PODCAST · education
The Modern Phoenix
by Gervase Kolmos
The Modern Phoenix (formerly "It's All Me")In a culture that values logic, urgency, perfection, and sameness, The Modern Phoenix walks a different path: one that honors her unique mind, body and soul. Between information overload, the demands of modern life, and lifetimes of conditioning and "shoulds", it can feel hard for a woman to know and listen to her own wants and needs. We're so busy caring and doing and anticipating and managing that we forget ourselves. We hope there's a better, more balanced, life-giving and feminine way to be a modern woman—to have regulated nervous systems, intuitive solutions to complex problems, and the distinct trust in ourselves and our choices, despite life's curveballs, but we're not sure where to start.That's where I come in. I'm Gervase Kolmos, Inner Transformation Coach and phoenix-in-evolution. I help women learn to trust themselves and be guided by their own inner authority to live with pleasure, authenticity and embodied wisdom. This podcas
Episodes
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When Will It Be Enough? Reclaiming Your Inner 'Enoughness' in a Capitalist World
In this soulful December episode, Gervase pulls back the curtain on her decision to shift The Modern Phoenix Podcast to a monthly publishing schedule and the deeper question underneath it: When will it be enough? From business to motherhood to Black Friday shopping spirals, she explores how...
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I Choreograph My Whole Life Around Joy
What if you planned your day around what lights you up—on purpose? In this raw solo, Gervase shares how a rooftop birthday party became a masterclass in scheduling for joy instead of obligation. From proactively blocking her calendar and rescheduling a client to delegating kid pickup and coaching…
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When I Don't Know What to Do, I Return to Me
When I Don't Know What to Do, I Return to Me is a raw solo where Gervase shares two real-life vignettes—a Zoom with a master lawyer taken from a Costco aisle and a mama-bear moment about her child's bully—to show exactly how she moves from rumination to inner knowing. You'll hear her NPR…
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The Mountain Is Me: What Peru Burned Away (and What It Gave Back)
What if "retreat" isn't a luxury—but spiritual hygiene? In this raw solo, Gervase shares what happened on her Peru retreat in the Sacred Valley: the fire ceremony that helped her release an undercurrent of fear (10% at a time), how she anchored the steadiness of her inner mountain in her body…
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Leaning Back Into Support: Why You Don't Have To Do It Alone
What if the reason you feel so exhausted isn't because you're "not strong enough," but because you've been conditioned to believe you should do it all by yourself? In this raw solo episode, Gervase dismantles the myth of hyper-independence and shares why leaning back—literally and…
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Your Body Tells the Truth of Your Trauma
What if the real story of your trauma isn't the one you keep telling yourself in your head — but the one your body has been holding all along? In this solo episode, G shares how trauma patterns show up in our daily lives (especially as mothers, makers, and women holding it all), and why breaking...
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Renovations, Motherhood & Meeting My Upper Limits on The Phoenix Spiral
What if the chaos in your life wasn't the problem—but the pressure you pile on top of it? In this raw and personal episode, Gervase shares the story of her unexpected home renovation, how it pushed her to the edge of her money stories and nervous system's capacity, and the surprising lessons it...
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How Internalized Capitalism Is Controlling Your Right To Rest And Exist
What if that voice telling you to "be more productive" isn't your inner wisdom but internalized capitalism? Most of us are living with constant pressure to optimize, monetize, and harvest every moment of our lives, and we don't even realize it. In this raw episode, Gervase shares a vulnerable...
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Permission to Be Who You Are: Human Design for Mothers, Makers & Dreamers with Erin Claire Jones
What if the reason you constantly feel drained isn't because you're doing too much, but because you're doing things in a way that goes against your natural design? Most of us are running on empty, trying to force ourselves into systems and rhythms that work for other people—but not for us. This...
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I AM a Multidimensional Woman
Let's be real: the world doesn't need another "put-together" woman who's mastered pretending. It needs you—whole, honest, luminous, messy, intuitive, powerful-as-hell you. That's why we're bringing back this special episode -- straight from the Vault! G goes all in—sharing raw personal stories…
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How to Connect With Your Heart (And Get Out Of Your Head)
What if the reason you struggle to speak from your heart isn't because you don't know what to say, but because you've forgotten how to connect with yourself first? Most of us want deeper connection, but we're so stuck in our heads, running on adrenaline instead of presence. This week, Gervase…
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Dharma, Destiny & Divine Design: A Vedic Astrologer's Guide To Your Life's Path
What if you came to Earth with a divine design and a map of your life already written in the stars? This week, Gervase sits down with Carol Allen, a Vedic astrologer with 34 years of experience to explore how this ancient system can offer profound insights into your life's purpose, relationships,...
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You Are a Soul Having a Human Experience
What if every challenging experience in your life—the difficult relationships, the heartbreak, the family drama—wasn't happening TO you, but was actually teaching you where you still needed to grow? This week, Gervase shares the spiritual psychology framework that has helped her reframe triggers,...
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It's OK To Press The "Easy" Button
What if the key to getting hard tasks done when you're overwhelmed (or just bored!) isn't willpower—but more pleasure? This week, Gervase shares how to work with your nervous system by infusing your daily life with pleasure and intentionality when you want to give up. This isn't about numbing out...
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Stay or Go? Healing Relationship Patterns with Katarina Polonska
For this week's podcast, I brought along a friend… high-performance relationship coach and gender dynamics social scientist, Katarina Polonska! In this episode, we discuss how to make the difficult decision of whether to stay or leave a relationship, how to navigate messy power struggles, and how...
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How Overfunctioning Disconnects You from Your Body and Your Life
Does every task on your to-do list feel as equally urgent and like a threat to your survival? In this week's episode, Gervase dives deep into the pattern of over-functioning that keeps so many women stuck in perpetual stress. You'll learn why your nervous system gets locked in high alert and...
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I Can't Like Myself If I'm Who You Want Me To Be
Tired of contorting yourself into a pretzel so you're liked? Or so you don't make others feel uncomfortable by being YOU? In this week's episode (which is our first ever video podcast!), Gervase dives deep into why women have been conditioned to "perform" and prioritize being liked over being...
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What is Inner Knowing, And Why Will It Change Your Life
The pressure to be more, do more, have more is exhausting, but what if the real problem isn't you… but the unrealistic expectations you've internalized? In this week's episode, G unpacks the invisible forces keeping women stuck in a cycle of never enough, and reveals why Inner Knowing is the path...
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You Can't "Out-think" Your Triggered Body
Have you ever found yourself completely overwhelmed, frustrated, or stuck in a cycle you can't seem to break? You may feel your body tense up, your mind race, or feel paralyzed by indecision. You know you're triggered, but you're not so sure what to do next. In this episode of The Modern Phoenix,...
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REPLAY: A Woman Who Has Her Own Back
Have you ever felt like something in your life, career, or relationships isn't working, and instead of questioning the system, you immediately assume you must be the problem? That there's something wrong with you, that you're not trying hard enough, that if you were just different, everything…
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It's Not Your Job To Make Other People Happy
How often do you hold back, soften your words, or twist yourself into knots just to make sure no one gets upset? Whether it's navigating a tough conversation with your partner, setting boundaries with your kids, or simply taking time for yourself without guilt, many of us have been conditioned to...
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Why Women Don't Like to Cry (And Why You Should Start)
Have you ever been told that you're too emotional? Or do you avoid crying at all costs because you don't want to look weak? In this week's episode, Gervase flips this narrative upside down, offering a powerful reframe that reveals why crying is actually a profound act of healing, as well as an...
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My mental health story & what therapy couldn't "fix"
When it's deeper than talk therapy, it needs a mind-body-soul approach. This week on the Modern Phoenix, Gervase shares insights from her mental health journey turned full-blown personal evolution. Listen in as she opens up about how transitioning from mind-based therapy to soul and body-centered...
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Matrescence: Does becoming a mother change… everything? with Jessie Harrold
The transition into motherhood reshapes not just our roles, but our very beings. In this episode, Gervase Kolmos sits down with Jessi Harold, author of Mothershift, to explore the transformative journey known as matrescence. Jessi shares her insights on how becoming a mother can be both a radical...
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A Mind, Body, Soul Reset for 2025
Navigate the demands of the new year with greater ease, intention, and authenticity. In this week's grounding episode, Gervase invites you to reflect, reset, and reconnect with the cycles of nature around (and within) you. She explores the effect of the Winter Solstice, our changing assignments…
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How my body helped me make up with my husband
What if the key to breaking through relationship conflicts isn't in the talking but in the listening… to your body? In this episode, Gervase reveals how shifting from mind-based strategies to somatic and soul approaches (read: dropping out of the mind and into the body) transformed a weeks-long...
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Breaking the Cycle of Fear-Based Parenting with Wendy Snyder
From threats and punishments to connection - this one goes out to the parents of strong-willed children. In today's episode, Gervase welcomes Wendy Snyder, certified parenting educator and family life coach, to discuss the power of positive, connection-based parenting. Together, they explore the...
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I have to say the right thing or they'll be mad
In this episode, Gervase shines a light on the pervasive belief: "I have to say or do the right thing, or they'll be mad." Gervase explores how this belief can not only trap you in cycles of self-doubt, stress, and rumination but also leads to self-abandonment. Join her as she shares insights…
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It's not okay for me to make mistakes
This week, Gervase takes on a limiting belief that surfaces in the lives of many modern women: it's not okay to be wrong. Learn why this belief leads to fear, power struggles and a lack of authenticity in your life. You'll discover why ruminating and gaslighting are trauma-based activation...
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Meet the Modern Phoenix
Welcome to The Modern Phoenix Podcast! Born from the ashes of the "It's All Me" podcast, The Modern Phoenix is here to guide, inspire, and empower you to rise into the truest, most powerful version of yourself. In this episode, Gervase shares the heart behind the podcast rebrand, what it means to...
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151: Why Permission is Where Healing Begins
On this week's solo episode of the IAM podcast, Gervases seizes inspiration from a recent client interaction, discussing how patterns of disempowerment have left many women with the sneaky survival strategy of hyper-vigilance around the needs of others, and how permission, resource, and pleasure...
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150: PANDAS: Biggest Lessons Learned One Year Later
This week on the IAM podcast, after a full year of navigating her daughter's PANDAS diagnosis,Gervase shares her lived experience of integrating relationship, resource, pleasure, and advocacy into her approach to life and her daughter's health. Listen in as Gervase discusses the importance of...
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149: Break the Burnout Cycle
Join Gervase this week on the It's All Me podcast as she shares how important the practice of resourcing has become in her life, especially in times of stress, like her recent bout with Covid during "Back to School' season. Listen in as she shares why resourcing moment to moment is actually a...
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148: Rejection is Redirection
Welcome back to a new season of the It's All Me podcast! In this solo episode, Gervase shares her personal experiences of integrating a mindset that changed the trajectory of her life, and continues to help her along life's more recent rejections. Listen in as G redefines rejection as an...
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147: Stop Trying to Fix Yourself; Your Body Has a Better Path
This week on the It's All Me podcast, Gervase addresses the impact of going beyond the mind when it comes to healing. Listen in as she discusses the patterns that have led to a wave of traumatized nervous systems in modern society, and the risks we take when we focus on the problem rather than...
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146: Burning it all down…again and again and again with Jeannine Yoder (Audience favorite)
This week on the It's All Me podcast, we are bringing back a much-loved episode with Jeannine Yoder (Kochuba). In this episode, Gervase invites us to sit down with fellow AMDA graduate and New York Times Featured Feminine Leadership & Business Coach Jeannine Kochuba. Gervase and Jeannine share...
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145: Challenge vs Suffering: Rewiring our Brains for Curiosity and Pleasure
This week on the IAM podcast, Gervase is dropping in with a solo episode on the difference between experiencing life's challenges and allowing ourselves to sit in a state of suffering. Sharing her thoughts on the internalized systems that make suffering and martyrdom mindsets normal, Gervase also...
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144. How to Access More Pleasure as a High-Performing Woman
On this week's solo episode of the I AM podcast, Gervase reminds high performing women - like you - of the transformative power of taking time to smell the metaphorical roses, and how it could actually be the most productive move you make in your entire life. Listen in as she shares what healing...
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143: Partnerships the Phoenix Way: How to Cultivate Compassion, Agency, and Pleasure
On this solo episode of the It's All Me podcast, Gervase shares her personal insights on partnership, co-creating safety and trust within your relationship to ask for what you need, and the importance of resourcing and living a life you love as individuals as well as a couple. She shares her...
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142: The Path to Secure Attachment (Even If You're Anxious) with Carly Turner
This week on the IAM podcast, Gervase sits down with Carly Turner, certified CBT & Somatic Attachment Therapist, as they discuss anxious attachment, how it impacts all areas of life, and Carly's personal path toward secure attachment. They dive into the possible roots of anxious attachment, and…
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141: Joy is a Really Good Reason (Replay)
What is your relationship to joy? For a lot of modern women wearing multiple hats and feeling responsible for all sorts of projects and people, joy is the first thing they take off their list when life starts to feel too chaotic. On this episode of the It's All Me podcast, Gervase talks about...
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140: Pillow Talk: Reconnecting to Sensuality in Partnership with Sex Therapist Dr. Viviana
This week on the IAM podcast, Gervase reintroduces relationship and sex therapist Dr. Viviana, who shares how she uses her 20 years of experience to help couples cultivate an underlying current of sensuality in their relationships. Gervase and Dr. Viviana discuss ways to create a sexy environment...
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139: The Black Sheep's Journey: Understanding Generational Trauma with Nick Werber
This week on the podcast, Gervase introduces us to her mentor Nick Werber from the Focalizing Institute, as they discuss generational trauma patterns and how they can shape our childhood, adulthood, and even influence parenting practices. Nick shares specifically how family dynamics create…
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138: Creating Safety, Trust AND Boundaries with Your Kids with Destini Davis and Kiva Schuler
Join G and her guests Destini and Kiva this week on the IAM podcast as they have an in-depth discussion about peaceful parenting and the work necessary to make it a reality. Listen in as they discuss how the trending 'doormat' version of peaceful parenting being highlighted on social media can...
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137: It's Not Okay, And I'm Okay
In this week's solo episode of the It's All Me podcast, Gervase walks us through her lived experience of resourcing and holding space for the duality of being okay in the midst of chaos or stress without shame or blame. Listen in as she talks about acknowledging the range of your experience by...
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136: Self Regulation Is My Family's Way Of Life. Here's Why
On this week's solo episode of the It's All Me podcast, Gervase discusses how she reverse-engineered bad parenting advice and used it as inspiration for her family's practice of self-regulation. Listen in as she shares how we can navigate the challenges and lies that we've been sold by modern...
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135: How to Ask For What You Want (at Home) Pt 2
In this second half of a two-part series, Gervase shines a light on how to get what you want at home. Using two highly common archetypes of women who aren't currently getting their wants or needs met in the home, Gervase shares why this isn't "just the way it is" and how you can take back your...
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134: Understanding Childhood Trauma that Doesn't Feel Like Trauma with Chelsea Green (replay)
In this replay from 2021, Gervase is getting publicly therapized with soulmate and licensed professional counselor Chelsea Green. Chelsea speaks such wisdom about how the systems that we are surrounded by as children, translate into our adult life. The conversation is sprinkled with mic drop…
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133: How to Ask For What You Want (at Work) Pt 1
In a masterclass-style solo episode this week, Gervase dives into how to ask for what you want at your place of work. Listen in as she discusses the three main beliefs of a high-performing woman who isn't getting what she wants, the role of our sympathetic nervous system, the impact of the…
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132: Instead of Being Selfless, Be Your Fullest Self
This week on the It's All Me podcast, Gervase shares a client-inspired discussion about selflessness and the lies we've been fed that have led us into martyrdom, victimhood, and insecurity. Listen in as she sifts through where the feelings of guilt, shame, and the "I don't get to have that"...
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ABOUT THIS SHOW
The Modern Phoenix (formerly "It's All Me")In a culture that values logic, urgency, perfection, and sameness, The Modern Phoenix walks a different path: one that honors her unique mind, body and soul. Between information overload, the demands of modern life, and lifetimes of conditioning and "shoulds", it can feel hard for a woman to know and listen to her own wants and needs. We're so busy caring and doing and anticipating and managing that we forget ourselves. We hope there's a better, more balanced, life-giving and feminine way to be a modern woman—to have regulated nervous systems, intuitive solutions to complex problems, and the distinct trust in ourselves and our choices, despite life's curveballs, but we're not sure where to start.That's where I come in. I'm Gervase Kolmos, Inner Transformation Coach and phoenix-in-evolution. I help women learn to trust themselves and be guided by their own inner authority to live with pleasure, authenticity and embodied wisdom. This podcas
HOSTED BY
Gervase Kolmos
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Frequently Asked Questions
How many episodes does The Modern Phoenix have?
The Modern Phoenix currently has 187 episodes available on PodParley. New episodes are automatically indexed when they're published to the podcast feed.
What is The Modern Phoenix about?
The Modern Phoenix (formerly "It's All Me")In a culture that values logic, urgency, perfection, and sameness, The Modern Phoenix walks a different path: one that honors her unique mind, body and soul. Between information overload, the demands of modern life, and lifetimes of conditioning and...
How often does The Modern Phoenix release new episodes?
The Modern Phoenix publishes regularly with 187 episodes available. Check the episode list for the typical release schedule.
Where can I listen to The Modern Phoenix?
You can listen to The Modern Phoenix on PodParley by clicking any episode. We provide an embedded audio player for direct listening, and you can also subscribe via your preferred podcast app using the RSS feed.
Who hosts The Modern Phoenix?
The Modern Phoenix is created and hosted by Gervase Kolmos.
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