations.Keywords: Autism, ADHD, AuDHD, neurodiversity, gender diversity, gender dysphoria, sensory processing, gender-affirming care, advocacy, community, neuroqueering, LGBTQIA+, intersectionalitySupport the showKeywords: AuDHD podcast, autism and ADHD, neurodivergent psychologist, neurodiversity affirming, Howearth Psychology, queer psychologist, autism diagnosis, ADHD awareness, lived experience, neurodivergent mental health, clinical psychology podcast

Send us Fan Mail“The same traits that create difficulty can also be the ones that help us thrive.”🎙️ Episode 7: Understanding The Neurodiversity Affirming Paradigm - Building Balanced BeliefsEpisode SummaryWelcome to Episode 8 of The AuDHD Psych Podcast — hosted by Aaron Howearth, a clinical psychologist and proudly AuDHD human.In this solo episode, Aaron explores the neurodiversity-affirming paradigm and what it truly means to view autism, ADHD, and other neurodivergent experiences as differences rather than disorders. Drawing from clinical practice, lived experience, and real-world examples, Aaron unpacks how neurodivergent characteristics are not inherently strengths or weaknesses — they simply are, and their impact depends on context, environment, and support.Through personal reflections on relationships, conflict, professional problem-solving, and past military service, Aaron illustrates how the same traits can contribute to both challenge and capability. The episode also examines the limits of deficit-based and medical models, the role of diagnosis and privilege, and how stratifying support needs can unintentionally fracture neurodivergent communities.This episode offers a grounded, compassionate perspective on how clinical psychology and neurodiversity affirmation can sit side-by-side, helping individuals build stronger self-concepts, resilience, and community connection.Key Themes & TakeawaysWhat Is the Neurodiversity-Affirming Paradigm? Understanding neurodivergence as natural variation in human cognition — not inherently disordered or deficient.Characteristics Are Context-Dependent The same autistic and ADHD traits can be helpful in one environment and unhelpful in another.Strengths and Struggles Come From the Same Place Detail orientation, impulsivity, and divergent thinking can contribute to both conflict and creativity.Environment Shapes Support Needs It’s not traits alone that create impairment, but the mismatch between a person and their environment.The Limits of Deficit-Based Models How focusing only on what’s “wrong” can harm self-esteem, resilience, and community wellbeing.Diagnosis, Privilege, and Validity Why access to diagnosis requires resources — and why lack of diagnosis does not invalidate neurodivergent identity.Autism Levels and Gatekeeping Exploring how support stratification can unintentionally create hierarchies within the autistic community.Different, Not Less A reminder that neurodivergent people are not broken — just wired differently.Support the ShowIf you enjoyed this episode, please like, follow, subscribe, and share The AuDHD Psych Podcast across your platforms. Your support helps broaden neurodiversity-affirming conversations and reach those who need them.Have questions, reflections, or topic suggestions? We’d love to hear from you — your voices help shape future episodes.Keywords: neurodiversity affirming, AuDHD podcast, autism and ADHD, neurodivergent traits, different not less, autism support needs, ADHD lived experience, deficit vs strengths model, clinical psychology podcast, neurodivergent identity, Howearth PsychologySupport the showKeywords: AuDHD podcast, autism and ADHD, neurodivergent psychologist, neurodiversity affirming, Howearth Psychology, queer psychologist, autism diagnosis, ADHD awareness, lived experience, neurodivergent mental health, clinical psychology podcast

Send us Fan Mail“The new year doesn’t need to fix you — you were already doing your best.”In this reflective New Year’s themed episode of AuDHD Psych, Aaron and Uma explore the quiet space between years — a time often filled with pressure to reset, improve, and reinvent. Through a neurodivergent lens, they unpack why traditional New Year’s resolutions can feel overwhelming or harmful for autistic and ADHD people, and why slow, values-aligned change is often more sustainable. The conversation reframes growth as internal, incremental, and deeply personal, highlighting quiet wins, self-compassion, and progress that doesn’t need to be visible or performative. Rather than chasing arbitrary milestones, this episode invites listeners to honour what worked, question unhelpful beliefs, and move into the new year with curiosity instead of self-criticism.TakeawaysThe New Year can amplify unrealistic expectations, self-judgment, and pressure to change overnightTraditional resolutions often clash with neurodivergent brains that value sustainability, flexibility, and meaningSmall, quiet changes can have a bigger impact than dramatic overhaulsReflecting on what worked is just as important as identifying what didn’tThemes and values can be more supportive than rigid goals or timelinesProgress is not linear, and planning for disruption reduces shame and burnoutSelf-compassion and relationship with self underpin all other goals Growth can be internal, subtle, and still deeply validKeywords AuDHD, neurodivergence, New Year mental health, autistic and ADHD goals, self-compassion, internal growth, quiet progress, neurodivergent goal setting, burnout prevention, reflective practice, New Year pressure, sustainable changeSupport the showKeywords: AuDHD podcast, autism and ADHD, neurodivergent psychologist, neurodiversity affirming, Howearth Psychology, queer psychologist, autism diagnosis, ADHD awareness, lived experience, neurodivergent mental health, clinical psychology podcast

Send us Fan Mail“The absence of a reminder doesn’t mean the love isn’t there.” In this festive episode of AuDHD Psych, Aaron and Uma explore how the holiday season can uniquely impact neurodivergent folk. While celebrations are often framed as joyful and meaningful, they can also bring sensory overload, disrupted routines, social pressure, emotional fatigue, and heightened expectations. Drawing on lived experience and clinical insight, the conversation unpacks masking, burnout, gift-giving stress, overthinking, and the delicate balance between connection and self-preservation. This episode offers permission to slow down, take breaks, set boundaries, and approach the holidays in a way that honours individual needs — reminding listeners that there is no single “right” way to celebrate.TakeawaysDisrupted routines and heightened sensory input during holidays can significantly increase stress for autistic and ADHD individualsOvercommitting socially often leads to burnout, even when connection is genuinely wantedTaking breaks — physical, emotional, or relational — is protective, not rudeMasking can serve a purpose, but conscious, consent-based masking and selective unmasking reduce long-term stressGift-giving and emotional reciprocity can be complicated by differences in communication, expectations, and interpretationThe absence of contact or follow-up is often a reflection of overwhelm, not a lack of careBoundaries, energy awareness, and self-compassion matter more than meeting social idealsKeywords AuDHD, neurodivergence, holidays and mental health, autistic burnout, ADHD emotional regulation, masking and unmasking, sensory overload, social fatigue, boundaries, perfectionism, Christmas stress, neurodivergent wellbeingSupport the showKeywords: AuDHD podcast, autism and ADHD, neurodivergent psychologist, neurodiversity affirming, Howearth Psychology, queer psychologist, autism diagnosis, ADHD awareness, lived experience, neurodivergent mental health, clinical psychology podcast

Send us Fan Mail🎙 Episode 4: Understanding AuDHD: Traits, Truths, & Lived Experience “When I’m told I’m lazy or unmotivated, I start to believe it — and that belief becomes part of who I think I am.”In this episode of AuDHD Psych, Aaron and Uma explore what AuDHD can look like beyond stereotypes and diagnostic labels. Aaron shares his lived experience as an AuDHD clinical psychologist, unpacking why ADHD and autism were historically seen as mutually exclusive, how this has shaped diagnostic practices, and why many people have had parts of their neurodivergence misunderstood, minimised, or overlooked. The conversation examines co-occurrence, diagnostic bias, categorical versus dimensional thinking, and the importance of self-understanding — whether through formal diagnosis or self-identification — as a foundation for meaningful, affirming support.Takeaways:- ADHD and autism frequently co-occur, even though they were historically excluded from being diagnosed together- AuDHD presentations can mask or complicate how characteristics are recognised and supported- Diagnostic systems often miss nuance, particularly when relying on rigid, categorical frameworks- Understanding both strengths and difficulties leads to more effective and affirming support- Identity, diagnosis, and self-identification should be guided by individual goals and needsKeywords: AuDHD, ADHD and autism, neurodivergence, co-occurring diagnoses, self-identification, diagnostic bias, lived experience, neurodiversity-affirming practice, mental health stigma, clinical psychology, ADHD awareness, Lived ExperienceSupport the showKeywords: AuDHD podcast, autism and ADHD, neurodivergent psychologist, neurodiversity affirming, Howearth Psychology, queer psychologist, autism diagnosis, ADHD awareness, lived experience, neurodivergent mental health, clinical psychology podcast

Send us Fan Mail🎙Episode 3: Understanding ADHD: Traits, Truths & Lived Experience“You’re not inherently broken. Your characteristics aren’t disordered — they just don’t always match what the environment demands.”Summary:In this episode, Aaron  takes a deep dive into ADHD through a neurodiversity-affirming lens. He explores what ADHD actually looks like in daily life, why inattentive and internalizing ADHD is so often misunderstood, and how early labels like “lazy” or “unmotivated” shape lifelong beliefs. Aaron unpacks myths, stereotypes, gendered expectations, cultural influences, and the difference between ADHD traits and ADHD disorder. Blending clinical insight with personal stories, he shows how impulsivity, inattention, and hyperactivity can create both challenges and unique strengths — depending entirely on the environment that surrounds them.Takeaways:- ADHD is defined clinically by impulsivity, inattention, and hyperactivity, but lived experience goes far beyond these criteria.- Internalizing ADHD (common in women and quieter kids) often shows up as daydreaming, anxiety, stress, and masking — not disruptive behaviour.- Early messages like “lazy” or “not trying hard enough” become internalized beliefs that shape self-worth. - ADHD traits are not inherently disordered — difficulty appears when the environment demands something mismatched to the person’s natural wiring.- Culture and gender expectations influence how ADHD is expressed and who gets diagnosed.- Social stereotypes and TikTok trends capture tiny fragments of ADHD but often romanticize or oversimplify it.- Impulsivity and inattention can lead to challenges (like overspending) and strengths (like creativity, hyperfocus, career pivots).- Neurodiversity-affirming practice reframes ADHD as a difference, not a defect.- The right environment can turn traits that look “disordered” in one context into superpowers in another.- You are not broken — you simply have a brain that works differently from the societal default.Support the showKeywords: AuDHD podcast, autism and ADHD, neurodivergent psychologist, neurodiversity affirming, Howearth Psychology, queer psychologist, autism diagnosis, ADHD awareness, lived experience, neurodivergent mental health, clinical psychology podcast

Send us Fan Mail🎙 Episode 2: Understanding Autism: Traits, Truths, and Lived Experience "When viewed through the lens of difference, rather than disorder, we often find that it's expectations that warrant changing, not humans."Summary:In this episode of the AuDHD Psych podcast, Aaron Howearth, a clinical psychologist, discusses the diagnosis of autism, its characteristics, and some of the lived experiences of some on the spectrum. The conversation delves into sensory overload, the impact of masking and unmasking, and the phenomenon of autistic burnout. Aaron shares personal insights on communication challenges and reframes neurodivergent strengths, emphasizing that autism is a unique way of being rather than a deficit.Takeaways:- Autism is diagnosed based on social communication differences and restricted patterns of behavior.- Neurodivergent individuals may communicate in a "different dialect" leading to social disconnects.- Sensory overload can be overwhelming, especially in busy environments.- Masking is a common behavior among autistic individuals to fit in socially.- Unmasking can be a liberating experience but is not easy for everyone.- Autistic burnout can manifest as chronic fatigue and withdrawal from social situations.- Scripting can help autistic individuals navigate social interactions more comfortably.- Neurodivergent strengths, such as detail orientation, can be valuable in various contexts.- Distractibility can lead to creativity and beauty in art and life.- Autism should be viewed as a way of being, not a deficit.Support the showKeywords: AuDHD podcast, autism and ADHD, neurodivergent psychologist, neurodiversity affirming, Howearth Psychology, queer psychologist, autism diagnosis, ADHD awareness, lived experience, neurodivergent mental health, clinical psychology podcast

Send us Fan MailWhen viewed through the lens of difference, rather than disorder, we often find that it's expectations that warrant changing, not humans.🎙️ Episode 1: Understanding AuDHD - Lived Experience, Clinical Insight, Different-not-Defective.Episode SummaryWelcome to the first episode of The AuDHD Psych Podcast — hosted by Aaron Howearth, a clinical psychologist, queer, non-binary, and proudly neurodivergent (AuDHD) individual (the co-occurrence of autism and ADHD).In this powerful introductory episode, Aaron explores what it means to live, work, and thrive as an AuDHD person — blending clinical psychology, lived experience, and the neurodiversity-affirming paradigm. Aaron dives into why understanding AuDHD is vital for both clinicians and the neurodivergent community.Aaron shares their personal and professional journey — from 23 years in the Royal Navy to founding Howearth Psychology, a therapeutic space serving neurodivergent and LGBTQIA+ communities. With honesty and humour, Aaron reflects on how their unique perspective helps bridge the gap between traditional clinical psychology and the affirming lens that celebrates difference rather than pathologising it.Key Themes & TakeawaysWhat is AuDHD? — Understanding how autism and ADHD can coexist, despite past diagnostic misconceptions.The “Unhelpful Expressions” Concept — Why neurodivergent traits aren’t inherently disordered, but can express in ways that either help or hinder our goals.Diagnosis Through a Neurodiversity-Affirming Lens — How psychological assessment can empower rather than label.Living Authentically — Aaron’s journey through gender identity, neurodivergence, and finding meaning in community service.Changing Clinical Perspectives — Encouraging fellow psychologists to view neurodivergence through strength-based, person-centred practice.Engaging With The Podcast — Listeners are invited to interact, question, and shape future discussions — from diagnostic frameworks to lived experiences of being AuDHD.Support the showKeywords: AuDHD podcast, autism and ADHD, neurodivergent psychologist, neurodiversity affirming, Howearth Psychology, queer psychologist, autism diagnosis, ADHD awareness, lived experience, neurodivergent mental health, clinical psychology podcast