Lucky In Love with Kari Hoskins

Should you stay married, separate, or get divorced? Most people think the divorce decision has only two options: stay or leave. But the truth is, the decision is usually much more nuanced than that.In this episode of The Divorce Decision Podcast, Kari Hoskins walks through five options people often have when they are questioning their marriage. Instead of rushing toward a black-and-white answer, this episode helps you think more clearly about which version of staying or leaving you may be choosing.You’ll hear about the difference between staying and accepting the marriage as it is, staying while taking your happiness back into your own hands, staying to repair or rebuild the relationship, separating without divorcing yet, and choosing divorce when the marriage is no longer healthy, repairable, or wanted.Kari also explains the difference between repairing a marriage and rebuilding one, why a therapeutic separation can be more helpful than a vague “I need space” separation, and why divorce is not always a failure, but it is a serious decision that deserves clarity, honesty, and care.If you are silently wondering, “Should I stay or leave my marriage?” this episode will help you slow down, understand your real options, and think about your next step with more intention and less panic.Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

Have you been secretly unhappy in your marriage but unsure how to tell your spouse?In this episode of The Divorce Decision Podcast, Kari Hoskins talks to the spouse who has been carrying private pain, resentment, loneliness, or discontent for months—or even years—without knowing when or how to finally say it out loud.Before you say divorce, there may be an honest conversation that needs to happen first.Kari explains why private unhappiness becomes so emotionally exhausting, how unresolved issues create “open loops” in a marriage.You’ll learn how to recognize when it may be time to share your unhappiness, how to begin the conversation in a more productive way, and what questions to reflect on before you talk with your husband or wife.If you feel lonely in your marriage, tired of pretending everything is fine, or afraid that one conversation could change everything, this episode will help you find language for what you’ve been carrying—and take the first step toward clarity.Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

Do relatively small things that your spouse does or says create big feelings inside of you? Is it normal for you to feel upset, angry, annoyed  or some other negative emotion towards your spouse regularly?If you answered "yes" to either of these questions, you might have fallen victim to this subconscious thought pattern making your daily life feel worse.  In this episode of The Divorce Decision Podcast, Kari Hoskins unpacks one of the most powerful mental traps affecting unhappy marriages and divorce decisions: confirmation bias.When you’re hurt, resentful, lonely, or stuck in limbo, it becomes easy to interpret everything your spouse says and does through an already painful story: They don’t care. Nothing will ever change. I’m the only one trying. We’re too far gone. But that lens can distort what’s actually happening in your marriage and quietly shape how you feel, how you react, and whether you lean toward rebuilding or divorce. Kari breaks down how confirmation bias works in struggling relationships, how it can make living under the same roof feel even more miserable, and how it can push people toward divorce too fast — or keep them hanging on to hope too long. Through real-life coaching examples, she shows how this subconscious pattern can fuel conflict, cloud clarity, and interfere with honest decision-making. If you’re questioning your marriage, feeling stuck in uncertainty, or trying to decide whether to stay or leave, this episode will help you take a more honest look at the story you’re telling yourself — and the evidence you may be ignoring. In this episode: What confirmation bias is and how it shows up in marriage  Why small things start to feel huge in unhappy relationships  How negative and positive bias can both cloud the truth  Why confirmation bias can distort a divorce decision in either direction  Two powerful questions to help you think more clearly about your marriageInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

In this episode of The Divorce Decision Podcast, I talk about a common struggle people face when they’re trying to decide whether to stay in a marriage or leave: the pressure to justify their decision to other people.I explain why that pressure can be so damaging to your clarity, especially when family or friends want answers, have opinions, or expect your choice to make sense to them. I also share two situations where this tends to hit hardest: when you’ve kept your marriage problems private, and when something major like infidelity or addiction is involved and everyone suddenly has strong opinions about what you should do. I break down how over-explaining can create self-doubt, cause you to exaggerate or minimize what is really happening in the relationship, and keep you from making an honest, grounded decision. I also talk about why it matters to stay clear-eyed about your own patterns and your role in the marriage, whether you stay or leave. Finally, I share practical, neutral ways to respond when people ask why you’re staying or why you’re leaving, so you can answer with honesty without feeling like you have to defend your life. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

In this episode, I tackle one of the most painful and often invisible relationship struggles: feeling lonely in your marriage. And I’m not just talking about being physically alone. I’m talking about feeling emotionally disconnected, unseen, unheard, and like you’re living life next to your partner instead of with them.I break down how loneliness in a marriage happens over time, often through small patterns that slowly create distance: unresolved conflict, lack of meaningful communication, mismatched emotional needs, stress that gets internalized, and spending time together without truly connecting. I also share personal insight from my own past marriage and talk about why this kind of disconnection is far more common than many couples realize.In this episode, we look at why loneliness in a relationship should never be brushed off as “not that serious,” and how emotional distance can eventually lead to resentment, loss of intimacy, separate lives, and sometimes separation or divorce. I also walk through four key areas of intimacy that help us feel connected again: emotional intimacy, intellectual intimacy, shared experiences, and physical affection.Whether you’re the partner feeling alone or you’re the one hearing that your spouse feels disconnected, this episode will help you better understand what’s missing, why it matters, and one small place to start. Because loneliness in a marriage does not fix itself, and ignoring it is where the real trouble begins.Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

Is your relationship affecting you more than you realize? In this episode of Lucky in Love, I break down 3 sneaky signs your relationship is taking a toll on you—mentally, emotionally, and even physically.If you feel tense when your spouse walks into the room, notice that your patience for everyone else is getting shorter, or find yourself daydreaming more about being alone than reconnecting, this episode is for you. These subtle signs of relationship stress, marriage burnout, and emotional disconnection often get brushed off, but they can be powerful clues that your unhappy relationship is impacting your health and well-being.I share why chronic stress in a marriage can show up in your body, how emotional strain affects your daily life, and why getting support—whether from a trusted friend, therapist, or relationship coach—can help you feel clearer, calmer, and grounded.If you’re questioning your relationship, feeling stuck in an unhappy marriage, or wondering whether your relationship is hurting your health, this conversation will give you insight and next steps.In this episode, we cover:signs your relationship is taking a toll on youunhappy marriage symptomschronic stress and relationship healthsigns your marriage is affecting your healthdifferent types of help for relationship problemsFor coaching support, visit kahoskins.com Follow Kari on social: @KariHoskinsCoachingYou can click on the links belowInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

In this episode, I'm breaking down a deceptively simple tool that can change the emotional temperature of your marriage fast: the 3% Rule. If your partner is “97% responsible” for what’s wrong, where is your 3%—the part you can own, influence, and change? This isn’t about taking the blame or excusing bad behavior. It’s about taking responsibility in a relationship in a way that reduces resentment, lowers defensiveness, and gives you real agency instead of staying stuck in the blame game.I share how I learned this concept (inspired by Katherine Woodward Thomas and the work of Unconscious Uncoupling) after my first marriage ended—and how it helped me let go of lingering anger, regret, and bitterness so she could show up better as a co-parent and in other relationships.What you’ll learn:What the 3% Rule is (and why it’s not self-blame—it’s leverage)How the 3% Rule creates emotional peace by reducing resentment, blame, defensiveness, and regretThe biggest clue you’re stuck in the blame game (“they, they, they…” thinking) and what to do insteadHow to identify your recurring negative thoughts, triggers, and patterns to find your 3%What your 3% can look like in common dynamics:Feeling controlled → speaking up, setting and holding boundariesDealing with lies/omissions → creating emotional safety so honesty is possibleFeeling consistently let down → turning unspoken expectations into clear agreementsWhy vague requests (“I need more help”) don’t work—and how to make specific, actionable asksHow to stop ignoring the data when your partner has a track record (late, avoidant, forgetful) and respond with boundaries and/or supportThe “missing step” that keeps couples stuck: not closing the loop with a clear “next time” planA real-life example of how the 3% Rule can shift intimacy issues, desire, and disconnection in a marriageInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

In this episode, Lucky in Love, I’m breaking down how sex quietly turns into a chore in long-term relationships—and how to start fixing it fast. If you’re in a dead bedroom, a sexless marriage (or nearly sexless relationship), or struggling with mismatched sex drives (a desire discrepancy), this episode will help you understand why your sexual desire may be fading—and what to do to fix a dead bedroom by changing a few everyday habits that kill desire.When sex turns into a checkbox, your brain starts treating it like work—something you power through, avoid, or resent—making it harder to want sex and harder to get turned on.I help you understand why these everyday habits: Sex only at bedtime, initiating sex out of nowhere, quickies only are quietly killing your desire and I offer practical fixes that will help you rekindle desire. If you want to rebuild intimacy, rekindle attraction, and make sex feel connected again, these small habit shifts can restart the desire loop.Kari Hoskins is a Communication & Conflict Specialist who helps couples stuck in the pain of uncertainty over the future of their relationship. She holds a Master’s degree in Communication & Interpersonal Relationships, spent 20+ years as a college professor, and is a certified relationship coach with specialized training in emotional intimacy, trauma, infidelity, and addiction.Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

In this episode of Lucky in Love, we’re talking about the sneaky relationship habit that quietly pulls couples apart: passive-aggressive behavior. Not the “big blow-up” fights—more like the slow drip of little moments that leave your partner feeling tense, guarded, and emotionally unsafe over time. And the worst part? A lot of us don’t even realize we’re doing it… or how much it changes the way our partner feels about us.I break down why passive aggression is so damaging: it keeps you from dealing with the real issue directly, and it creates a constant low-grade “hum” of stress in the relationship. Every sarcastic jab, cold shoulder, or “fine, I’ll do it” moment might seem small—but those little pull-backs add up. Eventually, your partner starts bracing for you instead of relaxing with you. That shift is subtle, but it’s a big deal.Then I walk you through three common passive-aggressive behaviors that show up in long-term relationships—especially for couples who are “functioning” on the outside but feel disconnected behind the scenes. We’ll talk about what these behaviors look like in real life, why people use them (hint: it’s often self-protection or punishment), and how to interrupt the pattern before it becomes your relationship’s default setting.Most importantly, you’ll learn what to do instead— how to handle everyday annoyances in a way that builds trust instead of slowly burning it down.If you’ve ever thought, “We’re not terrible… but we’re not close,” this episode will hit home. Listen in, and then pick one small change you can practice this week—because the little things don’t just add up in the negative direction. They can add up toward reconnection, too.Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

In this episode of Lucky in Love, I’m talking about the one thing almost every divorce has in common—and it’s not what most people assume.Most marriages don’t end because of one dramatic moment. They end because of tiny turning points—small decisions that quietly change the direction of the relationship… and then get repeated until distance feels normal.I share a personal story from my first marriage—the day things shifted (years before divorce was even on the radar). And then I’ll walk you through the questions I use to help people get real clarity about what’s happening in their relationship right now.If any of this feels familiar, this episode will land:You’re not in constant conflict… but you don’t feel close.You feel that quiet loneliness even though you’re “together.”The little connection habits faded, and nobody really named it.You can’t point to one big event—just a drift you can’t un-feel anymore.This isn’t about blame. It’s about direction—and catching the turning point sooner.Free download mentioned in the outro (VFO): “Stop the Spiral: 3 Mistakes Couples Make When They’re Mad (and what to do instead)” — a practical guide to help you stop the downward spiral and have a better conversation even when you’re angry.Website / freebie link:kahoskins.comSubscribe for new episodes and practical relationship tools.Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

Is your partner a chronic worrier or do they struggle with anxiety? In this episode of 'Lucky in Love', we discusses the often overlooked impact of anxiety on relationships. I emphasize that anxiety affects not only the individual but also their partner, leading to exhaustion and frustration. Through real-life examples, I explains the withdrawal-pursuit cycle that can develop in anxious relationships and offers practical strategies such as implementing a 'worry window' to manage anxiety. I also highlight the importance of effective communication and setting boundaries to maintain a healthy relationship dynamic.  Takeaways Anxiety affects both partners in a relationship.Chronic worrying can lead to exhaustion for both individuals.The withdrawal-pursuit cycle creates disconnection in relationships.Implementing a worry window can help manage anxiety.Effective communication is key to resolving anxiety-related issues.Setting boundaries is essential to prevent burnout.Reassurance is crucial for the anxious partner.Partners should not be each other's therapists.Naming the worry helps in addressing it effectively.Seeking external support can strengthen the relationship.Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

Have you ever led with sarcasm instead of just saying what you wanted or needed? Started a fight you didn’t really want by asking a question you already knew the answer to— just to prove a point?Or began the conversation with a “joke” that wasn’t really a joke - or if your significant other does— this episode of Lucky In Love is for you. I’m breaking down why we pick fights we don’t actually want—and what those “random” arguments are really doing for us. And, I’m teaching you how to stop. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

Do you have a mind-blowing sex life? Do you want one?In this episode, we are talking about common problems couples struggle with when it comes to sex. We’ll talk about pressure, resentment, desire gaps, and the quiet patterns that shut sex down… and then we’ll get into some practical, real-life suggestions that help sex and intimacy feel connected, playful, and yes—spicier.This episode starts mild and heats up as we go, so consider this your friendly warning.If you want better sex that feels natural instead of forced—and you’re open to a few spicy ideas along the way—press play! Free PDF Download Stop The Spiral: https://kari-hoskins-coaching-llc.kit.com/stopthespiralThe Art of Dirty Talk: https://www.elevatedintimacy.com/storeInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

In this episode of Lucky in Love, I'm breaking down the sneaky, often-missed signs your partner is unhappy in your relationship—even if you feel fine. I  explain how mismatched expectations, unresolved resentment, and outside stress can quietly widen the gap between you, showing up as pulling away from rituals, more solo time, short answers, less affection, and a fading sex life. You’ll learn what to watch for and how to start a calm, honest conversation before you end up blindsided by a breakup or divorce.Want some info on working with me? Visit my website: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.comInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

When your significant other says, “I’m unhappy,” it can feel like a gut punch. In this episode, I break down exactly how to respond—without panicking, dismissing, or scrambling. Learn the three-step framework: take it seriously, get curious and listen, then create a real plan of action together.What You’ll LearnWhy “panic or brush-off” responses make things worseThe mindset shift: unhappy ≠ out; unhappy = asking for changeHow to listen without defending, explaining, or justifyingThree curiosity questions that open the conversationHow to move from promises to a concrete, shared planWhy “if nothing changes, nothing changes” is the real bottom lineInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

I’m sure you’ve heard it: “You two just need more date nights.” It’s well-intentioned advice, but when a marriage or relationship is struggling, it can actually make things worse.In this episode of Lucky in Love, I’m breaking down why more dinners out and weekend getaways won’t fix what’s really going on underneath—and what to do instead. Because the truth is, the problem usually isn’t how much time you spend together; it’s how you’re showing up when you’re together.I explain three ways date nights can backfire when a relationship is on shaky ground and walk you through what can actually help you start turning things around.  Whether you’re in a rough season yourself or want to support a friend who is, this episode offers a compassionate reminder: you can’t pour romance over unresolved conflict and expect it to stick. But with small, intentional changes, you can start rebuilding the connection that makes those date nights meaningful again.Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

Have you ever been stuck in gridlock with your partner or spouse? Unable to find a solution you can both agree on? Instead of getting stuck in right-vs-wrong battles, I teach you how a simple mindset shift allows you to hold two truths at the same time — creating space for connection, collaboration, and creative solutions.We will talk about how either/or thinking fuels defensiveness, resentment, and stonewalling, while both/and thinking softens conversations, helps both partners feel heard, and opens the door to solutions that work for everyone. I give you  real-life scenarios — from dividing chores to handling money stress to parenting differences — showing how this simple shift can completely change the feel of a relationship.Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

In this episode of Lucky in Love, I'm counting down the 7 little phrases that can blow up your arguments—and what to say instead. These may seem small in the moment, but they either escalate conflict or chip away at your connection in ways that stick long after the fight is over. I’m sharing why each phrase is so damaging, the deeper emotions that often drive them, and—most importantly—simple alternatives you can use to keep your conversations from blowing up.If you’ve ever walked away from a fight thinking, “That didn't go well,” this episode is for you.Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

Accidentally push your partner’s buttons? You’re not alone. In this episode of Lucky in Love, I share what to do (and not do) when your partner or spouse is triggered, why button-pushing damages trust and intimacy, and how to calm things down, reframe the conversation, and rebuild connection.👉 Grab the free Trigger Reflection Guide at kahoskins.comInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

Do you lose your sh*t when your partner says or does something that triggers you? Yep, the struggle is real. In this episode we talk about my 3 step process of keeping your cool when your partner hits a nerve. You'll learn why certain words, tones, or behaviors can send you into an emotional spiral, how past experiences shape your reactivity, and why some personalities are more sensitive than others. Kari Hoskins shares her personal triggers, real-life client examples, and walks you through a simple 3-step process to help you stay calm, respond thoughtfully, and avoid making things worse in the heat of the moment. If you've ever snapped, shut down, or walked out mid-conversation—this one's for you.Includes a free downloadable Trigger Reflection Guide at kahoskins.comInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

If you're tired of walking on egg shells. If you are feeling disconnected or you simply want a stronger connection this episode is for you. These phrases can create powerful shifts in how connected your partner feels to you. These are everyday words that say, “I see you, I care about you, and I’m with you.” When used with intention, they can bring you closer and strengthen the heart of your relationship.Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

Feeling misunderstood in your relationship? You might be falling into the mind- reading trap—expecting your partner to know what you need without saying a word. In this episode, we uncover three signs you've fallen into this trap, and the signs might surprise you.  You’ll learn how to clearly express what you need, stop guessing games, and rebuild emotional connection through honest communication. This is a must-listen for anyone in a long-term relationship, marriage, or navigating conflict with their partner.Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

You’re not crazy—sometimes it really does feel like your partner isn’t hearing you. But what if the problem isn’t what you’re saying... it’s how you’re saying it?In this episode, Kari breaks down the art of reframing—how to say the same thing in a way that actually gets through. From calling out common communication landmines to showing you exactly how to rework those heated phrases, you’ll walk away with practical tools to help you feel heard without blowing things up. If you're tired of the shutdowns, snapbacks, and same-old fights, this one’s a must-listen.Bonus: You’ll learn how to spot the signs that something needs a reframe before it comes flying out of your mouth.🎯 Communication gold for anyone stuck in a cycle of misfires and misunderstandings.Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

Every couple argues—but what really matters is what happens after. In this episode, we explore the power of repair rituals: those small, intentional gestures that help you reconnect after a fight. Whether it’s a hug, a note, or a shared laugh, these rituals create emotional safety and prevent lingering disconnection.You’ll learn:Why lack of repair—not conflict—is what truly damages relationshipsExamples of verbal, physical, and action-based repair ritualsHow to create your own “come back together” moment after tensionThis episode is packed with practical, real-life tools for couples who want to stop getting stuck in emotional limbo after arguments. Because the truth is: fighting isn’t the enemy—disconnection is.If you’ve ever felt unsure how to move forward after a disagreement, this episode will give you clarity, encouragement, and a place to start.🎧 Next week, we’re talking reframing—a communication skill that can shift the entire tone of your conversations. Don’t miss it!Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

Is your relationship starting to feel a little…meh?You’re not alone—and it’s not a sign you married the wrong person. It is a sign that you might be stuck in a relationship rut.In this episode, we're talking about what really causes that blah feeling in long-term love (hint: it's not just time), why it can be more dangerous than you think, and—most importantly—how to shake things up without doing anything dramatic or awkward.You’ll learn:Subtle signs you’re in a rut (that most couples overlook)Why “just going through the motions” is quietly killing your connectionSimple, no-pressure ways to reintroduce novelty, excitement, and joyPLUS: I’ll tell you how to get my free download, “Twenty Try Me Ideas” —a list of fun ways to refresh your relationship and stop the slow drift into “blah.”Whether you’re already on autopilot or just want to make sure you don’t end up there, this one’s for you.Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

In this episode, we’re talking about what actually happens in your body when you get emotionally triggered—and why it becomes so hard to stay calm and present in the heat of a disagreement. Kari breaks down what it means to become dysregulated, how your nervous system flips into survival mode, and most importantly—how to get back to calm fast.You'll learn 5 simple, science-backed strategies to reset your nervous system in the moment, including box breathing, movement, cold water tricks, grounding techniques, and even why humming can help. Whether you shut down or blow up when you're overwhelmed, this episode will give you the tools to handle high-stress moments with more clarity, control, and confidence.Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

In this episode we talk about how to the tell the difference between a relationship that can be saved and one that probably can't. I share with you 3 questions to ask yourself if you're feeling stuck and unsure if your marriage is fixable. I also share 6 signs that repairing the relationship will be more challening. This episode will provide you with clarity and insight into what it really takes to turn a relationship around. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

In this episode, Kari Hoskins tackles one of the most maddening relationship dynamics: what to do when your partner completely shuts down and refuses to communicate—a pattern known as stonewalling. Kari breaks down why people stonewall (spoiler: it’s often not about you), what it looks like, and why it’s one of the top predictors of divorce. She dives into the damaging Pursue-Withdraw cycle, offers clear signs to help you identify stonewalling, and gives listeners practical tools to break the pattern, reconnect emotionally, and decide how to move forward. Whether you're the pursuer or the distancer, this episode is full of truth bombs, empathy, and smart strategies you can actually use.Learn how to communicate with a partner who has emotionally checked out, rebuild trust, and—if needed—make the tough call with clarity.Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

In this episode of Lucky in Love, we’re diving deep into the sneaky world of self-fulfilling prophecies in relationships. Ever feel disconnected from your partner and then catch yourself acting distant too? That’s not just a mood—it’s your brain quietly sabotaging your connection. Kari breaks down how thoughts like “They don’t care,” “I feel alone,” or “We’re growing apart” can spiral into real disconnection, even if they weren’t true to begin with.You’ll learn how beliefs shape behavior, why assumptions can wreck intimacy, and how to break toxic thought loops before they damage your relationship. Plus, Kari shares a weekly challenge to help you reconnect and rewrite the mental script that’s been holding you back.Whether you're feeling stuck, misunderstood, or just want more emotional connection in your relationship, this episode is your wake-up call.Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

Rituals aren’t just routines—they are powerful ways to deepen connection and strengthen your relationship. In this episode of Lucky in Love, Kari shares how simple, intentional rituals can prevent “roommate syndrome,” enhance intimacy, and even help couples recover from conflict faster. She reflects on her own experiences, from childhood observations of her parents’ rituals to the intentional traditions she and her husband have built. Tune in to discover how to identify, create, and cherish the rituals that strengthen your relationship.Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

In this episode of Lucky in Love, we're diving into a crucial but often overlooked topic: the early warning signs that your relationship might be heading toward trouble. I’ll walk you through eight telltale signs of emotional disconnection—ranging from increasing criticism and lack of meaningful conversation to avoidance and fantasizing about leaving.Many couples don’t recognize these red flags until it's too late, but the good news is that awareness is the first step toward repair. If you see yourself or your partner in these patterns, don’t panic—I’ll also share actionable steps to rebuild your connection, from honest communication to small but powerful changes in daily interactions.Plus, I’ll recommend my favorite books and past podcast episodes that can help you strengthen your relationship before it’s too late. And if you’re ready for deeper guidance, I offer coaching designed to help couples reconnect and thrive.Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

In this podcast episode, Kari Hoskins discusses practical strategies for dealing with a partner or spouse’s anger in a relationship. She provides five essential dos and don’ts, offering advice on how to maintain calm, avoid escalating situations, and communicate effectively during moments of anger. Kari shares insights on identifying underlying emotions like frustration or stress that can trigger anger and how to respond in a healthy way. She also emphasizes the importance of not being defensive or judgmental and offers helpful tips for handling emotional reactions, including when dealing with yelling and minimizing triggers. This episode is a valuable resource for couples looking to improve their relationship communication and constructively manage anger.Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

n this episode, Kari Hoskins tackles a common dilemma many face in relationships: the thought that breaking up might be the key to happiness. She argues that this mindset often leads to confusion and overlooks the more essential question to ask—one that promotes clarity and emotional growth. Kari introduces six powerful happiness habits to help listeners improve their well-being, emphasizing personal agency, self-reflection, and positive relationship practices. These strategies empower individuals to make informed decisions, foster emotional resilience, and cultivate lasting happiness, both within themselves and their relationships. Tune in for practical advice and actionable insights on navigating relationship challenges.Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

In this episode of Lucky in Love, we break down the six essential skills that can make or break a relationship: emotional regulation, mental flexibility, vulnerability, impulse control, perspective-taking, and effective communication. Learn why these skills are crucial for building trust, resolving conflicts, and strengthening your bond with your partner.  How many of these skills do you have?TakeawaysYou need to be using the tools and skills for a stable relationship.Emotional regulation helps manage feelings and responses.Perspective taking fosters understanding and reduces resentment.Vulnerability is essential for building trust and connection.Mental flexibility allows adaptation to changes in the relationship.Impulse control prevents actions that could harm the relationship.Effective communication is crucial for preventing misunderstandings.Each skill can be learned and developed over time.Children learn relationship skills by observing their parents.Identifying strengths and weaknesses in these skills can improve relationships.Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

In this episode of Lucky in Love, we dive into the topic of boundaries in relationships. What are boundaries, and why are they so important? We discuss the telltale signs that your relationship might need boundaries, practical tips for setting them, and how they can strengthen your connection with your partner. Whether you're in a new relationship or years into one, this episode is packed with insights to help you build a healthier, happier dynamic with your significant other. TakeawaysBoundary setting is crucial for healthy relationships.Many people confuse requests with actual boundaries.A boundary consists of unacceptable behavior and a response.It's important to communicate how you will respond if a boundary is crossed.Recognizing feelings of disrespect or resentment can indicate a need for boundaries.Common boundaries include issues around intimacy, privacy, and communication.Your partner is not responsible for respecting your boundaries; you are.Consistent violation of boundaries may indicate a lack of respect.Setting boundaries can prevent larger issues in relationships.Navigating boundary setting can be challenging but is essential for relationship health.Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

Struggling with an annoying family member? In this episode of Lucky in Love, we dive into the common habits that make certain relatives so hard to deal with, uncover the reasons behind their behavior, and share three practical strategies to help you navigate the holidays with less irritation.Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

In this episode of Lucky in Love, we dive deep into how stress impacts your relationship. You will learn about the different types of stress that can sneak into your life, why we tend to act out when overwhelmed, and how to complete the stress cycle to stay emotionally balanced. Plus, discover the secrets to having a stress-reducing conversation that strengthens your connection. Whether you're facing daily challenges or big life transitions, these tools will help you stress-proof your relationship and grow closer as a couple.Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

In this episode, we explore four common listening mistakes that can damage your long-term relationship. Effective communication is key to any successful partnership, but these listening shifts can create distance, misunderstandings, and conflict.https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/abouthttps://www.karihoskinscoaching.comInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

 In this episode, we explore the surprising risks of relationships that seem too peaceful. We learn how avoiding conflict can harm your relationship and why healthy disagreements are essential for growth and understanding. If you’ve ever thought never arguing is a sign of success, this episode will change your perspective—and your relationship—for the better!Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

In this episode, we discuss 3 powerful questions that can be a game changer for your relationship.  You will learn: why these questions are game changers and how to use them according to how happy (or unhappy) you are in your relationship. https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/abouthttps://www.karihoskinscoaching.comInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

In this episode, we discuss how your language influences and shapes your reality.   You will learn:how language affects the way you experience your life and relationshiphow to examine the language you're  frequently usinghow subtle changes can help you have better daily experience how to use language to keep your relationship on track. https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/abouthttps://www.karihoskinscoaching.comInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

In this episode, we discuss six effective strategies to enhance communication and foster vulnerability in your relationship.  You'll discover practical tips for creating a safe space for open dialogue and building trust with your partner. https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/abouthttps://www.karihoskinscoaching.comInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

In this episode we explore what makes a decision feel challenging, discuss common mistakes to avoid, and decision making strategies that make a hard choice a little bit easier. https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/abouthttps://www.karihoskinscoaching.comInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

In this episode, we discuss how to communicate when you're feeling defensive. We also discuss the impact that defensiveness has on relationships and where "default" defensiveness stems from. Whether you tend to be defensive yourself or in a relationship with someone who is, there's something in this episode for you. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.comMixed and Edited by NextDayPodcastInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

In this episode, I discuss how you can help your partner make changes without destroying your relationship. I'll cover the four key characteristics someone needs to make changes-that-stick and  answer the question, "What if my partner can't or won't change?"  Enjoy! Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.comMixed and Edited by NextDayPodcastInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

In this episode, I share my top 10 tips for creating an effortless-feeling relationship. We also discuss how to use these tips depending on your relationship status. This episode will help you create a stronger, more loving relationship.  Whether you're single, new dating, or in a committed relationship, this episode has something for you.https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/abouthttps://www.karihoskinscoaching.comInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

In this episode, we talk about what it means to protect your relationship from yourself, and how to do it. I also share my thoughts on incorporating these concepts into your life. No matter what phase of life your're in--single, in a new relationship, or you've been committed for decades--there's something for everyone. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.comMixed and Edited by NextDayPodcastInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

LUCKY IN LOVE is an upcoming podcast that talks about what "makes and breaks" relationships. It's for people interested in learning how to build healthy, happy relationships that last. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/aboutWebsite: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com