All Episodes
back from the borderline — 354 episodes
The Braced Body: The Spiritual Cost of Always Being in Control (Part 3)
The Braced Body: Why Rest Feel Unsafe & How to Let Go (Part 2)
The Braced Body: Why You’re Tense Even When Nothing Is Wrong (Part 1)
What Do We Do With a Broken Spiritual Inheritance?
UFOs, AI, and the Religion of the Unconscious (Live at Contact in the Desert 2026)
Mary Magdalene and the End of Spiritual Childhood
The Occult Teacher We Need Right Now: Dion Fortune, Psychic Hygiene, and the Magick of the Mind
The Skill AI Can Never Replace (And Why I’m Teaching Tarot)
The Arrogance of Too Much Empathy
Gay Men Have Always Loved a “Difficult” Woman
The Female Shadow
The Christian Grimoire Evangelicals Forgot About (Part 1)
Why Everyone Sounds Religious About AI [Consciousness Stream for May 2026]
The Body Keeps the Mileage (On Mortality & Wellness Panic)
Why Tarot Feels So Accurate, And How to Actually Read a Card
The Intelligence of Madness, Part Two: How We Come Back
Why “Disclosure” is a Distraction and How to Stay Sane as Reality Crumbles
The Intelligence of Madness, Part One: Who Gets Called Insane?
Why Your Mind Feels Broken in the Age of Babel
Stop Healing Your Inner Child and Shed Your Dead Trauma Skin
The missing piece of your soul and the lost technology of Mary Magdalene
Why your repetitive trauma cycles are fueling a reality that feeds on you
The Internet is Dead and The Goddess is SO Back [April 2026 - Week 1]
Being a Young Woman Feels Like Being HUNTED
Stop Blaming Yourself for the Mother Wound
Why the Elite Rely on Your Spiritual Ignorance
How to Sniff Out and Stop Tolerating Bullshit
The Loneliness at the End of Manifestation Culture (Part 1)
Your Existential Dread is a Completely Rational Response
Unbothered & Feral: Astrology & Tarot for March 7 - 14 (2026)
AI is a Time Machine: The Vertical Plane, UFOs & The Digital Daimon
The Sunday School Psyop: How the Ancient Priests Invented God and Erased His Wife
Epstein, Eugenics, and the False Gods of Silicon Valley Buried in the Dirt at Zorro Ranch
How to Outsource Your Biggest Problems to Your Intuition
The PINK Psyop: Les Wexner, Epstein & The Occult Inversion of the Angel
The Machines Are Praying: Moltbook, Gnosticism, & The Digital Mirror
Why the Death of TikTok is a Spiritual Crisis
Girl on Girl: The Erotic Haunting of Female Friendship
Escaping the Trap of Perpetual Girlhood (He’s Not “Avoidant,” You’re Just Bored)
why everyone is hot and no one is happy: bodies as product, desire as labor (pt 2)
Sex in the Third Person: Why You Leave Your Body to Watch Yourself Perform
why everyone is hot and no one is happy: the men women want (part 1)
The Voice You’re Using Isn’t Yours
The Cool Girl Myth and Trend Culture as Self Abandonment
the cassandra curse: feeling “crazy” when you’re actually right
why you can’t relax: the 5 survival spells running your life
why you’re obsessed with people who can’t love you back
nick fuentes and the cult of irony
when you’re done being the good daughter
how to ACTUALLY stop giving a f**k about what people think of you
how AI is rewiring the human psyche
the female market, part 2: the cost of freedom
the female market, part 1: the price of desire
the occult truth about heartbreak
the holy grail and the lost wisdom of the west
how we all became a little satanic
digital scapegoats and the ritual of outrage
the unhappy woman: against the cult of calm
the age of AI slop and the birth of a new renaissance
the magician who invented the modern world: john dee and the lost birth of science
the IFS takedown: my unfiltered response to the psych industry’s victory lap
the world isn't real (and why that might actually be a good thing)
dark enlightenment: the forbidden philosophy behind the tech elite
when stillness feels dangerous (hypervigilance as a religion)
enchantment in the age of disenchantment w/ dr. teddy hamstra
trauma fossils: when survival becomes a ghost in the soul
the hidden AI system monitoring your emotional state
the alchemy of sleep and how your roots decide what you dream
aleister crowley: the man, the myth, the shadow
ufo disclosure bombshell [part 2]: why masculine thinking is killing disclosure
why i hope we're living in a simulation
the ufo disclosure bombshell [part 1]: human trafficking in black programs exposed
occult statecraft: how demons, magicians, and intelligence agencies shaped the modern world
everything we now call "drugs" used to be how humans touched god
anomalies, intuition, and the edge of what we know with jeffrey mishlove, PhD
the forgotten codes of love i'll teach my daughter [part 2]
the forgotten codes of love i'll teach my daughter [part 1]
your pain is real but your suffering is a story
why medieval witches and modern alien experiencers are describing the same thing
when magick went underground
religious trauma and the silent toll on female emotional development (a roundtable with stephanie ann and alyssa grenfell)
the 1000-year-old tibetan secret that makes western psychology look like child's play
selective spiritual technophobia: why mystics and scientists are both getting AI wrong
why shadow work is making you worse
meme magic, hot mess eras, and digital disappearance with aiden arata
the death of the people-pleaser: how self-abandonment becomes a survival strategy
TDC_21: the secret sauce to awakening? paradox.
cutting the cord, keeping the thread: how to stop repeating your parents’ coping mechanisms in adult life
why age gap relationships aren’t normal: grooming, power, and emotional maturity
the emotional cost of always being available (why you’re drowning in unread messages)
you can’t domesticate venus: sex, power, and the archetypes running your life with dr. laurence hillman
your whole childhood wasn’t bad: the danger of “all-trauma” narratives
disordered desire: performing connection, numbing pleasure, forgetting yourself
what they're hiding about your mind
why psychiatry failed her: laura delano on misdiagnosis, medication, and coming back to life
the real reason you’re afraid of the devil (you’re possessed, and it looks nothing like the movies)
the psychology of love island USA S7: why it broke the internet (and what it says about us)
you’re NOT crazy, you’re remembering the real world.
why personality ISN'T a prison (unless you let it be)
what you're calling a breakdown might be a dark baptism
let them cook: shadow work, shame, and the stew of self
dancing with the devil part 2: the return (how to grow the f*ck up and quit calling red flags soulmates)
motherhood as death ritual (a rite of passage for women with or without children)
dancing with the devil part 1: the descent (why you keep ignoring your gut instinct and mistaking danger for ‘chemistry’)
psychic hygiene in the age of AI
unlearning toxic shame through sacred speech (a guided journey)
chatGPT told him he was god (what no one’s saying about AI and spiritual delusion)
are you emotionally feral?
why you reject the love you crave (emotional maturity, trauma, and learning to receive)
healing the christian wound: empire, myth, and the pattern beneath it all
the death of celebrity culture is here (and why it's good for your mental health)
emotional alchemy: a guide for when everything falls apart
how to surrender to the mystery and let go your need for certainty
what does AI believe? (the hidden soul inside the machine)
nobody's watching. nobody cares. you're free now.
communication mastery series part 3: stop people pleasing, start owning your space
healing in a world that won't heal
communication mastery series part 2: the stoic art of emotional control
i miss who i was before the internet knew me
communication mastery series part 1: command your voice, command your life
you're sleepwalking: it's time to wake up to what's ACTUALLY real
why you crave chaos in love
the demons you bury are the lessons you need to learn
how the energy you carry is secretly controlling your life
you say you've changed — so why does your life look the same?
the truth about healing: you’ll never be who you were
what you lose when you share too much
why limerence FEELS like love, but isn't
will AI set you free or control your mind? (psychiatry, mental health, and the machine age)
what stories are you telling yourself about your suffering?
dysfunctional family roles – part 5: hidden agendas (the peacemaker/mediator and narcissistic traits) [preview]
mind unveiled part 6: the individuation process as spiritual ascent (integrating outer psychology, personality types, and the mystical qabalah)
dysfunctional family roles – part 4: avoidance strategies (the mascot/clown and the lost child/rebel) [preview]
mind unveiled part 5: the shadow (working with your dark side)
dysfunctional family roles – part 3: responsibilities and escape (the parentified child and the addict) [preview]
mind unveiled part 4: the psyche as a living reality (exploring consciousness and the collective unconscious)
dysfunctional family roles – part 2: the extremes of family focus (the golden child and the scapegoat) [preview]
mind unveiled part 3: unmasking the soul image (the false self, archetypes, the anima and animus)
dysfunctional family roles – part 1: decoding the dynamics of dysfunction [preview]
mind unveiled part 2: carl jung and the advent of spiritual psychology
anatomy of evil: britney spears (from pop princess to public prisoner – a story of exploitation and control) [preview]
mind unveiled part 1: the birth of psychotherapy and the theories of sigmund freud
from hashtag to holy: reclaiming the mystical art of manifestation from the clutches of social media [preview]
what if the chains of your past are looser than you think? (breaking free from trauma bonding and repetition compulsion)
introducing my new podcast, “back from the borderline baby.”
self-mastery part 2: embracing the journey through life and soul cycles
the systemic grooming of a generation (part 1): the unseen puppeteers of the media and pharmaceutical conspiracy [preview]
self-mastery part 1: becoming a free agent and understanding the cycles of life
sleeping with 100 men in a day: a psychological deep dive into sex, self-harm, and lily phillips
new age or new cage? (walking the tightrope of digital spirituality) [preview]
the millennials who were groomed by the internet: my story, jay-z and diddy
anatomy of evil: h.h. holmes (how victorian vice shaped the mask of a gentleman killer) [preview]
unplugging from the matrix: 10 arguments for deleting your social media right now
“when trauma becomes your identity, that’s a dangerous thing” [preview]
the inner temple: an ASMR ceremony of self-initiation
do you act like you were never held as a baby? (how unmet needs in infancy might be sabotaging your ability to find love)
could your entire life be a virtual simulation? (unveiling what lies beyond the illusions we accept as reality) [preview]
are you turning self-care into a form of self-punishment? (moving beyond hyper-control, emotional numbing and the body-mind disconnection)
this episode isn’t about UFOs – it’s about YOU [part 2]
has adulthood robbed you of youth’s magic? (reclaiming healing in unscheduled moments) [premium preview]
is social media convincing us that everyone cheats? (unraveling the myth of universal infidelity)
this episode isn’t about UFOs – it’s about YOU [part 1]
no f*cks given: inside the rise of emotional detachment (and what it's doing to us)
how to recognize (and break) the cycle of relationship OCD
are you in your drama era? (how to cleanse your life of conflict once and for all) [preview]
beyond black and white: navigating moral purity in the age of cancel culture
anatomy of evil: the fear of female rage [preview]
for anyone who lies awake at night wondering wtf the point is (transforming existential terror into acceptance of life’s impermanence)
in a world where we are glorifying and glamorizing our psychological suffering, are we losing the ability to overcome it? [preview]
healing childhood trauma with fairy tales: transforming emotional wounds with the handless maiden
is it your attachment style, or is it just the wrong relationship? [preview]
when self-help stops helping: recognizing when therapy and introspection might be doing more harm than good
is there a ‘normal’ amount of sex in a relationship? [preview]
unlock higher states of consciousness by understanding the different levels of thinking (exploring ken wilber’s AQAL integral theory)
anatomy of evil: the salem witch trials (puritan paranoia, mass hysteria, and social scapegoating) [preview]
are we blind to our own cultural sickness? (lessons from the mouse utopia experiment and behavioral sink)
the dark side of cosmetic surgery: real stories of regret [preview]
too much to handle: understanding the power of your emotional intensity, sensory sensitivity, and overexcitabilities
the 48 laws of power: episode 3 (laws for self-protection) [preview]
were you under-mothered? exploring the generational impact of “mother hunger”
the 48 laws of power: episode 2 (laws for taking your power BACK) [preview]
the new gods: how commercialized spirituality and therapy culture have become dogmatic modern religions
the 48 laws of power: episode 1 (laws to recognize signs of manipulation) [preview]
exposing the troubled teen industry: surviving ‘the harvard of therapeutic boarding schools’ (ft. nick taber)
anatomy of evil – aileen wuornos (challenging the “monster myth:” trauma, gender bias, systemic failures and media exploitation) [preview]
rose cartwright’s path from the poster girl for OCD to psychedelic awakening and holistic healing
the interstitium uncovered: trauma, healing, and your body’s hidden fluid spaces [preview]
girlbosses and tradwives: embracing fluidity in parenthood and partnership
how to stop turning every minor concern into a major meltdown [preview]
mean girls: healing from and overcoming the hidden harms of female bullying
anatomy of evil: charles manson (charisma, manipulation, and control) [preview]
online stigma and BPD: reacting to the internet's worst takes on pete davidson and jenna ortega
the antidepressant controversy: inside the heated debate over SSRI withdrawal symptoms
how to work with your dreams: uncovering your soul’s messages and transforming trauma with louise rosager
takedown: laila mickelwait’s battle to expose the 'executive megapimps' behind pornhub's sex crimes
mending mind and spirit: the path of sacred psychiatry with dr. judy tsafrir
old tricks, new faces: modern female pickup artists and their (outdated) 90s dating playbook [preview]
how psychiatry became the fast food of mental health treatments: exposing systemic failures and hidden agendas with dr. roger mcfillin
the evolution of melancholia: from ancient narratives to modern depression [preview]
healing your dysregulated nervous system: from flailing through life to micro-dosing silence with elisabeth kristof
the beauty paradox: unpacking our toxic obsession with youth and appearance [preview]
from labels to liberation: exploring the power threat meaning framework with dr. lucy johnstone
lessons from the borderline (how BPD is a disorder of relationship, NOT of personality) [preview]
the curse position: exploring trauma and the supernatural in psychotherapy with alex monk
when your spirit feels broken: how to recognize and survive a dark night of the soul [preview]
how psychiatry lost its way: bad science, bad medicine and the mistreatment of the mentally ill with robert whitaker
are you guarding your heart too much? (how to break down your emotional walls) [preview]
taylor swift’s teenage dream: a depth psychological tour through ‘the tortured poets department’ and the puella aeterna archetype
“when will it be my turn to find love?” (the dumpster fire of modern dating) [preview]
childhood emotional neglect part 11: healing (transforming suffering into strength and crafting a new narrative)
reclaiming your spiritual path after religious trauma and commercialized spirituality [preview]
childhood emotional neglect part 10: healing (reclaiming your power and understanding threat responses)
exposing miss USA’s dark secrets: title holder resignations, misogyny, corruption, and 'everywhere like such as’
BPD as hysteria in sheep’s clothing: the persistent myth of female instability from ancient greece to modern psychiatry [preview]
childhood emotional neglect part 9: signs and symptoms – internalized anger, lack of self-discipline, and alexithymia
the healing power of labyrinths and EMDR [preview]
drake vs. kendrick: the battle over allegations of grooming and underage girls in the digital age
“why did you even have kids?” (how different generations have transmitted emotional neglect) [preview]
childhood emotional neglect part 8: signs and symptoms – skewed self-perception, lack of self-compassion, and toxic shame
how a dysfunctional family system functions like a cult [preview]
childhood emotional neglect part 7: signs and symptoms – chronic feelings of emptiness and counter-dependence
childhood emotional neglect part 6: linking past pain and present health while challenging the myths of modern recovery methods
reparenting visualization series introduction [free premium offering]
childhood emotional neglect part 5: sociopathic, childlike, and well-meaning-but-neglected-themselves parents
childhood emotional neglect part 4: workaholic, perfection-obsessed, and special-care parents
is avoiding discomfort by self-censorship halting your healing process? [preview]
childhood emotional neglect part 3: divorced, grieving, addicted, and depressed parenting
when you feel like an alien in your own family: defying dysfunction through healing [preview]
childhood emotional neglect part 2: narcissistic, authoritarian, and permissive parenting
beyond the mother wound: healing neglect and trauma with the black madonna [preview]
childhood emotional neglect part 1: the silent legacy of invisible wounds
breaking down to break through: psychiatry, covert abuse, and awakening [preview]
the "sharenting" trap: protecting children's digital footprint in the age of gen alpha influencers
the SSRI lie: the fraudulent study that laid the groundwork for psychiatry's greatest deception [preview]
surrender and heal: a guided trauma recovery ritual through visualization
VN30: the impact of emotionally absent mothering [preview]
spiritual emergency pt 3: uncovering pathways for self-healing and professional help
finding secret delight in the downfall of others: exploring schadenfreude [preview]
spiritual emergency pt 2: a guide to recognizing the different types of transcendent crises
spiritual emergency pt 1: mental breakdown or spiritual awakening?
down-to-earth awakening beyond the woo-woo and delulu (ft. christian bradley west)
the hidden toll: carrying the mental load in relationships [preview]
sacrificing our mental health at the altar of social media (ft. thanasi dilos)
show me your scars and i’ll show you how deep you are (ft. laurence hillman)
the radical therapist: silent screams from the asylum [preview]
consciousness-expansion and deeper healing through the power of myth
the radical therapist: unmasking the systemic stagnation of psychiatric training [preview]
trauma worlds: embodied healing beyond shame’s shadow [part 3]
the radical therapist: challenging psychiatry - care or control? [preview]
trauma worlds: navigating the hidden realms of fear and disconnection [part 2]
the radical therapist: therapy means change, not adjustment [preview]
trauma worlds: when negative experiences meet unique human beings [part 1]
the alchemy of self-knowledge: jungian insights on synchronicity
are mental disorders brain diseases ‘in waiting’? [preview]
from coercion to consent: WHO and UN say psychiatry must change entirely
the healing power of somatic breathwork [preview]
the bledsoe family's cosmic rebirth: unveiling non-human intelligence
from human doing to human being [preview]
healing from religious trauma using the philosophy of the mystics
venting or vicious: escaping the grip of toxic gossip [preview]
embracing your crazy while falling apart and coming back together
unlocking emotional freedom: a guide to EFT tapping [preview]
from mainstream to energy medicine with dr. larry burk
"my phobia of death and dying is making it impossible for me to truly LIVE” [preview]
processing complicated feelings around death and grief through working with the unseen worlds
why you keep falling in limerence with unavailable people who break your heart [preview]
unlock the source code to your imagination matrix with stephen aizenstat, Ph.D
our paradigm-shifting UAP experience with the bledsoe family [free preview]
creating a map through the hell of depression toward a radical elsewhere
accessing your innermost wisdom through dreamwork
tapping into your unconscious repressed anger as a highly sensitive person
pov: your big sister is erykah badu and she's giving you some tough love
family scapegoating abuse part 3: grief, acceptance, and healing
family scapegoating abuse part 2: signs, effects, and misdiagnosis
family scapegoating abuse part 1: the black sheep
are you going to fit in or find your path? (ft. james hollis)
living in the shadow of your family tree (interview with family constellations therapist marine sélénée)
it makes perfect sense why we're all sick and fucking tired
the crisis of contemporary psychiatry with dr. bruce levine
the repressed anger to manipulation pipeline (free preview)
shame series part 8: religious trauma, rigid sex roles and cultural suppression of emotion
the dystopian "NPC" TikTok trend is melting our brains
shame series part 7: unmet childhood needs, perfectionism, and public shaming
shame series part 6: toxic shame in the aftermath of sexual and physical abuse
shame series part 5: unraveling the impact of abandonment
shame series part 4: how toxic shame fuels dysfunctional family systems
shame series part 3: toxic shame and 'disordered' or 'dysfunctional' personality traits
shame series part 2: when toxic shame becomes who you are
shame series part 1: healthy shame makes you human
healing parental wounds through spiritual practice
daddy issues: recognizing and healing the father wound
the mother wound: sacred scars as a portal to healing
this high school dropout is transforming the failing public school system by following her bliss
finding a sense of self as a trauma-dumping emotional vampire
ending your self-destructive patterns of relationship sabotage once and for all
recovering human connection through rupture and repair
fear of abandonment and the mother wound in fairy tales
find your life's purpose with the japanese philosophy of ikigai
deepfakes, revenge porn, and the impact on body autonomy
are you an approval addict?
completely transform the way you view your mental health symptoms with this reframe
emotional reactivity and toxic friendships
developing a growth mindset to overcome splitting and perfectionism
healing control and codependency issues to get your needs met in a healthier way
your personality masks are blocking access to your TRUE self
sober curious: a fresh and dialectical approach to alcohol use
"am i crazy, or are they gaslighting me?"
blindsided by betrayal: learning to love again after being cheated on
breaking the cycle of pain: moving on and healing from a traumatic breakup
overcoming executive dysfunction: "why can't i just do the thing?!"
mental illness is not in your head: evolving beyond the medical model in recovery
how scott broke the cycle of generational family trauma while parenting with emotion dysregulation
understanding the different models of mental health can help you find a helpful therapist (and avoid harmful ones)
what to do when you finally wake up to the pain you've caused the people you love
when your emotional dysregulation makes it hard to hold down a job
transforming and healing your intimacy issues (ft. zaz)
transcending the self: the importance of gaining a higher perspective in your recovery journey
all the rage: healthy ways to to respond to (and work with) anger
dissociation, depersonalization and derealization: understanding these common responses to trauma
identity disturbance: why your search for a "sense of self" might be keeping you stuck
using the narrative therapy framework to get to the root cause of your suffering
from disorder to design: flipping the script on "mental health symptoms" with philosopher justin garson
are your caveman desires standing in the way of true happiness?
underrated recovery hacks to change the beliefs that are holding you back
manipulative love: narcissistic mothers, enmeshed parentified children, and emotional incest (reviewing jeanette mccurdy's book "i'm glad my mom died")
can chronic porn use destroy your sex life? (billie eilish thinks so)
are you at rock bottom and questioning the point of life? (this one's for you)
your symptoms of "mental illness" might be hidden spiritual gifts (ft. dr. lisa miller)
pete davidson: understanding patterns of unstable relationships and self-harm
the root cause of your deep fear of abandonment
how to cope when you feel like you have no control over your explosive emotions
using radically open dialectical behavior therapy (RO DBT) to overcome issues with overcontrol
how trauma throws you off balance (understanding your window of tolerance) [+ a discussion on asexuality]
signs you lack personal boundaries (feeling used and drained by other people)
are you mentally ill or spiritually starved? (the problem with "disorder" and "dysfunction" labels)
no strings attached: the impact casual sex can have on our mental health
understanding hyper-sexuality: how a history of trauma leads to sex as self-harm
reclaiming your sexual agency after chronic objectification with dr. alexandra solomon
witches and borderline bitches: exploring the rampant sexism in psychiatry
overcoming existential dread, death anxiety, and religious trauma
radical self-compassion: learning to love yourself (and finding your "touch tree")
finding natural relief from PMS and PMDD with menstrual cycle awareness
channeling your emotional intensity into artistic expression
when your body isn't your own: what abusive relationships and grooming taught me about love
stuff i've learned the hard way so you don't have to (my most powerful recovery lessons)
why you keep repeating the same dysfunctional relationship patterns (ft. the holistic psychologist)
using the power of self-inquiry and your window of tolerance in trauma recovery
overcoming extreme emotion dysregulation and suicidal ideation (ft. CJ THE X)
how learning to live within your integrity may be the key to resolving your identity issues
learning to accurately label your emotions with psychoanalyst dr. jayce long
understanding your unconscious mind with psychoanalyst dr. jayce long
tarot therapy for trauma recovery and shadow work with dr. elliot adam
are you emotionally overcontrolled or undercontrolled? (ft. dr. anita federici)
→ your transformation starts here ←