PODCAST · society
The Selfish Woman
by Valerie Jones
Selfish is the key that unlocks the dungeon. This is feminism for the woman who's been in the trenches of life for decades. The kind that comes from surviving marriages, rebuilds, and decades of following rules that were never heard. The confession booth for women who are done being good. Ranked #23 in Feedspot's Top 80 Badass Female Podcasts of 2026
Episodes
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Stop Being A Good Woman! How Doing Everything 'Right' Can Ruin Your Life
What if being a 'good woman' is the very thing keeping you stuck? Be nice. Be reasonable. Keep everyone happy. Don't disappoint people. Don't make a scene. And whatever you do, don't be selfish. I followed those rules for YEARS. I stayed married for 24 years, raised 3 kids, tried harder, kept the...
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Sparkle & Grit: Breaking Free From Burnout & Living in Technicolor with Wendy Meadows
What if burnout isn't evidence that you're doing life wrong? For high-achieving women, burnout can come with an extra layer of shame. We think we should be able to handle it. Mange it better. Be more disciplined. Get it together. In this episode, I'm joined by Wendy Meadows, author of Sparkle &...
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Ditch Imposter Syndrome And Start Owning Your Spotlight with Christine Blosdale
You feel the pull. The idea keeps returning. Some part of you knows you're meant for something bigger. Then...the other voice arrives. Who do you think you are? What if you're not ready? What if everyone realizes you have no idea what you're doing? In this episode, I'm joined by award-winning…
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The Friends You've Outgrown (Nobody Warns You About This)
You can love someone and still outgrow the version of yourself that exists around them. And nobody warns you about this part of changing your life. We talk about the habits you'll have to change, the risks you'll have to take, the courage it takes to walk away from something familiar. We don't…
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The Selfish Sex Revolution with Susan Bratton
What if the same conditioning that teaches women to abandon themselves in life is also showing up in the bedroom? In this fascinating and often hilarious conversation, Valerie sits down with intimacy expert Susan Bratton to explore what happens when women reclaim their desire, their pleasure, and...
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How To End A Marriage Without Going To War: With Kate Daly of amicable
Nobody teaches women how to leave. You get handed a lawyer's number, a horror story from a friend, and the quiet impication that if your marriage ended...somethig must have gone wrong. But what if divorce didn't have to become a bloodbath to be real? In this episode, Valerie sits down with Kate...
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'Reinvention' is Bullshit: Episode 134
The Confession Booth is open! I'm calling BS on the 'reinvention trend'....one that I was fully participating in for the last few years. Nobody reinvents themselves on purpose. Not the way the industry sells it. Real change doesn't start with a plan, it starts with one thought that won't let you...
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Stress Is Not The Problem...This Is: With Dr. Rachel Goldman
We've all been there: a plan falls apart, a deadline shifts, or a minor inconvenience feels like the end of the world. Or, we spend way too much of our time and energy worrying about 'what if.' We usually blame the situation for how we feel, but today's guest says the 'problem' isn't what's...
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The Wrong Life: Ep. 130
I left Spain to figure out what was wrong with me. I had the dream life. The cobblestone streets. The European light. The copper bathtub imported from England that cost eleven thousand euros. And I was miserable in ways I didn't have words for yet. So I left. Convinced I was the problem. I was...
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You Didn't End Up Here by Accident: Numerology, Patterns & Your Life Path with Ann Perry
What if your life isn't random? In this episode, I sit down with numerologist Ann Perry to break down what your numbers reveal about you, and how they shape your relationships, your patterns, and the way you move through the world. We also dive into: What if your soul chose this life? What if the...
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Why You Keep Overthinking (And What You're Actually Avoiding)
Why do you keep overthinking decisions when you already know what to do? In this episode I break down why overthinking isn't a clarity problem, it's a self-trust problem - and what you're actually avoiding. What you'll learn: Why you say "I don't know" (and what it really means) The hidden reason...
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From Netflix's 'Sex, Love & goop' to Erotic Wholeness: Darshana Avila on Asking For What You Want
Darshana Avila left her corporate career and her marriage, and stepped into a life of erotic wholeness. Now she's a Certified Somatic Experiencing Practitioner & Sexological Bodyworker featured on Netflix's Sex, Love & goop with Gwyneth Paltrow - and she's here to talk about what most of us are…
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From Selfish to Sovereign
In this episode I reveal the next level of your journey - from midlife reinvention to full-blown feminine sovereignty. If you're a woman ready to rise into your power, lead with vision, and claim a life that reflects your true worth, this is for you. I unpack the Queen Code (my brand new...
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The Cost of Quiet with Colette Jane Fehr
You've been swallowing your truth, avoiding conflict, and hoping things will change if you're just patient enough. But your silence isn't safety....it's a slow death. This week, I'm talking with Colette Jane Fehr, author of The Cost of Quiet: How to Have the Hard Conversations That Create Secure,...
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Selfish is the Strategy: A New Era Begins
Welcome to Season Five - and to 2026! In this powerful kickoff episode, Valerie pulls back the curtain on what it really means to be selfish in a world that has taught women to disappear. This isn't just a refresher course. It's a full-on reintroduction to the philosophy, fire, and unapologetic...
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Why Your 'Word for the Year' Fails: And How to Choose One That Changes Everything
Most people choose a word for the year based on what they want to achieve, acquire, or accomplish. But that's not how transformation works. In this episode, I'm sharing why your word of the year should be about who you're becoming, not what you want to get. It's a practice in identity, not goals.…
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The Year of the Snake: What You Need to Shed Before 2026
2025 is the Year of the Snake. 2026? The Year of the Fire Horse. If you're familiar about Chinese zodiac symbolism, you know what that means: the Snake sheds what no longer fits. The Fire Horse charges forward with unstoppable momentum. But here's the thing: you can't ride the Fire Horse into…
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The 'Holy Sh*t' Moment: When You Start Toppling Your Sacred Cows
This is a personal episode for me, one that I feel led to share with you, because I know it's going to resonate. There's a moment in every woman's life when she look at what she's been worshipping - success, motherhood, marriage, being 'nice' - and realizes none of it was built for her freedom....
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Hype Women! With Erin Gallagher
In this episode I'm joined by Erin Gallagher, author of Hype Women: Breaking Free From Mean Girls, Patriarchy and Systems Silencing You. Buckle up for a fiery conversation about what it really means to trust yourself after a lifetime of being told you're wrong. We talk about the incredible origin...
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The Mystic & the Machine: Merging AI with Inner Intelligence with Karen Romine
What happens when strategic intelligence meets spiritual intuition? In this electric conversation, I sit down with keynote speaker and author, Karen Romine, to explore the intersection of artificial intelligence and the unseen realms. We talk about how AI is transforming the way we make decisions...
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Selfish Out Loud: Are You Willing to Pay the Price for Your Power?
In this episode, I'm pulling back the curtain on what it really costs to be selfish. Not cute-selfish. Not #selfcare selfish. I'm talking about the kind of selfish that turns your whole life inside out. The kind that sets you free. This is about the power you say you want...and the uncomfortable...
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Rewrite the Mother Code with Dr. Gertrude Lyons
What if the way you've been taught to mother - your children, your dreams, yourself - was never yours to begin with? In this potent conversation, I sit down with Dr. Gertrude Lyons, author of Rewrite the Mother Code: From Sacrifice to Stardust, to unravel the outdated scripts women are handed…
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My Everest, Your Dream: What it Takes to Rise
Every woman has her Everest - the dream that feels impossible until suddenly, it isn't. I had my Everest moment and I'm sharing what it was, how I got there, and how you can do it too. And how there's always another mountain to climb, if you want it. I also talk about the most personal piece of…
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Masks, Mothers, and the Myth of Being Nice with Lesa Koski
You weren't born nice. You were trained. By mothers who were trained. By systems that still benefit from your silence. In this episode, you'll hear a casual girlfriend chat with Lesa Koski where we unearth the origins of our people-pleasing, the masks we wear to feel safe, and the slow-burning...
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10 Sneaky Ways the Good Girl is Still Running Your Life
Think you've outgrown your good girl programming? Think again. These 10 subtle habits might be sabotaging your power - and keeping you small without even realizing it. You might not be saying 'yes' when you mean 'no' anymore - but the good girl still has her sticky little fingers in you. In this...
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Why Taking the High Road Is Keeping You Stuck (and what to do instead)
Too many women think that taking the high road makes them strong, wise, or 'the bigger person.' But what if that road is actually keeping you stuck in self-abandonment, silence, and disappointment? In this episode, I break down why the high road can be a trap, what to do instead, and how...
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The Five Lessons That Saved Me When I Started Over
This is the one I've been waiting to record. In this final episode before The Selfish Year enters the world, I'm sharing the five lessons that truly saved me when I started over - from divorce, from the pain, from the life that looked good but felt empty. These aren't tips. They're confessions. I...
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Ep. 113: No More Layers: Martine Cohen on Stripping Back to Your True Self
In this week's episode, I'm joined by Martine Cohen - author, speaker, and transformative coach - who brings a powerful blend of intellect and intuition to the conversation around healing, identity, and reclaiming your power from the inside out. After a traumatic car accident and concussion…
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Ep. 112: The Sofa of Truth: When Staying Hurts More Than Leaving
Sometimes, the truth doesn't arrive with fireworks. It shows up quietly...in the middle of the night...on your sofa. In this episode, I read an excerpt from my new book, The Selfish Year - the moment I realized I couldn't stay in my marriage one second longer. The pain of staying had finally...
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Ep. 111: You Can't F**k It Up: A Conversation with Jennifer Pastiloff
Let's be real: how many hours have you spent replaying that moment, that choice, that mistake, wondering if you'd just ruined everything? Cringing in guilt and shame, and feeling like a failure? This episode is your permission slip to let yourself off the hook. In this raw and powerful…
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Ep. 110: Why Women Don't Ask (And What It's Costing Us)
We've been told our whole lives not to want too much, need too much, or ask for more. So we don't. We shrink, we wait, and we hope someone notices and gives it to us anyway. And then we wonder why we're so tired, resentful, and invisible. This episode is your wake-up call. I'm pulling back the...
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Are you a control freak? Here's the cost of holding it all together
If you call yourslef a 'control freak' like it's a badge of honour, this one's for you. In this episode, I break down the truth about control: why it's not strength, what it's actually costing you in your body, your mind, and your relationships, and how to finally start letting go without...
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Ep. 108: Burnout isn't exhaustion, it's a wake up call: With Amy Green Smith
Most women think burnout just means being tired. But what if it's acutally a signal - a brutal nudge - to stop abandoning yourself? In this episode, I sit down with Leadership Coach and master hypnotherapist, Amy Green Smith, to talk about the real reasons women burn out and how to wake up before...
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Ep. 107: Selfish Summer Camp Starts Now: I'm Doing This My Way
This week, I had a moment. Okay.... a full-on meltdown. But underneath it, I realized something powerful: I've been trying to launch my book, The Selfish Year, like a good girl. Strategic. Palatable. The 'right' way. So I threw it all in the fire. And from the ashes? Selfish Summer Camp was born....
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Ep. 106: Broke to Six Figures: How I did it Without a Plan
In this episode, I'm sharing my story of how I went from a broke stay-at-home mom to six-figure entrepreneur - with no plan. No degree, no career, no clear path. Just three kids, a toxic marriage and divorce, an empty bank account, and the choice to become the woman I wanted to be. I'm sharing…
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Ep. 105: The Art of the Midlife Relaunch with Hilary DeCesare
What if the biggest challenges in your life weren't meant to break you....but to relaunch you? In today's episode, I sit down with Hilary DeCesare - coach, speaker, and creator of the 3HQ Method - for a deeply honest conversation about what it really takes to rise again in midlife. From her own...
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Episode 104: From Breakdown to Burn: How to Turn 'F**k This' Into Your Wildest Rise Yet
You fed up yet? Good. That means the fire's here. In this solo episode, I take you deep into a recent moment where I finally said enough - and buried the version of me who kept mothering everyone but herself. I walk you through the raw energy behind my new free live event, Fed Up to On Fire, and…
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The ALTARed State: A Raw Invitation to Pleasure, Power & Presence
This isn't a wellness chat about sobriety. This is a full-body transmission from inside The Altared State - my 30-day ritual of choosing presence over performance, power over numbing, and pleasure that doesn't need permission. In this unfiltered episode, I walk you through Days 1 to 6 of the...
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Episode 102: Swallowed Truths & Other Lies We Called Love
Hey Selfies, This one's for the woman who stayed too long. The woman who confused disappearing with devotion. The woman who swallowed her truth and called it maturity. In today's episode, I'm not holding back. I'm calling out the lie we were sold about love, and what it means to reclaim every…
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Episode 101: Make Money in your soft era: feminine flow & wild wealth with Jennifer Whitaker
In this week's episode I'm joined by feminine business coach and founder of the Earth Flow Method, Jennifer Whitaker, for a grounded, soul-shifting conversation about coming home to your feminine energy. We explore why so many women stay stuck in their masculine - pushing, hustle, productivity,...
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Episode 100! This is the Moment When Everything Changes
One hundred episodes ago, I hit record. I didn't know where it would lead - only that something in me had to break free. Today, it's not a celebration. It's a summoning. This episode is the line in the sand. The mirror. The match. The moment everything changes - not just for me, but for you.…
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Episode 99: Exhausted and over it: Stop performing already!
If you feel drained, depleted, and like no matter how much rest you get, you're still exhausted....you're not alone! You're not tired because life is hard. You're tired because you're stuck performing. Performing as the nice girl. Performing as the easygoing woman. Performing to keep the peace…
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Episode 98: Out of Office: Why rest is the new power move
In this bonus episode, I'm coming to you with sand in my suitcase and rebellion in my bones. Let's talk about the guilt we feel when we rest. The fear that if we stop, everything will fall apart. The lie that our worth is tied to our productivity. For years, I couldn't stop. Raising kids.…
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Episode 97: The Patriarchy is not your god: living powerfully starts here
In this fiery sermon of an episode, I'm pulling no punches. We're talking about the invisible leash of patriarchal conditioning and how it keeps powerful women small. I'm not here to make you comfortable. I'm here to remind you who the hell you are. If you've ever felt like you were too much, too...
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Episode 96: Tethered - if you're still thinking about them, you're not crazy.
You said you were done. You blocked them. You deleted the photos. You told yourself, "I've moved on" But if you're still feeling the ache, still replaying the memories, still carrying that weight....you're not crazy. You're still tethered. In this raw and real episode, I'm pulling back the…
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Episode 95: Good girls die bitter: Rewrite your eulogy
What if the reason you feel stuck, numb, or unfulfilled isn't because you're broken, but because the 'good girl' inside you needs to die? In this fiery and vulnerable episode, I'm inviting you to take a brutally honest look at your life and ask yourself: What would your eulogy say, if you died...
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Episode 94: Selfless is a Scam: Why putting everyone first is ruining your life
This episode is for every woman who's ever felt guilty about putting herself first. I'm calling out the 'selfless' lie we've been sold, and the emotional, physical and spiritual cost of people-pleasing your way through life. If you've been told your worth is in your service, your silence, your...
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Episode 93: Career, Confidence & Change with Lata Hamilton
Are you ready to step into the next chapter of your life with confidence, power and purpose? In this episode I sit down with Lata Hamilton, a Change Leadership and Confidence Expert who went from marketing to leading massive transformations in some of Australia's biggest companies - all while...
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Breaking the Fear Loop: A Selfish Woman's Guide to Bold Moves
Fear and self-doubt have been running the show for too long. They keep you stuck second-guessing yourself, and playing small. But what if you could finally break free? In this episode, we're diving deep into the root causes of fear and self-doubt, why they keep showing up, and - most importantly…
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Divorce Like a Boss: Own the Strategy, Rewrite the Story with Karen Covy
Divorce isn't just an ending - it's a transition, and how you navigate it can set the stage for the rest of your life. In this episode, I'm sitting down with Karen Covy, a powerhouse Divorce Coach, lawyer, mediator, author and speaker, who helps high-achieving professionals take control of their...
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ABOUT THIS SHOW
Selfish is the key that unlocks the dungeon. This is feminism for the woman who's been in the trenches of life for decades. The kind that comes from surviving marriages, rebuilds, and decades of following rules that were never heard. The confession booth for women who are done being good. Ranked #23 in Feedspot's Top 80 Badass Female Podcasts of 2026
HOSTED BY
Valerie Jones
CATEGORIES
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Frequently Asked Questions
How many episodes does The Selfish Woman have?
The Selfish Woman currently has 148 episodes available on PodParley. New episodes are automatically indexed when they're published to the podcast feed.
What is The Selfish Woman about?
Selfish is the key that unlocks the dungeon. This is feminism for the woman who's been in the trenches of life for decades. The kind that comes from surviving marriages, rebuilds, and decades of following rules that were never heard. The confession booth for women who are done being good. Ranked...
How often does The Selfish Woman release new episodes?
The Selfish Woman publishes regularly with 148 episodes available. Check the episode list for the typical release schedule.
Where can I listen to The Selfish Woman?
You can listen to The Selfish Woman on PodParley by clicking any episode. We provide an embedded audio player for direct listening, and you can also subscribe via your preferred podcast app using the RSS feed.
Who hosts The Selfish Woman?
The Selfish Woman is created and hosted by Valerie Jones.
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