The Reformed Tired Girls Club Podcast

I skipped Thanksgiving one time and somehow ended up getting dragged on Facebook. So naturally, we're talking about boundaries.In today's episode, we're chatting about what happens when you finally realize you're an adult, you have agency over your life, and you don't actually have to keep putting yourself in situations that are bad for your mental health just because they're "family."I share the story of the time I decided to stop attending family holidays and the very public reaction that followed, and yes, I brought receipts. Plus, we're getting into why boundaries can be so dang hard and how trauma helps explain behavior but absolutely does NOT excuse it.Because your body can't heal in the environment that made it sick in the first place. And sometimes protecting your peace comes with a little (or a lot) of backlash.

When “I have a headache I can’t go out” is actually code for: I’m depressed and there’s no way I’m going to try and explain this to you…In today's episode, we're talking about the taboo subject of depression, the excuses we make when we don't know how to tell people what's really wrong, and how mental health has a way of bleeding into your social & work life.I also tell the story of a stranger who noticed I wasn't okay when I was working as a server. And how her small act of kindness has stuck with me almost a decade later.Plus, we’re chatting about the things that helped me manage depression in the short term, and the one surprising change that ultimately made it disappear completely. Because as much as I thought depression was just something I had to live with, it turns out that wasn’t true.

Desperate times call for desperate measures. Or in my case, obsessively counting Cheez-Its.In today’s episode, we’re talking about what happens when your health, body, and life feel so out of control that you start looking for something, literally anything, that you CAN control. I share my experience with acne, body shame, extreme food restriction, and the slippery slope of trying to "fix" myself through food.I talk about the time I got so restrictive with eating that I lost my hunger cues completely, and the night a random bag of peanuts became a turning point for me (which sounds ridiculous, but also wasn’t).Desperation can make us cling to extreme solutions. And when you're just trying to feel better and grasp control, it's really easy to convince yourself that more restriction is the answer. But spoiler alert: it wasn't.

So many things to feel, so many ways to avoid them.In today’s episode, we’re talking about the different ways we numb ourselves when we don’t want to deal with what we’re feeling. I share how escapism showed up for me in my early twenties through things like binge-watching TV, smoking, drinking, and honestly just doing whatever I could to not be alone with my feelings.I read one of my old journal entries from 2017 where I literally wrote that I couldn’t wait for summer so I could be “high and drunk 24/7” and not have to feel sad. Which… dramatic, yes. But also very real. And weirdly validating to look back on now.We also get into how we can question if our experiences were as bad as we remember, and why chronic escapism is really just our way of trying to numb ourselves from emotional pain.

Apparently having narcolepsy isn’t just exhausting (duh) but it can also make people upset with you (cool).In today’s episode, we’re talking about how your health issues don’t just impact you, they start to creep into your relationships too. I share what it was like dealing with narcolepsy and how something completely out of my control could frustrate the people around me.I get into how confusing and conflicting that felt, trying to explain something people don’t fully understand, while also already feeling insecure about it yourself. And how that ripple effect can show up in friendships, dating, and just feeling misunderstood in general.Sometimes it’s frustrating, sometimes it’s actually kind of funny, but either way it’s a lot to process. And if you’ve ever felt misunderstood because of your health, I get you gal.

Episode 5! Managing health issues when you’re young is hard enough, but doing it alone is like a double whammy. In today’s episode, we’re talking about what it’s like to deal with health stuff while growing up in an unhappy home environment. I share my experience being a teenager with things like acne and depression, while also not having much of a support system. I talk about how this impacted my nervous system and overall health, and how I found small outlets like journaling, soccer, and theater to cope when I didn’t have someone to talk to.At the end of the day, healing isn’t just physical. It requires safety, support, and connection. And if this is something you relate to, I hope this episode makes you feel a little less alone in it.

Episode 4! Because the second you choose to do things a little differently, people tend to have opinions.In today’s episode, we’re talking about being brave enough to question the norms, especially when it comes to your health. I share my experience of being told things like “this is genetic” or “this is just how it is,” and how easy it is to accept that as fact, even when something in you knows it doesn’t feel right.I talk about the moment I decided I couldn’t keep living the way I was and started looking for different answers, along with the pushback, confusion, and comments that can come when you choose a path that looks different from everyone around you.Just because something’s common doesn’t mean it’s normal. If you’re someone who’s choosing to listen to your body, question what you’ve been told, and do things your own way, that’s not wrong. It’s brave.

This episode’s dedicated to someone special to me who passed very recently.An excerpt from one of my journal entries written in 2012:“Melyssa is always going to be one of the most important people in my life. I’ve known her since day 1 and she is the sister I never had… we're so different from each other, like complete opposites. And in a parallel universe, where our parents wouldn’t of known each other, I don’t think me and her would have been friends. But I thank God every day that I have her. And I know i’ll always have her until our last day.”

Episode 2! Ever thought about how two things can be true at once?In today’s episode, we’re talking about the reality of coming off as “normal” in your daily life while still dealing with heavy things behind the scenes.I talk about how constantly staying busy or surrounding yourself with people can become a way to avoid being alone, and the moment I hit a breaking point and finally shared what I was going through because I couldn’t hold it in anymore.You never really know what someone’s carrying beneath the surface. And when you allow yourself to be open and vulnerable about what you’re going through, you create space for other people to do the same and remind them it’s okay if they don’t have it all together either.

Episode 1! And we’re starting off strong. Because tell me why my health issues got so bad they made me hate my own middle name?In this episode, I’m sharing the unexpected domino effect of dealing with acne, depression, narcolepsy, and painful periods, and how it left me feeling so disconnected from myself that even the name “Joy” felt triggering.When your body feels off, it’s never just physical. It trickles into your identity, your emotions, and how you experience your life. And that's the part that's hard to talk about.

A short teaser of what this podcast's all about!This is space where we dive into the human experience of going through health challenges and how it impacts our lives and mental health.I'm talking about the nitty gritty-ness of it all, from the perspective of my unique health journey in hopes it helps you feel seen and a little more understood.