The Morning After’s Audio Dump Podcast

This morning on The Morning After, an all-you-can-eat buffet in Spain recently instituted a fee for throwing up, the KITT car from Knight Rider received a ticket from New York City, a man stole the O off a police station sign on Florida/Not Florida, a tourist got his ass kicked for throwing a rock at a seal in Hawaii, our MVP threatened someone with a machete for a scooter, a woman with blue hair and a leopard-print jacket was arrested after robbing a bank, and loud, horny peacocks are terrorizing a town in Italy. 00:13 - All-you-can-eat buffet institutes a puke fee08:32 - KITT gets a ticket16:02 - Florida/Not Florida22:07 - Tourist beat up for throwing rock at seal26:52 - MVP35:08 - Woman with blue hair and leopard jacket robs bank40:01 - Loud, horny peacocks terrorizing Italian communitySee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, a woman in Traverse City stole wine by sticking it in her vagina, you should stop doing the peace sign in your selfies, two men stole 100 hot dogs on Florida/Not Florida, four of the five statues placed in the middle of a roundabout have been damaged, our MVP sets themselves on fire instead of the building they wanted to set on fire, a 6-foot tall pencil is running for governor in Oregon, and someone in Australia stole 200 pregnant sheep. 00:13 - TC woman puts wine in her vagina09:41 - Stop doing the peace sign in selfies16:14 - Florida/Not Florida23:57 - Statues in middle of roundabout damaged29:52 - MVP36:25 - 6-foot tall pencil running for governor43:20 - Pregnant sheep stolenSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, a doctor fixed a patient’s heart palpitations with a finger in the butt, Video Jimmy joined us to play Florida/Not Florida (and raise his banner), men in Russia are paying to get Cauliflower Ear, our MVP used an employee-only tool to steal Magic: The Gathering cards, we had an update on the man that stole and swallowed $700,000 Tiffany earrings, and The Royal Navy has to rethink their new uniforms for female officers. 00:13 - Heart palpitations fixed with finger05:33 - Florida/Not Florida14:58 - Men paying for Cauliflower Ear20:47 - MVP28:15 - MA Update33:28 - The Royal Navy rethinking uniformsSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, a woman stabbed her hairstylist on ‘Why You Mad, Bro?,’ there’s a shrine you can pray to for concert tickets, a man was searching for his muse and she was searching for him on Missed Connections, a woman found two alligators fighting on her porch, our MVP was operating a drone while drunk (along with a couple of other things), and we wrapped up the week with a few Things We Missed. 00:13 - Why You Mad, Bro?09:11 - Shrine to pray for concert tickets14:44 - Missed Connections24:23 - Two alligators fighting28:10 - MVP36:17 - Things We MissedSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, a distillery in Albuquerque had their fence stolen, Happy Meals are better with beer, Teagan joined us for Unqualified Love Advice, we had an update on the woman that has been arrested multiple times in South Carolina, our MVP was a 28-year old posing as a high school student, the Half-Ass Bar was robbed, and a man didn’t have his third penis removed, but he did have a third of his penis removed. 00:13 - Distillery has fence stolen08:15 - Happy Meals are better with beer13:59 - Unqualified Love Advice - Seg. 121:15 - Unqualified Love Advice - Seg. 226:04 - MA Update31:50 - MVP40:05 - Half-Ass Bar robbed45:56 - What Matt read vs. the real headlineSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, a ‘poop-nami’ is closing beaches in California, people are experiencing eye injuries after opening their Thermoses, a woman broke into a home to steal a Dr. Pepper on Florida/Not Florida, a well-known Canadian fiddle player is suing Google for labeling him a sex offender, our MVP tried to chase a kid on a bike down with her car, the Pope also struggles getting answers from customer service, and a robot caused a flight delay in Oakland. 00:13 - ‘Poop-nami’ closes beaches in CA06:59 - Eye injuries from a Thermos13:41 - Florida/Not Florida22:49 - Canadian fiddle player suing Google29:45 - MVP36:13 - Pope has customer service problems42:44 - Robot causes flight delaySee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, more men are getting penis filler, a meme artist in Seattle held a funeral for a long-closed Taco Bell, a man drove a stolen car to the police station on Florida/Not Florida, people in China are making digital versions of their exes, our MVP bit his dad’s thumb off during a hotly contested darts match, teens in the UK are bypassing age gates by drawing mustaches on their faces, and a couple setup a website for people to sign up to ‘crash’ your wedding. 00:13 - More men getting penis filler08:32 - Funeral for closed Taco Bell15:03 - Florida/Not Florida22:03 - People making digital versions of exes28:08 - MVP37:09 - Teens drawing mustaches on their faces43:07 - Couple sets up site for ‘wedding crashers’See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, a scorned woman set her boyfriend’s house on fire, Video Jimmy from the Great Lakes Loons joined us to play Florida/Not Florida, the man that set the record for pulling a vehicle with his penis has now also done it while on fire, our MVP hit a soon-to-be former delivery driver that is accused of hitting someone with his car for not tipping, a man is accused of having sex with a trash can, and an escaped ‘zebra’ wasn’t a zebra at all. 00:13 - Woman sets boyfriend’s house on fire05:04 - Florida/Not Florida14:10 - Man pulls car with penis while on fire19:36 - MVP26:54 - Man has sex with garbage can33:28 - Escaped ‘zebra’ wasn’t a zebraSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, a stripper fired from her job is accused of hitting her manager with a pole, a man spent the night in a Best Buy to be first in line for Pokemon cards, someone got ‘chub shamed’ on Missed Connections, things got wild during a Saugatuck City Council meeting, our MVP has had enough of ‘6 7,’ a woman stabbed a man for not taking her out to dinner, and we wrapped up the week with a few Things We Missed. 00:13 - Stripper beats manager with pole08:03 - Man sleeps in Best Buy for Pokemon14:27 - Missed Connections23:34 - Saugatuck City Council Meeting29:28 - MVP36:43 - Jesus, lady!41:14 - Things We MissedSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, a woman is accused of smearing poop on her neighbor’s van and putting it in mailboxes, a ‘frequent flyer’ was arrested for shoplifting twenty minutes after being released from jail for shoplifting, Teagan joined us for Unqualified Love Advice, a new TiKTok Trend has people making ‘fart salad,’ attorney Jason Gower joined us to answer your legal questions, and a woman pulled down her pants before slapping her orthodontist. 00:13 - Woman accused of smearing poop on van09:31 - ‘Frequent flyer’ arrested for shoplifting14:01 - Unqualified Love Advice - Seg. 121:01 - Unqualified Love Advice - Seg. 226:51 - TikTok Trend32:55 - Jason Gower - Seg. 140:59 - Jason Gower - Seg. 252:56 - Jason Gower - Seg. 361:40 - Jason Gower - Seg. 469:03 - Woman pulls pants down at orthodontistSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, a shirtless man forced a teenager to eat a Gusher before he’d let him leave a public bathroom, a woman threw a stick of dynamite at her sleeping boyfriend, an off-duty police officer lost his gun inside a gaming center on Florida/Not Florida, a man let a cobra slide up his pant leg while he was on vacation, our MVPs rode a lawnmower into Target and took leaf blowers into Culvers, the Sperm Racing World Cup is looking for competitors, and a pastor that wrote a book about loving his wife had multiple wives. 00:13 - Shirtless man makes teen eat Gusher08:25 - Woman throws stick of dynamite at sleeping boyfriend13:58 - Florida/Not Florida21:42 - Man lets cobra slide up his pant leg28:15 - MVP36:10 - Sperm Racing World Cup44:53 - Pastor has multiple wivesSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, a man slapped a Subway employee on ‘Why You Mad, Bro?,’ a woman fell into a vault toilet in the Australian Outback, we were searching for a man named Harry Johnson on Missed Connections, another woman had her driveway ‘stolen,’ our MVP was dancing naked in an Aldi, a thief’s mode of getaway transportation was a tricycle, and we wrapped up the week with a few Things We Missed. 00:13 - Why You Mad, Bro?09:25 - Woman falls in vault toilet14:20 - Missed Connections22:20 - Another ‘stolen’ driveway28:44 - MVP35:51 - Man uses tricycle as getaway vehicle39:21 - Things We MissedSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, a man in Thailand set a forest fire out of boredom, an upcoming naturalist wants to remind you that it isn’t for nudists, we had an update on the matador that was gored in the butthole, our MVP robbed a man while wearing an ankle monitor, a fugitive monkey burglar is terrifying residents in Brazil, and this Saturday is Potato Saturday in Calgary! 00:13 - Bored man sets forest fires06:15 - Naturalist event isn’t for nudists12:46 - MA Update19:46 - MVP27:07 - Fugitive monkey burglar32:34 - Potato Saturday in CalgarySee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, a temple makes you drink a cow urine and feces cocktail before entering, a man dropped a bag of drugs while walking into court, a Michael Myers mannequin got shot up on Florida/Not Florida, two pilots were reprimanded for their plane-drawn penises, our MVP is a soon-to-be former substitute teacher that was twerking in class, a man sold a watch he thought was fake (it wasn’t) and he was charged with a crime, and a dumpster company dumped a dumpster in someone’s driveway after they didn’t pay. 00:13 - Cow urine and feces cocktail09:11 - Man drops bag of drugs13:48 - Florida/Not Florida21:26 - Pilots reprimanded for plane-drawn penises27:45 - MVP36:17 - Man sold ‘fake’ watch41:52 - Dumpster company dumps dumpsterSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, a man in Florida was caught masturbating in a parking garage by an IT worker, scientists are trying to make sheep burp and fart less, a man stole 20 packages of sausage on Florida/Not Florida, a matador was recently gored right in the butthole, our MVP singed his eyebrows while stealing gas, a man slapped his neighbor for pounding his schnitzel too loud, and a female bodybuilder gets paid to make tap out. 00:13 - Man caught masturbating in parking garage08:44 - Burpless and fartless sheep15:09 - Florida/Not Florida22:13 - Matador gets gored in butthole28:08 - MVP35:47 - Man was pounding his schnitzel too loud40:08 - Female bodybuilder makes men tap outSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, a farmer in the UK is going to start breeding less attractive cows, Video Jimmy from the Great Lakes Loons joined us to play Florida/Not Florida, we had an update on the guys accused to trashing luxury vehicles while dressed like bears, our MVP was replacing LEGOs with dry pasta, a zoo in China recently admitted that their elephants were just employees in elephant costumes, and restaurants are using AI to scan your face and tell you what you should order. 00:13 - Farmer breeding less attractive cows05:30 - Florida/Not Florida12:26 - MA Update18:54 - MVP27:33 - Employees in elephant costumes33:17 - Restaurants are using AI to scan your faceSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, a man is offering to join you on your bucket list vacations at IllBeYourFriend.com, a man keeping track of how many times he’s evaded police has been arrested, we went mushroom hunting on Missed Connections, Rachel Geddes joined us to talk about this Sunday’s Great Lakes Bay Area Celebrity Game, our MVP was masturbating in his van next to other motorists, a car manufacturer in China owns the patent for passenger seat toilets, and we wrapped up the week with a few Things We Missed. 00:13 - IllBeYourFriend.com08:57 - Man keeps track of evading police14:23 - Missed Connections22:58 - Rachel Geddes29:36 - MVP38:48 - Passenger seat toilets44:54 - Things We MissedSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, rumored genitalia thefts had Zanzibar on edge, a man had a metal chopstick stuck in his throat for eight years, Teagan joined for Unqualified Love Advice, prisons in the UK are reminding guards not to have sex with inmates, our MVP faked a robbery for bail money, two pilots are accused of meowing on what-should-be an emergency channel, and Michael Priebe and Terry Hessbrook joined us to discuss this Sunday’s Great Lakes Bay Area Celebrity Game to benefit the B#4 Foundation. 00:13 - Genital thefts in Zanzibar08:53 - Man with metal chopstick stuck in his throat13:59 - Unqualified Love Advice - Seg. 121:38 - Unqualified Love Advice - Seg. 227:34 - Don’t have sex with inmates33:16 - MVP40:09 - Pilots meowing on emergency channel47:23 - Great Lakes Bay Area Celebrity GameSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, police did a welfare check on a 91-year old woman only to discover she was just playing video games, a new store ran by AI forgot to schedule staff members, a woman gave police a Barnes & Noble gift card on Florida/Not Florida, your Mii can fart in a new Nintendo game, our MVP shot up a bar after his card was declined, we introduced a new featured called ‘Genius, but Illegal,’ and a vacuum cleaner is running for mayor of a UK town. 00:13 - 91-year old just playing video games08:38 - AI-ran store forgets to schedule staff13:49 - Florida/Not Florida22:37 - Mii can fart in new Nintendo game28:12 - MVP35:46 - Genius, but Illegal41:13 - Vacuum cleaner running for mayorSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, a man is on the run after punching his coworker in the face one minute into his shift, a man wearing a cow costume stabbed a family member, a man showed both his butt and anus at a fast food restaurant on Florida/Not Florida, a former Arena Football League player is standing outside the Detroit Lions’ offices in hopes that he’ll get a tryout, our MVP shot a man over Pokemon cards, a beaver is accused of stealing wood, and a bus driver has lost his job after letting a woman sit on his lap. 00:13 - Man punches coworker one minute into shift08:33 - Man in cow costume stabs family member14:48 - Florida/Not Florida24:09 - AFL player standing outside Lions’ offices31:36 - MVP39:23 - Beaver accused of stealing wood44:37 - Bus driver fired after letting woman sit on his lapSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, a man made a pipe bomb for ‘entertainment purposes,’ Video Jimmy from the Great Lakes Loons joined us to play Florida/Not Florida, a woman driving a Supra thought Florida’s Super Speeder Law didn’t apply to her, our MVP was on a dating app during a standoff, a new TikTok Trend has people eating mini clay pots, and you can now talk to AI Jesus for just $1.99. 00:13 - Pipe bomb for ‘entertainment purposes’06:28 - Florida/Not Florida15:48 - Supra vs. Super Speeder Law21:22 - MVP31:19 - TikTok Trend39:07 - Talk to AI Jesus for $1.99See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, a new campaign wants you to ‘Beat Off Cancer,’ the manager of a sober bar got a DUI, a man knew the best way to cook an eggplant on Missed Connections, food delivery robots are getting attacked in Philadelphia, our MVP attacked someone while waiting for a job interview, a woman’s cough was caused by her missing nose ring, and we wrapped up the week with a few Things We Missed. 00:13 - Beat Off Cancer07:56 - Sober bar manager got DUI12:43 - Missed Connections23:28 - Delivery robots attacked in Philly29:27 - MVP38:39 - Nose ring trapped in lung43:53 - Things We MissedSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, you shouldn’t put sugar on your butthole to treat your hemorrhoids, a pastor in the UK did a baptism as wrong as you possibly could, Teagan joined us for Unqualified Love Advice, two guys got drunk and stole 96 bananas from a convenience store, our MVPs picked up a dead alligator from the side of the road and strapped it to the roof of the car, a woman has been accused of stealing electricity from her neighbor while he was hospitalized, and a world record for the most Michael Myers in one place was set recently. 00:13 - Don’t put sugar on your butthole08:48 - Baptism goes very wrong in the UK14:37 - Unqualified Love Advice - Seg. 121:55 - Unqualified Love Advice - Seg. 226:20 - Two drunks stole 96 bananas32:53 - MVP42:12 - Neighbor stealing electricity49:03 - Michael Myers world recordSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, a woman tried to bite off her husband’s tongue on ‘Why you mad, bro?,’ a Pokemon Go player was disqualified from a tournament for ‘unsportsmanlike conduct,’ a man got stuck in a chimney on Florida/Not Florida, a man stole hockey sticks in what’s being described as ‘the most Canadian crime ever,’ our MVP told police he speeds all the time, the Internet is debating whether or not a man with a massive McDonalds order should have gone inside, and an angry beaver had to be wrangled in New Jersey. 00:13 - Why you mad, bro?08:18 - Pokemon Go player disqualified15:21 - Florida/Not Florida24:31 - Hockey stick theft29:29 - MVP38:08 - Massive McDonalds order44:17 - Angry beaver wrangled in NJSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, a school board member is on the outs after telling a teenage student she’s ‘hot,’ fatal diarrhea is something we should be more concerned about, the Saginaw Spirit’s Dillon Clark joined us to play Florida/Not Florida, a dominatrix will no longer participate in fart fetishes, our MVP took cocaine to ‘The Happiest Place on Earth,’ a family found a skull during their Easter egg hunt, and a woman found a man’s sexual conquests written on a wall during a home renovation. 00:13 - Board member tells student she’s ‘hot’09:19 - Fatal diarrhea14:46 - Florida/Not Florida24:36 - Dominatrix won’t do fart fetishes29:40 - MVP38:44 - Skull found during Easter egg hunt43:11 - Sexual conquests written on wallSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, Magnus Carlsen took a selfie with an opponent before reporting her for having a phone, Video Jimmy from the Great Lakes Loons joined us to play Florida/Not Florida, Jonathan the tortoise recently got wrapped up in a crypto scheme, our MVPs were scrolling their phones when their kid walked into a wolf exhibit, Japan hosted it’s Fertility Festival over the weekend, and a new wax statue of Taylor Swift is getting round-the-clock security. 00:13 - Magnus Carlsen rats out opponent06:19 - Florida/Not Florida14:43 - Tortoise caught in crypto scheme21:44 - MVP30:26 - Japanese Fertility Festival38:11 - Taylor Swift wax statueSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, a police officer in Florida has to go to counseling after farting in a coworker’s face, a woman broke into a chicken coop to rob two people living there, a woman was looking for a man with a flask to fill on Missed Connections, a woman tried to rekindle her romance with her husband by setting his house on fire, our MVP drove a stolen vehicle to a court hearing regarding a stolen vehicle, a man asked a judge to give him an extra six months in prison to finish up a few projects, and we wrapped up the week with a few Things We Missed. 00:13 - Officer farts in coworker’s face08:21 - Woman breaks into chicken coop13:47 - Missed Connections22:11 - Woman sets husband’s house on fire28:04 - MVP35:39 - Man asks for six more months in prison39:30 - Things We MissedSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, a woman in Detroit is accused of having sex while on a Zoom court hearing, googly eyes can keep birds away from your food containers, Teagan joined us for Unqualified Love Advice, a man is accused of showing his penis to a woman that didn’t want to see it, our MVP claimed to be both the 36th president AND an alien, a new TikTok Trend has people skipping shampoo, and you can no longer trust your Mount Everest guides. 00:13 - Woman having sex on Zoom08:11 - Googly eyes keep birds away14:31 - Unqualified Love Advice - Seg. 121:15 - Unqualified Love Advice - Seg. 226:20 - Man shows penis to woman that didn’t want to see it32:47 - MVP41:16 - TikTok Trend47:58 - Don’t trust your Mount Everest guideSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, a man chased a dog walker with garden shears on ‘Why You Mad, Bro?,’ we had an update on the teenager accused of putting googly eyes on a statue, a man was on the hunt for MILFs on Missed Connections, a woman has been awarded $14 million after eating ice cream with nails in it, our MVP decided to mess with the wrong Costco customer, a kangaroo wearing jeans is on the loose in Wisconsin, and we wrapped up the week with a few Things We Missed. 00:13 - Why You Mad, Bro?09:16 - MA Update14:57 - Missed Connections23:45 - $14 million for eating ice cream with nails29:23 - MVP36:57 - Kangaroo wearing jeans missing41:56 - Things We MissedSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, a man was arrested for the 98th time with a bong built into the dash of his truck, a squirrel with a vape is a good reminder to throw away your vapes properly, Teagan joined us for Unqualified Love Advice, a woman’s ‘banana shoes’ led to a giraffe attack, attorney Jason Gower joined us to answer your legal questions, and a man is going to prison for creating fake music using AI and then streaming it millions of times with bots.00:13 - Man arrested for 98th time with bong in dash06:48 - Squirrel with vape a reminder to throw them away12:23 - Unqualified Love Advice - Seg. 118:18 - Unqualified Love Advice - Seg. 224:32 - Woman in banana shoes attacked by giraffes30:30 - Jason Gower - Seg. 139:40 - Jason Gower - Seg. 247:36 - Jason Gower - Seg. 358:35 - Jason Gower - Seg. 466:06 - AI music streamed by botsSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, a tofu truck tipped over weeks ago and no one is cleaning it up, a cop has lost her job after selling feet content online while wearing her uniform, a man used the ‘power and authority of Jesus’ to rob a bank on Florida/Not Florida, a man finally passed his drivers test after over 100 attempts, our MVP was asking people for their pee (oh, and he had a gun in his pants, too), a man nicknamed The Baron recently set a record for pulling a truck with his nipples, and over-the-top twerking is off limits this spring break!00:13 - Tofu truck overturned and no one wants it07:19 - Cop fired for selling feet content in uniform14:40 - Florida/Not Florida22:08 - Man passes driver’s test after over 100 tries29:31 - MVP38:14 - Man sets World Record pulling vehicle with nipples43:53 - Over-the-top-twerking is off limitsSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, a bill in Minnesota could make it legal for nursing homes to sell alcohol, some are ‘forest bathing’ to get away from everything happening in the world, the Saginaw Spirit’s Dillon Clark joined us to play Florida/Not Florida, sword yoga is a thing, our MVPs stole a car and they brought their kitten with them, a woman is in a throuple with her boyfriend and a tram, and Texas will no longer make signs for the town of Bug Tussle.00:13 - MN wants to sell alcohol in nursing homes07:23 - Forest bathing12:32 - Florida/Not Florida21:58 - Sword yoga27:36 - MVP35:55 - Woman in throuple with boyfriend and tram44:12 - Bug Tussle won’t get any new signsSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, a 1,300 pound dairy cow washed ashore following flooding in Oregon, a man was really bad at bank robberies on Florida/Not Florida, three bison in Poland were killed when they were hit by Bison the train, our MVP booked two different rentals on AirBNB and peed on everything inside, we had an update on the card stealing priest in Pittsburgh, and Delaware has the most UFO sightings in the country.00:13 - 1,300 pound dairy cow washes ashore07:31 - Florida/Not Florida16:08 - Three bison killed by train named Bison21:45 - MVP30:19 - MA Update38:11- Delaware has the most UFO sightings See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, the country of Malta will pay you nearly $30,000 NOT to drive, Wheelie Nelson needs a new set of wheels, a woman met a man that resembled her father on Missed Connections, a man caused $240,000 in damage at a glass museum, our MVPs were caught fooling around on a school bus, a self-proclaimed ‘human 3D printer’ makes her prints out of carrots, and we wrapped up the week with a few Things We Missed.00:13 - Malta will pay you NOT to drive07:05 - Wheelie Nelson12:30 - Missed Connections21:36 - $240k in damage at glass museum27:44 - MVP34:34- Human 3D printer using carrots39:54 - Things We MissedSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, glitter lung is a real medical condition, a man is making money off a pothole in New York, Teagan joined us for Unqualified Love Advice, a man was arrested for DUI while riding an electric unicycle, our MVP peed in a sink while doing work in someone’s apartment, Punch The Monkey has a girlfriend, and a man was chased into the ocean by police on paddle boards.00:13 - Glitter lung is a real thing08:14 - Man making money off pothole in NY13:04 - Unqualified Love Advice - Seg. 120:02 - Unqualified Love Advice - Seg. 225:23 - Man arrested for DUI on unicycle31:37- MVP38:08 - MA Update43:17 - Man chased by police on paddle boardsSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, a man fell into a hole and onto a bear, someone stole thousands of pounds of walnuts, a man tried to pay his bail with counterfeit money, we learned that sharks have friends, our MVP stabbed his buddy after being accused of being too good with women, a patient is refusing to leave their hospital bed, and a business in China put live hamsters in a claw machine.00:13 - Man falls into hole and onto bear06:20 - Someone stole thousands of pounds of walnuts11:57 - Florida/Not Florida19:42 - Sharks have friends24:54 - MVP33:24 - Patient refusing to leave hospital38:56 - Live hamsters in claw machineSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, we celebrated the 20th anniversary of the Alabama Leprechaun, we learned that marrying your cousin will continue to be legal in Florida, the Saginaw Spirit’s Dillon Clark joined us for Florida/Not Florida, a woman was sneezing out maggots after fly larvae got trapped in her deviated septum, our MVPs had sex in a graveyard next to a church, and AI is suggesting a clove of garlic in the butt could help your immune system.00:13 - Alabama Leprechaun 20th anniversary08:30 - Marrying your cousin still legal in FL14:21 - Florida/Not Florida22:54 - Gruesome Story, Peppy Music29:03 - MVP35:03 - AI suggesting a clove of garlic in the buttSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, we learned about the vendors that will be at this year’s Swingathon, a man tried to steal a septic tank (twice) on Florida/Not Florida, people are now churning butter on their runs, our MVPs stole pallets of sex toys, a woman reporting on a bear attack had a bear walk into her live shot, and a robot was ‘detained’ in Japan for scaring an elderly woman.00:13 - Vendors at Swingathon06:25 - Florida/Not Florida14:00 - People churning butter on runs20:08 - MVP27:51 - Bear walks into reporter’s live shot32:19 - Robot ‘detained’ in ChinaSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, a new TikTok Trend may be ‘wreaking havoc’ on vaginas, a man is suing a New York City taqueria over their spicy salsa, an old painter is looking for somewhere to put his brush on Missed Connections, we introduced you to the most followed pig on Instagram, our MVP gave police a bag of Q-tips and batteries instead of her license, Iowans have the biggest penises, and we wrapped up the week with a few Things We Missed.00:13 - TikTok Trend07:13 - Tourist suing over hot salsa12:34 - Missed Connections21:07 - Most followed pig on Instagram26:15 - MVP33:46 - Iowans have big penises39:12 - Things We MissedSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, a woman’s boyfriend pulled a screw from her head after a doctor said it was nothing to worry about, a man became the first in the UK to pull a car with his testicles, Teagan joined us for Unqualified Love Advice, we had an update on the man with a Thermos is in butt, our MVP is a soon-to-be former priest accused of stealing baseball cards, a naked burglar is terrorizing Virginia, and clouds may be to blame for all the bear attacks in Japan.00:13 - Screw pulled from woman’s head08:12 - UK man pulls car with testicles13:12 - Unqualified Love Advice - Seg. 119:40 - Unqualified Love Advice - Seg. 225:22 - MA Update31:08 - MVP41:03 - Naked man burglarizes homes in VA46:21 - Clouds to blame for bear attacksSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, a man in Florida was arrested for ‘lifting’ lapdances, a woman declared brain dead was jolted back to life after the ambulance hit a pothole, a man claimed to be God after taking mushrooms on Florida/Not Florida, users of the anti-masturbation app Quitter are afraid their info has been leaked, our MVP is a now former bishop that was stealing money from the church to hire prostitutes, a man went to the hospital when he woke up with blue skin, and cow gallstones are more valuable than gold.00:13 - Man accused of ‘lifting’ lap dances07:04 - Pothole brings woman back to the life10:36 - Florida/Not Florida17:55 - Anti-masturbation app Quittr hacked23:05 - MVP31:59 - Man wakes up with blue skin36:19 - Cow gallstones more valuable than goldSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, we’ve got more weights in fish (this time in Texas), a man finally had the chance to take advantage of a sign in an oyster restaurant, the Saginaw Spirit’s Dillon Clark joined us to play Florida/Not Florida, ‘crocodiles are everywhere’ after flooding in Australia, our MVP left her kid at Universal Studios City Walk to go to the bar, 600 tubs of French onion dip showed up at a Mac and cheese kiosk in Philadelphia, and you can now buy a Cameo from a head of lettuce.00:13 - More weights in fish07:41 - Man takes advantage of sign at restaurant12:24 - Florida/Not Florida19:56 - Crocodiles are everywhere in Australia24:19 - MVP33:36 - 600 tubs of French onion dip39:30 - Get a Cameo from a head of lettuceSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, the UK’s Swingathon is adding some fun new features in 2026, a woman broke into a home and ate Fruity Pebbles on Florida/Not Florida, a teacher was caught peeing in a coffee can in the classroom, our MVP was a prisoner that snuck away from his duties at a charity event to have sex with a woman in a porta potty, scientists in Japan have developed an onion that won’t make you cry, and neighbors called police on a woman with noisy frogs in her backyard.00:13 - Swingathon adds new features in 202607:26 - Florida/Not Florida13:19 - Teacher caught urinating in coffee can20:25 - MVP27:41 - Onion that won’t make you cry33:46 - Police called for loud frogs in backyardSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, we introduced you to Chadillac and Manda Saurus Rexx, a flag with a bear on it will keep its penis, we went to the Dollar Tree on Missed Connections, Jared and Preston from the Toughest Monster Truck Tour joined us in studio, our MVP peed in the back of a police cruiser before flooding her cell, a new TikTok Trend has people drinking hot water, and we wrapped up the week with a few Things We Missed.00:13 - Chadillac and Manda Saurus Rexx09:37 - Bear flag will keep penis14:53 - Missed Connections24:19 - Toughest Monster Truck Tour Interview33:46 - MVP41:18 - TikTok Trend46:40 - Things We MissedSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, someone stole bowling balls off a professional bowler’s porch, ‘Carrotmaxxing’ is a way to give you a tan without the sun, Salty Sandy collects excess salt off the roads for her own personal use, our MVP filmed himself on his dash cam committing a crime, we now have a solution for your small balls, and a woman is suing the Dodgers after she was hit by a Buzzball.00:13 - Stolen bowling balls07:28 - ‘Carrotmaxxing’12:50 - Salty Sandy16:56 - MVP24:25 - Small balls solution29:05 - Woman hit by Buzzball at baseball gameSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, a taxi driver assaulted a man on ‘Why you mad, bro?,’ being a good samaritan isn’t always good, a man wearing an ankle monitor broke into his neighbor’s house on Florida/Not Florida, someone showed up drunk to their driving test in the UK, our MVP was caught damaging license plate readers by a license plate readers, police in Washington had to deal with a determined beaver, and thieves stole over $100,000 in Pokemon cards from an NYC shop.00:13 - Why you mad, bro?09:04 - Being a Good Samaritan isn’t always good15:49 - Florida/Not Florida23:16 - Someone showed up drunk to driving test30:11 - MVP37:30 - Determined beaver43:26 - Thieves steal very expensive cardsSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, a man was stuck in quicksand for days before anyone found him, painting penises around potholes in the UK may soon be a crime, the Saginaw Spirit’s Dillon Clark joined us for Florida/Not Florida, Punch The Monkey’s orangutan friend is sold out at IKEAs all over the world, our MVP showed up to his job as a driving instructor for times over the legal limit, a man in Russia went to prison instead of finding a job, and scientists have created a song that makes a certain alcohol taste better.00:13 - Man stuck in quicksand for days06:41 - Painting penises around potholes could lead to charges11:56 - Florida/Not Florida22:23 - Punch The Monkey’s friend sold out28:26 - MVP35:10 - Man goes to prison instead of finding a job40:56 - Scientists create song to make booze taste betterSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, LA Metro recently introduced new ‘Ride The D’ t-shirts and they sold out immediately, Video Jimmy from the Great Lakes Loons joined us to play Florida/Not Florida, a woman was ticketed for having her phone in her right hand (she doesn’t have one), our MVP scanned taco seasoning packets to steal sports cards, a stolen bike led to the breakup of a drug ring, and an exploding phone stopped a dog attack.00:13 - ‘Ride The D’ t-shirts06:23 - Florida/Not Florida15:55 - Woman without hand ticketed for phone in hand21:16 - MVP31:23 - Stolen bike leads to drug ring arrests38:17 - Exploding phone stops dog attackSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, we had multiple frying pan attacks, a man celebrated the loss of his testicle with a Zoom party and a penis-shaped run, a woman left underwear in a washing machine on Missed Connections, Boner Bears Chocolate Syrup has been recalled, our MVP has been accused of vomit vandalism, fatbergs are producing poo balls in Australia, and we wrapped up the week with a few Things We Missed.00:13 - Multiple frying pan attacks08:12 - Man celebrates loss of testicle13:11 - Missed Connections22:02 - Boner Bears Chocolate Syrup recalled27:30 - MVP35:58 - Fatbergs producing poo balls41:42 - Things We MissedSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This morning on The Morning After, a woman ate cocaine she had stored in her ‘jail purse,’ there was more controversy at a camel beauty contest, Teagan joined us for Unqualified Love Advice, we had an update on the PB4WEGO license plate in New York, attorney Jason Gower joined us to answer your legal questions, and comedian Rob Little joined us before his show this Saturday night at the State Theatre in Bay City!00:13 - Woman ate cocaine from ‘jail purse’07:58 - Camel beauty contest controversy15:16 - Unqualified Love Advice - Seg. 120:50 - Unqualified Love Advice - Seg. 225:21 - MA Update29:28 - Jason Gower - Seg. 136:38 - Jason Gower - Seg. 248:17 - Jason Gower - Seg. 357:40 - Jason Gower - Seg. 465:26 - Rob LittleSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.